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Robot chicken 25
Federated resources
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[drill]
>> it's alive!
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[drill]
>> it's alive!
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[captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group]
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>> this is how I dance when
I'm not wearing underpants.
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Nothing I like more than to
Dance, and I'm not gonna wear no
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Pants.
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You can't make me--
>> j.K. Rowling.
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>> cor blimey, are you an angel?
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>> I am from the future.
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In 15 years' time, you will be a
Best-selling children's book
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Author whose net worth is more
Than one billion american
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Dollars.
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>> I had an idea about a boy
Wizard.
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>> no.
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Your books will be about a
Magical raccoon.
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He has an afro.
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His name is squiggles and he
Shoots pixie dust out of his
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Bunghole.
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>> thank you.
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I'll start right away.
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>> heh heh.
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>> ok, little girl, pick any pet
You'd like.
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>> thanks.
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What are you doing in here,
Mr. Kitty cat?
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>> a space time vortex opened up
On my home planet thundera, and
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I suddenly found myself on earth
Where cats apparently don't
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Share the same rights as humans.
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>> you're so cute.
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I choose you.
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I can't wait for show and tell.
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>> ha ha ha!
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♪ vicky has cooties
Vicky has cooties ♪
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>> hee hee hee!
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Stop it, billy.
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>> vicky does not have cooties.
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Anyone else?
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Huh? Anyone else?
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Come on, I got 9 lives and a
Whole can of whoopass.
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>> bad!
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Bad mr. Kitty cat!
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>> fine, fine.
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I overreacted.
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Sorry, everybody.
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Sorry, that one's on me.
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Please stop that.
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>> this is my new pet.
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His name is mr. Kitty cat, and I
Got him at the pound.
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>> actually, my name is lion-o,
Leader of the thundercats.
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I'm the chosen one.
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>> lame.
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>> arrrrgghhh!
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Aw, come on, vicky.
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Aren't we still friends?
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Huh?
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B.F.F.
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>> no.
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>> aw! Oh!
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Vicky!
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>> go to hell!
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>> don't worry, lion-o.
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We'll find you a home.
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>> miss prissy pants, stop
Fussing with your bow.
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>> this bow sucks.
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And my name is lion-o, leader of
The thundercats, sworn to--
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>> see?
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Grouchy kitties don't get any
Tuna.
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>> I better get some frickin'
Tuna.
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>> yes?
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>> because your wife was a
Bitch?
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>> because she was a bitch.
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Yes.
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>> there you go.
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One shaved head.
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>> great.
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Let's make the carpet match the
Drapes.
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>> margaret. Sarah.
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00:03:03,182 --> 00:03:04,517
>> a pony! A pony!
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>> yay! A pony!
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>> only one of you gets the
Pony.
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The other one gets a whipping.
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>> now let's see those report
Cards.
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>> the british are coming!
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The british are coming!
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Hey, a shortcut.
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Uhh!
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Ahh!
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>> here, clifford!
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Here, boy!
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Aah!
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No, clifford, no!
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Bad dog, clifford!
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Bad dog!
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[sobbing]
Oh, clifford.
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00:03:40,587 --> 00:03:42,722
>> um, you know I've never done
A neutering before?
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>> just do your best.
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>> now live from the shady acres
Nursing home, the legendary evel
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Knievel's greatest stunt ever
Only on pay-per-view.
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[drumroll]
>> uhh!
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[drumroll]
>> uhh!
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[thunder]
>> it's moses.
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He's back.
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>> god has blessed me with 10
Irrefutable commandments for
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Living.
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>> is there anything on there
About not pushing your religion
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On other people?
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00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:24,764
>> no.
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00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:25,999
>> didn't think so.
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>> number one.
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He who smelt it dealt it.
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[laughter]
What's so funny?
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Stop it.
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Stop laughing.
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>> ha ha ha!
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>> ♪ bork, bork, bork, bork ♪
Hey, bjork, bjork.
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♪ bjork, bjork, bjork
Bjork, bjork, bjork, bjork ♪
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Hey, mork.
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Nanoo.
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♪ bork, bork, bork ♪
Hey, dork.
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Ha ha!
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Dork. Dork.
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New york. New york.
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♪ york, york ♪
[gasp]
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Quark!
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Oh, quark!
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Quark! Quark!
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Tour?
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♪ tour, tour, tour, tour ♪
Zork. Zork.
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Zork, zork.
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00:05:06,005 --> 00:05:08,274
♪ zork, zork, zork ♪
Hey, pork.
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00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:11,844
♪ pork, pork, pork, pork, pork ♪
A fork?
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Where the fork?
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Need a fork, fork.
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Fork, fork.
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Hey, there is spork.
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Spork, spork.
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♪ spork, spork, spork, spork ♪
There the orc!
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Orc!
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00:05:22,722 --> 00:05:23,656
Bork! Bork!
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00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:24,957
>> oh, what kept you, honey?
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Dinner's waiting.
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>> get the hell off my back,
Woman!
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Can I get a moment of [beep]
Peace?
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Ahh!
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[glass breaks]
>> oh, yeah.
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00:05:32,865 --> 00:05:33,633
Now just like that.
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00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,868
Now spank me and call me daddy.
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>> un dusseldorfer mein kampf!
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>> sieg heil!
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>> [speaking broken german]
[water splashing]
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[farting]
>> oh! Ahh!
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>> bah!
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>> achtung!
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Achtung!
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Hello?
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>> heh heh heh.
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Douche.
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00:06:02,962 --> 00:06:05,932
>> I, uh--I walked into a door.
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00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:09,736
>> well, then, can I interest
You in our line of nerf doors?
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00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:10,636
>> what about stairs?
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She's gonna need some nerf
Stairs, too.
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[alarm beeping]
>> [yawn]
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Good morning.
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What are we gonna do today,
Corey feldman?
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>> same thing we do every day,
Corey haim.
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We save the world.
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♪ da da nah nah nah
Da da da da... ♪
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>> [imitating guitar]
>> let's go start the day.
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>> yeah!
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[cricket chirping]
>> this just in.
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President bush's daughters are
Missing in action after the
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Helicopter carrying them to a
U.S.O. Tour event crashed in
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The brazilian rain forest.
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The military released the
Following videotape just prior
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To the crash.
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>> whoo-hoo!
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It is a party!
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Aah-ooh!
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00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:03,556
>> my dad's the president.
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00:07:03,623 --> 00:07:04,357
>> miss bush, please!
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I can't--not yet!
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00:07:05,591 --> 00:07:07,827
Oh, look out!
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00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:10,029
>> two presidential daughters.
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That's one for each of us.
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>> feld-dog, let's roll.
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Coordinates are locked in.
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>> let's punch it.
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Whoo!
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Yeah!
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00:07:26,813 --> 00:07:28,748
>> let's go, go, go, go!
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00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:30,116
Oh, this is tight!
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00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:31,484
This is tight!
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00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:33,719
And that's what would it be like
If we had the corey van and the
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00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:37,490
Corey jet.
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00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:38,257
Listen to me.
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00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:39,959
We should have corey rocket
Packs.
197
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:41,561
>> hey, corey, I got an idea for
You.
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00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:48,501
How about a nice, tall glass of
Shut the [beep] Up?
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00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:49,569
Hey, barkeep.
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00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:50,903
Nice frosty cola right here.
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00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,171
>> two straws, please.
202
00:07:52,238 --> 00:07:54,907
>> we don't serve your kind
Here.
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00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:55,842
>> our kind?
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00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:57,476
You mean americans?
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00:07:57,543 --> 00:08:00,847
>> no, I mean anyone who's ever
Been on the cover of a teen
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00:08:00,913 --> 00:08:08,054
Magazine like "Buff," "Tiger
Beat," "Teen beat," "Cosmo
207
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:11,057
Girl," "J-14"...
208
00:08:11,123 --> 00:08:11,991
>> ha ha.
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00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:14,393
Boy, did you guys pick the wrong
Two coreys.
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00:08:14,460 --> 00:08:15,494
Hey, hey, hey, guys.
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00:08:15,561 --> 00:08:16,696
Listen.
212
00:08:16,762 --> 00:08:18,798
We don't want any trouble, and I
Don't think you do, either,
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00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:20,032
So...
214
00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:22,668
>> to the contrary, trouble is
What you now have because we are
215
00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:24,070
Giving it to you.
216
00:08:24,136 --> 00:08:26,138
>> "Orientation of sexual"...
217
00:08:26,205 --> 00:08:27,306
>> wait!
218
00:08:27,373 --> 00:08:28,407
Wait.
219
00:08:28,474 --> 00:08:29,308
Heh heh heh.
220
00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:35,313
Just wait.
221
00:08:35,381 --> 00:08:37,283
Now we're gonna tear it up.
222
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:44,957
>> yeah, lost boys style.
223
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:46,292
>> aah!
224
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,927
My ear!
225
00:08:47,994 --> 00:08:50,897
>> hey! That was--ow!
226
00:08:50,963 --> 00:08:52,832
Hey, don't--ow!
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00:08:52,899 --> 00:09:03,876
>> aah!
228
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:04,877
>> wow.
229
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:08,047
Thanks for helping us, douche--
Uh, screech.
230
00:09:08,114 --> 00:09:11,250
>> the location of the bush
Daughters is here, and now I
231
00:09:11,317 --> 00:09:13,853
Must return to my muay thai
Kickbox training.
232
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:15,021
>> why would you help us?
233
00:09:15,087 --> 00:09:18,324
>> because I, too, am a former
Teen idol.
234
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,425
>> uh, no.
235
00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:21,494
Actually, you were more like a
Second third banana on a
236
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:25,464
B-rated kids' show, but hey,
Whatever you say.
237
00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,133
>> what the hell is this place?
238
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:28,200
Is this the place?
239
00:09:28,267 --> 00:09:29,402
Could this be the place?
240
00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:31,404
I'm going in either way, so...
241
00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:39,812
>> love shack, baby!
242
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,180
>> yo!
243
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:42,581
Presidential babes.
244
00:09:42,648 --> 00:09:43,582
>> we're here to rescue you.
245
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:44,750
>> rescue us?
246
00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:46,385
You can go straight to hell!
247
00:09:46,452 --> 00:09:48,554
>> yeah, we're finally free!
248
00:09:48,621 --> 00:09:50,056
Free to party!
249
00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:54,327
>> whoo!
250
00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:56,095
>> we're never going home.
251
00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:57,596
Whoo-hoo!
252
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,999
>> look, feld-dog, if we can't
Bring them home, we can't be
253
00:10:00,066 --> 00:10:01,200
Heroes.
254
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,236
>> well, haim, looks like we've
Got to rely on our one true
255
00:10:04,303 --> 00:10:05,404
Skill.
256
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:06,772
>> wait, you're not talking
About the thing we do with our
257
00:10:06,839 --> 00:10:07,540
Taints, right?
258
00:10:07,606 --> 00:10:08,374
Are you?
259
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,344
>> no, corey--acting.
260
00:10:11,410 --> 00:10:13,612
>> even though corey haim and
Corey feldman couldn't be here
261
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:16,382
Today, I want to thank them for
Bringing my precious daughters
262
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,818
Home.
263
00:10:18,884 --> 00:10:22,355
I hereby declare that anyone who
Hates the coreys also hates
264
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:23,089
America.
265
00:10:23,155 --> 00:10:24,156
>> hey, feld-dog, feld-dog.
266
00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:26,325
What happens if they find the
Real bush twins, man?
267
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:28,361
>> fat chance.
268
00:10:28,427 --> 00:10:29,795
>> dad? Ow!
269
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:32,865
>> damn you to hell, corey haim
And corey feldman.
270
00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:34,700
>> my dad's the president.
271
00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:39,672
I'm gonna get you buried in oil
And then I'm gonna have my daddy
272
00:10:39,739 --> 00:10:41,073
Invade you!
273
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:42,575
>> my dad will get you hurt.
274
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:44,610
Yeah, how'd you like to have
Your ass kicked by
275
00:10:44,677 --> 00:10:47,013
Halli-b-burton or halliblurton?
276
00:10:47,079 --> 00:10:48,214
>> ha ha ha!
277
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,484
Think, jenna, we're like old
Apples tied up to a sack of
278
00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:52,485
[beep].
279
00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:53,486
>> it's dark.
280
00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:55,221
>> all right, all right.
281
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:58,057
I got to go to the bathroom.
282
00:10:58,124 --> 00:10:59,592
>> eat my air!
283
00:10:59,658 --> 00:11:00,826
Ha ha ha!
284
00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:07,233
>> look at me go!
285
00:11:07,299 --> 00:11:09,268
[captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group]
286
00:11:09,335 --> 00:11:11,270
[captioned by the national
Captioning institute
287
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:12,338
--www.Ncicap.Org--]
18683
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