All language subtitles for Cheers.S03E02.Rebound.2.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track4_[eng]

Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.

That's it, folks.
Closing it up.

Night, Coach.
See you later, Coach.

Night.
Good night, guys.

So, Normie,
what do you say,

you want to stop off
and get a bite to eat?

Come on, Cliff ie,
I have a wife to go home to.

Oh, that's all right.
We could stop by and pick her up.

You know, I haven't
met her yet.

Nah, I don't think so.
Not tonight.

Oh, whoa, whoa,
wait a minute, wait a minute.

Who are you ashamed of,
me or her?

A little of both, I guess.

Hey, everybody, I'm back.

Last week on Cheers,
yours truly, Cliff Clavin,

postman extraordinaire
and happy wanderer,

returned from a vacation

in the paradoxical state
of Florida.

It was an invigorating
and magnificent experience.

I'd like to tell you all about it,

but certain parties insist I fill you in

on the rest of the story,

so Diane and Sam,
as you may know,

had a little
falling-by-the-wayside.

After they went
their separate ways,

Sam went back to his old ones.

I didn't happen to get the license
of the wagon Sam fell off of,

but back to the bottle he went.

Diane, on her side,
went what we euphemistically call...

And spent a little time
in a hospital in the country.

After she got out,

Coach talked her into coming
into Cheers

to try and talk some sense into Sam.

She talked him to seeing
a psychiatrist of her acquaintance.

Sam agreed, not knowing
that said shrink and said Diane

were dating steadily,
and rumor has it, heavily.

Sam, in fact, is laboring
under the misconception

that Diane
still carries a torch for him,

and Diane, naturally, thinks

that Sam is the torchbearer
in this situation.

You know something?

I think I may have
the wrong batch of slides here.

These are my snaps of FLA.

Ah, well, you all know
what Sam and Diane look like,

but a lot of you
poor old pasty wretches

have never seen
the old Sunshine state.

What we're looking at here is--

Hey!
All right, who pulled the plug?

Oh, very funny, wise guy.
Come on.

You're a failure in everything
you've ever tried to do,

and you're gutless, because you
won't admit you're a failure.

You've hurt your friends.
You've hurt everyone

who's ever tried to reach out to you.
You make me sick!

Sam, tell me what's on your mind.

I'm wondering how much
this is going to cost me.

You're thinking of money.

Yeah, I hope
it's not going to be a lot,

because the truth is,

I get Diane to come in here
and do this for free.

She used to abuse me for free
all the time.

Well, it wasn't exactly free.

I had to sleep with her.

You know, Sam,
beneath your flippancy,

I sense a lot of hostility towards Diane,

and towards myself.

Look, I haven't had a drink
in ten days.

I know I've got a problem,
but I'm going to AA,

and I really think
I'm going to be okay.

No, you're better than okay, Sam.

You're abundantly human.

Didn't you just say
I made you sick a minute ago?

I was confronting you, Sam.

Forget about a minute ago.

I am now telling you
that you're abundantly human.

Well, great, great, because

I really think I'm going
to be able to handle this now.

I don't.

Hey, I'm abundantly human,
remember?

Sam, don't you see
what I'm doing here?

I'm putting you
on an emotional pendulum.

Oh, I-- I don't want to be
on an emotional anything.

I just want to quit.

- Uh-oh.
- What?

This is very distressing.

I hear Sam the failure talking.

You said I was abundantly human,
twice.

An abundantly human person
is not resistant to change.

I want to quit. That's a change.

Sam, you're becoming
compulsive on this point.

I think we should
double our sessions.

Double?
Oh, come on, Frasier.

I'm going to be okay, really.

Well, your progress
has been remarkable.

Good, good.

Let's quit before
you change your mind.

Sam!
There's that word "quit" again!

Do you realize
that you keep saying it?

Could you stop saying it
if you wanted to?

Frasier?

Sam, I know a quiet,
peaceful little place

in the country.

I could get you in
for the weekend.

Lovely grounds, nice food,
dress is casual.

In fact, your tie and belt
will be confiscated.

Frasier, I'm not going
to a hospital.

I am not going to have
any more sessions.

We're through. That's it.
Now, get the hell out of here!

Sam! We did it!

Did what?

You're a whole person, Sam.

Really, I mean that.

- I am?
- You stood up to me and took control.

You're no longer a man who needs
to run away from his problems,

who needs to drink,

needs to spend his weekends
at a hospital in the sticks

bombed on Thorazine.

Goodbye, Sam. Be well.

Oh, Frasier, wait a minute.

Sam, Sam, you must
break this attachment.

Swim, Sam, swim.

No, no, Frasier, no,

I just want you to tell me

what you think put Diane
in a ha-ha house.

Well, I'm not her doctor,
and even if I were,

I couldn't discuss it
with you.

Ah, it doesn't matter.

I know she went nuts
because I kicked her out of here.

And by the way, Sam,

I don't think you should
use the word "nuts"

when discussing Diane.

Well, you've met her.

Give me a better one.

Bonkers.

You see, you don't need alcohol
to have fun.

In my profession,

there's no such thing
as a closed door.

That explains
how Diane got out.

You know,
as long as you hang on

to that wonderful
sense of humor,

I don't think you can ever
go completely astray.

Goodbye, everybody.

So long, Doc.

Hey, Frasier.

Say hello
to all your loons for me.

Carla, why do you keep
building walls

between yourself
and everyone else?

Have you taken a good look
at everyone else?

Touché.

Here's to Sammy.

Ten days without the slow death
of demon alcohol.

No, no. Come on, you guys,
don't toast me for that.

I tell you, getting back on the bottle
was the stupidest thing I ever did.

I was reading in an article
the other day,

alcohol actually eats huge holes
in the tissue of your...

You know,
some people like bartenders

who tell great stories and jokes.

Ah, no, give me a good
temperance lecture anytime.

I'm sorry, you guys.

Yeah, well, I just thank God

I don't have
an alcoholic personality.

You don't have a personality.

Carla, I'm going to resist
the temptation

of hurling a rejoinder
in your direction

primarily out of the respect I bear
for members of your gender.

Please make sure that's all you bare
for members of my gender.

Hello, everybody.

Coach, come here.

Coach, this is the moment
I've been dreading.

Why, Sam?

Well, Diane's here,

and she's probably going to beg me
to get back together again.

- I'm going to have to break her heart.
- Oh, my God, that's terrible.

No, the terrible thing
is I'm looking forward to it.

And then after being
in the Everglades a couple of days,

the Seminole Indians found me
and made me

an honorary mail carrier
of their tribe.

Hi.

Hi. Sam, is Frasier here?

No, he just left.
We finished our session.

- Oh.
- He's making remarkable progress.

Well, it's you
I want to talk to anyway.

Yeah, I know. I figured.

Well, you probably
still remember

where the office is, right?

Oh, yes, I've seen it
in my dreams.

Coach, I'm going
to take a break here.

Hey, Coach,

who's "Miss God's Gift to the World"?

Gee, I didn't see the show
this year, honey.

I think Miss Kansas won.

Strange to be here again.

Whoo!

Using a new cologne?

Oh, no, that's the roach bomb.

But, you know,
hey, that's not a...

Yes, well...
down to business.

Sam...

There's something
I've been keeping from you

and I've got to tell you,
and tell you now.

Well, there's something
I need to say to you,

and I think I ought to go first.

No, no, I think
maybe I should go first.

Maybe. I...

- I'm over you.
- I'm over you.

- You're over me?
- You're over me?

- Well, you don't think that I still--
- You don't think that I--

- Well, of course--
- You bet you--

- You thought that--
- You thought--

- Well, so did you!
- So did you!

We keep doing it!

Coach, I think something we thought
we'd seen the last of

is just about to resurface.

Yeah, my lunch.

Ah...

- Diane?
- Mm?

Rest assured,
I have no feelings left for you.

Nothing.

I assure you,
I feel less than nothing for you.

Then there's nothing
really left to say.

There is one other thing
you should know.

It's quite important, really.

There's another man in my life
and he's someone you know.

Really? Who?

Frasier and I have been lovers
for several weeks.

Ew...

What do you mean, "ew"?

No, I'm sorry. I just got
a little mental picture there.

It took me by surprise.

Well...

why didn't you
say something sooner?

Well, Frasier didn't want to tell you

because he was afraid
it would interfere with your therapy.

We had a terrible fight about it.

No, actually, we had
a wonderful fight about it.

Frasier has taught me
that fighting can be wonderful

if you lay out the ground rules,
share your hurt,

and never lose respect

for the other person's
abundant humanness.

Boy, you people with full lives.

- Well...
- Well...

Wait a second here.

Guys, I think
you ought to hear this.

Diane here's got herself a new fella.

It turns out

that she and Frasier Crane
are lovers.

Ew.

What do you mean, "ew"?

I mean, "Ew two should be
very happy together."

Sam, I thought you said
she was still nuts about you.

Well, I was wrong, Coach,
and I'm happy to be wrong.

Me too.

Well...

I guess this is goodbye.

Yeah, I guess it is.

Diane, what're you doing here?

I've been looking all over for you.

Oh, Frasier,
I'm so glad you're here.

Ew!

Diane, you shared
our happy secret

with Sam, didn't you?

Yes, and he took it
wonderfully.

In fact, just to show you
how wonderfully,

let me buy you a drink here.

Why, thanks, Sam.

I'll have a white wine spritzer.

Well, okay,
I'll have one, too.

It's our drink.

You two meet in the bin,
did you?

Yes...

and it isn't a bin.

Goldenbrook
is a pastoral retreat.

Did you hold hands
during the lobotomy?

Carla...

Diane, take a joke.

I love you.

Frasier is a consulting psychiatrist
at Goldenbrook.

He wasn't my therapist.

How did you two
get together?

I was playing croquet
on the north lawn

one beautiful morning.

It's a game I learned
during my stay there,

and I got quite good at it.

I saw you do that.

You are a naughty, naughty girl.

- It wasn't...
- You are very naughty.

I saw you do it. Admit it.
Come on, be a grown-up.

It was amazing to me

how I could just lose myself
in the flow of the game.

Now I'm annoyed.

I found when I played
with someone of equal ability,

it gave me an appreciation

for the nobler aspects
of sport and competition.

What is this business?

No, I'm not going to
play with you anymore.

Well, fine, then go to--
Oh! Oh!

Frazier happened by
in the midst of this spirited contest

and he stopped
to correct a flaw in my swing.

My opponent
on that particular day

was as crafty
a strategist as I.

We really brought out the best
in each other.

Oh!

Oh, ladies...

Girls!

Ladies!

Frasier remained
not only to watch my game,

but to good-naturedly arbitrate
a close call for us.

I must admit
that under the attentive gaze

of a distinguished doctor,

I lost some of my concentration
on the game itself.

You shouldn't be allowed
on the croquet lawn!

- Who's your doctor?
- Who would have guessed

that a leisurely game
of croquet

would provide me
with such a trophy?

Indeed.

That's quite a story.

How is your romantic life
going, Sam?

I'm dating a girl right now

that I think may just turn out

to be the woman I've been
waiting for all my life.

- Sam...
- Thank you.

Sam Malone.

You went out with my sister.

How did you think

that wasn't going
to get back to me? Huh?

I have had just about as much
as I can take from you.

As far as I'm concerned,
you never existed.

Well, the search continues.

Swim, Sam, swim.

Great, great.

Now I've got to work

another Saturday night by myself.

Sam, you promised
you weren't going to boink

any more waitresses
in this joint

unless it was me.

Well, obviously, I'm going to have
to find somebody to fill this job

who I can keep my hands off of.

You looking
for work?

Thank you very much
for the very attractive offer,

but I'm not interested.

Well, no, I understand.

I mean, how silly of me.

You couldn't possibly
come back to work here.

What are you talking about?

Well, it's, well,
it's interesting.

I mean, it doesn't bother me
at all,

but obviously it creates
kind of a problem for you.

Frasier, could we go now,
please?

Of course, dear.

I guess this is goodbye for now,
Sam, but remember,

there's no such thing
as a former patient.

I think you'll find that once
you've been a patient of mine,

I'm always there when you...

Oh, great!

I'll bet this is important.

Where's the phone?

In the hallway
over there.

Why don't you
have a seat here?

No, thank you.

I understand.

What do you
understand?

Well, I assume that

what you said in the office there
was the truth,

but obviously you're feeling
some kind of sexual tension around me.

I guess sitting that close
would be kind of rough on you.

The fact of the matter

is I don't want to work here

because I think
I have a better lot in store

than a life of serving beer
to squamulous laggards.

Please, Diane,
the man's in the room.

When Frasier comes back,

will you tell him
I'm waiting outside, please?

I understand, really.

Maybe it'd be safer
to wait around the corner there.

I do give off this kind of aura.

- That's the roach bomb.
- Ah!

Diane, Di--

Listen, Diane, please.

I have something to say to you,
and it's straight from here.

What is it, Coach?

Well, this is my heart, isn't it?

Yes, yes, it is.

Diane, honey,
if you walk out that door,

he's back on the bottle.

Oh, well, I can't be
responsible for that.

Please, Diane,

don't tear his heart out
again, please.

You'd be doing us both
a big favor

if you'd just stick around
for a little while,

a couple-- three weeks...

Just till
he gets back on his feet.

Please.

Well, I've gone this far.

I might as well persist
until he's recovered.

She's back!

If Frasier approves,
I'll stick around

and help you
through your waitress problem.

Whoa, wait a second here.

You mean to tell me

you're actually coming back
to work here?

I'll take it
until a better job comes along.

Cleaning up after rodeos,
for instance.

Great, huh, Sam?

Diane's back.

Great.

What did you say to her?

It was easy.

I said... she walks out that door,

she's back in that nuthouse
within a month.

Oh, I see.

You're not going
to tell her, are you?

No, of course not.

Well, welcome aboard,
Miss Chambers.

Thank you, Mr. Malone.

That Coach is
a pretty smart fella sometimes,

isn't he?

Yes, he is, Sam.

Well, enough said about that.

Yeah, enough.

Well, Diane, shall we be off?

Oh, Frasier, I think

I'm going to come back
to work here.

What?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No.

Listen,
as Frasier Crane, M.D.,

I don't think
that's a good idea

for the two of you.

And as Frasier Crane, man,

I don't think
it's a good idea

for the three of us.

Frasier, listen to me.

Sam needs my help
in the bar.

If you feel any spark
of jealousy,

please,
let me assure you,

I could work side by side
with this man

for the rest of my life
and feel nothing.

Work? Hell, I could live
in the same house with her

and never be tempted.

I could sleep in the same bed

and get...

nothing but a good night's rest.

I could get out of jail
after 12 years,

serve on a ship with an all-male crew
for another four,

be dropped off on a desert island
for another three,

eating nothing but raw oysters,

and if Diane were

to walk out of the surf naked
one day,

all I'd want from her
would be the hockey scores.

And you wouldn't even
get that.

I'm afraid
that's not good enough.

Diane, we're leaving.

Excuse me, Diane.

Doc, could I have a word
with you, please?

What about?

Listen, Doc...

You take her
out that door now,

and those two
will be dreaming

dreams about each other
from now on.

But, if she worked
here, Doctor,

hatred.

Ooh!

You know,
I'm glad Coach stopped me

to ask about
career opportunities

in psychiatry.

Yes, Harvard is excellent.

You see, it gave me
some time to reflect.

Diane, you must
come back to work.

I must?

You and Sam went through
a violent emotional experience.

Now this will give you
an opportunity to defuse,

to de-mythologize
your romance.

Isn't he amazing?

Abundantly.

Sammy, are you going
to tell Carla?

Yeah, maybe you ought
to give me a hand here.

Yeah.
Right.

What-- what's this all about?

Hey! Hey!

Got her?

Check.

Carla... Diane's coming back
to work here.

Really?

At last, some help.

And she's had experience too.

I hope she can start right away.

Nah, nah, nah, nah...
take her in the back.

Oh, you think
I'm going to try to kill her

or hurt her or maim her?
No, no, no.

Walls, walls, walls.

Well, Sam, Diane and I
really must be going,

but it looks like
we'll be seeing each other again.

Yeah, I guess we will.

Hey, Frasier,

let me congratulate you here
on your new honey.

Why, thanks, Sam.

I've never been happier.

Let me congratulate you too, Diane.

Oh, for heaven's sake,
give her a kiss.

Yeah, why not?

Why not?
Seems appropriate.

- Sam...
- Mm.

Now there's
a healthy beginning.

Nuts about me.

Pitiful.