Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,164 --> 00:00:03,228
This is the slowest dinner
rush we've ever had.
2
00:00:03,412 --> 00:00:05,036
Ooh, the city must have taken down
3
00:00:05,138 --> 00:00:08,331
your "Last Sandwich
for 40 Miles" sign.
4
00:00:08,365 --> 00:00:11,366
Oh! This sandwich is amazing.
5
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:13,900
It's a pesto mayonnaise
with a smoked turkey
6
00:00:13,934 --> 00:00:15,867
and a fancy cheese
I've never heard of.
7
00:00:15,901 --> 00:00:19,067
I know it's fancy,
because it's not spray on.
8
00:00:19,101 --> 00:00:21,202
Where did you get that?
9
00:00:21,236 --> 00:00:23,869
At the new place down the street,
The Late Nite Bite.
10
00:00:23,904 --> 00:00:26,035
It's super close.
We can go there all the time.
11
00:00:26,070 --> 00:00:28,804
The only problem is
it's super packed.
12
00:00:29,739 --> 00:00:31,606
Not like this place. [scoffs]
13
00:00:33,208 --> 00:00:37,310
There's another sandwich shop
on Waverly Place? Competition?
14
00:00:37,345 --> 00:00:40,712
There's no competition.
Let me try that.
15
00:00:44,215 --> 00:00:47,950
Mmm. Mmm. There's no competition.
16
00:00:53,623 --> 00:00:55,190
Mmmm.
17
00:00:55,223 --> 00:00:58,191
This sandwich is even
better than pizza.
18
00:00:58,225 --> 00:01:01,126
Can I have it back, please?
19
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:03,328
Jerry, maybe we should
send somebody down there
20
00:01:03,362 --> 00:01:04,496
to check it out, huh?
21
00:01:06,465 --> 00:01:07,698
I'll go.
22
00:01:07,832 --> 00:01:12,035
No, no, no. I'll go.
I need a new sandwich, anyway.
23
00:01:12,070 --> 00:01:14,670
We only send you on
missions of destruction.
24
00:01:14,704 --> 00:01:17,404
Max we send to confuse people.
25
00:01:17,438 --> 00:01:21,607
For research and surveillance,
Justin's our guy.
26
00:01:22,543 --> 00:01:24,576
OK. I've got just the decoy.
27
00:01:24,611 --> 00:01:27,012
I'll speak with an
Australian accent.
28
00:01:27,046 --> 00:01:28,878
"G'day, mate. I'd like to try
29
00:01:28,913 --> 00:01:32,581
one of your shrimp on the
barbie sandy-wiches... mate."
30
00:01:32,616 --> 00:01:33,715
Hmm?
31
00:01:35,951 --> 00:01:38,252
No, that's not an
Australian accent.
32
00:01:38,286 --> 00:01:42,422
I'm a master of voices. Listen.
33
00:01:46,526 --> 00:01:49,762
"I'd like to try your shrimp
on the barbie sandy-wich...
34
00:01:50,697 --> 00:01:52,198
...mate."
35
00:01:54,968 --> 00:01:59,070
That's not an accent. That's
your lame Jim Carrey impression.
36
00:01:59,104 --> 00:02:01,438
Yeah, but you knew who it was.
37
00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:05,108
It's gonna be in my one-man
show when school starts.
38
00:02:05,142 --> 00:02:08,611
I'm gonna work on my
impressions all summer.
39
00:02:08,646 --> 00:02:11,046
All summer long, huh?
40
00:02:12,415 --> 00:02:17,218
All work and no play
makes Jack a dull boy.
41
00:02:21,556 --> 00:02:23,890
Jack Nicholson.
42
00:02:24,992 --> 00:02:27,793
Oh, I got one. OK. Um...
43
00:02:27,828 --> 00:02:31,864
All summer with no Max
makes Alex a happy girl.
44
00:02:33,233 --> 00:02:34,901
[whispering] Alex Russo.
45
00:02:37,437 --> 00:02:39,504
* Well you know everything's
gonna be a breeze *
46
00:02:39,806 --> 00:02:41,473
* And the end will no doubt
justify the means *
47
00:02:42,008 --> 00:02:43,341
* You can fix any problem with
the slightest of ease *
48
00:02:43,375 --> 00:02:45,175
* Yes please *
49
00:02:45,209 --> 00:02:47,043
* But you might find out it'll
go to your head *
50
00:02:47,711 --> 00:02:48,944
* When you write a report on a
book you never read *
51
00:02:49,578 --> 00:02:51,545
* With the snap of your fingers
you can make your bed *
52
00:02:51,579 --> 00:02:53,079
* That's what I said *
53
00:02:53,180 --> 00:02:56,281
* Everything is not
what it seems *
54
00:02:56,316 --> 00:03:00,118
* When you can get all you wanted
in your wildest dreams *
55
00:03:00,152 --> 00:03:03,922
* You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes *
56
00:03:03,956 --> 00:03:07,791
* Because everything is
not what it seems *
57
00:03:07,826 --> 00:03:11,494
* Everything is not
what it seems *
58
00:03:11,528 --> 00:03:15,597
* When you can have what you want
by the simplest of means *
59
00:03:15,631 --> 00:03:19,299
* Be careful not to mess with
the balance of things *
60
00:03:19,334 --> 00:03:23,469
* Because everything is not... *
61
00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:26,172
* What it seems *
62
00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:34,173
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
63
00:03:37,079 --> 00:03:40,982
As expected,
the place is very busy.
64
00:03:42,484 --> 00:03:43,751
Aha!
65
00:03:43,785 --> 00:03:47,220
They're open 24 hours.
66
00:03:47,254 --> 00:03:50,322
I don't know why I said "Aha."
67
00:03:53,125 --> 00:03:55,626
Oh! There's one of their menus.
68
00:03:58,965 --> 00:04:01,834
You know there are take-out menus.
69
00:04:03,771 --> 00:04:05,439
If you want a copy,
the trash can out front
70
00:04:05,473 --> 00:04:07,040
probably has 20 of them.
71
00:04:08,576 --> 00:04:11,077
[bad accent] I take
photographs of menus.
72
00:04:12,746 --> 00:04:18,218
I'm an artist.
An Australian menu artist.
73
00:04:19,587 --> 00:04:22,021
Love your variety of sandy-wiches.
74
00:04:23,824 --> 00:04:26,359
I'm so on board with your
whole Australian thing
75
00:04:26,393 --> 00:04:28,594
until you said, "sandy-wiches."
76
00:04:28,629 --> 00:04:31,897
[fake laugh] They don't say that?
77
00:04:33,233 --> 00:04:35,601
I'm... I'm sorry.
78
00:04:35,635 --> 00:04:38,870
Don't be sorry.
I like fake accents.
79
00:04:38,905 --> 00:04:41,206
I also like fake mustaches.
80
00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:45,143
Oh, my gosh. I have one.
I knew I should have worn it.
81
00:04:46,245 --> 00:04:48,513
It's OK. I was kind of kidding.
82
00:04:48,547 --> 00:04:52,917
[chuckles] Oh. Um... I'm Justin.
83
00:04:52,952 --> 00:04:55,454
I'm Juliet.
84
00:04:55,488 --> 00:04:57,623
Sorry.
85
00:04:57,657 --> 00:04:59,791
Want to hear about our special?
86
00:04:59,825 --> 00:05:02,693
I think I'm looking at it.
87
00:05:04,226 --> 00:05:06,260
Oh, was that smooth?
88
00:05:07,329 --> 00:05:09,597
You kinda ruined it
by talking about it.
89
00:05:10,899 --> 00:05:12,699
You're still cute, though.
90
00:05:14,102 --> 00:05:17,505
Juliet, you didn't tell me
we had a special visitor.
91
00:05:17,539 --> 00:05:22,109
Pardon me. Aren't you the young man
who works at Waverly Sub Station?
92
00:05:22,144 --> 00:05:25,579
Oh, I got a sandwich
there last week.
93
00:05:25,613 --> 00:05:28,949
Yeah, I was on a rather bland diet
94
00:05:28,983 --> 00:05:30,917
and you guys really
got me through it.
95
00:05:30,952 --> 00:05:33,720
- Thank you.
- I'm Justin Russo.
96
00:05:33,754 --> 00:05:36,923
- Oh.
- And...
97
00:05:37,992 --> 00:05:39,526
Lovely dress.
98
00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:42,428
I've always thought people
should get dressed up
99
00:05:42,462 --> 00:05:43,796
to make sandwiches.
100
00:05:43,831 --> 00:05:47,133
Out of respect for
the profession...
101
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:50,936
...of sandwich making.
102
00:05:50,970 --> 00:05:54,840
Ooh. Insincere compliments.
103
00:05:54,874 --> 00:05:59,144
[chuckling] Well,
I see the game is afoot.
104
00:05:59,178 --> 00:06:02,213
"Insincere," huh?
I knew you didn't like this dress.
105
00:06:02,248 --> 00:06:04,382
- [stammers]
- Mm-hm?
106
00:06:04,416 --> 00:06:08,018
Juliet, this boy is here to
spy on our establishment.
107
00:06:08,052 --> 00:06:11,588
He's not spying, Daddy.
He's very nice.
108
00:06:11,623 --> 00:06:14,590
He was just videotaping
our menu for his...
109
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:17,793
You know, things are not
looking good for you.
110
00:06:17,827 --> 00:06:20,262
I'm afraid, Justin Russo,
111
00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:22,397
that I'm going to have
to ask you to leave.
112
00:06:22,432 --> 00:06:25,466
If don't, the consequences
will be most horrible
113
00:06:25,501 --> 00:06:27,435
and permanent!
114
00:06:27,469 --> 00:06:30,971
Oh, honey, what did we say
about the hand gestures?
115
00:06:31,005 --> 00:06:32,771
Not in the restaurant.
116
00:06:32,806 --> 00:06:35,106
There you go.
117
00:06:37,577 --> 00:06:39,845
Here, take this.
118
00:06:39,879 --> 00:06:41,947
But this has someone's
phone number on it.
119
00:06:41,981 --> 00:06:45,751
Yeah. It's the cute girl who
works at Late Nite Bite.
120
00:06:45,786 --> 00:06:49,755
Oh. I like her.
121
00:06:53,895 --> 00:06:57,430
The right side of the take-out
menu lists the specials.
122
00:06:57,464 --> 00:07:00,099
Fangs-giving Turkey plate.
123
00:07:00,133 --> 00:07:02,234
The Count of Monte CristoSandwi.
124
00:07:03,069 --> 00:07:07,105
on... "garlic style" bread.
125
00:07:08,474 --> 00:07:11,242
Justin, isn't that all
stuff from the menu?
126
00:07:11,276 --> 00:07:13,144
Why'd you write it
on the white board?
127
00:07:13,345 --> 00:07:16,447
You sent me on a spy mission,
and I'm debriefing you.
128
00:07:16,481 --> 00:07:20,618
Without the board we're just
sitting around looking at menus.
129
00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:25,656
Hold up. "Garlic style?
" "Open all night?"
130
00:07:25,690 --> 00:07:29,660
"Count?" "Fangs?" They're vampires!
131
00:07:32,063 --> 00:07:34,431
The Van Heusens are vampires?
132
00:07:34,465 --> 00:07:37,901
That's why they had fangs.
133
00:07:37,936 --> 00:07:40,237
Thought it was just a theme.
134
00:07:42,039 --> 00:07:45,141
[bad accent] We've got a
vampire war on our hands.
135
00:07:46,510 --> 00:07:48,545
Hasta la vista, baby!
136
00:07:50,781 --> 00:07:52,716
That was the Terminator!
137
00:07:53,952 --> 00:07:56,552
All right, he's gone.
We should pack up and move.
138
00:08:02,259 --> 00:08:04,927
All right. So they're vampires?
139
00:08:04,962 --> 00:08:07,697
It doesn't mean we can't
beat them at their own game.
140
00:08:07,731 --> 00:08:11,600
What do they got?
A castle dungeon theme?
141
00:08:11,634 --> 00:08:14,269
We've got a subway station theme.
142
00:08:14,303 --> 00:08:16,738
All we have to do
is make people feel
143
00:08:16,772 --> 00:08:19,373
like they're really in a New
York City subway station
144
00:08:19,407 --> 00:08:20,674
when they come in here.
145
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:23,042
You know, complete the
experience for them.
146
00:08:23,076 --> 00:08:25,643
I'll just write that down on the
white board and make it official.
147
00:08:26,946 --> 00:08:28,413
I get it.
148
00:08:28,580 --> 00:08:32,283
We can move the turnstiles by
the bathrooms to the front door.
149
00:08:32,317 --> 00:08:34,117
It'll create a line outside,
150
00:08:34,218 --> 00:08:37,387
make the place look busy,
like those discotheques do.
151
00:08:37,421 --> 00:08:39,789
"Discotheques?"
152
00:08:39,824 --> 00:08:44,060
This could be the worst
family meeting ever.
153
00:08:45,496 --> 00:08:47,397
No. No. It's coming together.
154
00:08:47,431 --> 00:08:51,967
Late Nite Bite, you don't
know what bear you just poked.
155
00:08:55,004 --> 00:08:57,605
[roars]
156
00:08:58,941 --> 00:09:02,245
- I'm the bear.
- Oh.
157
00:09:05,017 --> 00:09:07,618
- [sighs]
- Alex, I need to speak to you.
158
00:09:09,488 --> 00:09:11,189
I've got a date with
Juliet Van Heusen
159
00:09:11,457 --> 00:09:13,190
and I need your help
sneaking around Mom and Dad.
160
00:09:13,225 --> 00:09:15,358
Well, you came to the right place.
161
00:09:15,392 --> 00:09:17,226
You don't want to be caught
dating the competition.
162
00:09:17,260 --> 00:09:19,061
- What do I do?
- Use magic.
163
00:09:19,096 --> 00:09:20,763
- That's it?
- Would you have thought of it?
164
00:09:20,797 --> 00:09:22,966
- Nope.
- OK then.
165
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:25,969
If there's nothing else,
I've got to get started on my plan
166
00:09:26,003 --> 00:09:28,271
for getting Max and those
annoying impressions
167
00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:29,972
out of the house for the summer.
168
00:09:30,007 --> 00:09:31,674
"I'll be back."
169
00:09:31,708 --> 00:09:34,609
No, you won't, Max. No, you won't.
170
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:47,519
[Jerry's voice over PA] Waverly Sub Station.
Next stop, delicious.
171
00:09:53,358 --> 00:09:56,660
OK, and here we are.
172
00:09:56,694 --> 00:09:58,928
Can we eat now?
173
00:09:58,963 --> 00:10:02,932
Not yet, sir. First a
little subway entertainment.
174
00:10:02,967 --> 00:10:04,100
Harper, you're on.
175
00:10:04,134 --> 00:10:06,569
And a one, two three...
176
00:10:08,872 --> 00:10:11,006
I love sandwiches.
177
00:10:12,576 --> 00:10:14,310
Why do they call them sandwiches?
178
00:10:14,711 --> 00:10:17,679
They're not made out of sand.
They're not made by witches.
179
00:10:17,713 --> 00:10:19,581
What is the deal?
180
00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:22,984
Jerry Seinfeld.
181
00:10:24,786 --> 00:10:27,288
Please, can I just get some coffee?
182
00:10:27,322 --> 00:10:30,258
Ah... I'll get that for you, sir.
183
00:10:30,292 --> 00:10:33,695
Oh, and you'll get yours,
too, buddy.
184
00:10:36,933 --> 00:10:39,201
So Romeo,
185
00:10:39,235 --> 00:10:41,936
did you figure out how you're
using magic to date Juliet?
186
00:10:41,971 --> 00:10:44,939
Yep. I added five minutes
to the break schedule.
187
00:10:44,974 --> 00:10:47,910
Now when we date,
it'll be for 25 minutes at a time.
188
00:10:51,014 --> 00:10:54,450
You used magic to do this...?
189
00:11:03,192 --> 00:11:07,796
Justin, you could have used
magic to... to stop time,
190
00:11:07,831 --> 00:11:10,465
freeze Mom and Dad so
they can't find you,
191
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:13,669
create an alternate universe
where you and Juliet can date
192
00:11:13,704 --> 00:11:16,706
for a year, but it'd only
be a minute of our time.
193
00:11:16,740 --> 00:11:19,208
Something big and magical.
194
00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:23,279
I also used it to grow two inches.
195
00:11:24,648 --> 00:11:27,750
You are a wiz-idiot.
196
00:11:27,784 --> 00:11:29,252
You know what?
197
00:11:29,286 --> 00:11:31,621
You use magic your way,
I'm gonna use it my way.
198
00:11:31,655 --> 00:11:33,890
[scoffs] Fine, I will.
199
00:11:35,826 --> 00:11:37,393
There.
200
00:11:37,428 --> 00:11:41,064
Now you're two inches shorter,
just like you used to be.
201
00:11:41,098 --> 00:11:43,500
What's up, shorty?
202
00:12:10,460 --> 00:12:12,859
That was the best nightmare ever.
203
00:12:37,916 --> 00:12:39,817
[cell phone ringing]
204
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:43,720
Hi, Justin.
205
00:12:45,022 --> 00:12:48,190
Wait, you only have 25
minutes for the whole date?
206
00:12:48,225 --> 00:12:51,360
No, OK. We can just
skip the awkward part
207
00:12:51,394 --> 00:12:53,061
and you can hold my hand.
208
00:12:54,931 --> 00:12:57,365
Yeah, I guess that
was kind of awkward.
209
00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:00,134
Hey, got it over with.
210
00:13:00,168 --> 00:13:02,502
All right. See you outside.
211
00:13:17,016 --> 00:13:18,649
Ahh!
212
00:13:18,684 --> 00:13:20,684
AB Positive.
213
00:13:37,368 --> 00:13:39,936
Uh, Juliet?
214
00:13:39,970 --> 00:13:43,372
Yeah, hi. Where do you
think you're going?
215
00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:47,409
Um... I... I was just going
216
00:13:47,443 --> 00:13:50,711
[chuckles] to go wreak
havoc on innocent mortals.
217
00:13:50,745 --> 00:13:52,679
Oh!
218
00:13:52,713 --> 00:13:55,681
Oh, well, good, honey.
Fabulous. Have fun.
219
00:13:57,150 --> 00:13:58,617
Juliet?
220
00:14:00,386 --> 00:14:03,154
If you're sneaking out
to see that Russo boy,
221
00:14:03,188 --> 00:14:04,588
you'll be grounded.
222
00:14:04,623 --> 00:14:08,191
And I mean, in the ground,
this time.
223
00:14:09,126 --> 00:14:11,793
Oh, Daddy, go back to dead.
224
00:14:14,931 --> 00:14:16,731
Wait a minute!
225
00:14:17,766 --> 00:14:19,801
I know what you're doing.
226
00:14:19,935 --> 00:14:22,403
You're sneaking out to do something
your mother wouldn't approve of,
227
00:14:22,437 --> 00:14:26,340
like getting a
frozen hot chocolate.
228
00:14:26,374 --> 00:14:27,908
I'm coming with you!
229
00:14:27,942 --> 00:14:30,644
Go ahead, sneak around,
eat whatever you want...
230
00:14:30,678 --> 00:14:32,879
like I don't notice
how we can't fit into
231
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:35,380
a queen-sized coffin anymore?
232
00:14:35,414 --> 00:14:38,547
Fine. I'll switch to blood light.
233
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:45,250
Oh, sweetie, on your way home
234
00:14:45,284 --> 00:14:46,751
could you pick up some detergent?
235
00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:49,086
Your father keeps wiping
his fangs on his cape,
236
00:14:49,121 --> 00:14:51,621
because he's a
little vampire piggy.
237
00:14:51,656 --> 00:14:54,957
- [man] I heard that!
- You were meant to.
238
00:15:04,199 --> 00:15:07,367
Hey, Justin, I don't think
going through the graveyard
239
00:15:07,401 --> 00:15:09,002
is a shortcut to the movies.
240
00:15:09,470 --> 00:15:13,138
But it is, because you tend to
walk faster through a graveyard.
241
00:15:13,172 --> 00:15:14,973
[owl hooting]
242
00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:20,510
I mean, unless you
actually like graveyards.
243
00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:22,012
Do you?
244
00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:25,281
Well, not really as
much as you seem to.
245
00:15:25,315 --> 00:15:29,884
I'm totally... totally cool with
the whole graveyard situation.
246
00:15:31,387 --> 00:15:35,722
You know what? We have,
uh... we have some time to... "kill."
247
00:15:35,756 --> 00:15:38,658
Well, yeah, I guess we could
hang out here for a while.
248
00:15:38,692 --> 00:15:40,660
Aha! You said, "hang."
249
00:15:40,694 --> 00:15:42,961
Most people say, "sit,
" but you said, "hang."
250
00:15:42,996 --> 00:15:44,763
[owl hooting]
251
00:15:44,797 --> 00:15:47,399
Nobody says, "you could
sit out here for a while."
252
00:15:47,433 --> 00:15:50,401
Oh, I get what's happening.
253
00:15:50,436 --> 00:15:52,904
This is the awkward part we talked about,
before we hold hands.
254
00:15:52,938 --> 00:15:54,605
Let's do it. Here...
255
00:15:54,773 --> 00:15:57,442
Oh, should we do the interlocking
fingers or the hand in hand?
256
00:15:57,476 --> 00:16:00,078
Ooh... Which one's less sweaty?
257
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:04,883
- [chuckles] We're...
- [giggles]
258
00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:10,688
So, um... I'm not sure about
this movie we're gonna see.
259
00:16:10,723 --> 00:16:15,594
I don't think there will be enough,
uh... blood in it for me.
260
00:16:15,628 --> 00:16:17,629
It's a romantic comedy.
261
00:16:17,664 --> 00:16:21,867
No, I'm just saying I'm
totally fine with blood.
262
00:16:21,901 --> 00:16:24,303
It's not a thing. Aren't you?
263
00:16:24,337 --> 00:16:28,940
No. Hey, I was wondering if we
could grab a bite after the movie?
264
00:16:28,975 --> 00:16:31,073
- Aha!
- Aha what?
265
00:16:31,107 --> 00:16:34,008
- You said, "bite!"
- Yeah, I also said "kill"
266
00:16:34,042 --> 00:16:37,278
and "hang," which seem
to be important to you.
267
00:16:37,312 --> 00:16:39,647
Pss! Pss! Pss!
268
00:16:39,681 --> 00:16:42,917
- You know, I don't got any...
- And sleep!
269
00:16:42,952 --> 00:16:44,318
Marvin, what are you doing here?
270
00:16:44,553 --> 00:16:47,051
Ooh! I see you brought us a snack!
271
00:16:47,086 --> 00:16:49,151
No, he's not a snack, he's my date.
272
00:16:49,186 --> 00:16:50,619
We're going to the movies.
273
00:16:50,820 --> 00:16:52,753
Ooh! Make sure he
eats a lot of popcorn.
274
00:16:52,788 --> 00:16:55,155
I like my blood buttery.
275
00:16:55,190 --> 00:16:59,993
Marvin, you heard her.
She's on a date. Leave her alone.
276
00:17:00,027 --> 00:17:02,729
Hey, Juliet.
How's your mom and dad?
277
00:17:02,763 --> 00:17:05,065
Is she still trying
to play the piano?
278
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:09,469
I haven't seen them
in centuries. [laughs]
279
00:17:09,504 --> 00:17:11,271
- [snoring]
- Yeah, they're pretty much
280
00:17:11,306 --> 00:17:13,040
the same, you know..
281
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:16,443
Dad tries to be scary
and mom calms him down.
282
00:17:16,477 --> 00:17:18,045
Nothing's really changed.
283
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:19,846
But you guys have to go!
284
00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:24,447
- Awake.
- ...problem with dead things.
285
00:17:25,849 --> 00:17:27,150
Do you?
286
00:17:27,184 --> 00:17:29,587
Yeah, the place gives
me the creeps. Let's go.
287
00:17:29,621 --> 00:17:31,721
Yeah, it's kinda scary.
288
00:17:31,755 --> 00:17:34,057
Bye, Mary! Bye Marvin!
289
00:17:42,867 --> 00:17:46,702
OK, that'll be $6.50 out of...
290
00:17:46,736 --> 00:17:50,806
one million dollars.
291
00:17:52,642 --> 00:17:55,343
Doctor Evil.
292
00:17:56,711 --> 00:17:58,710
Austin Powers.
293
00:18:04,348 --> 00:18:08,184
And that's the definition
of the word, "definition."
294
00:18:08,218 --> 00:18:10,352
[laughing]
295
00:18:10,387 --> 00:18:13,555
What would be the definition
of the word, "word?"
296
00:18:13,589 --> 00:18:17,491
Where have you been all my life?
297
00:18:17,525 --> 00:18:21,826
If I told you, you probably
wouldn't believe me.
298
00:18:23,362 --> 00:18:27,664
Juliet, I, uh...
I know you're a vampire.
299
00:18:27,698 --> 00:18:30,899
OK, so you probably
would believe me.
300
00:18:30,933 --> 00:18:35,335
And while we're on the subject,
I know you're a wizard.
301
00:18:35,370 --> 00:18:37,338
I can tell by your scent.
302
00:18:37,372 --> 00:18:41,511
Sorry... I've been slicing ham.
303
00:18:44,648 --> 00:18:47,750
No. your wizard scent.
Part brick, part pine needle.
304
00:18:47,784 --> 00:18:50,152
Vampires have a
strong sense of smell.
305
00:18:50,186 --> 00:18:52,988
Stronger than werewolves,
but people don't want to get past the fangs
306
00:18:53,022 --> 00:18:55,123
and the blood drinking
to learn the specifics.
307
00:18:56,758 --> 00:19:00,728
You know, you're not how I
expected vampires to be.
308
00:19:00,762 --> 00:19:06,366
Well, that's because my parents wanted
me to fit in better d gave me a soul.
309
00:19:06,401 --> 00:19:08,168
I have feelings.
310
00:19:08,202 --> 00:19:10,103
And what do your feelings tell you?
311
00:19:10,137 --> 00:19:12,438
That we should do this again.
312
00:19:12,472 --> 00:19:14,039
[laughs]
313
00:19:14,073 --> 00:19:17,108
But... [sighs] Your
parents don't like me.
314
00:19:17,143 --> 00:19:20,277
And my parents wouldn't like it if I was
going out with a competitor's daughter.
315
00:19:20,312 --> 00:19:23,682
I'm sorry. I don't care what Mommy
and Dad have to say about this.
316
00:19:23,715 --> 00:19:25,849
I am going to tell them about you.
317
00:19:25,883 --> 00:19:29,488
You know what? I'm going
to tell my parents, too.
318
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:33,190
Then we can have a date that lasts
longer than my 25-minute break from work.
319
00:19:33,224 --> 00:19:35,692
It was fun. I've never
gone to the movies
320
00:19:35,727 --> 00:19:38,628
just to see the coming
attractions before.
321
00:19:38,663 --> 00:19:41,765
Although we could have
gotten a smaller popcorn.
322
00:19:41,799 --> 00:19:44,801
Hey, the fun part was you.
323
00:19:47,405 --> 00:19:50,007
[sighs] I don't wa to say goodbye.
324
00:19:50,041 --> 00:19:52,309
Neither do I.
325
00:19:52,343 --> 00:19:57,414
OK, how about we count to
three and turn and walk away.
326
00:19:57,448 --> 00:20:01,116
[giggles] You said "Count."
327
00:20:06,056 --> 00:20:09,425
- "Count?" [laughs]
- Good one.
328
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,327
OK, I gotta go.
329
00:20:11,361 --> 00:20:13,329
I'd hug you, but I don't want
to get my wizard scent on you
330
00:20:13,363 --> 00:20:15,231
before you tell your parents.
331
00:20:15,265 --> 00:20:17,033
Thinking!
332
00:20:17,067 --> 00:20:20,703
How about, um,
I give you a mind hug?
333
00:20:20,737 --> 00:20:24,407
OK. I'll give you one, too.
334
00:20:25,909 --> 00:20:29,045
Oh... That's nice.
335
00:20:29,079 --> 00:20:33,019
Romeo, Juliet, let's wrap
it up with the looky-looks.
336
00:20:33,054 --> 00:20:36,284
Oh, hey, Oprah.
337
00:20:36,318 --> 00:20:38,289
That's not Oprah. That's Alex.
338
00:20:38,323 --> 00:20:42,258
No, that's Oprah. She comes
in and orrs the Nosfera-Tuna.
339
00:20:42,293 --> 00:20:45,163
[chuckles] It's hilarious
when they call out "Oprah"
340
00:20:45,197 --> 00:20:47,600
and everybody looks
around and it's just me.
341
00:20:48,536 --> 00:20:50,204
Oh, that's never not funny.
342
00:20:57,246 --> 00:21:01,282
Ah! Harper. u're getting
really good at that.
343
00:21:01,316 --> 00:21:02,650
I am?
344
00:21:02,784 --> 00:21:06,419
No. Of course not.
This whole subway theme is stupid.
345
00:21:09,356 --> 00:21:12,658
Mom, Dad, I've gotta talk to
you about the Van Heusens.
346
00:21:12,692 --> 00:21:14,459
Have you figured out
a way to destroy them
347
00:21:14,727 --> 00:21:17,394
and send them into t
bowels of the Earth?
348
00:21:17,428 --> 00:21:21,165
No, actually. Not all the
Van Heusens are evil.
349
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:23,436
What? They have stolen
all our business
350
00:21:23,471 --> 00:21:26,004
and forced us into
this subway nonsense.
351
00:21:26,039 --> 00:21:28,807
I've hated that car since
I rst heard someone
352
00:21:28,841 --> 00:21:32,411
at an auction say, "Sold.
To the guy eating a sandwich."
353
00:21:32,444 --> 00:21:35,612
I got a great deal.
They included the tow.
354
00:21:37,182 --> 00:21:39,148
The Van Heusens are evil.
355
00:21:39,183 --> 00:21:41,317
And so is anybody relad to them,
356
00:21:41,351 --> 00:21:43,119
friends with them,
or eats at their restaurant.
357
00:21:44,355 --> 00:21:46,924
Now, what did you want
to tell us, honey?
358
00:21:46,958 --> 00:21:50,828
That... uh...
359
00:21:50,862 --> 00:21:54,599
the average temperature of an
igloo is 61 degrees Fahrenheit
360
00:21:54,633 --> 00:21:57,537
when there's people in it.
That's ice!
361
00:21:57,571 --> 00:22:01,142
That's nice, sweetie.
Maybe someday you can grow up,
362
00:22:01,176 --> 00:22:06,882
buy an igloo at an auction and build a
whole restaurant around it, just like your
father.
363
00:22:06,916 --> 00:22:08,983
I am an entrepreneur!
364
00:22:09,018 --> 00:22:13,388
Dude! you can't come
clean about Juliet.
365
00:22:13,422 --> 00:22:15,758
When they find out,
there's gonna be chaos.
366
00:22:16,159 --> 00:22:19,994
And that's the chaos I'm going to need to
cover my plan to send Max away for the
summer.
367
00:22:20,028 --> 00:22:23,997
There's this magical, underwater
seahorse ranch th's all filled up,
368
00:22:24,032 --> 00:22:27,367
but I've got him slowly
moving up that wait list...
369
00:22:27,401 --> 00:22:28,267
[spluttering]
370
00:22:28,435 --> 00:22:31,939
Giddy-up, Max. Giddy-up!
371
00:22:34,675 --> 00:22:37,978
Justin, I told my parents.
372
00:22:38,012 --> 00:22:40,246
Wow, that was quick.
373
00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:42,581
Didn't take long to say,
"I like Justin."
374
00:22:42,615 --> 00:22:44,849
And for them to say, "What?!"
375
00:22:44,884 --> 00:22:46,251
How did your parents take it?
376
00:22:46,285 --> 00:22:48,652
Yeah, um...
377
00:22:48,687 --> 00:22:50,787
I'm gonna need another day with it.
378
00:22:50,822 --> 00:22:53,156
I don't think you're going
to have another day.
379
00:22:53,190 --> 00:22:55,758
You might have another five
seconds to squeeze it in.
380
00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:57,292
What are you talking about?
381
00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:04,131
We've come to reclaim our daughter!
382
00:23:07,835 --> 00:23:09,636
Yeah.
383
00:23:11,005 --> 00:23:14,507
- Who are you?
- Alucard Van Heusen.
384
00:23:14,541 --> 00:23:17,843
And this is my wife, Cindy. Hi.
385
00:23:18,945 --> 00:23:21,413
Of all the sneaky tricks to use.
386
00:23:21,447 --> 00:23:24,983
Sending ur boy over to play
with my Juliet's affections.
387
00:23:25,017 --> 00:23:28,419
That is w, even for a wizard.
388
00:23:30,922 --> 00:23:33,957
Like six feet in the ground low?
Huh, vampire?
389
00:23:33,991 --> 00:23:36,726
Honey, you may want to
stay out of this one.
390
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:41,297
Your husband's right.
You've unleashed the wrath of Alucard.
391
00:23:44,166 --> 00:23:47,901
Please pretend you're scared or I'll
have to hear about it all night.
392
00:23:48,903 --> 00:23:53,672
Prepare to meet your doom!
393
00:23:53,707 --> 00:23:55,975
Oh, look. Oprah's here.
394
00:23:56,009 --> 00:23:58,777
Hi, Al. Cindy.
395
00:24:00,246 --> 00:24:01,846
Well, let's cut to it.
396
00:24:01,880 --> 00:24:03,714
Your son needs to stay
away from our daughter.
397
00:24:04,382 --> 00:24:06,817
She doesn't know what she's doing.
Her fangs haven't even come in yet.
398
00:24:08,853 --> 00:24:10,820
You're dating the competition?
399
00:24:10,855 --> 00:24:13,589
How could you do this to us?
400
00:24:13,624 --> 00:24:16,392
I might have expected
this from Alex, but you?
401
00:24:16,428 --> 00:24:20,263
What? Yeah, that's totally
something I would do.
402
00:24:24,166 --> 00:24:26,467
Dad, we really like each other.
403
00:24:26,505 --> 00:24:29,836
Oh, I get it.
404
00:24:29,871 --> 00:24:33,107
You sent your daughter here
to make him fall in love
405
00:24:33,141 --> 00:24:37,277
as part of your sick plan...
to destroy us.
406
00:24:37,312 --> 00:24:39,013
How would that destroy us?
407
00:24:40,815 --> 00:24:42,082
They're vampires!
408
00:24:43,485 --> 00:24:47,154
They're handsomer, smarter,
and more cunning than we are.
409
00:24:47,189 --> 00:24:52,259
They're like... shaved
wolves that can vote.
410
00:24:53,861 --> 00:24:56,496
Daddy, Mom, the moments
I've spent with Justin
411
00:24:56,530 --> 00:24:59,032
have been the best 25
minutes of my life.
412
00:25:00,468 --> 00:25:04,370
Well, those moments
are over. Come on.
413
00:25:05,472 --> 00:25:07,206
- [window thumping]
- [bats squeaking]
414
00:25:07,241 --> 00:25:09,475
Daddy.
415
00:25:18,719 --> 00:25:21,755
Smarter than us, huh? Really?
416
00:25:32,358 --> 00:25:35,327
Excuse me. Can you
turn down that sound?
417
00:25:35,361 --> 00:25:38,930
Yeah, I get it. It's a subway.
I just want my coffee.
418
00:25:38,964 --> 00:25:42,699
Look, we're selling the experience
of being underground in a subway,
419
00:25:42,734 --> 00:25:46,836
and friendly, courteous service,
so shut up and enjoy it.
420
00:25:50,207 --> 00:25:52,575
I know what you're thinking,
421
00:25:52,609 --> 00:25:56,145
that I'm threatened by this new girl
that's become a part of Justin's life.
422
00:25:56,179 --> 00:25:59,314
Well, I'm not. He likes to
dabble with the exotic types,
423
00:25:59,348 --> 00:26:02,049
the werewolves,
the centaurs and the vampires.
424
00:26:02,083 --> 00:26:05,718
But "Old Steady" is
gonna win this race.
425
00:26:07,888 --> 00:26:09,455
Good for you, Harper.
426
00:26:09,489 --> 00:26:12,757
You want to know who Old
Steady is? This girl.
427
00:26:21,099 --> 00:26:22,666
[whispering] Oh, Juliet.
428
00:26:24,202 --> 00:26:26,902
Oh, Justin.
429
00:26:29,539 --> 00:26:31,539
Juliet, what are you doing?
430
00:26:31,574 --> 00:26:36,376
Staring at nothing. 'Cause
that's all I have, is nothing.
431
00:26:36,411 --> 00:26:39,446
No, you're staring at a bat cage.
432
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,381
OK, if you don't want me
to stare at a bat cage
433
00:26:41,415 --> 00:26:42,715
and you don't want
me to date Justin,
434
00:26:43,250 --> 00:26:44,283
I might as well stare at this wall.
435
00:26:44,718 --> 00:26:48,053
Whoo! I had no idea 2,
000 years of adolescence
436
00:26:48,088 --> 00:26:49,621
would be this difficult.
437
00:26:49,656 --> 00:26:52,423
Really, Juliet,
stop being so dramatic.
438
00:26:52,458 --> 00:26:55,326
Wonder where she gets that?
439
00:26:55,360 --> 00:26:58,330
And Juliet, if you don't
stop staring at this wall,
440
00:26:58,364 --> 00:27:00,997
I shall take a wrecking ball to it!
441
00:27:01,032 --> 00:27:04,534
I would actually like that.
Then I could see Justin through it!
442
00:27:04,568 --> 00:27:07,503
Sweetie, I know you're upset, I do.
443
00:27:07,537 --> 00:27:10,239
But I don't know why you're
so infatuated with him.
444
00:27:10,273 --> 00:27:13,608
He's fangless and has
no pasty complexion.
445
00:27:15,277 --> 00:27:18,312
OK, well you two have been
together for 10,000 years.
446
00:27:18,346 --> 00:27:21,648
You've forgotten how hard it
is to meet someone special.
447
00:27:21,682 --> 00:27:24,050
Well, don't worry about it,
darling.
448
00:27:24,084 --> 00:27:25,484
You'll meet someone else.
449
00:27:25,619 --> 00:27:27,754
There are other bats in the cave.
450
00:27:30,323 --> 00:27:35,325
Yes, there are plenty of young dapper
fellows who come in here all the time.
451
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:38,360
Well, look. Look at him.
He's perfect.
452
00:27:38,395 --> 00:27:40,095
- Him? No. No!
- Oh!
453
00:27:40,129 --> 00:27:41,530
- He's perfect!
- Not him.
454
00:27:41,564 --> 00:27:43,499
Hello, young man. Yes, hi.
455
00:27:43,533 --> 00:27:46,470
I'd like to introduce you
to our daughter, Juliet.
456
00:27:46,504 --> 00:27:51,008
Great... I think this is diet.
457
00:27:51,042 --> 00:27:55,078
What are you guys trying to do? He's,
like, 45 years old.
458
00:27:55,112 --> 00:27:57,949
Yes, but you're 2000.
What difference does it make?
459
00:27:57,984 --> 00:28:00,752
He's not Justin.
That's the difference.
460
00:28:02,188 --> 00:28:05,022
I've been alive for a long time
and I've never felt this way.
461
00:28:05,057 --> 00:28:07,057
You can't just push someone on me.
462
00:28:07,092 --> 00:28:09,193
'Twas fate's dart
that found my Justin.
463
00:28:09,227 --> 00:28:11,830
[scoffs] Remember,
you're a teenager.
464
00:28:11,865 --> 00:28:17,169
It was, like, totally, fate's dart
that found Justin and stuff, you know?
465
00:28:17,203 --> 00:28:19,571
We're done with this discussion.
466
00:28:19,605 --> 00:28:22,106
Get your mind off this
and get back to work.
467
00:28:22,141 --> 00:28:24,508
That man needs a regular soda!
468
00:28:24,543 --> 00:28:26,810
What's the point of working
if I don't have a future?
469
00:28:26,845 --> 00:28:29,880
If I can't be with Justin,
I'd rather die!
470
00:28:29,915 --> 00:28:31,148
Again!
471
00:28:31,182 --> 00:28:35,419
Oh! Oh! So dramatic!
[dramatic laughter]
472
00:28:42,093 --> 00:28:45,595
The specials today are...
473
00:28:45,630 --> 00:28:49,232
What am I talking about?
There's nothing special about today.
474
00:28:49,267 --> 00:28:51,568
There's nothing special
about tomorrow.
475
00:28:51,602 --> 00:28:54,270
There's nothing special ever.
476
00:29:01,345 --> 00:29:02,911
Oh, my gosh, Justin.
477
00:29:02,946 --> 00:29:05,480
You've got to get over
your 25-minute girlfriend.
478
00:29:07,383 --> 00:29:09,384
You know what I figured out?
479
00:29:09,419 --> 00:29:11,954
I fall in love fast.
480
00:29:11,988 --> 00:29:14,423
But you know what's
different about this time?
481
00:29:14,457 --> 00:29:16,558
When I'm not with her...
482
00:29:18,294 --> 00:29:20,461
...my heart hurts.
483
00:29:25,702 --> 00:29:28,036
I believe you.
484
00:29:28,071 --> 00:29:30,638
Normally you pout for 30 minutes,
485
00:29:30,673 --> 00:29:32,874
and then I wave an action
figure in front of your face
486
00:29:32,908 --> 00:29:34,108
and you're fine.
487
00:29:35,644 --> 00:29:37,945
Not this time.
488
00:29:37,979 --> 00:29:40,948
This is one crime Captain Jim
Bob Sherwood can't solve.
489
00:29:40,982 --> 00:29:43,117
Oh my gosh, please come with me.
490
00:29:46,421 --> 00:29:50,390
OK. Put these on.
491
00:29:50,425 --> 00:29:54,261
- Why?
- Because I'm going to help you.
492
00:29:54,295 --> 00:29:56,496
Why?
493
00:29:56,531 --> 00:29:58,965
Because your sadness
grosses me out. OK?
494
00:30:03,271 --> 00:30:06,307
There. Now you and Juliet
can continue to date.
495
00:30:06,341 --> 00:30:11,612
While you have the glasses on, everybody
will see you as a completely different
person.
496
00:30:14,916 --> 00:30:16,851
Oh, but those glasses
are on a loan.
497
00:30:16,885 --> 00:30:18,986
I'm going to need them
back at a moment's notice.
498
00:30:19,020 --> 00:30:21,088
Why?
499
00:30:21,122 --> 00:30:23,724
It's a part of my plan
to get rid of Max.
500
00:30:23,959 --> 00:30:27,527
There's this guy coming over whose kid is
number one on the wait-list for seahorse
camp.
501
00:30:27,562 --> 00:30:30,130
He has to think I'm camp director.
502
00:30:31,065 --> 00:30:32,999
That didn't make any sense.
503
00:30:33,501 --> 00:30:36,403
That's why I need the glasses, dude. If
those words don't come out of a grown-up's
mouth
504
00:30:36,438 --> 00:30:40,741
we're stuck with Jerry "the
Terminator" Seinfeld all summer.
505
00:30:40,775 --> 00:30:42,809
[choking up] And I just can't...
506
00:30:47,815 --> 00:30:51,585
So there we were, yelling,
"The British are coming!"
507
00:30:51,619 --> 00:30:55,822
You were there, in 1776,
during the Revolutionary War?
508
00:30:55,856 --> 00:30:57,757
I thought it was just Paul Revere.
509
00:30:57,791 --> 00:30:59,859
Yeah, Paul "Check me
out over here" Revere.
510
00:30:59,894 --> 00:31:02,429
That guy was such an attention hog.
511
00:31:04,999 --> 00:31:09,869
Oh! Hey, it's true.
Vampires don't show up in mirrors.
512
00:31:09,903 --> 00:31:13,539
Yeah, doing our hair
is total guesswork.
513
00:31:13,573 --> 00:31:15,908
But hey, I mean...
514
00:31:17,477 --> 00:31:20,512
Look at Juliet with that new boy.
515
00:31:20,547 --> 00:31:22,414
They're so sweet together.
516
00:31:22,448 --> 00:31:24,816
Juliet really seems
to be enjoying him.
517
00:31:24,850 --> 00:31:26,517
I knew we did the right thing,
518
00:31:26,552 --> 00:31:29,955
keeping her away from
that Russo urchin.
519
00:31:29,989 --> 00:31:35,127
And you know I could have unleashed
my wrath on him any time I wanted to.
520
00:31:35,162 --> 00:31:37,230
I know, honey. OK.
521
00:31:39,867 --> 00:31:42,168
- [head clangs]
- Oh, God!
522
00:31:46,773 --> 00:31:49,609
Psst! Justin, it's time.
Give me the glasses.
523
00:31:49,643 --> 00:31:52,178
Uh. I'm in the middle of something.
524
00:31:52,212 --> 00:31:55,347
Sheriff boy's father's here.
It's now or never.
525
00:32:01,254 --> 00:32:04,289
Good luck, you two.
I'm rooting for you.
526
00:32:04,324 --> 00:32:07,125
[gasps] Justin Russo!
527
00:32:08,894 --> 00:32:10,795
A wizard trick. [hisses]
528
00:32:10,829 --> 00:32:15,099
Juliet, get away from him.
We forbade you to see him.
529
00:32:15,134 --> 00:32:18,869
Sorry, sir. But I would never do anything
to harm your daughter or your business.
530
00:32:18,903 --> 00:32:24,275
We thought she was with a nice
boy from... [hisses]...school.
531
00:32:24,309 --> 00:32:27,511
That's what I've been trying
to tell you. He is a nice boy.
532
00:32:27,545 --> 00:32:30,080
There's no difference between
Justin and the boy you saw.
533
00:32:30,115 --> 00:32:31,849
Why can't you just let us be happy?
534
00:32:33,685 --> 00:32:35,719
With all due respect, Mr.
and Mrs. Van Heusen,
535
00:32:35,853 --> 00:32:38,254
this restaurant feud is
between you and my parents.
536
00:32:38,289 --> 00:32:40,490
Juliet and I have
nothing to do with it.
537
00:32:41,959 --> 00:32:45,662
Please let us be together.
I really care about Juliet.
538
00:32:45,696 --> 00:32:47,931
- Uh...
- Mmmm...
539
00:32:47,965 --> 00:32:50,566
Uh...
540
00:32:51,435 --> 00:32:54,437
Oh, Come on, Alucard.
541
00:32:54,471 --> 00:32:57,473
You're an old romantic softie.
542
00:32:58,975 --> 00:33:03,146
Remember when we were young and in love,
like, 1,000 years ago?
543
00:33:04,715 --> 00:33:08,617
Seems like just yesterday we
were drinking King Arthur.
544
00:33:10,587 --> 00:33:13,188
Is that a brand of soda?
545
00:33:13,222 --> 00:33:16,158
Yes, as far as you know.
546
00:33:17,727 --> 00:33:20,529
You can see Juliet
as often as you want.
547
00:33:20,564 --> 00:33:25,167
But remember, I am capable
of unleashing my wrath
548
00:33:25,201 --> 00:33:26,969
as long as I'm not distracted.
549
00:33:27,003 --> 00:33:32,641
Hey, it's not unlimited sauces.
You get one.
550
00:33:33,977 --> 00:33:36,979
Way to unleash that wrath.
551
00:33:37,013 --> 00:33:39,481
You've inspired me, Mr.
and Mrs. Van Heusen.
552
00:33:39,516 --> 00:33:41,750
I'm sure when my parents see
how happy I am with Juliet
553
00:33:41,784 --> 00:33:43,785
they'll be just as
accepting as you are.
554
00:33:45,988 --> 00:33:47,656
Absolutely not.
555
00:33:49,124 --> 00:33:50,424
What are you thinking?
556
00:33:50,792 --> 00:33:52,326
Those people are trying
to steal our business!
557
00:33:53,128 --> 00:33:56,731
We will not let you betray this family,
Justin. I don't care how happy you are.
558
00:33:56,765 --> 00:33:58,466
Well, as a mother,
I care about your happiness.
559
00:33:58,634 --> 00:34:01,068
But as a restaurant owner, I don't.
560
00:34:01,103 --> 00:34:05,505
The Van Heusens were accepting,
loving and tolerant of us.
561
00:34:05,540 --> 00:34:07,207
And they sleep in coffins!
562
00:34:07,241 --> 00:34:09,976
They're actually
roomier than you think.
563
00:34:10,011 --> 00:34:15,282
With the lid open and with bedding,
you barely notice it's a coffin.
564
00:34:17,986 --> 00:34:20,053
I could have never
seen this coming.
565
00:34:20,088 --> 00:34:24,625
Alex, you are officially the
good child of the family.
566
00:34:24,659 --> 00:34:27,662
- "Good child?"
- Mm-hm.
567
00:34:27,696 --> 00:34:30,364
You're calling me the good child?
568
00:34:30,398 --> 00:34:35,002
Think about that.
What has Justin done wrong?
569
00:34:35,036 --> 00:34:37,938
He fell in love with
somebody. Big deal.
570
00:34:37,973 --> 00:34:40,574
I'm the one who's been
trying to get Max sent off
571
00:34:40,608 --> 00:34:43,177
to an undersea camp for the summer.
572
00:34:43,211 --> 00:34:45,579
You're trying to get
rid of your brother?
573
00:34:45,613 --> 00:34:47,881
Yeah, but it didn't
really work out.
574
00:34:47,915 --> 00:34:51,985
The, uh, wizard kid's father
actually was a wizard cop.
575
00:34:52,019 --> 00:34:56,557
He recognized my voice from something
else you don't want to know about.
576
00:34:58,227 --> 00:35:02,464
Look, Daddy, Justin should
be allowed to date Juliet
577
00:35:02,498 --> 00:35:06,668
and you guys should be
focused on punishing me
578
00:35:06,702 --> 00:35:10,205
for what I almost did to Max,
and the other thing that I did.
579
00:35:11,941 --> 00:35:14,742
She's right, Jerry.
580
00:35:14,777 --> 00:35:17,712
Our feud with the Van
Heusens has blinded us
581
00:35:17,746 --> 00:35:20,415
to something a little
more important.
582
00:35:21,884 --> 00:35:24,553
Our son's happiness.
583
00:35:24,587 --> 00:35:27,756
Justin, Juliet...
You guys can date.
584
00:35:27,791 --> 00:35:29,224
[both] Yes! Whoo!
585
00:35:29,325 --> 00:35:32,627
- [Juliet] So it's official.
- Not until...
586
00:35:32,661 --> 00:35:34,462
...I write it on the white board.
587
00:35:36,432 --> 00:35:38,433
Some people might find that weird,
588
00:35:38,467 --> 00:35:40,502
but I just think it's charming.
589
00:35:40,536 --> 00:35:42,170
I'll hold the marker cap.
590
00:35:45,441 --> 00:35:47,542
I see what you did here.
591
00:35:47,577 --> 00:35:50,646
You made a sacrifice
for your brother.
592
00:35:52,282 --> 00:35:54,783
You really are the good child.
593
00:35:54,817 --> 00:35:57,419
Daddy, please don't say that.
Makes me uncomfortable.
594
00:35:57,453 --> 00:35:59,020
I know, that's why I'm
gonna keep saying it.
595
00:35:59,188 --> 00:36:00,288
- You're the good child.
- Daddy...
596
00:36:00,656 --> 00:36:02,424
- You're the good child.
- Stop it!
597
00:36:02,458 --> 00:36:04,293
- Alex is good!
- No!
598
00:36:04,327 --> 00:36:05,794
Someone did something good.
It's Alex!
599
00:36:06,263 --> 00:36:08,464
- No, I did not do that!
- Yes! You're good!
600
00:36:10,146 --> 00:36:13,448
And that's the definition
of the word "the."
601
00:36:15,484 --> 00:36:17,151
What's going on?
602
00:36:17,186 --> 00:36:19,120
Alex almost sent you
away to an undersea camp
603
00:36:19,154 --> 00:36:20,955
where everyone rides seahorses.
604
00:36:23,725 --> 00:36:28,395
Oh, my gosh. I would love that!
605
00:36:29,864 --> 00:36:33,367
Oh, Alex, you are a great sister.
You're really great.
606
00:36:33,401 --> 00:36:36,103
I'm gonna work on an
impression of you all summer.
607
00:36:37,673 --> 00:36:39,640
Max, please.
I'm begging you not to.
608
00:36:39,674 --> 00:36:43,478
"Max, please.
I'm begging you not to."
609
00:36:43,512 --> 00:36:44,579
Please leave me alone.
610
00:36:45,648 --> 00:36:47,282
"Please leave me alone."
611
00:36:47,316 --> 00:36:48,783
- Stop it!
- "Stop it!"
612
00:36:48,818 --> 00:36:50,652
- Stop!
- "Stop!"
613
00:36:50,653 --> 00:36:54,653
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
45021
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.