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1
00:00:04,206 --> 00:00:06,840
Ooh. Somebody's working hard.
2
00:00:08,710 --> 00:00:11,978
Or are you doing that sexy
librarian thing I suggested?
3
00:00:13,115 --> 00:00:15,048
Shh, you.
4
00:00:15,150 --> 00:00:17,884
Come on. Say it in
French... biblioth?que.
5
00:00:22,624 --> 00:00:24,558
Look, I'm just... I'm
tutoring too many kids.
6
00:00:24,660 --> 00:00:27,027
I started with 3, and I'm up to 14.
7
00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:28,962
Yeah, we noticed at Outdoor
Man the conference room's
8
00:00:29,064 --> 00:00:32,465
getting pretty crowded
...uncomfortably crowded.
9
00:00:32,534 --> 00:00:34,334
Says Ed.
10
00:00:34,436 --> 00:00:37,170
Well, tell Ed I'm sorry,
11
00:00:37,272 --> 00:00:40,540
but it is test season
...SATs, ACTs, APs.
12
00:00:40,642 --> 00:00:42,742
And many more kids calling me every day.
13
00:00:42,845 --> 00:00:43,944
What am I supposed to do?
14
00:00:44,046 --> 00:00:49,049
Well... stand back and let some of
them flunk, and then we thin the herd.
15
00:00:49,151 --> 00:00:52,285
Honey, they need my help... Yeah.
16
00:00:52,354 --> 00:00:54,187
...and... and not just the
underprivileged ones... I get it.
17
00:00:54,256 --> 00:00:55,255
...that I tutor for free. Uh-huh.
18
00:00:55,324 --> 00:00:57,691
The wealthy parents are offering
me some pretty big money.
19
00:01:01,496 --> 00:01:05,532
Well, then stand back and enjoy
the view from Money Mountain.
20
00:01:06,602 --> 00:01:10,003
Just what kind of
do-re-mi are we talking?
21
00:01:11,340 --> 00:01:14,040
They threw out some pretty
big numbers per hour, so...
22
00:01:14,109 --> 00:01:18,211
Well, you know what I always say, got to...
got to think of the children.
23
00:01:18,347 --> 00:01:19,546
Ugh.
24
00:01:21,316 --> 00:01:25,418
You know, I have been thinking about
turning this into an actual business.
25
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:26,720
Yeah, is that
...is that crazy?
26
00:01:26,755 --> 00:01:29,723
No, I think what's crazy is you've
been doing this tutoring for nothing,
27
00:01:29,791 --> 00:01:33,260
and the fact that you thought
"La La Land" was the best movie.
28
00:01:33,328 --> 00:01:35,729
Yeah, but if I'm taking
on that many more students,
29
00:01:35,797 --> 00:01:37,831
I probably can't keep
using Outdoor Man, right?
30
00:01:37,900 --> 00:01:39,466
Uh, doggone it.
31
00:01:39,534 --> 00:01:41,468
Then those kids would have
to go someplace else. Yeah.
32
00:01:41,536 --> 00:01:42,535
Damn it, right?
33
00:01:44,373 --> 00:01:45,454
Well, it's okay. It's okay.
34
00:01:45,507 --> 00:01:46,706
I already have someplace else in mind.
35
00:01:46,808 --> 00:01:48,074
Great. That's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
36
00:01:48,176 --> 00:01:49,209
It's quiet. Uh-huh.
37
00:01:49,311 --> 00:01:50,777
There's a lot more space... Perfect.
38
00:01:50,846 --> 00:01:52,913
...and I won't have to pay rent.
39
00:01:55,017 --> 00:01:56,116
(Chuckles)
40
00:01:56,218 --> 00:01:59,319
Oh. Oh, God.
41
00:01:59,421 --> 00:02:00,553
Talking about doing it here?
42
00:02:00,656 --> 00:02:01,755
(Laughing) Yeah.
43
00:02:01,857 --> 00:02:03,323
Damn it, right?
44
00:02:08,931 --> 00:02:11,965
Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen.
www.addic7ed.com
45
00:02:15,771 --> 00:02:18,738
Sign that, and we're all
set. Thank you, Mikey.
46
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:21,875
So, Vanessa's starting
her own business, huh?
47
00:02:21,977 --> 00:02:26,346
Mm-hmm. Well, tell her to be very
careful choosing a partner, right?
48
00:02:26,448 --> 00:02:28,915
Very careful.
49
00:02:29,017 --> 00:02:32,686
That train runs both ways, Ed.
50
00:02:32,788 --> 00:02:34,421
You don't seem very happy about this.
51
00:02:34,523 --> 00:02:35,622
Come on now.
52
00:02:35,724 --> 00:02:38,358
The tomato's finally
bringing in some lettuce.
53
00:02:38,460 --> 00:02:40,827
Oh. Oh, it's the 1940s again?
54
00:02:40,929 --> 00:02:43,630
Me without a fedora and a Lucky Strike.
55
00:02:43,732 --> 00:02:44,698
(Exhales sharply)
56
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,633
You're so right, Ed. (Chuckles)
57
00:02:46,735 --> 00:02:48,101
Yeah, I'm happy she started a business.
58
00:02:48,203 --> 00:02:51,538
I just don't know that I want
those kids running around my house.
59
00:02:51,640 --> 00:02:54,774
Well, I'm gonna miss those little
rascals running around the store.
60
00:02:54,876 --> 00:02:56,142
What are you talking about?
61
00:02:56,244 --> 00:02:57,944
You accuse them of shoplifting.
You yell at them all the time.
62
00:02:58,013 --> 00:03:00,981
You threw that one kid into the trout pond.
63
00:03:01,083 --> 00:03:03,149
Hey. Hi. Hi. How are you?
64
00:03:03,251 --> 00:03:04,317
Hey, look at you. (Laughs)
65
00:03:04,419 --> 00:03:05,518
I got the news, okay.
66
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:06,786
Mwah. Thank you. Have fun, Vanessa,
67
00:03:06,888 --> 00:03:08,488
with all those kids
running around the house.
68
00:03:08,590 --> 00:03:12,292
You may lose a few knickknacks,
but it'll be worth it.
69
00:03:12,394 --> 00:03:14,561
Uh, hey, so, uh... so
did you get a chance
70
00:03:14,663 --> 00:03:16,183
to look at my business plan? Oh, yeah.
71
00:03:16,264 --> 00:03:17,797
Took a gander at it,
but it's been a busy day.
72
00:03:17,899 --> 00:03:20,834
A kid fell into the trout pond.
73
00:03:20,936 --> 00:03:22,569
Well, I mean, if... if
it's not worth your time,
74
00:03:22,671 --> 00:03:25,038
then just give it back to me. No,
no. Of course it's worth my time.
75
00:03:25,140 --> 00:03:27,807
Listen, I made some
suggestions in the margin.
76
00:03:27,909 --> 00:03:31,411
When I ran out of
margin, I-I used the back.
77
00:03:31,513 --> 00:03:32,979
Let me see. Let me see.
78
00:03:33,081 --> 00:03:34,521
I just want...
Before you look at it,
79
00:03:34,549 --> 00:03:36,349
I want you to make sure this
all came out of love and respect,
80
00:03:36,451 --> 00:03:38,885
and you look terrific in
that outfit, by the way.
81
00:03:42,190 --> 00:03:43,390
Oh, my God.
82
00:03:43,492 --> 00:03:45,592
Honey, your original idea was great.
83
00:03:45,694 --> 00:03:47,761
I just fleshed it out a little bit.
84
00:03:47,863 --> 00:03:49,662
Right?
85
00:03:49,765 --> 00:03:53,733
Okay, maybe I should have used blue
ink 'cause red ink looks so angry.
86
00:03:53,802 --> 00:03:59,873
You paid attention to every
single line I wrote. Right.
87
00:03:59,975 --> 00:04:01,374
You really do care.
88
00:04:02,711 --> 00:04:03,877
Yes.
89
00:04:03,979 --> 00:04:08,715
Well, if criticism means
caring, I'm like the care bear.
90
00:04:11,053 --> 00:04:12,786
Wow. Wow.
91
00:04:12,888 --> 00:04:16,256
You even gave me the names
and contacts of Realtors.
92
00:04:16,358 --> 00:04:19,125
Honey, you are so thoughtful.
93
00:04:19,227 --> 00:04:20,527
I mean...
94
00:04:20,629 --> 00:04:22,862
Oh, thank you.
95
00:04:22,931 --> 00:04:26,633
Just thinking about you and I and
the house we live in by ourselves.
96
00:04:28,070 --> 00:04:30,804
97
00:04:30,906 --> 00:04:32,405
(Gasps) Hey, Eve.
98
00:04:32,507 --> 00:04:35,041
Check out this new top I made.
99
00:04:35,110 --> 00:04:37,710
See, I know it looks,
like, really cute on me,
100
00:04:37,779 --> 00:04:43,983
but how do I know if a basic,
plain girl could pull it off?
101
00:04:46,388 --> 00:04:52,559
If only I knew (Chuckles)
of a... of a simple, plain,
102
00:04:52,661 --> 00:04:58,731
like, pretty but average girl
who could just try it on for me
103
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,101
and let me know how it would look.
104
00:05:01,203 --> 00:05:02,202
No!
105
00:05:03,371 --> 00:05:04,604
Hey, guys. Hi.
106
00:05:04,706 --> 00:05:07,107
Mandy, that shirt is awesome. Thanks.
107
00:05:07,175 --> 00:05:09,342
Or maybe it's just 'cause
you're so beautiful.
108
00:05:09,444 --> 00:05:12,212
Aww! Well, we'll never know 'cause,
even though I asked nicely,
109
00:05:12,314 --> 00:05:13,947
Eve won't try it on.
110
00:05:18,286 --> 00:05:19,446
What are you working on, Eve?
111
00:05:19,454 --> 00:05:20,687
My website.
112
00:05:20,755 --> 00:05:22,355
I'm creating an account
so people can buy my songs.
113
00:05:22,457 --> 00:05:24,290
Yeah, 99 cents for a song.
114
00:05:24,359 --> 00:05:27,494
Gee, if you sell a thousand
of them, you'll almost be poor.
115
00:05:29,764 --> 00:05:32,465
W-Why don't you just put them
on one of the streaming services?
116
00:05:32,567 --> 00:05:33,800
Those sites are like pimps...
117
00:05:33,869 --> 00:05:36,402
they take a cut of something
everyone was buying anyway.
118
00:05:36,505 --> 00:05:38,004
So if I put it on my website,
119
00:05:38,106 --> 00:05:41,808
I eliminate the middleman
and keep all the do-re-mi.
120
00:05:41,910 --> 00:05:43,776
You know, Baxters are amazing.
121
00:05:43,879 --> 00:05:48,548
Everyone in this family is a
businessman or a lady who does it.
122
00:05:48,650 --> 00:05:51,184
We set the bar pretty high.
123
00:05:51,253 --> 00:05:52,986
Don't hurt your neck looking up at it.
124
00:05:54,456 --> 00:05:55,555
You know what?
125
00:05:55,657 --> 00:05:57,390
I want to start my own business.
126
00:05:57,492 --> 00:05:59,125
What? Where's this coming from?
127
00:05:59,227 --> 00:06:00,560
Well, with your mom's new tutoring company,
128
00:06:00,662 --> 00:06:02,962
I'm the only one who doesn't
have their own business.
129
00:06:03,064 --> 00:06:04,230
I want to feel like I'm a Baxter.
130
00:06:04,299 --> 00:06:06,966
Be able to talk about
pimps and do-re-mi.
131
00:06:09,204 --> 00:06:11,237
You couldn't pull that off, Bambi.
132
00:06:12,607 --> 00:06:14,774
So, what kind of business
were you thinking about?
133
00:06:14,876 --> 00:06:18,444
Making and selling something.
134
00:06:20,148 --> 00:06:22,649
Babe, that sounds exciting. Yeah.
135
00:06:23,343 --> 00:06:25,423
Yeah, j-just wait until I
come up with the something.
136
00:06:25,453 --> 00:06:26,953
I have lots of ideas. Yeah?
137
00:06:27,055 --> 00:06:29,322
I just forget them.
138
00:06:29,391 --> 00:06:32,292
You'd be surprised how
often I don't have a pen.
139
00:06:32,394 --> 00:06:35,261
Hey, I mean, you never know where the
next great idea's gonna come from.
140
00:06:35,330 --> 00:06:39,265
I mean, someone had to have the
idea for the... the coffee maker.
141
00:06:39,367 --> 00:06:42,235
Oh, that was obviously
Mr. Coffee. (Laughs)
142
00:06:44,339 --> 00:06:47,240
When you're born with that
name, what else are you gonna do?
143
00:06:48,610 --> 00:06:52,946
Yeah, well, you guys are
looking at the next Mister...
144
00:06:54,816 --> 00:06:58,451
Ah, it's okay. I don't...
I don't have a pen anyways.
145
00:06:58,553 --> 00:07:00,486
Okay, you know what?
I-I'll tell you what...
146
00:07:00,589 --> 00:07:04,591
you think of something, I'll help
you sell it, you know, for a taste.
147
00:07:04,693 --> 00:07:06,292
Oh, really? All right, uh, yeah.
148
00:07:06,394 --> 00:07:07,293
Thanks, Eve.
149
00:07:07,395 --> 00:07:09,562
(Laughs) Go get 'em, Kyle!
150
00:07:13,101 --> 00:07:15,101
(Sighs) I own him now.
151
00:07:17,572 --> 00:07:21,441
If any other investor tries
to move in, I'll cut their ass.
152
00:07:21,543 --> 00:07:25,211
What kind of a folk singer are you?
153
00:07:25,313 --> 00:07:28,781
154
00:07:28,883 --> 00:07:30,049
Mmm. Hey.
155
00:07:30,151 --> 00:07:32,051
Whoa.
156
00:07:32,153 --> 00:07:33,953
Ribs?
157
00:07:34,022 --> 00:07:35,955
What did you do wrong?
158
00:07:37,292 --> 00:07:40,727
Or what did I do right?
159
00:07:40,829 --> 00:07:44,564
Well, you took the time to look at my
business plan, and I appreciate it.
160
00:07:44,666 --> 00:07:47,433
You know, this just
encourages me to criticize you.
161
00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:50,069
Now I'm almost sorry I made you this pie.
162
00:07:50,171 --> 00:07:51,571
Wow.
163
00:07:51,673 --> 00:07:54,407
This is why nice guys finish last.
164
00:07:54,509 --> 00:07:56,142
They're fat.
165
00:07:56,244 --> 00:07:57,684
You know, I have some exciting news.
166
00:07:57,779 --> 00:07:59,379
I hired my first tutor.
167
00:07:59,481 --> 00:08:02,348
The rocket is ignited, and
it's on its way to the moon.
168
00:08:02,450 --> 00:08:04,017
I hired Ryan.
169
00:08:04,119 --> 00:08:07,687
And it explodes on re-entry.
170
00:08:07,789 --> 00:08:10,223
I know you two have your differences,
171
00:08:10,325 --> 00:08:12,825
but he's got teaching
experience, a flexible schedule,
172
00:08:12,927 --> 00:08:15,395
and a history degree from
the University of Manitoba.
173
00:08:15,497 --> 00:08:19,198
(Canadian accent) Yeah, home
of the Fighting Syrups, eh?
174
00:08:19,301 --> 00:08:22,135
Make fun all you want, but
this is my area of expertise.
175
00:08:22,237 --> 00:08:23,903
He's a good teacher. It's gonna be great.
176
00:08:24,005 --> 00:08:25,138
(Normal voice) Ah, he
might be a good teacher...
177
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:28,908
Yes... but I'll tell you this, once
those ribs are safely in my belly,
178
00:08:29,010 --> 00:08:30,977
I may just change my tune.
179
00:08:34,912 --> 00:08:38,981
Okay, so, I'm Ryan, and I don't want
you to think of me as your teacher.
180
00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:42,485
I'm just a cool, young dude who
happens to know a lot about history.
181
00:08:42,587 --> 00:08:45,988
Oh, yeah, he's that guy.
182
00:08:46,090 --> 00:08:47,857
What are you doing in here, Mike?
183
00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:50,192
Just getting a cold beer.
Anybody else want one?
184
00:08:50,261 --> 00:08:52,094
Let's see how cool your teacher is.
185
00:08:54,332 --> 00:08:56,452
Uh, please don't undermine
me in front of my students.
186
00:08:56,534 --> 00:08:59,001
Oh, I don't want to get in the middle
of that hip vibe you've got going on.
187
00:08:59,103 --> 00:09:01,704
But remember
...seniors rule.
188
00:09:04,642 --> 00:09:06,208
(Sighs) Okay.
189
00:09:06,310 --> 00:09:08,310
Just out of curiosity,
what are you teaching?
190
00:09:08,413 --> 00:09:10,112
Uh, America in the 1980s.
191
00:09:10,181 --> 00:09:11,947
Oh! Reagan era.
192
00:09:12,016 --> 00:09:15,184
One of the best presidents
the U.S. has ever had.
193
00:09:15,286 --> 00:09:16,252
Really?
194
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:17,686
What about his assault on the poor
195
00:09:17,789 --> 00:09:20,956
or his union busting or how
he exploded the national debt?
196
00:09:21,025 --> 00:09:25,628
Assaulting, busting, exploding...
sounds like a doer to me.
197
00:09:25,696 --> 00:09:27,963
(Inhales deeply) Well, by that theory,
198
00:09:28,032 --> 00:09:30,900
the best president would
be the Tasmanian Devil.
199
00:09:30,935 --> 00:09:34,003
Wouldn't be the first
president born outside the U.S.
200
00:09:38,409 --> 00:09:39,809
Yeah, very funny, Mike.
201
00:09:39,911 --> 00:09:41,677
Look, I got a class to teach,
so if you wouldn't mind...
202
00:09:41,746 --> 00:09:43,245
Yeah, you won't even notice that I'm here.
203
00:09:43,314 --> 00:09:46,649
204
00:09:48,186 --> 00:09:50,186
Okay, wow me.
205
00:09:50,288 --> 00:09:51,487
Okay. Here we go.
206
00:09:51,556 --> 00:09:55,191
Invention number one... what's
the worst part of archery?
207
00:09:56,327 --> 00:09:57,993
Nothing explodes.
208
00:09:59,730 --> 00:10:02,364
No, having to fetch your
arrow when you miss the target.
209
00:10:02,433 --> 00:10:08,304
Well, those days are over, my friend,
thanks to... "Boomerang Arrows"!
210
00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:14,210
See, they do the fetching for you.
211
00:10:14,312 --> 00:10:17,413
Huh. So, instead of chasing after it,
212
00:10:17,515 --> 00:10:20,449
you just pull it out of
your thigh and use it again.
213
00:10:20,551 --> 00:10:24,086
All right, uh, I hadn't
thought of that problem.
214
00:10:24,155 --> 00:10:26,655
Luckily, I have two more ideas.
215
00:10:26,724 --> 00:10:29,191
Okay, um, how many times
have you gone to sit down,
216
00:10:29,293 --> 00:10:30,726
but all the chairs are taken?
217
00:10:30,795 --> 00:10:36,532
Well, those days are over
thanks to "Hang On To Your Seat."
218
00:10:38,669 --> 00:10:43,506
As soon as you begin to sit, a chair
automatically appears under you.
219
00:10:45,776 --> 00:10:49,445
Stand, and the chair disappears.
220
00:10:49,514 --> 00:10:52,548
Yeah, plus, you'll never lose
a game of Musical Chairs again.
221
00:10:52,617 --> 00:10:54,216
Is it easy to put on?
222
00:10:54,285 --> 00:10:57,586
No, from what I can tell,
it's a three-man job.
223
00:10:57,688 --> 00:10:59,688
Two too many. Next.
224
00:10:59,757 --> 00:11:02,324
Okay, well, this next one
I don't have a drawing for
225
00:11:02,426 --> 00:11:05,694
because I thought for sure you were
gonna go for the "Boomerang Arrows."
226
00:11:05,763 --> 00:11:08,164
Well, we might circle back to that.
227
00:11:08,232 --> 00:11:11,167
All right, um, are you tired
of waking up an hour early
228
00:11:11,269 --> 00:11:12,601
to put on your makeup?
229
00:11:12,670 --> 00:11:17,773
Well, those days are over
thanks to "Wake Up to Makeup."
230
00:11:18,447 --> 00:11:19,647
Well, this could be something.
231
00:11:19,677 --> 00:11:20,609
It is.
232
00:11:20,711 --> 00:11:21,911
One of our friendly makeup artists
233
00:11:21,946 --> 00:11:26,182
comes to your house and puts on your
makeup for you while you sleep.
234
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:27,816
Oh, my God.
235
00:11:27,919 --> 00:11:28,918
Yeah, great, right?
236
00:11:28,986 --> 00:11:32,855
I mean, you get an extra hour of
shut-eye, and you wake up ready to go.
237
00:11:32,957 --> 00:11:34,690
(Chuckles) What girl
wouldn't love waking up
238
00:11:34,792 --> 00:11:38,127
to a total stranger touching her face?
239
00:11:38,229 --> 00:11:40,095
Yeah, uh, so you like this one?
240
00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:41,597
No. This is horrifying.
241
00:11:41,666 --> 00:11:43,032
What the hell is wrong with you?
242
00:11:43,134 --> 00:11:45,267
Okay, all right,
w-w-w... I-I have others.
243
00:11:45,369 --> 00:11:48,804
Um, "Sants," socks built
right into your pants.
244
00:11:48,873 --> 00:11:49,805
No, no.
245
00:11:49,907 --> 00:11:51,440
Uh, how about a rug that flies?
246
00:11:51,509 --> 00:11:52,608
Okay, we're done here.
247
00:11:52,710 --> 00:11:53,909
All right, just give me more time.
248
00:11:53,978 --> 00:11:55,244
I'll come up with something.
249
00:11:55,346 --> 00:11:57,947
Kyle, Kyle, sweet Kyle,
don't hurt yourself, okay?
250
00:11:58,049 --> 00:12:00,883
Not everyone is cut
out to be like a Baxter.
251
00:12:00,952 --> 00:12:03,652
You married into it. Be okay with that.
252
00:12:05,556 --> 00:12:08,390
253
00:12:08,459 --> 00:12:11,193
That's how Reagan ended the Cold War.
254
00:12:11,295 --> 00:12:13,562
I'm sorry your side lost.
255
00:12:13,631 --> 00:12:16,198
I'm not a Communist. I'm progressive.
256
00:12:16,267 --> 00:12:19,735
(Sighs) You say potato, I say Spud-nik.
257
00:12:23,007 --> 00:12:24,807
Yes, Reagan was partially responsible...
258
00:12:24,875 --> 00:12:25,941
Right, right, right.
...for ending the Cold War.
259
00:12:26,043 --> 00:12:28,677
He was also responsible for putting
millions of people out on the street.
260
00:12:28,746 --> 00:12:29,912
What are you talking about?
261
00:12:30,014 --> 00:12:32,281
It was the most prosperous
time in American history.
262
00:12:32,383 --> 00:12:34,650
Everybody I know owned a boat.
263
00:12:35,486 --> 00:12:37,287
Yeah, it was good if
you ran a big corporation
264
00:12:37,355 --> 00:12:38,821
'cause Reagan slashed their taxes.
265
00:12:38,923 --> 00:12:40,422
Slashed taxes so you
could hire more workers.
266
00:12:40,524 --> 00:12:41,991
More workers, more jobs.
267
00:12:42,093 --> 00:12:43,525
Oh, except they didn't.
268
00:12:43,628 --> 00:12:45,427
They just kept it for themselves
and bought more boats. Oh. Boats?!
269
00:12:45,529 --> 00:12:48,330
But they were American-made
boats, probably.
270
00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:51,934
Yeah, and then thanks to Reagan's
deregulations, they all sank.
271
00:12:52,036 --> 00:12:53,535
Okay, you got to stop
teaching this lefty stuff.
272
00:12:53,604 --> 00:12:55,437
You know why? They're gonna...
They're gonna fail these tests
273
00:12:55,539 --> 00:12:56,839
because my side's still
writing the textbooks.
274
00:12:56,941 --> 00:12:57,981
Vanessa: Mike, Mike, Mike.
275
00:12:58,009 --> 00:13:00,142
What... What are
you doing in here?
276
00:13:00,244 --> 00:13:01,143
This is a classroom.
277
00:13:01,245 --> 00:13:03,512
It's not a
...Kitchen?
278
00:13:03,614 --> 00:13:05,014
I was trying to teach. No, you weren't.
279
00:13:05,116 --> 00:13:06,782
He was trying to throw
his... his lefty-sidedness.
280
00:13:06,851 --> 00:13:08,517
I was just tr... All right, you
know... Hey, guys, you know what?
281
00:13:08,586 --> 00:13:11,053
If you want to leave a
little bit early, it's okay.
282
00:13:12,657 --> 00:13:14,423
Great work today, guys.
283
00:13:14,525 --> 00:13:15,924
Look, I hired Ryan, not you.
284
00:13:15,993 --> 00:13:18,060
You can't just walk in here and interfere.
285
00:13:18,162 --> 00:13:20,596
Well, you loved me when I was
shredding your business plan.
286
00:13:20,698 --> 00:13:23,165
Well... No. He was
shredding your business plan?
287
00:13:23,267 --> 00:13:27,703
Listen, all the students are gone...
why is the tutor still here?
288
00:13:28,739 --> 00:13:31,707
I'm going. Don't worry.
289
00:13:31,809 --> 00:13:34,576
You are a saint. Oh, stop.
290
00:13:36,647 --> 00:13:39,648
Mike, look, I appreciate your
help with the business plan,
291
00:13:39,750 --> 00:13:40,983
but I can handle it from here.
292
00:13:41,085 --> 00:13:42,284
Really?
293
00:13:42,386 --> 00:13:44,620
He was trying to give those kids beer.
294
00:13:46,882 --> 00:13:48,362
You know, while I would normally love
295
00:13:48,392 --> 00:13:50,025
to get in the middle of an
argument between you two,
296
00:13:50,127 --> 00:13:51,560
I just... I don't have
the time for it right now.
297
00:13:51,662 --> 00:13:52,795
Exactly. You don't have the time.
298
00:13:52,897 --> 00:13:53,829
I can be a big help to you.
299
00:13:53,931 --> 00:13:55,264
No, no, look, I want to do it.
300
00:13:55,366 --> 00:13:57,366
I'm already working on
getting a business license
301
00:13:57,468 --> 00:13:59,501
and a permanent space
and hiring three tutors.
302
00:13:59,603 --> 00:14:03,005
Better hire four, because Deng
Xiaoping here ain't working out.
303
00:14:03,107 --> 00:14:07,343
I don't need to deal with you
chasing off one of my employees.
304
00:14:07,445 --> 00:14:10,412
Ple... Look, please
stay out of my business.
305
00:14:10,514 --> 00:14:14,049
Oh. You know, the librarian was cool,
306
00:14:14,151 --> 00:14:18,587
but this angry businesswoman
character's not my thing.
307
00:14:24,858 --> 00:14:29,528
Hey, Mike Baxter here for Outdoor Man
with a few words about business.
308
00:14:29,596 --> 00:14:32,030
Now, the worst thing that can
happen to business is failure.
309
00:14:32,099 --> 00:14:35,901
Running a close
second... success.
310
00:14:35,969 --> 00:14:37,269
Failure punches you right in the face,
311
00:14:37,371 --> 00:14:39,905
but success... the demons
come from all sides.
312
00:14:39,973 --> 00:14:41,973
You just succeed, and
a little flea bites...
313
00:14:42,009 --> 00:14:44,376
"Wait, what, what am I...
Why do I owe you something?
314
00:14:44,478 --> 00:14:46,211
Forget it. Stop it."
315
00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:48,713
John D. Rockefeller
said it's wrong to assume
316
00:14:48,816 --> 00:14:51,216
that men of immense
wealth are always happy.
317
00:14:51,285 --> 00:14:56,588
Or as Biggie put it better,
"Mo' money, mo' problems."
318
00:14:56,657 --> 00:15:00,459
Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank
is a very rich and successful dude,
319
00:15:00,494 --> 00:15:02,594
but when his team just needed a field goal
320
00:15:02,696 --> 00:15:05,297
to clinch the Super Bowl
and started going backwards,
321
00:15:05,365 --> 00:15:09,468
well, I think we all saw the most
miserable successful man in America.
322
00:15:09,570 --> 00:15:13,839
Run the damn ball!
323
00:15:13,941 --> 00:15:15,140
I digress.
324
00:15:15,209 --> 00:15:17,676
The Buddha said, "Success
is not the key to happiness,
325
00:15:17,744 --> 00:15:21,513
happiness is the key to success."
326
00:15:21,615 --> 00:15:22,781
Ding!
327
00:15:22,883 --> 00:15:27,552
The Buddha also said,
"Run the damn ball!"
328
00:15:29,723 --> 00:15:33,091
Literally everyone knew
that was the only move.
329
00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:35,827
So, whether you preside over
an oil company, football team,
330
00:15:35,929 --> 00:15:39,698
or a chain of outdoor stores,
a whole lot can go wrong.
331
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,934
But it's worth it because if you
thread that needle and pull it off,
332
00:15:43,003 --> 00:15:45,804
there's no more satisfying
feeling than turning a profit
333
00:15:45,906 --> 00:15:49,941
and sending all those
profits to Washington.
334
00:15:50,043 --> 00:15:53,478
Seriously, why do we do this?
335
00:15:53,580 --> 00:15:56,348
336
00:16:01,788 --> 00:16:03,288
Kyle, what you doing out here?
337
00:16:03,390 --> 00:16:04,723
Nothing.
338
00:16:04,825 --> 00:16:08,260
Can't a guy sit in his parked van
at night without it being weird?
339
00:16:08,362 --> 00:16:10,762
Kyle, you really spruced this place up.
340
00:16:10,864 --> 00:16:12,564
Thanks.
341
00:16:12,633 --> 00:16:13,832
I wanted somewhere to go, you know,
342
00:16:13,901 --> 00:16:17,002
when our marriage breaks
up and you kick me out.
343
00:16:17,104 --> 00:16:20,238
Why would I kick you out?
344
00:16:20,340 --> 00:16:21,406
Oh, my God.
345
00:16:21,508 --> 00:16:23,375
You're not going bald, are you?
346
00:16:24,845 --> 00:16:25,810
No.
347
00:16:25,879 --> 00:16:29,047
But Eve's right...
I'm not a Baxter.
348
00:16:29,116 --> 00:16:30,849
You know, you're all
high-powered entrepreneurs,
349
00:16:30,918 --> 00:16:33,285
and I'm just glad when I can say it right.
350
00:16:33,387 --> 00:16:35,554
There's so many R's.
351
00:16:35,656 --> 00:16:38,156
We're not all that high-powered.
352
00:16:38,258 --> 00:16:42,394
I mean, my dad and I are, but
Eve just plays guitar for bums
353
00:16:42,462 --> 00:16:44,896
and my mom's like a
babysitter or something.
354
00:16:44,998 --> 00:16:46,559
Your mom just started her own business,
355
00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:48,066
and I'm the only one who doesn't have one,
356
00:16:48,135 --> 00:16:51,703
and someday you're gonna realize I
don't fit in, and then it'll be over.
357
00:16:51,805 --> 00:16:55,040
Kyle, I'm always going to be here for you.
358
00:16:55,142 --> 00:16:56,942
I heard that from my foster family,
359
00:16:57,044 --> 00:17:01,246
and then I accidentally set their porch
on fire and I'm out on the street.
360
00:17:01,348 --> 00:17:04,182
I know you've grown up only
having to rely on yourself,
361
00:17:04,284 --> 00:17:06,685
but those days are over.
362
00:17:06,753 --> 00:17:09,287
I can't even count on me now?
363
00:17:09,389 --> 00:17:11,022
You can count on us.
364
00:17:11,124 --> 00:17:12,457
I'm never gonna let you go.
365
00:17:12,559 --> 00:17:16,061
And if someone tries to kick you
out, they kick me out with you.
366
00:17:16,163 --> 00:17:18,463
So, you'll live in the van with me?
367
00:17:18,565 --> 00:17:22,500
No, we're never living
in anything with wheels.
368
00:17:23,570 --> 00:17:26,805
It doesn't bother you that I'm not
like the rest of your family?
369
00:17:26,873 --> 00:17:29,341
I didn't want to marry a Baxter.
370
00:17:29,409 --> 00:17:31,810
Also, I think there are laws against that.
371
00:17:31,912 --> 00:17:34,546
372
00:17:34,681 --> 00:17:36,881
Hey.
373
00:17:36,984 --> 00:17:38,416
(Door closes) Have you
been working this whole time?
374
00:17:38,518 --> 00:17:41,553
Yeah, well, they call it
Quicken, but it takes forever.
375
00:17:41,655 --> 00:17:42,988
Ha.
376
00:17:43,056 --> 00:17:45,724
You missed a great episode
of "Deadliest Catch."
377
00:17:45,792 --> 00:17:51,963
One of the fishermen lost the back
of his head... finished his shift.
378
00:17:52,032 --> 00:17:53,598
Oh, I had fun.
379
00:17:53,667 --> 00:17:56,568
I was linking my new business
account with my payroll software
380
00:17:56,637 --> 00:18:01,239
so I could calculate my tax
liability for this fiscal quarter.
381
00:18:01,308 --> 00:18:03,875
He put a wool cap on and
just pulled his nets in.
382
00:18:03,977 --> 00:18:06,044
Don't take my complaining wrong.
383
00:18:06,146 --> 00:18:08,647
Business is doing really, really well.
384
00:18:08,715 --> 00:18:11,449
Your business, honey,
is none of my business.
385
00:18:11,551 --> 00:18:16,354
Look, I, uh... I know I said that,
386
00:18:16,423 --> 00:18:18,757
but, um, it wa... it was
a little bit extreme.
387
00:18:18,825 --> 00:18:21,459
I mean, we can talk
about this a little, okay?
388
00:18:21,561 --> 00:18:23,295
There's nothing to talk
about, honey. You got this.
389
00:18:23,397 --> 00:18:24,996
What if I don't want it?
390
00:18:25,065 --> 00:18:29,401
I mean, I want it, but... I kind of hate it.
391
00:18:29,469 --> 00:18:32,137
You just realized that other
people's kids are awful?
392
00:18:32,239 --> 00:18:34,105
(Sighs) No, no, no.
393
00:18:34,174 --> 00:18:35,840
I mean, that... that's
what I miss, Mike.
394
00:18:35,942 --> 00:18:38,176
I mean, I-I'm running
this tutoring business,
395
00:18:38,245 --> 00:18:40,745
and I don't get to do any actual tutoring.
396
00:18:40,814 --> 00:18:41,946
Well, I have a lot of opinions,
397
00:18:42,049 --> 00:18:44,949
but I was asked to stay
out of it, so... good night.
398
00:18:45,052 --> 00:18:47,152
Come on. I'm too tired to beg.
399
00:18:47,254 --> 00:18:49,521
Just... Just start
talking, please.
400
00:18:49,623 --> 00:18:54,092
Listen, when I first started
Outdoor Man, I was working so hard
401
00:18:54,161 --> 00:18:55,962
that I never really went
outdoors, right? Hmm.
402
00:18:55,996 --> 00:18:59,264
It was a year before I was able to
shoot something smaller than me.
403
00:18:59,333 --> 00:19:00,498
I remember.
404
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:03,435
That's when we got used to
eating store-bought meat.
405
00:19:03,537 --> 00:19:05,203
So, uh... so
what did you do?
406
00:19:05,272 --> 00:19:07,605
Well, what I figured out
early is you don't hire people
407
00:19:07,674 --> 00:19:08,940
to do the stuff you like to do,
408
00:19:09,042 --> 00:19:11,576
you hire people to do the
stuff you don't like to do.
409
00:19:11,678 --> 00:19:12,977
Well, I would love that.
410
00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:15,113
That would be great, but it's my company,
411
00:19:15,215 --> 00:19:17,682
it's my responsibility,
and I feel like I'm the one
412
00:19:17,784 --> 00:19:19,184
who should be doing all that stuff.
413
00:19:19,286 --> 00:19:20,919
Right, well, I think
you have that half right.
414
00:19:20,987 --> 00:19:25,156
It is your responsibility to get stuff
done, but, honey, if you're not happy,
415
00:19:25,258 --> 00:19:28,960
your business is not going to be a success.
416
00:19:29,062 --> 00:19:31,496
You're right. You're right.
417
00:19:31,598 --> 00:19:32,530
You know what?
418
00:19:32,632 --> 00:19:35,300
Screw you, Quicken. (Chuckles)
419
00:19:35,402 --> 00:19:37,836
You ha... Hire an administrator
to do the paperwork,
420
00:19:37,938 --> 00:19:40,372
then you go out and shoot
stuff smaller than you.
421
00:19:40,474 --> 00:19:41,940
You deserve it.
422
00:19:42,042 --> 00:19:43,675
(Chuckles) All right,
thanks. Thanks, sweetie.
423
00:19:43,777 --> 00:19:44,809
You bet.
424
00:19:46,613 --> 00:19:49,114
Oh, hey, you know who would
be a great administrator?
425
00:19:49,216 --> 00:19:50,248
Ryan.
426
00:19:52,319 --> 00:19:55,120
A lefty in a bloated bureaucracy.
427
00:19:56,690 --> 00:19:57,689
Perfect.
428
00:20:04,790 --> 00:20:05,822
Hey, Eve!
429
00:20:08,460 --> 00:20:09,492
Hey.
430
00:20:09,561 --> 00:20:11,795
Thanks. We'd love to join.
431
00:20:11,897 --> 00:20:14,064
Kyle, come get a seat.
432
00:20:14,166 --> 00:20:15,365
Oh, I don't need to.
433
00:20:15,467 --> 00:20:16,900
I'm already wearing one.
434
00:20:18,904 --> 00:20:21,037
Well, this could be promising.
435
00:20:21,139 --> 00:20:23,907
You bet your sweet Sants it is.
436
00:20:32,818 --> 00:20:35,418
Uh, ta-freaking-da.
437
00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:36,853
Yay!
438
00:20:36,955 --> 00:20:38,822
Baby, QVC, here we come!
439
00:20:38,924 --> 00:20:40,857
We're gonna be chair rich.
440
00:20:42,694 --> 00:20:45,161
So, Eve, what do you think?
Are you, uh, wowed? Yeah.
441
00:20:45,263 --> 00:20:48,098
Well, I got to hand it to you, it
does look pretty uncomfortable,
442
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:49,866
but it appears to work.
443
00:20:49,968 --> 00:20:51,434
Well, no, it's actually super comfortable.
444
00:20:51,536 --> 00:20:52,736
Yeah. 'Cause the belt is so tight
445
00:20:52,838 --> 00:20:56,673
that you're completely
numb from the waist down.
446
00:20:56,775 --> 00:21:00,810
It's invented by the guy
completely numb from the neck up.
447
00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:05,410
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