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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,068 --> 00:00:06,072 Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group 2 00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:20,019 - it's alive ! 3 00:00:38,905 --> 00:00:39,806 - yep. 4 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:40,740 [sighs] 5 00:00:40,807 --> 00:00:42,375 [ding dong] 6 00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,210 - oh, will it hurt? 7 00:00:44,277 --> 00:00:45,845 - only if god hates you. 8 00:00:45,912 --> 00:00:46,980 - hey, mama mia! 9 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:48,581 The cannoli, eh, Lasagna! 10 00:00:48,648 --> 00:00:52,051 - hey, pasta fazul, A spicy meatball! 11 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:57,257 [whistling] 12 00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:58,258 [ding dong] 13 00:00:58,324 --> 00:01:01,594 - dude, it's time to Pimp your sister. 14 00:01:01,661 --> 00:01:02,429 - oh, yeah! 15 00:01:02,495 --> 00:01:03,196 Man, I can't believe-- 16 00:01:03,263 --> 00:01:04,364 Yo, man, my sister Right in there. 17 00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:06,566 Come pimp that bitch out! 18 00:01:09,269 --> 00:01:10,103 - wait! W-wait! 19 00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:12,071 Wait! I have homework. 20 00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:15,074 - hey, ladies! 21 00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:17,076 - we gon' pimp you out! 22 00:01:17,143 --> 00:01:20,313 - girl, you got serious Librarian hair. 23 00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:22,682 - you ever see a ho Shop at the gap? 24 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:25,485 - you got the posture Of a lamp post, girl. 25 00:01:25,551 --> 00:01:27,387 We got to give you Some prosti-tude. 26 00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:29,789 - if we go with A leopard print tank top, 27 00:01:29,856 --> 00:01:31,991 That's a little too Southeast newark. 28 00:01:32,058 --> 00:01:34,694 So we're going with More of a cheetah pattern. 29 00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:37,764 - garter belts Ain't just for weddings, Honey child. 30 00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:39,899 You can tuck A weapon in there. 31 00:01:39,966 --> 00:01:41,868 At first, I was pretty nervous, 32 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:45,305 But these hos Are all about class. 33 00:01:45,371 --> 00:01:48,475 - sometimes a john Will want to do that with you, 34 00:01:48,541 --> 00:01:50,076 And that'll cost $10. 35 00:01:50,143 --> 00:01:50,910 - eww. 36 00:01:50,977 --> 00:01:52,745 - this one--$50. 37 00:01:52,812 --> 00:01:53,646 - ugh. 38 00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:56,449 - and this one Gon' require a credit card. 39 00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:58,985 - again! - don't play me! 40 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:00,253 - again! - don't play me! 41 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,556 - all right, alex, Now we ain't had a lot To work with here, 42 00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:05,625 But, yo, Check out your new sister! 43 00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:06,893 - all right, let me see. 44 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:07,861 [gasps] 45 00:02:07,926 --> 00:02:09,461 Oh, damn! 46 00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:10,295 Oh, you put the heels-- 47 00:02:10,363 --> 00:02:11,731 And, oh, You got this garter-- 48 00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:13,533 Damn... 49 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,401 Oh, damn! 50 00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:16,402 It's the new me-- 51 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:20,673 Not just on the outside, But on the inside, too. 52 00:02:20,740 --> 00:02:23,476 [all talking at once] 53 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,311 - it's so hard When they leave. 54 00:02:25,378 --> 00:02:26,312 It's so hard. 55 00:02:26,379 --> 00:02:27,313 - hey, y'all! 56 00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:28,081 Hey, yo, man! 57 00:02:28,147 --> 00:02:29,315 Yo, come get a piece Of my sister! 58 00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:31,117 Who wants to get up In my sister's ass? 59 00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:33,820 - oh, hello, mr. Johnson. 60 00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:34,621 - hello, amy. 61 00:02:34,687 --> 00:02:37,323 Do you take credit cards? 62 00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:41,828 - eww. 63 00:02:42,428 --> 00:02:44,831 - we'll be dead soon. 64 00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:48,234 - ow. 65 00:02:48,301 --> 00:02:50,336 I'm telling my dad. 66 00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:54,007 - welcome to "The surreal life." 67 00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:57,577 - come on, come on. 68 00:02:57,644 --> 00:02:59,078 Get down. 69 00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:03,383 - let's take a look at what "The surreal life" gang Has been up to recently. 70 00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:05,151 - we were really excited To participate 71 00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:07,220 In the iditarod Dogsled race... 72 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:10,857 Till one of the dogs Fell in love with manny mo. 73 00:03:11,190 --> 00:03:12,525 - help! The dog-- 74 00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:13,393 Aah! 75 00:03:13,459 --> 00:03:14,761 - let's see What's in store 76 00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:17,030 For our "Surreal life" folks today. 77 00:03:17,096 --> 00:03:18,831 - we have to take The one ring 78 00:03:18,898 --> 00:03:22,168 And destroy it In the fires of mount doom. 79 00:03:22,235 --> 00:03:25,038 - ooh! 80 00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:31,044 - wait, something's coming! 81 00:03:35,915 --> 00:03:38,551 - aah! 82 00:03:46,091 --> 00:03:47,927 - there's no way I'm doing this. 83 00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:49,629 Somebody better Get me a cab 84 00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:51,564 Because I'm going-- 85 00:04:12,852 --> 00:04:14,520 - we must helps them. 86 00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:16,289 They's our friend. 87 00:04:16,356 --> 00:04:19,192 They hates manny mo. 88 00:04:19,257 --> 00:04:22,428 No, they loves us. 89 00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:26,332 If they dies, We go get pizza. 90 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:29,268 Aah! Aah! 91 00:04:29,869 --> 00:04:32,472 [singing indistinctly] 92 00:04:32,538 --> 00:04:33,573 [urinating] 93 00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,274 - ahh. 94 00:04:37,909 --> 00:04:40,079 [roaring] 95 00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:42,281 - aah! 96 00:04:44,183 --> 00:04:48,588 - back to the fires That forged you, evil trinket! 97 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:49,589 Whoa! 98 00:04:49,656 --> 00:04:51,290 - oh! 99 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:59,132 - corey, you saved me, bro. 100 00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:00,166 - you can burn in hell. 101 00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:01,501 I just want the ring. 102 00:05:01,567 --> 00:05:02,902 - corey, no! 103 00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:03,903 [splat] 104 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:04,704 Oh, bro! 105 00:05:04,771 --> 00:05:07,974 - oh, friends, Remember me fondly... 106 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:12,378 In "Stand by me" And in "The lost boys"-- 107 00:05:12,445 --> 00:05:13,346 Only the first half. 108 00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:16,049 Wait, and "Friday the 13th" Was pretty good-- 109 00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:18,351 - next time On "The surreal life"... 110 00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:23,222 - well, ron and I Had to check out A suspicious meteor. 111 00:05:23,289 --> 00:05:25,091 [beeping] 112 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:27,326 [roars] 113 00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:33,199 - boo ! 114 00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:36,002 Heh heh heh. 115 00:05:38,938 --> 00:05:40,073 [screaming] 116 00:05:40,139 --> 00:05:44,844 - you didn't think It'd be that easy, did you? 117 00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:48,347 Chocolate chicken eggs For everyone! 118 00:05:48,414 --> 00:05:49,615 - 1, 2, 3, 4! 119 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:51,884 We love it when Our players score! 120 00:05:51,951 --> 00:05:53,286 5, 6, 7, 8! 121 00:05:53,352 --> 00:05:54,954 Double entendres Are really great! 122 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:58,157 - I want to go to dallas, But I don't have any money. 123 00:05:58,224 --> 00:05:59,425 - we're such good friends, 124 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,928 We'll have sex With people for money 125 00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:03,129 And give it to you. 126 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:03,796 - yeah! 127 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,665 - oh, best friends forever! 128 00:06:05,732 --> 00:06:10,503 - we're soaking wet From washing your car, Mr. Thrustbone. 129 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:13,439 - is there anything else We can do for you? 130 00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:17,343 - I'll give you $20 For all of us to go crazy. 131 00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:18,044 - wow! 132 00:06:18,111 --> 00:06:21,180 $20 in 1978 dollars Is a lot. 133 00:06:21,247 --> 00:06:22,215 - yeah! Uh-huh! 134 00:06:22,281 --> 00:06:23,649 Unh! Unh! Unh! 135 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:24,584 - yeah! 136 00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:26,285 Oh, you look just like My daughter's friends. 137 00:06:26,352 --> 00:06:27,320 Oh, yeah. 138 00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:28,187 Oh! Oh! 139 00:06:28,254 --> 00:06:30,490 - watch out for the icing. 140 00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:31,357 Dang it. 141 00:06:31,424 --> 00:06:32,692 - we raised $39. 142 00:06:32,759 --> 00:06:36,729 - that's exactly enough To get to dallas. 143 00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:37,430 Yay! 144 00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:40,533 I'm finally in dallas. 145 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,433 - moo. 146 00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:45,738 - oh, I wonder how much It is to get back. 147 00:06:55,548 --> 00:06:58,317 - I'm stepping down The ladder and-- 148 00:06:58,384 --> 00:06:59,652 Uh-oh! Oh. 149 00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:01,721 Uh-oh, I'm falling. 150 00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:02,588 Yeah. 151 00:07:02,655 --> 00:07:04,223 Yeah, I'm falling On the moon. 152 00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:09,095 Yes, I'm falling On the moon. 153 00:07:10,129 --> 00:07:11,898 [thud] 154 00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,599 - aah! 155 00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:19,806 Ok, uh, hailing frequencies Are open. 156 00:07:19,872 --> 00:07:22,608 [all talking at once] 157 00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:27,613 [talking stops] 158 00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:31,951 [all shouting at once] 159 00:07:35,454 --> 00:07:36,055 [sighs] 160 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,790 - is he going to Do it again? 161 00:07:37,857 --> 00:07:39,558 - wrong, Your reservations are. 162 00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,027 For us to listen To ray griffiths, 163 00:07:41,093 --> 00:07:44,263 The actor who played The power droid In "Episode iv," 164 00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:45,665 This is room is scheduled. 165 00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:46,532 - I reserved room a-2 166 00:07:46,599 --> 00:07:47,800 To watch the "Star trek" Blooper reel 167 00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:50,203 Where deforest kelley Grabs majel barrett's chest. 168 00:07:50,269 --> 00:07:52,572 The prime directive demands That you leave the premises. 169 00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:54,340 - the prime directive sucks. 170 00:07:54,407 --> 00:07:56,475 - you suck, You nerf herder! 171 00:07:56,542 --> 00:07:58,711 - ooh, seven of nine... 172 00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,446 - I heard one william shatner 173 00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:03,282 Is going to do A guest spot on "Enterprise" 174 00:08:03,349 --> 00:08:04,884 And not as kirk! 175 00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:05,685 [gasping] 176 00:08:05,751 --> 00:08:06,953 - you take that back! 177 00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:10,656 [making swooshing sounds] 178 00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:11,791 - gentlemen, gentlemen, 179 00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:15,161 We could discuss this Logically. 180 00:08:15,728 --> 00:08:16,662 [all shouting] 181 00:08:16,729 --> 00:08:18,865 - excuse me, I'm ray griffith. 182 00:08:18,931 --> 00:08:20,832 Oh, my face! 183 00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:22,869 - you kids stop. 184 00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:23,736 No fighting. 185 00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:24,770 Oh, get off me. Ow. 186 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:25,705 My neck, my spine. 187 00:08:25,771 --> 00:08:28,507 Oh, no, not like this. 188 00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:33,279 - excuse me, But are you gentlemen 189 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,147 Engaged in a game of larp-- 190 00:08:35,213 --> 00:08:36,315 Live action role-playing? 191 00:08:36,381 --> 00:08:38,351 I happen to be An old hand at it. 192 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:39,652 Aah! 193 00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,054 Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! 194 00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:42,889 Fire--fire-- 195 00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:45,358 - excuse me, That's impolite. 196 00:08:45,424 --> 00:08:47,159 Ow! 197 00:08:47,226 --> 00:08:49,028 Stop! 198 00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:51,864 Oh, that's it! 199 00:08:53,165 --> 00:08:55,534 - all systems ready. 200 00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:05,678 - don't worry, Mr. Schumacher, 201 00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:07,146 We'll get you out of here. 202 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,147 [gasps] 203 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:10,783 - joel schumacher is History's greatest monster. 204 00:09:10,850 --> 00:09:11,717 - get him! 205 00:09:11,784 --> 00:09:12,585 Let's get him! 206 00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:15,621 [all shouting at once] 207 00:09:15,688 --> 00:09:16,622 - got him! 208 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:18,391 I got him! 209 00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:20,426 - keep it coming. 210 00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:21,427 - ok, got it. Got it. 211 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:24,063 - get another one. Get me another one. 212 00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:32,705 - shame on you. 213 00:09:32,772 --> 00:09:35,708 You've all forgotten The true meaning of fandom. 214 00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:38,444 We should take joy In our loves, 215 00:09:38,511 --> 00:09:41,347 Not argue about them. 216 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,214 [laughs] 217 00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:44,483 Son of a bitch! 218 00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:47,086 [gunshots] 219 00:10:11,844 --> 00:10:14,547 Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group 220 00:10:14,613 --> 00:10:18,250 Captioned by the national Captioning institute --www.Ncicap.Org-- 221 00:10:18,317 --> 00:10:22,188 [chickens clucking theme song] 14133

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