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Webvtt
X-timestamp-map=local:00:00:00.000,mpegts:9000
00:00:04.971 --> 00:00:08.942 line:10% position:35% size:50%
[ thunder crashing ]
00:00:09.008 --> 00:00:10.944 line:10% position:35% size:50%
[ drilling, sawing ]
00:00:16.049 --> 00:00:18.051 line:10% position:43% size:63%
[ electricity crackling ]
00:00:18.118 --> 00:00:19.953 line:10% position:28% size:35%
>> it's alive!
00:00:38.405 --> 00:00:40.740 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> johnny 5 is alive!
00:00:40.807 --> 00:00:44.043 line:85% position:33% size:45%
Johnny 5 is alive!
00:00:44.110 --> 00:00:46.813 line:85% position:45% size:70%
What will johnny 5 do first?
00:00:46.880 --> 00:00:48.815 line:85% position:45% size:68%
[ upbeat '80s music plays ]
00:00:51.050 --> 00:00:53.019 line:85% position:30% size:38%
>> I'm thirsty!
00:00:53.086 --> 00:00:55.288 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> I'm hungry!
00:00:55.355 --> 00:00:56.356 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> I'm batman.
00:00:56.423 --> 00:00:58.458 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> the night my car careened off
00:00:58.525 --> 00:01:00.059 line:85% position:45% size:70%
That mississippi highway and
00:01:00.126 --> 00:01:01.761 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Flipped into a ditch is a night
00:01:01.828 --> 00:01:02.896 line:85% position:33% size:45%
I'll never forget.
00:01:02.962 --> 00:01:04.464 line:85% position:45% size:70%
To be fair, I don't remember
00:01:04.531 --> 00:01:06.199 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Much about the accident itself,
00:01:06.266 --> 00:01:07.834 line:85% position:48% size:73%
'cause I was banged up pretty
00:01:07.901 --> 00:01:08.601 line:85% position:15% size:10%
Bad.
00:01:08.668 --> 00:01:10.170 line:85% position:50% size:80%
There was much speculation as to
00:01:10.236 --> 00:01:11.404 line:85% position:38% size:53%
What occurred on that
00:01:11.471 --> 00:01:13.239 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Unseasonably cold august night,
00:01:13.306 --> 00:01:15.108 line:85% position:50% size:80%
But the most common thing I hear
00:01:15.175 --> 00:01:16.976 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Is, "Morgan freeman, you've been
00:01:17.043 --> 00:01:18.945 line:85% position:48% size:75%
In more than 75 feature-length
00:01:19.012 --> 00:01:19.712 line:85% position:18% size:15%
Films.
00:01:19.779 --> 00:01:21.581 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Why on god's green earth do you
00:01:21.648 --> 00:01:24.384 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Drive a 1997 nissan maxima?"
00:01:24.451 --> 00:01:26.186 line:85% position:50% size:78%
And for that question, like all
00:01:26.252 --> 00:01:28.021 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Questions, there's more than one
00:01:28.087 --> 00:01:28.621 line:85% position:20% size:18%
Answer.
00:01:28.688 --> 00:01:29.923 line:85% position:38% size:53%
You see, a '97 maxima
00:01:29.989 --> 00:01:31.424 line:85% position:43% size:63%
Represented a significant
00:01:31.491 --> 00:01:33.126 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Improvement over the previous
00:01:33.193 --> 00:01:34.027 line:85% position:28% size:33%
Year's model.
00:01:34.093 --> 00:01:35.528 line:85% position:38% size:55%
And compared to my '89
00:01:35.595 --> 00:01:37.597 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Ford probe, well, it wasn't even
00:01:37.664 --> 00:01:38.698 line:85% position:30% size:38%
A fair contest.
00:01:38.765 --> 00:01:40.333 line:85% position:45% size:70%
In 2002, there was a factory
00:01:40.400 --> 00:01:42.101 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Recall on the alternator, but I
00:01:42.168 --> 00:01:43.770 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Brought it right in, and they
00:01:43.837 --> 00:01:45.171 line:85% position:40% size:60%
Fixed it in a day or so.
00:01:45.238 --> 00:01:46.873 line:85% position:48% size:73%
They even gave me a loaner, a
00:01:46.940 --> 00:01:47.941 line:85% position:33% size:43%
Brand-new altima.
00:01:48.007 --> 00:01:49.642 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Nice car, but it's certainly no
00:01:49.709 --> 00:01:50.376 line:85% position:20% size:18%
Maxima.
00:01:50.443 --> 00:01:51.778 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Oh, oh, and that right there?
00:01:51.845 --> 00:01:53.513 line:85% position:50% size:80%
That's the flip that should have
00:01:53.580 --> 00:01:54.881 line:85% position:40% size:60%
Killed me, but thanks to
00:01:54.948 --> 00:01:56.616 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Nissan's five-star crash rating,
00:01:56.683 --> 00:01:58.017 line:85% position:43% size:63%
Along with dual air bags,
00:01:58.084 --> 00:01:59.319 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Crumple zone, seat-belt
00:01:59.385 --> 00:02:00.920 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Pre-tensioners, and side-door
00:02:00.987 --> 00:02:02.856 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Beams, well, I'm alive today.
00:02:02.922 --> 00:02:04.824 line:85% position:48% size:75%
I suppose the other noteworthy
00:02:04.891 --> 00:02:06.693 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Aspect of this story is I've
00:02:06.759 --> 00:02:08.061 line:85% position:35% size:48%
Been [bleep] My own
00:02:08.127 --> 00:02:09.896 line:85% position:35% size:48%
Step-granddaughter.
00:02:11.764 --> 00:02:12.966 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> it seems like a form of
00:02:13.032 --> 00:02:14.067 line:85% position:38% size:53%
Hysterical blindness.
00:02:14.133 --> 00:02:15.201 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Has he been through any
00:02:15.268 --> 00:02:16.402 line:85% position:40% size:60%
Traumatic events lately?
00:02:16.469 --> 00:02:17.737 line:85% position:45% size:68%
Perhaps seen something that
00:02:17.804 --> 00:02:19.472 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Could have caused this?
00:02:19.539 --> 00:02:21.841 line:10% position:45% size:68%
>> not that I can think of.
00:02:30.650 --> 00:02:32.185 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> I can't believe you gave up
00:02:32.252 --> 00:02:33.286 line:85% position:35% size:48%
Your powers for me.
00:02:33.353 --> 00:02:36.389 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> I...Love you, lois.
00:02:42.161 --> 00:02:43.696 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> I don't know what to say.
00:02:43.763 --> 00:02:46.466 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> I love you, lana.
00:02:46.533 --> 00:02:48.001 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> superman...Man of steel.
00:02:48.067 --> 00:02:49.669 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> so, I come out of the booth
00:02:49.736 --> 00:02:51.437 line:85% position:50% size:80%
All hunched and kind of woozy on
00:02:51.504 --> 00:02:53.039 line:85% position:48% size:73%
My feet like this, like, "Oh,
00:02:53.106 --> 00:02:53.606 line:85% position:15% size:10%
Oh."
00:02:53.673 --> 00:02:54.641 line:85% position:35% size:48%
And then bam! Boom!
00:02:54.707 --> 00:02:55.808 line:85% position:35% size:50%
Kneel before my rod.
00:02:55.875 --> 00:02:57.010 line:85% position:35% size:50%
How about that, huh?
00:02:57.076 --> 00:02:58.778 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> I'm fast, player, but you the
00:02:58.845 --> 00:02:59.412 line:85% position:20% size:20%
Fastest.
00:02:59.479 --> 00:03:00.880 line:85% position:43% size:65%
Bam! Right up in that ass.
00:03:00.947 --> 00:03:02.916 line:85% position:23% size:23%
Oh, yeah!
00:03:09.289 --> 00:03:11.424 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> I-I can't believe you did
00:03:11.491 --> 00:03:12.792 line:85% position:25% size:30%
That for me.
00:03:12.859 --> 00:03:16.729 line:85% position:23% size:25%
[ crying ]
00:03:16.796 --> 00:03:18.364 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> ♪ ba-da-boop, ba-da-boop ♪
00:03:18.431 --> 00:03:19.532 line:85% position:23% size:23%
Superman.
00:03:19.599 --> 00:03:21.534 line:85% position:45% size:68%
[ upbeat '80s music plays ]
00:03:30.043 --> 00:03:30.677 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> dad!
00:03:30.743 --> 00:03:32.078 line:85% position:45% size:70%
It's okay if I call you dad,
00:03:32.145 --> 00:03:33.246 line:85% position:35% size:50%
Right, mr. Drummond?
00:03:33.313 --> 00:03:34.080 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> of course.
00:03:34.147 --> 00:03:35.548 line:85% position:43% size:65%
Why would that make anyone
00:03:35.615 --> 00:03:36.382 line:85% position:28% size:35%
Uncomfortable?
00:03:36.449 --> 00:03:37.884 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> dudley and I want to spend
00:03:37.951 --> 00:03:39.452 line:85% position:50% size:78%
The afternoon at the bike shop.
00:03:39.519 --> 00:03:40.253 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> all alone?
00:03:40.320 --> 00:03:41.187 line:85% position:30% size:40%
I don't like it.
00:03:41.254 --> 00:03:42.055 line:85% position:30% size:38%
>> please, dad?
00:03:42.121 --> 00:03:43.890 line:85% position:50% size:80%
I'll do all my chores this week.
00:03:43.957 --> 00:03:45.091 line:85% position:35% size:48%
I'll be your slave.
00:03:45.158 --> 00:03:46.492 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> oh, now, arnold, our
00:03:46.559 --> 00:03:48.361 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Relationship as father/son in no
00:03:48.428 --> 00:03:50.096 line:85% position:48% size:75%
Ways resembles the owner/slave
00:03:50.163 --> 00:03:51.898 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Dynamic of yes-- you know what?
00:03:51.965 --> 00:03:53.032 line:85% position:20% size:20%
Just go.
00:03:53.099 --> 00:03:54.133 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> bottoms up, boys.
00:03:54.200 --> 00:03:55.702 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> I-I don't think my dad would
00:03:55.768 --> 00:03:56.903 line:85% position:38% size:55%
Like me drinking wine.
00:03:56.970 --> 00:03:58.338 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> arnold, I'm a middle-aged
00:03:58.404 --> 00:03:59.105 line:85% position:23% size:25%
White man.
00:03:59.172 --> 00:04:00.640 line:85% position:50% size:80%
I automatically know what's best
00:04:00.707 --> 00:04:01.207 line:85% position:20% size:20%
For you.
00:04:01.274 --> 00:04:03.176 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> you do sound like
00:04:03.242 --> 00:04:05.545 line:85% position:28% size:33%
Mr. Drummond.
00:04:05.612 --> 00:04:10.149 line:85% position:35% size:48%
[ telephone rings ]
00:04:10.216 --> 00:04:10.917 line:85% position:15% size:10%
Dad.
00:04:10.984 --> 00:04:12.285 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> arnold? Where have you been?
00:04:12.352 --> 00:04:14.053 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> dad, I don't know what to do.
00:04:14.120 --> 00:04:15.822 line:85% position:50% size:78%
The maytag repairman is showing
00:04:15.888 --> 00:04:16.956 line:85% position:33% size:45%
Me naked cartoons.
00:04:17.023 --> 00:04:18.591 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> I want you to listen very
00:04:18.658 --> 00:04:19.325 line:85% position:23% size:25%
Carefully.
00:04:19.392 --> 00:04:20.994 line:85% position:48% size:73%
What comes next is important.
00:04:21.060 --> 00:04:22.662 line:85% position:48% size:73%
He's going to ask you to play
00:04:22.729 --> 00:04:24.330 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Tarzan, and dudley's going to be
00:04:24.397 --> 00:04:25.064 line:85% position:20% size:20%
Into it.
00:04:25.131 --> 00:04:26.432 line:85% position:48% size:73%
The audience might laugh, but
00:04:26.499 --> 00:04:27.333 line:85% position:30% size:38%
It's not funny.
00:04:27.400 --> 00:04:28.835 line:85% position:45% size:70%
They're just confused by the
00:04:28.901 --> 00:04:30.036 line:85% position:38% size:55%
Massive shift in tone.
00:04:30.103 --> 00:04:31.638 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> what exactly are you getting
00:04:31.704 --> 00:04:32.238 line:85% position:20% size:20%
At, dad?
00:04:32.305 --> 00:04:34.874 line:85% position:18% size:15%
Aaaah!
00:04:34.941 --> 00:04:37.210 line:85% position:40% size:58%
>> [ breathing deeply ]
00:04:37.276 --> 00:04:38.578 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> I don't know who you are.
00:04:38.645 --> 00:04:39.912 line:85% position:45% size:68%
I don't know what you want.
00:04:39.979 --> 00:04:41.414 line:85% position:50% size:78%
If you're looking for ransom, I
00:04:41.481 --> 00:04:42.982 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Can tell you I'm a man of means.
00:04:43.049 --> 00:04:44.417 line:85% position:48% size:75%
I probably shouldn't have told
00:04:44.484 --> 00:04:45.184 line:85% position:23% size:23%
You that.
00:04:45.251 --> 00:04:46.519 line:85% position:50% size:78%
If you return my son, that will
00:04:46.586 --> 00:04:47.453 line:85% position:33% size:43%
Be the end of it.
00:04:47.520 --> 00:04:48.988 line:85% position:50% size:80%
But if you keep him, I will find
00:04:49.055 --> 00:04:50.390 line:85% position:45% size:70%
You and I will awkwardly ask
00:04:50.456 --> 00:04:51.557 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Parents to have a frank
00:04:51.624 --> 00:04:52.992 line:85% position:48% size:75%
Discussion with their children
00:04:53.059 --> 00:04:54.427 line:85% position:48% size:73%
About what they've just seen.
00:04:54.494 --> 00:05:00.800 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> good luck.
00:05:00.867 --> 00:05:02.268 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> what do you want? Money?
00:05:02.335 --> 00:05:03.736 line:85% position:45% size:68%
It's not much, but take it!
00:05:03.803 --> 00:05:05.271 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> don't matter what you got!
00:05:05.338 --> 00:05:06.005 line:85% position:25% size:28%
Not a lot?!
00:05:06.072 --> 00:05:06.939 line:85% position:23% size:23%
So what?!
00:05:07.006 --> 00:05:09.876 line:85% position:38% size:53%
[ audience laughing ]
00:05:10.343 --> 00:05:11.878 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> and this is my sister,
00:05:11.944 --> 00:05:12.812 line:85% position:25% size:30%
Rainbow dim.
00:05:12.879 --> 00:05:14.480 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> 9/11 was an inside job.
00:05:14.547 --> 00:05:16.482 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> oh, sure it was.
00:05:16.549 --> 00:05:18.284 line:85% position:38% size:53%
[ dance music plays ]
00:05:18.351 --> 00:05:19.485 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> hey, do I know you?
00:05:19.552 --> 00:05:20.219 line:85% position:25% size:28%
>> not yet.
00:05:20.286 --> 00:05:21.821 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> you want to get out of here?
00:05:21.888 --> 00:05:24.290 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> absolutely.
00:05:24.357 --> 00:05:27.393 line:85% position:23% size:25%
[ groans ]
00:05:27.460 --> 00:05:28.161 line:85% position:15% size:10%
Hey!
00:05:28.227 --> 00:05:30.229 line:85% position:50% size:80%
You stole my kidney, didn't you?
00:05:30.296 --> 00:05:31.631 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> oh, you got me.
00:05:31.698 --> 00:05:32.699 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ chuckles ]
00:05:32.765 --> 00:05:34.467 line:85% position:40% size:60%
I guess I'm the asshole.
00:05:34.534 --> 00:05:37.136 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> well, look at the mirror.
00:05:37.203 --> 00:05:38.504 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ wah-wah! ]
00:05:38.571 --> 00:05:40.306 line:85% position:20% size:18%
>> you?
00:05:40.373 --> 00:05:42.175 line:85% position:28% size:35%
[ both laugh ]
00:05:42.241 --> 00:05:44.010 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> well, good luck selling
that
00:05:44.077 --> 00:05:44.610 line:85% position:20% size:18%
Kidney.
00:05:44.677 --> 00:05:46.446 line:85% position:28% size:35%
[ both laugh ]
00:05:46.512 --> 00:05:48.448 line:85% position:45% size:68%
[ upbeat '80s music plays ]
00:05:54.320 --> 00:05:56.255 line:85% position:28% size:33%
[ gun cocks ]
00:05:58.791 --> 00:06:00.793 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> and when I looked outside,
00:06:00.860 --> 00:06:04.197 line:85% position:48% size:75%
There on the door handle was a
00:06:04.263 --> 00:06:05.465 line:85% position:18% size:13%
Hook!
00:06:05.531 --> 00:06:06.799 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> and that's how I met your
00:06:06.866 --> 00:06:07.266 line:85% position:20% size:18%
Mother.
00:06:07.333 --> 00:06:08.000 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ clanking ]
00:06:08.067 --> 00:06:09.302 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> condoms reduce the risk of
00:06:09.368 --> 00:06:10.636 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Pregnancy and stds, but only
00:06:10.703 --> 00:06:13.339 line:85% position:35% size:48%
When used properly.
00:06:13.406 --> 00:06:14.540 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> ♪ fruity fables ♪
00:06:14.607 --> 00:06:15.675 line:85% position:33% size:43%
♪ fruity fables ♪
00:06:15.742 --> 00:06:17.043 line:85% position:38% size:53%
[ children laughing ]
00:06:17.110 --> 00:06:17.777 line:85% position:23% size:23%
>> barry!
00:06:17.844 --> 00:06:18.745 line:85% position:28% size:35%
Just where the
00:06:18.811 --> 00:06:20.613 line:85% position:50% size:78%
H-e-c-letter-that-comes-after-j
00:06:20.680 --> 00:06:21.581 line:85% position:28% size:35%
Have you been?
00:06:21.647 --> 00:06:23.516 line:85% position:30% size:40%
>> oh, just out.
00:06:23.583 --> 00:06:24.584 line:85% position:18% size:13%
Oops!
00:06:24.650 --> 00:06:26.552 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> we talked about this, barry.
00:06:26.619 --> 00:06:28.521 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Your sex-education job violates
00:06:28.588 --> 00:06:30.156 line:85% position:43% size:63%
Everything we believe in.
00:06:30.223 --> 00:06:31.758 line:85% position:40% size:60%
>> you don't understand.
00:06:31.824 --> 00:06:34.060 line:85% position:43% size:65%
God came to me in a dream.
00:06:34.127 --> 00:06:36.929 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> barry, you must continue
00:06:36.996 --> 00:06:38.865 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Teaching sex education!
00:06:38.931 --> 00:06:41.367 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> but, god, arthur says sex ed
00:06:41.434 --> 00:06:42.268 line:85% position:20% size:20%
Is evil.
00:06:42.335 --> 00:06:44.337 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> arthur can eat my ass.
00:06:44.403 --> 00:06:46.305 line:85% position:48% size:75%
What is the most evil thing in
00:06:46.372 --> 00:06:47.140 line:85% position:23% size:25%
The world?
00:06:47.206 --> 00:06:48.141 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> abortions?
00:06:48.207 --> 00:06:49.942 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> what leads to abortions?
00:06:50.009 --> 00:06:50.943 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> pregnancy?
00:06:51.010 --> 00:06:52.745 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> what prevents pregnancy?
00:06:52.812 --> 00:06:53.746 line:85% position:28% size:33%
>> holy crap!
00:06:53.813 --> 00:06:55.481 line:85% position:43% size:65%
Condoms prevent pregnancy!
00:06:55.548 --> 00:06:56.783 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> damn it, barry!
00:06:56.849 --> 00:06:58.584 line:85% position:45% size:68%
Opposing sex ed is way more
00:06:58.651 --> 00:07:00.253 line:85% position:43% size:63%
Important than abortions.
00:07:00.319 --> 00:07:01.053 line:85% position:23% size:23%
>> what?!
00:07:01.120 --> 00:07:02.889 line:85% position:45% size:70%
>> I don't care if there's a
00:07:02.955 --> 00:07:04.290 line:85% position:33% size:45%
Billion abortions.
00:07:04.357 --> 00:07:06.425 line:85% position:48% size:75%
I just can't stand the thought
00:07:06.492 --> 00:07:08.060 line:85% position:38% size:55%
Of teenagers doing it.
00:07:08.127 --> 00:07:09.529 line:85% position:40% size:58%
Those taut, firm bodies
00:07:09.595 --> 00:07:11.330 line:85% position:48% size:75%
Exploring one another with the
00:07:11.397 --> 00:07:13.065 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Kind of excitement that I'll
00:07:13.132 --> 00:07:14.767 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Never experience again in my
00:07:14.834 --> 00:07:15.501 line:85% position:18% size:13%
Life.
00:07:15.568 --> 00:07:17.103 line:85% position:48% size:75%
And even if I try to recapture
00:07:17.170 --> 00:07:18.971 line:85% position:50% size:78%
My youth with a willing -- mind
00:07:19.038 --> 00:07:20.439 line:85% position:40% size:58%
You, willing -- teenage
00:07:20.506 --> 00:07:21.908 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Participant, I go to prison?!
00:07:21.974 --> 00:07:23.509 line:85% position:50% size:80%
You know what they do in prison,
00:07:23.576 --> 00:07:24.210 line:85% position:18% size:15%
Barry?
00:07:24.277 --> 00:07:25.411 line:85% position:45% size:70%
There's a thing called salad
00:07:25.478 --> 00:07:26.145 line:85% position:20% size:20%
Tossing.
00:07:26.212 --> 00:07:27.513 line:85% position:48% size:75%
Well, I'm not going to prison,
00:07:27.580 --> 00:07:28.147 line:85% position:18% size:15%
Barry.
00:07:28.214 --> 00:07:29.849 line:85% position:40% size:60%
I'm not going to prison!
00:07:29.916 --> 00:07:31.818 line:85% position:30% size:38%
Attica! Attica!
00:07:31.884 --> 00:07:34.153 line:85% position:23% size:25%
>> arthur!
00:07:34.220 --> 00:07:36.055 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> let's go have sex, baby.
00:07:36.122 --> 00:07:37.290 line:85% position:20% size:20%
>> okay.
00:07:37.356 --> 00:07:38.858 line:85% position:33% size:45%
[ crying ] Oh, no.
00:07:38.925 --> 00:07:40.326 line:85% position:33% size:43%
I'm sorry, jesus.
00:07:40.393 --> 00:07:41.727 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> ♪ fruity fables ♪
00:07:41.794 --> 00:07:42.728 line:85% position:33% size:43%
♪ fruity fables ♪
00:07:42.795 --> 00:07:44.564 line:85% position:38% size:53%
[ children laughing ]
00:07:44.630 --> 00:07:46.833 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> these americans butcher my
00:07:46.899 --> 00:07:49.302 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Men like -- well, like I butcher
00:07:49.368 --> 00:07:51.304 line:85% position:23% size:23%
Der jews.
00:07:51.370 --> 00:07:52.538 line:85% position:33% size:45%
Did they mark you?
00:07:52.605 --> 00:07:53.940 line:85% position:38% size:53%
>> yes, mein fuehrer.
00:07:54.006 --> 00:07:56.642 line:85% position:28% size:35%
>> let me see.
00:07:56.709 --> 00:07:58.778 line:85% position:48% size:75%
What the hell is this supposed
00:07:58.845 --> 00:08:00.179 line:85% position:33% size:45%
To be, a swastika?
00:08:00.246 --> 00:08:02.348 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> I think it's the glaive from
00:08:02.415 --> 00:08:04.116 line:85% position:20% size:20%
"Krull."
00:08:04.183 --> 00:08:06.986 line:85% position:25% size:30%
>> reaterdz!
00:08:07.053 --> 00:08:08.588 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> I'm putting together a
00:08:08.654 --> 00:08:09.522 line:85% position:28% size:33%
Special team.
00:08:09.589 --> 00:08:11.157 line:85% position:43% size:65%
The nazis are rounding up,
00:08:11.224 --> 00:08:12.925 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Killing, and sterilizing the
00:08:12.992 --> 00:08:14.126 line:85% position:33% size:45%
Mentally disabled.
00:08:14.193 --> 00:08:16.329 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Each of you owe me 50 pieces of
00:08:16.395 --> 00:08:18.598 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Nazi candy, and I want my candy.
00:08:18.664 --> 00:08:21.167 line:85% position:25% size:28%
Sound good?
00:08:21.234 --> 00:08:23.102 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> mein god, leni riefenstahl
00:08:23.169 --> 00:08:24.871 line:85% position:43% size:65%
Has really let herself go.
00:08:24.937 --> 00:08:26.606 line:85% position:33% size:43%
Get out of the --
00:08:31.944 --> 00:08:33.479 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> tards, tards, tards, tards!
00:08:33.546 --> 00:08:35.047 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> mein fuehrer, I know we're
00:08:35.114 --> 00:08:36.582 line:85% position:48% size:73%
Exterminating their kind from
00:08:36.649 --> 00:08:38.184 line:85% position:48% size:75%
The face of the earth, but the
00:08:38.251 --> 00:08:40.786 line:85% position:35% size:50%
Preferred term is --
00:08:40.853 --> 00:08:42.989 line:85% position:50% size:80%
>> tell me your troop positions.
00:08:43.055 --> 00:08:44.757 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> I respectfully refuse.
00:08:44.824 --> 00:08:46.058 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> give me candy.
00:08:46.125 --> 00:08:47.927 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> I respect-- did you just ask
00:08:47.994 --> 00:08:48.694 line:85% position:23% size:25%
For candy?
00:08:48.761 --> 00:08:49.762 line:85% position:30% size:38%
I might have --
00:08:49.829 --> 00:08:50.997 line:85% position:35% size:48%
>> you're too slow.
00:08:51.063 --> 00:08:54.967 line:85% position:33% size:43%
Send in the bear.
00:08:55.034 --> 00:08:56.769 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> oh, thank goodness.
00:08:56.836 --> 00:08:59.038 line:85% position:48% size:73%
It is a bear like a bear hug,
00:08:59.105 --> 00:09:01.440 line:85% position:50% size:78%
Not like the bare-naked jew who
00:09:01.507 --> 00:09:02.575 line:85% position:25% size:30%
Will rape --
00:09:02.642 --> 00:09:03.276 line:85% position:23% size:23%
>> aaaah!
00:09:03.342 --> 00:09:04.810 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> so, who are your three
00:09:04.877 --> 00:09:06.445 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Handsome escorts, frauelein?
00:09:06.512 --> 00:09:08.047 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> why, they're just three
00:09:08.114 --> 00:09:09.715 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Friends of mine, col. Landa.
00:09:09.782 --> 00:09:11.350 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> hello. Nice to meet you.
00:09:11.417 --> 00:09:12.785 line:85% position:30% size:40%
>> oh, italians.
00:09:12.852 --> 00:09:14.153 line:85% position:30% size:38%
Right this way.
00:09:14.220 --> 00:09:16.489 line:85% position:38% size:55%
[ projector clicking ]
00:09:16.555 --> 00:09:17.957 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> tonight's movie will be
00:09:18.024 --> 00:09:19.025 line:85% position:33% size:43%
"Radio," starring
00:09:19.091 --> 00:09:20.026 line:85% position:30% size:40%
Cuba gooding jr.
00:09:20.092 --> 00:09:21.527 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> wh-where is my pie?
00:09:21.594 --> 00:09:22.461 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ laughter ]
00:09:22.528 --> 00:09:24.330 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> you want strawberry pie or
00:09:24.397 --> 00:09:25.164 line:85% position:23% size:25%
Apple pie?
00:09:25.231 --> 00:09:28.901 line:85% position:43% size:65%
>> I want b-b-b-b-- I want
00:09:28.968 --> 00:09:30.603 line:85% position:33% size:45%
B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b...
00:09:30.670 --> 00:09:33.005 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ laughter ]
00:09:33.072 --> 00:09:37.410 line:85% position:50% size:78%
...B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b --
00:09:37.476 --> 00:09:40.479 line:85% position:35% size:48%
I want b-b-b-b-b...
00:09:40.546 --> 00:09:42.281 line:85% position:33% size:43%
>> what in the...
00:09:42.348 --> 00:09:46.252 line:85% position:48% size:75%
>> ...B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b --
00:09:46.319 --> 00:09:47.887 line:85% position:40% size:60%
I want b-b-both of them.
00:09:47.954 --> 00:09:49.288 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> enough is enough.
00:09:49.355 --> 00:09:51.324 line:85% position:50% size:78%
I have had it with this "Radio"
00:09:51.390 --> 00:09:53.225 line:85% position:25% size:28%
Bull[bleep]
00:09:53.292 --> 00:09:54.460 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> turn off the movie!
00:09:54.527 --> 00:09:55.728 line:85% position:38% size:55%
>> stop the projector!
00:09:55.795 --> 00:09:57.096 line:85% position:43% size:63%
>> you hate "Radio," too?
00:09:57.163 --> 00:09:59.598 line:85% position:45% size:68%
>> with every fiber of mein
00:09:59.665 --> 00:10:02.201 line:85% position:40% size:60%
Being, mein italian fr--
00:10:02.268 --> 00:10:03.269 line:85% position:35% size:50%
>> mongo, we did it!
00:10:03.336 --> 00:10:04.503 line:85% position:40% size:58%
To think, my needlessly
00:10:04.570 --> 00:10:05.905 line:85% position:45% size:70%
Complicated plan to kill him
00:10:05.972 --> 00:10:07.206 line:85% position:43% size:63%
With a showing of "Radio"
00:10:07.273 --> 00:10:08.641 line:85% position:50% size:80%
Failed, and yet still, hitler --
00:10:08.708 --> 00:10:11.477 line:85% position:48% size:73%
>> you killed my best friend!
00:10:11.544 --> 00:10:12.411 line:85% position:25% size:30%
[ crashing ]
00:10:12.478 --> 00:10:13.679 line:85% position:33% size:45%
>> that's our cue.
00:10:13.746 --> 00:10:14.680 line:85% position:28% size:33%
[ screaming ]
00:10:14.747 --> 00:10:16.649 line:85% position:50% size:78%
>> we weren't the ones teaching
00:10:16.716 --> 00:10:17.383 line:85% position:18% size:15%
Radio.
00:10:17.450 --> 00:10:19.452 line:85% position:48% size:75%
Radio is the one been teaching
00:10:19.518 --> 00:10:19.952 line:85% position:15% size:8%
Us.
00:10:20.019 --> 00:10:21.954 line:85% position:28% size:33%
[ explosion ]
00:10:22.021 --> 00:10:23.956 line:85% position:35% size:50%
[ funk music plays ]
30044
