All language subtitles for D W V C S01E02 The Giggle 1080p_track3_[eng]-en

Ah! Guten Tag, guten Tag!
Kommen into the warm.

It is ge-raining, is it not?

All of the water
all splishy-splashy.

Now, what can I helpen Sie mit?
Behold, we have everything,

everything you could be
ge-wanten. We have dolls.

Such beautiful
pink-faced dollen, ja?

We have the compendium of games,

mit the dice
und the snaken und ladders,

und the rules, they are
very, very importanten,

these rules, don't you think?

Also, we have the teddy bears

und the hobbyhorsen -
who does not want a hobbyhorsen

to go clippity-clop
down the Strasse, ja? No.

I just want this, really.

Ah! Stooky Bill!

Meine favouriten.

But you will leave
the family all alone.

Poor Stooky Sue
and the poor Stooky Babbies.

You would leave them without Papa?
The widow und the orphans

will be ge-crying. Er...
No, just... Just him. Thank you.

Is that real hair?
Ja. Ja.

I was ge-sticking on the hair
mein self.

I cut it off the head
of a beautiful lady.

She will not miss it. But then...

..she will never miss
anything ever again.

Ha-ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha!

And... And how much is that?

Sixpence.

I really must apologise
for the rain.

You must be used to sunnier climes.

I was born in Cheltenham.

Your accent seems to have slipped.

I hope the kiddies enjoy him.

It's not for children. It's for my
employer. You may have heard of him.

He only lives around the corner.

Mr John Logie Baird.
Oh! The inventor man. Wunderbar.

What is he being inventing now?

Well, it's complicated.

It's a new thing...

..called television.

Well, what a game we are playing.
What a wonderful, wonderful game.

Poor wee Stooky.
That's a Scottish word.

Do you know what stooky means?

It comes from stucco, as in plaster,

but it's come to mean
stupid and slow.

Like Billy Boy's an idiot.
But he can't be that daft.

He's about to make history.

Ready now? I think so.
May God go with us.

I did it, Charlie! I did it!
The very first television picture.

How hot is it in there?
Not going to catch fire, are we?

That's why we need Stooky Bill.

No man could sit
underneath that temperature.

Problem is, it could be
a photograph.

If I'm to prove television works,
I'll need a moving image.

I got quite the shock!

Me too!

Imagine if he could talk.

That wee chap's
about to change the world.

Imagine what he would say.

Ha-ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha!

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Excuse me.
Can you tell me, what are you doing?

I can't drive.

OK, so... Which means...?

I pay my taxes, which means
I've paid for this road.

It is mine, and I will do with it
what I like.

You'll get yourself killed!
It's my life, not yours.

You could...just stand over there
and be safe.

Blame them!

Because it all changed
two days ago.

Everyone started thinking
they're right,

all the time, and they won't
change their mind.

If you try to argue, they go mad.

Well, not me.
I've always been right.

Excusez-moi, monsieur.
Je suis terrible.

But perhaps you will dance
avec moi. Ooh-la-la!

Er, sorry. Thanks.

Attention, the Doctor!

Attention, the Doctor!
Stay where you are.

You are under UNIT control.
Repeat, UNIT control.

Go, go, go!

Quick, Doctor!

Doctor? I'm Colonel Ibrahim
of UNIT Squad 5.

If you could come with us.
Get him to safety.

All right? Never mind about us.
I want my grandad safe.

All right, you got that? Yes, ma'am.
We'll keep your family safe.

You go with the Doctor.

Oh, here comes trouble.

I could say the same about you.
Shirley, you can't be serious.

And Kate Lethbridge-Stewart!

I remember your father working
night and day to keep UNIT secret,

and look at you now, out and proud
and defending the Earth.

I fought them all. Robots
and insects and Yetis and clones.

But what do we do this time, Doctor?
How do we fight the human race?

That's for you. Good, good, good.
Now, what have we got?

Are these worldwide? Because I'm
going to need all the statistics...

Oh, no way. Oh, that is
the best news! Melanie, hello!

We'll catch up later. We haven't got
time. I used to be like you.

I was one of his companions.

I wasn't the first redhead?
No, that was me.

Although don't say companion.
That sounds like we park him

on the seafront
at Weston-super-Mare.

Is "park" rude? Borderline.

And stations. Gold protocols,
the Doctor's in the room - report.

Two days ago, an increase
in violence worldwide -

the same increase in every country,

and all rising
at exactly the same rate.

Basically, every single human being

thinks they're right
and won't be told otherwise.

That plane crash,
the F665 Boston to Heathrow.

The pilot declared his right
to land wherever he wants.

I'm coming home!

Look out, London!
Daddy's coming home! Ha-ha!

But if everyone's going mad...

So is the Government.

What do I care? I mean, seriously.

Why should I care about you?

No change there, then. But you're
fine. You're completely normal.

And that's because of the...?

We call it the Zeedex.
An invention of the Vlinx.

Hello, the Vlinx. I'm the Doctor.
So why is it called a Zeedex?

Good name. It disrupts the brain,
flattens the spike,

keeps everything calm.
And the spike is...?

I think I need to show you.

Activate brain scan.

Activating, ma'am.

That's my brain activity. Seems
normal, albeit slightly heightened,

given the end of the world.
Now, keep your eye on the scan.

And deactivate my Zeedex.

Kate Lethbridge-Stewart.

Off.

Well?

Um...hello?

Hello. How are you?
Fine. Busy day?

Why do you want to know?

I'm just asking. Is that a problem?
It's an invasion of my privacy.

In fact, it's an assault
on my civic rights. And I think

it's highly relevant that the person
demanding information from me

is an alien. OK.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I think you'll find
that I'M in charge here.

And we've been infiltrated by
an alien, by a man with two hearts,

a man who changes his face
and cannot be trusted.

And you, and her,
both with red hair.

What is this? Some sort of
conspiracy? What are you hiding?

And as for her in that chair,
I've seen you walk.

I've seen you walking.
Don't deny it!

No! You can't stop me! It's
about time you heard the truth.

Activate Zeedex.

I'm sorry.
No, it's OK.

Shirley!

I'm so sorry.
Absolutely no need.

It's... It's not just me.

It keeps spiking
inside every single person's head.

But what's that mean?
It's being beamed in from outside?

No, it is natural.
It is generated inside the brain.

But not me. Not Grandad.
Nor me.

I'm wearing a Zeedex
just in case, but I've been fine.

Well, no more opinionated
than usual. You and me both.

Maybe long-term travel in the TARDIS
puts you out of sync.

Can't you give everyone a Zeedex?

Imagine trying that.

They are using this to control us

and monitor us

and microwave our brains.

I am anti-Zeedex!

Can we filter this wavelength,
lose the background noise? Mm-hm.

Gives us a strong coherent wave
in the Seizure Focus,

peaking seven times.
So, this started two days ago.

But why then? What else
happened on that day?

Exactly. We've been looking for
a trigger. And there's this,

the KOSAT 5 satellite
launched by South Korea,

activated two days ago. And here
it is right now, 36,000km above us.

KOSAT is the final link in the
chain. The world is now 100% online.

From the highest mountain
to the deepest valley on Earth,

everyone is connected.
But KOSAT is clean.

We've checked and double-checked.

It's not like
the old Archangel Network.

There's nothing hiding
in that signal. And yet...

..for the first time in history,
everyone has access to this.

A screen.
What if it's a tune?

What? I know we've only got minutes
to live, but give me a second,

because I spent six months teaching
my daughter how to play the recorder

till she said,
"This is not who I am."

And that was the start of a whole
other conversation, believe you me.

But if...

..you look at these seven peaks...
like this...

Maybe it's music.

A classic arpeggio.
Middle C an octave higher.

Oh.

What? What is it?
Sing that again.

I know that tune. I know that
from somewhere. What are the notes?

C-E-G-C-G-E-C.
It's a musical palindrome.

But it's just a straightforward
arpeggio. Everyone knows arpeggios.

It's a basic tune.
So the question is...

..why are we all reacting
to this one? I'm not. The Vlinx?

Negative. Just the humans.
It's just...it's so familiar.

It's like it's been buried in
my head for years. Oh, what is it?

I've found
the exact same notes.

Oh, it's not a tune.

The giggle in everyone's head.

What is that thing?

Stooky Bill. The first face
to ever appear on television,

put there by
John Logie Baird himself.

But I've never seen him before,
so how do I know that laugh?

If the very first image has been
hiding in every screen ever since...

..sneaking into your head,
carving a wave...

..and waiting...
But hiding how?

If there were secret pictures inside
every television, we would have

found it. What,
because you're so clever?

Maybe Stooky Bill's
a lot smarter than you.

Imagine...if he burnt himself
into television itself

and every picture ever since,
every single one...

..screen...after screen...

..after screen.

And every type of screen,
every one and everywhere,

he's inside 'em all. Two days ago,
he finally connected worldwide,

branding his giggle into your brains

until he had enough screens
to be complete.

Since the very first existence
of television,

laughing at the human race...

..and driving you mad.

But something on that scale over
so many years, who could do that?

The puppet's just a puppet.
We're looking for the puppeteer.

And I've got a memory.
I think something's coming back...

..after a very long time.

But it's not only the giggle. Don't
go thinking you've got an excuse.

The human race might be
clever and bright and brilliant,

it's also savage and venal
and relentless.

All the anger out there
on the street, the lies,

the righteousness - that's human,
that's you. That's who you are.

Using your intelligence to be
stupid. Poisoning the world.

And hating each other? You've never
needed any help with that.

But today...

..something else is using
your worst attributes...

..playing with you...

..like toys.

Can we take that satellite down?
All missiles are on lockdown,

but we've got the Galvanic Beam.
What range? We can pick off

a pebble on the moon. Trouble is,
taking out a South Korean satellite

will have international
consequences,

so we've been waiting
for permission.

All world leaders are being
affected by the giggle.

You have my permission.

Thank you, Doctor.

Gold protocol override. All staff
initiate Galvanic activation.

Bring up the beam.

Platform in motion. Shirley,
have we got the exact date

that Logie Baird made
that transmission? I'll find it.

All clear on the helipad.

I fed the KOSAT fake coordinates
so it's coming into UK orbit.

Within range in three minutes.
You're brilliant.

Hello. Hi.
Platform loading.

You look so well. But how?

Well, quick version -

I travelled the stars
with good old Sabalom Glitz.

He lived till he was 101.
Whoa.

Died falling over a whisky bottle.
It was a perfect way to go!

He had this great big Viking
funeral, and then I thought...

"..Time to go home." So I got a lift
off a zingo and came back to Earth.

What's a zingo? It's a thing
you get a lift off.

But then I had to face up to the one
thing I'd been running away from.

I've got nothing.

My family are all gone. Remember?

But then Kate offered me
a job, and...here I am.

Galvanic Beam payload, boarding.
Platform locking at Level 55.

That was very good work
with the music.

Oh... If we survive this,
you should think about joining UNIT.

How much per year?
60,000.

120 plus five weeks' holiday.

Done.

Galvanic Beam in position.
KOSAT in range in 90 seconds.

Doctor? Stooky Bill was televised
the 2nd of October 1925

at 22 Frith Street, Soho, W1D 4RF.

Fire when ready,
don't wait for me. TARDIS?

Suite 17.

OK.
You're not going without me!

Soho, 1925.

So, what about Mel?

Ha-ha! She's brilliant, isn't she?

Yeah, but I just keep thinking -
all this time,

you've never mentioned her.
Donna, I'm a billion years old.

If I stood and talked about
everyone I'd ever met,

we'd still be in the TARDIS,
yapping. So you talk

about no-one, ever?

You just keep charging on.
Yes, because I'm busy right now.

But you are busy
every second of every day.

I mean, look at us now.
We haven't stopped.

I saw you, Doctor. I got
a glimpse inside your mind,

and it's like you're staggering.
You are staggering along.

Maybe that's why your old face came
back. You're wearing yourself out.

Stooky Bill might be on
Frith Street, but the question is,

where did Stooky Bill come from?

Oh!

The ball is the first game
ever being invented.

Stone Age man, he picked up a rock.
He said, "Oh, das ist ein ball!"

He throwed it, und he killed a man.
He said, "Oh, what fun."

Und now everybody loves the balls!

Until the year five billion,

when the very last human
picks up the skull of his enemy

und says, "That is
the final ball of all." Ja?

Enough!

Ah!

Donna Noble. I wondered
which one of you had ze balls.

OK, so you know my name.

How do you two know each other?
Donna, go back to the TARDIS.

What?
Go back to the TARDIS.

You never tell me to do that.
Oh, but he is recognising me.

Are you not ge-pleased, Herr Doctor,

to see me again
after so many years?

Who is he?

The Toymaker.

We meet again, Doctor.

But think!
If the ball was the very first game,

what was the second?

Hide-and-seek!

Ha-ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha!

No, no, no, no, no, no! Go back.

It's bigger than the shop. Don't
tell me he's got his own TARDIS.

The TARDIS is an idea
the Toymaker would throw away.

We've stepped inside his domain, and
it's governed by the rules of play.

OK. Keep going forward.

But how does this even make sense?

Because I've seen some things
with you. I've seen Ood, Davros...

I mean, the Adipose, for God's sake!
But they had a sort of logic.

Daleks built a great big bomb,
I understood that. But this...

This is impossible.
How does it exist?

That's what unravels me -
all the laws I cling to, gone.

Who is the Toymaker?

What is he?

When I was young...

..I was so sure of myself
I made a terrible mistake.

I let the TARDIS
fall into another realm,

a hollow beneath the Under-Universe,

where science is a game
and all of us are toys.

But you escaped! I beat
the Toymaker, I won his game,

but now he's here.
He's found his way into reality.

And I think it's all because of me.

Because I got clever, didn't I?

I cast that salt
at the edge of the universe.

I played a game and let him in...

..an elemental force with the power
of a god, and he's driven

the human race mad with a puppet.
Yeah, but you always said...

Oh, what do I say? What do I say?
What do I say?!

Because I'm always so certain.

I'm all sonic and TARDIS
and Time Lord. Take that away...

Take away the toys...

..what am I? What am I now?

I don't know...

..if I can save your life this time.

It's not about me.
Oh, yes, it is.

Well...

..maybe I'll save you.

You...big idiot.

Anyway, you beat him before.
That's the problem.

Odds on I'll lose next time.

No. Doesn't work like that.

Because my dad used to say,

"Dice don't know
what the dice did last time.

"Games don't have a memory.

"Every game starts from scratch."

Oh, I like that. Well said, Dad.

OK. Shall we...

..find the right door?

Donna?
Doctor!

Donna, don't move.

Can you hear me?
Are you there?

Doctor!

Just stay there. I'll try
another door. I'll try another door.

Don't move.

Help me. Please help me!

I'm here. I've got you.
What is this? What happened?

I bought a toy.

And I paid the price.

It's OK. Just let me...lift you
off, and I'll take the weight, OK?

Ready? Hup!

I came back to the shop...
because I couldn't...

..I couldn't stop hearing him.

The giggle. The giggle in my head.

What are these?

I asked him to stop...

..the giggle. And he said...

"..I will stop if you play my game."

But I lost.

Now I dance. Whenever he commands,
I dance and I prance,

but I can never go home again. No.

What would Mummy say
if she saw me like this?

Please, help me.

Do you like my puppets, Doctor?
Do you like my fun?

All of them have played and lost,

but here's my favourite one.

Hello? Who's that? Where are you?

My name's Donna, and I warn you now,
if this is a trick,

I will kill you.

I'm poor wee Stooky Sue.
I don't know what to do.

I lost my precious hubby.
They threw me in the cubby.

You're not real.
They took my Bill away.

I mourn him every day.

He won't come home to me.

Cos they burnt him on TV.

You're just...

..a doll.

Now the Stooky Babbies weep.
The Stooky Babbies cannae sleep.

They miss their dear papa.
They seek him near and far.

They miss their kiss goodnight.
They greet in endless night.

Mama!

Stooky Babbies are so sweet.

Stooky Babbies want to eat.

You've seen the widow cry.

And now it's time to die.

Hello, Sooky. My name's Donna.

Now I think that you're a goner.

Anything to add...

..Babbies?

Oh, my God.
There you are!

Kommen Sie, kommen Sie!

The show is just beginning.

Worldwide premiere.

Donna Noble, this is for you.
Let me tell you what happened.

When the Doctor, he was leaving you,
he met eine friend called Amy Pond.

Und he loved Amy Pond.
Yes, he be liking the redheads.

Und they went to and fro
in time und space, but...

..Amy Pond was touched
by der Weeping Angel,

und she died!

SNIP

She died of old age.

Well, that's all right, then!

Und then he was meeting Clara.

Ooh! But she was killed by a bird.

She still survives
in her last second of life.

Well, that's all right, then.

But then the Doctor met Bill.

Not Stooky Bill, but lady Bill.

But she was killed by the Cybermen.

SNIP

But her consciousness survives.

Oh, well,
that's all right, then!

Und then there came the Flux.

Oh, Donna Noble, the poor Doctor.

The Flux...

..was killing everything.

Is all of this true?

I challenge you to a game.

I accept the challenge.

You have no choice. I came
to this universe with such delight.

And I played them all, Doctor.

I toyed with supernovas,
turned galaxies into spin tops.

I gambled with God
and made him a jack-in-the-box.

I made a jigsaw out of your history.
Did you like it?

The Master was dying
and begged for his life

with one final game,
and when he lost,

I sealed him for all eternity
inside my gold tooth.

There's only one player
I didn't dare face.

The One Who Waits.

Who's that?
I saw it hiding,

and I ran.
What do you mean?

Hmm. That's someone else's game.

What shall we play?
One request. Tell me.

The human race back in the future -

why does everyone think
they're right? So that they win.

I made every opinion supreme.
That's the game of the 21st century.

They shout and they type
and they cancel. So I fixed it.

Now everybody wins.

And everyone loses.
The never-ending game.

Now name your challenge.

The simplest game of all. Let's cut.

Highest card wins.
Aces high. You choose.

I'll go first.
But he'll cheat.

No. No! Shame.
That's the one thing he won't do.

But they're his cards. It's
all tricks. Of course he'll cheat!

The only rules the Toymaker follows
are the rules of the game.

They bind his entire existence.

I win or I lose, and that's it.

Then play.

My turn.

I'm the king. Und now,
meine kleine Doctor,

we will see what is my prize.

One...

..all.

I won the game many years ago,

you've won today,
which leaves us equal.

And you know two players are bound
by one inviolable rule.

Best of three.
Best of three.

Then let's make it 2023.

Donna!
I'm already running!

He said 2023.

Winner takes all.

We're one degree and 27 minutes out.

Give it a base-drive reset.
Galvanic Beam reset and reload.

Galvanic Beam resetting from base.

Accuracy 100%. Systems locked
and loaded. Satellite within range.

And fire.
Yes, ma'am.

We did it! Success!

Keep an eye on that.

The satellite was only a link
in the chain, so Donna needs access

to the sub-frame. There is no-one
in London faster on a keyboard.

She's creating a template for this.

It coordinates all telescopes
and satellites and deep-space scans

across the Earth. The Vlinx,
I need all mesh reflectors on Earth

translated into Digital 5.
Mesh reflector link.

Mel, is this static or dynamic?
Dynamic. We're using Triad.

Gotcha. OK, so you should all
be receiving this...

..now.

How bad is it, Doctor?

Something entered this world
in 1925. I don't know how.

And I warn you, this thing
can get from 1925 to now

like stepping through a door.

But if we're lucky, the program
I'm giving you can detect

the decay of an energy signature
from 98 years ago.

It might be on Earth, might be
in orbit, might be in space.

But if we can find the entrance,
maybe we can turn it into an exit.

What are we fighting?

An elemental force...
beyond the rules of the universe.

What's that supposed to mean?

You think life is a balance
between order and chaos.

But the universe is not binary.
Far from it.

There is order and chaos...

..and there is play. What's that?

Could you turn that off,
please? Who is that?

Oh, I think he's here.

Detain him!

No, don't!

What happened to them?
They're dead. I'm sorry.

Just stop it. Let me talk to him.
Come on! Open fire!

Take him out. Take him out!

Stay where you are!
Get down!

You OK? I'm fine. I was lucky.
Doctor, who is he?

The Toymaker. How does he do that?
The Vlinx, speed up those scans.

I need those results.
All of you, search the building.

He's still here. Where's he gone?
Secure the perimeter!

But how does he do it? If I told you
he manipulates atoms

with the power of thought, would you
believe it? Is that what he does?

No. You can't fight him, Shirley,
there's nothing you can do.

Listen. Oy, just...listen.

Oh, my God.

He's got the Galvanic Beam.

Achtung, achtung!

Backen Sie.

Oh, how I am liking this,

the gun mit the laser
und the bang und the boom.

Go back inside! Get back, get back!

No, no, no, no, no. Every game
is ge-needing an audience, ja.

Get back inside!
Und I said nein!

Now we can all have some fun.

Where are my staff?
The beam had a pilot,

and the armourer and
the ground staff. Where are they?

I think they're still falling.

I don't understand...

..why you're so small!

You can turn bullets into flowers.

Think of the good you could do.

So tell me why you don't! You know
full well this is merely a face

concealing a vastness
that will never cease,

because your good and your bad
are nothing to me.

All that exists
is to win or to lose.

And you know full well
that I've had many faces...

..containing something far more.

So come with me.

Leave this tiny world.

We can take your games
back to the stars.

We can play across the cosmos.

We can be...

..celestial.

The Time Lord and the Toymaker?

Infinite games.

And yet...

..I have fallen in love
with humanity.

This world is
the ultimate playground.

All of the sport,
the matches, the medals,

the gambling and the anger
and the children

shackled to their bedrooms with
their joysticks and their buttons.

You make games out of bricks
falling upon other bricks.

You are exceptional. And then
there are the mind games.

Oh, the dating and ghosting,
the deceit and the control.

You make me dizzy. I am in no hurry
to leave this place.

We can play Grandma's Footsteps.

And Off-Ground Touch.

Ah! Stop, stop, stop, stop!
Shooting ducks. Who's next?

The companion? The soldier?

The scientist? The orphan?

Your fight is with me!

And you owe me...

..one more ga...

I played the first game
with one Doctor.

I played the second game
with this Doctor.

Therefore, your own rules
have decreed I play the third game

with the next Doctor.

He's not dying alone.

You can do what you like to me.

I'm going to be with him.

And so am I.

Handmaidens.

It's OK. It's not dying.
I know. But...

You're going to be someone else.
It doesn't matter who...

..because every single one of you
is fantastic.

It's time.

Here we go again.

Allons-y!

Erm...

What's happening?

Could you...pull?

Could I...what?
And you. What do you mean?

Pull! Pull? Pull?
Just pull each way.

I don't know.
It feels different this time.

Ow!

What?

What?
What?!

No way.

You're me.

No, I'm me.

I think I'm really, really me.

Oh-ho-ho, I am completely me!

Don't just stand there. Push!

- What?
- Push.

- Does this work?
- I don't know.

Hello!

- Look at you!
- So good!

Now, someone tell me
what the hell is going on here.

Excuse me. Sorry, but...

How did that happen?

Bi-generation.

I have bi-generated!
There's no such thing.

Bi-generation is supposed to be
a myth, but...

..look at me.

Yeah, myth, myth, myth.
Mel, what do you think?

I think you're beautiful.

Still beautiful?

Yeah...

Do you come in a range of colours?

Yes.
If I can interrupt...

Behold the game of the Time Lords.

A dummy who dies and doubles
and dies and doubles.

I could play this for 100 years.
I'll have vast meadows of Doctors

dying over and over again, and
I'll never get bored, because...

I challenge you to a game.

There's two of you.

- I'm the Doctor.
- And I'm the Doctor.

And according to the rules,
you can't say no.

But that's cheating.

How?

It's your game,
and you did this.

But...
You doubled us.

I accept your challenge.

Get back. Moments like these
are a joy,

when someone thinks they can outwit
the maker of the games.

Do you think a grand total of two
can cause me to shiver

when I've played against
the Guardians of Time and Space

and shrank them into voodoo dolls?
Name your challenge, Doctor.

You said it. The first game ever.

The ball.

Catch? Of course, before we begin,
there is one thing to remember.

It's a simple game,
really, but I think...

..if you drop it, you lose.

Nice.

Hey! I'm on your side!

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!

But...
We won!

We did it.

Fair game. You lost.

No, but I think you'll find...
Best of three.

And my prize, Toymaker, is to
banish you from existence for ever.

No! But I'm...

It's not...

You can't...

But I...

Not fair!

Please.

My legions are coming.

Take it to the deepest vault
and bind it in salt.

Yes, ma'am. Shirley, tell Geneva
we're in full resus.

Tell every base to follow
Green Shoot protocols, full liaison.

Rudi, I'll want the names
of all those staff.

Hey.

We did it.

But how many died down there?

That's not your fault.

You can't save everyone.

Why not?

Come here.

I've got you. Yeah?

It's OK. I'm here.

And that's the petrolink
shatterfy compensator,

moved from there to there.

Hyperdynes, er,
fluid links, obviously.

And, well, you know...

Things. But, um...
how's it going to work?

You and me.

This is great, I think.
Is it? But...

How do we both...?

One thing you need in this place
is a chair.

I'll be all right.

No, you're thin as a pin, love.

You're running on fumes.
That's what I keep saying.

I'm just...post-bi-generation.

Ah! It's more than that.

Our whole lifetime.

That Doctor that first met
the Toymaker never, ever stopped.

Put on trial, exiled, Key to Time,
all the devastation of Logopolis.

- Adric.
- Adric.

River Song. All the people we lost.
Sarah Jane has gone.

Can you believe that for a second?

I loved her.

I loved her.

And Rose.

But the Time War, Pandorica,

Mavic Chen.

We fought the Gods of Ragnarok,
and we didn't stop for a second...

..to say, "What the hell?"

But you're fine.

I'm fine because you fixed yourself.

We're Time Lords.
We're doing rehab out of order.

He's saying you need to stop.

I don't know how.

Well...

..I can tell you.

Cos you know what I did

when you went flying off
in your blue box, Spaceman?

I stayed in one place...

...and I lived
day after day after day.

It would drive me mad.

Yeah. It does.

But you keep on going.

And that's the adventure.

The one adventure you've never had.

Because I've...

..I've worked out what happened.

You changed your face...

..and then you found me.
Do you know why?

No.

To come home.

Do you mean...

..he flies off?

But I could never let the TARDIS go.

- Never. It would hurt.
- Yeah, but...

..bi-generation
has never happened before.

What if...?

What if!

What if the Toymaker's domain
is still lingering?

Just for a few seconds more, we're
in a state of play. Oh! So maybe...

Hey! Watch this, watch this.

Watch, watch, watch, watch.
Stand back. Stand back.

Go on, that's it, Donna.

Oh! Wish me luck.

- What for?
- We won the game.

You get a prize, honey.

And here is mine!

Ta-da!

I am so sorry.

That is completely nuts.

Oh, look!

Oh, that's not bad.
Wheelchair accessible.

At last, you finally caught up
with the 21st century!

Yeah.

Go on.

Ooh, jukebox.

OK...

Boom.

Where is he?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

You weren't going to leave
without saying goodbye, were you?

As if I would ever do that.
Come here.

Come here, come here,
come here, come here.

Look after him, you know?

Now, you two, if you don't mind,
there is a great big universe

out there calling, and I've got to
get going. So off you pop, old man.

Oh! You're the old man.
You're older than me.

Actually, that is true. He's younger
because you came after him.

So you're the older Doctor.

OK, kid. I love you.

Get out!

I'm not doing that again!

Shirley, I don't suppose

you've seen this before.
I don't see it often myself.

Stand by.

Where's he going?

Everywhere.

Good luck.

Right. The cast-iron pot
is the vegan. Ta-da!

And the one with the flowers
is the chicken.

Uh-huh. I think.
And this is cauliflower cheese,

which doesn't really go with
anything, but it was there.

Anyway, shush, please,
for the eyebrow story.

Oh, yes. So...

..this species only communicated
with their eyebrows.

I thought, "I can do that."

So I'm stood there
on this clifftop and I went...

"..I mean you no harm.
I come in peace.

"I am your friend."
Am I late? Sorry.

The door was open. You don't mind?
Oh, you're family, darling.

Sit down. Did you drive?
No. I got a lift off a zingo.

A zingo!

Oh, how strange.
So, she looked at me,

the Warrior Queen of the Felooth,
and she said,

"Good. And now...

"..you will marry me."

I said, "What?!"
And she pushed me off the cliff!

But is it true, though?
Is it really true?

Mm... We could always go
in the TARDIS and find out.

Don't you dare! You are grounded
until the Doctor feels better.

Don't go sneaking off to Mars.

Again.
What does that mean?

Oh, no. It was just once.
Oh, you're in trouble.

He took me to New York
last week.

The Gilded Age. It was amazing.
Well, yeah.

Just can't turn down
my favourite niece.

Oh! Niece. I like that.
Well, that's what you are.

With my best friend,
my brother-in-law,

the evil stepmother...
Oh, I have barely begun.

..and Mad Aunty Mel.

Mad Aunty Mel! Mad Aunty Mel.
Mad Aunty Mel!

And Grandad! Where is he?

Oh, he's off shooting moles.

Oh! Don't worry,

I gave the moles a forcefield. I
love the moles. You love the moles?

I love them.

But here we are...

..Grandad and all.

Who'd have thought?
I ended up with a family.

Oh, my God, I got it wrong.
The vegan one is in the flowers!

Oh! What am I eating?
Oh...

Don't worry. We'll just...
Don't make a fuss.

Give it to Grandad.
Give me your plate.

You don't have to stay for ever.

We'll see.

Do you miss it? Out there?

The funny thing is, I fought all
those battles for all those years...

..and now I know what for.

This.

I've never been so happy in my life.

Oh, that's better.