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1
00:03:19,755 --> 00:03:20,713
- You're home.
2
00:03:22,130 --> 00:03:24,338
Great, Deed. I mean, there you are.
3
00:03:24,588 --> 00:03:26,213
You're standing right in front of me.
4
00:03:27,005 --> 00:03:28,130
Hi, Nina.
5
00:03:29,047 --> 00:03:30,088
- Hello, Dee Dee.
6
00:03:30,672 --> 00:03:31,880
- How was your day?
7
00:03:32,130 --> 00:03:34,838
- Very pleasant in a grim sort of way.
8
00:03:39,505 --> 00:03:41,338
So how are things around here?
9
00:03:42,005 --> 00:03:43,880
Oh, did that, uh, what's his name?
10
00:03:44,130 --> 00:03:45,963
That strange bald lawyer call?
11
00:03:46,630 --> 00:03:47,463
- No.
12
00:03:47,713 --> 00:03:50,130
- Well, how about Douglas?
Did he reconfirm for this afternoon?
13
00:03:50,380 --> 00:03:52,338
- No, no one called.
14
00:03:53,255 --> 00:03:54,713
- Well, if he ever does call me here,
15
00:03:55,005 --> 00:03:56,713
it's fine to give him
the number in the car
16
00:03:57,047 --> 00:03:57,963
about the lawyer.
17
00:03:59,130 --> 00:04:01,713
Oh, he represents Merkey,
18
00:04:01,963 --> 00:04:03,463
the artist that I'm showing next month.
19
00:04:03,713 --> 00:04:05,213
Douglas already has the number.
20
00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:09,755
Which means he must still be
coming since he didn't call.
21
00:04:10,630 --> 00:04:11,963
- Well, yeah.
22
00:04:14,380 --> 00:04:16,588
- So...
- What?
23
00:04:17,630 --> 00:04:20,130
- Well, how were things around
here? You were about to say.
24
00:04:20,380 --> 00:04:22,963
- Gardener came.
- And how is Mr. Li?
25
00:04:23,380 --> 00:04:25,505
- He cleared out that underbrush
where you asked about.
26
00:04:26,130 --> 00:04:26,588
- Good.
27
00:04:26,838 --> 00:04:28,838
- He did the deep root fertilization too.
28
00:04:30,005 --> 00:04:31,838
I paid all the bills. The
checks are on your desk.
29
00:04:32,130 --> 00:04:33,130
All you have to do is sign them.
30
00:04:33,630 --> 00:04:35,463
And I bought some haddock
from the fish man this morning.
31
00:04:35,755 --> 00:04:37,088
I made a curry sauce to go with it.
32
00:04:37,338 --> 00:04:38,588
All you have to do is pop it in the oven
33
00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,088
and I left the directions.
34
00:04:41,255 --> 00:04:42,588
- And you'd like to go home now?
35
00:04:43,505 --> 00:04:44,213
Go.
36
00:04:51,380 --> 00:04:53,213
- Oh, uh, Mr. Li said
37
00:04:53,463 --> 00:04:55,088
he won't be back again
for three weeks.
38
00:04:55,338 --> 00:04:56,463
He has to go to Taiwan.
39
00:04:56,755 --> 00:04:58,838
I think he was trying to
tell me some family thing.
40
00:04:59,130 --> 00:04:59,713
- No doubt.
41
00:05:00,005 --> 00:05:01,130
- He wanted to know if
you wanted his nephew
42
00:05:01,380 --> 00:05:02,755
to come back the next two weeks.
43
00:05:03,005 --> 00:05:04,088
- Uh, you said yes, I hope?
44
00:05:04,630 --> 00:05:06,213
You're a good little wife, Dee Dee.
45
00:05:06,463 --> 00:05:07,838
Every woman should have one.
46
00:10:06,630 --> 00:10:07,755
Can I help you?
47
00:10:08,630 --> 00:10:11,213
- Hi.
- Yes?
48
00:10:11,505 --> 00:10:13,505
- I'm Fitch. Fitch.
49
00:10:16,047 --> 00:10:16,838
- Fitch?
50
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:19,213
- I'm here for your appointment.
51
00:10:20,380 --> 00:10:21,630
- Well, where's Douglas?
52
00:10:22,505 --> 00:10:23,505
- Didn't he call you?
53
00:10:24,297 --> 00:10:25,338
Said he was going to.
54
00:10:26,755 --> 00:10:28,338
He said he would call you.
55
00:10:28,922 --> 00:10:31,630
- To tell me what?
- Couldn't make it.
56
00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,880
- Douglas.
- That's what he said.
57
00:10:35,255 --> 00:10:38,005
So where should we set up, Nina?
58
00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:41,088
- Well, wait, wait, wait
just a minute, uh...
59
00:10:42,505 --> 00:10:45,755
We're, uh, we're usually
this way, but where is he?
60
00:10:46,005 --> 00:10:47,213
Do you know?
61
00:10:47,463 --> 00:10:50,338
- Who?
- Douglas.
62
00:10:50,630 --> 00:10:53,255
- Didn't come up.
- I don't understand.
63
00:10:53,505 --> 00:10:55,463
My assistant confirmed the appointment.
64
00:10:56,505 --> 00:10:57,963
Uh, listen, the, the, the thing is,
65
00:10:58,255 --> 00:11:01,838
I'm, I'm really very accustomed
to, to working with...
66
00:11:03,047 --> 00:11:04,838
"The Sun Also Rises."
67
00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:05,963
- I liked it.
68
00:11:07,422 --> 00:11:08,880
- Well, you see, I,
I'm, I'm very accustomed
69
00:11:09,130 --> 00:11:10,505
to working with him, Douglas.
70
00:11:10,755 --> 00:11:13,755
And, and the thing is that I, I like him.
71
00:11:14,005 --> 00:11:17,755
I, I really like him and,
um, well, it takes time,
72
00:11:18,005 --> 00:11:19,713
at least for a woman, you
know, it really takes time
73
00:11:19,963 --> 00:11:21,713
to, to feel comfortable,
really comfortable
74
00:11:22,005 --> 00:11:23,463
with, with a man who you know, really-
75
00:11:23,713 --> 00:11:24,838
- Doug's got the touch.
76
00:11:34,797 --> 00:11:37,088
- Without even picking up a phone or...
77
00:11:39,255 --> 00:11:40,005
Douglas.
78
00:11:41,005 --> 00:11:42,588
When you have a relationship with someone,
79
00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:44,713
a business relationship,
we go back, he and I.
80
00:11:44,963 --> 00:11:48,130
You, you expect some consideration.
81
00:11:48,380 --> 00:11:51,088
- He seemed to be in a
rush. He's very young.
82
00:11:52,755 --> 00:11:54,713
- He's not so terribly young.
83
00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:57,213
- No, not so young, but he's young,
84
00:11:57,505 --> 00:11:59,338
younger than he thinks he is.
85
00:11:59,630 --> 00:12:02,088
Besides, he could have not
called either one of us.
86
00:12:02,797 --> 00:12:04,213
- He's very talented.
87
00:12:05,255 --> 00:12:07,005
- He is. Good looking kid too.
88
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:09,713
Women seem to go for him.
89
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:12,838
A lot of his clients
are women. Most, really.
90
00:12:14,297 --> 00:12:16,338
Outside's nice.
91
00:12:16,630 --> 00:12:17,713
Especially if you have some privacy,
92
00:12:18,005 --> 00:12:19,463
and you have some privacy.
93
00:12:21,130 --> 00:12:22,463
- Douglas does me outside.
94
00:12:23,505 --> 00:12:24,380
- It's really hot.
95
00:12:25,380 --> 00:12:26,838
- I've been there and
done it twice.
96
00:12:29,005 --> 00:12:29,963
- You'd dig it. It's really crazy.
97
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:37,588
- Bit cold out here right now.
98
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,380
- Well, what would you suggest?
99
00:12:43,005 --> 00:12:45,005
- Some dark and quiet place.
100
00:12:46,422 --> 00:12:48,588
I was in such a hurry getting over here.
101
00:12:49,172 --> 00:12:51,338
I've got my oils and things,
102
00:12:51,630 --> 00:12:54,588
but as for towels and sheets,
103
00:12:54,838 --> 00:12:55,588
I'll need some.
104
00:12:57,047 --> 00:12:58,005
- All right.
105
00:13:03,505 --> 00:13:04,755
- I left some stuff in the car.
106
00:13:31,380 --> 00:13:32,213
- Fitch?
107
00:13:47,505 --> 00:13:48,255
Fitch?
108
00:13:51,505 --> 00:13:52,338
Fitch!
109
00:13:57,172 --> 00:13:57,963
Fitch.
110
00:14:15,297 --> 00:14:16,838
- I'm fascinated with things.
111
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:21,838
That is, I'm fascinated with
the fascination with things.
112
00:14:22,505 --> 00:14:23,588
- This is my bedroom.
113
00:14:25,005 --> 00:14:26,130
- I thought it might be.
114
00:14:31,630 --> 00:14:36,713
My mother had a spectacular
jewelry collection as I recall.
115
00:14:37,005 --> 00:14:38,130
- Uh-huh.
116
00:14:38,380 --> 00:14:39,463
- I wanted to wash up,
117
00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:42,630
when I happened to walk by...
118
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:46,588
Thanks. Well, I wanted to wash up.
119
00:15:11,755 --> 00:15:13,880
What massage is about
in the end is healing.
120
00:15:14,172 --> 00:15:15,088
There are ways to heal people
121
00:15:15,380 --> 00:15:17,338
without words or prayers or drugs.
122
00:15:18,630 --> 00:15:21,463
That's it. That's the essence.
123
00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:23,588
- I never really gave it much thought.
124
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,838
- Healing?
- Massage, in those terms.
125
00:15:28,797 --> 00:15:31,213
I try not to over-intellectualize things.
126
00:15:31,505 --> 00:15:32,588
It makes life so great.
127
00:15:33,505 --> 00:15:35,963
I'm, uh, I'm more intuitive I think.
128
00:15:38,505 --> 00:15:39,338
How old are you?
129
00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:43,880
' WhY do you ask?
130
00:15:44,755 --> 00:15:46,505
- I don't know. Why not ask?
131
00:15:46,755 --> 00:15:48,963
I mean, you never learn anything
if you don't ask, right?
132
00:15:50,172 --> 00:15:51,088
- Older than you.
133
00:15:55,797 --> 00:15:58,713
The laying on of hands,
there's power in it.
134
00:16:01,797 --> 00:16:06,213
But in our culture, there are
so many Western prejudices
135
00:16:06,463 --> 00:16:08,130
against illness and healing.
136
00:16:09,755 --> 00:16:12,338
We're really pretty
tight-assed, medically speaking.
137
00:16:14,255 --> 00:16:15,463
You just think about it.
138
00:16:16,797 --> 00:16:20,380
When was the last time your
doctor really touched you?
139
00:16:21,297 --> 00:16:23,838
I don't mean probed or examined you.
140
00:16:25,255 --> 00:16:26,130
But touched you.
141
00:16:27,922 --> 00:16:31,338
- Well, if it never
happened, it was too recent.
142
00:16:31,630 --> 00:16:32,838
I don't like doctors.
143
00:16:33,672 --> 00:16:35,588
- That's because they consult with you.
144
00:16:36,422 --> 00:16:38,130
They talk with you over the phone
145
00:16:39,380 --> 00:16:41,005
or they prescribe drugs,
146
00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:45,588
but they don't personally feel you.
147
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,755
They leave that to time or to chemistry.
148
00:16:49,505 --> 00:16:52,463
- I don't like doctors,
because I don't like doctors.
149
00:16:54,755 --> 00:16:56,088
You've known Doug how long?
150
00:16:58,005 --> 00:17:00,463
- Not long.
- Long enough to like him?
151
00:17:02,380 --> 00:17:03,588
- How long does that take?
152
00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:09,963
It goes back to the ancients, you know.
153
00:17:11,005 --> 00:17:11,713
- What's that?
154
00:17:13,130 --> 00:17:14,338
Massage.
155
00:17:15,630 --> 00:17:17,713
Maybe even earlier, some historians think.
156
00:17:19,505 --> 00:17:23,380
The Greeks were mainly into
massage as a treatment,
157
00:17:23,630 --> 00:17:24,963
a healing aid.
158
00:17:26,130 --> 00:17:29,255
They have records of people
like Socrates and Plato
159
00:17:29,630 --> 00:17:32,380
being massaged daily,
and Plato lived to 104.
160
00:17:33,505 --> 00:17:34,713
- Socrates did not.
161
00:17:36,380 --> 00:17:38,588
- But the Romans being who they were,
162
00:17:38,880 --> 00:17:40,880
essentially Italians without the loafers,
163
00:17:41,922 --> 00:17:45,255
were the first to oome up
with the idea of massage
164
00:17:46,255 --> 00:17:48,005
as a form of foreplay.
165
00:17:48,255 --> 00:17:50,713
Courtesans became quite good at it.
166
00:17:51,005 --> 00:17:53,588
It became part of the transaction finally.
167
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:55,338
- Well, you don't have
to be a rocket scientist
168
00:17:55,588 --> 00:17:56,588
to make the connection.
169
00:17:56,838 --> 00:17:59,255
Massage is sexual. Very sexual.
170
00:18:01,005 --> 00:18:02,338
- It can be. Doesn't have to be.
171
00:18:03,630 --> 00:18:04,755
Shouldn't always be.
172
00:18:05,005 --> 00:18:08,255
- Well, I wasn't talking about a sweating,
173
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:10,088
screaming, orgasmic epiphany.
174
00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:11,713
It's just that you're lying there naked.
175
00:18:11,963 --> 00:18:13,088
Someone's touching you in places
176
00:18:13,380 --> 00:18:15,088
you sure wouldn't let
your father touch you,
177
00:18:15,380 --> 00:18:16,838
and it's arousing.
178
00:18:19,380 --> 00:18:20,130
Um...
179
00:18:23,630 --> 00:18:24,838
This is my desk.
180
00:18:25,088 --> 00:18:26,963
- It's a form of communication.
181
00:18:27,505 --> 00:18:28,630
Just have to make sure
you're both speaking
182
00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:30,213
the same language.
183
00:18:32,797 --> 00:18:36,380
- Well, looks like you're
ready to get started.
184
00:18:37,047 --> 00:18:38,213
- We've already started.
185
00:18:39,047 --> 00:18:39,963
- What do you mean?
186
00:18:40,255 --> 00:18:42,088
- Well, most of any massage worth having
187
00:18:42,505 --> 00:18:44,838
takes place in the head, and
I'm sure you've been preparing.
188
00:18:45,672 --> 00:18:47,713
Why? Are you in a hurry?
189
00:18:49,172 --> 00:18:49,755
- No.
190
00:18:54,755 --> 00:18:56,005
- Funny little thing, eh?
191
00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:00,505
Maybe you'd like some music.
192
00:19:00,755 --> 00:19:01,713
What happened to that
music you were playing
193
00:19:01,963 --> 00:19:03,130
before you turned it off?
194
00:19:04,047 --> 00:19:05,255
- I'll find something.
195
00:20:02,713 --> 00:20:04,380
- I'd say we're ready.
196
00:20:25,672 --> 00:20:27,005
So what are we working on, Nina?
197
00:20:27,255 --> 00:20:29,047
Any complaints or maladies?
198
00:20:29,297 --> 00:20:31,380
Any part of the body that
needs special attention?
199
00:20:31,672 --> 00:20:33,422
- You know, the part that
starts with my hairline
200
00:20:33,713 --> 00:20:34,922
and ends with my toes.
201
00:20:50,172 --> 00:20:51,922
It's my job, you know.
202
00:20:54,088 --> 00:20:56,755
You were gonna say something
about how tense I am.
203
00:20:58,672 --> 00:21:02,130
Douglas is always telling me
how much tension I have,
204
00:21:02,422 --> 00:21:05,130
especially in my upper back and shoulders.
205
00:21:06,047 --> 00:21:07,505
It's all because of my job.
206
00:21:21,922 --> 00:21:22,672
I have a gallery.
207
00:21:23,963 --> 00:21:25,755
Well, a couple of them actually.
208
00:21:26,047 --> 00:21:28,297
One here in town off Melrose.
209
00:21:28,547 --> 00:21:30,255
One in New York. Tribeca.
210
00:21:32,922 --> 00:21:35,880
Anyway, when it's your
business, your baby,
211
00:21:37,338 --> 00:21:38,797
you know what they say
about responsibility
212
00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:40,505
falling on your shoulders.
213
00:21:40,797 --> 00:21:42,422
- Best not to talk too much.
214
00:21:43,713 --> 00:21:45,255
- Was I talking too much?
215
00:21:46,297 --> 00:21:48,630
- Well, it's your massage.
You can do anything you like.
216
00:21:49,672 --> 00:21:51,755
You really should try to relax.
217
00:21:53,213 --> 00:21:55,380
You can't keep going all the time.
218
00:21:56,297 --> 00:21:57,755
Or is that what the people at work do?
219
00:21:58,588 --> 00:22:00,630
- Hmm, people I work with,
220
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:04,130
relaxation is limited to what
they can purchase in a vial.
221
00:22:24,047 --> 00:22:25,755
- See, it's working already.
222
00:22:59,047 --> 00:22:59,797
okay
223
00:23:01,047 --> 00:23:03,505
Angels keep their ancient places,
224
00:23:04,672 --> 00:23:06,880
Turn but a stone and start a wing!
225
00:23:07,547 --> 00:23:10,755
'Tis ye 'Tis your estranged faces
226
00:23:11,297 --> 00:23:14,047
That miss the many-splendoured Thing.
227
00:23:25,797 --> 00:23:28,130
- How long have you been
doing massage, Fitch?
228
00:23:31,797 --> 00:23:33,297
- Almost 20 years on and off.
229
00:23:35,213 --> 00:23:40,172
J' As I walked out on
the streets of Laredo J'
230
00:23:41,922 --> 00:23:45,422
J' I went down to the St. James J'
231
00:23:45,672 --> 00:23:47,922
J' Infirmary J'
232
00:23:51,338 --> 00:23:52,505
- Interesting work.
233
00:23:55,463 --> 00:23:57,380
I'm sure you meet all kinds of people.
234
00:23:59,922 --> 00:24:01,922
It gives you a lot of freedom too, I bet.
235
00:24:02,797 --> 00:24:05,422
I mean, so portable.
236
00:24:05,838 --> 00:24:07,255
Have table, will travel.
237
00:24:11,213 --> 00:24:13,922
I travel a lot in my work.
238
00:24:16,088 --> 00:24:17,963
Too much, I'm starting to think.
239
00:24:19,922 --> 00:24:23,005
Guess it just depends how
badly you want what you want.
240
00:24:29,672 --> 00:24:30,922
Do you like art?
241
00:24:32,588 --> 00:24:35,005
You seem like the sort of person who does.
242
00:24:38,672 --> 00:24:40,505
- And what sort of person is that?
243
00:24:41,588 --> 00:24:42,797
- Well, some...
244
00:24:44,797 --> 00:24:45,630
What do you mean?
245
00:24:46,297 --> 00:24:48,005
- It's just that I didn't know
there was a type, that's all.
246
00:24:48,297 --> 00:24:52,130
But maybe you know better
about that than I do.
247
00:25:24,922 --> 00:25:26,005
_ Okay, not a type,
248
00:25:26,255 --> 00:25:30,422
but I like art, artists.
249
00:25:31,547 --> 00:25:33,505
They hide themselves inside their work.
250
00:25:34,797 --> 00:25:36,255
Soto really understand the work,
251
00:25:36,505 --> 00:25:39,755
you have to get to know the artist.
252
00:25:41,838 --> 00:25:45,005
Well, do you enjoy art?
253
00:25:46,797 --> 00:25:49,172
- Who would you consider
to be the great artist of this century?
254
00:25:50,422 --> 00:25:51,880
- How do you mean?
255
00:25:52,463 --> 00:25:54,047
- Well, who are the five greatest?
256
00:25:54,922 --> 00:25:56,380
Or four...
257
00:25:57,172 --> 00:25:58,380
or three?
258
00:25:59,172 --> 00:26:01,255
- I'm really not in that business.
259
00:26:02,672 --> 00:26:05,130
- Would you say Picasso? Would he be one?
260
00:26:06,047 --> 00:26:07,255
Or Chagall?
261
00:26:07,547 --> 00:26:09,172
- I don't think you can
262
00:26:09,547 --> 00:26:11,880
quantify artistic achievement.
263
00:26:12,172 --> 00:26:14,630
- Or maybe Braque or Klee?
264
00:26:16,422 --> 00:26:18,380
- What's your point, Fitch?
265
00:26:36,797 --> 00:26:37,797
What were you saying?
266
00:26:41,047 --> 00:26:43,547
You started to say something
then you just stopped.
267
00:26:49,672 --> 00:26:50,505
Fitch?
268
00:26:58,797 --> 00:26:59,547
- Fitch?
269
00:27:02,713 --> 00:27:05,547
Fitch? What are you doing?
270
00:27:07,422 --> 00:27:08,297
- This is just me now.
271
00:27:08,588 --> 00:27:09,505
This is just my opinion,
272
00:27:09,797 --> 00:27:14,755
but so much of what passes for
art today, contemporary art,
273
00:27:15,338 --> 00:27:17,130
is without any kind of reference point.
274
00:27:17,422 --> 00:27:20,130
Moral, historic, nothing.
It's not about anything.
275
00:27:20,380 --> 00:27:21,672
- I disagree completely.
276
00:27:22,672 --> 00:27:25,255
Modern art is critical.
That's what makes it modern.
277
00:27:28,213 --> 00:27:29,547
What are those?
278
00:27:30,797 --> 00:27:33,297
- I don't know. I found
'em in the trunk of my car.
279
00:27:35,213 --> 00:27:37,255
Magnets.
- Magnets.
280
00:27:38,838 --> 00:27:40,297
- About 400 gauss potency.
281
00:27:40,547 --> 00:27:42,422
Perfect for those hard-to-treat areas.
282
00:27:43,213 --> 00:27:44,005
- Mm...
283
00:27:45,922 --> 00:27:47,880
Now you really must visit my gallery.
284
00:27:48,463 --> 00:27:50,755
I have a very interesting
installation going in next month
285
00:27:51,047 --> 00:27:52,005
I think you should see.
286
00:27:52,255 --> 00:27:52,880
- What's that?
287
00:27:53,172 --> 00:27:56,130
- It's a history of women's
fashion as a form of bondage.
288
00:27:57,297 --> 00:27:58,797
Mm, come see it. You'll enjoy it.
289
00:27:59,338 --> 00:28:03,130
It has a point of view. Ironic, satiric.
290
00:28:03,380 --> 00:28:05,505
- Point of view.
- Exactly.
291
00:28:06,422 --> 00:28:08,005
- Well, I'll tell you,
292
00:28:08,463 --> 00:28:10,630
and this is why so much of
art today is so pointless,
293
00:28:10,922 --> 00:28:13,005
that what we as our society suffers from,
294
00:28:13,588 --> 00:28:16,380
is a kind of bankruptcy of spirit.
295
00:28:17,422 --> 00:28:19,130
- Well, I'm sure people have
said something like that
296
00:28:19,380 --> 00:28:21,005
as long as there've been
people around to say it.
297
00:28:21,255 --> 00:28:22,422
- Yeah, except
this time, it's true.
298
00:28:22,672 --> 00:28:24,005
- I'm sure they said that too.
299
00:28:34,672 --> 00:28:37,797
If you're talking about today,
the way we live, it's fear.
300
00:28:38,088 --> 00:28:39,380
That's what defines us.
301
00:28:40,547 --> 00:28:41,380
- Is this yours?
302
00:28:41,838 --> 00:28:42,797
- Mm.
303
00:28:47,005 --> 00:28:48,505
- Fear of change,
304
00:28:48,755 --> 00:28:50,005
fear of the future.
305
00:28:50,922 --> 00:28:52,422
Technology changing things faster
306
00:28:52,672 --> 00:28:54,130
than people can take it in.
307
00:28:54,380 --> 00:28:56,380
It turns us into strangers, everyone.
308
00:28:56,797 --> 00:28:59,005
That's why people create
the art they create.
309
00:29:00,047 --> 00:29:02,380
- Bad faith.
- What is?
310
00:29:03,297 --> 00:29:04,672
- Blaming someone else.
311
00:29:04,922 --> 00:29:06,547
Something else, technology,
312
00:29:07,088 --> 00:29:10,005
as though we had no responsibility
over ourselves, our actions.
313
00:29:10,297 --> 00:29:12,630
- Oh, so what would you suggest?
314
00:29:13,172 --> 00:29:15,422
- I suggest we look inward, all of us,
315
00:29:16,422 --> 00:29:17,505
for starters.
316
00:29:18,422 --> 00:29:21,422
And then I suggest, we look outward.
317
00:29:23,963 --> 00:29:27,297
- Then do we all sit around
cross-legged humming like gnats?
318
00:29:27,672 --> 00:29:28,755
- We could. We might.
319
00:29:30,172 --> 00:29:31,047
Why not?
320
00:29:32,797 --> 00:29:34,505
Or else we could just go out and kill
321
00:29:34,797 --> 00:29:36,297
all the gallery owners.
322
00:29:42,672 --> 00:29:43,922
- What do you think of it?
323
00:29:50,672 --> 00:29:51,630
- Where do you show?
324
00:29:54,672 --> 00:29:55,963
- Where do I show?
325
00:30:02,047 --> 00:30:03,672
- Do you have any family, Fitch?
326
00:30:04,172 --> 00:30:07,255
Awife, children?
- Mm-mm.
327
00:30:07,797 --> 00:30:09,130
- Mother, father?
328
00:30:11,713 --> 00:30:13,630
- Gone now. They've been dead a while.
329
00:30:14,547 --> 00:30:16,130
I have a sister back in Sydney.
330
00:30:17,922 --> 00:30:20,047
- I try to stay close to my family.
331
00:30:20,422 --> 00:30:22,047
It's important. Don't you think?
332
00:30:22,547 --> 00:30:26,505
My sister's in Boston. My
brother's in Georgia somewhere.
333
00:30:26,797 --> 00:30:29,630
My parents are retired in
Florida, but we work at it.
334
00:30:31,047 --> 00:30:32,630
It's important, don't you think?
335
00:30:35,297 --> 00:30:37,880
I think so. Families staying close.
336
00:30:40,838 --> 00:30:42,547
What makes you think that?
337
00:30:42,797 --> 00:30:43,797
- Think what?
338
00:30:44,422 --> 00:30:48,422
- A bankruptcy of spirit. ls
that really what we're about?
339
00:30:49,338 --> 00:30:50,005
- Call it what you like.
340
00:30:50,255 --> 00:30:53,047
The essence of it is, is
that we have lost our way
341
00:30:53,422 --> 00:30:54,630
as a civilization.
342
00:30:54,963 --> 00:30:56,380
Spiritually, I'm saying.
343
00:30:57,547 --> 00:30:58,880
I've been around and the
one thing I've learned
344
00:30:59,172 --> 00:31:01,547
is we don't know what we don't know.
345
00:31:24,422 --> 00:31:27,630
- My work, I suppose, has
a spiritual side to it.
346
00:31:28,172 --> 00:31:29,755
Each artist is unique.
347
00:31:30,672 --> 00:31:32,422
Each has individual needs.
348
00:31:34,338 --> 00:31:35,505
- Where do I show?
349
00:31:39,463 --> 00:31:41,505
People like me don't show anywhere.
350
00:31:44,963 --> 00:31:46,005
I'm not in fashion.
351
00:31:54,922 --> 00:31:57,380
- Of course, there is a
little matter of compensation.
352
00:31:58,213 --> 00:32:01,172
- People understand that
when they oome to me.
353
00:32:01,547 --> 00:32:03,297
Usually that's why they come to me.
354
00:32:04,713 --> 00:32:07,755
Artists are rarely as concerned
with the idea of their
355
00:32:08,297 --> 00:32:10,755
earning a living as
everyone else seems to be.
356
00:32:12,797 --> 00:32:16,005
Oh, oh, oh.
357
00:32:17,422 --> 00:32:21,880
Ah, ah, ah.
358
00:32:22,547 --> 00:32:25,380
Ah, ah.
359
00:32:26,422 --> 00:32:27,255
- Oh, Nina.
360
00:32:29,922 --> 00:32:32,380
- Hmm? What's this?
361
00:32:33,047 --> 00:32:35,880
- It's a shiatsu thumb
for when I get tired.
362
00:32:46,713 --> 00:32:50,130
- So what's the, uh,
spiritual side to your work?
363
00:32:52,047 --> 00:32:54,130
This is not too hard for you, is it, Nina?
364
00:32:55,713 --> 00:32:57,005
' WhY do you ask?
365
00:33:01,047 --> 00:33:05,255
I had aspirations, artistic aspirations.
366
00:33:06,297 --> 00:33:09,255
Except I saw myself up on stage somewhere
367
00:33:09,672 --> 00:33:10,880
as a performer.
368
00:33:12,172 --> 00:33:15,547
Only problem was I couldn't sing or dance.
369
00:33:16,547 --> 00:33:17,505
I oould audition.
370
00:33:18,922 --> 00:33:22,255
You see, my gift is I know how to sell,
371
00:33:22,672 --> 00:33:24,255
so I sell myself.
372
00:33:24,505 --> 00:33:26,005
And then rehearsal, come to think of it,
373
00:33:26,255 --> 00:33:28,880
I was okay, passable.
374
00:33:31,422 --> 00:33:33,005
- Would I have seen you in anything?
375
00:33:33,380 --> 00:33:35,297
- No. Lucky man.
376
00:33:36,588 --> 00:33:38,547
- So how'd the gallery business get you?
377
00:33:39,047 --> 00:33:42,130
- Mmm... Same way most people
end up doing what they do.
378
00:33:43,172 --> 00:33:44,755
Fell in love with the wrong man.
379
00:33:46,047 --> 00:33:47,380
- Artist.
380
00:33:48,838 --> 00:33:51,505
- Artist, art dealer, art critic.
381
00:33:53,172 --> 00:33:56,922
He was all artistic things
to all artistic people.
382
00:34:13,838 --> 00:34:16,005
- Now kneel up, head this end.
383
00:34:20,047 --> 00:34:21,630
And what happened to him?
384
00:34:23,172 --> 00:34:24,130
- Who knows, really?
385
00:34:29,547 --> 00:34:31,047
Like this?
- Mm-hmm.
386
00:34:35,797 --> 00:34:37,380
- I like what I do,
387
00:34:37,713 --> 00:34:40,130
where I've ended up, who I am.
388
00:34:41,088 --> 00:34:43,130
I get enormous satisfaction from it.
389
00:34:46,297 --> 00:34:48,922
You happy, Fitch?
- Happy?
390
00:34:51,672 --> 00:34:54,422
- Well, you said you've done
all this traveling around.
391
00:34:55,047 --> 00:34:57,255
I was just wondering if it made you happy.
392
00:35:06,338 --> 00:35:08,172
- Made me a better person?
393
00:35:08,922 --> 00:35:09,880
Sure, I suppose so.
394
00:35:10,922 --> 00:35:13,255
Happier than most people,
if that's what it's about.
395
00:35:14,797 --> 00:35:18,297
But there's more to happiness
than just being happy.
396
00:35:20,547 --> 00:35:21,547
- Meaning what?
397
00:35:26,338 --> 00:35:29,713
- Well, to most people,
culture, civilizations,
398
00:35:29,963 --> 00:35:32,463
the idea of happiness is
not some trivial thing.
399
00:35:33,005 --> 00:35:35,963
It's not a good job or
a new car in the drive.
400
00:35:36,672 --> 00:35:38,505
It's something else entirely.
401
00:35:39,547 --> 00:35:40,963
- Something spiritual.
402
00:35:42,422 --> 00:35:46,505
- The Hopi Indians believe
that the body of a person
403
00:35:47,172 --> 00:35:49,713
and the earth formed in the same way.
404
00:35:53,130 --> 00:35:54,588
Along an axis.
405
00:35:58,380 --> 00:36:00,005
Now for you and me,
406
00:36:01,380 --> 00:36:02,880
this axis...
407
00:36:04,130 --> 00:36:05,963
is our spine or our backbone.
408
00:36:07,505 --> 00:36:08,880
And along this axis...
409
00:36:10,380 --> 00:36:12,255
are various centers of force.
410
00:36:25,380 --> 00:36:26,880
- Centers of force?
411
00:37:12,005 --> 00:37:14,463
- They're all very important,
these different centers of the body.
412
00:37:15,797 --> 00:37:19,380
The brain, the throat,
413
00:37:20,755 --> 00:37:22,463
the solar plexus.
414
00:37:24,380 --> 00:37:26,963
But the most important of all...
415
00:37:27,547 --> 00:37:28,547
is the heart.
416
00:37:29,922 --> 00:37:32,213
"Follow its sincere
purpose," the Hopi say,
417
00:37:32,505 --> 00:37:34,213
"and you are of one heart."
418
00:37:36,255 --> 00:37:37,963
"Allow evil thoughts to enter,
419
00:37:39,505 --> 00:37:41,505
and you are of two hearts."
420
00:37:44,255 --> 00:37:45,880
The Tibetans and Hindus believed
421
00:37:46,130 --> 00:37:49,088
in an almost identical series
of centers in the body.
422
00:37:50,380 --> 00:37:52,630
The most interesting part
is how the Hopi medicine man
423
00:37:52,922 --> 00:37:54,880
takes these centers of force...
424
00:37:56,380 --> 00:37:57,588
and treats someone.
425
00:37:58,922 --> 00:38:01,505
- You see, he can tell what's
wrong with just his hands.
426
00:38:02,672 --> 00:38:04,963
You can feel the vibrations in each center
427
00:38:06,005 --> 00:38:10,213
and find in which one life
runs strongest or weakest.
428
00:38:42,005 --> 00:38:46,130
- Sometimes what's wrong
is what you'd call illness.
429
00:38:47,797 --> 00:38:50,963
But other times it comes from outside.
430
00:38:53,505 --> 00:38:56,963
Drawn by our own evil thoughts
and those of a two heart.
431
00:38:59,630 --> 00:39:01,630
- What's this?
- Mushroom tea.
432
00:39:02,005 --> 00:39:02,880
It'll cleanse you.
433
00:39:04,255 --> 00:39:08,463
And that way, he can see
the source of the trouble
434
00:39:08,797 --> 00:39:12,088
and the Hopi say the actual
face of the two heart,
435
00:39:12,380 --> 00:39:13,380
who's causing it.
436
00:39:14,755 --> 00:39:17,713
- Um, tell me you got a
crystal in that bag of yours.
437
00:39:18,630 --> 00:39:19,088
- No.
438
00:39:19,380 --> 00:39:21,630
- 'Cause I could stand
to know the two hearts
439
00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:22,838
causing me my pain.
440
00:39:23,130 --> 00:39:25,838
- Works though, this kind of healing.
441
00:39:26,755 --> 00:39:29,755
Modern medicine and any science,
when you think about it,
442
00:39:30,047 --> 00:39:31,255
is a belief system,
443
00:39:32,547 --> 00:39:35,338
a religion like any other religion.
444
00:39:36,755 --> 00:39:39,338
Medicine works because
we believe it will work.
445
00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:41,755
- You know, sometimes it just works.
446
00:39:42,047 --> 00:39:43,588
- And a lot of times it doesn't.
447
00:39:45,505 --> 00:39:49,088
- And the medicine man,
he uses his crystals.
448
00:40:02,422 --> 00:40:04,130
This is the teaching crystal.
449
00:40:12,672 --> 00:40:14,088
This is the shaman's crystal.
450
00:40:17,130 --> 00:40:20,088
He looks through it at
each of the centers.
451
00:40:48,755 --> 00:40:50,380
They understand themselves.
452
00:40:51,380 --> 00:40:52,338
The Hopis.
453
00:41:00,630 --> 00:41:03,588
- I like clergymen even
less than I like doctors.
454
00:41:03,922 --> 00:41:06,255
- That's because you worship
at the temple of art,
455
00:41:06,672 --> 00:41:08,463
which is a whole lot like
the temple of science
456
00:41:08,755 --> 00:41:09,880
when you get down to it.
457
00:41:10,755 --> 00:41:14,463
Your God is a jealous God.
The mostjealous God of all.
458
00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:18,088
The God of reason.
459
00:41:18,422 --> 00:41:20,838
- Oh, what do you suggest, that I convert?
460
00:41:21,297 --> 00:41:22,713
Become a Hopi mystic?
461
00:41:24,172 --> 00:41:25,588
Can you do that, by the way?
462
00:41:26,380 --> 00:41:27,963
Convert to another race?
463
00:41:28,380 --> 00:41:30,005
- The point I was
making really is that...
464
00:41:30,672 --> 00:41:32,338
without realizing it,
465
00:41:33,630 --> 00:41:35,380
we've given up one form of mysticism
466
00:41:35,672 --> 00:41:38,463
for another, more socially
acceptable form of mysticism.
467
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:39,463
Now I don't know about you,
468
00:41:39,755 --> 00:41:41,338
but I've never seen a
black hole or a quark.
469
00:41:41,588 --> 00:41:42,713
They may exist, they may not.
470
00:41:43,755 --> 00:41:45,463
Personally, I have no way of knowing.
471
00:41:46,172 --> 00:41:47,463
What I do know is...
472
00:41:48,172 --> 00:41:50,005
that I've seen Hopis walk away healed
473
00:41:50,297 --> 00:41:53,130
by a medicine man using no
more than a pair of hands
474
00:41:53,422 --> 00:41:54,463
and a few crystals.
475
00:41:55,547 --> 00:41:57,005
- Christ, you're patronizing.
476
00:41:58,005 --> 00:41:59,505
- All I'm saying is that...
477
00:42:00,380 --> 00:42:04,838
we, everyone, have replaced
the system of belief
478
00:42:05,088 --> 00:42:06,505
with a system of disbelief.
479
00:42:07,505 --> 00:42:09,963
And that it's found its way
into everything we do and think.
480
00:42:10,380 --> 00:42:12,380
We've lost our capacity for wonder.
481
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:14,755
And this is the insidious part.
482
00:42:15,255 --> 00:42:17,005
No one even knows it's happened.
483
00:42:17,380 --> 00:42:18,380
- Except for you.
484
00:42:30,505 --> 00:42:33,463
- They understand themselves, the Hopis.
485
00:42:40,130 --> 00:42:41,255
- I just got it.
486
00:42:43,088 --> 00:42:43,963
What do you think?
487
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,213
- Doesn't matter what I think.
488
00:42:50,880 --> 00:42:53,713
- Well, what do you mean, it
doesn't matter what you think? I...
489
00:42:54,672 --> 00:42:55,963
I want your opinion.
490
00:42:59,838 --> 00:43:01,838
- There's only one reason to do art.
491
00:43:02,630 --> 00:43:04,005
It needs to be done.
492
00:43:05,505 --> 00:43:08,505
He did it. So why discuss it?
493
00:43:09,255 --> 00:43:10,880
- Oh, come on.
494
00:43:11,380 --> 00:43:13,213
I just wanted to know what you think.
495
00:43:17,380 --> 00:43:20,088
Where have you been,
Fitch? In your travels.
496
00:43:20,547 --> 00:43:23,088
- More places than
I can sometimes remember.
497
00:43:23,380 --> 00:43:24,213
- For example?
498
00:43:25,630 --> 00:43:26,713
- Wherever the spirit takes me.
499
00:43:27,130 --> 00:43:30,963
Far East, Africa, a year with
the Aborigines in Australia.
500
00:43:32,755 --> 00:43:34,838
- Sort of massaged your
way from one end of the world
501
00:43:35,130 --> 00:43:35,963
to the other, huh?
502
00:43:37,422 --> 00:43:38,255
I envy that.
503
00:43:39,255 --> 00:43:42,838
- What? Traveling the world.
- Having no responsibilities.
504
00:43:43,130 --> 00:43:44,588
- No responsibilities?
505
00:43:45,130 --> 00:43:46,338
Just the opposite I think.
506
00:43:47,755 --> 00:43:49,588
- Why did you oome here tonight?
507
00:43:50,130 --> 00:43:50,963
- Why wouldn't I?
508
00:43:51,922 --> 00:43:54,588
- The Far East, Africa, Aborigines.
509
00:43:56,422 --> 00:43:57,463
I'm not your style.
510
00:43:58,380 --> 00:44:02,380
- Doug asked me to. He
said you were different.
511
00:44:03,130 --> 00:44:07,088
- Did he? I like him.
512
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:09,505
- He said of all the people he knew,
513
00:44:10,422 --> 00:44:12,005
you were the one who was most...
514
00:44:12,297 --> 00:44:14,838
- What?
- Ad rift.
515
00:44:16,672 --> 00:44:19,588
- Adrift?
- That was the word.
516
00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:22,963
- Why would he say that?
517
00:44:23,380 --> 00:44:24,588
- Doug's got the touch.
518
00:44:27,130 --> 00:44:28,838
- Well, what do you
suppose that means? Adrift.
519
00:44:29,088 --> 00:44:31,713
I mean, what does that mean?
520
00:44:32,880 --> 00:44:35,630
- Your heart, your
spirit. You're searching.
521
00:44:36,755 --> 00:44:38,630
- How would he know? He's a kid.
522
00:44:39,172 --> 00:44:41,838
- Not as much of a kid as
he thinks he is. Turn over.
523
00:44:43,630 --> 00:44:46,463
- All my life, it's been the same thing.
524
00:44:47,755 --> 00:44:50,380
Men refusing to see me for what I am.
525
00:44:51,005 --> 00:44:54,005
Projecting their idea of who
I should be on me instead.
526
00:44:54,755 --> 00:44:57,130
Now even the guy who
does my massages...
527
00:44:57,797 --> 00:44:59,338
wants me to be something I'm not.
528
00:45:00,130 --> 00:45:01,088
- And what's that?
529
00:45:01,630 --> 00:45:03,963
- A tormented, career-obsessed woman.
530
00:45:04,505 --> 00:45:06,213
I mean, why not take a little risk
531
00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:09,463
and actually get to know
someone on a more complex level?
532
00:45:11,922 --> 00:45:13,463
I really thought more of Douglas.
533
00:45:13,922 --> 00:45:15,505
I know he's your friend, but...
534
00:45:17,297 --> 00:45:18,838
I really thought more of him.
535
00:45:19,380 --> 00:45:20,338
- So is it a risk?
536
00:45:21,005 --> 00:45:22,838
- What?
- Complexity.
537
00:45:24,047 --> 00:45:25,630
Just now you said he wouldn't risk
538
00:45:25,880 --> 00:45:27,213
knowing you on a more complex level,
539
00:45:27,463 --> 00:45:30,505
so is complexity dangerous?
540
00:45:31,130 --> 00:45:34,380
- Isn't it?
- Well, you said itwas.
541
00:45:35,130 --> 00:45:35,755
- Well, it is.
542
00:45:36,005 --> 00:45:38,338
Get, getting to know
someone is always a risk.
543
00:45:39,755 --> 00:45:42,088
- In what way?
- In every way.
544
00:45:43,005 --> 00:45:44,213
In every conceivable way.
545
00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,005
- I'm not sure I get it.
546
00:46:20,380 --> 00:46:22,463
- I find myself thinking
about you all the time.
547
00:46:23,130 --> 00:46:24,463
- Is that a bad thing?
548
00:46:27,255 --> 00:46:28,880
- That's what I was gonna ask you.
549
00:46:29,630 --> 00:46:33,713
- Hmm, is everything in your
life always so complicated?
550
00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:38,005
- No. Just the important things.
551
00:47:13,505 --> 00:47:15,463
- Intimacy, whether it's emotional
552
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:17,838
or intellectual or sexual,
553
00:47:18,255 --> 00:47:20,088
I think it can be very threatening.
554
00:47:20,880 --> 00:47:23,588
- Threatening or a risk?
555
00:47:24,172 --> 00:47:26,338
- Semantics? Christ.
556
00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:28,838
- No, I'm just trying to understand you.
557
00:47:29,130 --> 00:47:30,130
You said said Doug didn't.
558
00:47:30,797 --> 00:47:33,130
So I'm trying to. Lay down.
559
00:47:34,755 --> 00:47:35,963
That's what these are for.
560
00:47:47,630 --> 00:47:50,963
Colors draw things out
of you, even in silence.
561
00:47:52,505 --> 00:47:55,088
- It's a fundamental difference
between men and women.
562
00:47:55,797 --> 00:47:56,838
- What is?
563
00:47:57,755 --> 00:47:59,588
- The degree of intimacy they're willing
564
00:47:59,838 --> 00:48:01,130
to open themselves up to.
565
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:05,380
I mean, any relationship, not
just a romantic sexual one.
566
00:48:06,380 --> 00:48:07,505
- And you base that on?
567
00:48:08,130 --> 00:48:08,880
- How did this happen?
568
00:48:09,172 --> 00:48:10,838
- Back up. Turn slowly one way.
569
00:48:11,130 --> 00:48:12,338
- I thought I
came here to sketch you.
570
00:48:15,172 --> 00:48:18,005
- Well, I'm not sure
there is this huge difference.
571
00:48:18,630 --> 00:48:20,088
I haven't seen it, anyway.
572
00:48:20,380 --> 00:48:22,380
- Are you trying to get a rise out of me?
573
00:48:22,672 --> 00:48:24,755
- Does it sound like
that? I didn't mean it to.
574
00:48:26,297 --> 00:48:28,463
- It's this whole thing we used to debate.
575
00:48:29,380 --> 00:48:31,380
Of what drives a man after sex.
576
00:48:31,755 --> 00:48:33,255
I mean, is it nature or
nurture that makes him
577
00:48:33,630 --> 00:48:36,338
wanna run for the door while a
woman would lie there forever?
578
00:48:36,755 --> 00:48:37,338
- And that's the difference?
579
00:48:37,630 --> 00:48:39,838
The etiquette of sex with a stranger?
580
00:48:40,297 --> 00:48:42,505
- I never said anything about strangers.
581
00:48:43,505 --> 00:48:45,463
- Well, as much as a man might be tempted,
582
00:48:46,005 --> 00:48:47,588
I don't think he's gonna bolt for the door
583
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:49,588
the minute he's had sex with his wife.
584
00:48:52,297 --> 00:48:54,588
- Obviously, you don't
know the same men I do.
585
00:48:56,172 --> 00:48:58,505
- That's good. Now turn slow.
586
00:48:58,797 --> 00:49:00,213
- This better be good.
587
00:49:01,630 --> 00:49:02,880
Show it to me.
- No.
588
00:49:03,380 --> 00:49:04,880
- Come show me.
- You like it?
589
00:49:06,255 --> 00:49:07,713
- You're so bad.
590
00:49:09,338 --> 00:49:13,255
What a man wants is an
illusion of what a woman is.
591
00:49:13,880 --> 00:49:15,630
What a man and a woman are together.
592
00:49:17,755 --> 00:49:19,963
- Any less of
an illusion, your idea?
593
00:49:20,547 --> 00:49:21,338
- What's that?
594
00:49:22,505 --> 00:49:23,713
- That all men are alike.
595
00:49:24,380 --> 00:49:25,213
I'm exactly the same as Doug.
596
00:49:25,505 --> 00:49:26,213
Doug's exactly the same as-
597
00:49:26,505 --> 00:49:28,255
- All men are alike
598
00:49:29,255 --> 00:49:31,755
in certain fundamental respects.
599
00:49:32,380 --> 00:49:33,963
I speak from experience.
600
00:49:35,547 --> 00:49:39,463
Two bad marriages, oount
'em, before I was 27.
601
00:49:40,547 --> 00:49:42,963
There are some variations, but...
602
00:49:43,255 --> 00:49:44,505
they don't amount to much.
603
00:49:46,547 --> 00:49:47,338
Except for...
604
00:49:54,672 --> 00:49:56,338
- I want you to sit for me.
605
00:49:58,755 --> 00:50:00,713
I want you to see yourself as I see you.
606
00:50:06,130 --> 00:50:09,338
- Except for what?
- Nothing.
607
00:50:18,505 --> 00:50:20,755
You really don't have to
bother with that, you know?
608
00:50:24,297 --> 00:50:25,130
- What's that?
609
00:50:25,505 --> 00:50:27,088
- The towel, covering up.
610
00:50:28,005 --> 00:50:29,463
I'm afraid I'm not very modest.
611
00:50:30,380 --> 00:50:33,005
Uh, I actually prefer it with nothing on.
612
00:50:33,630 --> 00:50:35,088
That's how Doug always does it.
613
00:50:35,630 --> 00:50:37,338
- Yeah, but Doug
can get away with it.
614
00:50:38,755 --> 00:50:40,255
- Get, get away with it, hovf?
615
00:50:41,130 --> 00:50:42,213
- Being 93)'-
616
00:50:46,255 --> 00:50:47,630
- Gay?
- Doug.
617
00:50:49,255 --> 00:50:51,713
You knew he was gay.
- Of course.
618
00:50:52,922 --> 00:50:55,880
- He said you did.
- Yeah, sure.
619
00:50:57,297 --> 00:50:59,463
- He's usually
very upfront about it.
620
00:51:00,672 --> 00:51:01,713
- Very upfront.
621
00:51:10,922 --> 00:51:12,213
- That's how he and I met.
622
00:51:13,630 --> 00:51:14,630
He thought I was gay.
623
00:51:16,422 --> 00:51:17,880
Well, actually a friend
of his I worked on,
624
00:51:18,130 --> 00:51:19,213
he thought I was gay.
625
00:51:19,630 --> 00:51:22,005
- You're not?
- No.
626
00:51:23,755 --> 00:51:27,088
But Doug thinks everybody's
gay. That's part of his charm.
627
00:51:29,255 --> 00:51:32,088
I think he's bisexual
in some half-assed way.
628
00:51:34,047 --> 00:51:35,130
- Nevertheless.
629
00:51:37,005 --> 00:51:39,005
- What?
- Still?
630
00:51:39,422 --> 00:51:41,380
- Yeah?
- The towel.
631
00:52:22,172 --> 00:52:24,630
- If you're ever interested in
something a little different,
632
00:52:25,005 --> 00:52:26,838
you might like to try shiatsu.
633
00:52:28,422 --> 00:52:29,838
It's all about stimulating...
634
00:52:31,422 --> 00:52:33,380
energies in different parts of the body.
635
00:52:37,380 --> 00:52:40,088
No oil used at all.
636
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:43,838
Skin rarely touches skin.
637
00:52:57,130 --> 00:52:58,713
- You're getting pretty good at this.
638
00:52:59,422 --> 00:53:01,755
You better be careful or you'll spoil me.
639
00:53:04,922 --> 00:53:05,880
- And ifl do?
640
00:53:07,505 --> 00:53:08,838
- Well, you're the one
who's gonna have to live
641
00:53:09,130 --> 00:53:10,588
with the consequences.
642
00:53:15,047 --> 00:53:15,963
- I'll risk it.
643
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:21,505
- I tried it once.
644
00:53:27,213 --> 00:53:29,130
Tell me about your family, Fitch.
645
00:53:29,922 --> 00:53:32,505
- My family?
- Your family, now gone.
646
00:53:33,755 --> 00:53:35,088
- There's not much to tell.
647
00:53:36,422 --> 00:53:37,880
- What was your father?
648
00:53:40,880 --> 00:53:43,880
- Executive. Ad man.
649
00:53:45,630 --> 00:53:47,130
My father's family had money.
650
00:53:48,172 --> 00:53:51,838
My mother's side too.
Not a lot, but money.
651
00:53:53,755 --> 00:53:56,463
Comfortable would be how
they described themselves.
652
00:54:00,630 --> 00:54:02,713
We used to do things
like dress for dinner...
653
00:54:04,255 --> 00:54:05,338
on a Saturday night.
654
00:54:05,630 --> 00:54:06,838
- Sounds like fun.
655
00:54:08,422 --> 00:54:10,130
- Sometimes we'd have guests.
656
00:54:10,880 --> 00:54:12,338
Someone from my father's agency,
657
00:54:12,755 --> 00:54:15,838
some client and his wife.
658
00:54:18,172 --> 00:54:19,880
But usually it was just the family.
659
00:54:21,380 --> 00:54:24,088
My parents, my sister and me.
660
00:54:27,380 --> 00:54:31,255
It's funny talking about roles.
661
00:54:33,047 --> 00:54:35,755
My parents had these roles,
which they seem to inhabit.
662
00:54:38,255 --> 00:54:39,463
You can get up now.
663
00:54:49,547 --> 00:54:51,463
My father, the shrewd businessman,
664
00:54:51,755 --> 00:54:54,088
my mother, the thoughtful
patron of the arts.
665
00:54:58,130 --> 00:55:00,588
Which as it turned out,
was a kind of fiction.
666
00:55:03,297 --> 00:55:04,088
_ HOW?
667
00:55:06,005 --> 00:55:06,963
- Well, it was all the same to her.
668
00:55:07,255 --> 00:55:09,588
Classical music, classical art.
669
00:55:10,672 --> 00:55:13,255
Didn't matter who or what
it was. It was all lovely.
670
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:17,463
The woman, and I've
almost come to admire this
671
00:55:17,755 --> 00:55:19,005
about her over the years,
672
00:55:19,755 --> 00:55:21,630
didn't have a critical bone in her body.
673
00:55:23,880 --> 00:55:26,755
She was the type of person
they created public television for.
674
00:55:27,755 --> 00:55:29,213
One night, it was one of these...
675
00:55:30,630 --> 00:55:31,755
Saturday night deals
676
00:55:32,047 --> 00:55:33,630
and there was a very
important client coming.
677
00:55:35,630 --> 00:55:38,463
All the men were supposed
to wear a black tie.
678
00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:42,338
About 1O minutes before
the guests were to arrive,
679
00:55:43,672 --> 00:55:45,588
I came downstairs dressed and ready.
680
00:55:48,172 --> 00:55:51,088
My father took one look at me,
681
00:55:52,755 --> 00:55:54,838
and let's say he wasn't pleased.
682
00:55:55,755 --> 00:55:59,088
- Why?
- It was my bow tie.
683
00:56:00,505 --> 00:56:02,880
He said that by wearing one
of those clip-on bow ties,
684
00:56:03,172 --> 00:56:05,630
I was humiliating him beyond humiliation.
685
00:56:07,130 --> 00:56:11,963
He said that, "A real
gentleman ties his own tie.
686
00:56:12,297 --> 00:56:13,963
You look like a bus boy."
687
00:56:17,172 --> 00:56:18,380
- That's nice.
688
00:56:18,672 --> 00:56:21,213
You were how old?
- 17.
689
00:56:22,505 --> 00:56:25,213
But he wasn't ranting, you
have to understand. Never.
690
00:56:25,880 --> 00:56:27,088
- What did you do?
691
00:56:28,047 --> 00:56:29,255
- I pulled the tie apart.
692
00:56:30,130 --> 00:56:30,880
- What do you mean?
693
00:56:31,255 --> 00:56:32,963
- Well, it wasn't a clip-on, you see.
694
00:56:33,672 --> 00:56:36,088
It was one of your
standard J Press bow ties.
695
00:56:37,380 --> 00:56:41,213
I'd tied it so well,
I'd done it so perfectly
696
00:56:42,172 --> 00:56:43,338
that it looked too good.
697
00:56:45,172 --> 00:56:46,713
- What did he do then?
698
00:56:47,255 --> 00:56:48,880
- He told me to re-tie it.
699
00:56:53,130 --> 00:56:53,963
Re-tie it.
700
00:57:17,505 --> 00:57:19,213
- That's it?
- That's it.
701
00:57:20,630 --> 00:57:22,588
- No apologies, or...
702
00:57:24,047 --> 00:57:25,713
And you weren't angry?
- No.
703
00:57:26,380 --> 00:57:27,255
On your side.
704
00:57:27,630 --> 00:57:30,463
- Not at all?
- Wasn't about anger.
705
00:57:32,630 --> 00:57:33,755
- What was it about?
706
00:57:38,005 --> 00:57:41,755
- Responsibilities. Expectations.
707
00:57:42,672 --> 00:57:44,713
My mother, my father,
they were trapped.
708
00:57:46,255 --> 00:57:49,213
Trapped by their
responsibilities to things
709
00:57:49,505 --> 00:57:50,588
that they never thought twice about.
710
00:57:50,838 --> 00:57:54,713
Trapped by their own
expectations of themselves.
711
00:57:57,297 --> 00:57:58,630
- I don't know anyone who doesn't feel
712
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:01,505
some sort of ambivalence
toward their parents.
713
00:58:02,047 --> 00:58:03,713
They are who they are.
714
00:58:04,047 --> 00:58:05,630
You are who they are.
715
00:58:06,255 --> 00:58:07,505
But then again, you're not.
716
00:58:08,630 --> 00:58:09,963
- I wasn't ambivalent about them.
717
00:58:10,255 --> 00:58:11,505
Not at all. I liked them.
718
00:58:13,505 --> 00:58:15,838
I totally accepted who they were.
719
00:58:17,130 --> 00:58:18,588
Maybe even more than they did.
720
00:58:42,672 --> 00:58:46,713
- Angels keep their ancient places,
721
00:58:47,130 --> 00:58:49,338
Turn but a stone and start a wing.
722
00:58:49,880 --> 00:58:50,755
- What is that?
723
00:58:51,130 --> 00:58:53,588
- I don't know. lt'sjust
this poem I once knew.
724
00:58:54,422 --> 00:58:56,338
It's funny how I just remembered it.
725
00:59:03,630 --> 00:59:04,755
They're the same. Did you know that?
726
00:59:05,047 --> 00:59:06,338
Those two songs.
727
00:59:07,422 --> 00:59:09,963
"Streets of Laredo" and
"St. James Infirmary."
728
00:59:11,255 --> 00:59:12,880
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
729
00:59:14,130 --> 00:59:15,713
It started out as the
same song, and then
730
00:59:15,963 --> 00:59:18,713
just over the years,
went in different places.
731
00:59:20,297 --> 00:59:23,255
See? Out of one place, a lot
of different things could come.
732
00:59:27,005 --> 00:59:31,005
- With my family, my
parents, it was more, what?
733
00:59:31,797 --> 00:59:33,338
Being invisible, I guess.
734
00:59:34,297 --> 00:59:36,213
My father was an engineer,
735
00:59:36,672 --> 00:59:39,630
and he used to invent all these
things that you'd never see.
736
00:59:40,380 --> 00:59:42,838
Things that went inside these
huge industrial machines
737
00:59:43,088 --> 00:59:46,713
to make them run faster, smoother, safer.
738
00:59:48,047 --> 00:59:50,463
But he never owned any of his inventions.
739
00:59:50,755 --> 00:59:51,880
His company did.
740
00:59:52,505 --> 00:59:54,713
So he never made any
real money to speak of.
741
00:59:55,630 --> 00:59:58,463
And the things he created
went inside other things. So,
742
00:59:58,755 --> 01:00:01,588
no one outside that oompany
even knew who he was.
743
01:00:03,672 --> 01:00:05,380
Hejust did his thing.
744
01:00:07,880 --> 01:00:09,338
- Maybe he liked it that way.
745
01:00:10,880 --> 01:00:12,838
Maybe he didn't want any recognition.
746
01:00:13,797 --> 01:00:15,380
- Everyone wants recognition.
747
01:00:20,505 --> 01:00:22,255
- The Hopis have a word for it.
748
01:00:22,922 --> 01:00:25,380
Pinu'u. It means I am I.
749
01:00:27,380 --> 01:00:30,005
- With my mother, it was
pretty much the same thing.
750
01:00:30,880 --> 01:00:32,713
She had one of the only acceptable jobs
751
01:00:33,005 --> 01:00:34,463
a woman had in those days.
752
01:00:35,005 --> 01:00:36,713
A nurse, and a good one.
753
01:00:39,172 --> 01:00:42,338
But like most other nurses,
she was completely ignored,
754
01:00:43,297 --> 01:00:46,213
totally stepped on by every
doctor she ever worked with.
755
01:00:48,047 --> 01:00:49,880
It used to break my heart to see it,
756
01:00:50,505 --> 01:00:51,588
two people like that.
757
01:00:53,255 --> 01:00:55,713
As gifted as they were, as caring.
758
01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:58,463
I swore I wouldn't live that way.
759
01:01:02,755 --> 01:01:05,255
Which is what led me to Andy, I suppose.
760
01:01:08,297 --> 01:01:09,963
He was on the faculty
of the art department
761
01:01:10,255 --> 01:01:11,838
at the oollege I was going to.
762
01:01:13,005 --> 01:01:15,630
For someone like me, a small town girl,
763
01:01:15,922 --> 01:01:19,713
18, anonymous,
it was liberation.
764
01:01:21,255 --> 01:01:23,380
It took three years,
but we finally did it.
765
01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:25,588
Got married.
766
01:01:26,380 --> 01:01:28,130
My parents weren't very pleased.
767
01:01:31,505 --> 01:01:32,838
- How long were you married?
768
01:01:34,297 --> 01:01:36,255
- Hmm, good question. Let's see.
769
01:01:37,380 --> 01:01:38,630
Two, three weeks, anyway.
770
01:01:39,130 --> 01:01:39,963
- What happened?
771
01:01:41,505 --> 01:01:44,213
- Well, as popular as my
husband was on campus,
772
01:01:44,463 --> 01:01:46,463
he was revered south of the border.
773
01:01:47,422 --> 01:01:50,880
And hard as it is to believe
today, I didn't have a clue.
774
01:02:03,422 --> 01:02:04,713
- Hey, where you goin'?
775
01:02:05,505 --> 01:02:06,338
- Hey-
776
01:02:08,505 --> 01:02:09,463
- It's all there. Go.
777
01:02:11,255 --> 01:02:13,963
- I was 18, 19, 20. I was a child.
778
01:02:21,047 --> 01:02:22,713
- Eager for attention.
779
01:02:24,255 --> 01:02:27,630
- Andy was charming. But the
truth is he wasn't very smart.
780
01:02:28,172 --> 01:02:30,338
Made one too many trips through customs.
781
01:02:33,130 --> 01:02:34,130
- All right, sign this.
782
01:02:36,880 --> 01:02:38,755
I can give him the forms
on Kevin Locke.
783
01:02:39,130 --> 01:02:39,713
- Sit here and wait.
784
01:02:50,130 --> 01:02:52,963
- I guess I should be grateful
it wasn't on our honeymoon.
785
01:02:55,172 --> 01:02:57,213
Yeah, I did it for attention. Sure.
786
01:02:59,005 --> 01:03:01,255
Which can't be said
about my seoond husband.
787
01:03:02,297 --> 01:03:04,713
'Cause I took my parents'
advice after that.
788
01:03:05,172 --> 01:03:08,588
Settled down with a decent,
honorable, hardworking boy.
789
01:03:09,630 --> 01:03:11,130
It was like a four year nap.
790
01:03:14,505 --> 01:03:16,088
They were mistakes.
791
01:03:16,922 --> 01:03:19,463
- But you learned from 'em.
- Not really.
792
01:03:20,755 --> 01:03:21,588
Well, maybe.
793
01:03:22,630 --> 01:03:24,380
I did decide that the only men
794
01:03:24,630 --> 01:03:26,630
you should ever seriously
oonsider marrying
795
01:03:26,880 --> 01:03:28,880
are those who already are.
796
01:03:29,297 --> 01:03:31,880
For the most part, they've
had some experience on it.
797
01:03:37,047 --> 01:03:38,463
- Let's take a break.
798
01:03:51,630 --> 01:03:55,588
Heat, like a hot bath can
sometimes stimulate or relax.
799
01:03:57,880 --> 01:04:00,630
This is the kind of Japanese
acupuncture where we use heat...
800
01:04:01,380 --> 01:04:02,838
instead of needles.
801
01:04:03,880 --> 01:04:05,213
And we put it on here,
802
01:04:08,380 --> 01:04:10,838
and we put it on here for nervous tension.
803
01:04:15,880 --> 01:04:17,213
- So how about you?
804
01:04:18,422 --> 01:04:19,588
- How about me what?
805
01:04:20,922 --> 01:04:21,963
Married?
806
01:04:23,255 --> 01:04:24,213
No.
807
01:04:24,922 --> 01:04:27,505
- Never?
- Never.
808
01:04:27,922 --> 01:04:28,713
- Close?
809
01:04:30,380 --> 01:04:32,838
- Maybe, I suppose so.
Depends how close you mean.
810
01:04:34,797 --> 01:04:38,713
- A serious relationship,
a meaningful relationship.
811
01:04:39,505 --> 01:04:41,463
You've had one of those, I would hope.
812
01:04:41,880 --> 01:04:43,338
- I would hope so.
813
01:04:44,130 --> 01:04:46,963
- Nothing that stirred
the old conjugal instinct?
814
01:04:47,505 --> 01:04:48,755
- An instinct. ls that what it is?
815
01:04:49,255 --> 01:04:51,088
- The desire to mate? Sure.
816
01:04:51,422 --> 01:04:53,838
- The desire to mate is
not the desire to marry.
817
01:04:55,505 --> 01:04:56,713
- No, I suppose not.
818
01:04:57,755 --> 01:04:59,255
- No more than standing in a firing squad
819
01:04:59,547 --> 01:05:01,838
is the same as standing in
front of a firing squad.
820
01:05:03,380 --> 01:05:04,130
- Right.
821
01:05:05,130 --> 01:05:06,213
- What's getting married about, anyway?
822
01:05:06,505 --> 01:05:09,755
Two people swept up in
some out of control,
823
01:05:10,047 --> 01:05:12,088
delusive kind of passion, swearing to God
824
01:05:12,380 --> 01:05:14,338
they're gonna stay that way
for the rest of their lives.
825
01:05:14,880 --> 01:05:16,880
- Oh, so you're a romantic.
826
01:05:18,255 --> 01:05:19,713
- For me, what comes out of an experience
827
01:05:20,005 --> 01:05:22,713
isn't nearly so interesting
as the experience itself.
828
01:05:31,380 --> 01:05:33,755
How many people know passion?
I mean, really know it?
829
01:05:36,255 --> 01:05:37,005
- Who was she?
830
01:05:39,130 --> 01:05:40,088
How'd you meet her?
831
01:05:49,672 --> 01:05:51,880
- I was running from
myself and she wasn't.
832
01:05:54,797 --> 01:05:57,088
Some people from the
moment they're born...
833
01:05:57,755 --> 01:05:58,880
know what their destiny is.
834
01:05:59,130 --> 01:06:00,005
They live with it.
835
01:06:01,880 --> 01:06:03,338
It's as much a part of them...
836
01:06:04,630 --> 01:06:06,338
as the color of their eyes.
837
01:06:06,755 --> 01:06:07,713
- Is it on?
838
01:06:09,755 --> 01:06:10,505
- It's on.
839
01:06:11,255 --> 01:06:12,838
- Okay, don't look.
840
01:06:17,255 --> 01:06:22,213
J' I went down to St. James Infirmary J'
841
01:06:23,005 --> 01:06:26,713
J' To see my baby there J'
842
01:06:27,130 --> 01:06:28,713
J' She was stretched out J'
843
01:06:29,255 --> 01:06:32,588
J' On a long white table J'
844
01:06:32,880 --> 01:06:37,213
J' So cold, so pale, so fair J'
845
01:06:38,380 --> 01:06:40,130
- But it makes them a little old too.
846
01:06:42,755 --> 01:06:44,338
It's because they understand.
847
01:06:45,130 --> 01:06:48,213
- Understand what?
- Everything.
848
01:06:55,755 --> 01:06:56,838
- You're rich.
849
01:06:58,672 --> 01:07:02,005
It's not your fault.
That's why you're here.
850
01:07:04,255 --> 01:07:06,880
Because you can afford to
run away from your problems.
851
01:07:15,755 --> 01:07:17,588
- So what happened to her?
852
01:08:16,422 --> 01:08:19,713
- People drift apart.
- Not always.
853
01:08:20,880 --> 01:08:21,963
- More often than not.
854
01:08:23,797 --> 01:08:25,338
You get to a point of knowing a person,
855
01:08:25,630 --> 01:08:27,380
then you start asking what's left.
856
01:08:28,422 --> 01:08:31,130
- Well, maybe you just think
you've gotten to that point.
857
01:08:31,505 --> 01:08:32,963
- Well, that's what I've found.
858
01:08:34,505 --> 01:08:35,505
At some point,
859
01:08:36,047 --> 01:08:38,963
you just realize there are not
going to be any more surprises.
860
01:08:43,463 --> 01:08:45,713
- Just decide what it
is you want me to do.
861
01:08:49,922 --> 01:08:51,963
Just decide and tell me.
862
01:08:52,922 --> 01:08:56,755
- And you like surprises?
Or is it variety?
863
01:09:00,380 --> 01:09:03,588
I don't. I don't like surprises.
864
01:09:03,880 --> 01:09:05,338
I don't like variety.
865
01:09:06,672 --> 01:09:08,588
Variety is some guy in
a leather jockstrap,
866
01:09:08,880 --> 01:09:10,588
whdsjust had his nipples pierced.
867
01:09:11,755 --> 01:09:13,380
Don't think I haven't dated them.
868
01:09:21,505 --> 01:09:22,630
I guess I shouldn't blame people
869
01:09:22,922 --> 01:09:24,130
for what they think of me,
870
01:09:25,005 --> 01:09:26,630
no more than I blame myself.
871
01:09:43,130 --> 01:09:45,963
- I'm seeing something for
the first time looking at you.
872
01:09:46,797 --> 01:09:47,588
- What's that?
873
01:09:49,755 --> 01:09:50,505
- An empty room.
874
01:09:52,380 --> 01:09:53,213
A locked door.
875
01:10:03,880 --> 01:10:07,005
- So much of what people do
is just invention anyway.
876
01:10:07,755 --> 01:10:11,588
Inventing themselves.
Inventing their friendships.
877
01:10:13,130 --> 01:10:16,838
- Is that what you did? Invent yourself.
878
01:10:18,255 --> 01:10:19,213
- Didn't you?
879
01:10:20,297 --> 01:10:23,130
Poor little rich boy run
off to join the Indians?
880
01:10:25,297 --> 01:10:28,880
- You know, the most
dangerous thing in the world
881
01:10:29,505 --> 01:10:31,838
is to think you've got
time to play it safe.
882
01:10:47,755 --> 01:10:49,255
- Is that what it seems like?
883
01:10:51,505 --> 01:10:52,755
- It's what it is.
884
01:10:58,755 --> 01:10:59,755
Where do you show?
885
01:11:01,755 --> 01:11:02,880
- Where do I show?
886
01:11:08,172 --> 01:11:10,213
- We're alike, I guess, you and me.
887
01:11:15,130 --> 01:11:16,713
- You know nothing about me.
888
01:11:17,422 --> 01:11:20,880
- Don't I?
- Not a thing.
889
01:11:21,380 --> 01:11:24,463
- I know self-indulgence
is not self-fulfillment.
890
01:11:24,880 --> 01:11:27,380
- At least I don't
go hiding behind things.
891
01:11:28,380 --> 01:11:31,005
- Yes, you do. In the worst possible way.
892
01:11:31,297 --> 01:11:32,338
You hide behind your soul,
893
01:11:32,630 --> 01:11:35,005
behind all this ooga booga bullshit.
894
01:11:46,047 --> 01:11:49,963
Am I really an empty room?
- Yes.
895
01:12:05,255 --> 01:12:06,713
- Even now?
896
01:12:53,255 --> 01:12:54,963
- Is this how Doug does it?
897
01:12:56,255 --> 01:12:57,213
- Excuse me?
898
01:13:30,755 --> 01:13:34,130
- Maybe the whole
thing's a question of perception.
899
01:13:35,672 --> 01:13:36,755
- What is?
900
01:13:37,797 --> 01:13:39,338
- Well, it's not
the way people see you
901
01:13:39,630 --> 01:13:40,213
that's the problem.
902
01:13:40,505 --> 01:13:42,588
It's the way you see them seeing you.
903
01:13:43,380 --> 01:13:44,338
- How do you mean?
904
01:13:45,172 --> 01:13:48,755
- Like, Doug. He said you were,
the word he used was adrift.
905
01:13:50,880 --> 01:13:54,130
But he never said whether you
were single or not single.
906
01:13:54,422 --> 01:13:55,505
He never said anything at all
907
01:13:55,755 --> 01:13:57,713
beyond the initial observation, that is.
908
01:13:59,505 --> 01:14:01,213
- I'm not sure I follow you.
909
01:14:04,255 --> 01:14:06,130
- You like things, nice things.
910
01:14:07,880 --> 01:14:08,588
-Ido.
911
01:14:09,880 --> 01:14:12,838
- And you have
nice things. Lots of them.
912
01:14:13,172 --> 01:14:13,963
- A few.
913
01:14:16,005 --> 01:14:17,880
- But you feel like a failure.
914
01:14:19,380 --> 01:14:21,505
- Did I say that?
- Don't you?
915
01:14:23,630 --> 01:14:24,838
- You're gonna pull out your crystals
916
01:14:25,130 --> 01:14:26,588
and tell me I'm of two hearts?
917
01:14:28,630 --> 01:14:31,963
- No, but what I believe
918
01:14:32,255 --> 01:14:34,088
is not ooga booga bullshit.
919
01:14:36,922 --> 01:14:39,005
It comes from firsthand experience.
920
01:14:42,630 --> 01:14:45,880
There are people who
have lots of possessions,
921
01:14:46,172 --> 01:14:47,713
and they're made miserable by them.
922
01:14:48,755 --> 01:14:50,963
- And there are people who
live in refrigerator crates
923
01:14:51,213 --> 01:14:52,963
who would trade places in a second.
924
01:14:53,422 --> 01:14:56,630
I buy things, I admit it.
But I'm not a materialist.
925
01:14:57,005 --> 01:14:59,963
Not really, because to
me, things are things.
926
01:15:00,255 --> 01:15:01,130
They mean nothing.
927
01:15:02,047 --> 01:15:04,713
- That's not true. They carry memories.
928
01:15:05,005 --> 01:15:08,630
That's what makes them meaningful.
There's a link to people.
929
01:15:10,255 --> 01:15:12,338
- All I do is I usually
end up just...
930
01:15:12,630 --> 01:15:15,963
frustrated by the conspicuous
consumption, angry even.
931
01:15:17,255 --> 01:15:19,588
- That's because you think
that whatever you are buying
932
01:15:19,838 --> 01:15:22,588
is going to make you younger
or happier or sexier.
933
01:15:23,047 --> 01:15:24,630
- I see what you're doing, you know.
934
01:15:25,005 --> 01:15:27,213
You're trying to convince
me how miserable I am.
935
01:15:27,505 --> 01:15:28,380
- And am I succeeding?
936
01:15:28,630 --> 01:15:30,213
- No, you'rejust pissing me off.
937
01:15:30,505 --> 01:15:31,213
- And why is that?
938
01:15:31,547 --> 01:15:34,213
- Because unlike you, I
wasn't given anything.
939
01:15:34,672 --> 01:15:37,130
And I'm not talking about money, notjust.
940
01:15:37,755 --> 01:15:39,713
Everything I own, everything I have,
941
01:15:40,005 --> 01:15:41,463
I earned in one way or another.
942
01:15:41,755 --> 01:15:42,588
So don't tell me I'm wrong.
943
01:15:42,838 --> 01:15:44,213
Don't tell me I'm immoral
944
01:15:44,505 --> 01:15:47,088
because I chose to make something
of my life and you didn't.
945
01:15:47,505 --> 01:15:49,588
I mean, shouldn't a man
your age be something?
946
01:15:50,130 --> 01:15:51,963
- I know you've made
something of your life.
947
01:15:52,255 --> 01:15:54,463
I'm just asking you what that is.
948
01:15:54,755 --> 01:15:57,463
- No, you're not. Not anymore.
949
01:16:01,755 --> 01:16:04,255
And I'm not talking about money, notjust.
950
01:16:04,505 --> 01:16:05,338
Really?
951
01:16:06,797 --> 01:16:08,713
The difference is you've
spent so much time
952
01:16:09,005 --> 01:16:10,505
completely rationalizing your life
953
01:16:10,797 --> 01:16:12,255
that you actually believe it.
954
01:16:13,255 --> 01:16:14,963
You're a very lonely man, Fitch.
955
01:16:16,255 --> 01:16:17,380
- You let him touch you.
956
01:16:20,255 --> 01:16:20,880
" Who?
957
01:16:21,838 --> 01:16:23,380
- You expect him to touch you.
958
01:16:24,672 --> 01:16:26,130
- Expect who to?
959
01:16:26,422 --> 01:16:28,005
- That's what it's about,
isn't it? Doug and you?
960
01:16:28,297 --> 01:16:29,797
It's about sex, isn't it?
961
01:16:34,588 --> 01:16:35,380
- I don't know.
962
01:16:39,047 --> 01:16:40,880
Did he say something to you? Douglas?
963
01:16:43,963 --> 01:16:47,297
Christ. That obvious, huh?
964
01:16:51,297 --> 01:16:53,255
I know it doesn't mean anything to him.
965
01:16:53,588 --> 01:16:54,630
He's very discreet.
966
01:16:58,422 --> 01:17:00,672
It's not like he does anything
more than touch me.
967
01:17:03,672 --> 01:17:05,755
It's about as safe as sex gets these days.
968
01:17:09,672 --> 01:17:12,880
I try to be too. Discreet.
969
01:17:13,297 --> 01:17:14,380
We never talk about it.
970
01:17:15,797 --> 01:17:18,005
We just pretend it's part of the massage.
971
01:17:18,672 --> 01:17:19,755
- Which it is.
972
01:17:22,088 --> 01:17:24,297
- All relationships
are a form of currency,
973
01:17:24,588 --> 01:17:26,505
I've oome to the unfortunate conclusion.
974
01:17:27,838 --> 01:17:30,255
I'm using you just like you're using me,
975
01:17:30,672 --> 01:17:33,630
using you, using me,
and on and on it goes.
976
01:17:35,422 --> 01:17:39,630
The money part, it's at least honest.
977
01:17:42,172 --> 01:17:43,255
Hi, this is Nina.
978
01:17:43,505 --> 01:17:44,255
At the sound of the tone,
979
01:17:44,547 --> 01:17:45,630
the voice you hear will be your own.
980
01:17:47,047 --> 01:17:48,505
- Hey, Nina, you there?
981
01:17:49,047 --> 01:17:50,713
Hey, it's, uh, me, Douglas.
982
01:17:52,547 --> 01:17:53,422
- You gonna answer?
983
01:17:54,547 --> 01:17:56,380
- Listen, uh, sorry about the switch,
984
01:17:56,672 --> 01:17:59,922
but, um, something came up and, uh,
985
01:18:00,172 --> 01:18:01,380
actually I was just kind of calling to see
986
01:18:01,630 --> 01:18:03,005
if Fitch made it by there.
987
01:18:03,255 --> 01:18:04,005
Look, I know you'll really like him.
988
01:18:04,297 --> 01:18:06,380
He's a really decent
guy and, uh,
989
01:18:06,922 --> 01:18:08,672
I don't know, maybe he's
already been there and left.
990
01:18:09,422 --> 01:18:12,505
So, uh, anyway, I will see
you same time next week.
991
01:18:12,797 --> 01:18:14,505
Okay, same place. All right.
992
01:18:14,922 --> 01:18:16,505
Ciao, Bella. Bye-bye.
993
01:18:17,547 --> 01:18:19,172
Thanks, can you stow that for me?
994
01:18:21,172 --> 01:18:22,005
Are you mad?
995
01:18:23,672 --> 01:18:24,630
Don't be upset.
996
01:18:25,713 --> 01:18:27,380
You're tense. Don't be tense.
997
01:18:34,297 --> 01:18:36,422
- Well, I can't say this is
the most relaxing massage
998
01:18:36,713 --> 01:18:37,630
I've ever had.
999
01:18:38,463 --> 01:18:39,422
- But is the best.
1000
01:18:45,797 --> 01:18:47,630
- I wasn't being totally honest.
1001
01:18:48,047 --> 01:18:48,880
- About what?
1002
01:18:50,547 --> 01:18:52,922
- Men. Men and me.
1003
01:18:55,338 --> 01:18:56,880
As much as I choose not to believe it,
1004
01:18:57,172 --> 01:18:59,755
the truth is I've been
involved with a lot of them.
1005
01:19:00,422 --> 01:19:02,922
Always more of the same, sorry to say.
1006
01:19:07,463 --> 01:19:08,797
At the middle of last year,
1007
01:19:10,422 --> 01:19:12,505
this man suddenly came into my life.
1008
01:19:13,172 --> 01:19:16,005
Or I guess if I was being
totally honest with myself,
1009
01:19:16,963 --> 01:19:18,630
I came into his.
1010
01:19:22,047 --> 01:19:22,922
An artist.
1011
01:19:24,088 --> 01:19:25,130
You have to understand,
1012
01:19:25,422 --> 01:19:28,172
in my world so much is done for effect.
1013
01:19:29,338 --> 01:19:31,755
And here was someone who
did nothing for effect.
1014
01:19:32,922 --> 01:19:35,672
He was who he was. No apologies.
1015
01:19:36,838 --> 01:19:37,880
He treated me well.
1016
01:19:38,963 --> 01:19:40,755
Very well. Better than I treated him.
1017
01:19:43,047 --> 01:19:45,422
And all he expected in return
1018
01:19:45,797 --> 01:19:46,922
was for me to be me.
1019
01:19:48,547 --> 01:19:49,297
Even now?
1020
01:19:53,547 --> 01:19:54,505
- Especially now.
1021
01:19:56,547 --> 01:19:58,922
In some strange way, you're pretending.
1022
01:19:59,297 --> 01:20:01,505
Liking my work, being involved with me
1023
01:20:01,797 --> 01:20:04,297
and wanting to go to bed with
me right now, at everything.
1024
01:20:04,588 --> 01:20:05,422
- No.
1025
01:20:05,838 --> 01:20:09,130
- But you couldn't give yourself up.
1026
01:20:41,088 --> 01:20:42,380
- It's been a long time.
1027
01:20:44,047 --> 01:20:47,505
Long time since my various
husbands blew through my life.
1028
01:20:49,172 --> 01:20:52,797
But still, too much stuff.
1029
01:20:55,172 --> 01:20:57,547
You don't wanna admit how
much people affect you,
1030
01:20:57,922 --> 01:20:58,880
but they do.
1031
01:21:02,463 --> 01:21:04,630
- Maybe you should. Maybe that's the key.
1032
01:21:08,172 --> 01:21:11,047
Admitting just how much
they are with you still.
1033
01:21:13,797 --> 01:21:16,255
- We are alike, aren't we, Fitch?
1034
01:21:48,172 --> 01:21:51,380
- I saw them go out of control
around the blind corner.
1035
01:21:55,297 --> 01:21:56,255
- Oh, Lordy.
1036
01:21:57,713 --> 01:21:59,130
- There's a woman in there.
1037
01:21:59,797 --> 01:22:01,255
Miss? Miss?
1038
01:22:01,672 --> 01:22:02,547
Miss, you okay?
1039
01:22:02,797 --> 01:22:04,005
Miss? Miss?
1040
01:22:04,672 --> 01:22:05,130
Shit...
1041
01:22:10,797 --> 01:22:12,630
- Uh, Roger, we're about,
uh, two miles south
1042
01:22:12,880 --> 01:22:14,630
of Culver Ranch here on Route 4.
1043
01:22:14,922 --> 01:22:15,755
Uh, we're gonna be
heading down the highway.
1044
01:22:16,047 --> 01:22:17,255
We got one fatality.
1045
01:22:17,505 --> 01:22:20,880
Female, uh, transporting
to county hospital, over.
1046
01:22:21,130 --> 01:22:23,630
- Copy, Route 4, one fatality, female.
1047
01:22:23,963 --> 01:22:25,672
- Close her up.
- Alright, yeah.
1048
01:22:26,213 --> 01:22:28,422
- We're gonna need a tow truck down here.
1049
01:22:28,672 --> 01:22:30,380
Probably down there you can miss that turn
1050
01:22:30,672 --> 01:22:32,380
where the lady, she was coming
down here, you know.
1051
01:22:37,672 --> 01:22:39,505
- I came to a place not long ago.
1052
01:22:41,422 --> 01:22:42,880
It was a lonely place.
1053
01:22:44,797 --> 01:22:49,255
An empty place with no hope,
and I thought, no way out.
1054
01:22:51,713 --> 01:22:54,047
It's a place I oould have
been lost in forever.
1055
01:22:56,172 --> 01:22:58,297
But slowly I began to
understand something.
1056
01:22:59,463 --> 01:23:02,005
That I allowed myself
to stay in that place.
1057
01:23:02,463 --> 01:23:04,297
And it was up to me to get myself out.
1058
01:23:05,338 --> 01:23:08,630
And so I chose hope. I chose belief.
1059
01:24:14,213 --> 01:24:16,297
God has to be all things to all people.
1060
01:24:17,047 --> 01:24:21,922
To be anything less would
be less than perfect. Human.
1061
01:24:26,797 --> 01:24:28,880
What we believe in is
not nearly so important
1062
01:24:29,130 --> 01:24:30,380
as believing in something.
1063
01:24:32,547 --> 01:24:33,630
But you can't wait too long.
1064
01:24:33,922 --> 01:24:35,880
Or you may find yourself
believing in nothing.
1065
01:24:38,047 --> 01:24:40,422
How do you feel?
- Good.
1066
01:24:41,588 --> 01:24:42,380
Very good.
1067
01:24:48,213 --> 01:24:49,005
- Good.
1068
01:25:20,422 --> 01:25:22,005
- Was it 100 that I owed you?
1069
01:25:22,422 --> 01:25:23,130
- Did I say that?
1070
01:25:23,588 --> 01:25:25,297
- Oh, that's what Douglas charges me.
1071
01:25:25,588 --> 01:25:26,797
- Well, make it 5O then.
1072
01:25:27,297 --> 01:25:29,255
- Take it.
- Honestly.
1073
01:25:29,588 --> 01:25:31,380
- Take it.
- 75 Then.
1074
01:25:32,672 --> 01:25:35,422
- All right, 7s with a $25 tip.
1075
01:25:36,422 --> 01:25:38,130
- You do like getting
your own way, don't you?
1076
01:25:40,797 --> 01:25:41,797
- What's that?
1077
01:25:42,088 --> 01:25:43,380
- It's something we're all looking for.
1078
01:25:43,797 --> 01:25:44,380
- And that would be?
1079
01:25:44,672 --> 01:25:46,297
- Information.
- About you?
1080
01:25:46,797 --> 01:25:47,672
- About me and you.
1081
01:25:50,547 --> 01:25:54,505
Now I want you to think
about not dropping it.
1082
01:25:54,797 --> 01:25:56,505
And that's all I want you to think about.
1083
01:25:57,297 --> 01:25:58,505
- Not dropping it?
1084
01:25:58,922 --> 01:26:01,172
- Concentrate, try hard,
1085
01:26:01,547 --> 01:26:03,255
and by the time I count to 10,
1086
01:26:03,588 --> 01:26:04,797
it'll fall from your hand
1087
01:26:05,088 --> 01:26:06,630
and you'll have no power
over controlling it.
1088
01:26:07,172 --> 01:26:10,672
One, two, three, four, five.
1089
01:26:15,088 --> 01:26:15,755
Keep it.
1090
01:26:17,047 --> 01:26:18,422
- Where did you learn that?
1091
01:26:18,713 --> 01:26:20,797
- Saw it in a movie
once. I gotta be going.
1092
01:26:21,713 --> 01:26:23,505
- I'd like you to oome back next week.
1093
01:26:24,463 --> 01:26:26,755
- I'm flattered.
- I'm serious.
1094
01:26:27,172 --> 01:26:29,130
Same day?
- What about Doug?
1095
01:26:29,797 --> 01:26:30,672
- What about him?
1096
01:26:30,922 --> 01:26:32,547
- Well, I don't like taking his gig away.
1097
01:26:33,297 --> 01:26:36,172
- Douglas is young.
- So?
1098
01:26:37,088 --> 01:26:39,380
- So he'll find someone
to replace me with.
1099
01:26:39,922 --> 01:26:42,380
Women like him. That's what you said.
1100
01:26:42,797 --> 01:26:44,547
- Well, it's not as though
I don't want to come back.
1101
01:26:44,922 --> 01:26:45,755
- Do you?
1102
01:26:48,088 --> 01:26:50,630
- Yes.
- Then I'll talk to him.
1103
01:26:51,422 --> 01:26:52,630
I'll explain the situation.
1104
01:26:52,922 --> 01:26:54,755
If it's that big a problem,
I'll have you both oome.
1105
01:26:55,005 --> 01:26:56,880
Just not at the same time.
1106
01:26:59,422 --> 01:27:00,505
- Been nice meeting you.
1107
01:27:01,213 --> 01:27:02,547
I hope I wasn't too, um-
1108
01:27:02,838 --> 01:27:05,130
- What?
- Confrontational.
1109
01:27:08,588 --> 01:27:09,630
- Of course you were.
1110
01:27:11,047 --> 01:27:12,005
- I've gotta be off.
1111
01:28:47,172 --> 01:28:49,505
- Is it on?
- It's on.
1112
01:28:50,297 --> 01:28:51,797
- Okay, don't look.
1113
01:28:55,297 --> 01:29:00,130
J' I went down to St. James Infirmary J'
1114
01:29:01,338 --> 01:29:05,005
J' To see my baby there J'
1115
01:29:05,422 --> 01:29:07,297
J' She was stretched out J'
1116
01:29:07,672 --> 01:29:10,755
J' On a long white table J'
1117
01:29:11,297 --> 01:29:16,255
J' So cold, so pale, so fair J'
1118
01:29:16,922 --> 01:29:19,547
J' Let it go, let it go J'
1119
01:29:20,047 --> 01:29:22,047
J' God bless her J'
1120
01:29:23,172 --> 01:29:27,047
J' Wherever she may be J'
1121
01:29:27,422 --> 01:29:32,380
J' She can search the whole
wide world all over J'
1122
01:29:32,713 --> 01:29:34,380
J' She'll never find a man J'
1123
01:29:34,672 --> 01:29:38,172
J' As sweet as me J'
1124
01:29:39,588 --> 01:29:43,255
J' I went down to St. James lnf- J'
77122
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