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1
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[thunder]
2
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[drill whirring]
3
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[electric saw buzzing]
4
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- it's alive!
5
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[thunder]
6
00:00:30,330 --> 00:00:34,667
Captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group
7
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- [gasps]
8
00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:44,677
- that better not be poo.
9
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,349
- ha ha ha ha ha!
10
00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:51,851
That'll teach you
To vote for nader!
11
00:00:51,918 --> 00:00:54,020
Ha ha ha ha--huh?
12
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:56,456
What the hell?
13
00:00:57,757 --> 00:01:00,994
- I got laid!
I got laid!
14
00:01:01,060 --> 00:01:02,228
I got laid!
15
00:01:02,295 --> 00:01:04,397
- what can I say?
Nerds are hot.
16
00:01:04,464 --> 00:01:06,065
- gonna tell the internet.
Laid! Laid! Laid!
17
00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:09,436
L-a-y-e-d! Laid, laid, laid,
Laid, laid, laid, laid, laid!
18
00:01:09,502 --> 00:01:11,104
- mmm. Hot.
19
00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:14,841
- simon says...
Go play in traffic.
20
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,009
- yay!
21
00:01:16,075 --> 00:01:18,077
- you know, movie producer
Dean devlin,
22
00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:21,748
I always felt bad about screwing
Millions of moviegoers
23
00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:22,916
Out of their hard-earned money
24
00:01:22,982 --> 00:01:25,285
With that steaming pile of crap
We made called "Godzilla."
25
00:01:25,351 --> 00:01:28,655
- I know, roland emmerich.
We should totally remake it.
26
00:01:28,721 --> 00:01:31,090
- a remake of a remake?
27
00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:32,725
- brilliant!
28
00:01:34,860 --> 00:01:36,429
- the eggs are hatching!
29
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:39,466
Run! Run!
- [growling]
30
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- aah!
31
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:46,206
- [growling]
32
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[screeching]
33
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- whew.
34
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[gasps]
- [growling]
35
00:02:04,157 --> 00:02:06,893
[disco music playing]
36
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[music stops]
- we gave you jerks $150 million
To remake "Godzilla"
37
00:02:25,144 --> 00:02:28,047
And you gave us
A steaming pile of crap!
38
00:02:28,114 --> 00:02:29,682
Again!
39
00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:32,652
- yes!
40
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:35,688
- the only thing we have to fear
41
00:02:35,755 --> 00:02:37,624
Is fear itself.
42
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:38,691
- and spiders.
43
00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:43,530
- well, yes, and spiders.
That goes without saying.
44
00:02:43,596 --> 00:02:44,531
- and snakes.
45
00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:46,132
- yes, snakes, too.
46
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- and don't forget werewolves.
47
00:02:47,267 --> 00:02:53,206
- there is no such thing.
- [all talking at once]
48
00:02:53,273 --> 00:03:01,781
- ooh! Yeah!
Fun! Yeah! Ahaaa!
49
00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:05,852
Aaaah!
50
00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:08,488
- [laughter]
51
00:03:15,562 --> 00:03:16,963
- [indistinct]
52
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,665
[sobbing]
53
00:03:18,731 --> 00:03:20,633
- [retching]
54
00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:23,269
- [laughter]
55
00:03:26,005 --> 00:03:28,608
- [chattering]
56
00:04:39,345 --> 00:04:41,881
[slurping]
57
00:04:42,682 --> 00:04:45,151
- that's right, folks.
We've got a whole lot of
58
00:04:45,218 --> 00:04:47,120
2005 vehicles
That must be sold,
59
00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:51,224
Thanks to crazy davy's
Chapter 11 debt restructuring.
60
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,525
[horn honking]
61
00:04:52,592 --> 00:04:55,962
Yup, there go my wife and kids.
I won't be seeing them again.
62
00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:58,031
Crazy davy's
Circling the bowl, folks.
63
00:04:58,097 --> 00:05:02,602
Hell, just bend crazy davy
Over the hood of this
Fine luxury sedan
64
00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:04,170
And cornhole him
Till you're satisfied.
65
00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:08,574
And as a special bonus,
If you find my brains
On your windshield,
66
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,877
You can have my dog!
67
00:05:11,878 --> 00:05:13,746
Well, better luck next time.
68
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:17,884
- ok, so the only things
We have to fear
69
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:23,189
Are spiders, snakes, werewolves,
Sharks, dying alone,
70
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:28,061
Zombies, clowns,
Heights, big dogs,
Robots with human brains,
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00:05:28,127 --> 00:05:31,731
Johnson's wife, and fear itself.
72
00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:32,832
- [all talking at once]
73
00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,033
- man, my life sucks.
74
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:37,770
I hate working at
The stupid archery range.
75
00:05:39,439 --> 00:05:41,641
Oh, what--where am I?
76
00:05:41,707 --> 00:05:43,810
- you're in purgatory, doug.
77
00:05:43,876 --> 00:05:46,913
Spin the wheel of reincarnation.
78
00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:50,650
- oh, boy.
I hope I land on
Keira knightley's underwear.
79
00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:54,153
- [sighs] Everyone wishes
For that one.
80
00:05:58,257 --> 00:06:00,293
- huggytime bear?
81
00:06:02,495 --> 00:06:04,497
Where am I?
82
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,998
Holy [bleep] Ass crackers!
83
00:06:06,065 --> 00:06:09,168
- welcome! We're
The huggytime bears,
84
00:06:09,235 --> 00:06:12,839
And we shall call you
Doug-a-lot bear.
85
00:06:12,905 --> 00:06:14,474
- what the [bleep] Is
A huggytime bear?
86
00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:20,146
- we spread peace and love
With our special powers.
- [laughs]
87
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,347
- ah...[bleep]
88
00:06:21,414 --> 00:06:23,282
- let's go spread joy
To children!
89
00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:26,619
- oh, man, I wish I landed on
Keira knightley's underwear.
90
00:06:26,686 --> 00:06:29,522
- uh, please don't mention that
Around the children.
91
00:06:29,589 --> 00:06:30,289
- I feel sad.
92
00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:32,358
- yeah, but at least
We're not gay.
93
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,193
- maybe we can help!
94
00:06:34,260 --> 00:06:35,361
- the huggytime bears!
95
00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:39,465
- get ready for some
Fun and love, every--aah!
96
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:42,301
[screaming indistinctly]
97
00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:46,439
- what? His name was
Shamrock bear.
98
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:49,776
He was obviously irish
And, therefore, drunk.
99
00:06:49,842 --> 00:06:51,477
Am I right or am I right?
100
00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:52,979
- this is unforgivable.
101
00:06:53,045 --> 00:06:55,148
- bring out the gimp!
102
00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:59,786
- no, dooon't!
103
00:06:59,852 --> 00:07:02,288
No!
- oh, my gosh, I've shot you.
104
00:07:02,355 --> 00:07:03,322
- keira knightley?
105
00:07:03,389 --> 00:07:04,991
- shh. Don't worry
About a thing.
106
00:07:05,057 --> 00:07:07,026
The paramedics
Will be here soon.
107
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:07,860
- ha ha.
108
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,263
I was almost your underwear,
You know.
109
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:14,367
- ha ha, jerkass.
110
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:16,536
- I got you, timmy.
111
00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:19,772
- I--I can't feel
My arms and legs.
112
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:21,641
- previously on "Big brother,"
113
00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:25,211
A practical joke war
Resulted in hurt feelings.
114
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,345
- oh!
115
00:07:26,412 --> 00:07:28,147
- ghostface's laundry debacle
116
00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:29,849
Earned him the wrath of freddy.
117
00:07:29,916 --> 00:07:31,818
- aw, where the hell's
My sweater?
118
00:07:31,884 --> 00:07:33,553
- chill out.
It's in the dryer.
119
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:37,824
- you fool!
The label clearly says
Permanent press.
120
00:07:37,890 --> 00:07:39,258
- [laughs]
121
00:07:39,325 --> 00:07:42,562
- it says, whoever reaches
The kitten first
122
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:46,666
Will win the golden power
Of vito.
123
00:07:46,732 --> 00:07:49,435
[chainsaw whirring]
124
00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:52,505
- competition was fierce,
125
00:07:52,572 --> 00:07:55,007
But it was leatherface
Who stood victorious.
126
00:07:55,074 --> 00:07:57,743
As a result, it was
Michael and ghostface
127
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,513
Who found themselves
On the block.
128
00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:01,480
- ohh!
129
00:08:01,547 --> 00:08:04,584
- who will be evicted?
Find out live, tonight.
130
00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:07,854
- if ghostface got voted out,
Take it from freddy:
131
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,389
That would be a dream come true.
132
00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:12,258
[laughs]
You get it?
133
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,526
[laughs]
A dream?
134
00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:16,395
[laughs] I kill people
In their nightmares, man.
135
00:08:16,462 --> 00:08:17,396
That's what I do.
It's my thing.
136
00:08:17,463 --> 00:08:19,232
- last week,
America voted online
137
00:08:19,298 --> 00:08:22,235
To decide which houseguest
Would get to call home
138
00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:23,603
On a t-mobile cell phone.
139
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,738
Tonight, we have
The results.
140
00:08:25,805 --> 00:08:28,975
And the winner is...Ghostface!
141
00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,743
- america made the right choice,
142
00:08:30,810 --> 00:08:32,812
Giving the call to ghostface.
143
00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:35,681
Of course, I would've
Called my mum.
144
00:08:35,748 --> 00:08:39,217
Today's her birthday.
I love you, mum.
145
00:08:39,284 --> 00:08:40,519
[telephone ringing]
- hello?
146
00:08:40,586 --> 00:08:42,188
- I see you making popcorn.
147
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:45,591
- [gasps] Who is this?
- I saw the "Charlie's
Angels" sequel.
148
00:08:45,658 --> 00:08:48,928
That was a piece of crap! Ha ha!
- I'm hanging up!
149
00:08:48,995 --> 00:08:51,163
- fighting boredom
Is the hardest part
150
00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:53,933
Of living in
The "Big brother" house.
151
00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:06,879
- in case you were wondering,
152
00:09:06,946 --> 00:09:09,181
The answer was
"The da vinci code."
153
00:09:09,248 --> 00:09:12,451
- it's time to decide
Which houseguest gets evicted.
154
00:09:12,518 --> 00:09:15,788
Michael, ghostface, you may now
Plead your case.
155
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:17,657
- you know, I'm just trying
To keep it real,
156
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:22,194
And I will treasure
The friendships I have made
In this house
157
00:09:22,261 --> 00:09:23,396
My whole life.
158
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:28,167
But if it's my time to go, hey,
No hard feelings. I--
159
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,102
- your turn, michael.
160
00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,840
- stop that.
Stop it!
161
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,108
- the votes have been cast,
162
00:09:36,175 --> 00:09:41,647
And the next houseguest evicted
From "Big brother" is...Michael.
163
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:56,696
Michael myers.
They just kicked you
Out of the house.
164
00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:58,564
How do you feel?
165
00:09:58,631 --> 00:10:02,134
- I feel randy, baby, yeah!
166
00:10:02,201 --> 00:10:05,871
Wayne's world!
Party time! Excellent!
- oh! Ow! Ow!
167
00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:08,541
Stop stabbing me! Ow!
168
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:10,076
[clucking]
169
00:10:10,142 --> 00:10:12,645
Captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group
170
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:17,283
Captioned by the national
Captioning institute
--www.Ncicap.Org--
171
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:26,125
- bock.
[engine running]
172
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:29,962
[monkey chattering]
12157
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