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1
00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:54,722
I was right. I was right.
2
00:00:54,822 --> 00:00:57,592
Now, that's nice.That's got me, that's good.
3
00:00:57,692 --> 00:00:59,727
Most people don't get me, youknow.
4
00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:02,764
Nobody's direct anymore, you
notice this?
5
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:06,433
Everybody's got, like, a secret
language.
6
00:01:06,534 --> 00:01:09,671
It's like a code
for what they really wanna say.
7
00:01:09,771 --> 00:01:12,406
Like the doctor
who first told me my son was
autistic.
8
00:01:12,507 --> 00:01:15,208
You know, he says to me,
he says, "You know, the
autistic mind
9
00:01:15,309 --> 00:01:19,781
is wired in brilliant
and revolutionary ways."
10
00:01:19,881 --> 00:01:22,316
I said, "Oh, yeah?
11
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:23,918
How so?"
12
00:01:24,018 --> 00:01:26,286
Because, you know, my son
didn't speak.
13
00:01:26,386 --> 00:01:28,957
Didn't speak at all for years.
14
00:01:29,057 --> 00:01:31,291
Communicated only in grunts,
growls
15
00:01:31,391 --> 00:01:33,528
and ear-piercing screams.
16
00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:43,905
And then when he finally
started speaking, he wouldn't
shut up.
17
00:01:44,005 --> 00:01:47,274
- It's true. He wouldn't. He
wouldn't.
18
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:50,110
That doctor could've saved us
both a lot of time
if he'd just said the truth.
19
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:52,814
Just slap those bitches,
and show 'em who's boss!
20
00:01:52,914 --> 00:01:55,817
-Ezra!
-Autistic kids don't give a
fuck, man.
21
00:01:55,917 --> 00:01:59,587
- Say my name! Say my name!
- They don't. They don't.
22
00:02:08,096 --> 00:02:09,296
You look good.
23
00:02:10,263 --> 00:02:11,833
How's work?
24
00:02:11,933 --> 00:02:12,834
Good.
25
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:15,770
When did Ezra see Breaking Bad?
26
00:02:15,870 --> 00:02:17,572
We binged it last weekend.
27
00:02:20,608 --> 00:02:22,877
-Maybe we should be a little
more careful.
-What-- what do you mean?
28
00:02:22,977 --> 00:02:24,946
He's been reading
the New York Times since he was
five.
29
00:02:25,046 --> 00:02:26,446
He can handle Walter White.
30
00:02:26,547 --> 00:02:28,816
- Thank you for coming in.
-Hi!
31
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:31,251
-Hi, Jenna.
-Mrs. Lee, hi. Nice to see you.
32
00:02:31,351 --> 00:02:33,655
Max, you both know Dr. Tamarova.
33
00:02:33,755 --> 00:02:34,622
Mm-hmm.
34
00:02:36,256 --> 00:02:38,158
Ezra, please stay with Anthony.
35
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:40,394
Hi, hi, Ms. Cathro.
36
00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:41,763
Uh, what-- what's happening?
37
00:02:41,863 --> 00:02:43,765
Why is Ezra
not with the rest of the class?
38
00:02:43,865 --> 00:02:45,432
He's really been acting out
today.
39
00:02:45,533 --> 00:02:47,068
I have other students
who want to learn,
40
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,503
who count on me
to keep them safe.
41
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,370
-I'm getting so tired of this
shit.
-Max, please.
42
00:02:50,470 --> 00:02:52,640
No, you know
that he's bullied here, right?
43
00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:55,677
Yeah, maybe he was trying
to make that vicious little kid
laugh.
44
00:02:55,777 --> 00:02:57,845
Ezzie came home
with a bloody lip last week.
45
00:02:57,945 --> 00:02:59,246
Anybody get expelled for that?
46
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:00,480
Spoke to that boy's parents as
well.
47
00:03:00,581 --> 00:03:01,883
Right, but Ezzie's the bad one.
48
00:03:01,983 --> 00:03:03,383
No, no, Ezra is not
bad,
49
00:03:03,483 --> 00:03:05,853
but today,
he was a danger to himself and
others.
50
00:03:05,953 --> 00:03:08,122
There it is, there it is.
The secret language.
51
00:03:08,221 --> 00:03:09,824
- I was waiting for it.
- Max.
52
00:03:09,924 --> 00:03:11,626
-Huh?
-Max! Stop.
53
00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:19,701
You can't expel him.
He's been working very, very
hard.
54
00:03:19,801 --> 00:03:21,736
And, yes, he has had his bad
days,
55
00:03:21,836 --> 00:03:24,739
but he's also met a lot of the
goals
56
00:03:24,839 --> 00:03:26,206
that you set for him.
57
00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:28,375
Ms. Lee, please.
58
00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:30,812
Y-You can't drop him.
59
00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:33,815
Max, this autism shit,
it's depressing.
60
00:03:33,915 --> 00:03:35,516
You can talk
about whatever you want
61
00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:36,951
if you give us a reason to want
to listen.
62
00:03:37,051 --> 00:03:39,654
And I want to listen.
I think my cousin's autistic.
63
00:03:39,754 --> 00:03:42,590
- But it's gotta be funny.
- -See, the sign says comedy on it.
64
00:03:42,690 --> 00:03:44,559
- It's not a funeral parlor.
- Huh.
65
00:03:44,659 --> 00:03:45,960
What is this, a fucking
intervention?
66
00:03:46,060 --> 00:03:49,130
I disagree.
You need to go deeper, further.
67
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,430
Make a whole set out of it.
68
00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:51,666
Well, make a whole evening out
of it.
69
00:03:51,766 --> 00:03:53,634
You know, "Disabilities with
Max."
70
00:03:53,735 --> 00:03:55,536
Well, I'm not telling jokes.
I'm storytelling.
71
00:03:55,636 --> 00:03:57,337
I know you're not,
but you gotta make it funny.
72
00:03:57,437 --> 00:03:59,574
Sad stories, Jackie,
you should see his sad stories.
73
00:03:59,674 --> 00:04:01,008
Oh, I've seen 'em
plenty.
74
00:04:01,109 --> 00:04:02,210
Divorce is not for
pussies.
75
00:04:02,309 --> 00:04:03,845
Nosy, dark, and sexy.
76
00:04:03,945 --> 00:04:05,513
Sorry to interrupt,
I just wanted to tell you
77
00:04:05,613 --> 00:04:07,347
- I loved your set.
- There you go.
78
00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:09,316
- Thank you.
- You're welcome. I'm Susan.
79
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:10,651
Can I buy you a drink?
80
00:04:10,752 --> 00:04:12,887
I'd save the dough.
This guy is in mourning.
81
00:04:19,794 --> 00:04:21,596
Hey.
82
00:04:21,696 --> 00:04:23,998
-Are you crying?
-Ah, come on.
83
00:04:27,235 --> 00:04:28,335
I'll call you.
84
00:04:29,604 --> 00:04:30,505
Really?
85
00:04:31,906 --> 00:04:33,273
No.
86
00:04:46,521 --> 00:04:48,923
He cried, didn't he?
87
00:04:50,357 --> 00:04:52,994
It's his kid, my grandson.
88
00:04:56,898 --> 00:04:57,965
You hungry?
89
00:04:58,065 --> 00:04:59,432
Fix you something to eat.
90
00:05:08,408 --> 00:05:09,977
It's a bigger number
than we discussed,
91
00:05:10,077 --> 00:05:13,514
but it's exactly the
neighborhood
that you wanted.
92
00:05:13,614 --> 00:05:15,348
Listen, th-there are multiple
bids,
93
00:05:15,448 --> 00:05:17,718
so I think we have to come in
above the ask.
94
00:05:18,820 --> 00:05:22,023
I wish that wasn't the case,
but, unfortunately,
95
00:05:22,123 --> 00:05:23,558
it's still a seller's market.
96
00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:26,694
Ezra! Breakfast!
97
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:49,617
-Where'd you get the shirt?
-Come on. Cut it out. It's not
your shirt.
98
00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:51,853
-You sure it's not my shirt?
-I'm sure.
99
00:05:55,189 --> 00:05:58,292
Enrico moved to the Ritz.
100
00:05:58,391 --> 00:06:00,460
And my building is still
a union house,
101
00:06:00,561 --> 00:06:01,896
and there's an opening now,
so...
102
00:06:01,996 --> 00:06:04,198
-Yeah?
-...I want you to consider that.
103
00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:05,600
Yeah, okay.
104
00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:07,335
I'm just not gonna be a
doorman, Pop,
thank you.
105
00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:09,070
There's nothing wrong
with being a doorman.
106
00:06:09,170 --> 00:06:11,973
And a man your age
shouldn't be living with his
father.
107
00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:17,044
They're expelling him. They
expelled Ez.
108
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,813
They want me to put him
in a special needs school.
109
00:06:18,913 --> 00:06:21,749
Nah, none of it's special.
It's all bullshit.
110
00:06:21,849 --> 00:06:23,885
Yeah, there it is,
they're recommending drugs.
111
00:06:26,954 --> 00:06:29,223
Put him in a gym,
let him work off that special
sauce.
112
00:06:29,323 --> 00:06:31,092
-Yeah.
-But you gotta keep fighting.
113
00:06:31,192 --> 00:06:33,493
Yeah, keep fighting, right.
You know how much that's
costing me?
114
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:34,929
I'm paying for her lawyer, my
lawyer.
115
00:06:35,029 --> 00:06:36,864
Jenna knows I'm broke.
Can I have a fork, please?
116
00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:39,033
She knows you're still not over
her, too.
That's one thing.
117
00:06:39,133 --> 00:06:41,936
Just cut it out already, all
right?
Give me a break. Come on.
118
00:06:42,036 --> 00:06:44,238
Okay, who cries after fucking a
stranger?
119
00:06:44,338 --> 00:06:46,841
That's crazy. You gotta move
on, kiddo.
120
00:06:46,941 --> 00:06:48,876
Believe me, I know what it's
like
to fuck things up with a woman
121
00:06:48,976 --> 00:06:51,112
and to get stuck with a kid on
top of it.
122
00:06:51,212 --> 00:06:53,514
More coffee?
123
00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,482
Yeah, what, am I new here?
I'll take a coffee.
124
00:06:58,853 --> 00:07:00,788
Tell me something good, Jayne.
125
00:07:00,888 --> 00:07:03,391
I have something really, really
good.
126
00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:05,425
I'm not doing it. Nah, I write
for me now.
127
00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:06,861
-Come here.
-For me.
128
00:07:06,961 --> 00:07:08,095
Come here.
129
00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:09,496
I'm not sitting on your lap.
130
00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:10,798
I got something to tell you.
131
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:12,333
Come on.
132
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:13,935
You don't want me to get up.
133
00:07:14,035 --> 00:07:17,238
All right, no one's gonna
hire me in late night anymore.
134
00:07:17,338 --> 00:07:19,273
Conan fucking blackballed me.
135
00:07:19,373 --> 00:07:21,375
Well, you punched him in the
balls.
136
00:07:21,474 --> 00:07:23,077
Well, I was aiming for his
stomach.
137
00:07:23,177 --> 00:07:24,645
He's so fucking tall!
138
00:07:27,315 --> 00:07:29,016
Why are you so crazy?
139
00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:32,853
Listen, Robert Segal
has heard great things about
you.
140
00:07:32,954 --> 00:07:35,122
Robert Segal. What, Kimmel's
booker?
141
00:07:35,222 --> 00:07:37,658
He wants to see you
down at the Cellar tonight.
142
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:39,492
No, I can't. I can't do it
tonight.
143
00:07:39,593 --> 00:07:41,362
I'm taking Ezzie
to The Big Lebowski tribute.
144
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,898
We're gonna dress up like the
characters,
throw shit at the screen.
145
00:07:43,998 --> 00:07:46,567
-It's gonna be awesome.
-That's all cute, but not
tonight.
146
00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:47,935
I can't. I can't let the dude
down.
147
00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:50,504
You wanna do something for your
son?
148
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:54,008
You get Mr. Segal
to book you on Mr. Kimmel.
149
00:07:54,108 --> 00:07:57,078
Okay, ready?
I'm getting the costume.
150
00:07:57,178 --> 00:07:58,079
Okay.
151
00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:00,715
Okay, this is cozy.
152
00:08:04,418 --> 00:08:06,921
-This is gonna be itchy.
-I know.
153
00:08:07,021 --> 00:08:08,022
Okay.
154
00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:12,159
-Okay.
-Wait, not now, I got it.
155
00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:15,563
I got it.
156
00:08:15,663 --> 00:08:18,599
You look so cute!
157
00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:21,569
- I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm
sorry!
158
00:08:21,669 --> 00:08:24,839
It's okay. Sorry. It's okay.
159
00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:27,274
I'm sorry, Ezzie. It's okay.
160
00:08:27,375 --> 00:08:29,143
It's okay. It's okay.
161
00:08:30,444 --> 00:08:31,579
It's okay.
162
00:08:56,237 --> 00:08:57,605
I got it, honey.
163
00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:00,341
Wow, look at you.
164
00:09:00,441 --> 00:09:03,512
-So, a lawyer walks into a bar--
-No, no. Don't do that, Bryce.
165
00:09:03,611 --> 00:09:05,780
-It's Bruce.
-Ezzie! Ezzie!
166
00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:07,681
And you're "Hay-zeus," the
bowler, right?
167
00:09:07,782 --> 00:09:09,650
It's "Jesus," man.
168
00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:10,985
-Jesus.
-Have you not seen the movie?
169
00:09:11,085 --> 00:09:13,554
No, it's been a-- oh!
And here's the Big Lebowski!
170
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:15,990
I'm not Mr. Lebowski.
You're Mr. Lebowski.
171
00:09:16,090 --> 00:09:16,891
I'm The Dude.
172
00:09:16,991 --> 00:09:18,559
Well, not yet you're not.
173
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:20,227
Let's see.
174
00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:22,029
Now you're The Dude.
175
00:09:22,129 --> 00:09:24,465
Let me see.
176
00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:25,900
Just in case.
177
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,537
Okay, he's with me.
He's not gonna have a meltdown.
178
00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,905
Sure. Well,
we'll be back by 9:00,
179
00:09:31,005 --> 00:09:32,706
so just the movie
and straight home.
180
00:09:32,807 --> 00:09:34,408
-Promise?
-Yeah, I promise.
181
00:09:34,509 --> 00:09:35,576
-Okay!
-Okay.
182
00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:37,478
Okay.
183
00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:39,914
-Straight home, guys.
-Yeah. You, too. Okay?
184
00:09:40,014 --> 00:09:41,782
- Have fun!
- All right.
185
00:09:41,882 --> 00:09:43,117
He didn't like my joke.
186
00:09:54,395 --> 00:09:55,663
You're nice.
187
00:09:55,763 --> 00:09:57,532
What's up, buddy?
188
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:58,999
Jack-Jack-Jacquelyn.
189
00:09:59,100 --> 00:10:01,135
-What's up, Max?
-I'm gonna go get changed.
190
00:10:01,235 --> 00:10:02,937
-Hey, Ezra.
-Hi.
191
00:10:03,037 --> 00:10:05,139
Have you been
to a costume ball, then, love?
192
00:10:05,239 --> 00:10:07,475
No. Big Lebowski, 7:00 p.m.
show.
193
00:10:07,576 --> 00:10:09,443
Oh! Great movie. Love it.
194
00:10:09,544 --> 00:10:11,546
I'll have a White Russian.
195
00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:14,849
Virgin White Russian for The
Dude.
196
00:10:14,949 --> 00:10:17,618
Actually, pineapple juice.
I'll have a pineapple juice.
197
00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:28,229
-You make me think of pirates.
-Really? That's weird.
198
00:10:28,329 --> 00:10:29,263
Yes.
199
00:10:29,363 --> 00:10:32,299
Even though the pirate accent
200
00:10:32,399 --> 00:10:34,401
is typically West Country
English.
201
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:36,237
Yaarrgh!
202
00:10:36,337 --> 00:10:37,705
The Irish are fine pirates.
203
00:10:39,874 --> 00:10:42,743
Oh! Drop the lobe! Drop the
lobe.
204
00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:47,081
Max is stoned, everyone. Max is
stoned.
205
00:10:47,181 --> 00:10:48,015
Really, dude?
206
00:10:48,115 --> 00:10:49,016
I don't know if anyone's
207
00:10:49,116 --> 00:10:50,818
in an interracial relationship.
208
00:10:50,918 --> 00:10:52,853
I'm in one. My girlfriend's
Puerto Rican.
209
00:10:52,953 --> 00:10:55,122
- Yes! Thank you. I appreciate
that.
- See him?
210
00:10:55,222 --> 00:10:57,291
Okay, see the guy over there
with glasses?
211
00:10:57,391 --> 00:11:00,060
That's him.
Okay, I need my Ezzie mojo,
okay?
212
00:11:00,161 --> 00:11:01,962
You ready to be my good luck
charm?
213
00:11:03,565 --> 00:11:05,900
Find me a more unhappy human
being.
214
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,969
Depressing. Why would I do that?
215
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:11,138
Don't be so literal, Ezzie.
Come on, let's go.
216
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:14,041
Every time my dad
interacts with a gay person, he
calls me.
217
00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,110
Every interaction.
218
00:11:16,210 --> 00:11:18,179
It doesn't matter how small it
is.
He called me the other day.
219
00:11:18,279 --> 00:11:19,880
He was like,
"Emma, I was at the grocery
store,
220
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:22,049
and I looked over, and I saw a
lesbian."
221
00:11:22,750 --> 00:11:25,386
And I was like, "That's great,
dad. How did you know she was a
lesbian?"
222
00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:28,222
He said "Well, she looked like
you."
"Goodbye, Pop!"
223
00:11:28,322 --> 00:11:30,858
- Okay, guys, ready for your
next comic?
224
00:11:30,958 --> 00:11:33,394
Gimme the mojo.
Gimme the mojo! Gimme the mojo!
225
00:11:33,494 --> 00:11:35,196
One of my personal favorites.
226
00:11:35,296 --> 00:11:37,666
He was a writer for some
of the biggest names in the
business.
227
00:11:37,765 --> 00:11:38,933
Now he writes for himself.
228
00:11:39,033 --> 00:11:40,602
Clap it up for my buddy, Max
Bernal!
229
00:11:40,701 --> 00:11:41,603
Let him hear ya!
230
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:43,837
Yes!
231
00:11:46,641 --> 00:11:49,476
- That's Emma Willmann! Give it
up!
232
00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:53,113
- How we feeling?
- Good.
233
00:11:53,214 --> 00:11:55,382
- Now, take it easy. I don't
really care.
234
00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:59,119
My son is here tonight!
That's right. My son is here
tonight.
235
00:12:00,955 --> 00:12:02,524
Dying of shame.
236
00:12:02,624 --> 00:12:04,258
Stand up, and take the wig off,
Ez!
237
00:12:04,358 --> 00:12:08,028
Stop talking about me!
238
00:12:08,128 --> 00:12:10,565
Okay. I didn't expect that.
Uh, you know,
239
00:12:10,665 --> 00:12:12,132
try to have a little respect,
okay, Ez?
240
00:12:12,233 --> 00:12:14,835
I'm up here humiliating myself
to give you a better life.
241
00:12:14,935 --> 00:12:17,004
All right.
242
00:12:17,104 --> 00:12:18,707
I'm good to you, you little
prick.
243
00:12:18,806 --> 00:12:20,774
-Not like my old man.
-Pop-Pop!
244
00:12:20,874 --> 00:12:22,910
That's right. Pop-Pop.
245
00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:25,012
That's the last time
he'll speak, by the way.
246
00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:28,115
Pop-Pop, that's actually
the perfect name for my old man.
247
00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:30,884
Pop-Pop. It's like two gunshots.
248
00:12:30,985 --> 00:12:33,454
One to the head,
one to the heart. "Pop! Pop!"
249
00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:35,590
Let me tell you a little bit
about my old man.
250
00:12:35,690 --> 00:12:38,792
This guy, you know, he was a--
one of the top gourmet chefs
251
00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:40,461
in New York City back in the
day.
252
00:12:40,562 --> 00:12:43,230
Worked at all the top
restaurants.
It's true, you know.
253
00:12:43,330 --> 00:12:45,667
Every one of which he got
shit-canned from
254
00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:47,702
because nobody
could stand working with him.
255
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:49,436
I mean, the guy got driven out
of town,
256
00:12:49,537 --> 00:12:52,072
and the only place
he could find a job as a chef
257
00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:54,709
was at a steakhouse in Nebraska.
258
00:12:54,808 --> 00:12:56,678
- Ooh!
- That's right.
259
00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:59,880
You know cuisine in Nebraska,
man.
260
00:12:59,980 --> 00:13:01,683
There isn't any.
261
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:06,787
I mean, you kill it, they grill
it,
you get a Michelin tire, see?
262
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:09,290
So, I'm five years old,
I'm living in Nebraska,
263
00:13:09,390 --> 00:13:12,126
it's my birthday party,
and you know, it's a lot of
pressure.
264
00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:14,895
I mean, you know, I've got
these fat farmers' kids staring
at me.
265
00:13:14,995 --> 00:13:18,767
I'm the only thing standing
between them and the cake, so,
you know...
266
00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:22,970
Papier-mâché bib, it's 1980,
so you know everything I'm
wearing
267
00:13:23,070 --> 00:13:24,506
is made out of napalm.
268
00:13:24,606 --> 00:13:27,207
I bend down, blow out my
candles,
269
00:13:27,308 --> 00:13:29,176
I'm about to do it when I hear
my pop say,
270
00:13:29,276 --> 00:13:31,579
"Blow out your fucking candles,
Max!"
271
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:36,116
I flinch. I fall forward.
272
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:39,086
Candle lights me up.
I light up like a fucking road
flare.
273
00:13:39,186 --> 00:13:41,656
I'm telling you, I am on fire!
274
00:13:41,756 --> 00:13:44,191
My old man,
he grabs his Dr. Pepper,
275
00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:46,393
he puts me out like a
campfire, and says,
276
00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:49,930
"You want some cake, Maxie?"
277
00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:51,398
I says, "No, Pop.
278
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,434
-I want my eyebrows back!"
-I want my eyebrows back!
279
00:13:55,969 --> 00:13:57,639
Thanks, kid.
280
00:13:57,739 --> 00:13:59,473
I'm gonna go kill my son.
281
00:13:59,574 --> 00:14:02,476
Hey, I think it's great
that you memorized my set,
282
00:14:02,577 --> 00:14:04,311
but you can't be steppin'
on my punchline, buddy.
283
00:14:04,411 --> 00:14:06,914
I can't let the train go off
the rails!
284
00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:09,584
Okay, Ez, here comes Mr. Happy
now.
285
00:14:09,684 --> 00:14:13,487
Okay, just whatever you're
thinking,
don't say it, okay, please.
286
00:14:13,588 --> 00:14:14,888
-Good set.
-Thank you.
287
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:16,990
-I think I'll book your kid.
-Ha!
288
00:14:17,091 --> 00:14:18,526
You're still not funny, Bob.
289
00:14:18,626 --> 00:14:21,796
Ezzie, meet Mr. Segal.
Bob, this is my son, Ezra.
290
00:14:21,895 --> 00:14:24,231
So, um, next week, a producer
comes in
291
00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:26,735
-to see you and Sal Argento.
-All right.
292
00:14:26,835 --> 00:14:29,903
And then, one of you is doing
the Kimmel show in Los Angeles.
293
00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:33,173
Mr. Segal, are you sad
because you're bald?
294
00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:35,976
-He's dark.
-Mm.
295
00:14:36,076 --> 00:14:38,178
Like his daddy.
296
00:14:38,278 --> 00:14:40,214
-Get your best stuff together,
Max.
-Okay.
297
00:14:40,314 --> 00:14:42,784
-All right? You're gonna need
it.
-All right. All right.
298
00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:47,655
Sad and bald? That's you not
talking?
299
00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:50,357
- I was just asking a question.
- -Okay.
300
00:14:50,457 --> 00:14:53,561
Come on, let's get out of here
before your mother kills me.
301
00:14:53,661 --> 00:14:55,429
Sorry. Sorry.
302
00:15:01,736 --> 00:15:02,604
Well...
303
00:15:08,142 --> 00:15:10,411
Oh, my god.
304
00:15:10,512 --> 00:15:12,112
Okay.
305
00:15:12,212 --> 00:15:14,248
Snug as a bug in a rug.
306
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:20,588
Okay. All right, all right.
307
00:15:20,688 --> 00:15:22,022
I wasn't doing anything.
308
00:15:24,826 --> 00:15:27,562
Hey. We had a good time, right?
309
00:15:27,662 --> 00:15:29,430
Just one more.
310
00:15:29,531 --> 00:15:32,667
All right, all right! Hey. I
love you.
311
00:15:34,368 --> 00:15:35,637
Good night.
312
00:15:41,175 --> 00:15:43,177
Who says autistic kids can't
communicate?
313
00:15:43,277 --> 00:15:46,346
"Ah, get out of my room!"
And I'm out. Yeah.
314
00:15:46,447 --> 00:15:48,415
He's the best communicator in
the world.
315
00:15:48,516 --> 00:15:50,384
You can use the sensory brush
next time.
316
00:15:50,484 --> 00:15:52,687
Nah, nah, nah,
the brushing thing is your
thing.
317
00:15:52,787 --> 00:15:54,421
What is he, an alpaca?
318
00:15:54,522 --> 00:15:57,191
You did a set at the Cellar,
and you promised me you
wouldn't.
319
00:15:57,291 --> 00:15:59,226
-You're driving me crazy.
-I'm sorry, okay?
320
00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:01,228
A guy from Kimmel came to see
me,
321
00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:04,298
-and I needed my good luck
charm, right?
-Oh.
322
00:16:04,398 --> 00:16:06,366
You know me. I needed my mojo
man.
323
00:16:06,467 --> 00:16:09,069
Did you read Dr. Tamarova's
assessment?
324
00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:14,341
Look at you. You are so pretty.
Come on. Give me a kiss.
325
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:15,976
-Brad's gone already.
-Stop it.
326
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:18,278
It's Bruce, and he's in the
kitchen.
327
00:16:19,881 --> 00:16:22,282
- Brian is in my kitchen?
- Hi, Max!
328
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:24,218
You know, he's never gonna
belong in our house.
329
00:16:24,318 --> 00:16:26,487
Max. This is my house. Did you
read it?
330
00:16:26,588 --> 00:16:28,723
Yeah, I read it. I read
it, yes.
331
00:16:28,823 --> 00:16:30,859
But it was a mugging.
They just want him out of there.
332
00:16:30,959 --> 00:16:33,695
The Board of Ed will pay for him
to go to a special needs school.
333
00:16:33,795 --> 00:16:35,229
He doesn't need a special
school.
334
00:16:35,329 --> 00:16:37,799
Max, he led 20 kids
onto Washington Street.
335
00:16:37,899 --> 00:16:40,635
-It was incredibly dangerous.
-Okay, but he's not dangerous.
336
00:16:40,735 --> 00:16:41,970
He's a challenge.
337
00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,071
Fuck. Nobody wants to do the
fucking work.
338
00:16:44,171 --> 00:16:46,841
The work? The work. All I do is
work.
339
00:16:46,941 --> 00:16:49,577
You come here, you play dress up
to take him to comedy club.
340
00:16:49,677 --> 00:16:51,880
-Bring him home at midnight.
-That's not what I meant, okay?
341
00:16:51,980 --> 00:16:53,113
Look, we're on the same team,
Jen.
342
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:56,116
You know how he thinks.
I know how he thinks.
343
00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:58,151
He just needs to be seen, Jen,
you know?
344
00:16:58,252 --> 00:17:02,356
And heard and-- and appreciated
for what he has to offer.
345
00:17:02,456 --> 00:17:05,025
Yes, yes, but he also needs
to be able to give us a hug
346
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:06,293
without screaming.
347
00:17:09,129 --> 00:17:10,397
It's an opportunity, Max.
348
00:17:10,497 --> 00:17:13,968
He'll be with trained teachers
and aides
349
00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:15,235
in a school built for
him,
350
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:17,137
how he needs to learn.
351
00:17:18,472 --> 00:17:19,807
No bullies.
352
00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:23,277
He'll be with kids just like
him.
353
00:17:26,179 --> 00:17:28,616
-Nice. Kids like him, huh?
-Okay.
354
00:17:28,716 --> 00:17:31,451
-That's not what I meant.
-You know what? I know what you
meant.
355
00:17:31,553 --> 00:17:34,022
Here's the thing, I'm a kid
like him.
356
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:37,491
And kids like us, you know what
we need?
To be with all kinds of kids.
357
00:17:37,592 --> 00:17:40,895
So, no, I will not accept
her recommendation fucking ever.
358
00:17:53,508 --> 00:17:55,677
- You all right?
- No.
359
00:17:57,077 --> 00:17:58,445
It never fails!
360
00:17:58,546 --> 00:17:59,881
Every time we get close to
something
361
00:17:59,981 --> 00:18:01,015
that might actually work,
362
00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:02,750
Max has to blow it up!
363
00:18:02,850 --> 00:18:05,385
This is the third school
that Ezra's been expelled from.
364
00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:09,057
There's no other options.
What am I supposed to do?
365
00:18:09,156 --> 00:18:11,559
Well,
I could get rid of Max for you.
366
00:18:11,659 --> 00:18:13,861
- Oh, you can do that
for me?
- Yeah. I'm a lawyer.
367
00:18:13,962 --> 00:18:15,329
I have no moral compass.
368
00:18:15,429 --> 00:18:19,466
Besides, I know a guy.
They call him Jimmy the Hatchet.
369
00:18:19,567 --> 00:18:23,236
Bang, bang, bitches. Cut off
his head,
and feed him to the fishes!
370
00:18:36,383 --> 00:18:39,921
Get down! Get down!
371
00:18:51,532 --> 00:18:53,133
It won't be
too much longer, sweetie,
372
00:18:53,233 --> 00:18:55,737
but you scared the hell out of
me.
373
00:18:58,740 --> 00:19:01,375
Honey, why'd you sneak out
of the house like that?
374
00:19:01,475 --> 00:19:04,378
Hmm? Please don't do that ever.
375
00:19:05,212 --> 00:19:09,249
-Say you'll never do that.
-I won't ever do that.
376
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:11,586
Miss Demuzio saw you run in the
street,
377
00:19:11,686 --> 00:19:13,955
and then a taxi came out
and then he hit you.
378
00:19:14,055 --> 00:19:16,024
-I mean, you could've been--
-A dog tried to bite me.
379
00:19:16,124 --> 00:19:18,225
I had to get away from his
teeth.
380
00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:20,494
Hey, Jen. They're almost ready
for him.
381
00:19:20,595 --> 00:19:22,162
No!
382
00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:24,264
- It's okay.
- Hey.
383
00:19:24,364 --> 00:19:27,135
-Hey. Dad's here.
-What's happening?
384
00:19:27,234 --> 00:19:29,070
Hey, buddy. Hey, hey. You okay?
385
00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:32,339
What's going on? Huh? What
happened?
386
00:19:32,439 --> 00:19:35,342
-14th Street Viaduct to
Manhattan Avenue.
-What?
387
00:19:35,442 --> 00:19:37,578
-Three blocks to the park at--
-Hey, hey, I know--
388
00:19:37,679 --> 00:19:39,714
-I know you know where Pop-Pop
lives.
-I'm sorry.
389
00:19:39,814 --> 00:19:42,382
Don't be sorry, okay? Just tell
me what--
390
00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:43,918
-You're mad.
-No, I'm not mad.
391
00:19:44,018 --> 00:19:45,318
Okay, I'm not mad--
392
00:19:45,419 --> 00:19:47,155
Okay, you know what?
Yeah, I'm a little bit mad.
393
00:19:47,254 --> 00:19:49,157
Eyes. Eyes. Ezzie.
394
00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:52,259
-What were you doing running
outs--
-Can I talk to you for a second?
395
00:19:54,796 --> 00:19:55,863
Hey--
396
00:19:59,767 --> 00:20:01,401
Ezra Bernal.
397
00:20:01,502 --> 00:20:03,805
-Why's he in the middle of the
hallway?
-They need to run tests.
398
00:20:03,905 --> 00:20:06,339
What do you mean tests?
What tests? You mean like
X-rays?
399
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,042
-Psych evaluation.
-What do you mean psych eval--
400
00:20:08,142 --> 00:20:10,878
- Hey, where you going? Hey, no,
thanks.
401
00:20:10,978 --> 00:20:12,914
-I had the same reaction.
-What psych evaluation?
402
00:20:13,014 --> 00:20:15,083
-He got hit by a cab.
-It's protocol for children.
403
00:20:15,183 --> 00:20:18,052
-Excuse me. Is there a problem?
-Yeah. We need to see a doctor,
please.
404
00:20:18,152 --> 00:20:21,622
-I'm Dr. Kaplan.
-Oh, okay. We-- hey, stop!
405
00:20:21,723 --> 00:20:23,591
Sir, you need to let the man do
his job.
406
00:20:23,691 --> 00:20:25,693
Yes. Let's just relax. Just--
407
00:20:25,793 --> 00:20:27,695
-Dad?
-Yeah, I'm right here, buddy.
408
00:20:27,795 --> 00:20:29,362
- We're here, honey.
- Don't worry.
409
00:20:29,463 --> 00:20:31,032
We're gonna sort this out
in a minute, okay?
410
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:51,384
They made me draw pictures,
411
00:20:51,485 --> 00:20:55,422
stuck lights in my eyes
and asked me questions.
412
00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:58,358
What kind of questions?
413
00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:03,064
They asked me if Mom or Dad
ever tried to hit me.
414
00:21:03,164 --> 00:21:05,365
If I had ever tried to hurt
myself.
415
00:21:07,168 --> 00:21:09,771
Okay, I'm sorry
they asked you that kind of
stuff.
416
00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:15,810
Are they gonna make me live
417
00:21:15,910 --> 00:21:17,277
somewhere else?
418
00:21:18,246 --> 00:21:20,615
-Like in a hospital?
-No.
419
00:21:20,715 --> 00:21:22,250
They can't.
420
00:21:22,349 --> 00:21:25,653
You have family,
and they have to answer to us.
421
00:21:25,753 --> 00:21:29,724
-So, that's not gonna happen.
-Okay.
422
00:21:29,824 --> 00:21:31,159
Next move.
423
00:21:31,259 --> 00:21:33,528
-You sure you want to do that?
-Oh, yeah.
424
00:21:34,327 --> 00:21:36,264
KO.
425
00:21:36,363 --> 00:21:39,066
You had to do that, didn't you,
huh?
426
00:21:42,335 --> 00:21:44,071
Hi.
427
00:21:44,172 --> 00:21:45,472
Thank you for your patience.
428
00:21:45,573 --> 00:21:47,909
I know it's been a long night.
429
00:21:48,009 --> 00:21:49,210
I have some good news.
430
00:21:49,309 --> 00:21:51,245
We are going to send Ezra home
this morning.
431
00:21:51,344 --> 00:21:53,581
But because of his age
432
00:21:53,681 --> 00:21:56,150
and because a witness
saw him run in front of a cab--
433
00:21:56,250 --> 00:21:57,450
That's bullshit.
434
00:21:57,552 --> 00:21:58,786
Please. Let him finish.
435
00:21:58,886 --> 00:22:00,922
Ezzie would never just
run in front of a cab.
436
00:22:01,022 --> 00:22:03,291
- Just listen to the doctor.
- -I know this is traumatic,
437
00:22:03,390 --> 00:22:05,425
but I'm doing what the law says
I must do.
438
00:22:05,526 --> 00:22:07,195
Ezra is technically a ward of
the state.
439
00:22:07,295 --> 00:22:10,097
-You don't have that right.
-Legally, he does actually.
440
00:22:10,198 --> 00:22:11,464
Let's just hear the doctor out.
441
00:22:11,566 --> 00:22:13,400
Ezra has a history
of fleeing
442
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:14,936
and putting himself
in danger.
443
00:22:15,036 --> 00:22:18,239
Now, I'm not going to put him
into a pediatric psych ward.
444
00:22:18,338 --> 00:22:22,577
But I am going to require him
to attend a school for special
needs.
445
00:22:22,677 --> 00:22:25,613
And I would like to try
a prescription for Risperdal.
446
00:22:26,948 --> 00:22:28,783
Risperdal? That's an
antipsychotic.
447
00:22:28,883 --> 00:22:31,519
-Your son has been a danger to
himself.
-He has not!
448
00:22:31,619 --> 00:22:34,322
Max! He nearly died! That
happened.
449
00:22:34,421 --> 00:22:35,957
Just let him finish. Let him
finish.
450
00:22:36,057 --> 00:22:38,659
We are going to
revisit this
in three months.
451
00:22:38,759 --> 00:22:41,929
But right now,
Risperdal is the correct
medication.
452
00:22:47,702 --> 00:22:49,770
- Max.
- No, no. I just--
453
00:22:49,871 --> 00:22:52,273
- You got a lot of Risperdal here.
- -Max.
454
00:22:52,372 --> 00:22:55,276
What do the drug companies
give you for pushing this on
kids?
455
00:22:55,375 --> 00:22:56,644
You get a free fucking badge?
456
00:22:56,744 --> 00:22:58,411
-Hey, Max, come on. Take it
easy.
-Take it easy.
457
00:22:58,512 --> 00:23:00,413
Now, I see where
the dangerous behavior comes
from.
458
00:23:00,514 --> 00:23:02,516
- Oh, excuse me?
- Max!
459
00:23:02,617 --> 00:23:03,985
You son of a bitch!
460
00:23:09,790 --> 00:23:11,759
- No. I'm not doing that.
- Max.
461
00:23:11,859 --> 00:23:13,426
I got Dr. Wells
to drop the assault charge,
462
00:23:13,527 --> 00:23:15,630
-but you gotta go with the
program.
-Fuck that guy.
463
00:23:15,730 --> 00:23:18,065
-He's a drug dealer.
-He's in control is what he is.
464
00:23:18,165 --> 00:23:21,869
Of the special ed school,
the medications, all of it.
465
00:23:24,272 --> 00:23:27,909
And what about the,
uh,
about the restraining order?
466
00:23:29,577 --> 00:23:32,747
Three months. You can't go near
Ezra.
467
00:23:32,847 --> 00:23:36,050
I'm sorry. It's the judge's
decision.
468
00:23:36,150 --> 00:23:39,287
I can probably get it down
to a month if you use the
behavior cards.
469
00:23:39,387 --> 00:23:41,822
Fuck those cards. He pisses on
those.
470
00:23:41,923 --> 00:23:45,293
You want to go home
or you wanna spend another
night in here?
471
00:23:45,393 --> 00:23:46,527
It's up to you.
472
00:24:01,409 --> 00:24:04,412
Must have been humiliating
being rescued by your wife's
boyfriend.
473
00:24:04,512 --> 00:24:06,247
Please stop talking.
474
00:24:06,347 --> 00:24:08,249
She's obsessed with this retard
crap.
475
00:24:08,349 --> 00:24:10,318
Hey, what's wrong with you, huh?
476
00:24:10,418 --> 00:24:14,487
Nobody says "retard" anymore,
okay?
Nobody. Don't say it again.
477
00:24:14,588 --> 00:24:16,090
Okay. I won't say it.
478
00:24:18,626 --> 00:24:20,194
You know, it's a felony having
this.
479
00:24:20,294 --> 00:24:21,562
That's a lot of bullshit.
480
00:24:21,662 --> 00:24:24,098
I served my country.
I have a right to have this.
481
00:24:24,198 --> 00:24:26,100
Food. You served food.
482
00:24:28,703 --> 00:24:32,239
I had no choice.
Now they're telling me I can't
see Ezra.
483
00:24:33,107 --> 00:24:36,043
I-- I got no say
in what drugs they're gonna
give him.
484
00:24:36,143 --> 00:24:38,379
What school they're gonna put
him in.
What the f--
485
00:24:44,185 --> 00:24:45,853
You got anything to say?
486
00:24:45,953 --> 00:24:49,757
-She cut you out good. I know.
-She didn't do this.
487
00:24:49,857 --> 00:24:51,559
She didn't have to.
I just picked you up from
prison.
488
00:24:51,659 --> 00:24:52,793
What are you talking about?
489
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:54,462
-That's the best you got?
-What am I gonna say?
490
00:24:54,562 --> 00:24:56,496
You rush in blind,
you get knocked on your ass.
491
00:24:56,597 --> 00:24:57,832
You can't control your own
power,
492
00:24:57,932 --> 00:24:59,000
then what the hell do you have?
Nothing.
493
00:24:59,100 --> 00:25:00,534
Says the guy who knocked out a
customer
494
00:25:00,634 --> 00:25:01,635
because his steak was
overcooked?
495
00:25:01,736 --> 00:25:02,837
That was a perfect steak.
496
00:25:02,937 --> 00:25:04,238
Ah, you see now, there it is.
497
00:25:04,472 --> 00:25:06,407
-There's my twisted
moral compass.
-That's right. Whatever.
498
00:25:06,507 --> 00:25:07,641
Whatever's right. Yeah.
499
00:25:07,842 --> 00:25:09,110
Maybe if that were true,
we'd still be in Nebraska,
500
00:25:09,210 --> 00:25:10,711
I'd still have a mother,
what do you think?
501
00:25:12,546 --> 00:25:13,848
What are you doing? What are
you doing?
502
00:25:13,948 --> 00:25:15,916
Stop.
503
00:25:16,017 --> 00:25:18,352
I'm sorry, all right?
504
00:25:18,452 --> 00:25:19,920
I just-- I didn't mean to bring
that up.
505
00:25:20,154 --> 00:25:22,623
Fucking guy says to me,
"Hey, stupid, there's no blood
on my plate."
506
00:25:22,723 --> 00:25:24,725
I say, "Hey, I'm sorry."
And I punch him in the face.
507
00:25:24,825 --> 00:25:26,193
I say, "Now there is blood on
your plate."
508
00:25:26,293 --> 00:25:28,195
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about my mother.
509
00:25:28,295 --> 00:25:30,197
Now what, now you're gonna
start blaming everything
510
00:25:30,297 --> 00:25:32,299
that's wrong with you and your
life
on me and your mother?
511
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:34,368
Get the fuck out of here!
512
00:25:34,468 --> 00:25:35,836
You know what? You're a fucking
asshole!
513
00:25:35,936 --> 00:25:38,406
Fuck you.
Learn how to fucking cook a
steak.
514
00:25:38,507 --> 00:25:40,775
Move the car!
515
00:25:42,276 --> 00:25:43,110
Got it?
516
00:25:50,284 --> 00:25:51,185
Good job.
517
00:25:57,058 --> 00:25:58,893
Do you really think you should
wear
the dinosaur costume
518
00:25:58,993 --> 00:26:00,895
on your first day at a new
school?
519
00:26:00,995 --> 00:26:01,929
Hmm.
520
00:26:03,297 --> 00:26:05,166
Hey, it's gonna be great.
521
00:26:05,266 --> 00:26:09,603
There's gonna be all these new
kids, and you're gonna find
the nicest ones.
522
00:26:13,707 --> 00:26:15,276
Hey, psst, Ezra.
523
00:26:16,310 --> 00:26:17,645
Ezzie.
524
00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:20,815
Ezzie.
525
00:26:49,610 --> 00:26:51,345
Okay, everybody.
Inside!
526
00:26:59,620 --> 00:27:01,689
You've got to head in, Ezra.
527
00:27:04,725 --> 00:27:07,628
What class do you have? Art?
528
00:27:14,101 --> 00:27:15,769
You know,
I was thinking about it
recently.
529
00:27:15,870 --> 00:27:17,938
This fucked-up game
we used to play when I was a
kid.
530
00:27:18,038 --> 00:27:19,874
You remember Musical Chairs?
531
00:27:19,974 --> 00:27:21,208
- Yeah!
- Yeah?
532
00:27:21,308 --> 00:27:23,944
- Whoo!
- Whoo! Really? Jesus Christ!
533
00:27:24,044 --> 00:27:26,981
It's like a roomful
of pharmaceutical executives.
534
00:27:27,081 --> 00:27:29,584
- You know, I was thinking about
this game.
535
00:27:29,683 --> 00:27:31,018
But you know what the catch is.
536
00:27:31,118 --> 00:27:34,589
If you got a dozen kids,
you only got 11 chairs.
537
00:27:34,688 --> 00:27:37,458
So, who doesn't get a chair,
538
00:27:37,559 --> 00:27:40,995
"Fuck you, you're out," right?
539
00:27:41,095 --> 00:27:43,063
Yeah, it's brutal, it's brutal.
540
00:27:43,164 --> 00:27:46,333
I mean, these kids,
they turn into savages, man,
right?
541
00:27:46,433 --> 00:27:49,837
They bite each other,
they kick each other.
542
00:27:49,937 --> 00:27:52,607
They poke each other's eyes out.
543
00:27:52,706 --> 00:27:54,675
What sadist invented this game?
544
00:27:56,043 --> 00:27:58,078
And why do they even call it
Musical Chairs?
545
00:27:58,179 --> 00:28:02,249
There's nothing remotely musical
about Musical Chairs, man.
546
00:28:02,349 --> 00:28:05,419
It's like, uh-- it's like the
original
Squid Game or something.
547
00:28:08,590 --> 00:28:11,425
You know, I just, uh--
I got out of prison a couple
days ago.
548
00:28:11,526 --> 00:28:12,693
It's a true story.
549
00:28:12,793 --> 00:28:14,094
Thank you. Thank you.
550
00:28:14,195 --> 00:28:17,264
You know, I, um, put in some
hard time.
551
00:28:17,364 --> 00:28:20,602
Toughest 14 hours of my life.
552
00:28:20,701 --> 00:28:22,303
But, um...
553
00:28:25,039 --> 00:28:27,741
yeah, this doctor, doctor.
554
00:28:27,841 --> 00:28:29,043
Fucking doctor.
555
00:28:29,143 --> 00:28:30,844
Tried to push some drugs
on my kid, so,
556
00:28:30,945 --> 00:28:32,413
you know,
I had to knock him out,
557
00:28:32,514 --> 00:28:34,114
and, uh, they threw me in jail.
558
00:28:36,784 --> 00:28:38,919
Uh, but they offered me a deal.
559
00:28:41,488 --> 00:28:43,123
If I let them give my son
560
00:28:43,224 --> 00:28:46,927
the same drugs
they give to the criminally
insane,
561
00:28:47,027 --> 00:28:49,330
they'd drop all the charges.
562
00:28:51,533 --> 00:28:53,400
So I, uh...
563
00:28:56,303 --> 00:28:57,171
took the deal.
564
00:28:59,940 --> 00:29:02,176
My son needed me to go to bat
for him...
565
00:29:09,350 --> 00:29:11,752
and I sold him right the fuck
out.
566
00:29:20,729 --> 00:29:23,297
Where are you?What are you doing? You have aspot.
567
00:29:23,397 --> 00:29:25,399
- You need to get back here.
- I'm not coming back.
568
00:29:25,499 --> 00:29:30,572
Listen, Max,
I really, really want you to
fly.
569
00:29:30,672 --> 00:29:32,373
Really high. I really do.
570
00:29:32,473 --> 00:29:35,442
But you have got
to stop bombing the runway.
571
00:29:35,543 --> 00:29:37,679
You know the bit I did
about the meds and Ez,
572
00:29:37,778 --> 00:29:39,246
it's all true, right?
573
00:29:39,346 --> 00:29:41,949
Okay, fine. Then come back and
tell them.
574
00:29:42,049 --> 00:29:44,151
But you gotta come back here.
575
00:29:44,251 --> 00:29:46,887
And they'll understand.
Listen, Kimmel loves kids.
576
00:29:48,322 --> 00:29:49,156
So do I.
577
00:30:04,405 --> 00:30:07,408
Shhh.
578
00:30:08,075 --> 00:30:11,445
Hey, remember when we did
that drill down the fire escape?
579
00:30:15,382 --> 00:30:16,450
You wanna do it again?
580
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:20,888
Okay.
581
00:30:20,988 --> 00:30:22,456
You gotta trust me, buddy.
582
00:30:24,158 --> 00:30:26,226
Oh, yeah, I got a nice bed
for you back here, Ez, huh?
583
00:30:26,327 --> 00:30:28,429
You got your Star Wars pillow.
I got snacks.
584
00:30:28,530 --> 00:30:29,798
This is gonna be fun!
585
00:30:30,532 --> 00:30:33,434
Hey. What are you doing?
What are you doing?
586
00:30:33,535 --> 00:30:35,202
Don't worry about it.
Go back in the house.
587
00:30:35,302 --> 00:30:37,071
- What do you mean?
- Don't worry about it.
588
00:30:37,171 --> 00:30:38,506
You're not taking the car.
589
00:30:38,906 --> 00:30:40,642
-Just having a little
father-son time.
-You're not taking the car.
590
00:30:40,742 --> 00:30:42,910
- It's a Thrilla in Manila!
- We're not fighting, Ezra.
591
00:30:43,010 --> 00:30:44,211
We're not fighting, just
talking.
592
00:30:44,311 --> 00:30:46,213
Frazier whipping the
mighty Ali!
593
00:30:46,313 --> 00:30:48,650
There's a court order out
for you. Are you crazy?
What are you doing?
594
00:30:48,750 --> 00:30:51,218
Down goes Frazier!
Down goes Frazier!
595
00:30:51,318 --> 00:30:52,486
I gotta get him to bed.
596
00:30:52,587 --> 00:30:55,255
Get in the car, Ezra.
Hey, listen to me, okay?
597
00:30:55,356 --> 00:30:57,726
I saw him at that school,
I saw him on those drugs.
598
00:30:57,826 --> 00:30:59,728
They were killing him.
I need to get him away from
here.
599
00:30:59,828 --> 00:31:01,962
You're doing it wrong.
What the hell is the matter
with you?
600
00:31:02,062 --> 00:31:03,598
Pop, I swear to God, stop, okay?
Just stop.
601
00:31:03,698 --> 00:31:05,700
You told me to fight, I'm
fighting.
Let's get in the car, Ez.
602
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,868
You're not fighting, you're
running!
What are you doing?
603
00:31:07,968 --> 00:31:09,504
I'm not running. Ezra, get in
the car!
604
00:31:09,604 --> 00:31:10,904
Okay. It's okay.
605
00:31:11,004 --> 00:31:12,239
-I got some waffles for you.
-No.
606
00:31:12,339 --> 00:31:14,341
There's no waffles. Ez, get in
the car.
607
00:31:14,441 --> 00:31:16,910
- You want fresh whipped cream?
-Stop it, please.
608
00:31:17,010 --> 00:31:19,413
Listen, we're family.
We're the Rice Krispie boys.
609
00:31:19,514 --> 00:31:21,549
He's Snap, you're Crackle, and
who am I?
610
00:31:21,649 --> 00:31:22,916
- Pop-Pop!
- That's right!
611
00:31:23,016 --> 00:31:24,786
And we're not fighting,
we're just sparring.
612
00:31:24,885 --> 00:31:25,953
So show me what you got.
613
00:31:26,053 --> 00:31:27,756
That's it! And, and--
614
00:31:27,856 --> 00:31:30,725
- Oh!
- All right! Knock out!
615
00:31:30,825 --> 00:31:31,992
Good job. Come on, buddy.
616
00:31:32,092 --> 00:31:33,561
In the car. Come on. Let's go.
617
00:31:33,661 --> 00:31:36,463
- This is a mistake.
- Let's go. Okay. Says who?
618
00:31:36,831 --> 00:31:39,299
- Can Pop-Pop come?
- No, Pop-Pop can't come.
619
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,235
Pop-Pop's gonna hold the fort
down.
Right, Pop-Pop?
620
00:31:41,335 --> 00:31:43,470
-Where are you taking him?
-I'm going to Nick's in
Michigan.
621
00:31:43,571 --> 00:31:45,906
Oh, Jesus. That Greek prick.
Of all the fucking people--
622
00:31:46,006 --> 00:31:47,609
Stop it. He's my best
friend.
623
00:31:47,709 --> 00:31:48,843
That guy's a fucking thief!
624
00:31:48,942 --> 00:31:50,712
I take him into my house,
he steals from me.
625
00:31:50,812 --> 00:31:52,413
He didn't steal your saucepan.
626
00:31:52,514 --> 00:31:54,849
I'm not stealing your clothes.
Nobody's stealing anything,
okay?
627
00:31:54,948 --> 00:31:57,251
You're making a mistake.
You can't do this.
628
00:31:57,351 --> 00:31:59,621
You know what? Take this,
please.
Already have enough problems.
629
00:31:59,721 --> 00:32:01,188
-Thank you!
-This is crazy!
630
00:32:01,288 --> 00:32:02,824
- Say, "Bye, Pop-Pop!"
- Bye, Pop-Pop!
631
00:32:02,923 --> 00:32:04,057
Bye, Pop-Pop!
632
00:32:22,644 --> 00:32:24,144
What the fuck am I doing?
633
00:32:28,449 --> 00:32:30,718
♪ Sisyphus peeredInto the mist ♪
634
00:32:30,819 --> 00:32:34,455
♪ A stone's throwFrom the precipice, paused ♪
635
00:32:35,989 --> 00:32:37,391
♪ Did he jump or did he fall ♪
636
00:32:37,491 --> 00:32:40,227
♪ As he gazed into the mawOf the morning mist? ♪
637
00:32:40,327 --> 00:32:42,864
♪ Did he raise both fistsAnd say"To hell with this" ♪
638
00:32:42,963 --> 00:32:45,667
♪ And just let the rock roll? ♪
639
00:32:48,068 --> 00:32:49,871
♪ Let it roll ♪
640
00:32:49,970 --> 00:32:53,173
♪ Let it crash down low ♪
641
00:32:53,273 --> 00:32:57,311
♪ There's a house down thereBut I lost it long ago ♪
642
00:32:58,947 --> 00:33:02,282
Ezzie? Ezzie?
643
00:33:02,382 --> 00:33:03,551
Ezzie?
644
00:33:03,651 --> 00:33:05,118
Ezra?
645
00:33:05,219 --> 00:33:09,423
♪ See my house down thereBut I lost it long ago ♪
646
00:33:09,524 --> 00:33:10,424
Ezzie?
647
00:33:11,425 --> 00:33:13,728
Ezra? Ezra!
648
00:33:26,340 --> 00:33:28,576
- Did you get a good night's sleep?
-No.
649
00:33:31,478 --> 00:33:33,013
I bet it's Mom.
650
00:33:33,113 --> 00:33:34,582
I bet you're right. Ugh.
651
00:33:34,682 --> 00:33:37,317
Parental abduction is defined
as one parent taking a child
652
00:33:37,417 --> 00:33:39,621
without permission from the
other parent.
653
00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:43,090
- Yeah.
- You kidnapped Ezra?
654
00:33:43,190 --> 00:33:45,259
I can't be kidnapping if I'm
his father.
655
00:33:45,359 --> 00:33:47,027
Of course it can!
You have a restraining order!
656
00:33:47,127 --> 00:33:48,295
I'm saving my son's life.
657
00:33:48,395 --> 00:33:50,230
Ezzie needs somebody to
advocate for him
658
00:33:50,330 --> 00:33:52,199
the way you and I used to do
together.
659
00:33:52,299 --> 00:33:53,601
You know I'm right.
660
00:33:53,701 --> 00:33:56,738
No! No, you're not right, Max.
You are wrong, okay?
661
00:33:56,838 --> 00:33:59,039
You need to bring him home now!
662
00:34:01,141 --> 00:34:02,944
- Is that Ezra?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
663
00:34:03,043 --> 00:34:04,344
- Let go!
- No bananas!
664
00:34:04,444 --> 00:34:06,380
- No bananas!
- No bananas!
665
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:07,982
-Get his inhaler!
-Excuse me!
666
00:34:08,081 --> 00:34:09,416
Okay, Ezzie. It's all right,
breathe.
667
00:34:09,517 --> 00:34:12,352
Breathe! Breathe.
Breathe. Breathe, all right.
668
00:34:12,452 --> 00:34:14,689
I got you. It's okay.
Come on. Come on, come on.
669
00:34:14,789 --> 00:34:16,423
Where's the bathroom?
Where's the bathroom?
670
00:34:16,524 --> 00:34:19,092
Come on. You're okay.
671
00:34:22,362 --> 00:34:23,463
He's all right.
672
00:34:23,565 --> 00:34:25,299
Look, I didn't know that there
were
673
00:34:25,399 --> 00:34:27,769
bananas in the oatmeal, right?
674
00:34:27,869 --> 00:34:30,437
-What you're doing is insane!
-Nah, I don't think it is.
675
00:34:30,538 --> 00:34:32,607
That's the problem. You're notthinking.
676
00:34:32,707 --> 00:34:34,474
Trust me, this is very,
677
00:34:34,576 --> 00:34:35,710
very, very bad.
678
00:34:35,810 --> 00:34:36,978
In fact, this is a crime.
679
00:34:37,077 --> 00:34:38,780
Bring him back!
680
00:34:40,213 --> 00:34:42,115
Max?
681
00:34:42,517 --> 00:34:44,852
Holy shit! He hung up on me
again!
682
00:34:46,453 --> 00:34:47,454
Fuck!
683
00:34:49,089 --> 00:34:50,792
You know, you can call the
police.
684
00:34:53,628 --> 00:34:55,830
No, I'm not--
I'm not gonna make this worse.
685
00:34:55,930 --> 00:34:58,165
I'm not traumatizing my son.
686
00:35:17,585 --> 00:35:20,420
Hey, buddy,
what's the deal with the
bananas?
687
00:35:22,890 --> 00:35:26,193
-Hmm?
-I start gagging, and I can't
breathe.
688
00:35:26,861 --> 00:35:29,229
Well, okay, but we know that
you're not allergic to bananas,
right?
689
00:35:29,329 --> 00:35:31,431
Because we saw that doctor,
remember?
690
00:35:31,532 --> 00:35:34,802
So, maybe the banana thing's
in your mind, you know?
691
00:35:40,608 --> 00:35:44,478
I'm growling and I'm mooing,
what am I?
692
00:35:44,879 --> 00:35:48,049
I got no idea, but you're
freakin' me out
there with no shirt on.
693
00:35:48,148 --> 00:35:50,084
Mad cow disease!
694
00:35:50,183 --> 00:35:52,920
Oh, is that original material?
695
00:35:53,021 --> 00:35:54,388
-SpongeBob.
-Ah, I see.
696
00:35:54,488 --> 00:35:55,957
That's why it wasn't funny.
697
00:36:09,302 --> 00:36:10,838
Are you going to prison?
698
00:36:13,775 --> 00:36:17,078
Look, Ez, Dad made a big
decision
when I was upset,
699
00:36:17,177 --> 00:36:18,713
and that's never a good idea.
700
00:36:18,813 --> 00:36:20,213
"Bang, bang, bitches.
701
00:36:20,313 --> 00:36:22,984
I'll cut off his head
and feed him to the fishes!"
702
00:36:23,084 --> 00:36:26,087
Okay. Maybe no more BreakingBad.
703
00:36:26,186 --> 00:36:28,321
Mom might be right about that
one.
704
00:36:28,422 --> 00:36:30,892
Bruce wants to kill you.
You can't go home.
705
00:36:30,992 --> 00:36:34,762
-Okay, he's definitely not a
fan--
-No! That's what he said!
706
00:36:34,862 --> 00:36:35,763
What?
707
00:36:37,098 --> 00:36:39,199
-When?
-When I got hit by the cab.
708
00:36:39,299 --> 00:36:42,335
I was coming to Pop-Pop's
to warn you about Bruce.
709
00:36:43,336 --> 00:36:44,806
Okay, hold that thought, buddy.
710
00:36:51,311 --> 00:36:53,181
Are you telling me
711
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:55,583
that you didn't run
into the street on purpose?
712
00:36:56,718 --> 00:36:58,385
Ezzie?
713
00:36:58,485 --> 00:37:00,154
Ezzie, I need your eyes, okay?
714
00:37:00,253 --> 00:37:01,989
This is very important.
715
00:37:02,957 --> 00:37:06,259
Are you saying that
you didn't run into the street
on purpose?
716
00:37:06,359 --> 00:37:08,730
Am I nuts? A dog tried to bite
me.
717
00:37:11,065 --> 00:37:12,299
Did you tell Mom this?
718
00:37:15,536 --> 00:37:17,805
-Don't be mad.
-Nobody's mad.
719
00:37:17,905 --> 00:37:19,406
-There was--
-I wasn't supposed to tell you?
720
00:37:19,507 --> 00:37:21,008
Yes, of course. Hey.
721
00:37:21,109 --> 00:37:23,711
Telling the truth,
that's your biggest superpower.
722
00:37:23,811 --> 00:37:24,946
Huh?
723
00:37:25,278 --> 00:37:26,547
Thanks for telling me.
724
00:37:27,915 --> 00:37:28,916
You know what?
725
00:37:29,717 --> 00:37:30,785
You know what?
726
00:37:30,885 --> 00:37:32,153
I think we gotta dance.
727
00:37:32,252 --> 00:37:33,688
I think we gotta dance.
728
00:37:34,088 --> 00:37:36,557
- Come on. Let's find a good
station.
729
00:37:36,657 --> 00:37:38,926
Ah! There it is.
Ah. Can you move your butt
muscles?
730
00:37:39,026 --> 00:37:41,529
Come on. Let's go.
Move it up. Into your chest.
731
00:37:41,629 --> 00:37:44,498
Into your shoulders.
Ah, yeah! Let it roll.
732
00:37:44,599 --> 00:37:47,300
Let it roll. Down to the ass.
Back up to the shoulders.
733
00:37:47,400 --> 00:37:50,938
Now some pops. Some claps. Huh?
Elbows up.
734
00:37:51,038 --> 00:37:52,507
Ah, yeah, let it roll.
735
00:37:52,607 --> 00:37:54,341
Let it roll. Come on.
Up into your chest, dude.
736
00:37:54,441 --> 00:37:55,777
Into your chest, Ezzie.
737
00:37:55,877 --> 00:37:58,478
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
Let it roll. Let it roll.
738
00:37:58,579 --> 00:38:00,347
♪ Express yourself ♪
739
00:38:06,286 --> 00:38:08,222
I need to rinse!
740
00:38:08,355 --> 00:38:10,390
Coming.
741
00:38:14,394 --> 00:38:15,395
Hey, Jayne.
742
00:38:15,495 --> 00:38:17,532
-Where the hell are you?
-Uh,
743
00:38:17,632 --> 00:38:19,167
I'm just taking a little timeoff with Ez.
744
00:38:19,267 --> 00:38:21,135
Not a good time to take off,
Max.
745
00:38:21,803 --> 00:38:24,272
Yeah. I-- I know. I know.
I-- I screwed up.
746
00:38:24,371 --> 00:38:25,973
Yes, you did, and they were
pissed!
747
00:38:26,073 --> 00:38:28,576
Yeah, look, I had a bad night.
It happens, right?
748
00:38:28,676 --> 00:38:31,813
No.Sal Argento had abad night.
749
00:38:31,913 --> 00:38:34,414
Yeah. I guess that's something,
right?
750
00:38:34,515 --> 00:38:36,584
No, what's something is having
a manager
751
00:38:36,684 --> 00:38:39,153
who gets Jimmy Kimmel to watch
the video.
752
00:38:39,253 --> 00:38:40,855
Video?
753
00:38:40,955 --> 00:38:42,355
What-- what video?
754
00:38:42,455 --> 00:38:44,357
The one I made with my phone!
755
00:38:44,457 --> 00:38:46,393
He wants to book you.
756
00:38:46,493 --> 00:38:48,563
- What?
- I need to rinse!
757
00:38:48,663 --> 00:38:50,765
So you have to get yourself to
LA.
758
00:38:50,865 --> 00:38:53,234
They're not gonna fly you.
Is that gonna be a problem?
759
00:38:53,333 --> 00:38:54,869
Uh, no.
760
00:38:55,169 --> 00:38:57,404
-Uh, when?
-Next Friday,
761
00:38:57,505 --> 00:38:59,307
4:00 pm in the Kimmel studio.
762
00:38:59,406 --> 00:39:01,242
Rinse!
763
00:39:01,341 --> 00:39:03,410
Okay. All right. I'm coming.
Uh...
764
00:39:04,011 --> 00:39:06,180
-He loved you, Max.
-He loved me, really?
765
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:07,515
I love you, Jayne.
766
00:39:07,615 --> 00:39:09,717
You're full of shit. Bye.
767
00:39:09,817 --> 00:39:10,685
Rinse!
768
00:39:10,785 --> 00:39:13,420
Okay. I'm coming. I'm coming.
Hey, ow!
769
00:39:13,521 --> 00:39:15,857
Shit! That's boiling hot!
Come on, get out!
770
00:39:15,957 --> 00:39:17,959
Get out! Get out! Get out! Come
on.
771
00:39:18,059 --> 00:39:20,061
What-- what are you doing?
Why-- don't you feel it? It's
hot!
772
00:39:20,161 --> 00:39:22,830
-I don't-- I don't feel hot!
-Okay, it's hot, though.
773
00:39:22,930 --> 00:39:24,599
Okay? Look at your arms.
They're all red!
774
00:39:24,699 --> 00:39:26,734
Mom checks the temperature!
775
00:39:26,834 --> 00:39:30,071
That's fine, but if you see
steam,
it means it's too hot, okay?
776
00:39:30,171 --> 00:39:31,706
-God damn it!
-My stupid brain.
777
00:39:31,806 --> 00:39:33,875
-Stop, no. Hey, come on. Sit
down.
-Stupid! Stupid!
778
00:39:33,975 --> 00:39:35,810
-Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
-Stop that, okay?
779
00:39:35,910 --> 00:39:38,079
You're not stupid!
You're not-- stop hitting
yourself.
780
00:39:38,179 --> 00:39:40,581
Hey, hey, hey, listen to me.
Hey, hey. You're not stupid.
781
00:39:40,681 --> 00:39:42,116
You're not stupid. You're
smart, okay?
782
00:39:42,216 --> 00:39:45,853
If you see steam, it means it's
too hot.
Easy-peasy, okay?
783
00:39:47,588 --> 00:39:50,157
It's on the cards.
784
00:39:50,258 --> 00:39:51,959
We don't have the fucking cards!
785
00:39:53,460 --> 00:39:54,896
I'm sorry.
786
00:39:55,529 --> 00:39:57,732
-Mom uses Bactine.
-Oh, yeah? Well, guess what.
787
00:39:57,832 --> 00:39:59,700
We don't have Bactine, so you
and I,
788
00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:01,936
we're gonna have
to figure it out together, all
right?
789
00:40:02,036 --> 00:40:04,471
There we go. Nice.
790
00:40:04,572 --> 00:40:05,673
You know what? I got a better
idea.
791
00:40:05,773 --> 00:40:07,742
I got a better idea. Let go.
Here.
792
00:40:08,042 --> 00:40:11,579
Ready? Come on. Stand up.
Stand up. Arms up.
793
00:40:12,146 --> 00:40:14,649
Huh? Armpits. Isn't this fun?
794
00:40:14,749 --> 00:40:17,450
Huh? Does Mom do stuff like
this? No?
795
00:40:17,551 --> 00:40:19,253
I didn't think so. Okay.
796
00:40:19,353 --> 00:40:20,821
We got this!
797
00:40:21,589 --> 00:40:23,190
Why do you always yell?
798
00:40:24,792 --> 00:40:27,295
Because Pop-Pop
used to lock me in the attic
799
00:40:27,395 --> 00:40:28,495
chained to a radiator.
800
00:40:28,596 --> 00:40:30,831
I had to yell so he'd remember
to feed me.
801
00:40:30,932 --> 00:40:33,234
There are no radiators in
attics.
802
00:40:33,668 --> 00:40:35,836
You are good. Nothing gets past
you.
803
00:40:37,672 --> 00:40:38,906
Boom. There you go.
804
00:40:39,006 --> 00:40:40,875
I want to talk to you about
something.
805
00:40:40,975 --> 00:40:43,678
I just got off the phone with
Aunt Jayne.
806
00:40:44,545 --> 00:40:48,349
Turns out Jimmy Kimmel wants me
to be on his show in Los
Angeles.
807
00:40:48,448 --> 00:40:49,650
That's far.
808
00:40:50,284 --> 00:40:51,953
Yeah, it is far.
809
00:40:52,586 --> 00:40:56,857
Did you get the part about
Jimmy Kimmel wanting me
to be a guest on his show?
810
00:40:56,958 --> 00:40:58,159
Yeah?
811
00:40:58,259 --> 00:41:00,227
So, you got anything for me?
812
00:41:00,328 --> 00:41:01,729
Any advice for your dad?
813
00:41:03,864 --> 00:41:04,932
Be polite.
814
00:41:05,032 --> 00:41:06,100
"Be polite."
815
00:41:07,401 --> 00:41:08,636
Anything else?
816
00:41:09,704 --> 00:41:12,506
- Nope. Now stop asking me.
- Okay.
817
00:41:13,908 --> 00:41:15,309
But where am I gonna get my
mojo from?
818
00:41:15,409 --> 00:41:18,478
-Mojo man!
-That's right.
819
00:41:18,579 --> 00:41:20,414
Good. Okay.
820
00:41:20,815 --> 00:41:22,350
Let's have a staring contest.
821
00:41:22,450 --> 00:41:24,118
-I don't want to.
-Come on.
822
00:41:24,218 --> 00:41:25,753
-For me? Please.
-No.
823
00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:27,989
-Pretty please?
-No.
824
00:41:28,389 --> 00:41:30,124
What if I make it worth your
while?
825
00:41:32,426 --> 00:41:35,896
If I win, we go trick-or-treat?
826
00:41:37,098 --> 00:41:38,532
Yeah, deal.
827
00:41:38,966 --> 00:41:41,869
Ready? Come on.
First one that blinks loses.
828
00:41:41,969 --> 00:41:44,105
Go, one, two,
829
00:41:44,205 --> 00:41:45,773
three, four...
830
00:41:45,873 --> 00:41:48,376
-Are you autistic?
-...five, six...
831
00:41:48,909 --> 00:41:50,511
-seven...
-Mom says you are.
832
00:41:50,611 --> 00:41:53,280
...eight--
Mom thinks everyone's autistic--
833
00:41:53,381 --> 00:41:55,649
-nine, ten...
-She thinks you got it from
Pop-Pop,
834
00:41:55,750 --> 00:41:57,218
who gave it to you, who gave it
to me.
835
00:41:57,318 --> 00:41:59,854
Listen to me.
Nobody knows for sure, okay,
honey?
836
00:41:59,954 --> 00:42:01,055
Nobody.
837
00:42:01,222 --> 00:42:03,124
But it doesn't matter
'cause you're awesome.
838
00:42:03,224 --> 00:42:04,592
Fourteen, 15, 16...
839
00:42:04,692 --> 00:42:06,827
-Does Mom love me?
-...seventeen.
840
00:42:08,029 --> 00:42:10,965
Buddy, Mom loves you
more than anything in the world.
841
00:42:11,065 --> 00:42:12,199
Yeah. Okay?
842
00:42:12,333 --> 00:42:14,068
She and I, we're just having
a disagreement right now.
843
00:42:14,168 --> 00:42:18,172
-You blinked! I win!
-Uh! Oh, you did so good.
844
00:42:18,272 --> 00:42:20,441
You did so good. You win.
845
00:42:20,541 --> 00:42:22,511
Good job, buddy.
846
00:42:22,610 --> 00:42:26,047
Let's go. Bring it. Yeah, baby!
Whoo!
847
00:42:27,748 --> 00:42:29,216
Stan, can you open up,
please!
848
00:42:30,484 --> 00:42:31,485
Stan!
849
00:42:32,920 --> 00:42:35,790
We need to talk!
850
00:42:35,890 --> 00:42:37,425
Stan?
851
00:42:37,526 --> 00:42:39,060
Hey, I know you're in there!
852
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:40,895
Open the door!
853
00:42:41,629 --> 00:42:42,830
Open the door!
854
00:42:46,033 --> 00:42:48,636
Stan, just talk to me, please?
855
00:42:49,170 --> 00:42:51,338
I'm worried about them.
856
00:42:54,175 --> 00:42:55,176
Please?
857
00:43:05,152 --> 00:43:06,220
You don't give a shit!
858
00:43:06,887 --> 00:43:07,822
Huh?
859
00:43:07,955 --> 00:43:10,124
You're going to let Max
ruin his life again!
860
00:43:10,224 --> 00:43:12,760
And your boys too!
861
00:43:13,694 --> 00:43:15,596
Jerk!
862
00:43:32,813 --> 00:43:35,816
♪ Watching a stretch of road ♪
863
00:43:37,084 --> 00:43:40,321
♪ Miles of light explode ♪
864
00:43:41,622 --> 00:43:44,559
♪ Drifting off a thing ♪
865
00:43:45,092 --> 00:43:48,062
♪ I'd never done before ♪
866
00:43:49,930 --> 00:43:53,134
♪ Watching a crowd roll in ♪
867
00:43:54,435 --> 00:43:57,738
♪ Out go the lights it begins ♪
868
00:43:59,608 --> 00:44:02,042
Hey! There they are!
869
00:44:02,577 --> 00:44:03,644
- Hey!
- Hey!
870
00:44:03,744 --> 00:44:05,713
Hello, baby!
871
00:44:05,813 --> 00:44:09,483
Ezzie, get on out here
and give your Uncle Nicky a hug!
872
00:44:09,584 --> 00:44:12,953
Oh, come on, come here!
Hey, where you going, kid? Oh,
I got you.
873
00:44:13,053 --> 00:44:16,056
Oh, that's it. That's it!
You are dead. You're so dead!
Oh!
874
00:44:17,592 --> 00:44:19,994
Hi! I'm Margaret.
875
00:44:20,094 --> 00:44:21,295
How are you?
876
00:44:22,564 --> 00:44:24,365
Wanna help me set the table?
877
00:44:25,966 --> 00:44:27,334
Come on.
878
00:44:27,902 --> 00:44:31,472
- Oh, you're...
- Oh! Look at you!
879
00:44:31,573 --> 00:44:34,543
No chance! Jesus Christ, man.
Huh?
880
00:44:34,643 --> 00:44:37,512
Bottomless s'mores when you run
a camp.
881
00:44:37,612 --> 00:44:39,614
-Endless s'mores.
-Can you get that?
882
00:44:39,713 --> 00:44:40,948
-I'm not gonna carry anything.
-Okay.
883
00:44:41,048 --> 00:44:42,716
What's up with the, uh--
the bad habit there?
884
00:44:42,816 --> 00:44:44,785
That's Sister Margaret from
Senegal.
885
00:44:44,885 --> 00:44:46,720
Oh. That's way outta town.
886
00:44:46,820 --> 00:44:49,323
Yeah, she's, uh,
staying with a family in Ann
Arbor.
887
00:44:49,423 --> 00:44:50,691
She goes to Michigan.
888
00:44:50,925 --> 00:44:53,160
You know that they want nuns
to have a bachelor's degree?
889
00:44:53,260 --> 00:44:56,330
-Why the fuck would I know that?
-I mean, can you imagine that?
890
00:44:56,430 --> 00:44:59,033
Four years of college
before you can say your vows.
891
00:44:59,133 --> 00:45:00,834
But as long as
she's on my staff,
892
00:45:00,935 --> 00:45:02,836
Catholic church pays
half my expenses.
893
00:45:02,937 --> 00:45:05,206
Huh. Scammin' the Vatican.
I'm proud of you.
894
00:45:05,306 --> 00:45:07,241
- Yeah, huh.
- There's no cheese on it.
895
00:45:07,341 --> 00:45:09,611
Wait 'til you try it. It's
incredible.
896
00:45:09,710 --> 00:45:11,546
She uses ancient
Senegalese spices.
897
00:45:11,646 --> 00:45:12,746
I got the spice
from Costco.
898
00:45:12,846 --> 00:45:14,748
-Whoa!
-Costco.
899
00:45:14,848 --> 00:45:17,351
That sounds exotic! Costco.
900
00:45:17,451 --> 00:45:19,353
I thought you brought it from
Senegal.
901
00:45:19,453 --> 00:45:21,488
No. You're mixing up the
cheeses.
902
00:45:21,590 --> 00:45:24,024
And she puts goat--
she puts goat in the lasagna.
903
00:45:24,124 --> 00:45:27,261
- What's wrong?
- Metal hurts my teeth.
904
00:45:28,162 --> 00:45:31,566
Okay, but you know,
plastic hurts the planet. So...
905
00:45:31,666 --> 00:45:33,934
Oh, I got some plastic
right in the store room, I can
just--
906
00:45:34,034 --> 00:45:35,736
No, no. We're okay.
We're gonna use the fork.
907
00:45:35,836 --> 00:45:36,870
It's okay--
908
00:45:36,971 --> 00:45:37,938
It's mind over matter
like the bananas.
909
00:45:38,038 --> 00:45:39,807
Come on, Ezzie, try it.
910
00:45:40,774 --> 00:45:41,942
Ezzie.
911
00:45:42,042 --> 00:45:43,811
E-- Ez, come on. That's not
polite.
912
00:45:43,911 --> 00:45:45,913
Pick up the fork and try it
please.
913
00:45:46,013 --> 00:45:48,148
-Ez?
-I-- I need plastic.
914
00:45:48,249 --> 00:45:50,884
-Mom has plastic!
-Okay. Well, Mom's not here.
915
00:45:50,985 --> 00:45:53,120
Ezra. Where you going?
916
00:45:53,622 --> 00:45:56,190
- Ezra?
- I need plastic!
917
00:45:56,290 --> 00:45:58,759
- You don't listen to me!
- Sorry, guys.
918
00:45:58,859 --> 00:46:00,629
Ez, come on. Come on back,
please.
919
00:46:00,729 --> 00:46:02,062
It hurts me!
920
00:46:02,162 --> 00:46:03,998
- Because they're razor sharp!
- Ezzie! Ezzie!
921
00:46:04,098 --> 00:46:05,799
-It's not in my mind!
-Ezzie!
922
00:46:05,899 --> 00:46:08,202
-Ezra, come and sit down!
-I'm not taking it!
923
00:46:08,302 --> 00:46:09,704
I'll make you a deal. I'll let
you eat with your fingers
924
00:46:09,803 --> 00:46:11,640
if you try a fork once.
925
00:46:11,740 --> 00:46:14,542
-It hurts! It hurts!
-Once, Ezra.
926
00:46:15,809 --> 00:46:17,011
I would take that deal.
927
00:46:17,111 --> 00:46:19,581
- I need plastic!
- Sounds like a good deal.
928
00:46:19,681 --> 00:46:21,750
Plus, I'm gonna use my fingers,
too.
929
00:46:21,849 --> 00:46:23,083
So will I.
930
00:46:25,352 --> 00:46:26,787
Once, Ezzie?
931
00:46:28,623 --> 00:46:29,957
Deal?
932
00:46:31,726 --> 00:46:35,262
Okay! Let's do it! Let's get to
work!
933
00:46:35,362 --> 00:46:36,698
All right!
934
00:46:37,097 --> 00:46:39,466
Come on, Max. Join the party.
935
00:46:39,967 --> 00:46:42,637
Join the lasagna party. Now--
oh, God.
936
00:46:42,737 --> 00:46:44,338
- Oh, man. Of course.
- Oh, my!
937
00:46:44,438 --> 00:46:47,308
"They each shouldered the heavy
pack
and the water skin
938
00:46:47,408 --> 00:46:48,643
which was their share,
939
00:46:48,743 --> 00:46:52,446
then turned from the light
that lay on the lands outside
940
00:46:52,547 --> 00:46:54,683
and plunged into the forest."
941
00:47:39,761 --> 00:47:41,395
You can go now.
942
00:47:46,467 --> 00:47:47,935
Ezzie, did you just--
943
00:47:51,806 --> 00:47:52,973
For me?
944
00:47:54,041 --> 00:47:55,577
You can go now.
945
00:47:56,310 --> 00:47:57,244
Okay?
946
00:47:58,747 --> 00:48:00,247
Goodbye.
947
00:48:03,384 --> 00:48:04,451
Okay.
948
00:48:21,736 --> 00:48:25,640
Max, oh, my goodness,
I have a crush on your son.
949
00:48:25,740 --> 00:48:26,974
Ah, he'll break your heart.
950
00:48:27,074 --> 00:48:28,676
Don't worry. I can take it.
951
00:48:28,777 --> 00:48:30,177
All right, but you know what?
952
00:48:30,277 --> 00:48:32,847
If there's no future, Sister,
let's not lead him on.
953
00:48:32,946 --> 00:48:35,082
Hey, hey. I haven't taken my
vows yet.
954
00:48:35,182 --> 00:48:37,685
- Oh!
- Uh-oh. Okay.
955
00:48:45,025 --> 00:48:46,326
Good night.
956
00:48:46,427 --> 00:48:48,061
- Good night.
- Smoking, huh?
957
00:48:48,162 --> 00:48:50,497
The wages of sin is death.
958
00:48:50,998 --> 00:48:52,767
Did she just bless you?
959
00:48:53,033 --> 00:48:54,803
She does it every time she
leaves.
960
00:48:54,903 --> 00:48:56,704
I think it's making me a better
man.
961
00:48:59,072 --> 00:49:03,210
Look, I-- I don't want to be
sacrilegious,
but I think this could be love.
962
00:49:03,878 --> 00:49:04,813
Hey.
963
00:49:04,913 --> 00:49:05,979
I'm Greek Orthodox,
964
00:49:06,079 --> 00:49:07,347
and we don't go there.
965
00:49:07,448 --> 00:49:09,016
Okay?
966
00:49:09,116 --> 00:49:11,385
And she, oh-- she's a holy
spirit.
967
00:49:11,485 --> 00:49:13,888
-All right. Here you go.
-I'm just saying, man.
968
00:49:13,987 --> 00:49:16,457
House in the woods, summer
camp, hot nun.
969
00:49:18,025 --> 00:49:21,028
Yeah, it sure beats
telling dick jokes to drunken
tourists.
970
00:49:21,128 --> 00:49:22,530
Hey, it's a living.
971
00:49:23,997 --> 00:49:25,533
It wasn't for me.
972
00:49:27,968 --> 00:49:29,203
So why are you here?
973
00:49:29,303 --> 00:49:30,939
What do you mean? I needed a
little Nicky.
974
00:49:32,172 --> 00:49:33,775
You got a little bit of Nicky,
975
00:49:33,875 --> 00:49:38,278
and, uh, Nicky's a little
concerned.
976
00:49:38,378 --> 00:49:40,748
You haven't signed
the papers yet, have you?
977
00:49:41,148 --> 00:49:43,016
Seriously?
978
00:49:46,186 --> 00:49:49,056
-That's it. You blew my high.
-Are you gonna cry?
979
00:49:49,156 --> 00:49:50,959
Do you wanna cry? You wanna let
it go?
980
00:49:51,058 --> 00:49:52,794
Come to Papa Bear. Come on.
981
00:49:53,427 --> 00:49:55,329
I tried to give her everything,
Nick.
982
00:49:55,429 --> 00:49:56,831
But where would she put it?
983
00:49:59,333 --> 00:50:01,870
-God bless Steven Wright.
-Ah.
984
00:50:01,970 --> 00:50:04,238
"All those who believe in
psychokinesis
985
00:50:04,338 --> 00:50:07,675
-raise my hand."
-"Raise my hand."
986
00:50:07,775 --> 00:50:10,512
I broke into Jenna's house
in the middle of the night,
987
00:50:10,612 --> 00:50:11,913
and I kidnapped Ezra.
988
00:50:15,717 --> 00:50:17,084
All right, I'll play along.
989
00:50:17,184 --> 00:50:19,654
Why did you break into Jenna's
house
and kidnap Ezra?
990
00:50:19,754 --> 00:50:22,690
Ezzie snuck out of Jenna's
and got hit by a cab.
991
00:50:22,790 --> 00:50:23,958
What?
992
00:50:24,258 --> 00:50:26,528
His doctor said
he might've done it on purpose.
993
00:50:26,628 --> 00:50:27,562
Shit!
994
00:50:27,662 --> 00:50:29,531
You think that was true?
995
00:50:29,631 --> 00:50:32,266
No! Wha-- you kidding me?
996
00:50:32,366 --> 00:50:35,235
Every day he wakes up,
that kid chooses life.
997
00:50:35,803 --> 00:50:37,104
Oh, good.
998
00:50:38,171 --> 00:50:40,274
That's good.
999
00:50:40,675 --> 00:50:41,943
So why'd you do it?
1000
00:50:42,577 --> 00:50:44,913
Jenna thinks he should go
to a special needs school, and
I don't.
1001
00:50:45,013 --> 00:50:47,047
-Why not?
-Because in public school,
1002
00:50:47,147 --> 00:50:49,817
you know, he'll learn how to
fight,
learn how to protect himself.
1003
00:50:49,918 --> 00:50:51,084
What are you, the great Santini?
1004
00:50:51,184 --> 00:50:52,854
What are you-- what are you
talking about?
1005
00:50:52,954 --> 00:50:55,122
I see people move away from Ez,
right?
1006
00:50:55,523 --> 00:50:58,158
He has a temper tantrum
or he's just walking down the
street.
1007
00:50:58,258 --> 00:51:02,062
You know, people aren't trying
to be mean,
it's just that it's easier.
1008
00:51:02,162 --> 00:51:04,231
You know the word "autism"
comes from the Greek
1009
00:51:04,331 --> 00:51:05,600
"in your own world."
1010
00:51:05,700 --> 00:51:08,335
I don't want him
in his own world, Nick. I--
1011
00:51:13,340 --> 00:51:14,776
I want him in
this world.
1012
00:51:26,688 --> 00:51:28,022
You make it back okay?
1013
00:51:28,355 --> 00:51:29,757
Put Max on the phone.
1014
00:51:29,857 --> 00:51:32,159
Oh, my God.
1015
00:51:32,259 --> 00:51:33,995
I don't have your pan.
1016
00:51:34,094 --> 00:51:35,429
Hello.
1017
00:51:38,131 --> 00:51:40,133
-Hello?
-Yeah, I'm right here, Pop.
1018
00:51:40,233 --> 00:51:41,769
What do you think,
the world stopped for you
1019
00:51:41,869 --> 00:51:44,038
-to hang out with this idiot?
-What are you talking about?
1020
00:51:44,137 --> 00:51:46,139
She took my son and I took him
back!
1021
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:48,208
You made a promise,
you didn't keep your promise.
1022
00:51:48,308 --> 00:51:50,177
She's throwing rocks at my
window now.
1023
00:51:50,277 --> 00:51:51,846
-Hang up the phone.
-Hello?
1024
00:51:51,946 --> 00:51:53,380
I'm coming there tomorrow!
1025
00:51:53,480 --> 00:51:54,949
- No!
- Then listen to me carefully.
1026
00:51:55,049 --> 00:51:56,884
Call Ezzie's mom.
1027
00:51:56,985 --> 00:51:59,887
-You hear me? Call Ezzie's mom.
-I don't have your pan.
1028
00:52:06,326 --> 00:52:08,395
-Where are you?
-Uh, don't worry about it.
1029
00:52:08,495 --> 00:52:11,498
-Where are you? Where are you?
-You know, Jen, I gotta say,
1030
00:52:11,599 --> 00:52:13,868
in spite of everything
that we've been through,
1031
00:52:13,968 --> 00:52:16,136
I-- I really believed you
when you said that no matter
what,
1032
00:52:16,236 --> 00:52:18,106
we were gonna treat
each other like family,
1033
00:52:18,205 --> 00:52:19,607
and we were gonna be
honest with each other.
1034
00:52:19,707 --> 00:52:21,709
-Remember you said that?
-You haven't been honest, Max.
1035
00:52:21,809 --> 00:52:24,478
You took him,
and you need to bring him home!
1036
00:52:24,579 --> 00:52:25,780
L-Let me ask you something.
1037
00:52:26,080 --> 00:52:27,682
Did Ezra tell you that
the reason he ran into the
street
1038
00:52:27,782 --> 00:52:30,484
was because he thought
he was gonna get bit by a dog?
1039
00:52:30,585 --> 00:52:33,286
Yes, I mean, what difference
does it make?
1040
00:52:33,387 --> 00:52:36,356
He ran out of the house
in his pajamas, barefoot,
1041
00:52:36,456 --> 00:52:38,126
and he nearly got hit by a cab!
1042
00:52:38,225 --> 00:52:40,260
Yeah, because he heard your
boyfriend
say he was gonna kill me.
1043
00:52:40,360 --> 00:52:41,696
Yeah, and he was coming towarn me.
1044
00:52:41,796 --> 00:52:44,699
Okay, y-- you're scaring me
now, Max.
1045
00:52:44,799 --> 00:52:47,635
I'm scaring you?
Why don't you ask your
boyfriend?
1046
00:52:47,935 --> 00:52:49,202
You know Ezzie doesn't lie!
1047
00:52:49,302 --> 00:52:51,338
Okay. Hey, hey, you-- you're
right.
1048
00:52:51,438 --> 00:52:53,775
You are family. You are.
1049
00:52:54,274 --> 00:52:57,210
But you need
to just bring him home now,
okay?
1050
00:52:58,646 --> 00:53:00,982
Come home,
and we'll talk about all of
this.
1051
00:53:01,448 --> 00:53:02,717
None of this is easy,
1052
00:53:02,817 --> 00:53:06,020
but all I ever wanted
was just to protect our boy.
1053
00:53:06,453 --> 00:53:08,056
Well, I'm protecting him now.
1054
00:53:08,156 --> 00:53:09,624
And leave my father alone.
1055
00:53:14,696 --> 00:53:17,999
You waited four days
to call about a missing child
1056
00:53:18,099 --> 00:53:19,901
taken by a man you're divorcing,
1057
00:53:20,001 --> 00:53:22,770
who has a restraining order
keeping him from seeing that
child.
1058
00:53:22,870 --> 00:53:25,606
- Is that about right?
- I know how it sounds.
1059
00:53:26,406 --> 00:53:27,608
He's his father.
1060
00:53:27,709 --> 00:53:29,177
You don't think he'd hurt your
son?
1061
00:53:29,276 --> 00:53:30,912
No. No, no, absolutely not.
1062
00:53:31,278 --> 00:53:33,246
All right. Um, let's make a few
calls.
1063
00:53:33,346 --> 00:53:36,483
We'll see if we can find him,
and, um, put a trace on his
phone.
1064
00:53:36,584 --> 00:53:38,385
No disrespect, Mike, but no.
1065
00:53:38,485 --> 00:53:42,123
I'm sorry, miss, but right now
I'm not feelin' good about this.
1066
00:53:42,222 --> 00:53:43,958
-You understand?
-Yeah, I understand.
1067
00:53:44,058 --> 00:53:47,729
Good, because from a missing
and exploited child perspective,
1068
00:53:47,829 --> 00:53:50,198
we need to issue an Amber Alert
now.
1069
00:53:50,297 --> 00:53:52,299
Are you sure this situation
warrants--
1070
00:53:52,399 --> 00:53:54,902
Margo, let's just start
with a missing person's report
1071
00:53:55,002 --> 00:53:57,138
Amber is for situations
exactly like this one.
1072
00:53:57,237 --> 00:53:58,940
And we're late, ma'am.
1073
00:53:59,040 --> 00:54:01,542
I'm afraid it's not your
decision.
1074
00:54:03,845 --> 00:54:05,445
You know how to do
it?
1075
00:54:22,262 --> 00:54:25,666
Hey, that's nice. Thank
you.
1076
00:54:26,100 --> 00:54:28,736
- Packed up and ready to go.
- -Okay.
1077
00:54:31,539 --> 00:54:33,508
I don't think
that kid's ready to go, though.
1078
00:54:33,608 --> 00:54:34,976
-Hmm?
-You see him over there
1079
00:54:35,076 --> 00:54:37,410
-making lanyards with Sister
Margaret?
-Yeah.
1080
00:54:37,512 --> 00:54:39,647
Kid's trying to steal my girl.
1081
00:54:39,747 --> 00:54:42,216
They look good together.
1082
00:54:42,315 --> 00:54:44,886
I think it's the autism. Chicks
dig it.
1083
00:54:45,686 --> 00:54:48,222
Sometimes I think
I might be on the spectrum.
1084
00:54:48,856 --> 00:54:50,357
I think you check a lot of the
boxes.
1085
00:54:50,457 --> 00:54:52,026
-Yeah.
-But, nah, I just think
1086
00:54:52,126 --> 00:54:53,928
you're a strange dude.
1087
00:54:54,028 --> 00:54:57,231
Yeah, I'm just uncomfortable
in social situations.
1088
00:54:57,330 --> 00:54:58,633
It's good you're out here.
1089
00:54:58,733 --> 00:55:01,969
-Yeah. Keeps me away from...
-Everyone.
1090
00:55:02,069 --> 00:55:04,605
-People.
-Yeah. Yeah.
1091
00:55:05,206 --> 00:55:07,642
You guys are welcome to
stay.
1092
00:55:07,742 --> 00:55:11,045
Oh, buddy. I'd love to stay,
but we can't.
I gotta be in LA.
1093
00:55:11,411 --> 00:55:12,880
What's in LA?
1094
00:55:14,916 --> 00:55:16,050
I booked Kimmel.
1095
00:55:18,519 --> 00:55:20,288
-Are you fucking kidding me?
-Yeah, it's not--
1096
00:55:20,387 --> 00:55:22,990
You wouldn't lead with that?
That's amazing!
1097
00:55:23,090 --> 00:55:25,226
-Yeah, it's okay.
-Max, come on!
1098
00:55:25,325 --> 00:55:26,894
-Kimmel, that's great!
-Yeah.
1099
00:55:26,994 --> 00:55:30,463
Best I did is get bumped from
Arsenio.
Worst night of my life.
1100
00:55:30,565 --> 00:55:32,733
Hasselhoff segment ran long.
1101
00:55:32,834 --> 00:55:35,303
- I'll tell you what, you go to
LA,
1102
00:55:35,402 --> 00:55:36,804
you work on your set, you get
relaxed,
1103
00:55:36,904 --> 00:55:39,006
you get focused, you get
centered,
take care of yourself.
1104
00:55:39,106 --> 00:55:40,174
Leave Ezra with me.
1105
00:55:40,274 --> 00:55:41,275
Me and Margaret will take care
of him--
1106
00:55:41,374 --> 00:55:42,543
I can't do it, buddy.
1107
00:55:42,643 --> 00:55:44,011
-I gotta have him with me.
-Why not?
1108
00:55:44,111 --> 00:55:46,914
Because I need him.
He keeps my feet on the ground.
1109
00:55:47,248 --> 00:55:49,016
All right, fine.
1110
00:55:49,116 --> 00:55:51,185
I'll bake you a cake
and bring it to you in prison.
1111
00:55:51,285 --> 00:55:54,188
Okay, well, make sure
you throw Stan's saucepan in
there.
1112
00:55:54,288 --> 00:55:56,356
I don't have the pan.
1113
00:55:58,993 --> 00:56:02,395
Okay, Mr. and Mrs. Carlton.
Have a lovely day.
1114
00:56:04,632 --> 00:56:06,133
Where are they?
1115
00:56:06,234 --> 00:56:08,202
What do you mean? Just call him.
1116
00:56:08,302 --> 00:56:10,370
He doesn't answer. He's just
like you.
1117
00:56:10,470 --> 00:56:12,640
I-- well, I can't talk.
I'm working. I can't.
1118
00:56:12,740 --> 00:56:15,276
Hello, Mrs. C.
And how are you today, young
ladies?
1119
00:56:15,375 --> 00:56:16,811
- Hi, Stan!
- Score a goal,
1120
00:56:16,911 --> 00:56:18,579
there's a box
of Cracker Jacks in there for
you.
1121
00:56:18,679 --> 00:56:20,147
Cracker Jacks are no good for
her teeth.
1122
00:56:20,248 --> 00:56:22,183
There's gonna be an Amber Alert.
1123
00:56:22,516 --> 00:56:23,985
What do you mean?
You called the cops on him?
1124
00:56:24,085 --> 00:56:25,385
Where is Ezzie?
1125
00:56:27,521 --> 00:56:29,857
He's with his father.
You shouldn't have done that.
1126
00:56:29,957 --> 00:56:32,093
That's a-- that's a very bad
thing to do.
1127
00:56:32,193 --> 00:56:33,761
-I did a bad thing?
-Yes.
1128
00:56:33,861 --> 00:56:36,030
-You're making it so he can't
see him.
-Max did that!
1129
00:56:36,130 --> 00:56:38,266
-What did you expect him to do?
-Not kidnap him!
1130
00:56:38,366 --> 00:56:40,902
You made it kid-- you made it
kidnapping.
1131
00:56:43,170 --> 00:56:44,772
Please. Please.
1132
00:56:44,872 --> 00:56:47,341
-Stan, I don't--
-How could you do that?
1133
00:56:47,440 --> 00:56:49,076
Amber Alert. Do you know what
that is?
1134
00:56:49,176 --> 00:56:51,646
-I don't wanna fight.
-Well, I don't wanna fight
either,
1135
00:56:51,746 --> 00:56:53,480
but all of a sudden
you don't believe in him.
1136
00:56:53,581 --> 00:56:55,249
Now you're gonna-- Amber Alert?
1137
00:56:55,349 --> 00:56:57,685
I got tired of not knowing
what he was gonna do on any
given day.
1138
00:56:57,785 --> 00:57:00,988
I'm already so tired with Ezzie.
Please, I just--
1139
00:57:01,355 --> 00:57:05,359
I'm-- I'm scared. I'm tired.
I'm alone. And I need help.
1140
00:57:06,060 --> 00:57:08,729
Rice Krispies boys make me
really tired.
1141
00:57:16,804 --> 00:57:18,739
All right, well, we're gonna
have to--
1142
00:57:18,839 --> 00:57:21,474
we're gonna have to get to 'em
before the cops do.
1143
00:57:23,311 --> 00:57:25,112
-We?
-Yeah, we. Yeah.
1144
00:57:25,212 --> 00:57:27,014
The shift ends, we start
driving.
1145
00:57:28,382 --> 00:57:29,684
Take 11 hours to get to
Michigan.
1146
00:57:29,784 --> 00:57:31,719
Hopefully, get to them by
tomorrow.
1147
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:34,221
He's at Nick's?
1148
00:57:35,122 --> 00:57:38,192
Yes. He's with Nick.
I'm not happy about that, but
yes.
1149
00:57:38,693 --> 00:57:41,128
Unfortunately,
we're going to Nick's. Yeah.
1150
00:57:41,529 --> 00:57:43,397
I have a self-destructive
personality.
1151
00:57:44,966 --> 00:57:47,435
But it's okay
'cause I recently had a
breakthrough.
1152
00:57:47,535 --> 00:57:50,504
After thousands
of hours of hypnosis therapy,
1153
00:57:50,604 --> 00:57:52,740
I finally met my inner child.
1154
00:57:54,241 --> 00:57:55,276
And he had a gun.
1155
00:58:01,449 --> 00:58:03,417
Yeah, oh, hey. What's up,
little guy?
1156
00:58:03,517 --> 00:58:06,087
Whoa. Okay. Well, what?
1157
00:58:06,420 --> 00:58:09,724
Okay, come on.
Put-- put the gun down. Put the
gun down.
1158
00:58:09,824 --> 00:58:11,325
I'm trying to do a show here.
1159
00:58:11,425 --> 00:58:13,828
Can you get back in my psyche
please?
Thank you.
1160
00:58:13,928 --> 00:58:17,665
Anyway, my therapist said to me,
"Max, you're an adult now.
1161
00:58:17,765 --> 00:58:20,568
You don't need your inner child.
He can't help you anymore."
1162
00:58:20,668 --> 00:58:22,303
I said, "Oh, yeah, really, Mark?
1163
00:58:22,403 --> 00:58:23,871
He's got a gun. What do you got?
1164
00:58:23,971 --> 00:58:26,407
I'm taking this little sociopath
with me everywhere I go."
1165
00:58:26,507 --> 00:58:28,309
Thank you, Lansing!
1166
00:58:28,409 --> 00:58:30,378
Great audience. Have a great
night!
1167
00:58:33,881 --> 00:58:37,418
Come on, everybody,
let's hear it for Max Bernal!
1168
00:58:37,752 --> 00:58:39,687
Let's have a, um, whiskey
neat
1169
00:58:39,787 --> 00:58:41,822
and another pineapple juice
for my manager here.
1170
00:58:41,922 --> 00:58:43,657
Pineapple juice coming right up.
1171
00:58:43,758 --> 00:58:45,526
You really should get the boy
home.
1172
00:58:45,626 --> 00:58:46,927
- Okay.
- He's your son, right?
1173
00:58:47,028 --> 00:58:49,063
Uh, yeah. That's-- uh, that's
my son.
1174
00:58:49,163 --> 00:58:51,232
It's after 12:00. I was
watching him.
1175
00:58:51,332 --> 00:58:52,867
He doesn't seem happy here.
1176
00:58:53,000 --> 00:58:56,137
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on.
You were watching him during my
set?
1177
00:58:56,237 --> 00:58:58,072
-And now I'm offended. I got
this, Ez.
-No, Dad, Dad...
1178
00:58:58,172 --> 00:58:59,874
-I got it.
-No child should be in this
club.
1179
00:58:59,974 --> 00:59:02,143
Especially not a child with
issues.
1180
00:59:02,243 --> 00:59:03,210
-Issues?
-Yeah.
1181
00:59:03,444 --> 00:59:05,146
-I can't hear.
-Really? Let me ask you
something.
1182
00:59:05,246 --> 00:59:07,381
Do I come to where you work
and knock the cock outta your
mouth?
1183
00:59:07,481 --> 00:59:08,517
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1184
00:59:08,616 --> 00:59:09,950
-That's my wife.
-Oh, really?
1185
00:59:10,418 --> 00:59:12,186
I'm sorry to hear that,
but she should mind
her own fucking business.
1186
00:59:12,286 --> 00:59:13,354
Hey, hey, hey!
1187
00:59:18,259 --> 00:59:19,660
Dad!
1188
00:59:21,295 --> 00:59:22,396
Come on, Ezra!
1189
00:59:28,069 --> 00:59:31,906
-They were the owners.
-Like I said, Ez, I didn't know.
1190
00:59:32,507 --> 00:59:35,443
-They were the owners.
-We covered this already, okay?
1191
00:59:35,544 --> 00:59:37,078
That's enough now.
1192
00:59:37,778 --> 00:59:41,048
-I wanna go home.
-Hey, buddy, I'm sorry, okay?
1193
00:59:41,148 --> 00:59:42,683
-I want to go home!
-It was my bad.
1194
00:59:42,783 --> 00:59:44,685
Okay, listen to me, Ezzie, okay?
1195
00:59:45,152 --> 00:59:48,155
Sometimes life's gonna get
messy, okay?
1196
00:59:48,255 --> 00:59:51,926
And if it does, that's okay.
1197
00:59:52,026 --> 00:59:53,562
You know, people say life's
gotta be neat,
1198
00:59:53,661 --> 00:59:55,629
it's gotta be nice, but it
doesn't.
1199
00:59:56,964 --> 00:59:58,833
-You hear me?
-Yes.
1200
01:00:00,601 --> 01:00:01,902
Okay.
1201
01:00:03,370 --> 01:00:04,672
All right, that's good.
1202
01:00:06,607 --> 01:00:07,975
Go to sleep. That's--
1203
01:00:09,176 --> 01:00:10,377
that's a good idea.
1204
01:00:20,555 --> 01:00:22,623
I really appreciate
this, Stan.
1205
01:00:28,496 --> 01:00:30,197
A mother's job is never done.
1206
01:00:31,232 --> 01:00:32,633
Or a father's.
1207
01:00:35,669 --> 01:00:37,771
I guess I don't even know
anymore.
1208
01:00:48,916 --> 01:00:50,784
Here. Turn here. Here.
1209
01:00:58,292 --> 01:01:00,694
There he is. There he is.
Get close. Look, look.
1210
01:01:00,794 --> 01:01:02,763
Okay. Okay.
1211
01:01:04,633 --> 01:01:06,100
Shit!
1212
01:01:06,200 --> 01:01:08,502
Look at your guilt on
your face.
1213
01:01:08,603 --> 01:01:10,505
-What are you doing?
-What am I doing?
1214
01:01:10,605 --> 01:01:12,439
-Run, Zorba, run!
-Get off my property!
1215
01:01:12,541 --> 01:01:14,475
Yeah, run! Come on, run!
1216
01:01:14,576 --> 01:01:15,843
-Fuck you, Stan!
-Yeah, fuck you!
1217
01:01:15,943 --> 01:01:18,345
Come on, I told you,
I don't know where they went!
1218
01:01:18,445 --> 01:01:20,681
I thought you had more sense,
Nick.
1219
01:01:20,781 --> 01:01:23,017
Yeah, well,
I thought you had a heart,
Jenna.
1220
01:01:23,117 --> 01:01:25,352
-Think about Ezra!
-My kid is out there!
1221
01:01:25,452 --> 01:01:26,555
-Oh! Oh! Oh!
-Where is he?
1222
01:01:26,754 --> 01:01:28,122
I'm gonna plunge this
into your heart right now
1223
01:01:28,222 --> 01:01:29,790
unless you tell me exactly
where they are!
1224
01:01:29,890 --> 01:01:30,991
Where are they?
1225
01:01:31,091 --> 01:01:33,060
They went to go do Kimmel in LA!
1226
01:01:35,829 --> 01:01:37,064
He got Kimmel?
1227
01:01:37,164 --> 01:01:37,898
Yeah.
1228
01:01:37,998 --> 01:01:39,333
I know. He booked Kimmel.
1229
01:01:40,535 --> 01:01:41,502
Can you believe it?
1230
01:01:41,603 --> 01:01:44,972
I mean, he's funny but--
1231
01:01:45,072 --> 01:01:47,474
Wait, please don't tell Max
that I ratted him out.
1232
01:01:47,576 --> 01:01:49,476
I'm not strong.
1233
01:01:49,578 --> 01:01:50,444
-Ow!
-Stop whining!
1234
01:01:50,545 --> 01:01:51,979
God.
1235
01:01:52,079 --> 01:01:53,747
Meet me in the car.
I've got some unfinished
business.
1236
01:01:53,847 --> 01:01:55,916
Please, please,
don't leave me alone with him.
1237
01:01:59,153 --> 01:02:02,423
Okay, I'm going to put this
in as loving a way as possible.
1238
01:02:03,257 --> 01:02:04,758
You need help!
1239
01:02:04,858 --> 01:02:06,695
Oh, hi, this is Jayne Green's
assistant.
1240
01:02:06,794 --> 01:02:10,397
I was wanting to confirm
the date and time
for Max Bernal's appearance.
1241
01:02:12,900 --> 01:02:15,736
Yes, I, uh, accidentally
deleted an email.
1242
01:02:18,472 --> 01:02:20,675
Oh, great! Thank you so much.
1243
01:02:20,774 --> 01:02:22,409
Appreciate it. Take care.
1244
01:02:23,811 --> 01:02:24,979
Let's go.
1245
01:02:32,052 --> 01:02:33,454
I'm gonna get a coffee.
1246
01:02:33,555 --> 01:02:36,190
-Ooh, there's candy.
-Hey, you've had enough sugar.
1247
01:02:38,125 --> 01:02:39,527
Uh, can I have a black coffee
please?
1248
01:02:39,628 --> 01:02:41,028
-Sure thing.
-Thanks.
1249
01:02:43,531 --> 01:02:47,801
Hey, dude, where can I get
a local motel you can suggest?
1250
01:02:47,901 --> 01:02:49,837
Uh, yeah,
you got the Jersey plates,
right?
1251
01:02:49,937 --> 01:02:51,171
-Uh-huh.
-'71 El Do?
1252
01:02:51,272 --> 01:02:52,406
-Yeah.
-Sweet.
1253
01:02:52,773 --> 01:02:55,776
Yeah. Hey, hey, sir, you--
you got a great-- great eye for
cars.
1254
01:02:55,876 --> 01:02:58,345
Ah, only sort of.
Uh, my grandma's got an El Do.
1255
01:02:58,445 --> 01:03:01,015
So, five exits, Best Western,
includes breakfast and biscuits.
1256
01:03:01,115 --> 01:03:02,816
-Oh. Great. Which way? That way?
-That way.
1257
01:03:02,916 --> 01:03:04,818
Hey, look, I'm on TV!
1258
01:03:05,386 --> 01:03:07,689
Yeah, look at that, buddy.
Your commercial's running
everywhere.
1259
01:03:07,788 --> 01:03:09,023
-This should help.
-Yeah.
1260
01:03:09,123 --> 01:03:10,692
Child actor, we're on our way
to Hollywood
1261
01:03:10,791 --> 01:03:12,126
for a big screen test.
1262
01:03:12,226 --> 01:03:13,294
-Not true.
-Why don't you go
1263
01:03:13,394 --> 01:03:15,664
-wait for me in the car, yeah?
-Hey, wait!
1264
01:03:16,096 --> 01:03:18,767
Have I seen you in anything?
1265
01:03:18,866 --> 01:03:22,136
Sanford and Son. It will be
remade!
1266
01:03:23,904 --> 01:03:26,140
Hey, let me get your autograph.
Sign it "To Tim."
1267
01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:28,175
"You'll never catch me alive,
Tim!"
1268
01:03:40,722 --> 01:03:43,157
DUI Checkpoint. What the
hell?
1269
01:03:56,103 --> 01:03:57,739
- Whoa!
- What's wrong?
1270
01:03:57,838 --> 01:03:59,440
Nothing! Go back to sleep,
buddy.
1271
01:03:59,541 --> 01:04:01,041
-Come on, it's late.
-What are you doing?
1272
01:04:01,141 --> 01:04:03,010
-Just taking a shortcut.
-To where?
1273
01:04:03,110 --> 01:04:05,913
-Best campsite in Nebraska.
-This isn't a shortcut!
1274
01:04:06,013 --> 01:04:07,381
-Yeah, it is!
-No, it's not!
1275
01:04:07,481 --> 01:04:09,917
I can see the road right
there-- shit!
1276
01:04:10,017 --> 01:04:11,952
Fuck!
1277
01:04:12,052 --> 01:04:14,121
Ez? Ez, where are ya? You okay?
1278
01:04:14,221 --> 01:04:15,989
Ezzie?
1279
01:04:16,090 --> 01:04:17,592
I want to go home!
1280
01:04:17,692 --> 01:04:18,926
Ez.
1281
01:04:19,026 --> 01:04:22,930
Ez! Fuck! Fuck! Hey, come on,
buddy!
1282
01:04:25,199 --> 01:04:26,100
Okay.
1283
01:04:27,034 --> 01:04:28,335
Come on, where are you?
1284
01:04:29,136 --> 01:04:30,037
Ez?
1285
01:04:31,271 --> 01:04:32,005
Ezzie?
1286
01:04:35,376 --> 01:04:36,310
Fuck!
1287
01:04:39,413 --> 01:04:40,481
Ezzie!
1288
01:04:45,219 --> 01:04:46,387
Ezzie!
1289
01:04:56,731 --> 01:04:57,998
Ez!
1290
01:05:04,572 --> 01:05:05,840
Ezzie!
1291
01:05:15,983 --> 01:05:17,451
- Hey! Stop!
- No!
1292
01:05:17,552 --> 01:05:18,820
Stop!
1293
01:05:19,319 --> 01:05:21,355
-Hey! Hey! I said stop, okay?
-Ow!
1294
01:05:21,455 --> 01:05:23,591
Stop! I said stop!
1295
01:05:23,691 --> 01:05:25,560
I told you to stop!
1296
01:05:25,660 --> 01:05:27,161
What are you gonna do?
1297
01:05:27,662 --> 01:05:30,665
Hit me? You wanna hit me? Come
on, hit me!
1298
01:05:30,765 --> 01:05:32,099
No! I'm-- I'm not, I'm not.
1299
01:05:32,199 --> 01:05:33,467
No, I just-- you scared me,
buddy.
1300
01:05:33,568 --> 01:05:35,870
You freaked me out. I'm sorry.
Okay?
1301
01:05:35,969 --> 01:05:37,806
Why did you take me?
1302
01:05:38,205 --> 01:05:40,575
Why did you take me
if you don't know how to help
me?
1303
01:05:40,675 --> 01:05:42,209
I don't know, buddy.
1304
01:05:42,309 --> 01:05:44,378
You're my superhero.
I just-- you're everything.
1305
01:05:44,478 --> 01:05:46,113
You're my mojo.
1306
01:05:46,213 --> 01:05:48,783
I'm not your superhero!
1307
01:05:48,883 --> 01:05:51,018
I'm not your mojo! I'm not your
buddy!
1308
01:05:51,118 --> 01:05:53,420
I'm your son! And you're my dad!
1309
01:05:53,521 --> 01:05:56,691
My dad! My dad! My dad! My dad!
My dad!
1310
01:05:56,791 --> 01:05:59,159
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
1311
01:05:59,259 --> 01:06:01,128
- I hate you.
- It's okay.
1312
01:06:01,228 --> 01:06:04,097
I hate you.
1313
01:06:37,799 --> 01:06:39,601
- Hello?
- Pop?
1314
01:06:41,536 --> 01:06:42,503
Hello?
1315
01:06:42,604 --> 01:06:43,905
I almost hit my kid.
1316
01:06:44,004 --> 01:06:45,272
Wh-- what happened?
1317
01:06:46,039 --> 01:06:47,174
What h-- what happened?
1318
01:06:47,274 --> 01:06:48,943
-I-- I almost--
-What?
1319
01:06:49,042 --> 01:06:50,645
I almost hit Ezra.
1320
01:06:50,979 --> 01:06:52,647
Where are you? Shit.
1321
01:06:52,747 --> 01:06:56,316
-I-- I'm in the-- I'm in thewoods.
-Where, where, where?
1322
01:06:56,416 --> 01:06:58,085
The fucking woods.
I don't know where, okay?
1323
01:06:58,185 --> 01:07:01,221
I just-- I almost hit Ezra, and
I--
1324
01:07:01,321 --> 01:07:02,657
I don't know where to put all
this, Pop.
1325
01:07:02,757 --> 01:07:05,425
I don't know where to put
all this fucking rage.
1326
01:07:05,827 --> 01:07:09,162
You don't put it anywhere.
You just-- you bury it.
1327
01:07:09,531 --> 01:07:12,834
Yeah, okay.
But I'm asking you, what do I
do?
1328
01:07:12,934 --> 01:07:13,968
You know what to do!
You can't--
1329
01:07:14,067 --> 01:07:15,402
I don't.I don't know what to do, man.
1330
01:07:15,502 --> 01:07:17,337
I'm in a forest,I'm losing my shit,
1331
01:07:17,437 --> 01:07:19,641
and I don't know what to do,so I thought that maybe,
1332
01:07:19,741 --> 01:07:21,408
just maybe you might just be
like a normal dad
1333
01:07:21,509 --> 01:07:22,577
and give me some fucking
advice!
1334
01:07:22,777 --> 01:07:24,177
Max, shut up.What are you talking about?
1335
01:07:24,278 --> 01:07:25,747
I'm trying to talk to you about
it now.
1336
01:07:25,847 --> 01:07:26,848
And then you want some advice?
1337
01:07:26,948 --> 01:07:28,016
I'll give you some advice.
1338
01:07:28,115 --> 01:07:29,383
It's this simple.
1339
01:07:29,483 --> 01:07:31,553
Bite your arm off, tie yourself
to a tree,
1340
01:07:31,653 --> 01:07:34,121
do whatever you need to do
to not hit your kid.
1341
01:07:34,221 --> 01:07:36,056
It's that simple.
1342
01:07:37,291 --> 01:07:38,425
You understand?
1343
01:07:38,526 --> 01:07:40,294
Look what happened with us.
It killed me.
1344
01:07:40,394 --> 01:07:42,630
You cannot hit him. You cannot
hit him!
1345
01:07:44,899 --> 01:07:46,801
Okay, I-- Yeah, I get it.
1346
01:07:47,467 --> 01:07:48,703
Are you sure you do?Because if you did,
1347
01:07:48,803 --> 01:07:50,070
you'd know it's timeto throw in the towel
1348
01:07:50,170 --> 01:07:51,204
on this stupid trip.
1349
01:07:51,305 --> 01:07:53,007
-It's not a stupid trip.
- Yes, it is.
1350
01:07:53,106 --> 01:07:54,576
It's not, Pop. It's not stupid.
1351
01:07:54,676 --> 01:07:57,177
Yes, it is. It's stupid.
1352
01:07:57,277 --> 01:07:59,446
How are you gonna feel
if you end up back in jail?
1353
01:07:59,547 --> 01:08:00,447
Then what?
1354
01:08:03,150 --> 01:08:05,152
Where are you? I'll come getyou.
1355
01:08:10,558 --> 01:08:12,694
Fuck. Fuck.
1356
01:08:46,226 --> 01:08:47,895
You can't even say the
word.
1357
01:08:47,996 --> 01:08:49,196
It's just a word.
1358
01:08:50,130 --> 01:08:51,264
Autism.
1359
01:08:53,333 --> 01:08:54,736
Yeah, whatever.
1360
01:08:56,871 --> 01:09:01,408
Saying it out loud,
it'll help Ezzie in his life.
1361
01:09:01,509 --> 01:09:05,412
Nah, you know,
I don't-- I'm not sure about
that.
1362
01:09:07,749 --> 01:09:10,551
We gotta be able
to talk about this and not...
1363
01:09:11,351 --> 01:09:12,954
Okay, tell me.
What do you want to talk about?
1364
01:09:13,054 --> 01:09:14,388
I don't want to be hiding about
it.
1365
01:09:14,488 --> 01:09:15,990
I want to talk about it.
I want to give it a name.
1366
01:09:16,090 --> 01:09:18,026
I want to get--
I want to get all the help we
can get.
1367
01:09:18,126 --> 01:09:19,927
Who's hiding? Who's hiding?
Nobody's hiding.
1368
01:09:20,028 --> 01:09:22,597
Max is hiding him right now!
He took him, he's hiding him!
1369
01:09:22,697 --> 01:09:24,398
He's not hiding him,
he's taking him somewhere.
1370
01:09:24,498 --> 01:09:26,400
You think he's gonna kill him?
He's gonna--
1371
01:09:26,500 --> 01:09:28,536
I don't think--
of course I don't think that.
1372
01:09:28,636 --> 01:09:31,438
- I don't think that, but he
scared me.
1373
01:09:31,539 --> 01:09:33,908
You know he's gonna take him
somewhere or do something.
1374
01:09:34,008 --> 01:09:36,544
But that doesn't mean
he's gonna do anything bad to
him.
1375
01:09:36,644 --> 01:09:37,612
I don't know.
1376
01:09:37,712 --> 01:09:39,446
The fragility of Max
and his mental state,
1377
01:09:39,547 --> 01:09:42,517
and his situ-- he's--
he flies off the handle.
1378
01:09:42,617 --> 01:09:44,652
He doesn't know how to control
Ezzie.
1379
01:09:44,752 --> 01:09:46,754
He doesn't know everything that
he needs.
1380
01:09:46,854 --> 01:09:49,389
No, he doesn't.
But neither do you. Nobody
knows.
1381
01:09:49,489 --> 01:09:51,025
-I--
-It's what it is.
1382
01:09:51,125 --> 01:09:52,860
It's a condition that just is
there.
1383
01:09:54,095 --> 01:09:55,429
We have to deal with it.
1384
01:09:55,530 --> 01:09:57,131
And I know you--
I know you think
1385
01:09:57,230 --> 01:09:59,299
my side gave him
what you say he's got.
1386
01:09:59,399 --> 01:10:00,835
-I never said that.
-You didn't have to.
1387
01:10:00,935 --> 01:10:02,136
I never said that.
1388
01:10:02,537 --> 01:10:04,105
And my wife did the same thing.
I had the same fights with her.
1389
01:10:04,204 --> 01:10:06,406
-Do not compare me to his
mother.
-I'm not comparing you, but--
1390
01:10:06,507 --> 01:10:07,709
Don't compare me to his mother.
1391
01:10:07,809 --> 01:10:10,011
I'm not comparing you,
but there is a similarity.
1392
01:10:10,111 --> 01:10:12,212
I'm sorry. It is what it is.
1393
01:10:12,312 --> 01:10:13,981
I devoted my life to this
family.
1394
01:10:14,082 --> 01:10:17,852
I'm devoting my life to this
family.
That woman abandoned him.
1395
01:10:18,886 --> 01:10:21,488
I don't even know what happened
because you don't talk about it,
1396
01:10:21,589 --> 01:10:24,291
and Max doesn't talk about it,
so nobody talks about anything.
1397
01:10:24,391 --> 01:10:26,561
But-- but what she did was
unforgivable.
1398
01:10:27,360 --> 01:10:28,663
Don't compare me to her.
1399
01:10:30,064 --> 01:10:31,231
How dare you.
1400
01:10:31,331 --> 01:10:33,735
It was a--
1401
01:10:33,835 --> 01:10:36,771
it was a long time ago,
so it's all over with now.
1402
01:10:45,680 --> 01:10:47,849
I can't believe
you grew up around here.
1403
01:10:47,949 --> 01:10:49,249
Yeah, I know, right?
1404
01:10:49,650 --> 01:10:51,251
Pop-Pop met my mother in New
York,
1405
01:10:51,351 --> 01:10:53,420
and then, well, we all moved to
Nebraska.
1406
01:10:53,521 --> 01:10:54,789
Why did your mother leave?
1407
01:10:58,659 --> 01:11:01,394
Uh, you know, it's funny, buddy.
1408
01:11:01,495 --> 01:11:03,231
I-- I don't really know.
1409
01:11:03,330 --> 01:11:04,397
That's not funny.
1410
01:11:05,700 --> 01:11:07,334
You're right. It's not funny.
1411
01:11:09,971 --> 01:11:12,740
You know, I just--
I woke up one morning, and she
was gone.
1412
01:11:14,876 --> 01:11:17,078
And I guess, uh,
1413
01:11:17,178 --> 01:11:18,478
I guess after so many years,
1414
01:11:18,579 --> 01:11:20,081
I just worked it out for myself
1415
01:11:20,181 --> 01:11:22,683
that she must have been
pretty sad
1416
01:11:24,152 --> 01:11:25,686
to do something like that,
right?
1417
01:11:26,621 --> 01:11:29,056
She was a terrible mother.
1418
01:11:32,425 --> 01:11:33,694
You're right. She was.
1419
01:11:36,296 --> 01:11:37,364
She was.
1420
01:11:40,902 --> 01:11:43,137
All right, come on. Let's
go.
1421
01:11:43,237 --> 01:11:44,471
Hey, folks, thank you again.
1422
01:11:44,572 --> 01:11:47,108
- Thank you so much.
- Bye. Be safe now.
1423
01:11:47,208 --> 01:11:48,576
What a nice couple.
1424
01:11:49,143 --> 01:11:52,445
I bet-- I bet they've been
together
since they were your age.
1425
01:11:52,547 --> 01:11:56,050
-I'm going to die a virgin.
-What? No, that's bullshit.
1426
01:11:56,517 --> 01:11:59,987
Someone out there who loves
dinosaurs,
1427
01:12:00,087 --> 01:12:02,290
Dostoevsky and Family Guy.
1428
01:12:02,389 --> 01:12:04,759
-You watch.
-And live action D&D.
1429
01:12:04,859 --> 01:12:08,162
And live action D&D.
There you go. You know what you
want.
1430
01:12:08,796 --> 01:12:11,732
What are we doing here?
1431
01:12:11,833 --> 01:12:15,970
The lady who lives here
is an old friend of your dad's.
1432
01:12:16,771 --> 01:12:19,173
This place looks like
a demon movie waiting to happen.
1433
01:12:19,273 --> 01:12:21,809
Let's hope not, huh?
1434
01:12:21,909 --> 01:12:24,545
Ah!
1435
01:12:28,649 --> 01:12:30,383
-Oh, my God!
-Oh, hey!
1436
01:12:30,483 --> 01:12:32,687
-Hi.
-What--
1437
01:12:32,787 --> 01:12:35,256
- Hi.
- Oh, no!
1438
01:12:35,355 --> 01:12:36,891
-Hi!
-Hi, Grace. Hi!
1439
01:12:36,991 --> 01:12:38,025
What are you doing here?
1440
01:12:38,125 --> 01:12:40,127
That's a-- that's a long story.
1441
01:12:40,228 --> 01:12:43,731
Um, Grace, this is Ezra.
1442
01:12:46,234 --> 01:12:48,035
Nice to meet you, Ezra.
1443
01:12:48,135 --> 01:12:49,502
Heard a lot about you.
1444
01:12:50,738 --> 01:12:52,773
- I've never heard about you.
- Yeah.
1445
01:12:52,874 --> 01:12:54,642
- Who's here, Mom?
- Oh, wow.
1446
01:12:54,742 --> 01:12:57,211
- You're--
- This is my Ruby.
1447
01:12:57,311 --> 01:12:59,013
Way different from your baby
picture.
1448
01:12:59,113 --> 01:13:00,014
I hope so.
1449
01:13:00,114 --> 01:13:02,149
- Hi.
- -This is an old friend, Max.
1450
01:13:02,250 --> 01:13:03,651
And his son Ezra.
1451
01:13:04,652 --> 01:13:05,853
Hi.
1452
01:13:05,953 --> 01:13:08,022
Do you wanna come play with
Harper and me?
1453
01:13:12,260 --> 01:13:13,761
Come on! Harper!
1454
01:13:15,263 --> 01:13:17,265
-This is a surprise.
-Yeah, I know.
1455
01:13:17,365 --> 01:13:20,768
-Mm.
-You think we can go inside?
1456
01:13:20,868 --> 01:13:23,371
I'm kind of a fugitive from the
law.
1457
01:13:23,470 --> 01:13:24,972
-What the hell?
-I'm not joking.
1458
01:13:25,907 --> 01:13:26,908
Come on!
1459
01:13:32,980 --> 01:13:34,015
Harper!
1460
01:13:37,885 --> 01:13:38,753
Does...
1461
01:13:39,887 --> 01:13:42,256
does Harper always follow you?
1462
01:13:42,356 --> 01:13:43,456
All the time.
1463
01:13:43,557 --> 01:13:45,326
Lucky dog.
1464
01:13:45,626 --> 01:13:48,796
Get off of me!
1465
01:13:48,896 --> 01:13:52,333
Ridgeway has tried to push me
into Jack's pond.
1466
01:13:52,432 --> 01:13:54,335
- You loved it!
- You wish!
1467
01:13:54,434 --> 01:13:57,638
- You moving on my girl, man?
-Uh, I'm not his girl.
1468
01:13:59,240 --> 01:14:00,608
Introduce us, Rubes.
1469
01:14:00,708 --> 01:14:03,911
-Ezra, Ridgeway and Cally.
-Where are you from?
1470
01:14:06,280 --> 01:14:07,782
He's from back east.
1471
01:14:08,182 --> 01:14:09,650
Wow, look at him go.
1472
01:14:09,750 --> 01:14:12,753
Please don't be a dick.
1473
01:14:12,853 --> 01:14:15,823
"No one cared who I was
until I put on the mask."
1474
01:14:15,923 --> 01:14:18,793
That was pretty random, freak.
1475
01:14:18,893 --> 01:14:21,662
"Who is Bane? Why does he wear
the mask?"
1476
01:14:21,762 --> 01:14:23,130
Dark Knight is my obsession.
1477
01:14:25,199 --> 01:14:26,100
Let's go.
1478
01:14:28,102 --> 01:14:29,236
So tell me again.
1479
01:14:29,337 --> 01:14:31,639
Oh, I just ran out of patience.
1480
01:14:31,739 --> 01:14:33,140
Which happens to all parents.
1481
01:14:33,240 --> 01:14:35,543
Yeah, but what I was seeing--
1482
01:14:35,643 --> 01:14:36,711
He wasn't safe.
1483
01:14:38,346 --> 01:14:39,479
And now he is?
1484
01:14:43,184 --> 01:14:44,552
Appears safe to me.
1485
01:14:47,355 --> 01:14:50,791
-Ugh... I don't know, Max.
-What?
1486
01:14:50,891 --> 01:14:52,193
Why don't you let me call Jenna?
1487
01:14:52,293 --> 01:14:54,228
No, no, no, no.
Look, I already called her,
okay?
1488
01:14:54,328 --> 01:14:55,529
She knows he's okay.
1489
01:14:57,965 --> 01:14:58,866
Okay.
1490
01:14:59,499 --> 01:15:00,668
Yeah.
1491
01:15:01,068 --> 01:15:03,671
I'm not gonna fight you on it,
all right?
1492
01:15:03,771 --> 01:15:06,307
So eat your sandwich, wash up,
1493
01:15:06,407 --> 01:15:08,042
and hitchhike off to LA.
1494
01:15:09,543 --> 01:15:12,680
Look, I know this all seems
insane, but...
1495
01:15:12,780 --> 01:15:14,749
-Yeah.
-...I didn't know where else to
go.
1496
01:15:14,849 --> 01:15:15,916
So...
1497
01:15:17,151 --> 01:15:19,186
So let me help you.
1498
01:15:19,286 --> 01:15:22,556
I can't-- I got-- I gotta
finish this, Grace.
1499
01:15:22,656 --> 01:15:25,493
I do, you know. That kid is--
1500
01:15:26,127 --> 01:15:27,895
is the one thing that I can't
get wrong.
1501
01:15:27,995 --> 01:15:29,697
That's right. That's right, you
can't.
1502
01:15:29,797 --> 01:15:31,499
-Because he's perfect.
-No.
1503
01:15:31,866 --> 01:15:33,667
He's not, Grace. He's not
perfect.
1504
01:15:33,768 --> 01:15:36,070
And everybody's trying to make
him be
1505
01:15:36,170 --> 01:15:37,304
just like everybody else.
1506
01:15:37,405 --> 01:15:39,440
Me included, right?
1507
01:15:39,540 --> 01:15:41,675
And then
one day he might magically wake
up
1508
01:15:41,776 --> 01:15:44,979
and become the coolest, most
amped up
1509
01:15:45,079 --> 01:15:49,183
and normal kid
that's ever walked the face of
the earth.
1510
01:15:49,283 --> 01:15:50,785
And that is not gonna happen.
1511
01:15:52,420 --> 01:15:53,320
It's not.
1512
01:16:00,194 --> 01:16:01,495
It's not. It's never gonna
happen.
1513
01:16:01,595 --> 01:16:02,630
So, I have to protect him,
1514
01:16:02,730 --> 01:16:04,932
you know, and if I can't
protect him,
1515
01:16:05,032 --> 01:16:06,667
well, then, he's not gonna make
it.
1516
01:16:06,767 --> 01:16:08,235
And I--
1517
01:16:20,481 --> 01:16:22,917
Do you want caramel or fudge?
1518
01:16:24,051 --> 01:16:25,119
Both.
1519
01:16:25,219 --> 01:16:26,987
You're so bad.
1520
01:16:27,688 --> 01:16:29,857
Oh, my God! You have to try
this, Ezra!
1521
01:16:31,192 --> 01:16:33,127
Come on. I won't take no for an
answer.
1522
01:16:34,295 --> 01:16:35,629
Uh-uh.
1523
01:16:38,332 --> 01:16:39,333
You won't regret it.
1524
01:16:43,404 --> 01:16:45,106
♪ Torn down ♪
1525
01:16:45,206 --> 01:16:46,107
How good is that?
1526
01:16:46,207 --> 01:16:48,309
♪ Full of aching ♪
1527
01:16:48,409 --> 01:16:49,578
♪ Somehow ♪
1528
01:16:49,677 --> 01:16:50,845
You okay?
1529
01:16:50,945 --> 01:16:53,414
♪ Our youth would take theblame ♪
1530
01:16:53,515 --> 01:16:54,682
♪ Worn out ♪
1531
01:16:54,782 --> 01:16:56,450
Yeah, I mean, nobody
uses it.
1532
01:16:56,551 --> 01:16:58,719
Oh, my God.
1533
01:17:00,354 --> 01:17:02,123
-Here she is!
-Oh!
1534
01:17:02,223 --> 01:17:03,157
I gotta lay hands on her.
1535
01:17:03,257 --> 01:17:04,892
Oh, I'm getting the vibes.
1536
01:17:04,992 --> 01:17:06,528
We did everything in this
bucket.
1537
01:17:06,660 --> 01:17:08,696
You know what?
1538
01:17:08,796 --> 01:17:10,064
If she starts, take her.
1539
01:17:11,198 --> 01:17:12,466
-Really?
-Mm-hmm.
1540
01:17:12,567 --> 01:17:14,168
Okay. Thank you.
1541
01:17:14,603 --> 01:17:17,738
I'll-- I'll get it back to you
just as soon all this blows
over.
1542
01:17:17,838 --> 01:17:19,640
It's okay. It's gonna be fine,
Max.
1543
01:17:20,542 --> 01:17:21,675
It's gonna be fine.
1544
01:17:22,009 --> 01:17:24,111
You just need to stop biting
the dog.
1545
01:17:25,246 --> 01:17:26,447
♪ Climb down ♪
1546
01:17:26,548 --> 01:17:28,649
-What-- what do you mean?
-Sixth grade.
1547
01:17:28,749 --> 01:17:31,852
A dog was coming toward us,
and you bit the dog.
1548
01:17:31,952 --> 01:17:32,753
Oh!
1549
01:17:32,853 --> 01:17:34,455
-Yeah, well--
-You bit it.
1550
01:17:34,556 --> 01:17:36,190
I was-- I was trying to protect
you.
1551
01:17:36,290 --> 01:17:38,225
-Oh, right. Come on!
-I was protecting you.
1552
01:17:38,325 --> 01:17:41,495
Come on! I mean, the dog
wasn't even gonna bite me or
you.
1553
01:17:41,596 --> 01:17:44,533
The poor thing ran off
with its tail between its legs.
1554
01:17:44,633 --> 01:17:46,066
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
1555
01:17:48,435 --> 01:17:51,205
Listen, not everyone
is trying to bite you, Max.
1556
01:17:54,609 --> 01:17:56,310
♪ Hallowed ♪
1557
01:17:56,677 --> 01:17:58,045
You want to feed him?
1558
01:17:59,680 --> 01:18:01,215
Have you ever ridden one before?
1559
01:18:03,784 --> 01:18:05,319
How would you feel if you left
here
1560
01:18:05,419 --> 01:18:07,788
and didn't even pet
one of these gorgeous animals?
1561
01:18:07,888 --> 01:18:09,156
Like a loser.
1562
01:18:10,090 --> 01:18:11,125
Okay.
1563
01:18:11,225 --> 01:18:13,928
So, let's start with how to
greet a horse.
1564
01:18:14,495 --> 01:18:17,532
You approach a horse from the
side
so he can see you.
1565
01:18:17,965 --> 01:18:20,834
Then you pat him right here
on the side of his face.
1566
01:18:21,368 --> 01:18:25,372
Then you say in the nicest way,
"Hello, Bosco."
1567
01:18:29,710 --> 01:18:31,178
Hello, pasture king.
1568
01:18:34,748 --> 01:18:36,850
I bet he likes pastures.
1569
01:18:36,951 --> 01:18:38,485
And he likes you.
1570
01:18:38,587 --> 01:18:39,588
You can tell?
1571
01:18:39,688 --> 01:18:40,854
You bet.
1572
01:18:42,089 --> 01:18:43,658
Just look him in the eye.
1573
01:18:44,491 --> 01:18:47,529
Looking a horse in the eye
is like sharing your soul.
1574
01:18:56,103 --> 01:18:57,805
You just made a friend for life.
1575
01:18:57,905 --> 01:19:03,612
♪ I will carry you always ♪
1576
01:19:03,712 --> 01:19:06,146
Uh, Mom, Tom's at the door.
1577
01:19:07,281 --> 01:19:09,316
- Ooh!
- Who's Tom?
1578
01:19:09,416 --> 01:19:11,686
-All right, uh, Max, keys are
in the car.
-Okay.
1579
01:19:11,785 --> 01:19:13,787
Cally, Ridgeway, show him the
horse trail.
1580
01:19:13,887 --> 01:19:15,657
-Ruby, take Ezra, go get his
bags.
-Okay.
1581
01:19:15,756 --> 01:19:17,758
Go. Go! Go!
1582
01:19:17,858 --> 01:19:19,360
Okay, don't forget your
dinosaur, okay?
1583
01:19:19,460 --> 01:19:20,928
- Go, go.
- Hey.
1584
01:19:22,296 --> 01:19:23,230
I'm sorry.
1585
01:19:25,032 --> 01:19:26,467
That's okay.
1586
01:19:40,515 --> 01:19:43,851
-Hey, Tom, what's up?
-Sorry to bother you, Grace.
1587
01:19:43,951 --> 01:19:45,019
I got a couple swear
1588
01:19:45,119 --> 01:19:46,353
they gave a father and kid
a ride
1589
01:19:46,453 --> 01:19:47,555
and dropped them off here.
1590
01:19:47,656 --> 01:19:49,957
Seems the father
kidnapped the kid from New
Jersey.
1591
01:19:50,057 --> 01:19:52,594
That's horrible. What can I do?
1592
01:19:53,093 --> 01:19:54,828
I'm sorry.
Would you mind if I had a look
around?
1593
01:19:54,928 --> 01:19:57,766
-This woman's really upset.
-No, not at all. Come on in,
Tom.
1594
01:19:57,865 --> 01:19:59,567
-Yeah.
-Thanks. It'll just be a minute.
1595
01:20:04,872 --> 01:20:07,174
- Hey! Don't flood it!
- Okay.
1596
01:20:11,680 --> 01:20:13,280
I guess this is it.
1597
01:20:29,564 --> 01:20:31,465
All right, you two, get a room!
1598
01:20:33,635 --> 01:20:38,172
"I don't mean to be rude,
but that was not as easy as it
looked,
1599
01:20:38,272 --> 01:20:41,342
so I would appreciate it
if you wouldn't distract me."
1600
01:20:41,743 --> 01:20:42,943
The Princess Bride.
1601
01:20:44,011 --> 01:20:45,179
Kid's a genius.
1602
01:21:00,027 --> 01:21:01,161
Can we get a horse?
1603
01:21:03,464 --> 01:21:04,532
Dude, we live in Hoboken.
1604
01:21:07,067 --> 01:21:08,570
Yeah. That's what I thought.
1605
01:21:10,638 --> 01:21:14,241
Hey, Ez, you understand
why I'm doing this, don't you?
1606
01:21:14,341 --> 01:21:16,544
Of course, you want to be on
Jimmy Kimmel.
1607
01:21:16,644 --> 01:21:17,612
Any father would.
1608
01:21:17,712 --> 01:21:19,880
No, no. That's not it.
1609
01:21:20,515 --> 01:21:24,251
I mean, s-sure, but it's more
than that.
1610
01:21:24,351 --> 01:21:26,755
You know, um...
1611
01:21:26,855 --> 01:21:29,256
you know how Pop-Pop gave up
being a chef
1612
01:21:29,356 --> 01:21:32,259
and then he took that job as a
doorman?
1613
01:21:32,893 --> 01:21:34,629
Well, he did that for me.
1614
01:21:37,131 --> 01:21:38,767
That makes no sense.
1615
01:21:39,299 --> 01:21:43,337
Well, that makes perfect sense,
actually, buddy.
1616
01:21:43,904 --> 01:21:45,038
Because--
1617
01:21:46,373 --> 01:21:49,677
because, you know, a dad's job
1618
01:21:49,778 --> 01:21:52,312
is to take his son down the
field.
1619
01:21:52,814 --> 01:21:55,482
-What field?
-Any field, you know?
1620
01:21:55,583 --> 01:21:56,584
Football field.
1621
01:21:56,684 --> 01:21:58,318
Football causes brain injuries.
1622
01:21:58,419 --> 01:22:01,890
Okay, that's true, but in this
case,
it's a metaphor, right?
1623
01:22:01,989 --> 01:22:06,126
-Right.
-So-- so a dad's gotta--
1624
01:22:06,226 --> 01:22:07,928
he's gotta go down that field,
right?
1625
01:22:08,028 --> 01:22:11,131
And-- and if he gets tackled
before he scores--
1626
01:22:11,231 --> 01:22:14,001
-Game over.
-Except that it's not.
1627
01:22:14,101 --> 01:22:15,837
'Cause all that dad wants,
right,
1628
01:22:15,936 --> 01:22:21,275
is... is for that kid to pick
up the ball
where his dad got tackled
1629
01:22:21,375 --> 01:22:23,010
and to take it the rest of the
way.
1630
01:22:23,110 --> 01:22:24,411
-Touchdown!
-Exactly.
1631
01:22:24,512 --> 01:22:26,681
He's gotta keep going until he
scores.
1632
01:22:30,752 --> 01:22:31,653
Anyway...
1633
01:22:34,388 --> 01:22:36,056
that's why I'm going to Kimmel.
1634
01:22:42,730 --> 01:22:43,731
You're a good dad.
1635
01:23:24,304 --> 01:23:28,543
You want some coffee?
1636
01:23:28,643 --> 01:23:29,744
Yeah. Love some.
1637
01:23:31,513 --> 01:23:33,515
Why don't you get a table
in the House of Pies over there.
1638
01:23:33,615 --> 01:23:36,450
I'll meet you right there.
I just wanna fill it up.
1639
01:23:36,718 --> 01:23:38,385
I'll see you inside.
1640
01:23:38,485 --> 01:23:39,554
See you inside.
1641
01:23:39,888 --> 01:23:40,922
What do you wanna drink?
1642
01:23:41,021 --> 01:23:42,724
"Life's a sport, drink it up."
1643
01:23:42,824 --> 01:23:44,191
Okay. What's that code for?
1644
01:23:44,291 --> 01:23:46,561
"Looks like we've got
another mystery on our hands."
1645
01:23:46,661 --> 01:23:50,097
I love the quotes, okay,
but not for every situation,
right?
1646
01:23:50,197 --> 01:23:52,499
This nice lady's got her work
to do.
1647
01:23:52,600 --> 01:23:54,034
Iced tea, please.
1648
01:23:55,837 --> 01:23:57,037
My man, Ezra.
1649
01:23:57,137 --> 01:23:59,941
Dropping quotes and flying
without a net
1650
01:24:00,040 --> 01:24:02,510
so that he could order himself
a--
1651
01:24:02,610 --> 01:24:04,044
"Iced tea, please."
1652
01:24:14,522 --> 01:24:17,625
-Where you going?
-Hey, what's going on?
1653
01:24:17,725 --> 01:24:18,927
My name's Ezra.
1654
01:24:19,027 --> 01:24:21,261
And I'm going to tell you all a
joke.
1655
01:24:22,429 --> 01:24:24,532
Where do horses go when they're
sick?
1656
01:24:25,867 --> 01:24:27,501
To the horsepital!
1657
01:24:30,638 --> 01:24:31,706
Yeah.
1658
01:24:31,806 --> 01:24:34,308
Thank you!
You've been a wonderful
audience!
1659
01:24:35,977 --> 01:24:38,278
Wow. First original joke.
1660
01:24:38,378 --> 01:24:40,982
-I'm proud of you.
-New material is not easy.
1661
01:24:53,828 --> 01:24:57,197
Hey, buddy, I'm gonna go,
um, wash my hands, okay?
1662
01:24:57,297 --> 01:24:58,566
-I'll be right back.
-Okay.
1663
01:24:58,666 --> 01:24:59,867
Okay.
1664
01:25:01,736 --> 01:25:02,604
To the horsepital.
1665
01:25:04,237 --> 01:25:05,172
To the horsepital.
1666
01:25:05,272 --> 01:25:06,507
What are you doing here?
1667
01:25:06,608 --> 01:25:07,742
Never mind that.
Listen, I need to--
1668
01:25:07,976 --> 01:25:09,376
-How did you find me?
-We don't have time for this.
1669
01:25:09,476 --> 01:25:10,878
How did you find me all the
way out here?
1670
01:25:10,979 --> 01:25:12,614
We were at the House of Pies.
I saw you over there.
1671
01:25:12,714 --> 01:25:14,816
-Who? We who?
-Me and Jenna. She's there.
1672
01:25:14,916 --> 01:25:16,651
-It's okay.
-Je-- Okay.
1673
01:25:16,751 --> 01:25:18,987
Oh, Pop, you got some balls.
Listen to me.
1674
01:25:19,087 --> 01:25:20,454
-Will you shut up?
-No, you shut up.
1675
01:25:20,555 --> 01:25:21,956
I'm trying to tell you
something.
1676
01:25:22,056 --> 01:25:23,290
You go back
to the House of Pies,
1677
01:25:23,390 --> 01:25:24,659
and you never saw me.
1678
01:25:24,759 --> 01:25:26,326
Shut up. I'm trying to tell you
something.
1679
01:25:26,426 --> 01:25:27,795
I'm not here to stop you.
1680
01:25:31,733 --> 01:25:34,068
I'm here to apologize.
1681
01:25:34,167 --> 01:25:36,169
-For what?
-Well-- Look.
1682
01:25:36,269 --> 01:25:38,506
I'm sorry.
1683
01:25:38,606 --> 01:25:42,142
I-- you know, I-- that's all,
I'm sorry.
1684
01:25:42,777 --> 01:25:45,178
What are you talking about?
What happened? What?
1685
01:25:46,279 --> 01:25:48,750
Your mother left, and--
1686
01:25:48,850 --> 01:25:51,418
and I loved her, but I--
I was impossible to live with,
1687
01:25:51,519 --> 01:25:53,453
and I never really
told you about any of that, and
so, I--
1688
01:25:53,554 --> 01:25:55,188
-I'm sorry.
-What do you mean?
1689
01:25:55,288 --> 01:25:56,824
Mom left because I was a pain
in the ass.
1690
01:25:56,924 --> 01:25:59,027
-That's what you told me.
-No, I was the pain in the ass.
1691
01:25:59,127 --> 01:26:01,863
It was me. All I ever did was
fight. And every fight
I ever had
1692
01:26:01,963 --> 01:26:03,598
was against someone
I thought had it in for me.
1693
01:26:03,698 --> 01:26:05,533
And those kinds of fights
you never really win.
1694
01:26:05,633 --> 01:26:09,269
You just go from one person to
another
until there's nobody left.
1695
01:26:09,369 --> 01:26:13,141
And then when I wasn't
fighting, I was--
1696
01:26:13,240 --> 01:26:15,442
I was-- I was hiding--
I was hiding
1697
01:26:15,543 --> 01:26:17,645
in restaurant kitchens,
boxing gyms.
1698
01:26:17,745 --> 01:26:21,214
I was-- Now I'm hiding
holding doors open for
strangers.
1699
01:26:21,314 --> 01:26:23,383
I'm-- I'm-- I just--
1700
01:26:26,319 --> 01:26:28,523
I hid because I didn't know
what else
to do, I--
1701
01:26:29,824 --> 01:26:32,392
I didn't know how to do
what I see you doing.
1702
01:26:32,492 --> 01:26:33,226
What?
1703
01:26:33,326 --> 01:26:34,394
You're fighting for something
1704
01:26:34,494 --> 01:26:36,229
that means something.
1705
01:26:36,631 --> 01:26:39,466
Maybe it's too much,
but you're trying to do the
right thing.
1706
01:26:39,567 --> 01:26:41,703
And you're in the fight
of your life for your son.
1707
01:26:41,803 --> 01:26:44,072
And if you get arrested,
you're gonna get arrested.
1708
01:26:44,172 --> 01:26:46,974
But as far as I'm concerned,
you're my heavyweight champion.
1709
01:26:48,910 --> 01:26:50,310
'Cause I had a problem.
1710
01:26:51,045 --> 01:26:53,781
I had a problem with your
mother,
and I'll never forget.
1711
01:26:56,117 --> 01:26:57,785
I wish that I had done what you
did.
1712
01:26:59,520 --> 01:27:01,122
You might have to suffer
consequences,
1713
01:27:01,221 --> 01:27:04,559
but it's-- it's worth it
'cause you did it for the right
reasons.
1714
01:27:04,659 --> 01:27:07,595
You did it because you love
your kid.
1715
01:27:08,796 --> 01:27:12,133
Taking him out of the bed
in the middle of the night--
1716
01:27:12,232 --> 01:27:13,868
-A felony.
-No, no, no.
1717
01:27:13,968 --> 01:27:15,368
Took a lot of courage.
1718
01:27:15,870 --> 01:27:18,271
Believe it or not, it might've
been the best thing you ever
could've done.
1719
01:27:18,371 --> 01:27:22,143
And what you're always worried
about, not having a family,
you gotta stop that.
1720
01:27:22,242 --> 01:27:25,179
And I'm here, and Ezzie's there,
1721
01:27:25,278 --> 01:27:27,548
and the woman in the House of
Pies, well,
1722
01:27:27,648 --> 01:27:29,083
it'll all be all right with her.
1723
01:27:29,183 --> 01:27:32,186
That'll all work itself out
eventually, but you gotta know
1724
01:27:32,285 --> 01:27:33,654
that you have a family
that loves you
1725
01:27:33,755 --> 01:27:35,690
and that needs you
and that cares about you.
1726
01:27:37,024 --> 01:27:38,593
-Now be careful.
-Okay.
1727
01:27:39,093 --> 01:27:40,528
-I gotta get back.
-Okay.
1728
01:27:42,230 --> 01:27:43,463
Okay.
1729
01:27:55,676 --> 01:27:58,045
All right, so you
recognize
any of these names, buddy?
1730
01:27:58,146 --> 01:27:59,614
Yeah. Sidney Poitier.
1731
01:28:00,515 --> 01:28:03,151
"They call me Mr. Tibbs."
1732
01:28:03,251 --> 01:28:06,453
Of course. Stupid question. My
bad.
1733
01:28:06,554 --> 01:28:09,624
"Toto, I have a feeling
we're not in Kansas anymore."
1734
01:28:09,724 --> 01:28:11,826
-Dorothy is Liza Minelli's mom.
-Okay.
1735
01:28:11,926 --> 01:28:13,761
-And that's a fact.
-Pick up the pace, okay?
1736
01:28:13,861 --> 01:28:15,963
-Come on.
-"Crying?
1737
01:28:16,063 --> 01:28:18,733
There's no crying in baseball!"
1738
01:28:19,167 --> 01:28:21,636
Come on. Come on.
1739
01:28:23,604 --> 01:28:26,473
-Is Jimmy here?
-He might stop in to say hi.
1740
01:28:26,574 --> 01:28:28,142
Oh, good. My son's a big fan.
1741
01:28:28,242 --> 01:28:29,309
No, I'm not.
1742
01:28:31,012 --> 01:28:32,280
Park there.
1743
01:28:32,379 --> 01:28:34,248
- This is handicap.
- Yeah. Take the spot.
1744
01:28:34,347 --> 01:28:35,850
-It's handicap.
-Take that spot.
1745
01:28:38,686 --> 01:28:40,721
Do as much of your set
as you want for the soundcheck.
1746
01:28:40,822 --> 01:28:42,857
-How's the mojo today, good?
-Good till the last drop.
1747
01:28:42,957 --> 01:28:43,991
-Hey, Max.
-Yeah.
1748
01:28:44,091 --> 01:28:45,226
-See the box?
-Uh-huh.
1749
01:28:45,425 --> 01:28:46,627
Don't step outside the box,
don't look at Jimmy,
1750
01:28:46,727 --> 01:28:48,029
and do not go over your time.
1751
01:28:48,129 --> 01:28:49,263
-You good?
-Jesus. At ease.
1752
01:28:49,362 --> 01:28:50,698
-Batteries in this thing?
-I hope so.
1753
01:28:50,798 --> 01:28:52,867
-Ezra, I got a front row seat
for you.
-Okay.
1754
01:28:52,967 --> 01:28:55,770
Check, check, check.
Is that mic down over there?
That's it?
1755
01:28:55,870 --> 01:28:58,806
Great. Thanks.
How's everybody doing tonight?
1756
01:28:58,906 --> 01:29:01,341
Good? Hello? Ah.
1757
01:29:01,441 --> 01:29:03,644
I gotta stay in the box.
Gotta stay in the box.
1758
01:29:03,744 --> 01:29:04,745
Hi there.
1759
01:29:04,846 --> 01:29:07,347
Hi, did Max Bernal arrive
with a young boy?
1760
01:29:07,447 --> 01:29:08,883
Both very handsome.
1761
01:29:09,016 --> 01:29:11,519
Just have a way of looking at
things through a negative lens.
1762
01:29:11,619 --> 01:29:13,888
Which makes sense,
you know, I was a breach baby.
1763
01:29:13,988 --> 01:29:16,724
My dad says I came out with a
black eye.
1764
01:29:16,824 --> 01:29:18,693
He says I popped out,
and the first thing I said was,
1765
01:29:18,793 --> 01:29:20,528
- "Who thought this was a good
idea?"
1766
01:29:20,628 --> 01:29:21,996
It's right through here.
1767
01:29:23,631 --> 01:29:24,799
My son came up to me
the other day,
1768
01:29:24,899 --> 01:29:26,901
he said,
"Dad, you're an awfulizer."
1769
01:29:27,001 --> 01:29:28,736
I said, "Honey,
I don't think "awfulizer" is a
word."
1770
01:29:28,836 --> 01:29:30,370
-He says, "Yes, it is."
-Yeah!
1771
01:29:30,470 --> 01:29:31,739
There he is, my son.
1772
01:29:31,839 --> 01:29:33,373
I think he might be on
to something actually.
1773
01:29:33,473 --> 01:29:34,575
I think I am an awfulizer.
1774
01:29:34,675 --> 01:29:35,877
Because truth be told
1775
01:29:35,977 --> 01:29:38,012
I can take any situation
and just...
1776
01:29:38,112 --> 01:29:39,313
make it worse.
1777
01:29:39,412 --> 01:29:41,816
Mr. Bernal. I'm Special Agent
Costa.
1778
01:29:41,916 --> 01:29:44,752
FBI. We're here to take you
into custody.
1779
01:29:46,254 --> 01:29:47,989
Okay. I-- I can't believe this.
1780
01:29:48,089 --> 01:29:50,224
-Can you not do this in front
of my kid?
-Hi, Ezra.
1781
01:29:50,324 --> 01:29:51,525
I'm Jessica.
1782
01:29:51,626 --> 01:29:53,060
We're going to take
a little walk, all right?
1783
01:29:53,160 --> 01:29:55,630
I've travelled all the way
across the country with my son.
1784
01:29:55,730 --> 01:29:57,298
I understand
that you came across the
country.
1785
01:29:59,233 --> 01:30:00,735
Ezzie, it's fine. It's
fine.
1786
01:30:00,835 --> 01:30:03,503
- Let's go get some ice cream.
- -Ezzie.
1787
01:30:03,604 --> 01:30:05,306
Your daddy just needs to talk
to my friend Joe.
1788
01:30:05,405 --> 01:30:07,341
Everything's fine, Ezra, okay?
My--
1789
01:30:07,440 --> 01:30:09,610
Don't touch my kid!
1790
01:30:09,710 --> 01:30:11,679
- Don't touch my son!
- -He doesn't like to be touched!
1791
01:30:11,779 --> 01:30:13,413
- Don't touch him!
- It's okay, Ezzie.
1792
01:30:14,649 --> 01:30:15,816
It's okay. It's okay. Look, I
know.
1793
01:30:15,917 --> 01:30:17,417
I called you myself, and I made
a mistake.
1794
01:30:17,518 --> 01:30:19,654
It's okay, Ezzie.
It's okay. We're all here.
1795
01:30:19,754 --> 01:30:21,522
It's okay. It's okay,
Ezzie.
1796
01:30:21,622 --> 01:30:23,291
-Ma'am, I need you to back off.
-I need you to back off!
1797
01:30:23,391 --> 01:30:24,759
This is my son. Hi!
1798
01:30:24,859 --> 01:30:28,029
Hey, baby. Ezzie. Hey, buddy.
You okay?
1799
01:30:28,129 --> 01:30:30,264
Hi. Hi.
1800
01:30:30,564 --> 01:30:33,734
Ezzie, I missed you.
1801
01:30:34,702 --> 01:30:37,538
Ez? You okay, buddy?
1802
01:30:37,638 --> 01:30:40,107
Did you have a good time?
How was the trip?
1803
01:30:43,344 --> 01:30:46,047
-I talked to a horse.
-What?
1804
01:30:46,147 --> 01:30:47,982
That's amazing.
1805
01:30:48,082 --> 01:30:49,517
I wish I'd been there.
1806
01:31:03,130 --> 01:31:06,499
I'm sorry, ma'am,
but we still need to arrest Mr.
Bernal.
1807
01:31:06,600 --> 01:31:08,602
I'm the one who called you.
I made a mistake.
1808
01:31:08,703 --> 01:31:11,272
As you can see, my son is fine,
so--
1809
01:31:11,372 --> 01:31:13,341
-We don't have a choice, ma'am.
-You do have a choice.
1810
01:31:13,441 --> 01:31:16,510
I am his mother, this is his
father,
this is his grandfather.
1811
01:31:16,978 --> 01:31:20,915
We are a family,
and we are taking him home
together.
1812
01:31:21,015 --> 01:31:23,951
So thank you very much.
There's no need for any of this
anymore.
1813
01:31:24,051 --> 01:31:26,754
- Okay, everybody just
stay calm.
- Hey, man. It's okay.
1814
01:31:26,854 --> 01:31:28,389
- You need to calm down.
- No, I am calm.
1815
01:31:30,224 --> 01:31:31,792
Hey! He's not resisting!
1816
01:31:31,892 --> 01:31:33,928
I'm not resisting.
She's not pressing charges,
right, Jenna?
1817
01:31:34,028 --> 01:31:36,197
- We're calling off the
charges.
- Come on! Stop!
1818
01:31:36,297 --> 01:31:38,032
Dad!
1819
01:31:38,532 --> 01:31:40,868
Get off my dad!
1820
01:31:41,836 --> 01:31:43,503
- Get off!
- I gotta finish.
1821
01:31:43,604 --> 01:31:46,540
Dad, eyes. Dad! Dad! Eyes.
1822
01:31:46,640 --> 01:31:49,276
It's okay. It's okay.
1823
01:31:49,377 --> 01:31:50,277
You got tackled.
1824
01:31:52,246 --> 01:31:53,647
Give me the ball.
1825
01:32:09,430 --> 01:32:11,065
Calm down. It's
okay.
1826
01:32:12,199 --> 01:32:13,067
Okay.
1827
01:32:35,022 --> 01:32:37,291
- Okay. Let's go!
- Coming.
1828
01:32:37,391 --> 01:32:40,394
Come on, come on, come
on.
We're gonna be late! Come on!
1829
01:32:41,395 --> 01:32:43,564
Morning. I know you have to deal
with this house arrest stuff,
1830
01:32:43,664 --> 01:32:45,399
but would you mind
picking him up from school?
1831
01:32:45,499 --> 01:32:46,834
I have an inspection I can't
get out of.
1832
01:32:46,934 --> 01:32:49,336
Yeah. Sure.
I just have to tell my
probation guy.
1833
01:32:49,437 --> 01:32:51,372
Okay. Hey, hey, hey.
1834
01:32:51,472 --> 01:32:53,707
Remember, just don't talk too
fast.
1835
01:32:53,808 --> 01:32:55,776
What you did last night was
brilliant.
1836
01:32:56,043 --> 01:33:00,581
"For Whom The Bell Tolls.
Today, it tolls for me."
1837
01:33:00,681 --> 01:33:02,917
That's gonna be a good
presentation.
1838
01:33:03,717 --> 01:33:05,386
-All right, bye-bye. Break a
leg.
-Come on.
1839
01:33:05,486 --> 01:33:07,154
Let's go before they lock us
out.
1840
01:33:08,756 --> 01:33:10,424
-Want me to carry that?
-Sure.
1841
01:33:10,925 --> 01:33:13,627
You know, when Hemingway was my
age,
1842
01:33:13,727 --> 01:33:17,231
you know what his parents
got him for his birthday?
1843
01:33:17,331 --> 01:33:18,533
No, what?
1844
01:33:18,632 --> 01:33:21,635
His dad got him a shotgun,
1845
01:33:21,735 --> 01:33:24,105
and his mom, a violin.
1846
01:33:25,639 --> 01:33:28,543
-Hemingway played the violin?
-No.
1847
01:33:29,009 --> 01:33:31,278
Fifty years later,
he used that shotgun to--
1848
01:33:33,614 --> 01:33:34,715
Really?
1849
01:33:35,449 --> 01:33:36,551
Look it up.
1850
01:33:36,984 --> 01:33:38,719
Wow. I did not know that.
1851
01:33:38,819 --> 01:33:40,921
Well, guess who's getting
violin lessons.
1852
01:33:43,357 --> 01:33:45,993
Oh, buddy, I'm so happy
you're excited about this
school, huh?
1853
01:33:46,093 --> 01:33:48,095
-Finally got it right.
-Yeah.
1854
01:33:48,195 --> 01:33:49,363
Mom was right.
1855
01:33:50,965 --> 01:33:52,900
Can't you cover that thing with
your sock?
1856
01:33:53,000 --> 01:33:55,136
What?
I don't like the way it feels
on my skin.
1857
01:33:55,236 --> 01:33:57,471
-Texture thing, you know?
-It's blinking.
1858
01:33:57,572 --> 01:33:58,873
-Beep.
-Okay. You know what?
1859
01:33:58,973 --> 01:34:00,274
Are you gonna bring it in?
1860
01:34:01,408 --> 01:34:02,309
Fine.
1861
01:34:05,614 --> 01:34:06,981
You can go now.
1862
01:34:07,081 --> 01:34:07,982
Okay.
1863
01:34:16,190 --> 01:34:17,191
Have a good day.
1864
01:34:47,388 --> 01:34:50,191
Remember, the last time
this guy was here, he got
arrested.
1865
01:34:50,291 --> 01:34:51,759
Oh, wow.
1866
01:34:51,859 --> 01:34:54,061
- Max?
- Jimmy?
1867
01:34:54,161 --> 01:34:56,263
-Hey, man. How you doing?
-Man, you look great.
1868
01:34:56,363 --> 01:34:58,232
Great to have you here. This is
Guillermo.
1869
01:34:58,332 --> 01:35:00,367
-Hi. Nice to meet you.
-Top security guy.
1870
01:35:00,467 --> 01:35:02,703
-How's your son doing?
-Ezzie's great, man, yeah.
1871
01:35:02,803 --> 01:35:05,139
He'd be here, but you know,
I can't take him out of the
state.
1872
01:35:05,239 --> 01:35:08,008
Yeah, right. Guess not.
Yeah, I guess he can't.
1873
01:35:08,108 --> 01:35:11,745
So, I was telling him,
remember the last time Max was
here,
1874
01:35:11,845 --> 01:35:14,715
he was almost on the show,
but he got arrested.
1875
01:35:14,815 --> 01:35:18,052
He, um, rescued his son from
school.
1876
01:35:18,152 --> 01:35:19,654
-Yeah?
-That's how I see it.
1877
01:35:19,753 --> 01:35:20,854
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1878
01:35:20,955 --> 01:35:22,990
But, uh, anyway,
it's great to have you here.
1879
01:35:23,090 --> 01:35:24,659
Sorry about that.
1880
01:35:24,758 --> 01:35:25,926
I forgot to tell you.
1881
01:35:26,360 --> 01:35:29,363
I gotta bring-- I had to bring
my probation officer with me.
1882
01:35:30,798 --> 01:35:33,067
-This is your probation officer?
-Yeah.
1883
01:35:33,702 --> 01:35:35,069
Wow.
1884
01:35:35,169 --> 01:35:36,237
Yeah.
1885
01:35:36,337 --> 01:35:38,172
-He has to stay with you all
the time?
-Yeah.
1886
01:35:38,272 --> 01:35:40,675
- He's very cute.
- Hey, man. What's up?
1887
01:35:40,774 --> 01:35:42,076
I'll be right here, all right?
1888
01:35:42,176 --> 01:35:44,345
At least he's a good-looking
guy.
1889
01:35:44,945 --> 01:35:46,413
- All right, well, break a leg.
- Okay.
1890
01:35:46,514 --> 01:35:49,116
- Glad you're finally here.
- -Safety first.
1891
01:35:49,216 --> 01:35:50,585
-Yeah. Thanks.
-Yeah, that's true.
1892
01:35:50,685 --> 01:35:52,419
-I'll see you out there.
-Okay. See you.
1893
01:35:54,788 --> 01:35:57,726
♪ I remember that shirt youhad ♪
1894
01:35:57,825 --> 01:36:00,761
♪ Bought the same oneSo we would match ♪
1895
01:36:00,861 --> 01:36:03,831
♪ Snuck into your bedroomWindow ♪
1896
01:36:03,931 --> 01:36:06,967
♪ Footprints let us go ♪
1897
01:36:07,067 --> 01:36:10,137
♪ You wear a wig and glasses ♪
1898
01:36:10,237 --> 01:36:13,407
♪ I smoke and hide the ashes ♪
1899
01:36:13,508 --> 01:36:16,010
♪ I'll carry you downfield ♪
1900
01:36:16,110 --> 01:36:19,581
♪ Code only yours to reveal ♪
1901
01:36:19,681 --> 01:36:22,717
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1902
01:36:22,816 --> 01:36:25,853
♪ We'll sing the wordsTo your song ♪
1903
01:36:25,953 --> 01:36:28,956
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1904
01:36:29,056 --> 01:36:32,126
♪ You don't have to rightWhat's wrong ♪
1905
01:36:32,226 --> 01:36:35,296
♪ And in the morningCan't you see ♪
1906
01:36:35,396 --> 01:36:38,265
♪ The sun is coming upFor you ♪
1907
01:36:38,365 --> 01:36:41,135
♪ Your timing's neverToo soon ♪
1908
01:36:41,235 --> 01:36:45,372
♪ Everybody needs a light ♪
1909
01:36:57,117 --> 01:37:00,154
♪ We're dancing in the car ♪
1910
01:37:00,254 --> 01:37:03,591
♪ We're fighting after dark ♪
1911
01:37:03,692 --> 01:37:06,160
♪ But when the sun comes up ♪
1912
01:37:06,260 --> 01:37:09,396
♪ I'm glad to be kids like us ♪
1913
01:37:09,930 --> 01:37:12,866
♪ I hope you one dayYou learn ♪
1914
01:37:12,966 --> 01:37:16,003
♪ I'm here to ease the burn ♪
1915
01:37:16,103 --> 01:37:18,773
♪ Growing up never ends ♪
1916
01:37:18,872 --> 01:37:21,609
♪ But we won't break,We'll bend ♪
1917
01:37:22,176 --> 01:37:25,412
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1918
01:37:25,513 --> 01:37:28,650
♪ We'll sing the wordsTo your song ♪
1919
01:37:28,750 --> 01:37:31,820
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1920
01:37:31,919 --> 01:37:34,988
♪ You don't have to rightWhat's wrong ♪
1921
01:37:35,089 --> 01:37:38,058
♪ And in the morningCan't you see ♪
1922
01:37:38,158 --> 01:37:41,128
♪ The sun is coming upFor you ♪
1923
01:37:41,228 --> 01:37:43,931
♪ Your timing's neverToo soon ♪
1924
01:37:44,031 --> 01:37:47,535
♪ Everybody needs a light ♪
1925
01:37:47,635 --> 01:37:50,404
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1926
01:37:50,504 --> 01:37:53,842
♪ We'll sing the wordsTo your song ♪
1927
01:37:53,941 --> 01:37:56,511
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1928
01:37:56,611 --> 01:38:00,013
♪ You don't have to rightWhat's wrong ♪
1929
01:38:00,114 --> 01:38:03,083
♪ And in the morningCan't you see ♪
1930
01:38:03,183 --> 01:38:06,120
♪ The sun is coming upFor you ♪
1931
01:38:06,220 --> 01:38:08,956
♪ Your timing's neverToo soon ♪
1932
01:38:09,056 --> 01:38:12,493
♪ Everybody needs ♪
1933
01:38:13,595 --> 01:38:16,497
♪ A light ♪
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