All language subtitles for Bewitched S02E19 My Baby, the Tycoon 1080p AI Upscale DVD x265 HEVC 10bit AC3-Vertag_track3_[und]

[♪♪♪]

[CRYING]

[ALARM RINGS]

[TABATHA CRYING]

Sam, the baby is crying.

She probably wants her bottle.

Okay, I'll be a good father
and get it myself.

Darrin, the baby is crying.

She had me up and down
all night long.

So would you mind if just this
once I gave her her bottle by--

You wouldn't?

Aw, thanks.

Samantha.

Samantha, wake up.

Samantha!

What's wrong?

I now have positive proof

that our baby is
a full-blooded witch!

What?

[♪♪♪]

Bye-bye, sweetheart.

Your old man has to go to work.

Darrin.

Hmmm?

You haven't apologized to her

for accusing her
of being a full-blooded witch.

Now you know that's impossible.

Why?
Her mother is a witch.

But you're not.
You're mortal.

So the most she can be
is a half-blooded witch.

You're right.

I apologize.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Good morning.

Oh, hello.

Excuse us for barging in,

but we want to give the baby
a present.

In honor of
being born.

Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Kravitz,
you shouldn't have.

You see, Gladys.

Just because they sent us
an announcement

didn't mean we had to.

Oh, Abner, stop kidding.

He's just kidding.

Well, come on
right in.

Ooh!

Darrin, the Kravitzes brought
Tabatha a present.

Mr. and Mrs. Kravitz,
you shouldn't have.

Oh, don't be silly.
It was our pleasure.

[SQUEALING]
Ooh, she's so pwetty.

Oh, she's so pwetty.

She's the pwettiest
wittle girl!

You're getting pwettier
evewyday!

Gladys, please, no baby talk.

It upsets my stomach worse
than her cooking.

Tell her about the gift, Gladys?

Well, we got,
in the baby's very own name,

one share of stock
in Kapoopsie Woolens.

Oh, that's wonderful!
Darrin isn't that wonderful?

It certainly is.

What's Kapoopsie Woolens?

It's not Kapoopsie,
it's Poughkeepsie,

as in the city of the same name,
Poughkeepsie, New York.

I thought you said Kapoopsie.

I've been a stockholder
in it for 20 years,

in those 20 years the price of
the stock never went down or up.

That's what makes it
a sound investment.

Thank you from both of us.

From all three of us.

[GURGLES]

You're entirely welcome.

We bought it through
my cousin Julius.

If you ever need a good
stock broker, I recommend him.

His name is Cushman,
Julius Cushman.

As a matter of fact, I just
happen to have one of his cards.

"One share of common stock.

"Stockholder's name,
Tabatha Stephens."

[LAUGHS]

Well, Tabatha,

you're a Wall Street tycoon.

[CHATTER]

I don't believe it.

What's the matter, Julius?

A stock that hasn't moved
in 20 years,

just went up six points.

What's the name of it?

Poughkeepsie Woolens.

Poughkeepsie Woolens?

Samantha!

Honey?

Hi, sweetheart.

Hi, darling.

Where's Tabatha?

Oh, she's upstairs. I was just
going to take up her laundry.

Well, I'll go along with you.

As soon as I tell you
what happened today.

At the office?
No, on Wall Street.

Poughkeepsie Woolens,
which opened at $9 per share,

closed at $15 per share.

In other words,
it leaped $6.

How about that?

I bet Tabatha
brought it luck.

That's one way of putting it.

There's another?

Sam, being a devoted mother,

did you use a little witchcraft
to put in the fix?

I most certainly did not.

That would be highly unethical.

Okay.
I'm sorry.

But how do you explain the fact
that after 20 years,

this stock suddenly jumps?

Easy.

After 20 years,
it was probably overdue.

Honey, that isn't the way
the stock market works.

Now, the value of
these stocks depends--

[DING]

Hold everything.
What about your mother?

What about my mother what?

Maybe she used
a little witchcraft

to feather
her granddaughter's nest.

Being highly unethical
wouldn't stop her.

Darrin, be logical.

If mother wanted to feather
her granddaughter's nest,

she would not tamper
with the stock market.

She'd merely whip up

a couple of million
dollars cash.

You're right.

So it wasn't either one of you.

Come on, let's go
see the baby.

Hi, sweetie pie.

Hi, my darling?

You know what, congratulations.

Your stock went up six points.

Sam, did you see that?

She smiled.

Yes, she probably has
a little gas.

No, honey.
She understood me.

I told her her stock went up
six points

and she--
She expressed satisfaction!

How can she possibly
understand you?

She's just a baby.

She is not just a baby,
she's your baby.

Maybe Tabatha did it herself.

Maybe she used her own powers
to influence the stock market.

Darling, we aren't even sure
she has any powers.

We're not sure
that she hasn't.

Well, there's only one way
to find out.

How?

We'll conduct an experiment.

What kind of experiment?

We'll buy a second
share of stock

and see what happens to it.

And we'll make it
very scientific,

we'll let her pick
the stock.

Darling, Tabatha can't read.

She's not old enough.

Just a minute.
Pick a stock, pick a stock.

Pick a stock, darling.
Pick a stock.

Ah-ha!

But she can point.

That's not pointing.

That's playing
with the newspaper.

Nelson Aerodynamics,
closed at $12.

I'll buy her one share tomorrow.

Sweetheart.

Mmm?

Don't you think
it's a little silly

to throw away $12
on something...silly?

No, honey.

We have to find out
if she is or if she isn't.

And this is the only way.

There's another way.

What way?

Wait a year and ask her.

I'll place the order tomorrow
through Mrs. Kravitz's cousin.

Frank, are you familiar
with a dog on the market

called Nelson Aerodynamics?

And how.
It's a real nothing--

Don't tell me
you bought it.

Yep, for my cousin's
neighbor's baby.

And it just went up five points.

Samantha!

Samantha!

Oh, I'll be right out.

I'm just heating
Tabatha's bottle.

[TABATHA GURGLES]

Don't you look at me
so innocently.

Now, I know you don't know
any better,

but you cannot tamper
with the American economy.

I realize it's not your fault,
and I'm not blaming you,

but it's got to stop.

Now, this is very serious,
and it's very complicated,

so I want you to listen closely.

When the stocks act strangely,
the public panics.

And that causes disasters

like the big crash in 1929.

You wouldn't want to throw
your country

into another depression,
would you?

I don't believe it.

I simply don't believe it.

A grown man giving a lecture on
the stock market to a tiny baby.

Sam, this tiny baby made herself
$10 and a half in one day.

Nelson Aerodynamics closed
at 22 and one half.

It did?!

What are you so happy about?

That means
the experiment worked.

It did?
Yes, it did.

That proves that our baby
not only has powers,

but she uses them for her own
selfish personal profit.

Darrin, maybe--

I know, Sam.
It's not her fault,

but somehow she's got to develop
a sense of responsibility.

She's a tiny baby.

I know, that's what makes
it so tough.

Somehow, I've got to
make her realize

the significance of
the national economy.

Oh, my stars.

Oh, Tabatha.

Isn't Daddy funny?

He thinks you've been wheeling
and dealing in the stock market.

How about that?

You sweet adorable baby.

And if you have, be a good girl
and cut it out, huh?

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello.

Good morning, Gladys, Julius.

Well, listen,
I was surprised to hear

that Poughkeepsie went up too.

Look, I'll tell you
why I phoned.

Your neighbor, Mr. Stephens

must have some hot, inside
information on the market.

Yesterday, he bought a stock
that went up

10 and a half points in one day.

So if you want to gamble,

I suggest you get him
to give you a few tips.

Oh. Why, thank you, Julius.
We'll do that.

Thank you for calling.

Listen, give my love
to Henrietta and the parakeets.

Bye.

Bye.

Who called?

Cousin Julius.

Abner, if we play our cards
right, we can get rich.

Did Poughkeepsie go up again?

No. We're going to sell
that stock,

and we're going to buy
what Mr. Stephens tells us.

Julius says he must have
some hot, inside information.

Gladys.

Come on,
let's go talk to him.

Gladys, if I say I refuse
to discuss the subject further

so let's drop it,
what would you do?

I would nag you
so unmercifully,

you'd think I never
nagged you before.

That's what I thought.
Let's go.

All right, Tabatha.

We'll take
your diapers upstairs,

and then it's time
for your bath.

He probably left for work.

Don't ring the bell
until I see if his car is here.

Oh, okay.

You want your dolly
to come too, hmm?

I bet you do.

All right.

As long as I only have
two hands.

[SCREAMS]

The garage is empty.
Let's go home and forget it.

Abner!
Ab-Ab--

I'll take a wild guess.

You saw something so peculiar
it exceeds the boundaries

of man's imagination.

Yes. I saw
the Stephens baby fly.

That's terrific!

Most kids her age
can't even walk.

Oh, Abner, why won't you
ever believe me?

Gladys, where did
the Stephens' baby fly to?

Upstairs, toward her room.

She's probably made
a three-point landing

right in her crib.

Good morning.

Ah!

Good morning.

You're holding the baby
in your arms.

Oh, I do that a lot.

Gladys thought the baby
would be in her room.

Oh, well, she's en route
to get her bath.

Would you mind letting us
come up and watch?

Well, it's not that spectacular,
you know.

Maybe not to you,

but it certainly would
brighten up our drab lives.

Well, to tell you the truth,
I'm still a little nervous.

I'm only a novice,

and I'm not sure I'm ready
for an audience yet.

Oh, that's okay.
We're easy to please.

Okay.

Just remember,
I'm still a beginner.

Abner, since when do you like
to watch babies take baths?

Not babies, Gladys.

Baby.

I want to show you
there's only one, a non-flier.

Yeah?

Oh, thank you.

Yeah.

Oopsie-daisy.
There you go.

Now,
you just relax.

The trick
to bathing a baby

is to get everything
ready in advance.

My cousin says that
Mr. Stephens bought a stock

that went up 10 and a half
points in one day.

Mm-hmm.

Ten and half points?

In one day.

Oh, beginner's luck.

How did Mr. Stephens
pick that stock out?

Oh, just a hunch, I guess.

Maybe Tabatha gave him
a tip on it.

I forgot the soap.
Excuse me.

Gladys, what are you doing?

What's it look like I'm doing,
I'm snooping!

Abner!

Here's today's paper,
folded at the financial page.

So what?

Abner, how can
you be so dense?

Didn't you hear her say
that the baby gave him a tip?

And then we find the paper
in the nursery.

Don't you see?
Like mother like daughter.

Gladys, can you be
more specific?

Well, it's obvious.

Tabatha made that stock go up
10 and a half points by voodoo,

and she did the same thing
for Kapoopsie Woolens.

Gladys, for the last time,
it's not Kapoopsie,

it's Poughkeepsie.

All right.

Now, all we need is the water.

She wants the paper.

Just like kids.

They want to play with
everything but their toys.

She's not playing.

She's picking a stock.

"East South Dakota Petroleum."

She's telling us to buy
East South Dakota Petroleum!

That's funny.
I didn't hear her say a word.

Can't you see?
She's bribing us.

She's telling us,
"Aunt Gladys and Uncle Abner,

"if you'll keep my secret,
I'll make you rich."

You don't have to
make us rich.

We'll keep your secret
if you keep ours.

What's our secret?

That Aunt Gladys is sick
in the head

and needs a thorough
psychiatric examination,

which Uncle Abner is now
going home to arrange.

Abner, wait.

Oh!
Ooh!

Well, that was close,

Ah! Abner!

Wait until I tell you what
Mrs. Stephens did to the water!

I just got home
and saw the sign.

Room for rent?

Out of necessity.

This morning we sold
our Poughkeepsie Woolens

and invested all our money
in East South Dakota Petroleum.

By this afternoon,
it had dropped 21 points.

Oh, no!

Oh, yes. And you haven't heard
the worse part.

My wife says
she invested in the stock

because she got a magic message
from your daughter.

Pathetic, isn't it?

Darrin, don't yell.

You'll wake up the baby.

How can she sleep?

She just destroyed
the life savings

of a sweet middle-aged couple.

You're not making
any sense.

Gladys got a tip from Tabatha,
and the stock went down.

That proves one thing.

What?

If Tabatha gave Mrs. Kravitz
a tip on the stock market,

which you believe she did
and I don't,

Tabatha would've used
her powers,

which you believe she has
and I don't,

to make the stock go up,
not down, as she did before,

which you believe she did
and I don't.

Not necessarily.

Why not?

The stock wasn't purchased
in her name.

Really?

What are you doing,
reporting her to the SEC?

I am ordering her one share
of East South Dakota Petroleum

so tomorrow when it rises,

it takes the Kravitzes
off the hook.

May I speak to
Mr. Julius Cushman, please?

Ah, Mr. Cushman,
Darrin Stephens.

Will you please give me
the closing price

on East South Dakota Petroleum?

With pleasure.

After severe,
early afternoon dip,

East South Dak Pet rallied
to close where it opened,

at $30 per share.

You're kidding.

Um, how come?

I see.

Uh, who told you?

Our Research department.

And while I was at it,

I had them tell me what happened

with Poughkeepsie Woolens
and Nelson Aero.

Uh, what--?
What did happen?

Uh-huh.

Mmm.

Uh-huh.

I see. Well, that's very
interesting, Mr. Cushman.

No, no. I think I'll just
play it cool.

Oh, thank you.

What is interesting?

Well, uh, East South Dakota
Petroleum bounced back,

so, uh, tomorrow the Kravitzes
can sell and break even.

What made it bounce back?

Oh, you wouldn't understand,
honey. It's very dull.

I think I'd find it fascinating.

What happened?

Well, the earlier dip
was caused by, um...

a rumor that a new oil well
failed to strike oil.

Well, they found out
the rumor wasn't true,

and it just bounced back up.

[LAUGHS]

How about Poughkeepsie Woolens?

Honey, how about a martini?

How about letting Tabatha
off the hook?

Okay.

Poughkeepsie Woolens
bounced back

because of the discovery
of a new synthetic fabric.

Oh.

And, uh, how about
Nelson Aerodynamics?

There's no way I can
get out of this?

Nope.

Nelson Aerodynamics went up

because they got
a government contract.

In other words, there were
three logical reasons

for the way the stocks acted.

Tabatha had nothing
to do with it?

You could say that, yes.

I did.

Now you can make me
that martini.

Sam, I just had
a terrible thought.

What?

Supposing it appeared that
there were logical reasons

for the stocks
bouncing around like that.

Supposing she knew
they'd strike oil.
Darrin.

Supposing she knew they
discovered a new synthetic.

Darrin.
Honey, you can't
blame me for wondering.

If you don't stop this,

do you know what's
going to happen?
What?

You're going to turn into
another Gladys Kravitz.

You just cured me.

Thanks.

Alrighty, madam,
let's see what we can do here.

Good morning, ladies.

Oh, good morning, Dada,

Oh, it sure is nice sleeping
in late on Sunday, right?

Oh, well, we ladies
wouldn't know,

we were up at 6:00.

Sam.

Uh-huh?

Is Tabatha up to
her old tricks again?

Hardly.

This is yesterday's sports page,

and I'm using it to line
the wastepaper basket.

Here, honey, look.

She put her finger
on the entries at Aqueduct,

on a...

horse in the first race named,
Princess Jennie.

Darrin, you're not gonna
start that again.

Well, as long as it was
yesterday's paper,

let's just take a look and see.

First race at Aqueduct
was won by...

Dirty Arnold.

Beating Princess Jennie
in a photo finish.

There, you see?

I see.

[DING]

Unless, Princess Jennie
didn't win

because she didn't have
a bet on it.

Darrin, will you please--?

Will you please...?

Yes, Sam, will I please what?

Will you please hold Tabatha

while I finish
lining the wastebasket?

Who do you like in the fourth?

Darrin.

[♪♪♪]