Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,070 --> 00:00:08,842
[captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group]
2
00:00:08,908 --> 00:00:18,885
[drill]
>> it's alive!
3
00:00:18,952 --> 00:00:28,661
[drill]
>> it's alive!
4
00:00:28,728 --> 00:00:39,472
[maniacal laughing]
>> extra! Extra!
5
00:00:39,539 --> 00:00:42,375
Newspaper boys are anachronisms
In modern-day society!
6
00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:43,843
Read all about it!
7
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:46,746
>> dude, I heard that some kid
Ate some pop rocks and drank
8
00:00:46,813 --> 00:00:50,617
Some soda and his stomach
Exploded and he died, dude!
9
00:00:50,683 --> 00:00:52,285
[laughing]
>> no way.
10
00:00:52,352 --> 00:00:53,119
That never happened.
11
00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:54,020
>> I dare you to do it.
12
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:54,888
>> no way.
13
00:00:54,954 --> 00:00:55,989
Let's make mikey do it.
14
00:00:56,055 --> 00:00:57,190
He'll try anything.
15
00:00:57,257 --> 00:01:05,965
>> I'll bet you a dollar he
Doesn't.
16
00:01:06,032 --> 00:01:07,967
[burps]
>> lame!
17
00:01:08,034 --> 00:01:08,902
Ha ha ha!
18
00:01:08,968 --> 00:01:09,936
I knew nothing would happen.
19
00:01:10,003 --> 00:01:11,004
>> ugh!
20
00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:12,305
>> he's gonna explode!
21
00:01:12,372 --> 00:01:14,474
[burps]
[farts]
22
00:01:14,541 --> 00:01:15,508
>> guys?
23
00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:18,077
Uh...Guys?
24
00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:20,580
Guys?
25
00:01:20,646 --> 00:01:26,652
[farting]
>> mommy, mommy, that boy out
26
00:01:26,719 --> 00:01:28,955
There is running faster than
The train!
27
00:01:29,021 --> 00:01:31,157
>> what did I tell you about
Being stupid?
28
00:01:31,224 --> 00:01:33,426
You don't get a birthday this
Year.
29
00:01:33,493 --> 00:01:43,803
[farting, screaming]
>> we gotta cap that fire!
30
00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:44,904
>> whoo!
31
00:01:44,971 --> 00:01:46,239
Thanks, mister.
32
00:01:46,306 --> 00:01:51,211
[rumbling]
>> oh, my god!
33
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:56,816
>> mikey!
34
00:01:56,883 --> 00:02:01,621
>> ♪ la la la la la la la ♪
[cracking]
35
00:02:01,688 --> 00:02:05,758
Ugh!
36
00:02:05,825 --> 00:02:06,893
>> are we patched in?
37
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:07,760
Over.
38
00:02:07,827 --> 00:02:08,728
>> you are a go.
39
00:02:08,794 --> 00:02:10,396
Over.
40
00:02:10,463 --> 00:02:11,998
>> domino's pizza.
41
00:02:12,065 --> 00:02:13,500
>> um, yeah, hello.
42
00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:15,735
I'd like one meat lover's pizza
To be delivered.
43
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:16,870
>> no problem.
44
00:02:16,936 --> 00:02:19,172
If it isn't there in 30 minutes,
It's free.
45
00:02:19,239 --> 00:02:20,540
Let me get the address.
46
00:02:20,607 --> 00:02:24,477
>> yeah, try 1414, "We're in
Orbit around the [bleep] Planet"
47
00:02:24,544 --> 00:02:28,615
Avenue, 'cause we're on the
Space station, jerk-wad!
48
00:02:28,681 --> 00:02:32,652
[laughing]
>> that's 23,203 free pizzas so
49
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:33,753
Far!
50
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:36,089
>> sir, sir, we're all out of
Twisty bread.
51
00:02:36,155 --> 00:02:38,324
>> let's call them again!
52
00:02:38,391 --> 00:02:41,895
>> sir, who are we going to
Conquer today?
53
00:02:41,961 --> 00:02:43,530
>> whoever I feel like
Conquering.
54
00:02:43,596 --> 00:02:46,432
Gosh!
55
00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:47,667
>> I think europe is weak.
56
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:48,801
I don't know.
57
00:02:48,868 --> 00:02:50,236
We can attack them or something.
58
00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:52,204
You can be emperor maybe.
59
00:02:52,272 --> 00:02:53,773
As long as I have my mule.
60
00:02:53,840 --> 00:03:00,246
>> sweet!
61
00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:01,948
>> sir, we're outnumbered.
62
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:04,417
>> I was outnumbered by ninjas
And wolverines over summer
63
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:06,853
Break, but I killed them all
With my nunchucks.
64
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,421
Gosh!
65
00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:09,656
Idiots.
66
00:03:09,722 --> 00:03:11,691
>> napoleon bonamite, you are
Hereby sentenced to live out the
67
00:03:11,758 --> 00:03:17,497
Rest of your days in exile!
68
00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:18,865
>> sweet!
69
00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:28,908
[disco music playing]
[music stops]
70
00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:42,889
[disco music playing]
[music stops]
71
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:46,793
>> my darling mrs. Fluffy
Bottom, ours is a love than can
72
00:03:46,859 --> 00:03:48,094
Never be.
73
00:03:48,161 --> 00:03:49,162
>> meow.
74
00:03:49,228 --> 00:03:52,599
>> everything floats down here!
75
00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:55,735
That is, if its mass per unit
Of volume is equal to or
76
00:03:55,802 --> 00:03:57,637
Lighter than that of water.
77
00:03:57,704 --> 00:04:02,508
>> coming this fall to bravo,
Get ready for...
78
00:04:02,575 --> 00:04:06,446
"Ass-pirates of the caribbean!"
>> argh!
79
00:04:06,512 --> 00:04:08,982
I love being a naughty pirate!
80
00:04:09,048 --> 00:04:10,817
>> ooh ho, argh!
81
00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:11,884
>> bravo!
82
00:04:11,951 --> 00:04:15,755
Somewhere along the line, we got
Really, really gay!
83
00:04:15,822 --> 00:04:16,856
>> you see tiffany yet?
84
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,757
She hit puberty during summer
Break.
85
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:19,692
>> you serious?
86
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,226
Oh, man, I can't wait!
87
00:04:21,293 --> 00:04:22,495
Puberty rules!
88
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:23,262
Oh, shh shh.
89
00:04:23,329 --> 00:04:24,564
There she is.
90
00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:25,832
>> well, hello, boys.
91
00:04:25,898 --> 00:04:26,933
>> uh, hey, tiffany.
92
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:27,734
>> yeah, what's up, tiffany?
93
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,035
Good summer?
94
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,436
>> her boobs are huge now!
95
00:04:30,503 --> 00:04:31,237
>> awesome!
96
00:04:31,304 --> 00:04:33,873
I want to squeeze 'em!
97
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:34,707
>> hey!
98
00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:38,277
[laughing]
Don't!
99
00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:39,479
That's sand.
100
00:04:39,545 --> 00:04:42,115
You better stop that.
101
00:04:42,181 --> 00:04:43,249
>> I ruined your ice cream!
102
00:04:43,316 --> 00:04:44,317
It's my day!
103
00:04:44,384 --> 00:04:46,552
>> hey, stop!
104
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:48,688
Hey, now, stop.
105
00:04:48,755 --> 00:04:53,126
[laughing]
>> ah, choke on it!
106
00:04:53,192 --> 00:04:54,060
Ha ha!
107
00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,962
Nerd!
108
00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:58,898
[groaning]
>> you gonna take that, boy?
109
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:00,133
>> wow!
110
00:05:00,199 --> 00:05:03,836
It's red-headed african-american
Baseball great barry mcguire!
111
00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:04,704
>> yes.
112
00:05:04,771 --> 00:05:07,340
I'm very amazing, and you're a
Nerd.
113
00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:09,642
But if I train you, you won't
Have to put up with bullies no
114
00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:10,710
More.
115
00:05:10,777 --> 00:05:13,479
And by "Train," I mean inject
You with this:
116
00:05:13,546 --> 00:05:16,783
Barry mcguire's super happy
Fun-time anger go-go juice.
117
00:05:16,849 --> 00:05:21,988
[groaning]
[growling]
118
00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:24,090
>> shazam!
119
00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:27,393
>> ...And he was all, "Please,
Mister, that sand hurts."
120
00:05:27,460 --> 00:05:28,361
>> yeah, yeah?
121
00:05:28,428 --> 00:05:29,395
And then?
122
00:05:29,462 --> 00:05:30,329
>> I kicked some more.
123
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:31,264
>> ha ha!
124
00:05:31,330 --> 00:05:33,533
You are a [bleep] Artist!
125
00:05:33,599 --> 00:05:36,569
Ugh!
126
00:05:36,636 --> 00:05:38,137
>> what do you want?
127
00:05:38,204 --> 00:05:41,274
[screaming]
>> oh, dear.
128
00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:42,308
Don't do that to me.
129
00:05:42,375 --> 00:05:43,276
>> oh, man.
130
00:05:43,342 --> 00:05:44,444
That looks painful!
131
00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:47,480
>> aargh!
132
00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:49,649
>> don't do drugs, kids.
133
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:52,652
>> verily I say unto you that
One of you shall betray me.
134
00:05:52,719 --> 00:05:53,920
Ugh!
135
00:05:53,986 --> 00:05:55,488
Judas!
136
00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:58,324
Ha ha, cheap shot!
137
00:05:58,391 --> 00:06:03,229
Oh, lucky for you I'm gonna turn
The other--ha ha ha!
138
00:06:03,296 --> 00:06:05,231
Hey, that's my flesh you're
Throwing there.
139
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:06,432
Ha ha!
140
00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:09,035
>> this fall, get ready for
Adventure and romance in the new
141
00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:11,471
Tv series "Lewis and clark."
142
00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:14,373
>> clark, we've followed this
River for days.
143
00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:17,110
>> we'll follow it as far as it
Goes, lewis.
144
00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:18,644
>> how, explorers.
145
00:06:18,711 --> 00:06:20,847
Do you need direc--
>> hi-yah!
146
00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:22,014
>> oh, clark.
147
00:06:22,081 --> 00:06:26,252
>> oh, lewis.
148
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:29,188
>> that's, um...Pretty much the
Whole joke.
149
00:06:29,255 --> 00:06:31,957
>> and it would've been a lot
More relevant 10 years ago when
150
00:06:32,024 --> 00:06:35,194
"Lois and clark" was still on
The air.
151
00:06:35,261 --> 00:06:39,165
>> I...I have a concussion.
152
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,066
>> ha ha!
153
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:44,237
I need something to whet my
Whistle.
154
00:06:44,303 --> 00:06:47,340
It's a play on words, jackass!
155
00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:49,542
>> d'oh!
156
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:52,678
[whistle blows]
>> now, billy, you might feel
157
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:55,481
Bad about taking the life of an
Animal, but...
158
00:06:55,548 --> 00:06:57,517
[gunshot]
>> yeah!
159
00:06:57,582 --> 00:06:59,018
What else do we kill?
160
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:00,987
>> that's my boy.
161
00:07:01,053 --> 00:07:02,121
>> bam!
162
00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:03,456
All right!
163
00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:05,224
Die!
164
00:07:05,291 --> 00:07:06,993
[cat growling]
>> oh!
165
00:07:07,059 --> 00:07:07,994
>> whoo!
166
00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:09,095
Bam!
167
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:10,663
>> hey, oh! Oh! Oh!
168
00:07:10,730 --> 00:07:11,697
>> whoo-hoo!
169
00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:12,665
>> uh...
170
00:07:12,732 --> 00:07:13,699
>> yeah!
171
00:07:13,766 --> 00:07:15,902
[gunfire]
Yeah!
172
00:07:15,968 --> 00:07:17,670
Die!
173
00:07:17,737 --> 00:07:19,572
Yeah!
174
00:07:19,639 --> 00:07:21,741
All right!
175
00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:23,709
Yeah!
176
00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:26,679
[clicking]
>> finally out of ammo there,
177
00:07:26,746 --> 00:07:28,114
Chief?
178
00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:36,422
>> time to take ol' painless out
Of the bag.
179
00:07:36,489 --> 00:07:37,857
>> high-caliber fun!
180
00:07:37,924 --> 00:07:39,492
Ha ha!
181
00:07:39,558 --> 00:07:42,061
>> hey, milk, you've expired.
182
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,197
>> what?
183
00:07:44,263 --> 00:07:46,599
>> life day...Renew!
184
00:07:46,666 --> 00:07:49,802
Renew!
185
00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:53,005
>> george, did you remember to
Pack hopalonga?
186
00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:54,240
>> hell, yes, I did.
187
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:56,808
I can't oversee the middle east
Peace process without good old
188
00:07:56,876 --> 00:07:57,777
Hopalong.
189
00:07:57,844 --> 00:07:58,811
Bang bang!
190
00:07:58,878 --> 00:07:59,812
You're dead, woman.
191
00:07:59,879 --> 00:08:01,047
>> sir! Sir! Sir!
192
00:08:01,113 --> 00:08:04,984
Air force one, it's...Missing!
193
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:06,052
>> oh, pick up.
194
00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:06,953
Pick up.
195
00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:08,287
Pick up.
196
00:08:08,354 --> 00:08:10,323
>> take that out of your--
Hello?
197
00:08:10,389 --> 00:08:12,425
>> reveal your identity, you
Plane snatcher!
198
00:08:12,491 --> 00:08:13,693
>> oh, sorry there, w.
199
00:08:13,759 --> 00:08:15,528
Had to borrow the old af-1.
200
00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:16,796
We're going to burning man.
201
00:08:16,863 --> 00:08:17,964
Whoo-hoo!
202
00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:21,801
>> please fasten your seat belts
As the ride may get funky.
203
00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:24,237
>> wet blanket alert on the
Phone, y'all!
204
00:08:24,303 --> 00:08:25,304
Who wants more jell-o shots?
205
00:08:25,371 --> 00:08:26,572
Whoo-hoo!
206
00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:29,642
[dial tone]
>> shoot it down.
207
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:33,011
>> "Blackula versus blackenstein
Versus the black mummy" will not
208
00:08:33,078 --> 00:08:40,453
Be seen tonight so that we may
Bring you the following program.
209
00:08:40,519 --> 00:08:41,953
>> hey, sarah.
210
00:08:42,020 --> 00:08:42,989
>> yeah, seth?
211
00:08:43,054 --> 00:08:44,824
>> hey, did I ever tell you
About my cousin?
212
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:45,825
She eats nothing by pancakes.
213
00:08:45,892 --> 00:08:46,626
>> wow.
214
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:47,627
Is she overweight?
215
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:48,527
>> are you kidding?
216
00:08:48,594 --> 00:09:00,506
She's stacked!
217
00:09:00,573 --> 00:09:05,044
[chainsaw revving]
>> hey, breckin meyer!
218
00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:06,345
>> yeah, chinese restaurant guy?
219
00:09:06,412 --> 00:09:07,146
>> yeah, yeah.
220
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,114
You ever see a cat-gopher?
221
00:09:08,180 --> 00:09:09,115
>> cat-gopher?
222
00:09:09,181 --> 00:09:10,349
What's a cat-gopher?
223
00:09:10,416 --> 00:09:12,652
>> cat go for $6 if I put enough
Msg on it.
224
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:13,986
>> ha ha!
225
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,122
Seriously, is this the only part
Of the sketch I'm in?
226
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:18,090
I just spent an hour and 15
Minutes in traffic getting here!
227
00:09:18,157 --> 00:09:20,626
Granted, it's in a benz, but
This is horse[bleep].
228
00:09:20,693 --> 00:09:22,028
[bleep] You!
229
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:22,895
You know what?
230
00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:23,796
I'm going home, ok.
231
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:24,964
You can kiss my ass.
232
00:09:25,031 --> 00:09:27,233
I was in "Garfield,"
Mother[bleep].
233
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:28,734
>> soon you will be free.
234
00:09:28,801 --> 00:09:29,602
>> blue skies!
235
00:09:29,669 --> 00:09:30,703
Barthy burgers!
236
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:31,971
Girls!
237
00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:34,941
>> I meant soon you will be free
To watch our movies on demand
238
00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:35,841
Service.
239
00:09:35,908 --> 00:09:37,410
>> that's still pretty good.
240
00:09:37,476 --> 00:09:40,646
>> unfortunately, the only movie
We have on demand is "Christmas
241
00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:42,048
With the kranks."
242
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:48,754
>> noooo!
243
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:50,823
>> mac, you know I'm a
Vegetarian.
244
00:09:50,890 --> 00:09:51,924
>> mila, this is barth's.
245
00:09:51,991 --> 00:09:54,427
The only real meat here in the
Cockroaches.
246
00:09:54,493 --> 00:09:58,497
>> I heard that.
247
00:09:58,564 --> 00:10:01,233
>> blech!
248
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:03,703
>> blech!
249
00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:07,273
>> blech!
250
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:09,008
>> now, that's comedy.
251
00:10:09,075 --> 00:10:11,444
>> please welcome our special
Guest tonight, vice president of
252
00:10:11,510 --> 00:10:13,179
Adult swim, keith crofford.
253
00:10:13,245 --> 00:10:17,516
[applause]
>> thanks, seth.
254
00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:19,418
I just wanted to say that you
All are doing a really good job
255
00:10:19,485 --> 00:10:20,252
On "Robot chicken."
256
00:10:20,319 --> 00:10:21,320
>> that's great!
257
00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:23,622
So, when are we getting renewed
For another season?
258
00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:30,663
>> um...I don't know.
259
00:10:30,730 --> 00:10:32,264
Ha ha ha.
260
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:37,069
You're cancelled.
261
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:39,438
[captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group]
262
00:10:39,505 --> 00:10:41,807
[captioned by the national
Captioning institute
263
00:10:41,874 --> 00:10:42,875
--www.Ncicap.Org--]
17118
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese