All language subtitles for Bewitched S03E12 Sams Spooky Chair_track3_[eng]

How do you do, madam?
Is there something
you desire?

No, thank you.
Just browsing.
By all means.

Are you an antique bug?

Sort of.

Oh, you do have
some lovely things.

Yes, we have
some excellent pieces.

This desk, for instance,
made in France in 1753.

And priced
at only $800.

Eight hundred dollars?

Well, it is beautiful,

but I’m afraid that I...
Yes. Well.

Um...

Do you have, uh, something
maybe in early American,
a little less expensive?

Less expensive?

Madam, I sell antiques,
not used furniture.

Oh, how peculiar.
I thought
I threw this away.

What’s the matter with it?
Oh, it’s a badly made copy.

Terrible workmanship.
Not our class
of merchandise.

Oh, well, I think
it’s rather fascinating.

Oh?
How much is it?

Well, since
you’re so interested...

Only $100.

Well, I’m not that interested.
Just fascinated.

It’s yours
for 25 bucks.

Thank you.

Madam, would you
do me a favor?

Yes, I’ll try.

Don’t tell anyone
where you bought it.

Oh!

Really, madam.

Clumsy.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(PHONE RINGING)

Oh.

Oh, Tabatha.
Oh, my goodness,
you are a mess.

(CHUCKLES)
(CONTINUES RINGING)

Oh.

Hello?

Honey, the Cosgroves
will be over to dinner
at 7:30, is that all right?

(CHUCKLING)
Oh, yeah, fine.

Uh, Tabatha’s helping.

Your favorite,
mushed-up bananas
and spinach.

Made by hand,
I hope.

(TABATHA COOING)
Oh, very definitely.

Yeah.
I’ll see you later, honey.

Okay. Bye-bye.

She making
something special?

Mushed bananas
and spinach.
Ugh.

Much too good
for the Cosgroves.

I hate these
annual dinners.

Why? It’s always
at my house.
(CHUCKLES)

Larry, they’ll renew
the contract.
I don’t know.

I heard the Fairfield
Slee Agency’s interested
in the account.

Relax, Larry.

With one of Sam’s delicious
dinners in Cosgrove’s stomach,
we can’t miss.

It’s not his stomach
I’m worried about.
It’s his wife’s mouth.

That’s right. He doesn’t
make a move without her.
Mmm, not a move.

You know,
I hate to see a guy depend
on his wife like that.

What time are you
coming over tonight?
I better call Louise.

Well, don’t sit there.
Go on home and see
if everything’s all right.

So early?
It’s a whole four minutes
before closing time.

Remember that
when I don’t
give you a raise.

Honey, I’m home!

I’m in the kitchen.

Hi, sweetheart.
Hi.

Mmm!
That smells delicious!

(CHUCKLES) I’m boiling
the baby’s bottles.

Oh. (CHUCKLES)

The dining room table
looks beautiful.

You’re going to have
the Cosgroves eating
out of your hands.

Good. Then I won’t
need any plates.

Mmm.

Hey, where did you
get that chair?

At an antiques store.
Why?

It only cost $25.
That’s a good reason.

Oh, Darrin,
I couldn’t resist it.

You could have tried.
Mmm-hmm.

What are you gonna
do with it?

We could try
sitting in it.
Hey, that’s an idea.

No, where’re you gonna put it?
It sure doesn’t fit
in the living room.

We’ll think
of something later.

Do you mind if I put it
in the den for tonight?
No. Okay.

Okay.

That still smells
delicious.
Oh.

And so,
there we were in Rome.

Italy, that is.

Oh.
Italy.

And I saw
this gorgeous fountain.

And I say, "Isn’t that
a gorgeous fountain, Max?"

She’s terribly clever.

She could always spot
gorgeous fountains.

(CHUCKLES)

Oh, that’s marvelous,
because most of them
are so, uh...

(SIGHS) Run-of-the-mill.

(DARRIN CHUCKLES)

True?
True. Very true.

Well, it was ridiculous
what they were asking
for anything that old.

Well, they constantly try
to cheat you over there.

It’s almost impossible
to get your money’s worth.

Oh, you know you’ll get
your money’s worth with
our campaign, Max. (LAUGHS)

I know about your campaign.
Don’t talk business at dinner.

Where was I?

Oh. You know...

We’ve been
around the world twice.

Next year, we’re planning
to go someplace else.

Do you have any ideas
where we can go?

Let’s just go into the
living room for now.

Yes.

That’s not where
I had in mind.

Louise!

I don’t think
he’s gonna sign.

Don’t worry, Larry.
There’s plenty of time.

Take another pill.
(SIGHS)

I’ve already
eaten the box.

(CHUCKLES) Go on.

Where did you get
this ultra-rare
and unusual chair?

At a little antique shop...
Oh, marvelous.

I’ll run over there
first thing in the morning.

Well, they only had one.
Oh.

That could be
a problem.

But not a big problem,
not if you’d consider
selling it to me.

Oh, believe me, Samantha.

I wouldn’t dream
of asking you
if I didn’t really want it.

Huh?

(STUTTERS)
I’d do anything to have it.
It just fits our house.

Doesn’t it, Max?

This maybe it.
Give her the chair.

Uh, Sam,
what do you think?

Well, I rather like
that chair.

Honey!
(LARRY GRUNTS)

Well...

Mrs. Cosgrove.

If you really like the chair
that much, I’d love
for you to have it.

(GASPS) Oh, Samantha,
that’s very good of you.
Uh, baby doll, I...

Quiet!
(CHUCKLES) Angel.

How much do you want
for it, Samantha?

Oh, nothing.
It’s a gift.

Oh, nonsense. I want
to make a business deal.

So do we.

Twenty-five dollars
be too much?

Oh, it’s worth much more.

Pay her, Max.
Yes, dear.

Well, now that that’s
all settled, let’s talk
some business, Max.

Twenty-five dollars,
my dear.
Oh, Max, it’s late.

Oh, I can’t wait
to see this chair
in our living room.

But the contract!
Max will sign it
in the morning.

In the morning?
He’ll sign
in the morning.

Max, I’ll see you
in the morning.

I’ll put that
in the car for you.

Oh, thank you.

(LARRY LAUGHING)

Oh, no, no, that’s all right.
Need a little help, Darrin?

No, Larry.

It can’t be
that heavy now.

Ooh!
(DARRIN GRUNTING)

(BOTH SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

See, that’s the way
they used to make chairs.
See you in the morning, Max.

MRS. COSGROVE: Good night.
LARRY: Mrs. Cosgrove,
good night.

MRS. COSGROVE:
Thank you so much. Thank you.
SAM: Enjoy it.

Good night, my dear.
Good night, Mr. Cosgrove.

You’re a very sweet boy,
Darrin, but completely
uncoordinated.

Come, Max.
Good night, all.

Good night.
Good night.

Honey, I hope
you didn’t mind
giving them the chair.

But for my part,
I was kind of glad
to get rid of it.

Well, I do like the chair,
but as long as it helps you,
I don’t mind.

Besides,
I like you better.

I like you too.

I have a feeling
there was something spooky
about that chair.

A spooky chair?
Darrin, that’s ridiculous.

(THUDDING)

Darrin?

Darrin?
Mmm. Mmm.

What was that?
What was what?

That sound.

I heard a noise downstairs.

Oh, you must be dreaming.
I don’t think so.

Then I must be.
Go back to sleep, honey.

Darrin, I heard a noise.

Maybe it’s the baby.

Then she must be wearing
your galoshes.

Say, you are
a spooky chair.

When I came downstairs,
there was that spooky chair
bowing to me.

Oh, how charming.

Charming?
At 4:00 in the morning?
Mother, what could it be?

Well, I’ve heard
of a few of us
who’d turned into objects.

Really?
Yes. Some do
when they retire.

Others do
when they get angry.

Wha... Do you think
it could be dangerous?

I don’t know.

Why don’t you test it
on Durwood?

Oh, mother, really.
(PHONE RINGS)

(CHUCKLES)

Darrin doesn’t even know
about the chair.
Oh.

No, I hid it before
he went to the office.

Hello?

Hello, Sam.

Oh, hi, sweetheart.

We were just talking
about you.

Mother sends her love.
(SHUDDERS)

Sam, we got a problem.
The chair’s been stolen
from the Cosgroves.

Stolen? Wh...

Darrin, I think
you ought to know that...

Adelaide blames Max for
leaving the door open because
he didn’t like the chair.

They’re having
a terrible argument.

And while they’re arguing,
Max won’t sign the contract.
Can you find another one?

(STUTTERING)
I’m afraid
it’s one-of-a-kind.

Darrin, I think
you ought to come home.

Something wrong?
No, no, it’s...

(WHISPERS)
It’s about the chair.

I can’t talk about it
on the phone.

I’ll be right home.
Anything wrong?

Something about the chair.
Well, then, go on home.
Maybe she’s found it.

I’ll send Louise over
to the Cosgroves.

She’s an expert
on marital arguments.

She is? Huh.
Lots of experience,
all with me.

(GRUNTING)

Oh, dear.
Mother. Mother?

Oh, boy, you’re always around
when I don’t need you,
but when I do...

What is all that racket?

That’s Darrin.
I had to tell him
about the chair.

He came home, and now
he’s in the study
fighting with it.

What do you want me
to do, darling?
Referee?

Well, there must be
something.

I told you
it was a spooky chair.

And whoever or whatever it is,
it absolutely hates Darrin.

We can’t hold that
against it, can we?

I can.

You don’t suppose it could be
one of our relatives?

Certainly not!

Not one of our relatives
is in furniture.

Well, it’s causing
all sorts of trouble.

Now, I can’t give it back
to the Cosgroves
if it’s Bewitched.

What am I gonna do?

Nothing.

Nothing?

No, not a thing,
until we know for sure
what it is.

Well, yes, but...
(DOORBELL RINGS)

(GASPS)
It’s Mr. Cosgrove!

(WHISPERS)
Call me back.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Oh, hi, Mr. Cosgrove.
What a lovely surprise.

My dear,
I’m sorry to bother you,

but I was on my way over
to the antique shop,

but I couldn’t
remember the name.

You know, where you
purchased the chair.

Oh, yes.
Darrin told me
about the robbery.

Yes. Uh, Adelaide blames me.
She says I left
the door open.

Oh, I’ve just got to find
another one, because...

(THUDDING)
What’s that noise?

Darrin. He’s doing
his morning exercises.

Does them every day.
Oh.

Don’t exercise
too hard, dear!

Oh, hello, Mr. Cosgrove.
I was just doing
my morning workout.

That’s it!
(STUTTERS)
That’s the chair!

(STAMMERS) That’s, um...
A copy.
Copy.

I can’t tell the difference.
Oh, please let me
take this to Adelaide.

She’ll love it,
and then she’ll love
me again.

Aw, but, Mr. Cosgrove,
it’s only a copy. I mean...
I must have it!

Oh, I’m sorry,
but when Adelaide gets angry,
I just can’t think straight.

Now, what does it cost?
I’ll pay anything you ask.

It’s very expensive.
Much more
than the original.

Good.
Now, I do appreciate this,
so just send us a bill.

I want Adelaide
to see this right away.

Well, why don’t you
let Darrin bring it
to your house?

I’d rather take it myself.

Well, it’s no trouble,
Mr. Cosgrove,
and it might scratch your car.

No, the sooner Adelaide
forgives and forgets,
the better.

(STAMMERING) I’ll tell Tate
to send the contract over
to my house.

Thank you very much.

Uh...

Well, I guess
he’s gonna sign.
Yeah, well, if he lives.

You don’t think that
that chair’s deliberately

trying to blow
the Cosgrove deal for me,
do you?

Well, I don’t know,
but that’s what
we’ve got to find out.

Now, Darrin, you go
to the antique store,

find out all you can
about that chair.

How old it is,
you know.

Meet me at the Cosgrove’s
right away, and hurry.
Mmm-hmm. Mmm. Right.

Goodbye.
Goodbye.

Would you mind baby-sitting
for a little while?
Oh, I’d love to!

Yeah, well,
don’t teach Tabatha
any new tricks.

Oh, killjoy.

What are you
going to do?

I’m going to the Cosgroves’
to keep an eye on that chair.
Oh.

Hmm. And while I’m gone,
why don’t you get in touch
with Aunt Hagatha,

and Daddy,
and maybe Aunt Enchantra.

They might know
something about it.
All right?

Mmm-hmm.
Oh, bye.

There, my sweet.
Just like the other one.

And I shall guard this
with my life.
(CHUCKLES)

Oh, I’m so grateful
to Samantha and Darrin...

My darling,
are you all right?
Why did you do that?

(STAMMERS)
But I did nothing, my love.
Nothing.

I never realized,
you’re a dangerous man.

(DOORBELL RINGING)
Go answer the door.

Adelaide, I’m really
not dangerous.

Hi, Mr. Cosgrove,
Mrs. Cosgrove.
I was just passing by...

Oh, Samantha.

You came just in time.
He just threw me
out of the chair.

Really?
Darling, I did not.

You did!
I was sitting in it,
just like...

Perhaps you shouldn’t
sit in it, Mrs. Cosgrove.
Maybe it has a broken leg.

She’s right, darling.
Please, do be careful.

You see? There’s nothing
wrong with it.

Oh, you and Darrin
were such...

SAM: Oh, dear!

(SAM STAMMERING)

(COUGHING)

Mrs. Cosgrove,
are you all right?

What are you doing?
He tried to choke me!

Darling, you know
I’d never do
anything like that. I just...

Your front door was open,
So we just... (CHUCKLES)
We just walked right in.

Hello, everybody.
SAM: Hi, Louise, Larry.

Tate. Mrs. Tate.
Sam. Well, Max.

Hello.
Here we are
with your contract.

Oh, this is no time
for contracts.

(GASPS)
You found another chair.

Is Darrin here?

Max! You broke my chair!
(MAX GRUNTING)

You did it on purpose!
That’s it!
That’s the last straw!

I’m going home to Mother!
Get my suitcase!

Adelaide! Adelaide!
You can’t leave me!

(STUTTERS) Mrs. Cosgrove,
really. I’m sure he had
nothing to do with it...

(EXCLAIMING) Adelaide!
But Max, Max,
the contract!

I can’t sign
any contract now!
LOUISE: Oh, Mrs. Cosgrove!

MAX:
Adelaide! Adelaide!

He’ll never sign
the contract!
Never!

The other agency’ll
get him.
Sam, what’s going on here?

LOUISE: Mrs. Cosgrove!

...light of my life,
I’ll give you
anything you want.

Anything.
I’ll even go to Rome
and buy that fountain for you.

And I’ll buy the water!
MAX: Yes.

LOUISE:
Mrs. Cosgrove,
I’m sure it can be worked out.

Did you find out anything?

The chair was bought
at an auction, in Boston,
at the turn of the century.

Which one?
Sam!

Boston, huh?
What does it mean?

Well... Uh, Boston.
Uh-huh.

Beans.
Yeah?

Tea party.
Uh-huh.

Nothing.
Uh...

Well, maybe Mother found
something out.
You wait here.

MAX:
Please, honey bunch?
LARRY: Mrs. Cosgrove!

ADELAIDE:
My mind’s made up.
What’s with the Cosgroves?

Well, you heard. You just
stay here and make sure
the coast is clear, huh?

Stand up.

Now, come with me.

Mother.

Mother?

Mother, did you
find out anything?

You remember...

Stop it!

You remember
the Farnsworth family?

Yes, they lived
on our street
in Boston.

Does it belong
to them?
Well, sort of.

It’s not one of them?

(GASPS) Not him!

Yes. He had Enchantra
transform him
when you rejected him.

Reject... Wha...
I never rejected him!

I never even gave him
any encouragement.
We were friends.

Not as far as he was
concerned, love.

Oh... (CLICKS TONGUE)
Oh, mother.

What was the spell
Aunt Enchantra used?

The simple one,
without the oxtails.

All right. Thank you.

Now, I think it’s time
for a little
woman-to-chair chat.

I think you’re right, dear.

Okay, Clyde Farnsworth.

You just come out here
and face me like a...

A chair.

It won’t do you
any good to hide.

I said come here,
and I mean it.

Do you realize
the trouble you’ve caused?

Not just Darrin and me,
but look at the uproar
the Cosgroves are in.

You should be
ashamed of yourself.

Clyde, I’m speaking
to you.

Now, I might be able
to understand if you had
any sort of excuse, but...

Well, that’s no excuse.
That’s nonsense.

Now, you did not have
yourself turned into a chair
because I rejected you.

I told you on our first
and only date

that we could never be
anything more than friends.

Oh, Clyde, now if you’re
gonna crumble up like that,

we’re never gonna
get anywhere.

Besides, that’s no way
to get my sympathy.

Much.

Well, Clyde,
I don’t understand.

If you’re supposed to be
in love with me, why are you
causing all this trouble?

LOUISE:
Please, Mrs. Cosgrove,
won’t you reconsider?

ADELAIDE:
Reconsider living
with a dangerous man?

MAX: Please believe me.
I’m not dangerous, love pot.

LARRY:
Take my word for it, love pot.
I mean, Mrs. Cosgrove.

Sam, what are you doing?
What do you think?
I’m talking to the chair.

Ask a foolish question...
Darrin, do me a favor.
Go back inside

and make sure no one
comes out here.

You understand? Hmm?
Yeah, all right.

Oh.

So that’s it.

You’re jealous
of Darrin, huh?

Oh. Well, now, Clyde,
he is my husband,
and I love him very much.

And nothing you can do
can change that.
You understand?

Now, I’m going
to give you a choice.

You can either keep feeling
sorry for yourself and remain
a miserable old chair,

or I can change you back
into human form, but I can’t
do it unless you’re willing.

Good.

Chair of cloth
and wood and grain,

become a human being
again.

(GASPS)

Oh, Clyde.
Why, you haven’t
changed a bit.

Not even your clothes.

Samantha, you’re as beautiful
as you always were.

Isn’t there any hope
for us?

We can still be friends.
I’d like that.

Well, I’ll be going now.

Where are you going?

Back to the antique store.
I’ve got someone there
that loves me.

Oh, does she work there?

No. She’s a lamp.

Oh. (STUTTERS) Well, uh...

Clyde, before you leave, uh,
could I make a copy of you?

As a chair, I mean.

I really need it, and I can’t
do it without your permission.

Oh, please allow me.
As a gift to you.

And Darrin.

Oh, well, Clyde,
that’s awfully sporting
of you.

ADELAIDE: I should’ve
listened to Pa. That’s who
I should’ve listened to.

LARRY: Louise,
don’t just stand there.

LOUISE: Well, what do you
want me to do?

LARRY:
Mrs. Cosgrove, please?
SAM: Psst. Darrin.

ADELAIDE:
My mind’s made up.

It’s all right.
Mrs. Cosgrove!

Mrs. Cosgrove?
What?

(STUTTERS)
I fixed the chair.

Well, how could you?
Max broke the legs.

No, no, he didn’t.
It has collapsible legs,

so I just pushed them back
in place and locked them.

Then Max didn’t
break the chair?
Mmm-mmm.

Oh, Max, I’m sorry.

I shouldn’t have
blamed you, tweety bird.

Will you forgive me?

Of course, I will,
cupcake.

Will you forgive me?

I forgive you,
huggy bear.

And I forgive you, poopsie.

Uh, forgive me,
but what about
the contract?

Is it all right
if I sign, love pot?

By all means, honey bunch.
(CHUCKLES)

Tea, anyone?
Oh, delightful!

(ALL CHATTERING)

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

Darling,
I’m proud of you.

Well, don’t thank me,
thank Clyde Farnsworth.
It’s a gift from him.

Clyde Farnsworth?

Yeah, I’ll explain later.
Okay.

(SCREAMS)

Sam!

Well...

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)