All language subtitles for Bewitched S03E03 Witches and Warlocks Are My Favorite Things_track3_[eng]

Mother, it’s the
middle of the night.

That’s the proper time
for us, you know.

Well, what is it?
I thought you should know

that tomorrow has
been chosen as the day
of the Witches’ coven.

Coven? Why? Who?

Your aunts,
the entire group.

Oh?
They’re flying in
from all over the world.

Clara has been collecting
old doorknobs in Bolivia,

and Enchantra
has been coaching
a yogi in Outer Mongolia,

and Hagatha is coming
from her school.

What’s the occasion?
We’ve all been
designated a coven

to examine and report
on Tabatha.

Report?
What kind of report?

Ordinarily I don’t get myself
involved in committee work.

I’ve done more than my share,
as you well know.

But Tabatha is my grandchild,

and I want to be here
when her powers are measured.

Good.
I’d like to know myself.

Uh-oh.
Darrin will object.

Oh, boy, will he object.

That’s why I came
to tell you tonight.

Get rid of him!
What?

Not permanently,
just for tomorrow.

Although permanently is
a more attractive idea.

Well, fortunately,
that won’t be necessary.

Even though
tomorrow’s Saturday,
Darrin has to work.

So, we’re in the clear.
Splendid!

SAM: I don’t have to measure
your powers, Tabatha.

I know you’re
the most adorable
little witch in the world.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Bye-bye, honey.

Think you’re gonna
have to work late?

Isn’t having to work
Saturday bad enough?

Somebody ought to tell
Larry Tate about the 40-hour
week, the 8-hour day,

talk about your slave drivers.
Oh, now, darling,
Larry’s not that bad.

He’s not, huh?

Greetings.

Would you mind knocking
before you pop in?

Well, I thought you were
on your way to work.

I am, and somehow,
you showing up makes it
all seem worthwhile.

I’ll call you later.
Oh, please do, especially
before you come home.

Why?
Well, so I can have a martini
in the window. What else?

That’s a good idea.
Don’t feel you have to
wait for me, Endora.

Never fear.

Oh, that mortal!

Oh, I do hope Tabatha’s
powers are not limited to
her unfortunate lineage.

That unfortunate lineage
happens to be Tabatha’s father
and my husband,

and I’ll thank you
to remember that.
I know, but I love her anyhow.

(RUSTLING)
(THUDDING)

Ooh! Oooh-ooh!

Ooh-ooh! Ooh, dear.

Ooh-ooh-ooh.

Ooh, dear.
Aunt Clara,
are you all right?

Oh, yes, oh, yes.
I’m all right.

Oh, dear.

Oh, yes.
(CHUCKLES)

You know, Samantha,

I’m afraid that you’re
going to have to
put a bigger chimney in.

(LAUGHS)
You know?

You might try coming
through the door, Clara.

And lose my
professional
standing?

Oh, there’s
the little darling.

What a dear little girl.
Oh!
Quack! Quack, quack.

Oh, it’s so long since
we’ve tested a child.

Aren’t you excited, dear?
Oh, yes, I certainly
am, Aunt Clara.

I hope the others
aren’t too late.
I’d like to get on with it.

Mother, do you think
Daddy’ll be here?

I have no idea
where Maurice is,

and I have no intention
of hunting him down.

Well, it would be nice
if he were here.

Why?
(THUNDER RUMBLES)

It’s your father.

Because Tabatha is also
my grandchild.

Oh, Daddy!

How’s Daddy’s
little girl, eh?

May I remind you that she is
also Mama’s little girl?

I wish you’d stop
making these unannounced
theatrical entrances, Maurice.

It’s really quite unnerving.

I’d always hoped somehow that
age would mellow you, Endora,

instead, you’re
just puckering up.

Oh, now-now,
Mother, Daddy, don’t.

Clara,
it’s been a long time.

Maurice, you’re looking
very well.

Oh, dere she is!

Dere’s Mauwice’s
little pwecious.

Ugh, ugh, ugh!

Do that again,

and I’ll make you
talk baby talk for the rest
of your unnatural life.

You wouldn’t dare.

Well, she’s quite
a little girl, isn’t she?

Yes, and she’s certainly
got it. There’s no
question of that.

I’m glad you’re
pleased, Daddy.

You know, there’s a lot of me
in this little darling.

A certain nobility,
a certain fire, a...

How about
"sickening charm"?

Someday, Endora. Someday.

(CHUCKLES)

Daddy, are you
going to be able
to stay for a while?

Aunt Hagatha
and Aunt Enchantra
are coming here.

A coven, eh? Well, the child
must certainly be certified.

There’s no doubt about that,
Samantha. Tests must be made.

You’ll stay for them?
MAURICE: I’m sorry.
I was on my way

to the opera in Vienna
when I heard about Tabatha.

They’re doing Faust tonight.
I always get a million
laughs out of that.

Besides, you don’t need me.
This is women’s work.

Clara, you’re looking
more ravishing than ever.

Oh, thank you very much,
Maurice. (CHUCKLES)

I must leave before this
gaggle of geese gets here.

Let me know what
their findings are.

How will I be able
to get in touch with you?

Right. (WHISTLES)

This...
(NO SOUND)

This will always
get through to me.

Oh, thank you, Father.

Well, curtain time!

Keep smiling, Endora.

(THUNDER RUMBLES)

I’ll never know
what I saw in that man.

I know.

What in the world is
keeping them?

I’m due in Tel Aviv
this afternoon.

Oh, really?
What’s in Tel Aviv?

"What’s in Tel Aviv?"
The surf’s up, my dear.

(HORN HONKING)
Wait a minute!
I hear them coming.

(HONKING CONTINUES)

Oh!

Aunt Hagatha, Aunt Enchantra,
how lovely to see you both.

Thank you, dear.
Nice to be here.

Ah, you came together.
How very sisterly.

Hagatha picked me up
on the way.

You’re both late.
Let’s get on with it.

Thank you, Macbeth.
We won’t be needing
you for a while.

Where is the little darling?
Oh, she’s in the kitchen
eating some cookies.

Oh, she shouldn’t have
anything to eat
before the tests.

Oh, I’m sorry.
I forgot, Aunt Hagatha.

Well, I’ll just have to
make allowances for it.

SAM: Be careful.
She’s just a baby.

Well, we haven’t
lost a patient yet, dear,
308 years certifying witches.

I hope the husband
isn’t home.

The poor dear’s working.

Oh, well, good. Humans emit
a low-grade frequency
which upsets my instruments.

Uh, put this
on the child, Clara.

Yes. Oh, it’s a pity
that Darrin had to work today.

Some of your ideas are
mighty provocative, Darrin.

Mighty provoc...

Where did you get that?

Uh, this?

Well, Samantha gave it
to me. It’s a...

Well, in case we go
out to lunch,
and you have some, uh,

spaghetti or lobster or...

What else is kind of drippy?

You want a straight answer?

This Saturday work
must be getting to him.

Must be getting to me, too.

Aunt Clara.
Eight to five,
it’s Aunt Clara.

Tabatha.

(INSTRUMENT BEEPING)

ALL: Lovely!

Well, I knew it all the time.
I knew it! I knew it!
(BEEPING CONTINUES)

(ALL GASPING, EXCLAIMING)

Well, it’s all over.

Wait until you hear
the results.

Well, that’s it.

Tabatha has been tested
by the approved methods
and standards.

And I come to
the conclusion

that despite the fact she’s
a product of a mixed marriage,

her powers are amazing,

and she shows
a great potential.

Therefore, I, Hagatha,

do hereby declare and certify
the child, Tabatha,

to be a true and
verified witch.

(ALL EXCLAIMING, CHATTERING)

Lovely tea, Samantha.
Thank you, Aunt Clara.

Well, let’s finish up here,
girls. We have some decisions
to make about Tabatha.

Decisions? What decisions?

We have to decide
what Tabatha’s whole
future is going to be.

Well, I think that’s a matter
for Darrin and me to decide,
don’t you?

Yes, well, after all,
they are the mummy and daddy.

Quiet, Clara.
You too, Samantha.

It’s our responsibility.

Well, I don’t see it that way.

You will.

Sam, what is going on here?
Who...

Darrin, dear.
Who are these,
these, these...

SAM: Darrin? Dear?
DARRIN: Huh? What?

Um, this is
my Aunt Hagatha,

and my Aunt Enchantra.

This is Darrin,
my husband,
Tabatha’s father.

Well, well.

Yes, indeed.

Well, I suppose
it’s a matter of taste.

Yes. " De gustibus"
and all that. Pity.

It’s getting late,
and we still have
some decisions to make.

Let’s get on with it.

With what?
Get on with what?
Don’t interrupt, Darwood.

Darling, they’ve been
testing Tabatha,

and they’ve found out
that her magical powers
are very, very strong.

Well, I guess we’ll
just have to live
with it, that’s all.

Quiet!
Clara, any comments?

Uh, well, well, yes.
Yes, of course.

(STAMMERING)
I, um, I, I, I...

And, um...
On the other hand,
you know, I, I, I...

Thank you, Clara.
Enchantra?

In view of the fact that
Tabatha is the first witch
of her generation,

and because of her importance
in the hierarchy,

I feel she should be
immediately sent
to your school.

I agree.
I agree with Enchantra.

After all, Samantha went
to Hagatha’s school.

All the really
chic people did.
Now, wait a minute!

You’re interrupting again.

I’m the father,
and I have a few questions.
Where is this school?

That, young man,
is none of your business.

Now, Aunt Enchantra,
really! Mother,
this has gone far enough.

Testing Tabatha was one thing,

but making decisions
about her future, well,
that’s something else.

Right!
This is our business.
Tabatha is our daughter,

and Miss Tabatha Stephens is
going to our public schools.

That’s it.
I have spoken.

How dare you?

Whoops.
Easy.

How dare you talk to us
in that tone of voice?

You impudent nothing!
You mortal!

Don’t you talk to
my husband like that.

He has every right
to say what he thinks.

This is his house,
and Tabatha is his daughter.

Oh, you know, I think
I have a wonderful idea.

Uh, well, I, I thought, um...

Um...

Now, what was that?

Oh, yes! Oh, yes.
Now, why doesn’t, um...

Enchantra move in

and stay with you
as Tabatha’s teacher?

Not a chance!
Not a prayer!

Well, if you feel
as strongly as that,

maybe we’d better
think about it some more,

sort of
m-m-m-m-mull it over.

There will be no mulling.
Everybody out!

I’ve had enough of the whole
kit and caboodle of you!
Out! Out!

Bravo! Bravo!

Um, well, I mean,
you have to admit,

that he said that
with a great deal of spirit.

Well, I agree with Darrin.

Tabatha stays here.
That’s our decision,
and it’s final.

Girls...

Uh, I don’t hear you.
Wh... What did you say?

Oh, listen, dears,
speak louder.
I can’t hear a word you say.

No, I can’t...
Can’t hear you.

Oh, well, it doesn’t matter.
Whatever they say,
I’m on your side.

ENDORA: Samantha,
it really hurts me

that you’ve drifted
so far from our tradition
and your great heritage.

Now, we’ve
heard your decision.

Now hear ours.

You’re both obviously
incompetent to raise a child
as important as Tabatha.

Therefore, we’re sending her
to Hagatha’s school at once.

That child leaves this house
only over my dead body!

Unfortunately,
that won’t be necessary.

Girls.

Sam, I can’t move my feet.
I can’t either.
Mother, you stop this.

Well, of all
the chintzy tricks!

Tabatha!

That’s kidnapping!
How dare you...

Mother, you’re going
to be so sorry for this.
Just wait...

That’s enough
out of all of you.

Girls.

(BIRD-CHIRPING SOUNDS)

You may be angry now,
Samantha,

but we’re doing this
for Tabatha’s own good.

You’ll thank us
for it later on.

HAGATHA: And I’m sure
your father would approve.

(NO SOUND)

(THUNDER RUMBLES)

Trouble, Samantha?

(CHIRPING CONTINUES)

All right.
I get the picture.

A little bit of
witch-napping, eh?

Oh, go back to your opera,
Maurice, and stop interfering.

That baby belongs
in her room.

Now then,
take the spell off them.

Unthinkable!
We’ll do no such thing!

Out of the question!
It’s for our grandchild’s
own good!

Why, you muddling,
bumbling bunch of creaking
old crones!

I ought to...
Oh, Maurice,
stop the theatrics.

Honestly, I think
you should have been an actor
instead of a warlock.

Perhaps, madam, and I should
have been
the greatest of them.

I should have
played Hamlet.

"O, that this too,
too solid flesh would melt,

"Thaw, and resolve
itself into a dew!

"Or that the Everlasting..."
(CHIRPING RESUMES)

All right, all right.
I heard you the first time.

Maurice,
will you please leave?

You’ll miss
your favorite aria.

Oh, no, I won’t.

They can’t put the curtain
up on the third act
until I get back.

Take the spell off them.

Now, you have no right to
interfere with the decisions
of this committee.

One word more
out of you, madam,
and...

HAGATHA: And what?

This!
(THUNDER RUMBLES)

Where are we?
Where are we?

Oh!
Oh, it’s so cold!

It’s Mount Everest!

Oh, that ham!

I didn’t think
he’d dare!

Oh, I’m freezing!
We shall be here forever!

Oh, not I.
I’m not dressed for it!

Oh, all right!
Maurice!

I think they’ll be
more flexible now,

once they’ve thawed out.

(WOMEN EXCLAIMING)

Ladies, I’m waiting.

(SIGHS) All right.

Thank you, Daddy.
Oh, yes!

There will be
no more interfering
with my grandchild.

Macbeth!

(NO SOUND)

Ladies?

Well, ladies?

Well done, Daddy.

For you and my darling
granddaughter, anything.

I’d like to
thank you too, sir.

For you, nothing.

You happen to be just
standing in the fallout
of my love for my daughter.

Gee, thanks, Dad.
MAURICE: Watch it, boy.

Well, time for
the third act of Faust.

Can’t keep the curtain waiting
any longer, or Mephistopheles
will have hysterics.

(LAUGHS) Oh.

Maurice, would you mind
dropping me...

Clara! I can think
of no nicer company.

(CHUCKLES)
Come along.

♪ Glory and love
to the men of old ♪

(THUNDER RUMBLES)

He’s quite a guy,
your father.

He’s really very nice
when you get to know him.

It’s okay, honey.
I understand your father.

Under that suave,
polished exterior,
he hates me.

Well, that’s all right,
sweetheart.

Because under this
smooth, girlish
exterior, I love you.

Oh, well.

Darrin,

even though they found that
Tabatha has great potential,

her powers are still
very limited.

She is just a baby,
after all.
(CHUCKLES)

I knew you’d understand.

Her powers may be limited,
but her appetite isn’t.

I, I’ll handle it.

(SIGHS)

(GASPS) Daddy!

Shh!
Just got her to sleep.

Two visits in one day.
What a marvelous surprise.

Well, I’m a grandfather.

I just thought I’d do
a little bit of babysitting.

Why don’t you and Dolphin
go out for the evening?

Well, thank you, Daddy.
That would be wonderful.

MAURICE: The evening’s on me.
Where would you like to go?

Bullfights in Madrid,
skiing in Switzerland,

a cup of tea
at the foot of Fujiyama?

What would you like to see?

Daddy, nothing in the world
could top what I’m
looking at right now.