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1
00:00:02,035 --> 00:00:06,005
Captioning made possible by
Turner entertainment group
2
00:00:17,584 --> 00:00:20,186
- it's alive!
3
00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:41,307
- oh, my god!
4
00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:42,709
What's happening?
5
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:43,543
What is it--
6
00:00:43,610 --> 00:00:44,511
Look at the size of it!
7
00:00:44,577 --> 00:00:46,312
Why didn't we bring a gun?
8
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:47,447
- this is the true story...
9
00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:48,448
- the true story...
10
00:00:48,515 --> 00:00:49,649
- of 7 strangers...
11
00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,384
- picked to live in house...
12
00:00:51,451 --> 00:00:52,585
- and have
Their lives taped...
13
00:00:52,652 --> 00:00:55,855
- to find out
What happens when people
Stop being polite...
14
00:00:55,922 --> 00:00:58,224
- and start getting real.
15
00:00:58,291 --> 00:01:02,529
- "The real world:
Metropolis."
16
00:01:02,595 --> 00:01:03,763
- ugh!
17
00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:06,132
People in this hellhole
Just don't respect
Personal property.
18
00:01:06,199 --> 00:01:09,569
- listen, I know someone's been
In my underwear drawer.
19
00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:12,172
- ok, which one
Of your perverts was it,
20
00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:12,972
Because it's sick.
21
00:01:13,039 --> 00:01:14,607
- you chicks
Are seriously paranoid.
22
00:01:14,674 --> 00:01:18,845
- I fold them in a very
Particular way, falcon--
23
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,280
In little squares.
24
00:01:20,346 --> 00:01:21,548
- it was probably you.
25
00:01:21,614 --> 00:01:22,449
- aah!
26
00:01:22,515 --> 00:01:23,450
It not hulk!
27
00:01:23,515 --> 00:01:24,117
Hulk swear!
28
00:01:24,184 --> 00:01:26,553
- of course
It was the hulk.
29
00:01:26,619 --> 00:01:27,787
- aah!
30
00:01:27,854 --> 00:01:29,088
- it was me.
31
00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:31,724
Hello, kitty!
32
00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:32,859
Meow!
33
00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:36,128
- listen, uh,
I don't mean to be
Nitpicky or anything,
34
00:01:36,196 --> 00:01:40,467
But the living room
Hasn't been vacuumed
In weeks and--
35
00:01:40,533 --> 00:01:42,769
- hey, waterman,
I was busy,
36
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:46,673
You know,
Realigning the planet
Or something.
37
00:01:46,739 --> 00:01:51,009
- but you drew vacuuming
Out of the job jar
And everyone else--
38
00:01:51,077 --> 00:01:52,011
- face it.
39
00:01:52,078 --> 00:01:53,545
Who's going to save earth
From a giant meteor
40
00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,949
While superman's vacuuming?
41
00:01:56,015 --> 00:01:56,716
You?
42
00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,184
I don't think so.
43
00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,453
- I could.
44
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:01,521
Hey!
45
00:02:01,588 --> 00:02:04,357
Nobody seems to understand
How useful I am, you know?
46
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:05,558
I'm really capable.
47
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,760
I can do lots of stuff,
You know?
48
00:02:07,827 --> 00:02:08,428
Lots!
49
00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:11,965
I can do stuff like, um--
50
00:02:12,031 --> 00:02:13,967
Like, I can--
51
00:02:14,033 --> 00:02:17,036
You know, I...
52
00:02:17,103 --> 00:02:19,639
[sobbing]
53
00:02:27,847 --> 00:02:28,882
[both laughing]
54
00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:32,652
- they still haven't forgiven me
For that stupid party.
55
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,153
Woo!
56
00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:36,489
Come on, baby!
57
00:02:36,555 --> 00:02:39,425
Who wants to pet
This [bleep]?
58
00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:41,928
[burps]
59
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,596
I mean, what is this place,
60
00:02:43,663 --> 00:02:46,065
Some kind of a nun factory?
61
00:02:46,132 --> 00:02:48,101
I just...
62
00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:50,203
[burps]
63
00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:51,237
- got to go!
64
00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:52,505
Got to go!
65
00:02:52,572 --> 00:02:53,239
Aah!
66
00:02:53,305 --> 00:02:54,406
- hey, uh, occupied.
67
00:02:54,474 --> 00:02:55,508
Occupied!
68
00:02:55,575 --> 00:02:57,176
Hey!
69
00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:00,346
Hey, what's up?
70
00:03:00,413 --> 00:03:02,615
- justice never sleeps.
71
00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:05,018
- oh, man, I want to be red.
72
00:03:05,084 --> 00:03:06,052
I hate black.
73
00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:07,554
- oh, it's like that?
74
00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:10,523
So I'm the token
Black superhero, huh?
75
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:12,692
Well, they might
Have wanted tim meadows,
76
00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:14,127
But they got the falcon,
77
00:03:14,193 --> 00:03:17,697
And you damn well better
Respect the falcon.
78
00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:21,901
Of course,
I don't really have
Any superpowers.
79
00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:23,703
Man, my costume sucks.
80
00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:26,839
- come and get it,
Little guys.
81
00:03:26,906 --> 00:03:29,375
Hello?
82
00:03:29,442 --> 00:03:30,577
I know you can hear me.
83
00:03:30,643 --> 00:03:31,477
I'm aquaman.
84
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:33,713
- trouble at home?
85
00:03:34,747 --> 00:03:36,416
- answer me,
You little bitches!
86
00:03:36,482 --> 00:03:38,651
- if you leave your towels
On the bathroom floor,
87
00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:41,054
We start getting
That mildew smell.
88
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:42,121
- it's gross!
89
00:03:42,188 --> 00:03:46,225
- have a little common courtesy
For the rest of us.
90
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:49,696
- the bat signal.
91
00:03:49,762 --> 00:03:50,730
- huh.
92
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:53,399
I wonder where
He's always going
In such a hurry.
93
00:04:04,177 --> 00:04:05,011
[urinating]
94
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,746
- my good plates!
95
00:04:06,813 --> 00:04:08,247
- dishes done.
96
00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:09,248
Despite my best efforts,
97
00:04:09,315 --> 00:04:12,018
Fitting in here
Continues to be
Quite a chore.
98
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:14,220
It...Confounds me.
99
00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:15,455
- on my plates.
100
00:04:15,521 --> 00:04:16,990
My good china plates.
101
00:04:17,055 --> 00:04:19,358
- relax, wondergirl.
102
00:04:19,425 --> 00:04:22,495
- what did you just call me?
103
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:24,764
- I--I am the night!
104
00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:28,768
[whistling]
105
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:30,269
- wondergirl?
106
00:04:30,336 --> 00:04:31,137
Huh.
107
00:04:31,204 --> 00:04:32,071
Wondergirl.
108
00:04:32,138 --> 00:04:33,172
Let me tell you something
About batman, ok?
109
00:04:33,239 --> 00:04:35,775
He's the same
As the rest of these
Guys around here.
110
00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:36,643
They're afraid of women.
111
00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:39,746
They're afraid
Of the almighty uterus.
112
00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:41,180
Almighty uterus!
113
00:04:41,247 --> 00:04:43,216
- next time on "Real world"...
114
00:04:43,282 --> 00:04:45,183
- I don't see why
You're so upset.
115
00:04:45,251 --> 00:04:48,554
What do you need men for
Anyway, huh?
116
00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:50,289
How about a smile?
117
00:04:50,356 --> 00:04:51,624
There you go.
118
00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:52,425
- I'll do it.
119
00:04:52,492 --> 00:04:53,893
I'll do it, man.
I'll totally do it.
120
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,962
- you won't do it.
121
00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:59,365
[both stuttering]
122
00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:01,000
- yahtzee!
123
00:05:01,067 --> 00:05:02,969
- that's it!
124
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:08,274
- meow.
125
00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:09,976
- aah!
126
00:05:15,281 --> 00:05:17,817
- a-a-ah.
127
00:05:19,786 --> 00:05:21,988
[grunting]
128
00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:24,157
- for america!
129
00:05:44,811 --> 00:05:46,846
- where's the bunny?
130
00:05:48,147 --> 00:05:52,318
Wiggle your big toe.
131
00:05:52,385 --> 00:05:53,052
Great.
132
00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:55,521
I am jesus, you know.
133
00:05:56,389 --> 00:05:58,524
- ya shi ma na!
134
00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:03,696
- hi-yah!
135
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:10,369
- oy!
136
00:06:13,973 --> 00:06:16,709
- aah! Aah!
137
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:24,050
- 5-fingered palm of death.
138
00:06:25,985 --> 00:06:28,888
Let me try that again.
139
00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:41,501
- thanks.
140
00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,903
- it's what I do.
141
00:06:55,982 --> 00:07:00,119
- you didn't think
It would be that easy, did you?
142
00:07:00,186 --> 00:07:01,988
- for a second there,
143
00:07:02,054 --> 00:07:05,091
Yeah, I kind of did.
144
00:07:36,422 --> 00:07:39,225
- your change, sir.
145
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,661
- khan!
146
00:07:41,727 --> 00:07:42,762
[screaming]
147
00:07:42,829 --> 00:07:45,298
Khan!
148
00:07:45,364 --> 00:07:46,232
- the next hot game show
149
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:48,601
Has just been imported
From japan.
150
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:50,803
- you want million dollar?
151
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:55,274
You win crazy smile face
Million dollar!
152
00:07:55,341 --> 00:07:57,476
First, you eat.
153
00:07:57,543 --> 00:07:58,878
Food is power.
154
00:07:58,945 --> 00:08:00,646
The power!
155
00:08:00,713 --> 00:08:01,914
Who poop last?
156
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:07,486
You win one million
Mr. Mighty joe dollar
When you poop last!
157
00:08:07,553 --> 00:08:08,888
Who poop last?
158
00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,656
Mao! Mao!
159
00:08:19,465 --> 00:08:20,132
- I'm bill clinton.
160
00:08:20,199 --> 00:08:21,601
I'm going to
Push over that cow.
161
00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:23,836
Ooh, there I go and did it!
162
00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:28,574
- welcome to another
Thrilling edition
Of "Zombie idol."
163
00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:29,675
[applause]
164
00:08:29,742 --> 00:08:32,345
Last week, america voted
In record-shattering numbers.
165
00:08:32,411 --> 00:08:34,013
In fact, phone lines
Were jammed so badly
166
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:38,683
That major metropolitan areas
Temporarily lost 911 service.
167
00:08:38,751 --> 00:08:40,620
Hundreds died.
168
00:08:40,686 --> 00:08:42,989
It all started with
The auditions,
169
00:08:43,054 --> 00:08:45,258
As the reanimated corpses
Of rock and roll
170
00:08:45,324 --> 00:08:47,360
All competed for
A spot on our show.
171
00:08:47,426 --> 00:08:50,429
Past performances from zombies
Such as john lennon
172
00:08:50,496 --> 00:08:52,965
And the beach boys
Tore up our stage.
173
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:55,601
Competition has been
Hot and heavy.
174
00:08:55,668 --> 00:08:57,737
It's time to meet our judges.
175
00:08:57,803 --> 00:09:00,806
Give it up
For frankenberry.
176
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:01,908
- yeah.
177
00:09:01,974 --> 00:09:03,009
Yeah, dawg.
178
00:09:03,075 --> 00:09:03,709
Yeah.
179
00:09:03,776 --> 00:09:05,745
- let's hear it
For boo berry.
180
00:09:05,811 --> 00:09:08,414
- I hope our contestants
Just have fun
181
00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:10,349
And, you know,
Be themselves,
182
00:09:10,416 --> 00:09:14,253
And pretty,
Pretty space people,
183
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:15,021
And a puppy.
184
00:09:15,087 --> 00:09:17,423
- and last and certainly
Not least,
185
00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:19,825
Please welcome
Count chocula.
186
00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:20,793
[audience booing]
187
00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:23,496
- well, I certainly hope
Tonight's performances
188
00:09:23,562 --> 00:09:26,332
Are better than last week's
Ghastly affair.
189
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:27,733
[audience booing]
190
00:09:27,800 --> 00:09:28,734
- nice outfit.
191
00:09:28,801 --> 00:09:31,504
Isn't it gauche
To wear brown
After labor day?
192
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:32,438
[audience laughs]
193
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,372
- I don't know, ryan.
194
00:09:33,439 --> 00:09:35,374
Isn't it gauche
To be a complete douchebag
195
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:36,943
On national tv each week?
196
00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:38,377
- not when you're paid like me.
197
00:09:38,444 --> 00:09:41,347
It's time for our first
Performance of the evening.
198
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,316
Here's bob marley.
199
00:09:43,382 --> 00:09:45,918
[moaning]
200
00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:52,091
[police siren]
201
00:09:52,825 --> 00:09:53,659
- yeah, dawg.
202
00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:54,961
You did your thing.
203
00:09:55,027 --> 00:09:56,128
- marmalade.
204
00:09:56,195 --> 00:09:57,396
- dreadful.
205
00:09:57,463 --> 00:10:00,032
- don't forget
To text message your votes
At the end of the show
206
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:03,069
Because phone companies
Make far more money that way.
207
00:10:03,135 --> 00:10:04,103
It's time to check in now
208
00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:06,739
With our very own
Roving reporter
Kristin holt.
209
00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:09,709
What kind of hijinks
Are going on backstage, kristin?
210
00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:11,811
- ryan, the zombies
Are going wild
211
00:10:11,877 --> 00:10:15,481
After one of the children
From the grant a wish foundation
212
00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:17,850
Fell and cracked his head open.
213
00:10:17,917 --> 00:10:19,285
- brains.
214
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:23,255
- it's like some kind
Of feeding frenzy.
215
00:10:23,322 --> 00:10:24,991
- l.A. Woman...
216
00:10:25,057 --> 00:10:26,459
- aah! Aah!
217
00:10:26,525 --> 00:10:28,294
Aah!
218
00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:32,665
- there's only one way
To stop a zombie.
219
00:10:32,732 --> 00:10:35,935
Blow they're [bleep]
Head's off, baby.
220
00:10:36,002 --> 00:10:36,969
- don't forget
To tell them about
221
00:10:37,036 --> 00:10:40,973
All the great deals
At radio shed, ving.
222
00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:55,221
- don't forget to vote,
Everybody.
223
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:57,490
Good night from "Zombie idol."
224
00:10:57,556 --> 00:10:59,325
Seacrest out.
225
00:11:08,634 --> 00:11:09,869
- brains.
226
00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:12,638
Captioning made possibly by
Turner entertainment group
227
00:11:12,705 --> 00:11:16,308
Captioned by the national
Captioning institute
--www.Ncicap.Org--
228
00:11:16,375 --> 00:11:19,245
[chickens clucking theme song]
229
00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:24,784
- bawk!
230
00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:27,353
- buck.
14873
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