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SATURNALIA
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(thunderous applause)
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Thank you, Sally, for that piece on caterpillars
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and how they create their cocoons.
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I mean, I wasn't interested before but now I am.
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Our next guest is...
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The world famous artist and author...
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You know him as the creator of the hit comic book series: SATURNALIA.
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Melvin Kolbaba, welcome to our show.
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Thank you so very much for having me, Warren.
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It's a pleasure to be here.
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You know you are a multi-billionaire...
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And you have sold over 250 million copies of this latest series...
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And I don't think people are aware that you are also a burlesque dancer...
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...a very successful one!
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Yes, I gotta admit even as a kid I wanted to do two things:
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and that was to be a cartoonist and an exotic dancer.
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What can I say?
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What is the secret behind your success?
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Sometimes you gotta grab a hold of the strings of life
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and bend them to suit your own reality.
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Good advice.
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Thank you.
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(applause)
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Okay, so this Satur-NAY-lia... or is it NAHLIA?
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Whatever you're in the mood for.
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Alright, Saturnalia...
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She is a cavewoman from outer space.
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Yes, that's correct.
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Now, the viewers want to know... we've gotten letters...
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Will she ever defeat her evil twin sister
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and that dastardly henchman: Igor?
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I'm sorry but you're just going to have to wait and find out.
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We thought we'd find out today...
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Alright, so one last question...
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We have time I think for one more...
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How do the viewers invest in this series?
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I think the easiest way would be to buy the first issue
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and then you get the second issue absolutely free.
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But what if I only have enough money for my pizza?
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I'm sorry?
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My pizza?
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Pepperoni, sausage, anchovies?
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Oh, oh, the pizza!
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Yes, of course! Let me get it for you.
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Here you go: fresh out of the oven... nice and HOT.
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Made with love.
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Are you sure you're not interested in the comic book?
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I'll consider it.
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Oh! Well, thank you!
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Yes!
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(Reber Clark's music starts)
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Well, Nalia: We got one!
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I'm feeling really good about this one.
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Today is going to be a really great day.
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(Saturnalia theme plays)
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30 minutes and it's free? It's been an hour and a freakin' half!
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Wife's in there... she's already passed out on the freakin' couch!
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It was going to be pizza and a movie... but no!
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Movie's already over!
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No pizza. Cold pizza. Look at this crap!
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The pizza is harder than the box that you put it in!!
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(door closes)
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(music continues)
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(explosion)
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(eerie music)
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(rain drops)
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(lightning)
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(electrical noise)
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Theme song: "Who is the one that will save us?"
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"Who is the one that's outrageous?"
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"Does she have a flashing eye?"
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"Is her bra a giant size??"
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"Will her fur bikini terrify the bravest?"
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(Melvin singing) Saturnalia! Saturnalia!
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(Melvin clears his throat)
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(Music rises)
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Speaker: Melvin Kolbaba to Mr. Marx's office.
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Melvin Kolbaba to Mr. Marx's office.
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(Italian music)
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(Melvin whistling)
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Mr. Marx: Look at this.
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You're in the supply closet for 45 minutes! What are you doing in there?
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To be fair, sir, that was my lunch break.
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Ah tatatatata!
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Son, did you happen to fall on your head recently?
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This?
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This isn't right.
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This is digusting.
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It's weird.
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I assure you, sir, I was only eating my lunch and working on my cartoons.
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Your what?
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My cartoons. I'm a comic book artist... well, an aspiring one anyway...
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I have a few here...
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This is a character I've created.
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Her name's Saturnalia. She's a cavegirl from outer space.
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She fights crime and she has an arch nemesis, Ilsa.
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It's a lot of fun.
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You drew these cartoons?
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Yes sir.
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You drew all these cartoons?
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Yes sir.
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I hope to turn professional one day.
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Mel...
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May I call you Mel?
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Yes sir.
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Look around you.
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You're not being paid to draw cartoons all day.
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Got it?!
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Yes sir. I got it.
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(sad music)
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Oh, crap!
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(thunder clap)
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It's been described as one of the most puzzling cases in modern history...
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Allie Mamoulian.
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Terry Goodman.
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Cinnamon Twist.
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These are just a few of the many young, beautiful fashion models found dead.
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Covered in thick layers of concrete for no apparent reason.
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Police are baffled.
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The public is baffled.
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For the next hour and a half,
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We'll talk to the friends and neighbors of these lost souls..
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Hopefully uncovering the secret of:
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The Medusa Killer.
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Hey!
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What have I told you about personal space?
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Sorry! Jeez, it won't happen again.
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TV: Look, I'm going to be straight up with you, here.
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I've been on the force for the last fifteen years or so...
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This is an unprecedented case that we're dealing with here.
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They had brought me and Detective Sandusky on the case
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about the first several months into the investigation.
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We thought we were close to closing the case about a year in...
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This mechanic at this mechanic shop by the name of Scott over on Pooler Street...
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We were close but his alibi was too concrete: a lot like these victims.
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THERE I AM, MELVIN! THERE I AM!
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TV: I just saw Jackie last week. We went for brunch as per usual.
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I've known Jackie since high school.
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We were both in acting together. She always wanted to be just like me.
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Obviously who wouldn't?
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God, I just...
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Thank you.
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Jackie. If you're up there listening...
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We all miss you down here.
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I can't. This is too much. This is too much.
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Ugh, I hate this commercial!
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(Pirate laughing hysterically)
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Finally! I have found it!
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My booty!
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Awh, heahheaaheaaaa YEAH!
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Captain Hooker's House of Burlesque!
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We've got the gnarliest wenches in the seven seas!
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All we need is you.
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Sign up for our new talent show!
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C'mon down and show us what you got!
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Y'know, I've always secretly wanted to be a burlesque dancer. Why don't you and I...?
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Just a thought.
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(pirate hysterically laughing)
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C'mon down to Captain Hooker's House of Burlesque!
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And have yourself a whale of a time!
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Ahahahaha! Gold doubloons! Hahahaa!
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(mysterious music and rain)
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Why don't you just come off of it already, Sheppard?
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You've been at this for the last 25 hours.
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There has to be a connection here, Phil.
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There's something...
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There's something that he's trying to tell me and I'm not seeing it.
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(thunder clap)
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Look, you haven't got any sleep in the past three days.
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Why don't you take a load off?
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How can I sleep at a time like this?
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When every second that passes by another woman is put in danger...
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and we're not doing a damn thing about it!
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Alright! Alright! Just cool your engines.
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Why don't you just go eat some fruit or something?
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Remember what Chief Flanagan said?
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(thunder rumbles)
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You're right, Phil.
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You're absolutely right.
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I'm not looking at this with a clear head.
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Hell, I've made so many connections...
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I'm on my last roll of yarn.
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So, let's see...
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We have a crazy madman who's also a history buff...
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and he has a possible M.O. in photography that's allowing him
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to get close to the victims to begin with.
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And on top of that, he leaves no witnesses nor any damn prints
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at the scene of the crime!
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DAMMIT!
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At this point, he's mocking us Phil.
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Did I tell you about the letter he sent to the station?
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Get a load of this.
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"Dear cops: You suck."
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"Me: Big Killer. LOL"
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"HAHA HA HA HAHA"
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And then it's just nine paragraphs of the word "Haha" over and over.
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(telephone rings)
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Great. Just what I need!
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What, Martha? I'm very busy here!
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Get this: It's another "Medusa Killer."
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Please hold.
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Do me a favor: Take this from me.
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Yeah, I got this.
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MEDUSA KILLER: Agent Sandusky. Did you get my letter?
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Jesus! He knows about the letter!
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Keep him on the line! Keep him on the line!
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MEDUSA KILLER: I said did you get my letter?
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Yeah, we got your letter Medusa Killer.
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MEDUSA KILLER: Good.
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MEDUSA KILLER: I loved your interviews on the documentary by the way.
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MEDUSA KILLER: I can feel my leather gloves wrapping around the next victim's throat.
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You listen here you son of a bitch...
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You name the time and the place and I'll be there within seconds to book you...
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DO YOU HEAR ME!
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(dial tone)
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Dammit!
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Don't worry, Sheppard. He's bound to slip up sometime.
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We'll get him.
220
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(heroic music)
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BAAM!
222
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Bzzzt!
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Bzzzt!
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(pencil breaks)
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(pencil sharpener sound)
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(pencil breaks again)
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(pencil sharpener sound)
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(fire sfx)
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(triumphant music begins to build)
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Sulphuric vision! That's the key.
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Sulphuric vision is what she has... that's her superpower!
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Why didn't I think of that before?
233
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Yeah, great idea.
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So, how's the pasta?
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Yeah, about that.
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Check, please! To go!
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Yeah, for me to!
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Uh, Melvin...
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Listen, I think...
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I think we should start seeing other people.
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Wh... wh... what?
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I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but...
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I just really think...
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We should break up.
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Our lives are just going in different directions, you know.
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Yours: straight down... and I'm going straight up.
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And, y'know, I've got places to go and people to meet...
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...actually very soon.
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Look, I just cant do with these comic books and these cartoons...
250
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I mean, c'mon are you twelve??
251
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But, Agnes comics are my life. You know this.
252
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Y'know, that's just not me. That's just not my thing.
253
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Well, what is your thing?
254
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I mean...
255
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Clothes!
256
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I can't keep living in this fairy tale that you've drawn out.
257
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This is real life, Melvin. Okay? Not a fantasy playbook world.
258
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I mean, look at that girl you've drawn up.
259
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Really?!
260
00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:48,891
Those tits are totally not real.
261
00:21:50,017 --> 00:21:51,392
(Agnes' phone buzzes)
262
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:55,939
Oh, well my ride is here so...
263
00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:57,460
You got this right?
264
00:21:58,692 --> 00:22:02,570
Sorry, Mel. It just was never going to work out between us.
265
00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:03,571
Bye!
266
00:22:10,746 --> 00:22:11,866
Look at you.
267
00:22:15,042 --> 00:22:16,722
Look at you, Melvin.
268
00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:21,382
You look awful.
269
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:24,827
What is going on?
270
00:22:38,732 --> 00:22:39,191
My...
271
00:22:39,192 --> 00:22:40,551
EeeeeAAAAAhhhhhhh...
272
00:22:41,477 --> 00:22:43,529
I thought you could bring it.
273
00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:46,001
I guess I was wrong.
274
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:53,122
Do you know how many Melvins are out there begging to work here?
275
00:22:53,914 --> 00:22:56,083
Nah. You had your chance.
276
00:22:57,126 --> 00:23:00,045
I want you out of here by the end of the day.
277
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,160
Thank you, sir.
278
00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:06,467
Melvin...
279
00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:08,666
Word of advice.
280
00:23:11,140 --> 00:23:12,820
Get it together, man!
281
00:23:16,937 --> 00:23:17,937
(door opens)
282
00:23:19,481 --> 00:23:21,161
(Melvin SLAMS into wall)
283
00:23:25,529 --> 00:23:27,596
(sad music and thunder rumbles)
284
00:23:47,927 --> 00:23:48,719
Hello?
285
00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:52,640
Hey, Melvin! You're still delivering those pizzas, right?
286
00:23:53,015 --> 00:23:54,015
What?
287
00:23:54,642 --> 00:23:57,308
The thirteen pizzas to the science lab?
288
00:23:59,396 --> 00:24:00,396
Hello?
289
00:24:00,773 --> 00:24:01,773
Melvin?
290
00:24:02,441 --> 00:24:03,641
Are you there?
291
00:24:04,435 --> 00:24:05,435
What's the address?
292
00:24:06,862 --> 00:24:09,762
(Thunder and lightning against intense music)
293
00:24:15,162 --> 00:24:19,166
(Evil and mysterious music)
294
00:24:24,588 --> 00:24:26,268
(Loud machinery sounds)
295
00:24:33,806 --> 00:24:35,556
VOICE: My fellow scientists...
296
00:24:35,557 --> 00:24:37,226
...colleagues...
297
00:24:37,851 --> 00:24:39,531
...ladies and gentlemen.
298
00:24:40,396 --> 00:24:47,069
What you are about to see may indeed by the solution to world hunger.
299
00:24:49,196 --> 00:24:54,326
Unbeliveable as it may sound... I am speaking the truth.
300
00:24:55,703 --> 00:25:01,734
May I present to you: The Hydromatic Replicator 3000.
301
00:25:01,875 --> 00:25:03,794
(Phone rings)
302
00:25:06,755 --> 00:25:08,275
(Phone rings again)
303
00:25:11,552 --> 00:25:12,552
Hello?
304
00:25:12,594 --> 00:25:16,498
MELVIN: Yes, hi! I'm downstairs with your pizza? I'm from Pizza H...
305
00:25:18,517 --> 00:25:22,563
My apologies, Doctor. It appears we were cut off for a moment there...
306
00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:25,231
Would you mind repeating that please?
307
00:25:25,232 --> 00:25:26,232
Of course.
308
00:25:28,235 --> 00:25:35,783
My fellow scientists. What you are about to see may indeed be the solution to world hunger.
309
00:25:35,784 --> 00:25:37,304
(Phone rings again)
310
00:25:41,774 --> 00:25:42,774
Yes?
311
00:25:43,042 --> 00:25:46,002
Uh, yeah, hi. I'm downstairs with your pizza. Two hundred dollars...
312
00:25:46,003 --> 00:25:47,545
Leave it at the door!
313
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:50,257
No, you don't understand there is still something...
314
00:25:53,135 --> 00:25:58,891
My apologies, Doctor. We appear to be having some technical difficulties. Would you mind?
315
00:26:01,477 --> 00:26:02,518
My fellow scientists...
316
00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:04,119
(PHONE RINGS AGAIN!)
317
00:26:05,147 --> 00:26:08,400
The Hydromatic Replicator 3000.
318
00:26:10,394 --> 00:26:15,341
Capable of instantly replicating any object it comes in contact with.
319
00:26:16,033 --> 00:26:19,703
We shall demonstrate on this ordinary apple.
320
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:51,076
Alright, hurry up. I don't actually have all day.
321
00:26:52,569 --> 00:26:56,323
You know what? I forgot my wallet in the lab so I'll be right back.
322
00:26:57,533 --> 00:27:00,066
Hey, wait. I got a question for you.
323
00:27:00,327 --> 00:27:02,579
What do you guys actually do here?
324
00:27:06,875 --> 00:27:07,875
Well...
325
00:27:10,003 --> 00:27:10,974
I could tell you, but... y'know...
326
00:27:15,884 --> 00:27:17,818
(comedic decaptiation sounds)
327
00:27:18,136 --> 00:27:19,736
I'll be right back.
328
00:27:21,014 --> 00:27:24,086
VOICE: Mark and remember, ladies and gentlemen.
329
00:27:24,476 --> 00:27:29,981
In a few moments we shall have twenty-five apples.
330
00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:34,027
Perfectly healthy and ready to be consumed.
331
00:27:34,979 --> 00:27:42,061
Now imagine if you will: one loaf of bread instantly transformed into thousands of loaves.
332
00:27:42,619 --> 00:27:47,416
Starvation will become a thing of the past.
333
00:27:48,125 --> 00:27:51,127
Okay! Sorry about that. How much did you say it was?
334
00:27:51,128 --> 00:27:52,087
Um, I think it was...
335
00:27:52,088 --> 00:27:53,714
Okay, here you go. Get yourself something nice.
336
00:27:54,423 --> 00:27:54,714
Thank you.
337
00:27:57,217 --> 00:27:59,017
Ready when you are, Doctor!
338
00:27:59,845 --> 00:28:02,097
Thank you, Doctor. Glasses on.
339
00:28:02,848 --> 00:28:04,048
(Buzzer sounds)
340
00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:06,363
(intense music rises)
341
00:28:12,900 --> 00:28:14,580
(music continues to rise)
342
00:28:15,319 --> 00:28:16,999
(laser technology sounds)
343
00:28:20,032 --> 00:28:22,032
Initiate testing in three...
344
00:28:22,701 --> 00:28:23,701
...two...
345
00:28:24,202 --> 00:28:25,202
...one...
346
00:28:25,746 --> 00:28:26,705
Fire!
347
00:28:26,706 --> 00:28:28,385
(BBBBBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!)
348
00:28:31,710 --> 00:28:33,390
(Machine slowing down)
349
00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:51,438
Observe, ladies and gentlemen: twenty-five apples.
350
00:28:54,316 --> 00:28:55,650
Doctor...
351
00:28:56,652 --> 00:28:58,570
I don't think it worked.
352
00:28:59,279 --> 00:29:00,279
What?!
353
00:29:03,784 --> 00:29:07,996
We'll have to get back with you, just a moment please.
354
00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,372
Everyone, to the drawing room!
355
00:29:14,586 --> 00:29:16,106
(slow music begins)
356
00:29:36,525 --> 00:29:37,645
(thunder clap)
357
00:29:43,782 --> 00:29:46,182
Let me tell you something, Warren.
358
00:29:46,827 --> 00:29:49,663
I was at the end of my rope.
359
00:29:50,163 --> 00:29:53,208
No job, no girlfriend, no life...
360
00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:57,712
And a machine that could replicate anything - are you kidding me?
361
00:29:57,713 --> 00:30:00,977
Was I going to let this opportunity pass me by? No!
362
00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:09,682
Sometimes you gotta grab a hold of the strings of life and bend them to suit your own reality!
363
00:30:09,683 --> 00:30:13,779
This was going to be my reality and no one was going to stop me!
364
00:30:19,985 --> 00:30:22,052
I thought you could bring it...
365
00:30:22,779 --> 00:30:24,459
I guess I was wrong...
366
00:30:24,823 --> 00:30:30,495
This is real life, Melvin! Okay? Not a fantasy playbook world.
367
00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:32,703
(music rises)
368
00:30:54,895 --> 00:30:55,895
Guys?!
369
00:30:56,772 --> 00:30:57,481
GUYS!!??
370
00:30:57,939 --> 00:30:59,806
(Herrmann-esque chase music)
371
00:31:03,153 --> 00:31:04,833
(building alarm sounds)
372
00:31:21,213 --> 00:31:22,653
Yeah, hi, Doctor?
373
00:31:22,964 --> 00:31:26,164
It's looking like we're going to have to... uh...
374
00:31:28,053 --> 00:31:29,513
...maybe, um...
375
00:31:30,639 --> 00:31:34,893
...postpone the testing until further notice.
376
00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:41,775
We stepped out of the room for just a moment and...
377
00:31:44,027 --> 00:31:47,614
The guy that delivered our pizza kinda took the gun and we don't know where he's at.
378
00:31:49,333 --> 00:31:51,159
What did you say??
379
00:31:52,119 --> 00:31:56,855
The pizza man took the gun and we don't know where he's at and I'm sorry.
380
00:31:56,957 --> 00:32:03,212
You have got to find it before it falls into the wrong hands. Do you understand me?
381
00:32:03,213 --> 00:32:04,213
FIND IT!
382
00:32:05,507 --> 00:32:05,840
Okie.
383
00:32:11,613 --> 00:32:14,141
What are you doing, Melvin?
384
00:32:14,599 --> 00:32:18,060
What the hell do you think you're doing?
385
00:32:18,061 --> 00:32:19,270
You think this is a good idea?
386
00:32:19,271 --> 00:32:22,023
You think this is a brilliant idea?
387
00:32:22,683 --> 00:32:25,776
You never cease to amaze me, Melvin.
388
00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:27,988
What have you done?
389
00:32:29,539 --> 00:32:34,275
Oh, yes, officer. I knew from the get-go that Melvin would be a criminal.
390
00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:37,186
As if his art wasn't a crime enough.
391
00:32:38,498 --> 00:32:41,751
Me, as an upcoming actress/model...
392
00:32:42,210 --> 00:32:45,839
I could sense the character development and changes in Melvin.
393
00:32:46,381 --> 00:32:48,714
A darker side was overcoming him.
394
00:32:49,384 --> 00:32:53,305
It was only going to be sooner or later before he did something like this.
395
00:32:55,056 --> 00:32:59,018
I honestly haven't spoken to him since our breakup, as you know, so...
396
00:32:59,019 --> 00:33:01,619
I'm glad I could get out when I could.
397
00:33:04,191 --> 00:33:07,485
Yes, sir. His name was Melvin Kul-baba.
398
00:33:07,486 --> 00:33:08,486
Kolbaba.
399
00:33:08,945 --> 00:33:10,625
Weird kid if you ask me.
400
00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:14,326
You know, I'd catch him around here drawing those cartoons.
401
00:33:14,334 --> 00:33:17,234
Just wasting his life away on those things.
402
00:33:17,787 --> 00:33:23,099
Honestly, if you ask me, I believe that fella was two cranks left of a rusty pipe.
403
00:33:23,460 --> 00:33:25,140
If you know what I mean.
404
00:33:25,587 --> 00:33:27,254
So, yeah! I let him go.
405
00:33:27,255 --> 00:33:28,756
Yeah, I let him go.
406
00:33:28,757 --> 00:33:32,218
You know what? Lemme get you that address 'cause I've got it right here.
407
00:33:32,219 --> 00:33:35,013
I'm sure he'll be home... I'm certain of it.
408
00:33:40,519 --> 00:33:43,355
(rain and thunder)
409
00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:04,481
(mysterious music)
410
00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:43,179
(gun is switched on)
411
00:34:46,626 --> 00:34:48,306
(music begins to rise)
412
00:34:59,139 --> 00:35:00,819
(BBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!)
413
00:35:05,979 --> 00:35:08,256
(rain outside)
414
00:36:18,385 --> 00:36:20,912
(sounds of a shower)
415
00:36:27,519 --> 00:36:30,297
(heavenly music)
416
00:37:07,058 --> 00:37:11,421
(confused but nervously excited music)
417
00:37:24,951 --> 00:37:26,751
(multiple cameras clicking)
418
00:37:28,204 --> 00:37:29,804
(runway model music)
419
00:37:30,957 --> 00:37:32,637
(Agnes' phone buzzing)
420
00:37:35,712 --> 00:37:37,232
What is it, Melvin?
421
00:37:37,238 --> 00:37:39,841
Yeah, Agnes, I think I'm in trouble can you help me? I...
422
00:37:40,884 --> 00:37:41,924
Wrong number!
423
00:37:44,804 --> 00:37:45,722
Hello?
424
00:37:46,765 --> 00:37:47,424
Hello?
425
00:37:48,224 --> 00:37:49,809
Son of a gun.
426
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:51,268
(door opens)
427
00:38:01,070 --> 00:38:03,614
No, no, no! Don't sit there!
428
00:38:03,615 --> 00:38:05,325
Oh, hello! Yes...
429
00:38:05,825 --> 00:38:08,225
Okay, alright, yeah, you're very strong aren't you?
430
00:38:08,328 --> 00:38:10,328
Yes, alright, let go! Let go.
431
00:38:10,355 --> 00:38:12,288
Yes, hi: lovely to meet you.
432
00:38:12,582 --> 00:38:13,749
Okay, let go...
433
00:38:13,750 --> 00:38:15,190
(fingers cracking)
434
00:38:15,835 --> 00:38:17,275
Okay, look at you!
435
00:38:17,587 --> 00:38:20,381
You are quite the woman, aren't you?
436
00:38:21,841 --> 00:38:23,968
Jesus Christ.
437
00:38:25,261 --> 00:38:27,728
Okay, breathe, Melvin. It's alright.
438
00:38:28,014 --> 00:38:31,854
You just happened to make a cartoon character come to life.
439
00:38:32,685 --> 00:38:37,741
There's a perfectly logical explanation for the people at the factory, alright?
440
00:38:39,442 --> 00:38:40,962
(laser beam sounds)
441
00:38:42,028 --> 00:38:43,548
BBZZZZZZZZZTTTTT!
442
00:38:54,541 --> 00:38:55,541
No!
443
00:38:55,833 --> 00:38:56,833
No!
444
00:38:57,126 --> 00:38:58,126
NO!
445
00:38:58,419 --> 00:39:00,671
Bad cave-girl. Don't even think about it...
446
00:39:00,672 --> 00:39:01,672
No...
447
00:39:01,965 --> 00:39:02,549
BZZZZTTTT!
448
00:39:02,550 --> 00:39:04,229
You stop that right now!
449
00:39:04,342 --> 00:39:07,261
Don't you dare do that laser thing on my pants...
450
00:39:07,262 --> 00:39:09,462
My pants are staying on, understand?
451
00:39:09,764 --> 00:39:11,697
Yes, they are! Yes, they are!
452
00:39:18,189 --> 00:39:20,123
Look! What's that over there?
453
00:39:20,900 --> 00:39:21,900
BZZZZTTTT!
454
00:39:24,821 --> 00:39:25,821
Get back!
455
00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:32,744
This is a laser gun that will zap you into a million pieces... don't make me use it on you.
456
00:39:32,745 --> 00:39:34,425
Because I will. I WILL!
457
00:39:40,545 --> 00:39:42,255
Oh, man.
458
00:39:42,655 --> 00:39:44,840
They are going to be so pissed.
459
00:39:44,841 --> 00:39:49,386
I'm a dead man. I am such a dead man.
460
00:39:49,387 --> 00:39:50,679
My life is over.
461
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,040
This is the end.
462
00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:55,635
I feel the darkness closing in around me. I am so...
463
00:39:56,144 --> 00:39:58,186
(Saturnalia purring)
464
00:39:58,187 --> 00:39:59,187
...dead.
465
00:40:03,276 --> 00:40:06,237
Wow. That's good.
466
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:18,347
(Melvin singing in the other room)
467
00:40:18,708 --> 00:40:22,779
"Oh, sweet mystery of life at last I've found thee!"
468
00:40:26,633 --> 00:40:32,247
"Oh, I know at last the secret of it all!"
469
00:40:41,022 --> 00:40:42,022
No.
470
00:40:42,398 --> 00:40:44,598
No, this is wrong. This is wrong!
471
00:40:45,193 --> 00:40:48,393
Men and pieces of paper should not be doing this.
472
00:40:49,197 --> 00:40:52,269
I'm going to transform you back into a cartoon.
473
00:40:58,456 --> 00:41:03,128
Alright, alright! But we'll at least have to find you something to wear.
474
00:41:04,212 --> 00:41:05,212
Not that.
475
00:41:05,755 --> 00:41:07,555
Let me think of something.
476
00:41:08,508 --> 00:41:09,549
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
477
00:41:09,550 --> 00:41:12,679
Open up! We know you're in there!
478
00:41:16,724 --> 00:41:19,560
Oh... my... God.
479
00:41:26,150 --> 00:41:27,150
Dammit!
480
00:41:28,277 --> 00:41:29,957
We lost another one.
481
00:41:30,655 --> 00:41:31,855
We're too late!
482
00:41:33,241 --> 00:41:37,186
Who could have done this evil thing?!
483
00:42:08,109 --> 00:42:09,789
(electric zapping noise)
484
00:42:19,829 --> 00:42:20,829
Oh my God!
485
00:42:22,373 --> 00:42:24,901
(victim coughing)
486
00:42:25,885 --> 00:42:26,885
It's okay!
487
00:42:27,462 --> 00:42:28,462
Where am I?
488
00:42:28,663 --> 00:42:29,663
It's okay.
489
00:42:30,089 --> 00:42:32,223
My name is Detective Sandusky.
490
00:42:32,550 --> 00:42:35,427
We found you here. You were just covered in concrete.
491
00:42:35,428 --> 00:42:37,961
Ma'am, my name is Detective Sheppard.
492
00:42:38,097 --> 00:42:39,806
Do you remember how you got here?
493
00:42:39,807 --> 00:42:42,727
Do you remember what happened leading up to here?
494
00:42:43,853 --> 00:42:46,855
The man who did this to you... do you remember what he looked like?
495
00:42:46,856 --> 00:42:50,443
Do you remember if he had any facial marks or tattoos?
496
00:42:50,785 --> 00:42:51,785
DO YOU REMEMBER ANYTHING?!
497
00:42:52,278 --> 00:42:54,478
SPEAK TO ME, DUMMY, SPEAK! THINK!
498
00:42:54,906 --> 00:42:55,906
...No!
499
00:42:58,284 --> 00:42:59,564
(car passing by)
500
00:42:59,660 --> 00:43:02,796
MELVIN: We'll just say I made a mistake, alright?
501
00:43:04,791 --> 00:43:08,294
Uh huh. Yes. Okay.
502
00:43:08,795 --> 00:43:11,061
Now I can't see. Alright. Uh huh.
503
00:43:12,507 --> 00:43:13,811
(LOUD RAP MUSIC PLAYING)
504
00:43:14,092 --> 00:43:15,772
Yes, that's the radio.
505
00:43:16,469 --> 00:43:19,069
Why don't you look at those for a bit?
506
00:43:22,141 --> 00:43:25,561
You're in there. Do you recognize yourself?
507
00:43:26,896 --> 00:43:28,256
Yeah! That's you!
508
00:43:34,737 --> 00:43:36,804
There's a whole bunch in there.
509
00:43:40,326 --> 00:43:41,926
(intense Ilsa theme)
510
00:43:51,838 --> 00:43:55,091
Yeah, I know. I know: evil.
511
00:43:56,242 --> 00:44:03,207
Okay, there's a turn up here but I'm not sure if it's left or right.
512
00:44:09,272 --> 00:44:10,272
Thanks.
513
00:44:11,691 --> 00:44:13,400
I need those to drive.
514
00:44:13,401 --> 00:44:14,401
Thank you.
515
00:44:15,152 --> 00:44:17,086
Alright, now let's see here:
516
00:44:17,697 --> 00:44:21,684
If Chapin goes down that way then that means...
517
00:44:23,161 --> 00:44:24,601
Hey... hey... HEY!
518
00:44:26,414 --> 00:44:28,094
No! What are you doing?!
519
00:44:30,209 --> 00:44:31,409
Get back here.
520
00:44:31,586 --> 00:44:33,266
Get back here right now.
521
00:44:33,588 --> 00:44:35,654
Don't make me come over there.
522
00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:36,840
Stop it!
523
00:44:36,891 --> 00:44:37,891
Get over here.
524
00:44:38,176 --> 00:44:39,856
Get over here right now.
525
00:44:39,969 --> 00:44:40,969
Come here!
526
00:44:42,013 --> 00:44:43,763
Get over here right now
527
00:44:43,764 --> 00:44:45,204
Haaawww my Gawwwd!
528
00:44:48,311 --> 00:44:49,895
Don't make me turn you back into a...
529
00:44:49,896 --> 00:44:51,576
BBBZZZZTTTTTTTTTT!!!!
530
00:44:54,442 --> 00:44:55,562
What the hell?
531
00:44:55,635 --> 00:44:56,635
BBZZZZZTTTTTTTTT!!!!
532
00:45:01,782 --> 00:45:03,382
BBZZZZTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
533
00:45:04,327 --> 00:45:05,527
(intense music)
534
00:45:16,714 --> 00:45:18,514
(ethereal operatic soprano)
535
00:45:33,856 --> 00:45:35,296
BBBZZZTTTTTTTT!!!!
536
00:45:40,821 --> 00:45:41,821
Sorry!
537
00:45:46,953 --> 00:45:47,953
Hey!
538
00:45:48,329 --> 00:45:49,369
Need a hand?
539
00:45:50,164 --> 00:45:52,165
Uh, no thanks.
540
00:45:52,166 --> 00:45:53,793
Have one.
541
00:45:54,293 --> 00:45:55,544
Thanks very much.
542
00:45:57,797 --> 00:45:58,797
(car engine)
543
00:46:00,216 --> 00:46:02,384
AGNES VOICEMAIL: Hi, you've reached Agnes.
544
00:46:02,385 --> 00:46:05,304
I can't reach the phone right now but leave your name and number
545
00:46:05,346 --> 00:46:07,347
and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
546
00:46:07,348 --> 00:46:08,468
Thanks, babe.
547
00:46:08,766 --> 00:46:13,145
Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeee.
548
00:46:18,401 --> 00:46:22,817
I'm sorry, my dear. I'm going to take their advice and give you up.
549
00:46:23,072 --> 00:46:26,976
You and your fur bikini have brought me nothing but trouble.
550
00:46:27,201 --> 00:46:33,748
For my sake, from now on, I'll only be drawing wildlife and landscapes.
551
00:46:33,749 --> 00:46:36,127
No more cleavage.
552
00:46:36,344 --> 00:46:37,344
Ever.
553
00:46:37,762 --> 00:46:40,047
That's it. No more cleavage.
554
00:46:40,548 --> 00:46:43,843
I won't even let the thought enter my brain.
555
00:46:46,637 --> 00:46:47,677
Aaoooww Gawd!
556
00:46:49,557 --> 00:46:52,727
Oh, Lord. Please help me.
557
00:46:53,686 --> 00:46:56,438
Show me the way. Give me a sign.
558
00:46:56,439 --> 00:46:59,767
Show me that there is more to life than just boobs.
559
00:47:00,693 --> 00:47:03,387
(Angelic singing)
560
00:47:08,993 --> 00:47:10,202
Thank you.
561
00:47:11,746 --> 00:47:13,106
(coffee bubbling)
562
00:47:22,923 --> 00:47:24,020
She's still in shock.
563
00:47:25,509 --> 00:47:27,845
It's too bad she's not going to be talking to us for a while.
564
00:47:32,008 --> 00:47:33,008
DAMMIT!
565
00:47:33,392 --> 00:47:35,644
And we were so close this time too.
566
00:47:35,803 --> 00:47:39,067
That was our biggest lead yet in catching the guy.
567
00:47:40,775 --> 00:47:42,641
So where do we go from here?
568
00:47:43,527 --> 00:47:45,987
Well, I just got off the phone with the front desk.
569
00:47:45,988 --> 00:47:48,823
The only other person that was signed in on their ledger last night
570
00:47:48,824 --> 00:47:51,558
was a guy by the name of Melvin Kolbaba.
571
00:47:51,911 --> 00:47:54,497
The only thing that they know is that he's a pizza delivery guy.
572
00:47:55,456 --> 00:47:58,256
Pizza delivery guy? How does that help us?
573
00:47:59,168 --> 00:48:00,528
(phone vibrating)
574
00:48:03,389 --> 00:48:04,382
Yeah?
575
00:48:08,302 --> 00:48:10,429
What was stolen?
576
00:48:12,064 --> 00:48:13,664
Top secret facility?
577
00:48:14,517 --> 00:48:16,037
(suspenseful music)
578
00:48:18,771 --> 00:48:21,671
You said he was a pizza delivery guy, right?
579
00:48:21,857 --> 00:48:22,857
Right.
580
00:48:24,068 --> 00:48:26,334
You're not going to believe this.
581
00:48:31,951 --> 00:48:34,520
RADIO: You're listening to 98.8 KBBL.
582
00:48:35,321 --> 00:48:38,265
This is "Miss T" signing off for the evening.
583
00:48:38,499 --> 00:48:41,571
A final word before I disappear into the night:
584
00:48:41,877 --> 00:48:46,423
This is for all those lovely ladies making a living in front of the camera -
585
00:48:46,424 --> 00:48:50,552
Be sure to keep an eye on that bag of cement at your next photoshoot.
586
00:48:50,553 --> 00:48:52,553
It might just save your life.
587
00:48:53,305 --> 00:48:56,505
The Medusa Killer has claimed yet another victim.
588
00:48:57,184 --> 00:49:00,354
Stay vigilant and fabulous girls.
589
00:49:01,313 --> 00:49:05,009
That's all I got. Goodnight and good luck.
590
00:49:11,282 --> 00:49:12,562
(night crickets)
591
00:49:34,305 --> 00:49:35,345
(gun buzzing)
592
00:49:39,727 --> 00:49:44,715
Melvin Kolbaba, come on down: You're a WINNER!
593
00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:46,859
Melvin!
594
00:49:46,860 --> 00:49:50,069
Your fabulous performance as a burlesque dancer!
595
00:49:50,070 --> 00:49:56,018
I have for you this STUNNING trophy in honor of your FABULOUS performance!
596
00:49:56,577 --> 00:49:58,870
AND to top it all off...
597
00:49:58,871 --> 00:50:00,956
You have just won...
598
00:50:01,290 --> 00:50:02,249
YES SIR.
599
00:50:02,250 --> 00:50:07,379
You have just won an all-expense paid trip to...
600
00:50:08,047 --> 00:50:09,173
...wait for it...
601
00:50:09,590 --> 00:50:10,590
SATURN!!!!
602
00:50:12,176 --> 00:50:15,429
Four... three... two... one...
603
00:50:16,722 --> 00:50:18,522
Zero: all engines running.
604
00:50:19,516 --> 00:50:20,796
(rocket ignites)
605
00:50:53,801 --> 00:50:56,662
(Monolithic ethereal voices)
606
00:51:13,237 --> 00:51:15,304
(Happy fur bikini planet music)
607
00:51:24,665 --> 00:51:26,583
Yeah ha ha ha!
608
00:51:27,167 --> 00:51:29,211
This is so cool!
609
00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:34,825
Nalia, I love you.
610
00:51:35,718 --> 00:51:38,184
Don't mind me: I'm just an observer.
611
00:51:41,974 --> 00:51:43,673
Oh, what am I doing? This is my dream!
612
00:51:44,059 --> 00:51:45,059
Come here!
613
00:51:45,603 --> 00:51:48,339
(Saturnalia waltz begins)
614
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:53,552
This is the greatest day of my life!
615
00:51:57,781 --> 00:51:59,581
(evil noise from the water)
616
00:52:08,959 --> 00:52:09,959
No!
617
00:52:10,336 --> 00:52:12,602
I won't look at your Medusa Boobs!
618
00:52:14,465 --> 00:52:16,798
No! You can't make me look at them!
619
00:52:32,816 --> 00:52:33,816
No!
620
00:52:33,984 --> 00:52:34,984
No!
621
00:52:36,904 --> 00:52:37,904
No!
622
00:52:39,448 --> 00:52:42,226
HeyyyeaaaaAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
623
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:52,622
(uneasy music)
624
00:53:24,159 --> 00:53:25,159
Nalia?
625
00:53:27,121 --> 00:53:28,121
Nalia??
626
00:53:35,137 --> 00:53:36,817
Right there: freeze it!
627
00:53:39,133 --> 00:53:41,676
Melvin Kolbaba. Of course.
628
00:53:41,677 --> 00:53:44,929
Pizza delivery guy! It all makes sense now.
629
00:53:44,930 --> 00:53:47,683
He probably murdered all those women when they ordered pizza from him.
630
00:53:47,766 --> 00:53:51,686
And just when we were this close to getting him, he catches wind of this "nerd doohickey"
631
00:53:51,687 --> 00:53:54,480
Now he can just make copies of millions of dollars in cash
632
00:53:54,481 --> 00:53:56,566
and use it to escape the country and probably
633
00:53:56,567 --> 00:53:59,467
run off to some remote beach God knows where!
634
00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:02,364
That way, we'd never catch him.
635
00:54:05,209 --> 00:54:08,604
But little does he know that Sandusky and Sheppard are on the case.
636
00:54:09,171 --> 00:54:11,497
I don't know what god he prays to, Phil...
637
00:54:11,498 --> 00:54:13,375
but, he better be in his good graces.
638
00:54:13,834 --> 00:54:15,001
Let's go.
639
00:54:17,546 --> 00:54:19,413
(Herrmann-esque chase music)
640
00:54:41,487 --> 00:54:42,927
BBZZZZTTTTTTTT!!!!
641
00:54:53,916 --> 00:54:55,596
(intense combat music)
642
00:55:25,113 --> 00:55:26,713
(electrical zapping)
643
00:55:46,051 --> 00:55:48,554
Hey! Wow. Oh my God.
644
00:55:56,728 --> 00:55:57,728
(chewing)
645
00:56:08,448 --> 00:56:09,448
(laughter)
646
00:56:14,496 --> 00:56:16,176
SSCCHHHHWWWINNNNNNGGG!
647
00:56:21,336 --> 00:56:22,856
BBBZZZZTTTTTTTT!!!!
648
00:56:31,221 --> 00:56:32,661
(villainous music)
649
00:56:59,416 --> 00:57:00,416
Sure.
650
00:57:02,044 --> 00:57:03,724
BBBZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTT!!!!
651
00:57:07,516 --> 00:57:08,516
Okay...
652
00:57:08,592 --> 00:57:12,112
We're just going to sneak in and put the machine back.
653
00:57:12,179 --> 00:57:13,859
How hard can that be?
654
00:57:14,556 --> 00:57:15,836
(lasers humming)
655
00:57:18,477 --> 00:57:20,395
Oh my God.
656
00:57:21,188 --> 00:57:23,721
They must have just installed lasers.
657
00:57:24,274 --> 00:57:25,394
What do we do?
658
00:57:30,656 --> 00:57:31,656
Alright.
659
00:57:50,967 --> 00:57:51,967
Be careful!
660
00:58:21,498 --> 00:58:22,698
You were great!
661
00:58:23,291 --> 00:58:25,460
(alarm ringing)
662
00:58:37,472 --> 00:58:38,932
Look at him Sandusky.
663
00:58:39,349 --> 00:58:42,741
Sitting in that chair yawning that dumb yawn of his.
664
00:58:43,395 --> 00:58:45,439
He's got killer written all over him.
665
00:58:45,781 --> 00:58:48,315
Just imagine what they'll do to him over there at the yard.
666
00:58:48,316 --> 00:58:50,776
The boys will eat him up like candy.
667
00:58:50,777 --> 00:58:52,137
Rock hard candy.
668
00:58:54,540 --> 00:58:55,540
Alright, Kolbaba. Listen up.
669
00:58:56,575 --> 00:58:58,367
Why'd you do it? Hmm??
670
00:58:58,368 --> 00:59:00,048
Why'd you do it, Kolbaba?
671
00:59:00,287 --> 00:59:01,967
Twelve beautiful innocent women...
672
00:59:02,205 --> 00:59:05,853
with all their futures and hopes and dreams gone now thanks to you.
673
00:59:10,547 --> 00:59:11,547
What?
674
00:59:11,882 --> 00:59:14,082
Does Miss Goodman ring any bells?
675
00:59:14,634 --> 00:59:16,434
What about Cinnamon Twist?
676
00:59:17,054 --> 00:59:19,513
I'm sorry, what are we talking about?
677
00:59:19,514 --> 00:59:21,683
(laughing) "What are we talking about" he says!
678
00:59:21,775 --> 00:59:23,708
Show him the file, Sandusky.
679
00:59:24,061 --> 00:59:26,396
Oh, you wanna explain this to us, Kolbaba?
680
00:59:26,413 --> 00:59:29,190
Some pretty good doodles if I do say so myself.
681
00:59:29,191 --> 00:59:32,860
Yes, those are mine. I drew them. What about them?
682
00:59:32,861 --> 00:59:34,461
Oh, so you confess?
683
00:59:34,738 --> 00:59:36,030
Confess to what??
684
00:59:36,031 --> 00:59:38,031
That you're The Medusa Killer!
685
00:59:38,116 --> 00:59:39,116
What?!
686
00:59:39,159 --> 00:59:43,205
Medusa Boobs... Medusa Killer...
687
00:59:43,547 --> 00:59:46,625
There's too many similarities here. You can't talk your way out of this.
688
00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:50,003
Well, that's a complete coincidence.
689
00:59:50,462 --> 00:59:52,062
It was just an idea!
690
00:59:52,339 --> 00:59:55,299
Do you know how hard inspiration is to come by?
691
00:59:55,300 --> 00:59:57,500
Okay, so lemme get this straight:
692
00:59:57,803 --> 01:00:01,055
What you're saying is that this cartoon girl that you drew
693
01:00:01,056 --> 01:00:05,894
somehow came to life and can magically animate these petrified statues?
694
01:00:06,311 --> 01:00:08,778
Yes! I drew her and she came to life!
695
01:00:08,872 --> 01:00:12,520
Go talk with her down the hall - you'll see her balloons!
696
01:00:15,112 --> 01:00:18,823
The speech balloons! When she talks there are speech balloons... not the...
697
01:00:18,824 --> 01:00:21,367
Just listen to me: I am telling the truth!
698
01:00:21,368 --> 01:00:25,788
Oh, please. We have witnesses who saw you at that hotel. The same as the killer!
699
01:00:25,789 --> 01:00:30,710
Okay: I freely admit I stole the machine but I never killed anyone!
700
01:00:31,253 --> 01:00:33,337
I think you guys are making a huge mistake!
701
01:00:33,338 --> 01:00:35,138
You got the wrong guy here!
702
01:00:35,340 --> 01:00:36,715
Huge mistake? We got the wrong guy...
703
01:00:36,716 --> 01:00:38,133
I'LL SHOW YOU THE WRONG GUY!
704
01:00:38,134 --> 01:00:39,654
YOU SON OF A BITCH!
705
01:00:41,763 --> 01:00:43,443
Sir, take off your hat.
706
01:00:47,185 --> 01:00:48,305
Turn to your left.
707
01:00:48,645 --> 01:00:50,085
Your OTHER left.
708
01:00:51,648 --> 01:00:52,928
(camera flashes)
709
01:00:53,024 --> 01:00:54,704
Now turn to your right.
710
01:00:55,619 --> 01:01:01,240
AGNES: I knew it was only a matter of time before you ended up in a place like this, Melvin.
711
01:01:01,241 --> 01:01:05,081
But then again who knew that you would be The Medusa Killer?
712
01:01:05,287 --> 01:01:06,996
I am NOT The Medusa Killer!
713
01:01:06,997 --> 01:01:09,897
Well, who's the one behind bars now, Melvin? Huh?
714
01:01:10,083 --> 01:01:14,462
Gosh! I almost let you sleep with me!
715
01:01:14,754 --> 01:01:15,794
Wait... what?
716
01:01:16,256 --> 01:01:19,156
You could have killed me in my own bedroom.
717
01:01:19,426 --> 01:01:21,218
Agnes, you know me... I could never...
718
01:01:21,219 --> 01:01:23,470
Do I know you Melvin? DO I?
719
01:01:23,471 --> 01:01:26,071
Yes, you do. I am completely inncoent.
720
01:01:26,099 --> 01:01:27,224
Tell that to the police.
721
01:01:27,225 --> 01:01:31,771
I have! But, when Nalia here brings those statues back to life...
722
01:01:32,072 --> 01:01:33,072
They'll believe me.
723
01:01:34,357 --> 01:01:38,845
She can bring the statues back to life?
724
01:01:39,288 --> 01:01:40,808
It's a long story.
725
01:01:41,156 --> 01:01:43,616
Well, good luck proving anything in court Melvin
726
01:01:43,617 --> 01:01:46,744
with someone who's half naked wearing a leapord bikini!
727
01:01:46,745 --> 01:01:48,811
Oh, leave her alone, will you?!
728
01:01:53,710 --> 01:01:54,710
I gotta go.
729
01:01:55,587 --> 01:01:58,254
But one selfie for the road won't hurt.
730
01:01:58,757 --> 01:01:59,797
For the gram!
731
01:02:00,217 --> 01:02:01,497
(camera flashes)
732
01:02:02,677 --> 01:02:04,357
(calm nostalgic music)
733
01:02:07,098 --> 01:02:08,698
You feeling alright?
734
01:02:09,267 --> 01:02:10,267
(laughing)
735
01:02:10,610 --> 01:02:12,677
Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good.
736
01:02:13,705 --> 01:02:17,817
Just taking it all in one last time before it comes down tomorrow.
737
01:02:20,487 --> 01:02:21,487
You know...
738
01:02:21,988 --> 01:02:22,988
Actually...
739
01:02:23,406 --> 01:02:25,873
I'm in a pretty GREAT mood.
740
01:02:26,117 --> 01:02:28,851
How about tonight: first round is on me.
741
01:02:29,763 --> 01:02:30,763
(laughter)
742
01:02:31,206 --> 01:02:32,206
My man.
743
01:02:35,469 --> 01:02:39,464
Oh, Nalia. How did we even get into this mess?
744
01:02:40,548 --> 01:02:42,282
I'm sorry about all this.
745
01:02:43,159 --> 01:02:46,845
You really shouldn't even be here - I'm the one that should be locked up.
746
01:02:46,846 --> 01:02:49,916
You are free.
747
01:02:53,436 --> 01:02:57,064
Yes, I know, but you are free to go.
748
01:02:57,065 --> 01:02:58,345
I'll stay here.
749
01:02:59,242 --> 01:03:00,922
You're not even real.
750
01:03:04,322 --> 01:03:05,322
Sure. Sure.
751
01:03:20,505 --> 01:03:21,505
Hmm...
752
01:03:23,633 --> 01:03:25,677
(rain and thunder)
753
01:03:26,636 --> 01:03:28,972
(suspenseful music)
754
01:03:31,599 --> 01:03:34,311
(door closing suspiciously)
755
01:03:35,770 --> 01:03:37,450
(mysterious footsteps)
756
01:03:44,571 --> 01:03:47,490
(music and footsteps continue)
757
01:03:59,753 --> 01:04:02,072
(keypad beeps)
758
01:04:04,424 --> 01:04:06,104
(electric door opens)
759
01:04:15,810 --> 01:04:17,090
(keypad beeping)
760
01:04:19,856 --> 01:04:21,589
(electric cell door opens)
761
01:04:27,614 --> 01:04:29,347
(suspenseful music rising)
762
01:04:38,249 --> 01:04:39,529
(castle thunder)
763
01:04:51,638 --> 01:04:54,431
It's been you all along!
764
01:04:54,432 --> 01:04:56,112
Yes, Melvin! It's me!
765
01:04:56,726 --> 01:04:58,406
I'm THE MEDUSA KILLER!
766
01:04:58,770 --> 01:05:00,637
(insane villainous laughter)
767
01:05:02,941 --> 01:05:06,652
Why Agnes? I just want to know why.
768
01:05:06,653 --> 01:05:12,742
Well, nice girls don't get very far in show business, honey.
769
01:05:12,993 --> 01:05:15,645
It all started with Allison Bechdel.
770
01:05:17,247 --> 01:05:19,776
She was always the first to get called for gigs.
771
01:05:19,999 --> 01:05:23,007
First for a photoshoot! First for a commercial!
772
01:05:23,253 --> 01:05:29,968
With her perfect tan, her perfect little accent, and her little mole right on her left cheek.
773
01:05:30,810 --> 01:05:34,456
She told me I had a face for television...
774
01:05:35,474 --> 01:05:37,183
Television, Melvin?
775
01:05:37,943 --> 01:05:39,919
I have a face for movies!
776
01:05:40,186 --> 01:05:41,729
(thunder and lightning)
777
01:05:41,813 --> 01:05:43,939
I had to get rid of her somehow.
778
01:05:43,940 --> 01:05:45,149
So you killed her?
779
01:05:45,150 --> 01:05:48,777
How else was I supposed to get all the gigs I wanted, Melvin?
780
01:05:48,778 --> 01:05:51,990
Agnes, you're insane!
781
01:05:52,232 --> 01:05:56,102
That may be, Melvin... but very clever!
782
01:05:56,595 --> 01:05:59,663
Who would have thought to pour cement over bodies, huh?
783
01:05:59,664 --> 01:06:01,457
Me, that's who!
784
01:06:01,458 --> 01:06:03,376
Whose career is taking off, huh?
785
01:06:03,626 --> 01:06:06,087
Me... ME! THE MEDUSA KILLER!
786
01:06:06,379 --> 01:06:07,579
(thunder crash)
787
01:06:07,839 --> 01:06:09,811
(laser eyes charging up)
788
01:06:10,133 --> 01:06:13,803
And now, Melvin... it's come down to this.
789
01:06:14,429 --> 01:06:17,290
You. You just know too much.
790
01:06:19,017 --> 01:06:20,684
You have to go.
791
01:06:20,685 --> 01:06:24,272
Agnes, I would like you to take my advice.
792
01:06:24,981 --> 01:06:29,568
Nalia over there? She's a little over-protective about me and...
793
01:06:29,569 --> 01:06:33,473
If you leave right now, I promise you: You will be unharmed.
794
01:06:33,573 --> 01:06:37,951
Oh, yes. How could I forget: Little Miss Leopard Bikini?
795
01:06:37,952 --> 01:06:40,579
You don't want to do this, Agnes. Please trust me.
796
01:06:40,580 --> 01:06:44,708
Oh, what are you gonna do, honey?
Throw your little leapord thong at me?
797
01:06:44,709 --> 01:06:46,377
Pfft... really, Melvin?
798
01:06:46,628 --> 01:06:50,005
(laser eyes charging up loudly)
799
01:06:50,006 --> 01:06:51,506
Ooooh, I'm so scared!
800
01:06:51,507 --> 01:06:52,716
BOOOM!
801
01:06:53,509 --> 01:06:54,509
(laughter)
802
01:06:58,723 --> 01:07:00,003
(dramatic music)
803
01:07:04,395 --> 01:07:06,995
(flashing cameras in a murmuring crowd)
804
01:07:09,984 --> 01:07:11,664
(microphone feedback)
805
01:07:14,030 --> 01:07:15,114
Good morning.
806
01:07:15,198 --> 01:07:16,241
MAN: Good morning.
807
01:07:16,307 --> 01:07:19,635
I'm Detective Sandusky. This is Detective Sheppard.
808
01:07:19,911 --> 01:07:22,330
We want to thank you all for joining us today.
809
01:07:22,572 --> 01:07:25,457
It's been a very long and arduous journey for the both of us.
810
01:07:25,458 --> 01:07:28,044
I can say with full 100% confidence...
811
01:07:29,337 --> 01:07:30,337
We got him.
812
01:07:30,713 --> 01:07:31,713
(applause)
813
01:07:32,724 --> 01:07:33,724
Thank you, thank you.
814
01:07:34,008 --> 01:07:37,052
We'd just like to take a moment to set the record straight and clarify
815
01:07:37,053 --> 01:07:41,390
that The Medusa Killer is actually a "her" and not a "he" like we'd originally thought.
816
01:07:41,391 --> 01:07:44,644
The recent victims of the killer have actually come forth and been revived
817
01:07:44,727 --> 01:07:46,728
through a careful - yet secret - process
818
01:07:46,729 --> 01:07:49,929
and have confirmed the identity of the killer as a woman.
819
01:07:49,941 --> 01:07:52,808
REPORTER: Sir, can you explain the process?
820
01:07:52,986 --> 01:07:53,986
Fantastic.
821
01:07:54,053 --> 01:07:56,530
Now, we'd also like to take a moment to thank everyone
822
01:07:56,531 --> 01:07:59,366
involved with the investigation: the victims, the citizens...
823
01:07:59,367 --> 01:08:01,367
and everyone else at the police department.
824
01:08:01,411 --> 01:08:05,414
And, of course, the efforts of my good pal and partner: Phil Sandusky.
825
01:08:05,415 --> 01:08:06,935
Phil: bring it in.
826
01:08:07,125 --> 01:08:08,458
ELDERLY WOMAN: Yeah, I got a question!
827
01:08:08,459 --> 01:08:11,670
We understand you had a male suspect in custody yesterday...
828
01:08:11,671 --> 01:08:14,404
and suddenly you have a female in custody
829
01:08:15,091 --> 01:08:16,717
and the entire case is wrapped up...
830
01:08:16,718 --> 01:08:18,518
How would you explain this?
831
01:08:19,554 --> 01:08:22,020
BOTH: We're really good at our jobs.
832
01:08:22,557 --> 01:08:26,077
WARREN: So, the elusive Medusa Killer has been captured
833
01:08:26,603 --> 01:08:30,480
thanks to the help of a local pizza delivery man
834
01:08:30,481 --> 01:08:32,357
Melvin Kolbob
835
01:08:32,358 --> 01:08:35,887
and his lovely fiance: Saturnalia.
836
01:08:36,863 --> 01:08:38,989
I think it's pronounced Nah-lia.
837
01:08:38,990 --> 01:08:41,723
Anyway, as a reward for what he has done
838
01:08:42,035 --> 01:08:44,635
he has only asked for one small thing.
839
01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:46,401
(cheering crowd)
840
01:08:47,290 --> 01:08:50,626
And now, ladies and gentlemen
841
01:08:50,627 --> 01:08:54,739
presenting: Melvin Kolbaba...
842
01:08:55,048 --> 01:08:57,883
...and his lustrous partner:
843
01:08:57,884 --> 01:09:00,053
SATURNALIA!
844
01:09:00,428 --> 01:09:01,428
Ha ha ha ha!
845
01:09:02,597 --> 01:09:03,717
(epic fanfare)
846
01:09:18,571 --> 01:09:19,771
(audience boos)
847
01:09:22,617 --> 01:09:23,897
Boo! That sucks!
848
01:09:26,162 --> 01:09:27,362
BBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
849
01:09:29,248 --> 01:09:30,166
Hey, yeah...
850
01:09:31,876 --> 01:09:33,451
Yeah, alright!
851
01:09:34,087 --> 01:09:35,820
(audience starts cheering)
852
01:09:38,299 --> 01:09:39,739
BBBZZZZZZTTTTTT!!!
853
01:09:40,551 --> 01:09:42,418
(audience loses their minds)
854
01:09:47,809 --> 01:09:49,089
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
855
01:09:49,894 --> 01:09:51,174
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
856
01:09:51,938 --> 01:09:53,218
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
857
01:09:53,981 --> 01:09:55,261
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
858
01:09:56,401 --> 01:09:57,681
(music building)
859
01:10:04,492 --> 01:10:05,772
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
860
01:10:06,369 --> 01:10:07,649
BBBBZZZZZTTTTTT!
861
01:10:10,164 --> 01:10:11,444
(LASER INSANITY)
862
01:10:14,419 --> 01:10:15,939
(audience cheering)
863
01:10:17,339 --> 01:10:18,832
(Theme song begins)
864
01:10:19,340 --> 01:10:25,079
**WHO IS THE ONE THAT WILL SAVE US?**
865
01:10:26,180 --> 01:10:31,919
**WHO IS THE ONE THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS?**
866
01:10:33,112 --> 01:10:36,215
**DOES SHE HAVE A FLASHING EYE?**
867
01:10:36,758 --> 01:10:40,351
**IS HER BRA A GIANT SIZE?**
868
01:10:40,611 --> 01:10:47,701
**WILL HER FUR-BIKNI TERRIFY THE BRAVEST?**
869
01:10:47,702 --> 01:10:50,438
**SATURNALIA!**
870
01:10:51,914 --> 01:10:53,833
**SATURNALIA!**
871
01:10:55,209 --> 01:10:57,795
**SATURNALIA!**
872
01:10:59,046 --> 01:11:01,507
**SATURNALIA!**
873
01:11:47,512 --> 01:11:53,126
**STANDING FOR JUSTICE IS PROOF**
874
01:11:54,977 --> 01:12:00,566
**SHE ALWAYS WIELDS HER SPEAR OF TRUTH**
875
01:12:02,068 --> 01:12:04,679
**AND SHE WEARS TWO STRIPS OF FUR**
876
01:12:05,371 --> 01:12:09,407
**TO COVER UP PARTS OF HER**
877
01:12:09,408 --> 01:12:15,314
**CUZ MAMA DIDN'T RAISE THIS GIRL TO BE UNCOUTH**
878
01:12:16,374 --> 01:12:19,043
**SATURNALIA!**
879
01:12:20,336 --> 01:12:22,713
**SATURNALIA!**
880
01:12:24,090 --> 01:12:26,968
**SATURNALIA!**
881
01:12:27,718 --> 01:12:31,205
**SATURNALIA!**
882
01:12:31,931 --> 01:12:37,545
**SHE IS THE ENEMY OF FEAR**
883
01:12:39,313 --> 01:12:45,303
**JUSTICE AND TRUTH SHE HOLDS DEAR!**
884
01:12:46,112 --> 01:12:49,614
**FROM EIGHT-THOUSAND EIGHTY-EIGHT**
885
01:12:49,615 --> 01:12:53,368
**AND FROM SATURN'S MIGHTY GATE**
886
01:12:53,369 --> 01:12:59,609
**SHE'S A HERO THAT STILL HATES WHEN EVIL'S NEAR**
887
01:13:00,877 --> 01:13:04,547
**SATURNALIA!**
888
01:13:04,881 --> 01:13:07,884
**SATURNALIA!**
889
01:13:08,509 --> 01:13:11,454
**SATURNALIA!**
890
01:13:12,138 --> 01:13:15,082
**SATURNALIA!**
891
01:13:16,309 --> 01:13:17,989
**aaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHH**63557
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