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1
00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:04,505
Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
2
00:00:05,589 --> 00:00:07,674
Hey, guys, guess
what followed me home.
3
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,051
A slime trail?
4
00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:12,429
This cute little fellow right here.
5
00:00:14,556 --> 00:00:15,641
Isn't he sweet?
6
00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:17,851
The cutest little dog
you ever seen, huh?
7
00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:20,437
What you going to do with him?
8
00:00:20,604 --> 00:00:22,523
I thought we'd just
keep him in the bar here,
9
00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:24,358
you know, like a bar mascot.
10
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:27,361
Guys, I kind of thought
I was the bar mascot.
11
00:00:29,947 --> 00:00:31,365
I don't think so, Cliff ie.
12
00:00:32,908 --> 00:00:35,494
Yeah, all right. Come on, Spotty.
13
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:37,079
Bye-bye, Spotty.
14
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:42,960
Oh, how cute!
15
00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:46,380
Hi, little fellow.
16
00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:49,091
Oh! What's his name?
17
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:51,635
Well, this is... this is Spotty.
18
00:00:53,512 --> 00:00:54,555
Isn't he cute?
19
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:57,683
Yeah, well, he's kind of like
the bar mascot.
20
00:00:57,849 --> 00:01:00,686
He and I were about
to take a bath.
21
00:01:00,852 --> 00:01:02,062
Would you like to join us?
22
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:20,140
Mr. Clavin, if you're looking
for a home for the dog there,
23
00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:21,808
I'd be happy to take him.
24
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:26,229
No, Woody. See, Spotty here
is a thoroughbred pup.
25
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:29,066
He needs a lot of attention,
a lot of care, he needs a lot of space.
26
00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:30,609
I'll give you five bucks for him.
27
00:02:30,776 --> 00:02:31,693
Here you go.
28
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:36,531
Hello. Any messages?
29
00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:39,368
Oh, yeah. One of your old
baseball buddies called.
30
00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:40,869
Dutch Kincaid.
31
00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:42,788
I'll be damned.
Wonder what he wants.
32
00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:44,414
Probably another home run.
33
00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:47,918
I think you served him up
something like 27 in his career.
34
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,712
What did that work out for you?
35
00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:51,797
Oh, yeah.
36
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:53,507
One for every time he faced you.
37
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:58,470
- That was a long time ago.
- Yeah.
38
00:02:58,637 --> 00:02:59,596
Poor guy is probably down and out
39
00:02:59,763 --> 00:03:01,264
and wants to borrow
a few bucks from me.
40
00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:02,933
No. He wants you to show up
41
00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,519
for Dutch Kincaid Day
at Yankee Stadium.
42
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,397
They're having a Dutch Kincaid Day
at Yankee Stadium?
43
00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:10,691
They're bringing him back
for one more time at bat
44
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,568
before the game,
and he wants you to pitch to him.
45
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:14,945
Smart guy, that Dutch.
46
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:20,784
He's got to be kidding.
Why the hell should I want to help him?
47
00:03:20,951 --> 00:03:22,619
I'm going to get on a plane
and fly down to New York
48
00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:24,413
just to give him
some free publicity?
49
00:03:24,579 --> 00:03:27,582
What are you worried about?
You afraid he's gonna pop one out
50
00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,835
and you'll have to see
the old Dutch Windmill again?
51
00:03:30,836 --> 00:03:32,504
What is the Dutch Windmill?
52
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:34,089
Every time Dutch hit a homer,
53
00:03:34,256 --> 00:03:36,466
he used to do this little dance
while he ran around the bases.
54
00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,093
It was kind of his trademark.
55
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,345
If memory serves,
it was something like this...
56
00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:43,056
Arms pumping and running
like a windmill,
57
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:44,808
then wiggle his fanny back and forth.
58
00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:46,351
No, no, no.
59
00:03:46,518 --> 00:03:49,229
- It was more like this.
- No, Norm, less jiggle.
60
00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:50,480
I haven't started dancing yet.
61
00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:55,610
Hey, this is fun.
62
00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:58,780
Did you have a trademark, Sam?
63
00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,657
Shut up and leave me alone.
64
00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:02,784
Actually, Sam,
that's more of a motto.
65
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,167
Come on, man.
Don't let him lick your...
66
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:13,211
Don't let him lick
your lips like that.
67
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:14,463
No, it's okay, Norm.
68
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,548
It's an interesting fact
that that dog's mouth
69
00:04:16,715 --> 00:04:19,050
is probably cleaner
than anybody's in this bar.
70
00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:20,510
There's a shock.
71
00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,723
Fras, how about you, you want
to play with the puppy?
72
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:27,142
I don't know.
73
00:04:27,309 --> 00:04:30,479
My mother never allowed me
to have a puppy when I was a boy.
74
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,941
Consequently, she instilled in me
a slight fear of animals.
75
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,361
Well, it's about time
you got over that.
76
00:04:38,904 --> 00:04:39,946
Come on, now, Spotty.
77
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,990
I want you to say hello
to your Uncle Frasier.
78
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,871
Well... hello, Spotty.
79
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:53,376
Norm, I think Spotty
wants to go away now.
80
00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:55,170
No, he feels pretty comfortable
there, doesn't he?
81
00:04:55,337 --> 00:04:58,215
Did I mention to you
that Spotty wants to buy you a beer?
82
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,300
Good boy, Spotty.
83
00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:05,722
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, I'm looking
84
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:08,683
for a yellow-bellied,
runny-nosed has-been.
85
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,521
Can't make one of those.
I'm out of cassis.
86
00:05:17,776 --> 00:05:19,277
Hello, Dutch.
87
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,779
Mayday.
88
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:22,572
What are you doing here?
89
00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:25,242
I hear you're too chicken
to pitch to me, Fluffy.
90
00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:28,912
What's the matter,
afraid I'll make you look bad again?
91
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:30,872
I'm not afraid of anything,
92
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:32,499
and I don't have
anything to prove either.
93
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:35,460
Malone, if word gets out
that you're pitching to me again,
94
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:37,838
might give the guy
the kind of publicity
95
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:39,840
that would put him back
in the public eye,
96
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,050
maybe even in the Hall of Fame.
97
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:44,553
Oh, get out.
98
00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:46,471
I could never get
into the Hall of Fame.
99
00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:48,682
Not you, you pantywaist.
100
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:53,270
It's Dutch Kincaid Day,
not Sam Malone Day.
101
00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:54,604
Man, what an ego.
102
00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:00,610
Find yourself another sucker, will you?
103
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:03,363
Okay. You got a men's room in here?
104
00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:05,991
Oh! What am I asking you for?
105
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:10,328
- It's in the back.
- Yeah, thanks.
106
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:13,456
Oh, I gave my neighbor's kid
107
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:17,335
a Sam Malone baseball card
to stick in the spokes of his bike.
108
00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:21,047
Now when he rides it, it goes,
"Wimp, wimp, wimp, wimp, wimp."
109
00:06:24,009 --> 00:06:26,469
Come on, Sammy, let's go.
Be great to see you pitch again.
110
00:06:26,636 --> 00:06:28,263
No way. I told him no,
and I meant it.
111
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:30,223
Come on, the guy's a jerk.
112
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:33,101
You got to nail him,
knock him down a few pegs.
113
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:34,227
No, no, no.
114
00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:38,690
Oh, no. You're afraid
he's still going to be able hit you.
115
00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:41,735
Oh, you kidding me?
That guy's a washed up old has-been.
116
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,028
I mean, he hasn't played for years.
117
00:06:43,194 --> 00:06:45,989
I could strike him out
with one hand tied behind my back.
118
00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:48,199
Worth a try, Sammy.
The other way never worked.
119
00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:53,747
That was then.
Now I got the edge on him.
120
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,457
I'm young. I'm in good shape.
121
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:56,791
Ow! Shoot.
122
00:06:58,335 --> 00:07:00,211
I got to remember
to warm up before I do that.
123
00:07:04,507 --> 00:07:07,427
Why don't you just go out there
and humiliate him for a change?
124
00:07:07,594 --> 00:07:09,512
Yeah. Yeah. Come on, Sammy.
125
00:07:09,679 --> 00:07:12,140
Listen to yourself, will you?
Have some class.
126
00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:13,308
The guy's an old man.
127
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:15,936
Good for you, Sam.
I'm impressed by your stance.
128
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,729
- It shows real maturity.
- Yeah.
129
00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:19,898
Well, it's gonna take
a lot more than a stupid insult
130
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:22,025
to get me to go
all the way to New York.
131
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,861
I'll see you later... underpants.
132
00:07:25,028 --> 00:07:28,531
That does it!
All right, I'll see you Saturday.
133
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,700
- Yankee Stadium.
- That's the spirit.
134
00:07:30,867 --> 00:07:33,161
Listen, don't worry
about getting into the stadium.
135
00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:35,038
Saturday is Ladies' Day.
136
00:09:01,166 --> 00:09:04,335
That'll teach you to pinch
a lady's butt in a locker room.
137
00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:07,297
- Guys giving you trouble?
- No.
138
00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:10,258
I was teaching them how to pinch
a lady's butt in a locker room.
139
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,136
Ah, look at this. Look.
140
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:17,891
I'm focused. I'm psyched. I'm sober.
141
00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,977
Dutch doesn't stand a chance.
142
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:22,062
Yeah.
143
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:26,816
Only one thing missing, huh?
144
00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:28,651
I know, Sammy.
145
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:30,653
Yeah. I wish Coach were here.
146
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,322
He is.
147
00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:34,824
Attention, ladies and gentlemen...
148
00:09:37,494 --> 00:09:38,661
Call me sentimental,
149
00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,830
but doesn't this bring back
the old days?
150
00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:41,873
Yeah.
151
00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:47,754
I want you to get out there, Sammy,
grind him into a raw, meaty pulp,
152
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:51,299
spread him on home plate,
and slide into his guts!
153
00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:54,302
I got to get a Kleenex.
154
00:09:58,223 --> 00:09:59,182
Hey, Sam Malone.
155
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,392
- Yeah.
- Cap Richards.
156
00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:04,479
I'm Dutch's personal manager.
I cooked up this whole thing.
157
00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:07,732
Glad I got a chance to talk to you.
Here's how it's going to work.
158
00:10:07,899 --> 00:10:09,859
Throw the first two pitches
however you want.
159
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:12,946
The third one, though, just float it
across home plate nice and easy.
160
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:14,781
- What?
- I thought the home run
161
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,825
would be more dramatic
on the third pitch.
162
00:10:16,991 --> 00:10:19,786
If you want it on the first pitch,
like you used to, go ahead.
163
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:24,958
You got to be kidding.
Sam Malone does not take a dive.
164
00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:27,043
I came down here
to strike this guy out,
165
00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:28,128
and that's what I'm going to do.
166
00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:30,088
If he wants to get a hit,
he's gonna have to earn it.
167
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,465
This is not good.
168
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:38,638
You ready, Sammy?
169
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:40,557
Yeah.
170
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,309
I can strike this guy out, can't I?
171
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,769
Of course you can.
172
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:49,315
Listen, this is your chance
to make up for the old days.
173
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,693
It's the last thing anyone's
ever going to remember
174
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:55,655
about Sammy "Mayday" Malone,
that he struck out Dutch Kincaid.
175
00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,491
Now go on out there
and smoke three fast ones
176
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,161
past that lousy,
flat-headed bastard.
177
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:04,164
I got to get another Kleenex.
178
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:15,633
Yeah?
179
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,678
Excuse me. Are you Sam Malone?
180
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:21,431
Yeah. Yeah. What's your name?
181
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,391
- Billy Kincaid.
- How do you do, Billy?
182
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:28,396
You wouldn't be a relation
to Dutch Kincaid, would you?
183
00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:29,689
He's my grandpa.
184
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:31,566
I've heard all his neat stories about
185
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:34,319
how you used to help him
with those long home runs.
186
00:11:34,485 --> 00:11:36,321
I never got to see one, though.
187
00:11:36,487 --> 00:11:38,198
I sure hope I can see one today.
188
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,118
I may have to disappoint you there.
189
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:47,874
This is the last time Grandpa's
ever going to play.
190
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:49,709
It's today or never.
191
00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:53,755
Go away, will you? Go on.
192
00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:59,886
My two brothers and my baby sister
are all watching at home.
193
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:02,222
None of us ever saw him
hit a home run.
194
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,141
Give me a break, will you?
195
00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:11,189
Grandpa told us he wants to hit
a ball so hard It'll go up to heaven
196
00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:14,025
so Grandma can say hello.
197
00:12:20,615 --> 00:12:21,699
Now pitching...
198
00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:23,493
...Sam Malone.
199
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:26,246
Hey, Sammy!
200
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,249
Yeah, all right...
201
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:34,837
- Hey, how did it go?
- Great.
202
00:12:37,048 --> 00:12:38,216
Need me to scalp any tickets?
203
00:12:38,383 --> 00:12:40,134
No. You done enough for today.
Thanks, Vinnie.
204
00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:52,981
Hey, you guys
aren't supposed to be in here.
205
00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:54,816
That's all right.
We're with Sam Malone.
206
00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:57,402
We're his personal trainers.
207
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,282
So you're okay down here?
208
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,952
We know our way
around a dugout, pally.
209
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:08,121
Look out, Cliff ie. incoming.
210
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:14,711
Boy, that ball girl's
really got an arm, huh?
211
00:13:15,837 --> 00:13:16,963
Here you go, toots.
212
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,383
- Aw, Norm.
- What?
213
00:13:21,884 --> 00:13:24,137
The barbecue sauce got
all over the nachos.
214
00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:43,031
Hey, guys, I miss anything?
215
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:46,034
Sammy hasn't started yet.
Where you been?
216
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:47,744
I've been visiting the other team.
217
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,121
Ran into somebody I used
to get hot and sweaty with.
218
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:52,332
- Who's that?
- The other team.
219
00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:57,670
And now, stepping to the plate
to face Sam Malone,
220
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,922
the man we all
turned out today to honor...
221
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:01,716
...Dutch Kincaid.
222
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:14,729
Guys, come on. The first pitch.
223
00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,107
Hey, Sammy, come on.
224
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:19,442
Come on, Sammy.
225
00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:21,694
- Oh, yeah!
- Strike one!
226
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,279
Go, Sammy!
227
00:14:24,072 --> 00:14:25,198
All right, Sammy.
228
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:26,824
Look at him up there.
229
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,243
Doesn't he look
cool on the mound?
230
00:14:29,410 --> 00:14:30,536
I got goose bumps.
231
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:31,704
Alright, here comes the stretch.
232
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:33,831
Ram it down his throat, Sammy!
233
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,375
Come on!
234
00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:36,918
Strike two!
235
00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:38,294
Yeah! Yeah!
236
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:44,425
Bring on the heat, Sammy!
He can't hit what he can't see.
237
00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,054
Apparently he saw that one.
238
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:52,350
Look at that ball go!
It may clear the center field fence.
239
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:54,936
It's going, going... it's out of here!
240
00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:07,740
Poor Sammy.
241
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:10,535
Boy, he must feel lousy, huh?
242
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:13,329
He's really going to need our support.
243
00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:15,164
We'll just have to be
really nice to him.
244
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,667
We could sneak out of here.
245
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,669
I know a shortcut
through the showers.
246
00:15:19,836 --> 00:15:20,920
Better yet.
247
00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,756
Too late. He's seen us.
248
00:15:25,216 --> 00:15:29,011
Okay, I know what you're thinking,
but I can explain it.
249
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:31,264
I know it looked like a home run.
250
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,891
Our first clue was when the ball
actually left the stadium.
251
00:15:36,144 --> 00:15:38,980
Yeah, but it doesn't count
because I did it on purpose.
252
00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:41,315
- Right.
- Oh, sure, Sam.
253
00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:43,484
You let him get a home run
off you on purpose.
254
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:46,362
No. I did it for Kincaid's grandkid.
255
00:15:46,529 --> 00:15:49,240
He wanted to see
his grandfather hit a home run.
256
00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:50,741
Hell, he can explain it.
257
00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:52,785
Billy. Yo! Hey, Billy.
258
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:57,832
Oh, right, Sam.
Whatever you say.
259
00:15:57,999 --> 00:15:59,041
We believe you.
260
00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,209
Why are you using that voice?
261
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,669
That's your
"I don't believe you" voice.
262
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:04,589
No, it's not, Sam.
I do believe you.
263
00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:07,341
Then why are you still talking...
264
00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:09,302
Billy will tell you everything.
265
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:13,055
- Billy! Come on, Billy.
- Sam. Sam. Let's go home.
266
00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:17,643
We get to go on an airplane ride,
and maybe when we're up there
267
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:20,646
we'll get to see
that pitch you served Dutch.
268
00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,774
I'm telling you, I did it on purpose.
269
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:25,651
I swear to God, there was this kid.
270
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:28,613
Hey, come on, Billy!
This isn't funny.
271
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:36,704
78, 79...
272
00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:41,709
You keep moving around, Spotty,
273
00:16:41,876 --> 00:16:43,836
I'm not gonna be able
to get an accurate count.
274
00:16:45,296 --> 00:16:46,839
One, two...
275
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:53,346
Woody, I guess you've given up
on finding his owner.
276
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,182
Why don't you want me
to have this dog?
277
00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,976
It's not that I don't want you
to have the dog.
278
00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:02,522
It's just that I have this thing
about being completely honest
279
00:17:02,688 --> 00:17:04,315
when it comes to lost pets.
280
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,610
Okay, when I was ten years old,
281
00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:10,446
I had this beautiful
Persian cat named Princess.
282
00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:13,449
She only loved me. She didn't like
anybody else in my family.
283
00:17:13,616 --> 00:17:15,576
One day I woke up,
Princess was gone.
284
00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,539
My mom and dad said she got out
through the bedroom window.
285
00:17:20,498 --> 00:17:23,042
The weird thing is,
I could have sworn
286
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,211
that bedroom window
was painted shut.
287
00:17:26,254 --> 00:17:27,838
It's bothered me for years.
288
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:30,800
Then, as you matured,
you came to accept the fact
289
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:34,220
that it was your parents
who in fact got rid of the cat.
290
00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:37,890
What?
291
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:47,858
My Princess?
292
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,487
They took my Princess?
293
00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:58,536
Oh, boy. Me and my big mouth.
294
00:17:58,703 --> 00:17:59,996
Why don't I just
go down to the park
295
00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:02,123
and tell the little kids
about Santa Claus.
296
00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:04,875
What about Santa?
297
00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:15,553
But we do believe you, Sam.
298
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,680
You know, I'm getting
tired of that voice.
299
00:18:18,264 --> 00:18:22,226
I don't care what you guys think.
In my heart I know I did this
300
00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:25,062
for a little boy
and his dead grandmother.
301
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:29,358
Oh, guys, look.
302
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:32,153
Spotty fell asleep on my shoe.
303
00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:34,697
He's so sweet.
304
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:37,116
I just wish I was wearing sandals
305
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,660
so I could feel
his little puppy breath.
306
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,042
Hi, gentlemen,
what can I get you?
307
00:18:46,208 --> 00:18:47,918
Just coffee. We're on duty.
308
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:51,380
What's the matter?
309
00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:55,509
Two weeks ago, our dog ran away.
Cutest little puppy you ever saw.
310
00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:57,053
Just about so big.
311
00:18:58,054 --> 00:18:59,972
Today, Chief made us
give up our search.
312
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:09,857
Woody, I think
they're talking about Spotty.
313
00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:11,525
You want to say something?
314
00:19:11,692 --> 00:19:13,527
No. Make them go away.
315
00:19:16,614 --> 00:19:19,450
Come on, Woody.
It's obvious it's their dog.
316
00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:22,078
Give me a break.
A Dalmatian, the fire department.
317
00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:23,913
It's a different dog, ratfink.
318
00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:27,750
Just cause you lost
your stupid cat.
319
00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:31,921
Remember when he was born?
320
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:34,215
We each took hour-long shifts
321
00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:36,008
feeding him warm milk
through an eyedropper.
322
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,552
Remember how he used
to fall asleep on my shoe?
323
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:41,681
I can still feel his warm
little puppy breath.
324
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:48,813
What is it?
325
00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:53,067
Nothing. Go away.
Isn't there a fire somewhere?
326
00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:56,696
Oh, the heck with it.
327
00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:00,741
I didn't want him anyway.
He's all covered with spots.
328
00:20:00,908 --> 00:20:02,785
Hey!
329
00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:04,995
Take him. I didn't know
he was yours. Honest.
330
00:20:05,162 --> 00:20:08,290
Thanks, kid. Looks like
you took good care of him.
331
00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,960
We had a reward posted. 100 bucks.
332
00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:14,964
I don't care about the money.
I just want what's best for Spotty.
333
00:20:15,131 --> 00:20:17,133
Gee, I'm sorry, kid.
334
00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:22,638
Well, a ride on a real
fire engine might help.
335
00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:25,933
We can't let you do that.
336
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:28,352
I miss him so much.
337
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:31,063
All right, come on,
but don't tell anybody.
338
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,189
Yeah!
339
00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:37,236
- Hey, can I run the siren?
- No. That would be illegal.
340
00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:40,281
Oh, it's just Spotty meant
everything to me.
341
00:20:40,448 --> 00:20:42,700
All right, you can turn on the siren.
342
00:20:42,867 --> 00:20:45,786
- Can I wear your hat?
- It's part of the uniform.
343
00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:47,079
Well, can I drive?
344
00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:48,831
Please? Please? Please?
345
00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:50,708
Take the dog. Take the dog.
346
00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:56,338
We snowed them, dude.
347
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:07,725
Where's little Miss Malone?
In the office?
348
00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:09,643
Haven't you humiliated him enough?
349
00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:12,104
Not as much as he humiliated me.
350
00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:15,608
Hey, Malone,
pull on your panty hose
351
00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:18,611
and get out here.
We got a score to settle.
352
00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,905
Come on, Dutch,
you had your home run.
353
00:21:21,071 --> 00:21:22,573
Why don't we just
leave it at that?
354
00:21:22,740 --> 00:21:24,158
I'm not gonna leave it at that.
355
00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:27,203
You deliberately
threw me a cream puff.
356
00:21:27,369 --> 00:21:28,788
I don't need your charity pitches.
357
00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:31,791
I didn't do it for you.
I did it for your grandkid.
358
00:21:31,957 --> 00:21:33,584
I don't have any grandkid.
359
00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:35,336
What do you mean
you don't have a grandkid?
360
00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:39,757
My personal manager and his kid
are always pulling that scam.
361
00:21:39,924 --> 00:21:41,842
That's how I got
Dutch Kincaid Day.
362
00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:45,471
This was a setup?
363
00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:47,723
I had a chance finally
to strike you out
364
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:50,142
in front of a stadium full of people
and I had to let it go
365
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:51,977
for a stupid, lousy setup?
366
00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:53,979
You never had a chance, Malone.
367
00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:56,190
I can hit anything
you can serve up.
368
00:21:56,357 --> 00:21:57,691
Oh, come on, give me a break.
369
00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,485
My first two pitches
went right by you.
370
00:22:00,069 --> 00:22:02,822
I let them go by for the drama.
371
00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:03,948
Drama?
372
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:06,742
You let them go by
for the drama?
373
00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:09,328
You want drama,
I'll give you drama.
374
00:22:09,495 --> 00:22:11,539
Come with me. You! You!
Come on, right now.
375
00:22:11,705 --> 00:22:14,333
All right. There's still
plenty of daylight out there.
376
00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:15,417
Let's do it!
377
00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:18,712
I'll be back
in about three pitches, fellas.
378
00:22:18,879 --> 00:22:22,258
Two grown men settling a rivalry
by throwing a little white ball
379
00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:24,969
at a wooden stick. How pathetic.
380
00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:28,889
Now, boxing, that's a man's sport.
381
00:22:29,557 --> 00:22:31,559
Punch a guy in the face
and scramble his brains.
382
00:22:31,725 --> 00:22:32,935
That proves something.
383
00:22:33,811 --> 00:22:35,563
Fras, you're coming around, buddy.
384
00:22:36,230 --> 00:22:37,273
Thank you.
385
00:22:40,860 --> 00:22:43,696
Hey, shut up, you guys.
Sammy's pitching.
386
00:22:45,239 --> 00:22:47,992
Oh, my God.
There are two moons in the sky.
387
00:22:48,868 --> 00:22:50,953
All right, lucky hit. Let's go again.
388
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:55,708
Gee, he almost hit a helicopter.
389
00:23:00,671 --> 00:23:03,924
Okay, 226 lucky hits.
390
00:23:06,010 --> 00:23:08,053
Hang in there, Sammy. He's old.
391
00:23:08,220 --> 00:23:09,638
He can't live forever.
27780
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