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Is he under the bed?
Where did he go?

came with that choice.

- You need to get out
from under the bed.
- Hmm.

Come on.
We're gonna start your routine.

I don't even care if you brushed
your teeth this morning.

Listen, mommy has
her Tuesday meeting,

which means you've got to get up
because I've got to get to work.

Okay, I don't have time to play.

Nick's not going to
cooperate games.

Nicholas,
this isn't funny anymore.

All right?

You need to come out.

What's the matter, babe?

- I can't do.
- Listen. Come here.
Come here.

Can you at least
come here and talk to me?

- I'm not the enemy.
- Nope.

I constantly feel like
I'm barely holding my life
together.

It's really frustrating me
right now what's going on.

And I really need you to get up.

Nick, come on.

Nick just started
the third grade.

He got diagnosed
with ADHD in January.

Nick, come on.

Getting ready for school
is totally impossible

because he's just rolling around
on the floor

and decided that he doesn't
want to listen to me.

What... what can I do?
What can I do to
make this easier?

We need to get to school.

It's like hyperactive
and stubborn, and defiant.

Totally defiant.

We have got to get out of here
by like 8:15.

I mean, nobody tells you
how to parent to begin with.

And then they don't tell you
how to parent a kid

that has any kind of need
that's outside of the norm.

I felt like I'm constantly
yelling at him.

- Oh, jeez, guys,
it's 7:45.

7:45?

Um, so, I'm gonna just make
some coffee,

and go get myself dressed,
and we're gonna need to get out
of the door.

We had three meetings
with his teachers in, like,
the first two weeks.

I had multiple emails
because he was acting out

and he was not
following directions.

- Got it, Nick?
- Mm-hmm.

So, looks like you need to
brush your hair.

His teacher is clearly
frustrated.

He must be getting
reprimanded constantly.

...on there. Over there.

And he'd come home
saying he hated school
and he was stupid.

It's heartbreaking.

Ignition, three, two, one!

In two months,

Scott Kelly will begin
a year-long stay in space.

- So, good luck, Captain.
We're proud of you.

I remember in the second
grade my mother took me
to my grandmother's

to help me learn how to read.

I remember
after the second session,

my grandmother saying
to my mom...

..."You know,
this kid is stupid.

"And he will never learn
how to read.

"And I'm not doing
this anymore."

Oh, you know,
we had six nominations
and we won three already.

Um, we lost one of them.
There's two more to go.

I can't wait to perform.

There was a couple of teachers
that were like,

"You need to focus better.
You're always dazing off."

Because I had like A's
and C's and B's

but I had a lot of U's
because of my hyperactivity.

Fitness guru, Jillian Michaels.
Jillian, great to have you here.

My whole life I just
thought, "Oh, well, I can't
learn it. Or I'm no good at it."

I mean, I must have been in
summer school

every single year from 12 to 18.

"Is she just stupid?"
"Is she not trying hard enough?"

"Is she not applying herself?"

I got to the airport
a little bit late,

and I thought I was going to
miss the plane, right?

So, I was trying to catch it.

But that's so hard
because those things
go, like, 600 miles an hour.

I never went to a therapist.
Nobody ever talked about it.

I was just as quirky,
out of control kid

with, uh, very few friends
and social skills.

But now I know why.

When's the last time
you saw the head of an airline

show up on one of his flights

and not only talk
to his passengers,

but treat them like people?

Do you like to have
a chocolate chip cookie?

When I took the ACT, I got
so low on the English portion

that my counselor said,

"Had you just answered C
on every question,

"you would have scored higher."

Carter saved her best till last.

There is a new queen
of the shot put.

You're slow.
You're stupid. You're lazy.

How come you just can't get it?
I showed you ten times.

What's wrong with you?

You see a whole display
of your own shoes.

Are you used to that already?

No, I'm not...
I'm not used to it.

- So, how do you feel?
- It feels great.

Because you're falling
behind in class

your self-esteem goes down
because you think you're dumb.

- Let's go, Joe?
- What's wrong with me?

Why can't I focus?
Why can't I learn?

The word that kept coming out
from this, as I look back,
was he's a hyper boy.

It just grinds you down
into thinking you're stupid.

I'm stupid. I'm stupid.
I'm stupid.

Can't sit still, disorganized,

- can't focus, lazy, stupid...
- Annoying, disorganized...

- Complacent.
- Crazy.

- You can't make it.
- You never listen.

- You don't clean your room.
- Disorganized.

It's a super skill set.

And fuck what people think.

You know, by cleaning that
up that means

- putting too much pressure.
- No.

- I emptied the dishwasher.
It's all clean.
- Dad already did the first part.

- You're gonna put that
in the dishwasher.
- All of it?

- Yes. It's so good.
- Even this...
- Yeah. No. All of it.

Yeah.

It's all nice and empty for you,
ready to go.

It's all nice and empty.
Thanks, Dad.

You're welcome.
I do what I can.

When we were getting
in the process of adoption,

like, I hoped for a little boy,
like, Hogan.

I didn't know it would be
so hard to raise a Hogan.

- I know I could have...
- Can I just?

No, you can get it. All right.

I'm just gonna get
this little bit out.

Okay. Well, then why don't you
just do the dishes?

No, I don't want to
do the dishes.

I... No, you're welcome
to do. I really... I'm
really fine with it.

- Really.
- I just want you to do
them correctly.

When we used to take him hiking
it used to drive Troy crazy

because we would hike together

and just, like, we're going
from here to here.

We're going to hike
to see this waterfall.

But with Hogan, it was like
we're gonna stop

and look at every single leaf
on the ground.

Or here's a little pile
of things that I've got to
play in for a while.

Whoo!

I think first grade
was the first time a teacher
ever mentioned ADHD.

I'm sure I was super offended
at the time

because I just was not...

Really wasn't on my radar
at that time

like, he was very energetic
but he's also so fun.

I definitely think that
it comes easier to other people.

Or to maybe comes easier
to other people

to, like, stop and think
before they do something.

It feels, like, I'm always,
like, changing...

In my mind,
I'm always changing subjects.

And it's almost like
spinning in my head.

It really did start to
affect everything, his grades.

We were noticing it at home.

It was affecting
his friendships.

He just was struggling.

This week's been really
hard week for me.

I almost got out of test.

I got in an argument
with my teacher.

I got almost in an argument
with the assistant principal.

Uh... It's been really tough.

- Hogan?
- Yeah.

- It's time to go.
- Okay.

It makes me emotional
just in terms of...

It helps explain some things.

It doesn't change anything
about how he's gonna have to
navigate in this world.

We got to go.

It's fascinating,
but when I started
to research my book,

I was stunned to see that ADHD
was the number one most searched
term on the internet.

And, I mean, who would
have figured that.

I mean, I'm thinking
you got to be kidding, right?

Where did that come from?

Probably the easiest way
to understand ADHD

is to look at
what it stands for.

Attention Deficit
Hyperactivity Disorder.

So, you have a deficit
in attention and hyperactivity.

Oh, God, the name is awful,
Attention Deficit
Hyperactivity Disorder.

It's a terrible name.

You got a deficit.
You've got a disorder.

Man, you are... You're sick,
you got problems.

The very name trivializes
the nature of the disorder

by selecting one of its most
superficial symptoms

as the name for the disorder.

I think that the public believes
that ADHD is a made-up disorder

for people who are lazy
and trying to cover up.

Skeptics would say
ADHD is just an excuse
for forgetting your keys.

We all forget our keys.

I think part of the reason
is because if you look
at the symptoms of ADHD,

all of them are things
that are typical in everybody
to some extent.

You get distracted,
your mind wanders.

- Losing things.
- Impulsivity.

They miss deadlines.
They're always running behind.

Not sitting still.

Exquisitely sensitive
to rejection.

- Problems focusing.
- Daydream.

Difficulties with inhibition.

Difficulty regulating
their emotions.

- Interrupting.
- Trouble organizing.

Problem solving.
Decision making.
The list goes on and on.

We really try to
pay attention to

all of their behaviors
across different settings.

And we also think about
how these behaviors,

if they have them,
are affecting them.

So, is it causing them
some distress or impairment
in their life?

...for a second.

More with fingers.

Fingers like that. Remember?
Can you deal with that?

Nick really struggles
with transitions.

So, going from being home,
having lots of family time,

seeing his mom and dad a lot
to go into school
threw him for a complete loop.

He was totally out of sorts.

Nothing about that school
environment felt right for him.

All right. Nicholas, I love you.
Give me a kiss.

I love you, Mom.

There's this
misconception that if the child
is motivated enough

that they will comply,

they will do the things
they need to do.

But the fact is that
it's not a matter of willpower.

It's a matter of the dynamics
of the chemistry of the brain.

I spend my every waking moment
trying to get outside
of my own head

because it's a mess in there.

It's very busy.

Your brain is always firing,
you're firing at 1000 miles
an hour,

your eight cylinders
by eight cylinders, 24/7, 365.

It is like
I'm juggling 20 balls,

but I don't remember
where they were in the air.

I'm just there trying to kind of
catch all these balls
and I remember nothing.

Imagine somebody sitting
on the keys of the computer.
That's what your brain is like.

That's ADHD.

So, what's happened
in the last 10 or 20 years

is more specific understanding
of the neurology behind it.

An area in the brain
that is somewhat different

is the connection
between the prefrontal cortex
and the caudate.

The area for emotional control
and impulsivity.

So, the cortex is responsible
for thinking and problem solving

and underneath it
are these structures

that are part
of these complicated loops.

They take information
from the cortex,

bring it to the sub-cortex,
and bring it back to the cortex.

So, this is a big relay loop
where information is processed.

In ADHD, that relay
system sort of short circuits,

and so, it's almost chaotic.

Maybe a good way
to think about it

is if you were doing a really
challenging physics worksheet

and I'm blaring music
into your ears.

Plus, I'm making you listen
to a lecture,

plus, I'm having you
write some things,

plus, somebody is tapping
on you.

That's, essentially,
what it feels like
to the ADHD brain.

They have every desire
to just finish the worksheet

but they just cannot focus
their attention enough
to persist and stay on task.

Yeah, look, almost building it.

See, I'm putting
some cheese in there.

Can I put some cheese in there?

Yeah, you can put
some cheese in there.

- What?
That's your mouth.

That's not the shell.

Whenever someone meets
Bear for the first time,

the first thing they always say,
"He's such a happy kid."

- Will Bear actually eat
all his food?

- Don't bet on it.

Bear started walking,
like, at 14 months.

Once he got the groove,
heh, he's like,
all over the place.

He is having so much fun.

But I never was thinking, like,
"Oh, you know, he has ADHD."

I mean, because
boys are normally
all over the place anyway.

But the tantrums
are just so intense.

Just the rolling things.

Screaming, stomping.

Jeez!

Just really, really, really
bad tantrums.

And it was really becoming
stressful in the household
because of it.

Okay, Bear.

No matter how many times
I would try to talk to him.

You have to calm down.

It's not a big deal.

Parenting a child
with ADHD is exhausting.

Basically, it's more stress.
It's a higher stress level.

It's a higher emotional
stress level and it's ongoing.

Come on.
Come, put your pajamas on.

Bear!

Bear.

We have defiance and refusal
and temper tantrums.

And now we have
a tornado in the family.

I like to think
of the ADHD brain
as being hungry for stimulation.

Any kind of sensory input is,
essentially, like its food.

And so, when it suddenly
gets hungry,

because it's a boring
situation or a boring task,
it goes in search of food.

And it goes in search of
different types
of stimulations.

Believe it or not even getting
yelled at does activate them
a little bit.

And so, if that's the only
stimulation they can get,
they'll work to get it.

How was school today?

Look.

This is a mountain.

Oh, okay.

So, I actually have ADHD
and I was diagnosed last year.

Um...

And there's certain things
that Bear would do

that I noticed that I would do
quite often.

And so, it just made me wonder
if, you know,

maybe he had that
and I know it's hereditary.

Have a good day at school today.

I will get a lot of phone calls
also from the school

saying he hit a kid
or bit someone

or, you know,
something like that.

I'll have to pick him,
like leave work and pick him up
from school.

It got so bad to the point
where something happened

where he got in to it
with his friend and in class.

The kid like took his glasses
and broke them.

So, he took that kid's glasses
and... and threw them
on the floor.

And then somehow the teacher
involved herself
and accidentally got scratched.

And then I get this call
from the school principal

saying, "Oh, Bear attacked
the teacher.
She's bleeding profusely."

And I'm like, "What!
What are you talking about?"
So, I get to the school.

And I see the teacher
has a tiny scratch,

just not bleeding profusely,
just a little Band-Aid.

And, at that point, they wanted
Bear to be expelled
from school...

which means
he'll miss graduating.

I will never have the experience
of watching my son graduate
from kindergarten.

And I'm still very, you know,
upset about that that he didn't
get that experience.

As many as 5%
of American children
suffer from ADHD...

Over the past decade
or two,

we've seen ADHD, uh,
diagnoses increase.

ADHD diagnoses
in the United States
for school kids

has increased by 43%
in less than ten years.

That number continues
to rise every year.

And chances are you probably
know someone who has it.

Is this an epidemic
that we're talking about here?

It, well, certainly,
feels like that.

ADHD is found in around
9% of American schoolchildren.

And that makes it
one of the most common diagnoses
in childhood.

We believe that ADHD,

when we look at surveys
across the world, universally,

it seems like about 5%
of the population has clinically
relevant ADHD symptoms.

In other parts of the
world, they're about 2 to 3%
or even less.

In America,
that number is higher.

It could be that
clinicians are becoming better
at diagnosing ADHD.

They have better tools
for diagnosing it,

the definition
has become clearer.

There's better education
for clinicians.

We can actually
identify these children

and really course correct
some of the trajectory

that they would have been on
if they didn't get
the diagnosis.

If we're looking at a
disorder that affects 10%
of the population,

is that really a disorder?

Or is that a variant of normal?

People interpret a rise
in diagnosis and treatment

as somehow,
we must be getting it wrong,

and we're over-diagnosing
and we just don't have evidence
of that.

Take a standpoint
of public health.

We want to be reaching
as many people as possible.

If there was a rise in diagnosis
of breast cancer,

we'd be celebrating that
because we'd be saying

"Yes, more women are doing
self-exams

"and getting their...
their examinations."

And so, a rise in the
identification and treatment
of people is actually good news.

Hi, my name is Rece Miller
and I have ADHD.

When Rece was born,

across the river
was a baseball game

- and fireworks were going off.

That's probably the first thing
he saw as a child,

were the fireworks
flying up in the sky.

- And out came the
firework himself right there.
- He was like...

- He was like the explosion.
- It was.

- That's when it all started.

We knew fairly soon
after he was born,

that there was something
totally challenging about him.

- Holly, what's the name of
the cartoon ?
- Shut up!

The energy level
was unbelievable.

The more he would go,
the more he would go.

You know, he was like, you know
they talk about
the Energizer Bunny.

Well, that was...
that was Rece.

- His battery never died.
- Never died.
- Never died.

And, literally, if he got
tired, he got more active.

- He got faster.
- Faster.

And when you're old...

- You're older parents...
- Here we go.

...we were, like,
"I just want a nap.

Please just let...
a little sleep."

I'm definitely misunderstood.

But, I also like
being a troublemaker.

It's fun. It's really fun.

I was looking at the picture
and I was playing and go,

"Whoa, I... I'm actually seeing
stores like in the cartoons."

It's a real thing.

Diagnosed ADHD in our
family, obviously, Rece,

my son, Dylan...

my daughter, Haley,
Bart, and me.

If you have one ADHD child,

then the risk
to the other children is 35%.

That is seven times higher
than the general population.

Did you hear your alarm?

- What's that?
- Did you hear your alarm?

- Yeah. I turned it off.
- Okay.

Most of the things that
go wrong in the mornings

and everywhere often are tied
in transitioning.

You know, he...
he's so slow to react.

Like, if we're in a big hurry,
I think he goes slower.

Yeah.

As I always say, when he hears
the word "hurry" and he goes...

- He's like... He's just...
- He slows down.

The reminders are huge
because it's...

it's almost like every day
is a clean slate,
you know, for him.

I have a lot of notes
around the house.

And, keep in mind,
this is just to get...

This is just to get me out
of the house and go to school.

Let me show you one of them.

Like, one of them is
"Do you have everything
for a great day?"

I was like, "Mom, what
the heck's wrong with you?
I don't need all these notes."

She was, like, "Yes, you do."

Then one day I didn't look
at the notes and I forgot stuff.

So, need to run back home
to get stuff.

And then we need
to go to school.

So, turns out that notes
actually work.

- No, I'm gonna check the outside
to see if there is a hole.
- No, I'll find it

Daddy will do it.
You just please relax.

- What?

Some mornings it's,
you know, all of a sudden,

I can't take anymore and I'm...
I'm yelling at him.

And I'm like,
"Rece, what is wrong with you?
Why are you...?"

You know, and he... he'll come
back with something, like,
"Everything, Dad."

And then I immediately
feel awful.

- What? You're behind.
- Right.

Let's go. Shoes. Coat.

- Love you, Dad.
- Love you.

See you after school.

- Are you good?
- Yep.

See you in a couple of hours.
Okay.

I love you.
I wish I could take you
to school,

you and Carson
would get along great.

- Rece. Seriously.
- I'm talking.

Go, go, go.

Okay.

So, if it's been a horrifying
morning, often,

um, I've gone back to school
and written a quick note,

and asked the Secretary
to give it to him...

because I could be very ugly.

Um, and I want him to know that
it's okay and I love him.

Good.

We diagnose ADHD
more in boys than in girls,

because boys tend to be
disruptive.

One at a time. Not bad, not bad.
Switch your partners, please.

Hyperactivity is the
hallmark of the diagnosis
in many school systems.

So, girls don't do that.

More than likely, as a girl,

you're not going
to get diagnosed
and often you get misdiagnosed.

Girls fidget a lot,
they may bite their nails,

they may twist their hair,
they may tap their toe,
but nobody sees it.

They're the daydreamer.

They're the girl that sits
in the back of the class

staring out the window
lost in her thoughts.

Usually, they are pretty smart,
so that they can use
their intellect to compensate.

And it's only if you can get
a window into their inner life

that you're going to find out
that they're struggling.

Hi, this is Zara
and I've been having
a really hard week.

It hasn't been going too well.
I've been worrying a lot.

And because I've been worrying
I feel I've been slacking a lot
in my homework.

That's been giving me
a lot of stress.

My life is a mess.

- Hey,
how are you, cutie?
- I'm good. How are you?

- Good.
Good to see you.
- It's good to see you.

- What did you bring?
- I brought my writing with me.

So, since I saw you
I guess like a month ago,

you were going to work
on a schedule.

- Which I did. Check.
- And bring your writing...

Zara was referred to me
by a colleague of mine.

She said,
"This will be a wasted brain..."

were her quotes,
"...if we do not help her."

I know you told me
in our first meeting

that a big concern
and issue is the time.

- Like, how you manage the time?
- Yeah.

- Right?
- Yeah, that's true.

Would you say, it's probably
the biggest source
of friction and frustration?

Yes, because I fail
to manage my time

I noticed that has put a lot of
tension in my family.

Okay. So...

Every morning my
was like
living hell.

My mom... I would do something,
it would tick my mother off

and then, like, a bomb,
she would explode.

And when I mean explode
she'd start lecturing me
and telling me do this do that.

No? Okay.

- So, I think that if we can
master this this summer...
- Mm-hmm.

...and really get our ADLs
that means activities
of daily living,

brushing teeth, eating,
things like that down pat,

that you will be in a better way
going to the school.

- The new school.
- Okay.

- Are you so excited?
- Yeah.

- About the new school?
- Yeah. In fact...

I love the family.
There are a great case.

But this is one of my most
challenging cases.

Okay, so, Khuda Hafiz,
have a good day.

- Okay. Hafiz.
- Be good.
- I will.

Savera wants nothing
more than for her daughter

to be happy
and have a well-adjusted life.

However, the impacts
and coming to terms with

this diagnosis of ADHD has
caused Savera great distress.

Have a good day at work.

Sixth grade
was a tough year for us.

There are certain basic
general traits, expectations,

that are associated
with a 13-year-old child.

And a certain set of skills
should be attained by that age.

And when your child
is not matching up with that,

you know
that there's something wrong.

Do you want to still...?
You can do it, but just keep it
from the leash.

You know, parents
often recognize earlier
than anybody else

that something's wrong,
something's different.

That can start to lead
to tension in that relationship.

Maybe I just have to step up
my discipline
and apply it more quickly,

and become more commanding,
and controlling,
and then this child will get it.

And so, the level of conflict
starts to go up

because the child starts
to react to that
in a negative way.

- Ahem, okay,
I brought my stuff for later.
- Okay.

- What's the password?
- Let me type the password in.

Come here.

ADHD wasn't even on our radar

because we didn't really
believe in it.

A big part of me thought
it was a bogus diagnosis.

I, frankly, thought that ADHD
was about hyperactive children,

particularly boys
who were literally
bouncing off the walls.

As the year went on,
there were just more
and more issues.

Every day there was
either a phone call
from the school

or an email from the teachers.

If it's not regarding her
late turning in homework,

or forgetting her homework
or not following
the morning routine,

seven months into sixth grade,

it was then about
the social side of the school.

Around this time we were
seeing issues with impulsivity

and seeing things
that you shouldn't,

and sometimes to the point
of being hurtful,

and... and, you know,
like of hurting others.

And I told her that
when you behave this way,

you are making us
as a family,
you're making us look bad.

You're sending
very negative vibes out there

about us as a family
and about yourself.

It has a toll
on your entire house,
everyone's relationship...

because the overall tone
is constant frustration, anger,
and anxiety, basically.

Have a great day.
Take time to do your test. Okay?

Why are you acting like that?

Why?

The danger in missing
this diagnosis in girls

is... is a lifetime
of underachievement,
depression, anxiety.

And I see it all the time.

You are well on your way
to a cooperation point tonight.

- So, if you want you can...
- Mm-hmm.

Do you wanna mark it
on your thing?

So, when my son was diagnosed,
the psychologist,

and she's running through
what was the results of nine
hours of testing that he had,

and I was like,
some large percent

of what you just read to me
resonates very deeply with me.

But, you were talking
about my son.

It's the distractibility
and the impulsivity,

interrupting or saying
the wrong thing.

I have to say what I'm thinking
when I'm thinking it,

and I have a really hard time
not saying it

and then I go,
"Oh, that was not
a good decision."

Let's go play basketball
right now.

All right. Let me just look
at these work text messages.

How long is it gonna take?

My kids get really
frustrated because
I'm not a great listener.

Um, so, like, they'll talk
to me and then I'll interrupt.

You always look at your call.

I know, I just want to respond
to the... I know, honey.

And my memory is just terrible.

I mean, I wonder if I have
like early Alzheimer's.

I mean, I've literally
had these thoughts.

Do I... Am I in dementia?
Like, what is going on?

I... I drank in the morning.

I do not drink in the morning.

I do not drink in the morning.

I drink a lot of coffee
in the morning.

I would drink probably
eight espressos a day.

And then I come home
and I drank at night.

- No, , Mom.
- Wanna play horse?

Yeah, I want to go first.

And it got to the point
where I was struggling

to get through a week
without drinking every night.

Make it seem...

If you have ADHD,
it is pretty common

for you to also have
some element of depression
and some element of anxiety.

Every aspect of life
can be negatively affected
by undiagnosed ADHD, everything.

I never feel like
I have it all together
and I feel like...

I've put on
a really good show. Um...

Marriage,
divorce rate is way higher.

Uh, achievement at work,
typically underachieved.

Substance use, big problem,
way more common in people
with ADHD.

I drank myself to slow down.

I was just self-medicating
and I didn't know why.

I used to watch the way people
would navigate socially.

And I would think like,
"Wow, how did they do that?"

Um, and you know, for me,
alcohol was a good way
to manage it.

If your mind is going
a million miles an hour,

and you take something that
slows you down and relaxes you,

you know, why wouldn't you
want to do that all the time?

People do think of it
as a deficit.

I... I would really question
whether that's really
a correct model.

There are some
very amazing things about
the ADHD brain.

You know, this is kind
of first time that

our modules
have been cross utilized...

Coming up with
connections between things that
other people would not see.

Why don't we do marketing?

You know, stepping back,
and like, envisioning

why things aren't working
and how you can do it better.

And then executing that
at a big picture scale.

Really good at that.

Some of the most creative
innovators of our time

in the sciences, in music,
in art, in business

turned out to have many
of the symptoms of ADHD.

And we benefit today
from their discoveries,

from their productions,

and it's made us a richer,
richer society.

The core triad of symptoms

are distractibility,
impulsivity, and hyperactivity.

But if you turn each one
of those on its head,
you get a positive.

The flipside of distractibility
is curiosity.

What's that? What's that?
What's that?

If you didn't care,
you wouldn't get distracted.

But you want to,
so, we're driven by curiosity.

It just started snowing.

Sometimes it gets us
into trouble
because we're too nosy,

but sometimes
we discover penicillin.

I just decided that I was going
to put some bowls
just like that.

And I wanted to collect
a bunch of snow

because I'm trying to make
this like ice cream stuff
that you make a snowman.

It never snows in Texas.

The flipside of
impulsivity, what is creativity?

But impulsivity gone right?

You don't plan to have
a creative thought.

You don't say. "It's 2:00,
time for my creative idea."
And lay it like an egg? No.

New ideas,
brilliant new insights,

come unbidden spontaneously,
impulsively.

"I'm from rough Mongolian
mountaintops to soft Silk Roads

"ancestors who kill
not knowing better.

"I'm Zara from Pakistan, India,
Afghanistan, Mongolia
and Norway. I'm..."

Zara is a brilliant writer.

Her poems, her writings are that

they're more superb
than students I've seen
in graduate school.

No exaggeration.

And then the third,
hyperactivity,

you get to be my age,
I'm 70 years old,
it's called energy.

You know I'm really glad
to have this little turbo pack
on my back.

So, you know, again,
in keeping with the way I see it

it's a mixture of positives
and negatives.

Yes, distractibility,
impulsivity, hyperactivity,

can be disruptive,
can be an impediment.

But, their flipside
are tremendous, inborn assets.

I think my ADD superpower

is the ability to look
at very complex situations

and find simple solutions to it.

Things that others have just
said it's just too difficult.

It... it's just not easy.

And they will test you
and they will provoke you
and they will break rules.

You've now become this big
businesswoman, aren't you?
17 product lines.

You're going to start
a hotel chain.

- Not a Hilton chain, your one.
- Yes.

This is big business.

I think it's made me
the businesswoman I am today.

I'm a risk taker. I'm creative.

My mind is always moving.

I'm always thinking
of new ways to do business.

And I think it really just
gives me this drive
and this edge.

And you just want to
get them through it alive

with their self-esteem intact,
with their... with their liking
themselves.

One, two, one, two, bam,
bam, bam, bam, bam.

The fact that I have
all these things going on
inside my head

I have an advantage
that other people don't.

Sometimes I describe
the superpower

of having like five computers
hooked up to one monitor.

And so your brain
is just constantly
taking in information,

processing data,
spitting out things
like ready to go.

So that's a huge superpower.

And processing what's
happening with the camera,

and all of these screens
in front of me,

plus, the teleprompter.

And, uh, the only reason why
I can do it is because of ADHD.

And the more intense it gets,
the better I am.

- Hi.
- How are you? I'm Lisa.

- Tommy, Tommy Gunn.
- Nice to meet you.
- My pleasure.

They are the ones
who are willing to really push

and take a chance and see it
all the way through.

That was by far the most
insane thing
I've ever done in my life.

Entrepreneurship is a natural
pathway for someone with ADHD

because what people with ADHD
crave more than anything else
is freedom.

They think outside the box.

They don't need to follow
all the rules the way the rest
of us do to get to the answer.

We change the way
campaigns were run

- and I think we're gonna win
tomorrow.

They have resilience,
grit, big heartedness.

I'll teach you the bridge
after this interview.

- Please do.
- Okay.

Because I can't figure it out.

No, it's not that hard,
I'll teach it to you.

Their sweet spot is
inflexible, creative, energetic.

Let's go, baby!

Multitasking types of settings.

And so oftentimes,

I see adults with ADHD
are in really creative fields.

Look what she's doing
a back flip, back flip.

Double, double! There it is.
That's the Biles!

That's what
we've been waiting for.

Hyper focus is probably
the best aspect of ADHD,
the greatest strike.

What's important to
understand is

that when something is
interesting, or exciting,

or absorbing to the kid
with ADHD,

their switch is not only
turned on,
it is on overdrive on.

And what does that mean?

It means that they can
hyper-focus.

Something that actually the rest
of us who want to focus on
might have difficulty doing.

We're reaching 125 million
consumers, today.

We're on 21 TV networks,
we're in 170,
out of home locations.

When I'm hyper-focused,

it doesn't matter
if a nuclear bomb is going off,
my house is on fire.

I... I won the lottery.

It would not matter.
There's nothing you can do
to get my brain...

I can take one subject matter

and I will be oblivious
to everything else happening
in the world.

Around ADHD
there's tremendous ignorance.

Most people are not aware
of the positives
that go with it.

We have a many more tools
in our toolbox.

What we need is to educate
more professionals.

And particularly,
in the strength-based approach
instead of a deficit disorder.

You need to look and see
whether the person with ADHD

has anything that
we could capitalize on,

and then do what
Michael Phelps' mother did,
and get those resources

that turn that from an aptitude
into a talent

that sets you apart
from other people.

But you have to be careful
not to extrapolate

because by saying
that it's an advantage,

it reduces the pressure
on people to help them.

So, tomorrow, um,

Bear has a prescription
for a medication
called Concerta.

- Bear.
- What?

Come on.

This pediatrician recommended
maybe starting him
on half a pill

um, just to see,
um, how he does.

Um, since like, this will be
like his first time ever taking,

you know,
a medicine of this type.

So, um, I think tomorrow

I'll probably go ahead
and do half a pill
and see how that goes.

I am hesitant about it
because he's just a little baby.

Because he's...
he's gone through so much

that it just might be good
for him to have it.

I want him to be able
to live his best life.

Oh! Oh, you're really good.

My main concern was
that the side effects
would be an issue.

And I wouldn't know
because he's a kid

and I'm... I'm not sure if he's
gonna tell me or if he will be
able to explain it.

You need a break? Okay.

And for myself,
I know when I started taking
medication,

I had really bad side effects
and I didn't like
how it made me feel.

So, I have this medicine here,
it's Concerta.

I hope this works.

Is that a medicine?

If you eat this,
I'll get you a toy,
whatever toy you want.

Just swallow it down,
don't chew it.

Just do.

If you feel weird,
you tell me, right away.

- Okay, mom.
- Pinky promise.

Okay, poopy.

Muah.

It was the most
horrendous experience.

And he was doing like these
weird movements with his mouth.

Do you feel okay?

Yes or no?

You feel weird or anything?

Very quiet, not really talking.

He was focused on drawing
this one thing
for a really long time.

And every time I would try
to pull him away from it,
he couldn't.

It was almost like
he was like in another world.

Hey, Bear!

So, now I'm thinking maybe
this medication is not...
is not right for him.

Everyone talks about
how quiet he is

and, you know,
he's not really that engaging.

And that's not like Bear at all.

I just called his, um, doctor

to see if, um, I can get
an emergency appointment
this week, um, right away.

Side effects were just not...
it's not worth it.

Unfortunately,
the state of the science
is trial and error.

We don't know in advance
which medication will work
for what person.

With my patients if they say
I'm not fun anymore,
I want to tinker with it

uh, tweak it to get
target symptom relief
with no negative side effects.

Of course, like all medicines,

I mean, stimulant medications
come with side effects.

To be honest,
I feel a little jittery.

Like, my heart feels
a little racy.

They have appetite suppression.

So, they don't eat as much.

Insomnia, so they...
they stay up later
than they ordinarily would have.

I don't feel like myself
or it hurts my personality.

But 80% of the time,
it's positive
without side effects.

If you see a doctor,
who knows how to manage it.

Where we are rock solid,
affirmative on,
with no exception,

is that by staying
on these medications,

we are not predisposing you
to becoming a drug user.

There is one fix
students are turning to

at an alarming rate
to get ahead.

Personally, in my social circle,
it's literally everyone.

We know they're being
abused by college students,

who feel that they're smart
pills or focus pills.

For individuals,
who do not have ADHD,
they'll feel that high.

And so, we find
that there's some abuse,

especially among college age
students who are not ADHD.

But for the ADHD child,
it sort of calms them.

There is more research
on the medicines we use
for treating ADHD

than there is on any
other medicine you
or anybody else will ever take.

And the reason that
there're so many studies on it
is we use them with kids.

But it gets turned
into a passionate debate

and people attacking
other people and...

Maybe there are too many kids
on Ritalin,

- maybe electric shock--
- How many kids on Ritalin,
Matt?

I'm just saying,
but... but aren't there examples
where it works?

Matt, Matt, Matt,
you don't even...

You're glim, you don't even know
what Ritalin is.

You know you're a bad person
because you take medication

or you're a bad doctor
because you prescribe
medication.

There has been a rush
to prescribe

for conditions which may
or may not be ADHD.

It seems to be sloppy medicine.

That's just... It's wrong
and it's hurtful and it's born
out of ignorance.

These drugs are
nowhere near as harmful as the
media have made them out to be.

So, you've been scared
unnecessarily

by overly sensationalized
stories about the hazards
of these medications.

I think it's a very
personal choice.

But it's important
to know the evidence.

And the evidence says medication
can be incredibly helpful.

It can help with
educational outcomes.

It can help with avoiding
substance use problems.

It can help with
social function.

- Did you take your
Adderall?
- Yeah, I took my Adderall.

I don't want to medicate
a child because
it's easier for me,

or easier for the school
or easier for the teacher.

I think in sixth grade
he... he was starting to notice.

I'm trying to have friends
and I'm trying to not get up
in people's space

and, um,
I'm not able to not do that.

He wanted the medicine
and he was the one that said,
"I think, if I have it, my..."

He said, "I think my friends
and my teachers
will like me better."

Dopamine is a brain chemical
and dopamine has two functions.

It has the function
of concentration,

but also,
it has the function of euphoria.

We don't have the dopamine
that other people have.

We don't have the pleasure
that other people have
in ordinary life.

But it's this...
this basic feeling

of I need to change
how I feel inside

that drives it,
and you can't get rid of that.
That's the way we're wired.

Dopamine governs
the reward system.

And if dopamine
isn't working right,

that'll make it hard
for the reward system
to work right.

What the brain imaging research
has shown

is that children's brains
respond differently to reward
when they have ADHD.

Medication allows there
to be more circulating
free dopamine.

By either blocking the
pumps that suck up the dopamine

in the ADHD brain
or by increasing production.

And what they saw was that
children who had been
taking medication

for their ADHD symptoms,

had better reward processing

than the children who had ADHD
and were not taking medication.

And this was true,

even though, they were not
on their medication
at the time of the brain scan.

We now have 35 studies

showing that
stimulant medications

used over several years of time
help the brain to become normal.

Help these areas of the brain
that are less developed,

less wired, less functional,
to literally grow.

Now, in no way am I saying
medication is the end all
and be all, no way.

Therapy, structure, coaching,
all of that very important.

The therapy that used to be
so effective,

has fallen by the wayside
with respect to this diagnosis.

So, family therapy works,
individual therapy works.

And, unfortunately,
those are being prescribed
less and less.

- You are getting your allowance.
- Mm-hmm.

So, you buying stuff
for your game?

I'm also saving up.
I'm saving up for a PC...

- Oh, yeah.
- ...and monitor.
- Yeah, you've told me that.

So, when I say we're going to do
everything without medication,

this is what we're going to...
this is what I'm talking about.

I want you to take a couple.
So, because... Smell that.

- Just bubble gum.
- Mm.

And so, when you write
with that, and when you erase,

it smells like bubble gum,
and it stimulates your dopamine.

Oh, I love the scent
of bubblegum.

So, you're gonna take
this one and practice.

- Okay.
- And I want you to write your...

Zara is currently not taking
any medication for ADHD.

I believe that we should exhaust
all other venues and options
and strategies

that are out there before we can
actually resort to medication.

That would be our last resort.

I personally feel
that it is always better

to be doing behavioral work
with a child teaching,
workarounds and coping tools,

at the same time
that you are using medication

because those things
will last forever.

Those are things
that a child can incorporate

and continue to use long after
they've stopped medication.

Heh, you're so silly.

And when I took Bear
off the Concerta,

he didn't have any medication
for maybe about a week or two.

And, um,
his teacher was very shocked

at how different he was
off the medication.

Is it opening? Here we go.

And she said it was a little bit
more difficult
to, uh, follow instructions

and I guess participate
in the class.

Okay.

I contacted the children's
psychiatrist department

to see if I could possibly, uh,
meet with a child psych

who can really help
with the medication management,

um, figuring out
the right medicine for him,

'cause my doctor that Bear
has been seeing
does not specialize in children.

So, I think that may have also
been a challenge
but they're full.

We have good treatments
to... to help people
all over the world.

And far too few people get them.

Far too few people
get the information they need.

Far too few people
have access to treatment.

Far too few people have access
to affordable treatment,

or can afford it, uh, for long
enough for it to be effective.

Good afternoon.
- Please get out your Pro/
- Con
Self-Driving Car article.

I would get to sit
on the hallway a lot.

Welcome, Rece!

Because I would do
certain things

that the teacher
would think would be bad.

All right, ladies and gentlemen,

you need your blue article
from last night and yesterday.

I would blur it out a lot.

A lot of times
it was from talking.

My butt was like imprinted
on the seat in the principal's
office as well. So...

Who says, no?
Rece, why did you say no?

Um, I said
because it's computer.

Somebody might be able
to hack into it

and drive you somewhere else
or like maybe drive you
off a cliff.

Drive you off a cliff?
You know I don't know, maybe.
Okay, so...

Elementary school
was definitely a challenge.

He would be outside
like the teacher forgot him
a few times outside.

So, he would be missing
instruction.

Right, missing
instructions and then
he'd be behind.

When evidently
there was comments being made

about, you know,
Rece is in the hall again.

The kids picked up on it,
they didn't want to be near him.

So, then they're bullying him.

And they would try
to get him in trouble.

They like, here, let's see Rece
the handle.

I was called all kinds of things

from idiot to class clown
to moron.

And you get used to that.

But a lot of times,

you will find, uh, most teachers
just don't have the patience
to deal with you.

And so, I spent a lot of time
in the hallway,

uh, just sitting,
listening to everybody learn,

um, which makes you start
to feel like you've, uh...

Well, you're not normal.

For kids with ADHD,

the impact
of the distractibility
and impulsivity is emotional.

It is the feeling that
they are different.

Like they're bad kids
with bad minds.

And that impact
on their self-esteem
has a huge emotional toll.

It is silent.

There's no sign that says,
"I have ADHD and right now
I can't concentrate. Help me!"

Like, I've one teacher
who I ain't gotta say any names.

I got in trouble for tapping
a pencil or stuff like that.

How many principal calls
did we get last year?

Oh, my God, sorry.

I... I'm tired
of apologizing for him.

Can I get a phone call
that says, "Hey, he had a
great day, today."

- We don't get those.
- We got one.

We did. We got a postcard.

I think one of the hardest
things with ADHD

is how every time they hear
"no" or "stop",

or you got to, you know,
whatever the issue is,

it holds away
at their self-esteem.

I mean, Rece says it,
he's so used to being in trouble

it doesn't really bother him
anymore.

You shouldn't be used to that.

Right?

I'm not trying to be
rude. I'm not trying to be mean.

I'm just trying to have fun,
try to make you laugh.

And... Yeah, it's all I can say.

One of the things I did in...
in school was, I called, uh,

through the Yellow Pages,
and I called
a construction company.

And I said... And I used my name
and everything

because I don't think
of the ramifications.

I'd like you to come over
and measure for an addition onto
the library,

and I'm at 3 o'clock
and I made this appointment.

I thought that was really funny.
I didn't have a friend
in the world.

I mean, it was fun because
when I was in math class,

I see this guy
out on the field measuring.

And then, I see the...
the vice principal go out

and ask him what he's doing.

Then I hear,
"Well, Howard Mandel,
please come to the office."

And I go to the office,
and he very sternly
looks down at me.

And he goes, "Did you hire
a contractor to put an addition
onto the library?"

And I just said, "Yes."

And he said, "Well, that...
You can't do that."

And I said,
"Wait, I'm getting...
I'm gonna get three bids."

He said, "Just sit down!
Just sit down!"

I sat down.
They called my parents.

I don't know what he expected
my parents to do.

We told them never
to hire construction firms.

And they asked me to leave
the school eventually,

and I was thrown out of...
I don't have a GED.
And that really was bothersome.

But my parents always laughed
where it was funny.

Always hugged me
when I needed it.

And, you know, that was enough.

That was really enough
to get me to where I am today.

I just felt
they were my safety net.

- Two.
- Three.

- Four.
- Five.

- Six.
- Seven.

- Eight.
- Nine.
- Ten.

- One.
- Two.

- Three.
- Four.

- Five.
- Six.

- Seven.
- Eight.

- Nine.
- Ten.
- Awesome.

Rece really loves
to make people happy
and to make them laugh.

- Shot.
- Elena!

- Stop making
everything...
- Shot! Go.

But he's so competitive.

- You know what?
- No, we have...
we have two.

I made two baskets.

- Yes.
- So, it's two-two.
Two-two.

- Yes, I did.
Stop cheating.
- Two-two.

You know he has
a very hard time...

- Go get it!
- ...distinguishing
between a place

where he should be competitive
and a place where he should
just be having fun.

- Next point wins.
- Yeah.

- No, you guys have
four right now.
- Next point wins.

No!

As a parent, the thing
that bothers me the most
are the friend issues.

Rylie, you're out.
Mekhela got you out.

Socially
in middle school
is a particular challenge.

And one of the challenges
with ADHD children

is they don't really get
the nuances of relationships

and so they tend to not have
a lot of friends.

- Winners rotate!
- No! You...

Do you need a partner?

Those with points just go onto
the next fence.

- We won but whatever.
- Ken, are you fine?

Come on, hon!

You guys cheated three times.

It has always been
a problem for me, my friends,

because I'll always come out
with a bad first impression.

She'd be like,
"Wow, he's really annoying
or something like that."

To see Rece struggle
getting along, you know,
it kind of breaks my heart

because I want him to...
I want him to have
good relationships.

I want him to have meaningful
friendships.

They can be obnoxious
without meaning to be.
So, the friend walks away.

They can think
they're being funny.

They can think
they're being enthusiastic.

When, in fact,
they're dominating,

they're butting in,
they're controlling.

You better not miss, Elena.
Oh, go get it. Go get it.

They're having it their
way, they're not cooperating
they're not empathizing,

simply because
they're oblivious to it.

But the number one thing
that kids with ADHD
are gonna have trouble with is,

schoolwork, plain and simple.

Guys, you're all gonna get
your journal, get your pencil,
get your calculator. Let's go.

Hi! Hello!

In most schools,
it's pretty lockstep
prescribed curriculum.

Memorize, repeat, hand back
to me what I told you to.

It's... it's deadening
for people with ADD.

We've moved to a
sort of industrial assembly line
approach to education.

And we fail to respect
the individuality
of our children

and where they are in this
ready... in this to learn.

And how much they know
or don't know,

and how much assistance
they might need
in acquiring that information.

The ADHD brain is
known to be a more creative,

more out of the box,
problem-solving, imaginative,
curious brain,

which doesn't always coincide
with a traditional
school setting.

You know, the teachers
kept on saying that,

"You know, it's hard
to handle him in the classroom.

"Always bouncing off the wall."

It was my teacher, Mr. Ray,
really encouraged me
to accept my hyperactivity,

accept my unique way
of looking at the world,
and creative problem solving.

I was always better
in school
when it was an activity, P.E.,

demonstrations,
I love that, geometry.

All zeros.

I didn't understand.

Why doesn't this picture
become clear to me?
Like, it does to other kids.

I remember
like it was yesterday.
Having the right intention,

wanting to do well
and just knowing it was
absolutely impossible.

I would literally
just miss entire days.

I would sleep in the back
of my car in the morning

and miss the first couple of...
of hours of school.

Eh, you know if I didn't like
the class, I just wouldn't go.

Kids with ADHD are much
more likely to miss classes.

They're much more likely
to be truant.

They're much more likely
to drop out of school.

They're much more likely
to fail academically.

Unfortunately, those
children tend to be segwayed
into other pathways,

special education,

before there's been
any real treatment.

Um, they might also end up,
unfortunately,
in the Juvenile Justice System.

This week I got suspended
from school
for some stuff that I did.

I was just kind of
messing around in class, um...

I got a call
from a police officer
Friday afternoon, 3:30.

What happened was that
he was walking down the hall
playing with a friend.

They were kind of pushing
each other, horse play.

And that kid like pushes
Hogan against the wall.

And, um, Hogan comes back,
and pushes him because it hurt.

And then that kid
just popped him in the face.

And Hogan is about
to start crying.

He's in the middle
of the hallway.
And he's embarrassed.

Like, his thought is, I'm gonna
go to the bathroom and cool off,

and then I'm going to go
to class.

But the teacher says,
"No, you can't go."

He keeps walking
in with his head down.
And then she blocks the door.

Yeah, kind of holds that
with her hand
and he just keeps going.

- Kept walking through.
- Yeah. Right.

- Um, and she pressed charges
on him.
- Mm-hmm.

He certainly didn't want
anyone to get hurt,
wasn't trying to push an adult.

I think for him,
it was more just like,
"How did this happen?

"I got punched in the face.

"The next thing I know,
I'm in Juvenile Detention."

A person at
the Juvenile Detention Center
comes out and says,

he'll be here all weekend.

I'm thinking like a kid
who's only spent the night
at his grandparents' house,

our house, a hotel or two
and now he's here.

Just unbelievable.

And you're going,
"Gosh, is this...
is this the first time

"or is this the last time?"

That's what's worrisome
because once you get
into that system,

you never get the benefit
of the doubt
from that point forward.

Whether he did it or not...

he still gets a placement
outside of school.

So, he goes
to the alternative school,

because he's got a
"pending charge".

So, now we're taking him
out of this school,

to this alternative school,
which is just...

- Oh, it's like a mini prison.
- It's a mini... It is a prison.
Like it's a mini prison.

So, he's going there
every day.

- And I think in our
perspective...
- Mm-hmm.

- ...I always felt like
they're just trying to punish...
- Mm-hmm.

- ...punish the ADHD child.
- Yeah, punish it out of it.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

If we just punish him enough,

- he will eventually stop
or we can send him away.
- Mm-hmm.

It's really hard at school

because you can't like talk
at all there unless you like
have permission to.

So, since I talk a lot,
it's really hard for me
to focus on that.

And I have to do like
a lot of things.

I'm getting ready to do
that I don't really want to do,

but I kind of have to do,
like, clipping my nails

or cutting my hair
to a certain length

and keeping it out
of my eyes all day.

And the fact that
if I don't do these things,
I get punished for it.

It just doesn't feel right.

I can see there's such fine line
where he could just
fall on either side.

Like, gosh, that's not
what you want for your kid.

You don't want them
in trouble with the law
or in and out of prison.

But, um...

- that... that's my biggest fear
for him.
- Mm-hmm.

- That he won't make it.
- Yeah.

I remember this guy
I was hanging around with.

He said, "Let's go,
rob this lady's house."

And I went with him to rob
the person's house.

Now if we got caught,
how much trouble
will I've gotten in?

But I didn't have
the inhibitors to say,

"Well, yes, it's not a bad idea.
Let's go rob the house."

You just... In the moment,
you just don't think about
consequence.

The fact that 25%
of prison populations
are saying they have ADHD

it's because we fail
as a society
on many, many levels

to treat or provide support.

Particularly for, uh,
communities that are
the most under-resourced

and thus end up only really
discovering their ADHD

once they're already
incarcerated,

and that's an absolute tragedy
for our country.

The stakes are really,
really high for Zara,

going into this new school
for middle school.

They taste super good.

- They taste better
than they smell.
- Oh, really?

The way we ended sixth grade
was very rough on Zara.

We all needed a break
from school.

- What time is it?
- It's quarter to nine.

And now she is ready
to go back seventh grade,
middle school.

Day two comes and I get a call
from her mother,
which is the 21st.

And mother... mom is very upset.
Savera is very upset.

And she says she just received
a call from the school,

keep in mind, this is day two
at 8:30 in the morning,

that Zara had impulsively
said something

on the little tram bus
on the way to school

that the bus driver overheard
and brought to
the administrator's attention.

- Hi!
- How's it going?

- I'm good. How are you?
- I haven't seen you
since school started.

- Yeah. It's been such a...
- So, you know, we got quite
a lot to talk about.

What happened on day two,
I know something happened

- that we need to talk about.
- Yeah.

I remember I was on the bus.

I was there
with a few of my friends.

Everything was going well

and then everyone was sharing
stories of their experiences,

their life, their summer,
things like that.

And then I made up this lie
just to have a story to tell,

and it was involving, you know,
me taking this course online,

and lying about my age,
and meeting these random people
at Starbucks.

Zara told her new three friends,
that she just met yesterday,

that she was meeting someone
after school at Starbucks
who doesn't know she's 13.

What was your plan with
why you were making that up?

Was your plan to make them think
you were cool?

It was attention-seeking
behavior.
Just to have a story to tell.

- To have a story to tell?
- Yeah. Yeah.

- So, they would think,
you were cool?
- Right.

I... I didn't know
what to do. I... I was upset.

And I... I think I just, uh,
kind of lost it there.

I was like, "Oh, no,
it's just second day
of school.

And maybe this is just going to
kind of lay the foundations
of her entire year ahead."

And, uh, she just kind of
messed it up for herself.

I knew it was wrong,
but thinking that,

"Oh, I could be
getting attention

- "and I can have everyone
laughing" replaced that.
- Okay.

I decided to...

As a mother,
I know when to forgive
and let go and move on.

But if it becomes day in-day out

and you feel like the child
is just not learning
from their mistakes,

then, uh... then, yes, that's
become a little problematic
for me, personally.

Zara will say anything
and you never know
what's going to come out.

But I want her to get
the confidence in herself

to know that she is okay
and that she is enough.

What I see now is
there's no way except to push
Hogan through the school system.

There's no alternatives.

If he could apprentice
with somebody,
if he had a mentor,

if he could do an on-the-job
training now,
I think he'd be successful.

Which is the new screen
and which is the old?

- This the old one.
- That's the old one.

You're taking off
the crystal ball.

I just need the home button.

Because he has a lot of
skills that in life are great,

like, to ask questions,
to be argumentative,
to push boundaries.

Those are all
really great things.

That is not what teachers want
in the classroom though.

That's seen as disrespectful
and non-compliant.

Oh, yeah.

We always would
call him Mowgli,

- like, the jungle boy.
- Yes.

Because he...
When he goes outside or when
we would go with camping,

it was like,
he was in his native land.

All right. I caught a cat fish.
I'm gonna let it go.

And I always think,
"Gosh, if he had been
a hunter or a gatherer,

like, ADHD wouldn't
have even...

"It would have been a good thing
to have what he has."

Don't hurt me,
I'm trying to help you.

I mean, I might look
at a stream and think,

I wonder, if I could catch
those fish with my hands.

I'm gonna walk out there
and do it.

- He does.
- Mm-hmm.

Just grab them
with his bare hands.

Here he is.

It's that kind of
non-filter "That looks cool.
I'm gonna do it."

That can get you
in a ton of trouble.

But then it can also put you
in positions

where you kind of do
these really cool thing. So...

- Can you fix my collar?
- Mm-hmm.

I see myself as maybe
doing some kind of engineering
job or like business owner.

Like, one day I could manage
that and I could really try,

and I feel like I could do
really good things.

Try to get around you.
It's the easiest thing ever.

The diagnosis was
permission to be the things
that I am.

And not call them flawed
but call them what they are,

and understand that some of them
need to be managed.

And some of them
need to be accelerated.

The diagnosis has also
just made me a better human
to my child.

I can relate as long
as I take two seconds to look...

look at what the kid version
versus the adult version
looks like.

All right. Let's have a seat.
Let's see.

Keep her perch.

Keep her...
Did we bring a bucket?

- Did we bring a bucket?
- No, it's fine. It's fine.

- We can just keep...
- Oh, my, God, Nicholas,
I knew that might be the...

And I also... I look at
him with this intense hope.

- Hi!
- How are you?

- I'm good. How are you?
- I'm great.

- How is the school you're going?
- Good.

I realized that
if I wanted things to change,
I had to follow a routine.

And I've started taking
more initiative of my life

and because of that
everything else improved.

So, I think, Zara,
I think this is your pile
mostly. I did your laundry.

Prior to finding out
about her ADHD,

I don't think we... we really
had the kind of mother-daughter
relationship that I wanted.

Yeah. I always misconstrued
her actions.

I thought she was trying
to provoke me at one point

that she just enjoyed
getting a reaction out of me.

- Look at you.
- You guys can sit there,
okay?

So, you can bring up
the wood from there.

I think we, uh, sometimes
were judgmental,

instead of trying to
understand...

Smile.

Do you have regrets
about how you handled?

Yes.

My regrets are that
I... I scolded her.

I, uh, yelled at her.

Shouted at her and, um...

and said mean things to her
that I shouldn't have.

Oh, let's go. Oh, oh, oh.

Had I known this earlier on,
I could have handled things
very differently.

Come here, come here. Fetch.

Tell me, how things
are going with mom.

How's that relationship going?

That is going actually
really well.

I definitely feel the diagnosis
helped her understand me

and why I do what I do
much better than before.

And it's also improved
our relationship.

Wow, well,
that is really powerful.

I, as a parent,
have unconditional love
for my daughter.

And what I learned was
try to show it more often,

to make sure she knows
that I'm here to support her,

help her,
and make things easier for her.

And that has changed
our relationship, too.

She's able to share more
with me now.

Through this whole learning
I've always told Zara,
we're in this together.

She's learning, I'm learning.

I have seen a great deal
of resilience in her, too,

how she handles it so strongly,
so bravely,
so courageously at her age.

Zara has made me
a better person
and a better parent.

I truly do believe
that no matter what

my kid Zara is going to be
exceptional

because she...
she has a good heart.
She's extremely smart.

Just these...
these social things

and she's gonna
figure them out, right?
Like it's part of growing up.

You learn and she will,
and she's going
to do amazing things.

I have no doubt.

So, right now school
has been going pretty well.

I've started to...

Brace yourselves,

I have started
to make friends now. Whoa!

Whoo!

Oh! Watch it.

Yeah!

I kind of like the way I am

because I'm not like
every other kid

and I like being different.

- Come on, Rece.
- Come on, Rece.

I've never really thought
of ADHD as something
that could hold me back.

- Come on, Rece. Bam.
- Oh, yeah.

With maturity, and with,

I think some positive
role models,
as he gets older.

I think he's just gonna...

I mean, it's endless
where he can go.

But he has to keep
working at it.

You know,
it's not gonna come easy.

Who did you play with
at recess today?

Oh.

First, I played with Lucas,
then I played with Adrian.

- You did?
- Uh-huh.

- Oh, good.
- I played with balls.

Good. That's good.

I spoke to the doctor again.
She told me about Focalin.

It was very stressful
trying to figure out
the medication.

And I just felt so bad that
I have to keep trying these
different medications on him

and I still wasn't quite sure
of how he was feeling.

Look!

What?

They are cooking.

This medication has been
working awesome.

He does very well with the...
He's still himself.
He's just more focused.

- Is that what
you are trying to do?
- No.

- You're trying turn me
into a cartoon?
- No.

- Are you sure?
- No. I am.

Bear loves his
new school.

He loves his teacher.
He loves the kids in the class.
He's doing very well.

I get nothing but praises
from the principal,

who says she wants to clone him
and have more Bears,

which, you know,
at his last school is like
the complete opposite.

- I see you.

- Hey, how much
you wanna bet?

Taco.

We have an opportunity
to understand that
this is a hardwired issue.

And like any other
medical issue,

there are treatments
that can help.

But that there are
special strengths

that exist in those people
with ADHD.

And we have, I think, a duty
and a responsibility
to acknowledge that,

to encourage that,

and to make them able
to use and flourish
those particular strengths.

Not only for themselves
and their lives,
but for society as a whole.

If the world could
understand, if the teachers and
the tutors, and the babysitters,

and the parents, and school bus
drivers could understand,

this child has these challenge
and this strength.

So, here's how
you can help them.

We found that by
recognizing the strengths
in our patients of any age,

they felt a whole lot better.

But fueling the strengths,
you crowd out the weaknesses.

And... and they find ways
of dealing being on time,

of getting organized
because they're motivated.
They want to unwrap their gift.

Hey.

You have to give people hope.

And I think that if they can
pursue things that they love,

and everyone has things
that they love...

they are going
to have a happier life.

The way forward for me
for families with ADHD

is to don't lose sight
of the relationship.

Stop longing for the child
you thought you wanted
when you were pregnant.

And accept the child you have...

take it as your mission,
as your shepherd,

to help them develop
those talents, right?

And focus on your relationship
with them over everything else.

Because that's what's going to
sustain them and sustain you.

My parents were always
really strong and behind me

and I think they... they knew
that it came in a rough
and tumble package.

My mom really sat down with me
and poured into me
when I struggled.

On the days I didn't want
to do my schoolwork,

she will sit there and like,
"Hey, Michelle,
we have to get this done."

I'd always be sitting
in the kitchen table

and my mom would come in
and she'd say,

"Look, you know, you...
you've got to do
two things in life.

"You got to work
hard and you got to make sure
your spirit never gets broken."

And I think that, like,
the phrase "Your spirit
will never get broken"

is the only reason I made it
through childhood.

Focus less on the way
in which they get to their goals

and more on nurturing them
as they go along that journey.

It's not easy.

And don't get the idea
that if you just take
a few pills,

that all of a sudden
everything's going to be fixed
and wonderful.

But the fact is you've got
some impressive strengths.

This is amazing.

They're just
really misunderstood;
and it breaks my heart.

Because I know that they receive
such negative feedback
from their world.

And I think,
if I could pick one thing

that I would want
parents, educators, and
the general public

to know about children
with ADHD is that

they're little creative,
imaginative beings

who just need
a little more support,
a little more positive feedback,

to kind of put them
on the right track.

Your child doesn't have to be
the next Einstein,

or the next, you know,
incredible CEO, to be a success,

but simply to help your child
to feel good about what
the strengths that they do have,

to shore up the weaknesses
that they do have,

and to be the best version
of themselves they can be.

All right. Good job.

I am super excited
for his future,

like, it's to a point
where I kinda...

I don't want him
to grow too quickly

but I kind of do
because I just can't wait to see
where he's gonna go.

Because he's always talked
about being an astronaut.

Mars, Earth, Venus, Mercury,
Moon, and Sun.

I just wondered like,
"Will he actually be
an astronaut?"

Hey, Bear.

So, it sounds like,
I was a kid just like you
when I was growing up.

Um, I struggled in school.
I couldn't pay attention.

I couldn't really sit still
very well.

But you know what?

I, eventually, after many,
many years found inspiration.

And never forget,
you can do absolutely anything,

if you work hard enough,
and never, ever give up.

- Where are you going?
You are going to the Moon?
- Yes.

All the systems are there
just... just to create order
and normality.

But all the greatness is when
people break outside
the systems like, period.

So, to speak, you know,
celebrate that you're
outside the system.

I want to tell parents
who have kids with ADHD

that it's okay, that your child
is going to make it.

They're not less than,
actually, they're better than.

I attribute my success
in business to my ADD.

There's no question in my mind.

But it's been a tradeoff,
you know,

because, like I said,
they've been times

where you just want to cry
from the frustration.

When I found out a lot
of geniuses have ADHD,

I went, "Ah, there you go.
I'm a genius."

The gift is that you can see
something that others can't see.

You know, sometimes you feel
like you can see around walls.

You know, that's something
that is a gift.

When you feel good
about yourself you can achieve
anything you want.

And let's instill that
in every, every family,

every person, every... every kid
who's watching this right now.

If I didn't have
this ADHD brain,
I wouldn't be where I am today.

And I'm pretty happy
with where I am today.

I don't think I would have
been as good at the creative
side of my job without the ADHD

because I think sometimes
your brain is not afraid to just
let those crazy ideas come in.

Because there's so many coming

that, um, you find one that you
think is going to work best
but you execute it.

There's nothing wrong with you.

Your brain is beautiful.

Your society didn't do
a good job telling you
that you're creative.

Society didn't tell...
do a good job
telling you that you have,

you know, the ability to focus
on many things at once.

You're freaking awesome.

You know, I said
if I can take a magic pill

and cure myself of it
I would never do it.

Never in a million years.

If I could rename ADHD,

I would call it "Howie."

And I think that everybody
should rename it

with their own names
because that's what makes us us.

So my ADHD is Howie.

What's your name?