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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,571 --> 00:00:07,340 [thunder] 2 00:00:08,475 --> 00:00:10,343 [drill whirring] 3 00:00:11,544 --> 00:00:13,279 [electric saw buzzing] 4 00:00:17,817 --> 00:00:19,986 - it's alive! 5 00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:29,996 [thunder] 6 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:34,701 Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group 7 00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:44,411 - [growling] - [gasping] 8 00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:45,845 - ah-ah-- 9 00:00:45,912 --> 00:00:46,913 [gunshot] 10 00:00:46,980 --> 00:00:49,883 - the makers of "Grand larceny San diego" are back 11 00:00:49,949 --> 00:00:52,018 With the ultimate Street experience. 12 00:00:52,085 --> 00:00:54,354 Over 40 hours of Original game play 13 00:00:54,421 --> 00:00:58,324 From the authority in Balls-to-the-wall action! 14 00:00:58,391 --> 00:00:59,893 Shoot your parents! 15 00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:02,195 Urinate on the homeless! 16 00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:03,096 Kick a puppy! 17 00:01:03,163 --> 00:01:05,832 Play head-to-head or online! 18 00:01:08,268 --> 00:01:11,371 Make sweet, sweet love To your hot cousin 19 00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:14,374 Or your hot cousin's Mentally disabled friend! 20 00:01:14,441 --> 00:01:17,744 Take out your aggression The old-fashioned way, 21 00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:19,045 With a motor vehicle! 22 00:01:19,112 --> 00:01:21,080 Extra points for Family members! 23 00:01:21,146 --> 00:01:25,785 Unlock expert modes And characters like bam margera. 24 00:01:26,186 --> 00:01:27,987 Rated "E" for everyone. 25 00:01:28,054 --> 00:01:29,556 [rap music playing] 26 00:01:29,622 --> 00:01:31,090 [turns off music] - that was berry rude. 27 00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:33,293 Berry, berry, berry rude To touch my radio. 28 00:01:33,359 --> 00:01:35,428 Do you understand the words That are coming out of my mouth? 29 00:01:35,495 --> 00:01:37,864 - bitch, don't nobody understand The words that are 30 00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:39,265 Coming out of your mouth. 31 00:01:39,332 --> 00:01:42,068 [dance music playing] 32 00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:45,538 - you watch one of the tapes, 33 00:01:45,604 --> 00:01:48,241 And if you like the girl, We'll arrange a meeting. 34 00:01:48,308 --> 00:01:50,310 - so I can pick any tape. 35 00:01:50,376 --> 00:01:53,045 - any tape. Good luck, homey. 36 00:02:01,821 --> 00:02:03,356 - [gasps] 37 00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:06,759 Aah! 38 00:02:09,929 --> 00:02:11,364 Ohh! 39 00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:15,134 Aah! 40 00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:18,805 - I like trees And dolls and ponies, 41 00:02:18,872 --> 00:02:19,906 If they don't Keep me up at night, 42 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:23,476 Long walks by the cliffs, And nice catholic men. 43 00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,945 Hope to meet you soon. 44 00:02:26,012 --> 00:02:28,448 - I think I just [bleep] Out my heart. 45 00:02:28,515 --> 00:02:30,216 [breathing heavily] 46 00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:32,852 I wonder if she puts out. 47 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,722 - you know, um, When a butterfly, 48 00:02:35,788 --> 00:02:36,956 Like, when he flaps his wings, 49 00:02:37,023 --> 00:02:40,192 That has a huge effect All the way around the world. 50 00:02:40,260 --> 00:02:42,929 Like, in, um, japan and stuff. 51 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,930 - really? Uhh! 52 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,534 [rumbling] 53 00:02:50,136 --> 00:02:51,603 - uhh! 54 00:02:55,041 --> 00:02:57,744 - [shouting indistinctly] Aah! 55 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:06,252 - [roaring] 56 00:03:07,186 --> 00:03:10,156 - blow out the candles, grandma! 57 00:03:10,223 --> 00:03:11,090 Grandma? - mom? 58 00:03:11,157 --> 00:03:13,560 - [gasps] - oh, no, mom. 59 00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:17,430 - wait, wait, wait for me. What'd I miss? 60 00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:21,100 - ahh. I really needed this. 61 00:03:21,167 --> 00:03:23,603 - you are finish now, mr. Joe. 62 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,371 You want happy ending? 63 00:03:25,438 --> 00:03:27,473 - uh, what? Oh, no, no. 64 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:28,942 Um, I'm not into that. 65 00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:29,976 - oh, yeah-yeah-yeah. 66 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,377 Very good happy ending. 67 00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:33,913 - no, no, really. That's ok. 68 00:03:33,980 --> 00:03:35,114 No, hey, no-- - happy ending. 69 00:03:35,180 --> 00:03:37,550 - hey, hey--hey, Get away from me. 70 00:03:37,617 --> 00:03:38,451 - happy ending! 71 00:03:38,518 --> 00:03:39,619 - s-somebody help me. 72 00:03:39,686 --> 00:03:41,454 - happy ending! 73 00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:43,823 Yes, happy ending! 74 00:03:44,357 --> 00:03:46,159 Happy ending! 75 00:03:47,192 --> 00:03:47,961 Oh, yeah-yeah-yeah. 76 00:03:48,027 --> 00:03:49,996 - officer, y-you gotta help me! 77 00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,164 - what's going on here? 78 00:03:51,230 --> 00:03:54,334 - ay! - happy ending! 79 00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:58,638 - oh, no! 80 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:00,206 - get out of my room! 81 00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:01,374 - sorry. Excuse me. 82 00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:03,176 Sorry. - I'm not dressed. 83 00:04:03,242 --> 00:04:04,177 - sorry! Watch out. 84 00:04:04,243 --> 00:04:06,613 - happy ending! - coming through! - ...Ending! 85 00:04:06,679 --> 00:04:08,581 - out of my way! - happy ending! 86 00:04:08,648 --> 00:04:10,617 - aah! Aah! Aah! Whoa! 87 00:04:10,683 --> 00:04:13,453 Uhh! Aah! Uhh! Uhh! Aah! Aah! 88 00:04:13,519 --> 00:04:17,255 - happy ending! Happy ending! Happy ending! Happy ending! 89 00:04:17,322 --> 00:04:19,792 Happy ending! 90 00:04:19,858 --> 00:04:21,427 - aah! No! 91 00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:26,065 - with massage, You get the egg roll. Happy ending! 92 00:04:29,068 --> 00:04:32,338 [munch] - mmm. It's good. 93 00:04:32,972 --> 00:04:35,675 [crowd cheering] 94 00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,810 [crowd cheering louder] 95 00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:40,079 [crowd cheering louder] 96 00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,714 [crowd cheering louder] 97 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,582 [crowd cheering louder] 98 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,685 - [scoffs] It's only Women's soccer. 99 00:04:45,752 --> 00:04:47,487 Nobody cares. 100 00:04:48,287 --> 00:04:49,489 - what the-- 101 00:04:49,555 --> 00:04:54,159 - my name is neo, and I'm Going to beat you, robots. 102 00:04:54,527 --> 00:04:59,332 My name is constantine, And I'm going to Defeat you, demon. 103 00:04:59,732 --> 00:05:02,702 I'm the guy from "Speed," And I'm going to stop you, 104 00:05:02,769 --> 00:05:05,805 Famous character actor Dennis hopper. 105 00:05:07,907 --> 00:05:10,309 - cut. - hi. I'm keanu reeves. 106 00:05:10,376 --> 00:05:11,611 I've beaten the world of acting, 107 00:05:11,678 --> 00:05:15,448 And now I'm going to beat The world of breakfast sausages. 108 00:05:15,515 --> 00:05:17,750 They're tasty. Don't believe me? 109 00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,819 Listen to these breakfast fans. 110 00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:24,323 - oh, hello. I did not notice you there. 111 00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:26,626 I'm a fan of sausage. 112 00:05:26,693 --> 00:05:33,066 I like keanu's sausage the best. To eat. 113 00:05:33,132 --> 00:05:37,770 - they're so juicy. I can't start the day without 114 00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:40,973 An amazing sausage in my mouth. 115 00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:45,645 That's where keanu comes in. 116 00:05:45,712 --> 00:05:47,880 [chewing] 117 00:05:47,947 --> 00:05:51,117 - whoa . That's good sausage. 118 00:05:55,388 --> 00:05:56,622 [slurps] 119 00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:59,892 - oh, very good, billy. 120 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:04,063 Just delightful, judy. 121 00:06:04,130 --> 00:06:06,432 [slurps] Excellent, emily. 122 00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:08,301 - [giggles] - hol-- 123 00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:10,670 - ok, people. Stay cool. 124 00:06:10,737 --> 00:06:11,404 Uhh! 125 00:06:11,471 --> 00:06:14,006 Where are the plans? - what? Uhh! 126 00:06:14,073 --> 00:06:17,510 - where are the plans? - I--I don't--I don't kn-- 127 00:06:17,577 --> 00:06:19,112 Aah! - plans! 128 00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:20,446 [telephone ringing] 129 00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:21,314 Kind of busy here, chief. 130 00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,849 - [indistinct voice On telephone] 131 00:06:22,915 --> 00:06:23,983 - whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait. 132 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:27,854 Did you say "Eisenhower middle school"? - [indistinct] 133 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:31,657 - um, heh, sorry, everyone Just a drill. 134 00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,659 [glass breaks] 135 00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:35,561 [tires screeching] 136 00:06:35,628 --> 00:06:37,163 - mrs. Dorsey? 137 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:40,700 - what happens when 200 monkeys Are set loose 138 00:06:40,767 --> 00:06:42,135 On a deserted island? 139 00:06:42,201 --> 00:06:44,971 And what happens if that island Is booby-trapped 140 00:06:45,037 --> 00:06:47,540 With thousands of land mines? 141 00:06:47,607 --> 00:06:50,376 "Crazy monkeys On land mine island." 142 00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:52,078 When subterranean munitions 143 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:54,313 Meet those Semi-intelligent simians, 144 00:06:54,380 --> 00:06:58,117 The results are Outrageously loud. 145 00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:01,754 - [chattering] 146 00:07:03,422 --> 00:07:06,259 - [growling] 147 00:07:09,629 --> 00:07:11,230 - and the fun Really gets started 148 00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,232 When snoop dogg makes the scene! 149 00:07:13,299 --> 00:07:16,102 - hey, y'all, snibbity diggity. 150 00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:18,771 - "Crazy monkeys On land mine island." 151 00:07:18,838 --> 00:07:23,442 - michael flatley is The lord of the dance. 152 00:07:24,210 --> 00:07:28,648 Darth vader is the lord Of the sith. 153 00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:34,053 - like, dude, What are we doing here? 154 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,388 - camp crystal lake, 155 00:07:35,454 --> 00:07:40,092 Supposedly haunted by A machete-wielding spook 156 00:07:40,159 --> 00:07:41,360 Named jason voorhees. 157 00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:44,063 - [whimpers] - we should make like Hockey sticks 158 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:46,699 And get the puck out of here. Ha ha! 159 00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:47,533 - well, hello there. 160 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:49,802 - it's don knotts And phyllis diller. 161 00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:51,470 - we're the camp counselors. 162 00:07:51,537 --> 00:07:52,738 Of course, after this gig, 163 00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:56,075 I'm the one who's gonna Need counseling. 164 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,009 - I suggest we split up. 165 00:07:57,076 --> 00:07:59,178 Shaggy and scooby, You check the campground. 166 00:07:59,245 --> 00:08:00,446 Velma, you check the woods. 167 00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:01,914 Daphne and I'll Check out the bunkhouse 168 00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:04,750 And have some of that nice sex Until you get back. 169 00:08:04,817 --> 00:08:07,053 - sex? You? With her? 170 00:08:07,119 --> 00:08:09,455 But with that dickey, You couldn't even bag 171 00:08:09,522 --> 00:08:11,123 An old bag like me! 172 00:08:11,190 --> 00:08:12,425 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 173 00:08:12,491 --> 00:08:16,229 - it's an ascot, you old whore. An ascot! 174 00:08:16,295 --> 00:08:18,798 [crash] - well, your ass got laid out 175 00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:20,666 By this old whore, dickey. 176 00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:21,901 Hee hee hee hee hee. 177 00:08:21,968 --> 00:08:25,004 - this place gives me, like, The heebie-jeebies. 178 00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:25,905 - ruh-huh. 179 00:08:25,972 --> 00:08:28,841 Ooh, rooby racks. - like, oh, boy! Ha ha! 180 00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:33,880 Man, I am one sad Dog-food-eating hippie. 181 00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,147 [munch] 182 00:08:35,213 --> 00:08:38,317 Like, sorry, man. My mistake. 183 00:08:38,384 --> 00:08:41,020 Yikes! Oh-oh! The killer! 184 00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:42,955 Run, scoob! 185 00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:55,668 Zoinks! - [shouting indistinctly] 186 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:58,337 - better shaggy than me. 187 00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:00,606 - [whimpers] - gosh, freddy, 188 00:09:00,673 --> 00:09:02,174 Are we really Going to go all the way? 189 00:09:02,241 --> 00:09:05,344 - if one more person says Something about my ascot, 190 00:09:05,411 --> 00:09:08,080 I'll--damn, it's fashionable. 191 00:09:08,147 --> 00:09:09,749 - aah! Oh! 192 00:09:09,815 --> 00:09:13,786 Far out. That must be Jason's dead mother. 193 00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:15,454 This explains everything. 194 00:09:15,521 --> 00:09:17,323 - whoooaaa! 195 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,692 That must be Jason's dead mother. 196 00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:21,594 This explains everything. 197 00:09:21,661 --> 00:09:22,762 - fred, you're an [bleep] Hole, 198 00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:25,264 And that ascot Makes you look gay. 199 00:09:25,331 --> 00:09:27,433 - aah! Her first! 200 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,434 Kill her first! 201 00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:30,269 Ohh! - hey! Uhh! 202 00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:34,340 Ohh! Ohh! Aah! Aah! Ohh! 203 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,642 - the virgin always Lives the longest 204 00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:37,977 In these horror movies. 205 00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:39,578 God, my life sucks! 206 00:09:39,645 --> 00:09:40,646 - you think your life sucks? 207 00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:44,383 One of my apartment tenants Might be a flaming homo. 208 00:09:44,450 --> 00:09:47,987 And that ain't all. Somebody killed me. 209 00:09:52,591 --> 00:09:54,460 - mmm. 210 00:09:57,964 --> 00:09:59,165 Mmm. 211 00:09:59,231 --> 00:10:00,299 - huh--huh! 212 00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:03,736 Now we'll see who Jason voorhees really is. 213 00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:07,039 [gasps] Old man phillips? But why? 214 00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:10,609 - spanish doubloons worth Hundreds of dollars 215 00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:12,678 Are sitting at The bottom of the lake. 216 00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:14,313 They would've been all mine 217 00:10:14,380 --> 00:10:17,149 If it weren't for you Meddling kids. 218 00:10:17,216 --> 00:10:19,118 - a--a bunch of coins? 219 00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:20,252 All my friends are dead. 220 00:10:20,319 --> 00:10:24,457 They're dead And I'm still a virgin. A virgin! 221 00:10:24,523 --> 00:10:27,626 - you know, we can fix that. 222 00:10:30,396 --> 00:10:31,697 - [moaning] 223 00:10:31,764 --> 00:10:33,332 - your skin is soft. 224 00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:35,434 - ohh...Brother. 225 00:10:35,501 --> 00:10:37,103 - [laughs] 226 00:10:37,169 --> 00:10:38,504 - oh, wow. 227 00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:43,309 - I know a lot about Pleasing a young child. - give it to me, wise man. 228 00:10:43,376 --> 00:10:46,112 Give it to me. - oh, here you go. 229 00:10:46,178 --> 00:10:47,546 - ohh... - hey! 230 00:10:47,613 --> 00:10:49,682 - oh, I think I've got a clue. 231 00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:51,517 - I've got little To no sensation 232 00:10:51,584 --> 00:10:53,352 In the lower half of my body. 233 00:10:53,419 --> 00:10:55,821 Yeah, yeah! 234 00:10:55,888 --> 00:10:59,525 - what a mystery. - that's what I'm talking about. 235 00:10:59,592 --> 00:11:01,027 - yeah. - good! 236 00:11:01,093 --> 00:11:01,927 - ohh! - oh, yeah! 237 00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:05,731 - ohh! - oh, this is gonna be A long one. 238 00:11:05,798 --> 00:11:08,501 - ow, my back is-- 239 00:11:08,567 --> 00:11:10,102 - ohh... 240 00:11:10,169 --> 00:11:11,203 [monkey chattering] 241 00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,472 Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group 242 00:11:13,539 --> 00:11:19,111 Captioned by the national Captioning institute --www.Ncicap.Org-- 16541

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