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1
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:11,345
* frozen in a time
And space divide *
2
00:00:14,082 --> 00:00:20,188
* but how would
The universe survive? *
3
00:00:21,722 --> 00:00:28,028
* duck dodgers of
The 24th and 1/2 century *
4
00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:36,504
* protecting the powerless
And the weak *
5
00:00:38,739 --> 00:00:44,678
* duck dodgers
Is fighting tyranny *
6
00:00:47,281 --> 00:00:53,387
* in the 24th and 1/2
Century **
7
00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:20,714
- ah, everything is shipshape,
Just the way I like it.
8
00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:22,350
Same good old ship.
9
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,418
Same good old outer space.
10
00:01:24,485 --> 00:01:27,155
Same good old bridge.
11
00:01:27,221 --> 00:01:29,056
- good morning,
Captain dodgers.
12
00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:33,527
- same good old cadet, huh?
13
00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,095
This is strange.
14
00:01:35,163 --> 00:01:37,097
I've never had these
Sorts of feelings
15
00:01:37,165 --> 00:01:38,799
For the cadet before.
16
00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:40,100
Is it wrong?
17
00:01:43,036 --> 00:01:44,838
You're not the cadet.
18
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:46,140
He was a lot shorter, right?
19
00:01:46,207 --> 00:01:47,975
- the old cadet
Was transferred.
20
00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:49,677
I'm his replacement.
21
00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:51,879
- I'll miss
That little chipmunk.
22
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,414
- he was a pig, wasn't he?
23
00:01:53,481 --> 00:01:55,516
- are you sure we're talking
About the same guy?
24
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,218
- I think so.
- let's see.
25
00:01:57,285 --> 00:02:01,155
He had a nose and a mouth.
26
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:03,524
Hmm, and skin.
27
00:02:03,591 --> 00:02:06,427
Yes. I think
He looked like...
28
00:02:06,494 --> 00:02:07,961
This.
29
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:08,996
Pretty good, huh?
30
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:10,931
- hmm.
31
00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,300
Here.
32
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,568
- hey, that's not bad.
33
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,037
But you forgot
Some of the details.
34
00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:18,239
See?
35
00:02:21,242 --> 00:02:22,210
Come on, cadet.
36
00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:24,245
We've got important stuff to do.
37
00:02:24,312 --> 00:02:26,614
- aye, aye, captain.
38
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:29,183
Add two drops
Of sodium phosdax.
39
00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:33,086
Now add 5 drops
Of ammonium sulfax.
40
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:36,290
(5 drops)
41
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:39,260
Ha! All you raw recruits
Fall for that one.
42
00:02:39,327 --> 00:02:40,294
Ha ha ha!
43
00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:42,230
- good joke, sir.
44
00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:54,408
- ha ha ha! Aah!
45
00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:03,417
Ha ha ha!
46
00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:06,954
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
47
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:13,827
(knock on door)
48
00:03:16,264 --> 00:03:17,531
(toilet flushes)
49
00:03:19,967 --> 00:03:21,669
And then,
There was this other time
50
00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:24,137
When I had to face
The klunkins.
51
00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:25,973
I was running
A reconnaissance mission
52
00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:27,140
On the planet klunk
53
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,710
When I became separated
From my party.
54
00:03:29,777 --> 00:03:32,145
I looked to the left...
Klunkins.
55
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,146
I looked to the right...
56
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,214
More klunkins!
57
00:03:34,282 --> 00:03:36,484
So I leaped...
58
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:40,788
In a desperate attempt
To escape my pursuers.
59
00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:43,791
Landed on a ledge
High above the lava
60
00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:46,294
And drew my weapon.
61
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:50,130
Then the hairy horde
Launched their attack!
62
00:03:50,197 --> 00:03:51,399
- grr!
63
00:03:51,465 --> 00:03:53,967
- they were coming at me
From both sides.
64
00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:55,202
- arr!
65
00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:57,170
- what to do? What to do?
66
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,673
So I sprang high
Into the air
67
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:01,575
And eluded
The smelly brutes.
68
00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:04,545
I found myself running
And swinging,
69
00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:08,616
Leaping, kicking,
Skipping, biting.
70
00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:11,319
I became a fighting machine.
71
00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:19,927
(ripping)
72
00:04:21,329 --> 00:04:23,997
But alas,
There were too many.
73
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,299
- oh, dear.
74
00:04:25,366 --> 00:04:29,002
- so, thinking quickly,
I created a diversion.
75
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,739
Look! It's the ice cream truck!
76
00:04:31,805 --> 00:04:33,273
Free ice cream!
77
00:04:33,341 --> 00:04:35,142
- free ice cream!
78
00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:36,577
- then you know what I did?
79
00:04:36,644 --> 00:04:38,178
- yes, I do.
- you do?
80
00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:41,114
- so while the klunkins were
Looking for the ice cream truck,
81
00:04:41,181 --> 00:04:43,150
You dressed up
In women's clothing
82
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:44,885
And snuck away.
83
00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:47,688
They now call that
The "Dodgers maneuver"
84
00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:49,690
In honor of you.
85
00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:52,660
That move is taught to all
The new cadets at the academy.
86
00:04:52,726 --> 00:04:54,928
- yeah, well,
It sounds simple and all,
87
00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:58,265
But most fellas
Don't have the gams for it.
88
00:04:58,332 --> 00:04:59,867
(whistling)
89
00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:02,903
So, what do you say we do
Some of that pressing...
90
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:03,937
Uh, you know...
91
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:06,306
- protectorate business?
- that's it.
92
00:05:06,374 --> 00:05:08,041
- well, we've received
A report
93
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:10,611
That the martians have
Attacked a primitive planet.
94
00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:12,746
- set a course.
- I already have.
95
00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:15,182
- we'll be arriving
In 5 minutes.
96
00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:16,350
- hey, you're good.
97
00:05:16,417 --> 00:05:19,420
- yes, captain.
Very, very good.
98
00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:25,426
- (screaming)
99
00:05:43,977 --> 00:05:45,212
- oh, goody.
100
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:49,617
We'll have this planet
Deforested in record time.
101
00:05:51,318 --> 00:05:52,620
- all right, cadet.
102
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,622
Stick close, and I'll
Show you the ropes.
103
00:05:57,958 --> 00:06:01,061
Don't be afraid,
You're gonna be fine.
104
00:06:01,128 --> 00:06:04,898
- I wonder if I should
Have made less 2 x 4's
105
00:06:04,965 --> 00:06:06,634
And more toothpicks.
106
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:07,668
(crash)
107
00:06:07,735 --> 00:06:08,469
What?!
108
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:10,604
- all right, paul bunyan.
109
00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,640
Cease and desist.
110
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:15,543
- this time, it will take
More than one deluded duck
111
00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:18,311
And his lard-filled
Lackey to stop me.
112
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,548
- perhaps you've haven't
Taken a gander
113
00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:23,283
At my new sidekick.
114
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:24,985
Huh?
115
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:27,655
- what the...
116
00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:31,124
- hey, come on.
117
00:06:31,191 --> 00:06:33,360
Please.
118
00:06:33,427 --> 00:06:36,163
- sweet sister!
119
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,798
- ok, I get the message.
120
00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:40,668
Let's not blow this thing
Out of proportion.
121
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,703
- don't talk to me, martian.
122
00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:46,339
- any chance we can settle
This between the two of us?
123
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,341
- tree murderer!
124
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:49,477
- just to let you know,
125
00:06:49,543 --> 00:06:51,479
I had nothing
To do with this.
126
00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:54,381
- I'll rip you
Limb from limb!
127
00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:56,416
- hey, hey,
Nice pun, cadet.
128
00:06:56,484 --> 00:06:58,085
Way to lighten things up.
129
00:06:58,151 --> 00:07:01,689
Because you know we've got to
Work with this guy every day.
130
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:06,827
- if I had teeth, I'd be
Grimacing piteously now.
131
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:13,701
- well, I hear you've taken
Care of that martian problem.
132
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,268
Good job, dodgers.
133
00:07:15,335 --> 00:07:17,938
- well, that new cadet you
Sent over helped out a bit.
134
00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:19,039
- new cadet?
135
00:07:19,106 --> 00:07:20,774
- yeah. The replacement
For the old cadet?
136
00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:23,176
- dodgers, I don't know
What's going on,
137
00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:25,378
But I didn't decide...
138
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:27,247
- grr! Oops.
139
00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:29,382
- hey, you got to be
A little more careful
140
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:31,284
Where you're tossing bricks.
141
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,754
- ok, but isn't it
Nicer this way?
142
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:34,922
Just the two of us?
143
00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:36,557
Now I have you
All to myself.
144
00:07:36,624 --> 00:07:38,158
No interruptions.
145
00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:41,495
- well, you know,
I kind of like interruptions.
146
00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:44,331
- cadet and captain,
All alone forever.
147
00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:46,667
Together forever, I say.
148
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:48,836
- hey, look!
The ice cream truck!
149
00:07:48,902 --> 00:07:49,837
- huh?
150
00:07:52,439 --> 00:07:54,575
- that one never fails.
151
00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:58,045
I'll just hang out here
152
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,748
And read old magazines
While she cools off.
153
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:05,252
- captain, it's time
To take your temperature.
154
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,253
- (panting)
155
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,855
Somehow, I don't believe
156
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:10,891
She's a licensed
Medical practitioner.
157
00:08:12,526 --> 00:08:14,361
- ready for your back rub?
158
00:08:14,427 --> 00:08:15,796
- yipe!
159
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:21,769
She'll never...
160
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,604
- ready for the valve job?
161
00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:46,493
- hmm.
162
00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:49,196
Never seen this one before.
163
00:08:49,262 --> 00:08:50,964
- hyah!
164
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,132
Dodgers.
165
00:08:56,904 --> 00:08:58,105
And I thought
You'd be different
166
00:08:58,171 --> 00:09:00,240
From the other men
I've stalked.
167
00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:03,944
All my careful attention
Was lavished on you for naught.
168
00:09:04,011 --> 00:09:06,814
Now you'll end up
Like all the others.
169
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:11,885
- I've got to get
Off this ship.
170
00:09:11,952 --> 00:09:14,955
- personally, I think
It's safer in here.
171
00:09:15,022 --> 00:09:16,924
- me, too.
172
00:09:27,034 --> 00:09:28,301
- (mumbling)
173
00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:31,204
- (sniffing)
174
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:34,842
- why, that's the stench
Of pig sweat.
175
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:40,580
You would not believe
What's...Up.
176
00:09:40,648 --> 00:09:41,749
- (screaming)
177
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:43,050
- hurry, captain.
178
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:52,492
(hiss)
179
00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:54,294
- don't do it.
180
00:09:54,361 --> 00:09:58,365
- I...Must!
181
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:01,068
- eh, w-w-w-what is it?
182
00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:03,470
- it's...It's...
183
00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:05,172
Rabbit stew!
184
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:07,474
(slurping and gulping)
185
00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:08,475
- dodgers.
186
00:10:08,541 --> 00:10:09,777
- quick, cadet...
187
00:10:09,843 --> 00:10:12,746
To the emergency
Recreational vehicle!
188
00:10:20,053 --> 00:10:21,922
- wow. W-w-we just made it.
189
00:10:21,989 --> 00:10:23,356
- yeah, but you know?
190
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:26,559
I forgot to grab
Mr. Hoppity out of his hutch.
191
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,395
- (gulp)
192
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,297
I'm sure he'll be ok.
193
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:33,000
- which is a lot more than I
Can say about that psycho babe
194
00:10:33,066 --> 00:10:35,368
Once I sic
The protectorate on her.
195
00:10:35,435 --> 00:10:37,137
- oh, yeah?
196
00:10:37,204 --> 00:10:41,208
We're all going down in flames
Of unrequited passion.
197
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:45,178
- adios, needy gonzalez.
198
00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:51,318
- what?! Aah!
199
00:10:57,090 --> 00:11:00,260
- who would have figured these
Chairs weren't bolted down?
200
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:05,699
- I'm over you, dodgers.
I found someone new.
201
00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,968
You were just a phase
I was going through.
202
00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:10,170
What was I thinking?
203
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:27,287
- increase speed 170%.
204
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,322
Begin strategic
Counter-clock roll.
205
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:31,424
- b-b-beginning
Counter-clock roll.
206
00:11:34,394 --> 00:11:35,796
(alarm blaring)
207
00:11:38,932 --> 00:11:41,368
- maintain present gyrations.
208
00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:45,806
- (grunting)
209
00:11:46,874 --> 00:11:48,475
- full reverse engines!
210
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:49,977
- engines to full reverse!
211
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,916
(brakes screeching)
212
00:11:58,752 --> 00:12:01,288
- how'd we do, cadet?
213
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:04,224
- c-c-captain,
All 330,000 gallons
214
00:12:04,291 --> 00:12:06,393
Were s-s-successfully
Transferred to the forward hull.
215
00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:08,061
- the interstellar
Transport of ketchup
216
00:12:08,128 --> 00:12:10,163
Is more difficult
Than you'd imagine,
217
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:12,900
But that's life
On the condiment run.
218
00:12:32,685 --> 00:12:34,387
Will you get a load
Of that racket?
219
00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,990
Somebody's getting rich
Transporting these
220
00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:39,860
Well-to-do slobs
On these cruise ships,
221
00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:41,461
And it sure ain't us.
222
00:12:41,528 --> 00:12:44,898
You know how to play
Shuffleboard, right?
223
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:45,999
- uh, s-shuffleboard?
224
00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:47,067
- yeah, because
I'm making you
225
00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:49,837
My new cruise director.
226
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,905
- I-I sure hope
This turns out better
227
00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:56,043
Than the time he made me
His t-t-trapeze partner.
228
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:06,987
- look, it's simple.
229
00:13:07,054 --> 00:13:08,856
We have to return
To earth anyway,
230
00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,424
So we're just taking
A few paying saps...
231
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,526
Uh, fun-seekers with us.
232
00:13:13,593 --> 00:13:15,562
- captain dodgers,
W-what makes you think
233
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,530
That wealthy passengers
Would even consider flying
234
00:13:17,597 --> 00:13:20,467
On a c-c-completely
Unknown cruise line?
235
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:21,801
- worry not, little piggy.
236
00:13:21,869 --> 00:13:25,873
I placed an ad
In a trendy magazine.
237
00:13:28,075 --> 00:13:29,442
If there's one thing I know,
238
00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:32,112
It's the way a vapid,
Shallow mind works.
239
00:13:32,179 --> 00:13:33,380
- b-b-but, captain,
240
00:13:33,446 --> 00:13:35,983
T-there's got to be
300 people here.
241
00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:38,285
How are we gonna
T-t-take care of them all?
242
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:39,887
- look, just take their money,
243
00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:43,490
And you can figure out
The rest later.
244
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:45,926
- good work, dodgers,
On that ketchup thing,
245
00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:48,061
And have a good voyage
Back to earth.
246
00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:51,698
- um, do I have a clear shot
All the way?
247
00:13:51,764 --> 00:13:53,100
- our thrombosis weapon ruse
248
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,801
Seems to have worked
On the martians.
249
00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:55,969
You'll have no trouble.
250
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,304
Have a pleasant passage.
251
00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:59,639
- I think it'll be
Quite profitable.
252
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:01,774
- ok, captain dodgers,
Here's the m-m-m...
253
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:02,910
Here's the loot.
254
00:14:02,976 --> 00:14:04,311
We've got a full ship.
255
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:05,778
- what are you doing
With all that money?
256
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,347
- all what money?
257
00:14:07,414 --> 00:14:11,318
- that big pile of money
You're holding in your hands.
258
00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:12,519
- oh, this.
259
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,387
Well, uh,
We're collecting money
260
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,788
For the orphanage, yeah.
261
00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:18,125
Uh, run by the, um...
The, um...
262
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:21,261
Sisters of righteous,
Uh, indignation.
263
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:23,997
- charity work.
Very commendable.
264
00:14:24,064 --> 00:14:25,598
- yes. 'tis.
265
00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:28,068
- say, didn't I see
The cadet out of uniform?
266
00:14:28,135 --> 00:14:31,138
- I'll just keep this
In a safe...Out of uniform?
267
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:34,908
- well, he does look quite good
In that jacket and bow tie.
268
00:14:37,144 --> 00:14:38,878
- listen here, tubs.
We got to have a system,
269
00:14:38,946 --> 00:14:40,380
Or people are gonna
Get suspicious.
270
00:14:40,447 --> 00:14:42,615
It's simple.
When we're on the bridge,
271
00:14:42,682 --> 00:14:44,517
We wear our regular uniforms,
272
00:14:44,584 --> 00:14:47,054
And when we're out here
With the passengers,
273
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:49,122
We're in our
Cruise guy costumes.
274
00:14:49,189 --> 00:14:51,291
- eh, s-s-simple, huh?
275
00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:55,963
Shall we set sail?
276
00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:59,666
- smile, everyone. Smile.
277
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:01,468
- (cheering)
278
00:15:01,534 --> 00:15:05,305
(horn blows)
279
00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:28,261
- and here's your
D-d-double malt raspberry
280
00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:30,197
And watermelon smoothie, sir.
281
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:33,066
- I hope you ladies
Have a lovely voyage
282
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:36,136
And don't forget to send me
Lots of free gum.
283
00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:40,307
Slow down,
Where are you going?
284
00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:44,244
- eh, w-well, I've got
To start making lunch for 350,
285
00:15:44,311 --> 00:15:46,346
And then I promised
To help the andersons
286
00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:48,381
Get their r-r-relationship
Back on track
287
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:50,117
With a l-l-little counseling,
288
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:51,518
And t-t-there's the kennedys
289
00:15:51,584 --> 00:15:53,420
With their ostrich ranch
In r-r-receivership,
290
00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:55,788
And I'm trying to get
The widow partridge
291
00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:57,457
And the widower douglas
Together.
292
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,092
- sounds boring.
293
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:00,693
- (laughter)
294
00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:06,299
- howdy, folks,
I'm captain dodgers.
295
00:16:06,366 --> 00:16:10,737
- hello, we're the wiggums
From sheboygan, wisconsin.
296
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,172
Harry and I are here
297
00:16:12,239 --> 00:16:14,974
So harry can recover
From gallbladder surgery.
298
00:16:15,042 --> 00:16:17,710
Harry, show captain dodgers
Your scar.
299
00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:20,380
- yeah. That's nice.
Good work, you know?
300
00:16:20,447 --> 00:16:22,215
Like, how they cut it
On a bias.
301
00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:25,152
Harry and I own a factory
That makes paste.
302
00:16:25,218 --> 00:16:26,953
- you mean the white stuff
In the jar
303
00:16:27,020 --> 00:16:28,455
That you eat when
You're in kindergarten?
304
00:16:28,521 --> 00:16:30,823
- well, yes, but it's
Actually for gluing...
305
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:32,092
- hey, I got an idea.
306
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,460
Now, I'm just
Spitballing here,
307
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:34,561
So bear with me.
308
00:16:34,627 --> 00:16:38,131
What if you made
Fruit-flavored paste?
309
00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:40,900
The white stuff is good,
But kids need variety.
310
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:43,236
But what to call it? Hmm.
311
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,338
How's about tasty paste?
312
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:47,240
Now available
In sticky strawberry,
313
00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:49,842
Gluey grape,
And adherable orange.
314
00:16:49,909 --> 00:16:53,313
Now, put yourselves
A business plan together, and...
315
00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:55,515
Huh?
316
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:57,317
- d-d-don't forget
To make your announcement.
317
00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,319
- oh, yeah. Thanks.
318
00:16:59,386 --> 00:17:02,489
Ladies and gentlemen,
We at dodgers' cruises
319
00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:05,292
Present the latest
In cruise entertainment.
320
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,827
We're slowing
And in close to mars
321
00:17:07,894 --> 00:17:12,832
So you can view the fiery
Martian vols at twilight.
322
00:17:12,899 --> 00:17:15,835
- (cheering)
323
00:17:15,902 --> 00:17:19,106
- and we got lots of other
Exciting stuff planned, too.
324
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:20,540
(alarm blaring)
325
00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:24,177
- captain dodgers,
The em-em-emergency alarm.
326
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:26,246
- that was a nice touch, cadet.
327
00:17:26,313 --> 00:17:27,780
- b-b-but I didn't set it off.
328
00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:30,683
- hey, what's with
The outfit, blackstone?
329
00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:33,720
- I'm putting on
A magic show on b-b-b-"B" deck.
330
00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:35,155
- ah, magic.
331
00:17:35,222 --> 00:17:37,390
Did you say you didn't
Set off the alarm?!
332
00:17:37,457 --> 00:17:38,725
Got to get to the bridge!
333
00:17:38,791 --> 00:17:39,726
Got to get to the bridge!
334
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:41,394
Got to get to the bridge!
335
00:17:44,464 --> 00:17:46,266
Got to get to the bridge,
Got to get to the bridge!
336
00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:49,569
- dodgers, earth is under
Attack from the martians.
337
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:51,904
- uh, you think we could
Have this conversation,
338
00:17:51,971 --> 00:17:53,206
Like, next week?
339
00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:57,277
- you don't understand.
It's all-out war!
340
00:17:57,344 --> 00:17:59,346
What kind of uniform is that?
341
00:18:02,048 --> 00:18:04,817
- when the martians
Determined our thrombosis ray
342
00:18:04,884 --> 00:18:06,186
Was just a clever ruse,
343
00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:08,054
They launched
An all-out attack.
344
00:18:08,121 --> 00:18:09,289
Star johnson is leading
345
00:18:09,356 --> 00:18:12,225
The entire armada
To defend earth.
346
00:18:17,830 --> 00:18:22,535
- oh. We need backup,
Or earth is lost.
347
00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:26,306
- so it's all up to you.
348
00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:31,110
Do something, anything,
Or earth is doomed.
349
00:18:31,178 --> 00:18:33,146
- it's nice to be needed.
350
00:18:35,047 --> 00:18:37,884
Don't you think
You're overreacting?
351
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:38,951
- no.
352
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:40,753
- just a little bit?
353
00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:43,223
Aah!
354
00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:44,924
- stay on them, centurion.
355
00:18:44,991 --> 00:18:46,559
- yes, commander.
356
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:49,629
- now's the time to put your
Protectorate training to work.
357
00:18:49,696 --> 00:18:52,165
- I'll t-t-try
And remember my classes
358
00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:55,101
In fake cruises
During martian attacks.
359
00:18:55,168 --> 00:18:57,237
- just keep the passengers calm.
360
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,275
- please, everyone.
Remain calm.
361
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:03,710
R-r-remain calm.
362
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:05,345
- (cheering)
363
00:19:05,412 --> 00:19:07,347
- wow, a simulated
Martian attack.
364
00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:08,815
This is cool.
365
00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:12,619
- the b-b-buffet is now open
In dining room "C."
366
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:16,356
- time for evasive maneuvers.
367
00:19:16,423 --> 00:19:18,191
Attention, passengers.
368
00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:20,927
Please enjoy
Our simulated evasion
369
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,296
Of a simulated martian attack.
370
00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:27,734
- whoa!
371
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:29,669
- what is he doing?
372
00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:34,307
Centurion, analyze
Dodgers' movements
373
00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:36,209
For any semblance of a plan.
374
00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:37,677
- beginning analysis.
375
00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:40,813
- want to follow me
Into a power dive, martian?
376
00:19:42,582 --> 00:19:43,516
- aah!
377
00:19:44,817 --> 00:19:47,520
- dodgers,
Things are not good here.
378
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:50,490
- you know, you really
Do have the worst timing.
379
00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:51,758
- it's all up to...
380
00:19:51,824 --> 00:19:53,693
- hold that thought.
381
00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:02,235
- aah!
382
00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:04,404
- c-c-conga line, everybody.
383
00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:11,444
- ok, big guy.
Blather away.
384
00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:13,446
- earth's armada
Has been defeated.
385
00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:17,016
Star johnson is negotiating
Terms of surrender.
386
00:20:17,083 --> 00:20:18,285
- tell him to stall.
387
00:20:18,351 --> 00:20:19,986
I've got a plan.
388
00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:30,597
- aah!
389
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:37,069
- centurion, has your analysis
Revealed dodgers' plan?
390
00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:40,707
- we've determined he's headed
For the imperial city.
391
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,710
- the city is so fortified
392
00:20:43,776 --> 00:20:45,378
That a single
Protectorate vessel
393
00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:47,514
Would have no impact.
394
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:49,649
- we're picking up
A strange pulse signature.
395
00:20:49,716 --> 00:20:51,684
I've determined
It's either a conga line
396
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,953
Or the thrombosis ray
Is aboard their ship.
397
00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:57,290
- oh, no, and I told
Everyone the thrombosis ray
398
00:20:57,357 --> 00:20:59,258
Was only a clever ruse.
399
00:20:59,326 --> 00:21:00,793
We must call off
The attack on earth
400
00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:03,596
And make peace
Before it's too late!
401
00:21:03,663 --> 00:21:06,366
- hey, maybe it's just
A conga line.
402
00:21:06,433 --> 00:21:07,767
- yeah, right.
403
00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:15,575
- dodgers, whatever your
Plan was, it worked.
404
00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:18,678
The martians have fled.
405
00:21:18,745 --> 00:21:20,513
- it worked?
406
00:21:24,584 --> 00:21:27,253
- so the andersons
Are m-m-more in love than ever,
407
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,121
T-t-the ostrich farm
Has been saved,
408
00:21:29,188 --> 00:21:32,425
And I see a j-j-june wedding
For the partridge-douglases.
409
00:21:32,492 --> 00:21:34,527
Oh, and we somehow
M-m-managed to save earth.
410
00:21:34,594 --> 00:21:36,996
- and I get to keep
All the money.
411
00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:38,998
- welcome home, hero.
412
00:21:39,065 --> 00:21:40,600
Congratulations, captain.
413
00:21:40,667 --> 00:21:42,569
I couldn't be
More proud of you.
414
00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:44,371
- aw, shucks.
It was nothing.
415
00:21:44,437 --> 00:21:45,905
- and I made
Special arrangements
416
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,475
So you could make
Your donation in public.
417
00:21:48,541 --> 00:21:50,510
- yeah, my don...Donation?
418
00:21:50,577 --> 00:21:52,078
- it took some doing,
419
00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:55,314
But I tracked down the sisters
Of righteous indignation
420
00:21:55,382 --> 00:21:58,351
And brought them in
From sheboygan.
421
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:04,156
- go, quickly.
422
00:22:04,223 --> 00:22:05,392
- that was swell
Of you, dodgers.
423
00:22:05,458 --> 00:22:06,726
- really?
424
00:22:06,793 --> 00:22:08,260
- and it couldn't
Come at a better time
425
00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:09,596
For the sisters
And their orphanage.
426
00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:10,730
- yeah?
427
00:22:10,797 --> 00:22:12,432
- now they'll be able
To take advantage
428
00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:15,267
Of a once-in-a-lifetime
Investment opportunity...
429
00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,269
Fruit-flavored school paste!
430
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:18,571
They'll make a fortune!
431
00:22:18,638 --> 00:22:19,806
Who would have thunk it?
432
00:22:19,872 --> 00:22:22,742
- yeah, who would
Have thunk it?
30245
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