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1
00:00:05,806 --> 00:00:09,743
* frozen
In a time and space *
2
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:12,046
* divide
3
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:15,816
* but how
4
00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:17,885
* would the universe
5
00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:20,454
* survive?
6
00:00:22,056 --> 00:00:28,062
* duck dodgers of the 24th
And 1/2 century *
7
00:00:31,732 --> 00:00:34,668
* protecting the powerless
8
00:00:34,735 --> 00:00:36,537
* and the weak
9
00:00:38,606 --> 00:00:42,743
* duck dodgers,
He's fighting *
10
00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:44,645
* tyranny
11
00:00:47,014 --> 00:00:49,083
* in the 24th
12
00:00:49,150 --> 00:00:57,725
* and 1/2 century
13
00:01:21,349 --> 00:01:23,617
Aah!
14
00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:37,665
Uh-oh.
15
00:01:37,731 --> 00:01:38,799
Dead end.
16
00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:40,534
Not good.
17
00:01:47,475 --> 00:01:50,544
Hey there, sweet stuff.
18
00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:54,915
Prepare to meet
Thy doom, duck dodgers.
19
00:01:54,982 --> 00:01:56,884
[grunting]
20
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,253
Pretty fancy moves
There, baby,
21
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,889
But you completely missed me.
22
00:02:03,991 --> 00:02:06,960
Ok, you mostly missed me.
23
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:10,164
Even as a robot,
He's annoying.
24
00:02:10,231 --> 00:02:13,267
Oh, that was just peachy,
My queen.
25
00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,903
A simply ducky decapitation.
26
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:18,172
If only it were
The real thing.
27
00:02:18,239 --> 00:02:21,309
Careful with the cabeza.
I have a soft palate.
28
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:23,043
Glad to oblige.
29
00:02:23,110 --> 00:02:24,812
Whoa!
30
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:27,348
Ouch! Ooh! Ouch! Oh!
31
00:02:27,415 --> 00:02:29,283
Begging your pardon,
My queen,
32
00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:31,385
But I thought
You were over him.
33
00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:33,687
Let me tell you a story,
Commander--
34
00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:36,290
A story of betrayal
And lies
35
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,626
And a woman's heart
Torn asunder.
36
00:02:38,692 --> 00:02:42,129
Let me tell you of
A consort's throne
Left vacant,
37
00:02:42,196 --> 00:02:44,565
A bridal chamber
Left barren,
38
00:02:44,632 --> 00:02:50,638
And a reception hall
Left filled with
Them big shrimp.
39
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,806
I feel your pain.
40
00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:56,777
But now I will have my
Richly deserved revenge.
41
00:02:56,844 --> 00:03:01,782
I, myself, will
Humiliate duck dodgers
As he humiliated me.
42
00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:03,717
And when the wretch
Begs for mercy,
43
00:03:03,784 --> 00:03:07,321
He shall receive naught
But the heel of my foot
44
00:03:07,388 --> 00:03:11,191
And my laugh
Of bitter contempt.
45
00:03:12,092 --> 00:03:14,061
Voice: ha ha ha!
46
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:17,598
Happy cat say
Time to wake up!
47
00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:19,333
Ha ha ha!
48
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,235
You think happy cat
Kidding?
49
00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:23,103
Ha ha ha!
50
00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:26,907
Wakey wakey,
Snoozy duck!
51
00:03:26,974 --> 00:03:28,576
Ha ha ha!
52
00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:32,946
That cadet buys
The worst christmas presents.
53
00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:34,448
Yo, cadet,
54
00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:35,849
How about working me up
One of them famous
55
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:40,153
Deep-dish pot-sticker
And kielbasa pizzas?
56
00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:44,292
Wow. Cadet's quarters
Are a total pig sty.
57
00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,394
He's usually
Such a neat freak,
58
00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:49,229
For a guy who's
Actually a pig.
59
00:03:49,297 --> 00:03:52,566
Wakey wake, snoozy pig.
Gotcha!
60
00:03:55,436 --> 00:03:57,438
Greetings, duck dodgers.
61
00:03:57,505 --> 00:04:00,341
Aah! What are you doing
In the cadet's bed?
62
00:04:00,408 --> 00:04:02,943
This is a holographic
Projection, you idiot.
63
00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:05,479
I--I knew that.
64
00:04:05,546 --> 00:04:08,215
Your precious cadet
Is my prisoner,
65
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:10,518
And if you would ever
Like to see him again,
66
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:15,556
You will meet me
On the frozen plains
Of fridgdonia 7.
67
00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:25,366
Aren't you even gonna
Try and rescue him?
68
00:04:25,433 --> 00:04:28,836
Actually, I've been thinking
Of getting an intern.
69
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:31,805
Mull it over, hero boy.
70
00:04:31,872 --> 00:04:36,710
Well, the cadet does
Make a mean pot-sticker
And kielbasa pizza.
71
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:57,431
Wonder how long I'll stay fresh
In this glass.
72
00:05:01,068 --> 00:05:03,704
Yep, it's a frozen duck
And a frozen chicken
73
00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:06,106
Off to save a frozen pig,
74
00:05:06,173 --> 00:05:08,376
All of which can be found
In the frozen food aisle
75
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:11,912
Of your favorite supermarket.
76
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:14,682
He seems to be trying
To communicate.
77
00:05:14,748 --> 00:05:17,184
Oh, it's charades.
I love charades.
78
00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:20,087
Let's see. Waving.
Waving like crazy.
79
00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:22,055
Good-bye. Magic fingers.
80
00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:23,424
Good-bye, mr. Chips.
81
00:05:23,491 --> 00:05:26,394
Piano playing. Victor borge.
Victor mature.
82
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:28,862
Cheers! Taxi! Marilu henner!
83
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:30,598
No. Sounds like...
84
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:34,935
Point. Moint. Roint. Soint.
Coint. Doint. Loint.
85
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:37,938
Sounds like pointing.
Bointing. Mointing. Rointing.
86
00:05:38,005 --> 00:05:41,409
Sointing. Cointing.
Ointing. Dointing.
87
00:05:41,475 --> 00:05:43,276
Breath! Driving miss daisy!
88
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:44,745
No.
89
00:05:44,812 --> 00:05:47,948
L-o-o-k out.
90
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:51,184
Hey, you're not supposed to
Spell stuff out in charades.
91
00:05:51,251 --> 00:05:52,753
Sort of takes the fun
Out of it.
92
00:05:52,820 --> 00:05:55,188
[squawks]
93
00:05:55,255 --> 00:05:56,624
Aah!
94
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:05,032
What brings you here,
Dodgers?
95
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:09,570
Well, besides making
Some of the prettiest
Snow angels you've ever seen,
96
00:06:09,637 --> 00:06:12,072
I've come to collect my pig.
97
00:06:12,139 --> 00:06:13,974
Is that all, dodgers?
98
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:17,244
You're not here
To beg my forgiveness
For dashing my heart
99
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:20,481
And spurning the throne
Of mars?
100
00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:22,483
Who dashed where
Against what, now?
101
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:26,119
Let's just
Get this over with,
Once and for all.
102
00:06:29,289 --> 00:06:31,525
That's ok by me.
103
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,932
Do you know how to use
That thing?
104
00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:42,169
I haven't had any complaints
From the ladies.
105
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,037
The ladies?
106
00:06:53,981 --> 00:06:56,083
Of course, not quite
Bigger than life,
107
00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:57,851
But you get the concept.
108
00:06:57,918 --> 00:07:00,754
Always the modest one,
Dodgers.
109
00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:02,456
Aah!
110
00:07:12,299 --> 00:07:14,201
Hi-yeeah!
111
00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:18,839
Say, you're cutting it
Kind of close there.
112
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:21,241
Are you upset
About something?
113
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:23,143
Me? Of course not.
114
00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,012
You just left me
At the altar.
115
00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:27,915
Good. I hate it
When these things
Get personal.
116
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:32,052
We're just two sworn enemies
With no emotional attachments.
117
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:35,255
Consenting adults
In a duel to the death.
118
00:07:35,322 --> 00:07:36,957
Exactly.
119
00:07:39,226 --> 00:07:40,761
Where's she going?
120
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:43,864
Bigger than life,
My foot!
121
00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:48,268
No! My beautiful
Ice sculpture!
122
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:51,204
I'll chop that ego
Down a bit.
123
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:56,443
I'm too young
To be crushed
124
00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:58,679
By a giant likeness
Of my...Self.
125
00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:01,749
Wow, that felt great.
What a release.
126
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:06,219
Just call me
The post-nasal drip.
127
00:08:06,286 --> 00:08:08,488
Catch, sweetums.
128
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:14,094
Uh!
129
00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:17,497
[grunting]
130
00:08:18,766 --> 00:08:21,769
You'll suffer for that, dodgers.
131
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:24,905
She makes better
Snow angels than I do.
132
00:08:32,913 --> 00:08:34,648
Now I'll just set
The old evaporator
133
00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:37,718
To automatically zap me
And the cadet back to the ship.
134
00:08:37,785 --> 00:08:39,687
According to my calculations,
135
00:08:39,753 --> 00:08:41,555
3 minutes should buy me
Plenty of time.
136
00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:44,558
If it works for
A frozen burrito,
It should work for me.
137
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:56,069
Where is the cadet?
138
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:58,405
I'd better recheck
My calculations.
139
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,073
I never was very good
At math.
140
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:03,376
Let's see. 7,000x equals y,
Divided by the speed of light.
141
00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:06,614
Cross width 9 times cosine
Of newton's laws of fudge.
142
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:09,282
Say, what was newton's law
Of fudge?
143
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,685
[snoring]
144
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,024
[crash]
145
00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:18,158
Who goes there?
146
00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:19,760
[chuckles]
147
00:09:19,827 --> 00:09:22,295
You dare disturb my slumber?
148
00:09:22,362 --> 00:09:25,899
Go back to sleep.
This is only
A nightmare.
149
00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:28,568
You'll forget every bit
Of it when you wake up.
150
00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:29,837
On the contrary.
151
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,572
I plan to forget you
Right now.
152
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:34,842
Heh heh. What's that?
153
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,710
Some kind of fancy
Curling iron?
154
00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:41,649
These micro homing missiles
Are locked onto your
Very genetic code.
155
00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:44,451
Ah, a fellow firearms
Enthusiast.
156
00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:47,755
Prepare to meet thy doom,
Duck dodgers.
157
00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:56,496
How resourceful.
158
00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:58,832
He's most magnificent.
159
00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:01,134
I mean, I hate that duck.
160
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:05,706
Stupid mask.
161
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,446
I know dodgers
Is out there, cadet,
162
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:17,685
Plotting his next
Brilliant maneuver
With cat-like cunning.
163
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:20,921
I'm sure he's planning
Something very clever.
164
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:27,060
Giant rock takes queen.
165
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,295
Stand back, cadet.
166
00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:29,797
The blast from this pop gun
167
00:10:29,863 --> 00:10:32,666
Should neutralize your
Magnetic containment field.
168
00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:34,902
Wow. That might
Actually work.
169
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:39,272
I learned all my hard sciences
From reading comic books.
170
00:10:41,208 --> 00:10:42,943
Just like when richie rich
Freed little lotta
171
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,378
From the diabolical clutches
Of hot stuff.
172
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:46,980
Whoa!
173
00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:50,718
Run for it,
Captain dodgers!
174
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:53,854
Don't crowd me, kiddo.
175
00:10:53,921 --> 00:10:55,422
Aah!
176
00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:57,725
I am way frustrated!
177
00:10:57,791 --> 00:10:59,960
She's catching up to us.
178
00:11:00,027 --> 00:11:02,963
3...2...1!
179
00:11:04,932 --> 00:11:06,166
Wow.
180
00:11:06,233 --> 00:11:08,435
That was
A pretty impressive
Calculation.
181
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:12,605
That's nothing.
I even set the timer
On the vcr.
182
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,641
[alarm]
183
00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:16,543
All right, cadet,
Get us out of here.
184
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:18,812
The martians
Are gaining on us.
185
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:26,019
Lock all weapons
On dodgers' ship.
186
00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:27,187
Fire!
187
00:11:30,090 --> 00:11:32,826
We have a hull breach
In decks 6-12,
188
00:11:32,893 --> 00:11:36,029
And we're headed straight
For the n-nebula.
189
00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:37,297
Take us in.
190
00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:38,899
Into the n-nebula?
191
00:11:38,966 --> 00:11:41,368
That'll render our sensors
Inoperative.
192
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:42,770
Take us in.
193
00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:43,804
The fools.
194
00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:45,638
Follow them.
195
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,707
If we follow them,
We'll be flying blind.
196
00:11:47,775 --> 00:11:49,242
Follow them!
197
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:55,282
Sensors at 11%,
And our shields are failing.
198
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:56,817
Hold our present course.
199
00:12:04,825 --> 00:12:07,460
Where are you, dodgers?
200
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:15,335
Where are you?
201
00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:19,006
There!
202
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,007
Fire!
203
00:12:24,444 --> 00:12:26,947
He's helpless.
Nothing can save him now.
204
00:12:27,014 --> 00:12:28,748
Finish him, your highness.
205
00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:35,555
It seems that
The m-martian queen
Is hesitating.
206
00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:37,290
Why would she do that?
207
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:39,092
Isn't it obvious, sir?
208
00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:40,760
She has feelings for you.
209
00:12:40,828 --> 00:12:41,829
She loves you.
210
00:12:41,895 --> 00:12:44,331
Gee, imagine that.
211
00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:45,899
She loves me.
212
00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:49,169
That's just the tactical
Advantage I need.
213
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:51,972
Spin this puppy around
214
00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:54,341
And blast
Her engine thingies.
215
00:13:03,216 --> 00:13:04,918
He's heading
Straight for us.
216
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:18,065
Hooray!
Woo-hoo!
217
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,533
But if you were
Just a little nicer to her,
218
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,035
She may have taken you back.
219
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:24,304
You could've been
King of mars.
220
00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:26,073
King of mars?
221
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:27,507
Dames.
222
00:13:32,012 --> 00:13:33,313
Greetings, your highness.
223
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:36,049
I hope your hunting trip
Went well.
224
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:38,251
My ship
Has been disabled,
225
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:40,820
And duck dodgers
Has gotten away.
226
00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:43,156
I'm so very sorry
To hear that.
227
00:13:43,223 --> 00:13:45,092
I will send a royal shuttle,
228
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,660
But it may take a while
To get to you.
229
00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:50,964
Oh, I have a way
To pass the time.
230
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,435
[screaming]
231
00:13:59,106 --> 00:14:02,142
So he's mechanical.
232
00:14:19,059 --> 00:14:20,994
Good morning,
Captain dodgers.
233
00:14:21,061 --> 00:14:22,862
Here's the morning
Space mail.
234
00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:24,697
Hmm, let's see.
235
00:14:24,764 --> 00:14:27,067
Summons, summons,
236
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:28,235
Restraining order.
237
00:14:28,301 --> 00:14:31,438
Gee, I really
Should call her.
238
00:14:31,504 --> 00:14:32,805
Can you believe this?
239
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,242
I got another stupid
Notice demanding me
240
00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:37,710
To show up for
Protectorate training.
241
00:14:37,777 --> 00:14:39,312
Rubbish.
242
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,517
Aah!
243
00:14:45,953 --> 00:14:49,456
This training
Is manda-manda--
It's required.
244
00:14:49,522 --> 00:14:52,592
All protectorate
Personnel must keep up
Their credentials
245
00:14:52,659 --> 00:14:54,962
By passing
The annual protectorate
Training tests.
246
00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:57,931
See? I passed mine
Earlier this year.
247
00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:00,200
I don't need no school.
248
00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:02,435
I learned everything I know
From the streets.
249
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:05,973
Better get moving,
Or you're gonna be late.
250
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:16,916
Attention!
251
00:15:16,984 --> 00:15:20,353
Master sergeant
Emily dickinson jones!
252
00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:21,888
Um, excuse me,
253
00:15:21,955 --> 00:15:23,957
Did you say your name
Was emily?
254
00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:25,758
Yes, I did, soldier.
255
00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:27,627
Do you have a problem
With that?
256
00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:30,230
It's just that,
You know,
257
00:15:30,297 --> 00:15:32,932
Emily is a lady's name.
258
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,568
Ha ha ha ha!
259
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:37,837
Here in the 24th 1/2 century,
260
00:15:37,904 --> 00:15:40,040
We're unencumbered
By gender-based names.
261
00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:44,111
And my mama happens to be
A fan of romantic poetry.
262
00:15:44,177 --> 00:15:47,514
Have I made myself clear?
263
00:15:47,580 --> 00:15:51,118
It seems that
We've reached an
Understanding, emily.
264
00:15:51,184 --> 00:15:53,920
Emily. Ha ha ha!
265
00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:55,522
Emily! Ha ha ha!
266
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:57,190
An authority hater, eh?
267
00:15:57,257 --> 00:15:59,559
Drop and give me 50!
268
00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:00,660
50 what?
269
00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:01,995
Push-ups!
270
00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:05,165
[grunting]
271
00:16:10,237 --> 00:16:11,904
Sarge,
On this first one,
272
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,940
Do you think you
Can give me a spot?
273
00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:16,976
I just live for guys
Like you.
274
00:16:21,548 --> 00:16:24,151
Dodgers, in this test,
You will be piloting
A space fighter
275
00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:25,985
In a completely virtual
Environment.
276
00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:28,055
Ooh, sounds scary.
277
00:16:28,121 --> 00:16:30,123
Don't worry,
Little duck.
278
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:32,059
The computer's been
Programmed to make sure
279
00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:35,128
You feel every bit
Of pain and anguish.
280
00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:38,631
Get ready, pilot.
281
00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:47,574
Sergeant dickinson:
To make things
Interesting,
282
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:50,577
We've recreated
A fighter pilot
From the 20th century
283
00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:52,312
To be your opponent.
284
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:58,751
What?
285
00:16:58,818 --> 00:17:00,053
Uh-oh.
286
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:03,490
I'm sure they chose someone
Beyond formidable.
287
00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:05,858
Hi-oh!
288
00:17:05,925 --> 00:17:07,794
Tv's ed mcmahon?
289
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,262
You are correct, sir.
290
00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,064
For a minute,
You had me worried.
291
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:13,866
I'm fully qualified
To be your challenger.
292
00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:17,437
I was a marine corps
Fighter pilot back
In the 20th century.
293
00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:20,039
Wow. You learn
Something new every day.
294
00:17:20,107 --> 00:17:21,908
Shall we have at it then?
295
00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:23,576
It will be
A pleasure, sir.
296
00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:26,546
No, sir, the pleasure
Is all mine.
297
00:17:26,613 --> 00:17:28,115
And away we go!
298
00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:30,583
Hey, ed,
You never said that.
What?
299
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:33,253
I'm pretty sure that was
Jackie gleason's line.
300
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:36,856
Really?
How about nanoo, nanoo?
301
00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:38,591
That's mork from ork.
302
00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:39,692
Ah, dang.
303
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:42,262
My computer programming
Must be acting up.
304
00:17:42,329 --> 00:17:43,730
Where's the beef?
305
00:17:43,796 --> 00:17:45,298
Clara peller.
Who?
306
00:17:45,365 --> 00:17:46,899
That old hamburger lady.
307
00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:48,301
Look, are we gonna fight
Or what?
308
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:52,038
A thousand pardons,
Oh, wise and exalted duck.
309
00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:53,606
Hey, that's me!
310
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,342
Whatever.
311
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,510
Ed mcmahon. Ha!
312
00:17:57,577 --> 00:18:00,880
I could win this dogfight
With one hand tied behind my--
313
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,715
Whoa!
314
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:07,154
Hi-oh!
315
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:11,358
Aah!
316
00:18:15,362 --> 00:18:17,564
Spinning wildly
Out of control!
317
00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:18,398
Can't pull up!
318
00:18:18,465 --> 00:18:21,268
I--I've lost primary engine!
319
00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:23,002
Explosion imminent!
320
00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:25,872
Can't eject!
Curse you, ed mcmahon!
321
00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:27,374
Oh, for the love of mike!
322
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,876
How long must I suffer?
323
00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:33,746
And to think,
They pay me to do this.
324
00:18:37,150 --> 00:18:40,019
Welcome to your worst
Nightmare, dodgers--
325
00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:42,455
Hand-to-hand combat.
326
00:18:42,522 --> 00:18:45,525
Let me introduce
Your next opponent--
327
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:48,027
Uda frauburger!
328
00:18:48,094 --> 00:18:53,032
Ladies champion wrestler
For the new east german
Wrestling league!
329
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:55,268
Ha ha ha!
330
00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:57,170
But she's a woman.
331
00:18:57,237 --> 00:18:58,938
Or a man with 9 backs.
332
00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:02,041
Remember, you
Have to stay in there
For 3 minutes
333
00:19:02,108 --> 00:19:03,810
To get a passing grade.
334
00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:06,279
All right, frau frauburger,
335
00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:08,281
Prepare to defend yourself,
336
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,883
As I can show you
No mercy.
337
00:19:15,955 --> 00:19:19,426
If you need me,
I'll be in my tent,
Working on my resume.
338
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,093
I'll tally your scores
339
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,330
And deliver my final report
In the morning.
340
00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:28,435
Morning, captain dodgers.
341
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,770
Are you ready
For your final grade?
342
00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:32,372
Sock it to me, sargie.
343
00:19:32,439 --> 00:19:35,775
Duck dodgers, by the authority
Of the galactic protectorate,
344
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:39,579
I regret to inform you
That your final grade is...
345
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,781
A-plus?
346
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,115
But how?
347
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,518
Actually, it was
All too simple.
348
00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:49,956
All I needed was
A well-executed plan.
349
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,858
How do things look
Down here?
350
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:54,361
You got two guards in front
Of the sergeant's quarters.
351
00:19:54,427 --> 00:19:56,963
How are you gonna get inside
And steal the grade book?
352
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:58,731
Don't worry, cadet.
353
00:19:58,798 --> 00:20:01,901
I don't think they'll be
Able to keep their minds
On their work.
354
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:06,473
Eat your heart out,
Sydney bristow.
355
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:09,208
Charlie, you seeing
What I'm seeing?
356
00:20:10,610 --> 00:20:12,979
I'm seeing it, but
I ain't believing it.
357
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:15,114
You two dopes
Are intoxicated
358
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:17,917
With my wild beauty,
Are you not?
359
00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:19,719
No.
No way.
360
00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:23,523
Your swooning craniums
Aren't forgetting
Their duties, are they?
361
00:20:23,590 --> 00:20:25,392
You're a guy duck,
Aren't you?
362
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:26,993
Let's cut to the chase.
363
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:30,297
Hows about I just
Give you two galoots
50 astro bucks
364
00:20:30,363 --> 00:20:31,798
To let me in
The sergeant's quarters?
365
00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:34,667
Ain't no thing
But a chicken wing
On a string.
366
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,736
Baby needs a new pair
Of shoes.
367
00:20:37,937 --> 00:20:38,738
I'm in.
368
00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:42,475
Sergeant stupid
Is sound asleep.
369
00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:45,945
And I believe
I've spotted my quarry.
370
00:20:46,012 --> 00:20:47,547
Deploy countermeasures.
371
00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:50,417
Affirmative.
Deploying countermeasures.
372
00:20:55,154 --> 00:20:57,357
Laser activated
Trip wires, eh?
373
00:20:57,424 --> 00:21:00,360
I'll use my grapple belt.
374
00:21:05,031 --> 00:21:07,033
A flying fish!
375
00:21:13,306 --> 00:21:15,375
Uh!
376
00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:18,978
A bowl this size
Really needs a guest room.
377
00:21:19,045 --> 00:21:23,450
Captain, I'm detecting
Some strange gargling noises.
378
00:21:23,516 --> 00:21:25,552
Those are my lungs.
379
00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:28,020
But my mission's accomplished.
380
00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:29,389
And just like that,
381
00:21:29,456 --> 00:21:32,725
My grade went from
An f-minus to an a-plus.
382
00:21:34,361 --> 00:21:38,398
See, I just thought
I'd--
383
00:21:38,465 --> 00:21:40,433
Steal my grade book!
384
00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:44,036
And falsify official
Protectorate records!
385
00:21:44,103 --> 00:21:45,672
Well, if you put it
That way...
386
00:21:45,738 --> 00:21:49,241
Why, dodgers,
I couldn't be more proud.
387
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:50,843
Whatchu talkin' bout,
Willis?
388
00:21:50,910 --> 00:21:53,880
Why, you're just the kind
Of resourceful, cunning,
389
00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:58,150
And ingenious space captain
The protectorate needs!
390
00:21:58,217 --> 00:22:00,319
Here's your diploma!
391
00:22:03,255 --> 00:22:06,325
Congratulations, captain,
You did it.
392
00:22:06,393 --> 00:22:08,094
You should be very proud
Of yourself.
393
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,596
I hope you learned
Your lesson
394
00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:12,399
About the benefits
Of a proper education.
395
00:22:17,269 --> 00:22:19,972
I told him
I don't need no school.
27481
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