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1
00:00:05,188 --> 00:00:06,688
Morning, sweetheart.
Hello.
2
00:00:06,690 --> 00:00:08,557
Just toast today.
I got another rough one.
3
00:00:08,559 --> 00:00:11,392
Things are really jumping
down at the office.
4
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:20,535
Has the mail come yet?
5
00:00:20,537 --> 00:00:22,904
Well, I haven't...
6
00:00:22,906 --> 00:00:25,206
Yes, it's here.
7
00:00:27,678 --> 00:00:28,844
Mother?
8
00:00:28,846 --> 00:00:30,311
Did you say something, honey?
9
00:00:30,313 --> 00:00:32,614
No, no, sweetheart.
Just mumbling.
10
00:00:36,653 --> 00:00:38,252
Darrin!
Hmm?
11
00:00:38,254 --> 00:00:40,221
My cousin Mario's
getting married!
12
00:00:40,223 --> 00:00:41,823
He's living in Egypt.
13
00:00:41,825 --> 00:00:43,925
It's going to be a big wedding.
14
00:00:43,927 --> 00:00:45,393
That's nice.
15
00:00:45,395 --> 00:00:48,563
His fiancée wants me
to be matron of honor!
16
00:00:48,565 --> 00:00:50,832
Matron of honor
at a wedding in Egypt?
17
00:00:53,370 --> 00:00:56,505
The weather in Cairo is
marvelous this time of year.
18
00:00:56,507 --> 00:00:58,272
I might have known.
19
00:00:58,274 --> 00:01:01,743
Samantha, Mario's fiancée
is simply beautiful,
20
00:01:01,745 --> 00:01:04,345
socially prominent,
one of us, of course.
21
00:01:04,347 --> 00:01:06,515
Wonderful. Well, you be sure
to give them our best,
22
00:01:06,517 --> 00:01:07,983
because Samantha won't be there.
23
00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:10,552
That is ridiculous!
Of course she will!
24
00:01:10,554 --> 00:01:12,120
No, Mother.
25
00:01:12,122 --> 00:01:13,955
Darrin can't get away right now,
26
00:01:13,957 --> 00:01:15,690
and I'm not going
anywhere without him.
27
00:01:15,692 --> 00:01:17,425
You can't mean that.
28
00:01:17,427 --> 00:01:19,060
She certainly can and does.
29
00:01:19,062 --> 00:01:20,261
If she goes anywhere at all
30
00:01:20,263 --> 00:01:22,196
it will be with me,
the old-fashioned way.
31
00:01:22,198 --> 00:01:24,966
You really mean to set
yourself against me?
32
00:01:24,968 --> 00:01:27,602
Well, I prefer to call it
33
00:01:27,604 --> 00:01:30,138
exercising my prerogative
as a husband.
34
00:01:30,140 --> 00:01:32,473
I'll send a note of regret
this afternoon.
35
00:01:32,475 --> 00:01:36,011
That won't be necessary.
I'll take the message myself.
36
00:01:36,013 --> 00:01:40,214
Oh, yes.
Speaking of messages.
37
00:01:40,216 --> 00:01:42,584
I have one for you, young man.
38
00:01:42,586 --> 00:01:43,785
Yes?
39
00:01:43,787 --> 00:01:45,887
You're in trouble.
40
00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:56,297
[♪♪♪]
41
00:02:39,943 --> 00:02:43,011
Well, just fix it, huh?
Just fix it!
42
00:02:43,013 --> 00:02:44,713
All right.
43
00:02:44,715 --> 00:02:46,915
[RINGS]
44
00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:48,683
Hello?
45
00:02:48,685 --> 00:02:52,286
Well, tell him I'm sorry.
I just haven't had time.
46
00:02:52,288 --> 00:02:53,521
Morning, Darrin.
47
00:02:53,523 --> 00:02:56,224
Good morning, Larry.
48
00:02:56,226 --> 00:02:57,291
What time is Woolfe?
49
00:02:57,293 --> 00:02:58,727
Oh... [RINGS]
50
00:02:58,729 --> 00:03:01,896
Oh, for Pete's sake. Yes!
51
00:03:01,898 --> 00:03:04,733
You're darn tootin'
I objected, Carson!
52
00:03:04,735 --> 00:03:06,467
That girl looked like
Sophia Loren.
53
00:03:06,469 --> 00:03:10,304
She's supposed to be
16 years old. All right.
54
00:03:12,909 --> 00:03:14,976
Every advertising
executive in the country
55
00:03:14,978 --> 00:03:16,611
is trying to land
the Woolfe Bros.
56
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:17,846
Department store account,
57
00:03:17,848 --> 00:03:19,247
and I'm supposed to get it
58
00:03:19,249 --> 00:03:21,116
with sketches that look like
59
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:24,519
they came out of
a girlie magazine.
60
00:03:24,521 --> 00:03:26,420
Now, boy, relax.
61
00:03:26,422 --> 00:03:28,723
Uncle Larry has the answer
to all your problems.
62
00:03:28,725 --> 00:03:30,358
Another head.
63
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:31,760
Very funny.
64
00:03:31,762 --> 00:03:34,328
But I was referring, as you
well know, to an assistant.
65
00:03:34,330 --> 00:03:35,864
Come on, Larry.
I've told you.
66
00:03:35,866 --> 00:03:37,799
I just don't have time
to train another man.
67
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:40,035
Delegate authority, Darrin.
That's the secret.
68
00:03:40,037 --> 00:03:41,369
Look, do yourself a favor.
69
00:03:41,371 --> 00:03:43,504
There's a bright young boy
named Gideon Whitsett
70
00:03:43,506 --> 00:03:45,140
down in the
copywriting department.
71
00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:46,374
Give him a chance to help you.
72
00:03:46,376 --> 00:03:47,876
Okay, Larry, okay.
Send him up.
73
00:03:47,878 --> 00:03:49,177
Fine.
74
00:03:49,179 --> 00:03:50,645
Hoping to be
of further service...
75
00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,080
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
76
00:03:52,082 --> 00:03:53,314
Come in.
77
00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,917
I remain, et cetera, et cetera.
78
00:03:57,520 --> 00:03:59,154
Mr. Stephens,
I'm Gideon Whitsett.
79
00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:00,254
I just wanted to tell you
80
00:04:00,256 --> 00:04:01,956
how much this opportunity
means to me.
81
00:04:01,958 --> 00:04:03,357
We're glad to have you aboard.
82
00:04:03,359 --> 00:04:04,926
That's very kind, sir.
83
00:04:04,928 --> 00:04:06,460
You can drop the "sir."
84
00:04:06,462 --> 00:04:08,096
I'm not that much
older than you.
85
00:04:08,098 --> 00:04:11,399
Oh, well, that's true, sir.
I mean, Mr. Stephens.
86
00:04:11,401 --> 00:04:13,968
It just seems that way because
you've already accomplished
87
00:04:13,970 --> 00:04:15,369
everything I've ever dreamed of.
88
00:04:15,371 --> 00:04:18,272
Uh-huh.
89
00:04:18,274 --> 00:04:21,176
We have a meeting
with Mr. Woolfe.
90
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:22,811
I'm sorry I won't
be able to brief you,
91
00:04:22,813 --> 00:04:25,513
but just keep your eye on me,
and play it by ear.
92
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:27,515
Sir, would it be
all right with you
93
00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:29,684
if I took a few notes
while you're talking?
94
00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:31,252
I've got an awful lot to learn,
95
00:04:31,254 --> 00:04:33,221
and you're the man
I want to learn it from.
96
00:04:33,223 --> 00:04:35,957
Oh, sure. Fine.
97
00:04:35,959 --> 00:04:38,559
Mr. Woolfe,
this is our Mr. Stephens.
98
00:04:38,561 --> 00:04:40,061
Oh, so you're
the bright young man
99
00:04:40,063 --> 00:04:41,596
I've been hearing so much about.
100
00:04:41,598 --> 00:04:44,565
No, no, Mr. Woolfe.
This is our Mr. Stephens.
101
00:04:44,567 --> 00:04:47,335
Oh.
How do you do, sir?
102
00:04:47,337 --> 00:04:51,039
And this is Stephens'
assistant, Gideon Whitsett.
103
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,707
Oh, ashtray, sir?
104
00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:55,110
Oh, thank you, Whitsett.
105
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:58,847
Harvard or Yale?
106
00:04:58,849 --> 00:05:01,082
I believe you've got me
spotted already, sir.
107
00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:03,017
[CHUCKLING]
I knew it.
108
00:05:03,019 --> 00:05:06,020
I know a Yale man when
I see one. Best of the breed.
109
00:05:06,022 --> 00:05:08,990
Brackity yax, co-ax, co-ax!
Brackity yax, co-ax, co-ax!
110
00:05:08,992 --> 00:05:10,625
BOTH:
Wahoo, wahoo!
111
00:05:10,627 --> 00:05:12,761
Team, team, team!
112
00:05:12,763 --> 00:05:14,896
Those were the golden days.
113
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,131
LARRY: Yes, indeed.
114
00:05:16,133 --> 00:05:17,832
Mr. Woolfe, why don't you
sit over here?
115
00:05:17,834 --> 00:05:19,433
I'm sure you'll be
more comfortable.
116
00:05:19,435 --> 00:05:20,434
Thank you.
117
00:05:20,436 --> 00:05:21,636
As I was saying,
Mr. Woolfe,
118
00:05:21,638 --> 00:05:22,837
we feel that Stephens here...
119
00:05:22,839 --> 00:05:23,972
Who?
120
00:05:23,974 --> 00:05:27,242
Stephens. Missouri U.
Class of '50.
121
00:05:29,179 --> 00:05:31,379
Now, what I'd like
to emphasize in this campaign
122
00:05:31,381 --> 00:05:33,481
are three major areas...
123
00:05:33,483 --> 00:05:35,850
GIDEON: Sir, would you like
to take a few notes?
124
00:05:35,852 --> 00:05:37,752
Oh, thank you.
125
00:05:39,322 --> 00:05:40,989
The teenage ready-to-wear market
126
00:05:40,991 --> 00:05:43,357
and competing with
the discount companies
127
00:05:43,359 --> 00:05:44,592
in the appliance sales.
128
00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:46,828
Fine material.
I like your tailor.
129
00:05:46,830 --> 00:05:48,729
Worked for our family for years.
130
00:05:48,731 --> 00:05:49,764
Oh, really?
131
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:51,199
Appliance sales.
132
00:05:51,201 --> 00:05:55,503
And updating our approach
to home tailoring.
133
00:05:55,505 --> 00:05:57,839
Uh, home furnishing.
134
00:05:57,841 --> 00:05:59,841
You'll give me his name,
of course?
135
00:06:02,145 --> 00:06:05,046
Now, concentrating
on the first major market,
136
00:06:05,048 --> 00:06:06,747
I'd like to... [HICCUPS]
137
00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:12,520
I'd start with the... [HICCUPS]
138
00:06:14,991 --> 00:06:17,892
I seem to have the hiccups.
139
00:06:17,894 --> 00:06:20,728
Darrin.
Oh, thanks, Larry.
140
00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:30,338
I would, uh, like to call
your attention to
141
00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:32,340
the young lady standing
in the foreground,
142
00:06:32,342 --> 00:06:34,943
young gentleman in the rear,
and the caption might read,
143
00:06:34,945 --> 00:06:36,785
"He'd like to hold your..."
[HICCUPS]
144
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:41,115
"He'd like to hold your..."
[HICCUPS]
145
00:06:41,117 --> 00:06:42,550
They're bad.
146
00:06:42,552 --> 00:06:44,352
Uh, if you'll allow me.
147
00:06:46,723 --> 00:06:48,089
"He'd like to hold your hand
148
00:06:48,091 --> 00:06:50,091
"when you're wearing
your discotheque dress
149
00:06:50,093 --> 00:06:51,359
from Woolfe Bros."
150
00:06:51,361 --> 00:06:53,394
I don't know.
151
00:06:53,396 --> 00:06:57,365
Can't it be phrased in
good old-fashioned English?
152
00:06:57,367 --> 00:06:58,799
Oh, yes, sir, I think it could.
153
00:06:58,801 --> 00:06:59,934
Oh, no, it couldn't!
154
00:06:59,936 --> 00:07:01,702
The teenagers of today
are very keen on...
155
00:07:01,704 --> 00:07:02,704
[HICCUPS]
156
00:07:04,274 --> 00:07:06,707
Why don't we just
call it a party dress?
157
00:07:06,709 --> 00:07:08,176
Now you're talking.
158
00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,011
No, he's not.
159
00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:12,613
Plain and simple.
That's what I like.
160
00:07:12,615 --> 00:07:15,383
You know, Tate, this boy's
got a lot on the ball.
161
00:07:15,385 --> 00:07:17,085
Well, thank you,
Mr. Woolfe.
162
00:07:17,087 --> 00:07:20,021
Well, Gideon, you
and Stephens make a fine team.
163
00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:22,490
Right, Darrin?
164
00:07:22,492 --> 00:07:24,893
[HICCUPS]
165
00:07:24,895 --> 00:07:26,928
It's been a great day.
166
00:07:26,930 --> 00:07:29,397
I'm certainly looking forward
to our cocktail meeting
167
00:07:29,399 --> 00:07:31,032
this evening with Mr. Woolfe.
168
00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:32,700
I bet.
169
00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:33,801
You know, Whitsett,
170
00:07:33,803 --> 00:07:35,770
I was looking over
your personnel file.
171
00:07:35,772 --> 00:07:37,071
You never went to Yale.
172
00:07:37,073 --> 00:07:38,940
Why, no, sir.
I never said I did.
173
00:07:38,942 --> 00:07:41,943
You gave every
impression you did.
174
00:07:44,647 --> 00:07:47,315
Oops.
175
00:07:47,317 --> 00:07:49,583
I-I forgot my briefcase.
176
00:07:49,585 --> 00:07:52,120
Why don't you go ahead,
and I'll meet you there.
177
00:08:01,864 --> 00:08:03,731
[ELEVATOR GRINDS TO A STOP]
178
00:08:07,304 --> 00:08:09,870
FEMALE VOICE:
Your elevator is
temporarily stalled.
179
00:08:09,872 --> 00:08:13,041
Find the red button marked
"emergency" and press.
180
00:08:14,811 --> 00:08:16,911
Why today? Why?
181
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,913
If the elevator does not
start immediately...
182
00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:21,582
This is the moment of truth.
I will not panic.
183
00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:23,551
[SHOUTING]
Help! Let me out of here!
184
00:08:23,553 --> 00:08:26,321
Let me out of here! Help!
185
00:08:26,323 --> 00:08:29,257
Find the red button
marked "emergency" and...
186
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:30,791
Mr. Tate, this is
Gideon Whitsett.
187
00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:33,761
I think Mr. Stephens
has been held up somewhere.
188
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:36,297
You mean he kept
Mr. Woolfe waiting?
189
00:08:36,299 --> 00:08:37,565
I'm afraid so, sir,
190
00:08:37,567 --> 00:08:40,068
but I stepped into the breach,
so to speak.
191
00:08:40,070 --> 00:08:42,003
I took the liberty
of covering for him.
192
00:08:42,005 --> 00:08:44,272
Good for you.
How did it go?
193
00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:47,275
Brilliantly,
if I may say so, sir.
194
00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:49,143
I feel quite confident
that Mr. Woolfe's
195
00:08:49,145 --> 00:08:50,878
going to sign with our agency.
196
00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:54,248
[LAUGHING]
Providing, of course, I give
him the name of my tailor.
197
00:08:54,250 --> 00:08:56,417
Mr. Woolfe seems to think
the world of me, sir.
198
00:08:56,419 --> 00:08:57,751
I don't know why.
199
00:08:57,753 --> 00:09:01,956
I do. You're a very capable
young man. Valuable too.
200
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:05,193
Well, thank you, Mr. Tate.
That means a great deal to me.
201
00:09:05,195 --> 00:09:06,861
Goodbye now, sir.
202
00:09:06,863 --> 00:09:08,096
Goodbye.
203
00:09:12,768 --> 00:09:14,035
Honey, I'm telling you,
204
00:09:14,037 --> 00:09:16,137
from the minute that guy
walked into the office,
205
00:09:16,139 --> 00:09:18,039
it's been one disaster
after another.
206
00:09:18,041 --> 00:09:20,308
Oh, I know, sweetheart.
It's like he jinxed me.
207
00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:23,177
I've never been stuck in
an elevator in my whole life.
208
00:09:23,179 --> 00:09:25,380
That's a terrible experience.
209
00:09:25,382 --> 00:09:28,682
Mother did that to me once...
Say that again.
210
00:09:28,684 --> 00:09:30,718
What?
Your mother...?
211
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:34,489
Oh, no. Now, you can't
blame this on her.
212
00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:39,293
That happens accidentally
sometimes too.
213
00:09:39,295 --> 00:09:41,662
Yeah, I suppose it does.
214
00:09:41,664 --> 00:09:45,066
To normal people
with normal mothers-in-law.
215
00:09:47,237 --> 00:09:48,836
Dar...
216
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:01,182
GIRL: You're late.
217
00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:03,484
I ran out of gas.
Can you believe that?
218
00:10:03,486 --> 00:10:06,454
I know. But I filled
the tank yesterday.
219
00:10:06,456 --> 00:10:08,289
Oh, there you are.
220
00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:09,924
I apologize, gentlemen.
221
00:10:09,926 --> 00:10:12,026
I'm not usually late,
but things keep happening.
222
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:14,762
Never mind, Darrin. Whitsett's
been showing the layouts.
223
00:10:14,764 --> 00:10:16,864
Layouts? But I left
the layouts at home.
224
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:17,965
That's why I had to go back,
225
00:10:17,967 --> 00:10:19,833
and when I went,
I ran out of gas, and...
226
00:10:19,835 --> 00:10:21,835
It's all right, Darrin.
227
00:10:21,837 --> 00:10:24,038
Clever, very clever.
I like your ideas, boy.
228
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,541
Of course, we'll have to make
a few little changes.
229
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,008
WHITSETT:
Anything you say, sir.
230
00:10:28,010 --> 00:10:29,843
Good afternoon, uh... Stephens.
231
00:10:29,845 --> 00:10:31,479
I'd like to explain!
232
00:10:31,481 --> 00:10:33,647
Don't make waves.
233
00:10:33,649 --> 00:10:35,450
Waves?
234
00:10:40,423 --> 00:10:43,291
Why, that thieving, no-good...
235
00:10:43,293 --> 00:10:46,294
Larry, I was up all night
coming up with this.
236
00:10:46,296 --> 00:10:48,629
This is my exact layout!
237
00:10:48,631 --> 00:10:50,298
Which you left at home.
238
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:52,500
Which I left at home.
Therefore, he...
239
00:10:52,502 --> 00:10:56,770
Then how could it...?
How did he...?
240
00:10:56,772 --> 00:10:59,340
Black magic, maybe?
241
00:10:59,342 --> 00:11:02,110
Would you believe me
if I said yes?
242
00:11:02,112 --> 00:11:04,312
Darrin, you're tired.
You need a rest.
243
00:11:04,314 --> 00:11:05,879
You've been working too hard.
244
00:11:05,881 --> 00:11:07,881
I want you to take
the next few days off.
245
00:11:07,883 --> 00:11:08,949
And don't worry.
246
00:11:08,951 --> 00:11:11,519
Gideon has everything
under control.
247
00:11:11,521 --> 00:11:15,223
Yes. And so does Endora.
248
00:11:21,964 --> 00:11:23,864
Endora?
249
00:11:23,866 --> 00:11:26,300
Endora? Come out.
I wanna talk to you.
250
00:11:29,372 --> 00:11:31,239
Endora?
251
00:11:32,442 --> 00:11:34,408
I know you're here somewhere.
252
00:11:34,410 --> 00:11:36,444
Whoo-hoo?
Endora?
253
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:38,746
Darrin?
254
00:11:38,748 --> 00:11:41,482
Darrin, how come
you're home so early?
255
00:11:41,484 --> 00:11:42,883
Mother, dear.
Come out.
256
00:11:42,885 --> 00:11:44,352
Come out, wherever you are.
257
00:11:44,354 --> 00:11:46,320
Darrin, she's not here.
Not now.
258
00:11:46,322 --> 00:11:47,955
Oh, yes, she is.
She's right here.
259
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,723
She's going to make
good her threat.
260
00:11:49,725 --> 00:11:51,825
She's going to replace me
in my job.
261
00:11:51,827 --> 00:11:52,993
Oh, Darrin, you're wrong.
262
00:11:52,995 --> 00:11:54,728
She's had nothing to do
with all of this.
263
00:11:54,730 --> 00:11:56,430
And it won't stop
with just him, either.
264
00:11:56,432 --> 00:11:58,932
Before you know it, the
entire agency will be witches.
265
00:11:58,934 --> 00:12:00,501
Then the building.
Then the street.
266
00:12:00,503 --> 00:12:02,102
Today, Madison Avenue.
267
00:12:02,104 --> 00:12:03,471
Tomorrow, the world.
268
00:12:03,473 --> 00:12:05,039
I know it looks suspicious,
269
00:12:05,041 --> 00:12:07,741
but try to keep an open mind,
for your own sake.
270
00:12:07,743 --> 00:12:10,044
Ah!
Now, wait a minute.
271
00:12:10,046 --> 00:12:12,046
Can you honestly assume
272
00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:14,215
that just because a young man
comes into the office
273
00:12:14,217 --> 00:12:16,050
who happens to be
clever and efficient...?
274
00:12:16,052 --> 00:12:18,252
Efficient? He's a tarantula.
275
00:12:18,254 --> 00:12:20,454
Well, I don't care if
he's the Marquis de Sade.
276
00:12:20,456 --> 00:12:22,122
Just because you've
had some bad luck
277
00:12:22,124 --> 00:12:24,458
does not necessarily
mean he is a witch.
278
00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:26,760
Not witch, Samantha, warlock.
279
00:12:26,762 --> 00:12:29,463
A term with which you and your
relations should be familiar,
280
00:12:29,465 --> 00:12:31,566
like dear old cousin Mario.
281
00:12:33,736 --> 00:12:36,604
Darrin, this is dangerous.
Do you know what's happening?
282
00:12:36,606 --> 00:12:38,038
Funny.
283
00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,608
Napoleon was asked the same
question just before Waterloo.
284
00:12:40,610 --> 00:12:42,009
The way you're talking,
285
00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:44,612
everything bad that happens
to you now is witchcraft, right?
286
00:12:44,614 --> 00:12:48,048
You bet your sweet broomstick!
Just consider the evidence.
287
00:12:48,050 --> 00:12:50,685
Sudden paralyzing inefficiency,
288
00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:53,254
being stuck in elevators,
hiccup attacks,
289
00:12:53,256 --> 00:12:55,089
running out of gas.
290
00:12:55,091 --> 00:12:57,692
With evidence like that,
you should've been at Salem.
291
00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:59,727
Searching for straws, am I?
292
00:12:59,729 --> 00:13:01,562
Well then, how do you
explain the fact
293
00:13:01,564 --> 00:13:03,731
that these layouts
right here on the table
294
00:13:03,733 --> 00:13:05,466
young Whitsett had
at the office today?
295
00:13:05,468 --> 00:13:07,235
Simple.
You discussed it with him.
296
00:13:07,237 --> 00:13:08,436
It could never happen.
297
00:13:08,438 --> 00:13:10,104
I only came up with
the idea last night.
298
00:13:10,106 --> 00:13:11,905
I drew it and left it
here on the table.
299
00:13:11,907 --> 00:13:14,642
And yet he had it
in the office today.
300
00:13:14,644 --> 00:13:16,977
Now, how'd he do that? Huh?
How'd he do it, huh? How?
301
00:13:16,979 --> 00:13:19,813
Darrin Stephens,
you stop yelling at me.
302
00:13:19,815 --> 00:13:21,782
It's a simple case of...
303
00:13:23,453 --> 00:13:24,485
Witchcraft?
304
00:13:42,037 --> 00:13:44,872
Poor, poor Denton.
305
00:13:44,874 --> 00:13:46,540
Uh, Darrin.
306
00:13:46,542 --> 00:13:49,810
For the first time,
I actually feel sorry for you.
307
00:13:49,812 --> 00:13:51,078
So you were here.
308
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,147
As it happens, I just got back.
309
00:13:53,149 --> 00:13:56,817
Oh, it was a beautiful wedding.
310
00:13:56,819 --> 00:13:59,720
I suppose I got
overly sentimental.
311
00:13:59,722 --> 00:14:02,156
I mean, Duncan... Darrin.
312
00:14:02,158 --> 00:14:07,328
Oh, yes. Derwin, you may be
second-rate, but you are family.
313
00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:09,363
What are you talking about?
314
00:14:09,365 --> 00:14:11,532
You are in trouble, aren't you?
315
00:14:11,534 --> 00:14:13,033
Yes.
316
00:14:13,035 --> 00:14:17,104
Well, the only way to break
a spell is with another spell.
317
00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:19,907
Do you mean you're
going to give me something
318
00:14:19,909 --> 00:14:22,543
so I can play on his side
of the court and win?
319
00:14:22,545 --> 00:14:26,980
As I said before,
you are family.
320
00:14:26,982 --> 00:14:29,049
Well, that's great!
321
00:14:29,051 --> 00:14:31,519
Or is it?
322
00:14:31,521 --> 00:14:34,021
How do I know I can trust you?
323
00:14:34,023 --> 00:14:36,490
Suit yourself.
324
00:14:36,492 --> 00:14:40,861
But I'm the only game
in town, aren't I?
325
00:14:42,699 --> 00:14:44,498
Darrin, I hope you know
what you're doing.
326
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:46,900
I don't think this is the time
to make this presentation.
327
00:14:46,902 --> 00:14:48,402
Personally, Mr. Tate,
I was hoping
328
00:14:48,404 --> 00:14:50,705
we'd spend a little more time
talking together
329
00:14:50,707 --> 00:14:52,005
before we met Harrison's...
330
00:14:52,007 --> 00:14:54,475
Mr. Woolfe's
board of directors.
331
00:14:54,477 --> 00:14:56,243
After you, gentlemen.
332
00:15:00,883 --> 00:15:03,283
Gentlemen, our slogan
for the all-important
333
00:15:03,285 --> 00:15:05,619
home furnishing division is...
334
00:15:07,022 --> 00:15:08,155
"Live..."
335
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,223
[CHALK SNAPS]
336
00:15:13,062 --> 00:15:14,428
"Live...
337
00:15:23,639 --> 00:15:26,774
"Live with tomorrow today
338
00:15:26,776 --> 00:15:28,743
The Woolfe Bros.
Time plan way."
339
00:15:28,745 --> 00:15:31,512
Now, our statistics show
that over...
340
00:15:34,049 --> 00:15:35,182
Over...
341
00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:39,453
Seems to be stuck.
342
00:15:39,455 --> 00:15:41,389
Allow me.
343
00:15:46,396 --> 00:15:50,097
That over 38%
of all home furnishing sales
344
00:15:50,099 --> 00:15:52,733
are made on the
time payment plan.
345
00:15:52,735 --> 00:15:54,635
Now, our recommendation
is that such a plan
346
00:15:54,637 --> 00:15:56,236
be inaugurated by Woolfe Bros.
347
00:15:56,238 --> 00:15:59,607
And that that plan be called...
348
00:15:59,609 --> 00:16:01,575
Easy way...
349
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:08,115
Gentlemen, if you'll
just bear with us,
350
00:16:08,117 --> 00:16:10,718
we seem to be having
a few technical difficulties.
351
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:13,020
Are you all right?
[MUTTERING]
352
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:17,925
You actually gave him
something to use?
353
00:16:17,927 --> 00:16:19,126
You tricked him?
354
00:16:19,128 --> 00:16:21,061
Yes, darling,
but it wasn't real magic.
355
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:23,497
I only did it to give him
self-confidence.
356
00:16:23,499 --> 00:16:28,101
It was only baking soda,
ammonia and garlic salt.
357
00:16:28,103 --> 00:16:30,203
In an atomizer. Huh?
358
00:16:33,142 --> 00:16:35,943
Here you see the home
of tomorrow,
359
00:16:35,945 --> 00:16:37,945
as furnished by Woolfe Bros.
360
00:16:37,947 --> 00:16:40,147
Mr. Whitsett.
361
00:16:54,296 --> 00:16:56,697
It's our recommendation
that this scale be built
362
00:16:56,699 --> 00:16:59,967
and used as a mobile
promotional unit.
363
00:16:59,969 --> 00:17:03,471
Designed to arrest the attention
of potential purchasers,
364
00:17:03,473 --> 00:17:08,375
to be shown at decorator's...
home shows, uh...
365
00:17:09,812 --> 00:17:13,080
Say, that thing's got a short.
366
00:17:14,817 --> 00:17:16,884
Mr. Stephens,
it's on fire!
367
00:17:16,886 --> 00:17:18,185
WOOLFE: Fire! Fire!
368
00:17:18,187 --> 00:17:19,720
LARRY: Hold it!
Don't panic, men!
369
00:17:19,722 --> 00:17:21,889
Mr. Stephens, do something!
370
00:17:21,891 --> 00:17:23,724
You bet your life I will!
371
00:17:23,726 --> 00:17:25,726
Something I should have done
a long time ago!
372
00:17:25,728 --> 00:17:26,994
Take that! And that!
373
00:17:26,996 --> 00:17:29,463
Everybody, look out!
Look out, Darrin.
374
00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:31,231
And that!
375
00:17:36,405 --> 00:17:38,372
[MOANING]
376
00:17:41,777 --> 00:17:44,645
How do you feel, sweetheart?
377
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,747
Fine. Just great.
378
00:17:46,749 --> 00:17:49,783
That's good.
Um, Darrin?
379
00:17:49,785 --> 00:17:51,752
Where's your briefcase?
380
00:17:51,754 --> 00:17:54,354
Down in the den. Why?
381
00:17:54,356 --> 00:17:55,823
Larry phoned.
382
00:17:55,825 --> 00:17:58,826
Gideon's coming over to pick up
the Woolfe Bros. file.
383
00:17:58,828 --> 00:18:00,661
That's it, huh?
384
00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:03,130
Just turn in your stripes
and your Woolfe Bros. file
385
00:18:03,132 --> 00:18:04,364
just like that, huh?
386
00:18:04,366 --> 00:18:05,733
Afraid so.
387
00:18:05,735 --> 00:18:07,868
Well, who cares?
Go ahead, give it to him.
388
00:18:07,870 --> 00:18:09,904
Maybe you can exchange
a few witch recipes
389
00:18:09,906 --> 00:18:11,038
while you're at it, huh?
390
00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:12,673
Oh, now.
391
00:18:14,544 --> 00:18:15,609
Maybe.
392
00:18:15,611 --> 00:18:16,877
Huh?
393
00:18:16,879 --> 00:18:17,878
Oh, nothing, darling.
394
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:19,013
[DOORBELL RINGS]
395
00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:20,781
That'll be him.
I'll see you later.
396
00:18:28,223 --> 00:18:29,890
[DOORBELL RINGS]
397
00:18:32,662 --> 00:18:34,327
Hello, Mrs. Stephens.
398
00:18:34,329 --> 00:18:35,696
Mr. Whitsett, isn't it?
399
00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:37,097
Yes, indeed it is.
400
00:18:37,099 --> 00:18:39,700
I hope I haven't come
at an inconvenient time.
401
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:42,736
I just stopped by to pick up
the Woolfe Bros. material.
402
00:18:42,738 --> 00:18:44,538
Yes. It's in the den.
Won't you come in?
403
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,506
Yeah.
404
00:18:46,508 --> 00:18:50,010
Oh, you have a very lovely
place here, Mrs. Stephens.
405
00:18:50,012 --> 00:18:51,712
Happy home, happy marriage.
406
00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:53,380
You can certainly tell
when two people
407
00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:54,882
are suited to one another.
408
00:18:54,884 --> 00:18:56,149
Thank you.
409
00:18:56,151 --> 00:18:58,752
I'm terribly concerned
about Mr. Stephens.
410
00:18:58,754 --> 00:19:00,888
Is he feeling better?
Not much, I'm afraid.
411
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:03,657
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
He's such a wonderful man.
412
00:19:03,659 --> 00:19:05,158
He's my idol.
413
00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:07,561
But I suppose he's already
told you how I feel about him.
414
00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:09,597
Oh, yes, he has.
415
00:19:09,599 --> 00:19:11,031
Well, Mrs. Stephens,
416
00:19:11,033 --> 00:19:14,468
I'm really terribly
grateful to Mr. Stephens.
417
00:19:14,470 --> 00:19:18,238
He's the one who gave me
my first really big opportunity.
418
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,741
You certainly took
advantage, didn't you?
419
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:23,443
Well, I just hope I can measure
up to the standards he's set.
420
00:19:23,445 --> 00:19:27,514
Mr. Whitsett, how do you manage
to be so charming all day long?
421
00:19:27,516 --> 00:19:29,083
It must be exhausting.
422
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:32,219
Oh, no, no, not at all.
I like to please people.
423
00:19:32,221 --> 00:19:35,656
You know what they say.
Catch more flies with honey.
424
00:19:35,658 --> 00:19:38,358
You're just too good to be true.
425
00:19:38,360 --> 00:19:40,794
I wouldn't say that.
I would!
426
00:19:40,796 --> 00:19:44,632
I wish I had the power
to see you as you really are.
427
00:19:44,634 --> 00:19:48,602
If wishes were horses,
beggars would ride.
428
00:19:48,604 --> 00:19:50,804
You gotta step on people
to get where you're going.
429
00:19:50,806 --> 00:19:52,272
You gotta push and shove!
430
00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,374
I guess so.
I know so!
431
00:19:58,347 --> 00:20:00,213
I'm not afraid
to swing my machete
432
00:20:00,215 --> 00:20:01,949
and lop off a few heads.
433
00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,884
That's very courageous.
434
00:20:03,886 --> 00:20:06,754
Most people probably don't know
how hard you work
435
00:20:06,756 --> 00:20:08,255
to really get what you want.
436
00:20:08,257 --> 00:20:11,025
You think I'm underrated?
I'm sure of it.
437
00:20:11,027 --> 00:20:12,960
Have you always been like this?
438
00:20:12,962 --> 00:20:16,664
When I was six years old,
I had 10 kids on paper routes,
439
00:20:16,666 --> 00:20:18,632
and they turned all
the profits over to me.
440
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:19,900
Remarkable!
441
00:20:19,902 --> 00:20:21,802
By the time I was
in college, I was so rich
442
00:20:21,804 --> 00:20:24,204
I hired a flunky
to pass my exams for me
443
00:20:24,206 --> 00:20:28,175
while I concentrated on some
of the more important things.
444
00:20:28,177 --> 00:20:30,210
I was out there
promoting every second.
445
00:20:30,212 --> 00:20:32,046
I'll bet you were.
446
00:20:32,048 --> 00:20:34,314
Cigarette?
Oh, thank you.
447
00:20:36,052 --> 00:20:37,651
[CLICKING]
448
00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:40,420
Oh, go ahead. It's just
the two of us. Be yourself.
449
00:20:40,422 --> 00:20:41,689
Hmm?
450
00:20:41,691 --> 00:20:43,490
Light the cigarette our way.
451
00:20:45,061 --> 00:20:46,994
"Our way?" I don't get you.
452
00:20:46,996 --> 00:20:49,163
The table lighter doesn't work.
453
00:20:49,165 --> 00:20:50,664
Oh, well, have you got a light?
454
00:20:50,666 --> 00:20:51,899
Certainly!
455
00:20:51,901 --> 00:20:54,702
Ooh! What is it
with you people and fire?
456
00:20:54,704 --> 00:20:57,104
Oh, I am sorry,
but accidents will happen.
457
00:20:57,106 --> 00:20:59,306
Now, you do all these
wonderful things yourself?
458
00:20:59,308 --> 00:21:01,408
Oh, you said it, baby.
459
00:21:01,410 --> 00:21:03,276
With no supernatural help?
460
00:21:03,278 --> 00:21:05,746
Oh, no. No supernatural,
natural or otherwise.
461
00:21:05,748 --> 00:21:08,215
It's kill or be killed.
It's a rough world, baby.
462
00:21:08,217 --> 00:21:10,250
You gotta be the firstest
with the mostest.
463
00:21:10,252 --> 00:21:12,352
You know what I mean?
SAMANTHA: Play the angles.
464
00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:15,622
The angles. Of which I'm happy
to say, you have none.
465
00:21:15,624 --> 00:21:17,891
But you have.
466
00:21:17,893 --> 00:21:20,527
Like fixing the exhibit
so it would fall apart.
467
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:21,762
You've been peeking.
468
00:21:21,764 --> 00:21:23,230
And stalling elevators.
469
00:21:23,232 --> 00:21:25,232
Oh, now, how would
I have done that?
470
00:21:25,234 --> 00:21:27,868
Well, you couldn't, could you?
471
00:21:27,870 --> 00:21:31,438
Well, sometimes it works
and sometimes it doesn't.
472
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:35,175
Pushing all the buttons
with "hold" at the same time.
473
00:21:36,879 --> 00:21:40,580
Oh, that's very clever!
474
00:21:40,582 --> 00:21:42,382
I bet you could work magic.
475
00:21:42,384 --> 00:21:44,151
You better believe it.
476
00:21:44,153 --> 00:21:46,419
Otherwise, how would you
have had the same layout
477
00:21:46,421 --> 00:21:48,555
at the office that Darrin
left here at home?
478
00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:50,690
I'm a winner, baby.
I keep telling you.
479
00:21:50,692 --> 00:21:53,994
♪ Ba-da-loo, boop, boodle
Doodle, doodle-doo ♪
480
00:21:53,996 --> 00:21:55,863
Doodling!
481
00:21:55,865 --> 00:21:59,233
Darrin doodles all the time
while he talks on the phone.
482
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,001
He drew that layout
the day before
483
00:22:01,003 --> 00:22:02,369
and didn't even know it, did he!
484
00:22:02,371 --> 00:22:05,172
Wars have been won
from wastepaper baskets, baby.
485
00:22:08,010 --> 00:22:09,643
Stephens!
486
00:22:09,645 --> 00:22:11,285
A slip of the lip
can sink a ship.
487
00:22:18,487 --> 00:22:20,487
You know, I don't
believe he is a witch.
488
00:22:20,489 --> 00:22:23,157
You know, I believe
you're right.
489
00:22:27,562 --> 00:22:29,629
Darrin, these sketches
are brilliant.
490
00:22:29,631 --> 00:22:32,099
Thanks, Larry.
I hope Mr. Woolfe agrees.
491
00:22:32,101 --> 00:22:35,535
Well, yes.
Then again, no.
492
00:22:35,537 --> 00:22:37,805
Say, where's young Whitsett?
He knows what I want.
493
00:22:37,807 --> 00:22:40,274
Young Whitsett is back
sharpening pencils.
494
00:22:40,276 --> 00:22:41,574
Oh, incidentally,
495
00:22:41,576 --> 00:22:44,077
his approach to what you say
you want is dead wrong.
496
00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:48,215
And suppose I want things
done my way?
497
00:22:48,217 --> 00:22:50,217
Then you'd better go
to another agency.
498
00:22:50,219 --> 00:22:52,319
Of course you told the
last one what you wanted
499
00:22:52,321 --> 00:22:55,655
and your sales dropped,
um, 23 percent, I believe.
500
00:22:55,657 --> 00:22:58,325
Twenty four. So?
501
00:22:58,327 --> 00:23:00,760
So if you want a well-planned,
professional campaign,
502
00:23:00,762 --> 00:23:02,796
stressing the approach
that you need,
503
00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:04,832
then start listening
to what you're paying for
504
00:23:04,834 --> 00:23:07,301
and stop telling the doctor
how to practice.
505
00:23:09,071 --> 00:23:12,105
Okay. I never argue
with figures.
506
00:23:13,508 --> 00:23:16,310
Talk, Missouri U. Talk.
507
00:23:21,183 --> 00:23:24,218
All it took was
a little self-confidence.
508
00:23:25,354 --> 00:23:27,354
To you.
509
00:23:27,356 --> 00:23:28,555
You beautiful witch.
510
00:23:28,557 --> 00:23:30,390
Thank you, sweetheart.
Oh, more brandy?
511
00:23:30,392 --> 00:23:33,126
Mmm. No, thanks.
512
00:23:33,128 --> 00:23:36,663
Just plain old-fashioned
insecurity and I nearly flipped.
513
00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,832
Can you believe that?
Happens all the time.
514
00:23:38,834 --> 00:23:40,968
Well, he saw it, and he used it.
515
00:23:40,970 --> 00:23:43,303
No witchcraft, no black magic.
516
00:23:43,305 --> 00:23:46,673
Just an unscrupulous kid
and me working against myself.
517
00:23:46,675 --> 00:23:49,943
Mother's often said that mortals
are their own worst enemies.
518
00:23:49,945 --> 00:23:51,912
You just said the one word
I don't like to hear.
519
00:23:51,914 --> 00:23:54,281
Enemies?
Mother.
520
00:23:54,283 --> 00:23:57,784
Now, darling,
try to forgive her.
521
00:23:57,786 --> 00:24:00,988
She only gave you
what you asked for.
522
00:24:00,990 --> 00:24:05,592
Besides, I'm afraid I said some
pretty nasty things to her.
523
00:24:05,594 --> 00:24:08,262
You did?
Mmm. This morning.
524
00:24:08,264 --> 00:24:10,898
She was so upset she vowed
she'd never come back.
525
00:24:10,900 --> 00:24:12,332
Really?
526
00:24:12,334 --> 00:24:13,967
You mean we're finally
rid of your...
527
00:24:13,969 --> 00:24:15,402
[HICCUPS]
528
00:24:15,404 --> 00:24:16,736
We're finally rid of your...
529
00:24:16,738 --> 00:24:17,837
[HICCUPS]
530
00:24:19,474 --> 00:24:20,774
Oh, dear.
531
00:24:20,776 --> 00:24:22,943
Do you think
she really meant that...
[HICCUPS]
532
00:24:22,945 --> 00:24:25,112
Well, I was positive that...
533
00:24:25,114 --> 00:24:26,446
That...
534
00:24:27,917 --> 00:24:29,116
[SNEEZES]
535
00:24:29,118 --> 00:24:31,618
ENDORA: Gesundheit.
536
00:24:31,620 --> 00:24:36,123
[ENDORA LAUGHING]
537
00:24:43,532 --> 00:24:46,466
[♪♪♪]
38784
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