Original subtitles

my face

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starring tommy redig as jeff miller

jan clayton as his mother ellen

george cleveland as gramps

and of course lassie

another bullseye graham

you're getting pretty good with that

foreigner is it two bulls eyes out of

five that's good might be good

let's go hunting at first off i got to

fix this screen door for you more choose

me out about flies in the kitchen

and second off

going hunting with the bow and arrow is

mighty tricky business well the indians

did it they hunted deer and buffalo and

in my geography book there's a picture

of an african hutton up

rhinoceros

a fella named william tales shot an

apple off his boy's head with the bow

and arrow

you wouldn't want me to try that on you

would you i wouldn't be afraid honest i

wouldn't gramps maybe you wouldn't but i

sure would

if i could make two bull's eyes out of

five why couldn't i hit something like a

rabbit because a rabbit don't sit still

and wait for you to hit him it's hard

enough to hit a high tail and rabbit

with a shotgun let alone one of them

errors well me and lassie are going out

and try and if i get one will you skin

them for me gramps look i'll not only

skin them but i'll get you more to make

a rabbit stew with dumplings and i'll

give you a dollar to vote you will honor

right

shake on it shake

thanks grant come on

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there would be some rabbits around here

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so

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a lion i saw a lion in the woods yeah

that's the tallest tale i ever heard oh

honest friends i could have just reached

out and touched them

give me that chisel

gramps i wouldn't say i saw a lion

unless i saw one i out of no one when i

see one where he was with me you were

just lucky i guess i've been trapping

these woods for years and i never

spotted one but i did see a five-legged

mule at the county fair one time now run

along i got to get this fixture

i saw a lion in the woods

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and there were four elephants and six

giraffes all standing on their heads

well what do you know

jeff what did you say

i said i saw a lion in the woods you

mean about that no a real lion with a

big lane and stuff

oh well tell him we're having cold cuts

for supper and we'd love to have him

join us

you don't believe me

of course i believe you beat it

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[Applause]

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jeff sylvester called who

sylvester brockway what do you mean

porky i mean sylvester his mother said

be all right and spend the night and

he'll be over in about an hour

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grams what would you do if you were

telling the truth and nobody believed

you well if you tell the truth everybody

believe you look gramps if you told me

you saw a lion i'd believe you well if i

told you

it would be true not me believe

gramps

what do you call somebody that thinks

they see something that's not really

there well i guess i'd call him nuts

well that's not what i mean

just the same do you think lassie and me

are nuts

well

since you asked about it

no

well if i'm not nuts i saw a lion then

i'm the queen of england so we're even

okay i believe that you're the queen of

england and i'll even call you your

royal highness if you'll believe that i

saw a lion okay it's a deal now run

along oh no we gotta do something about

it

about the lion i saw lions are dangerous

you can't just let them run around loose

jeff you're a caution but don't you see

one of the lions is liable to get to a

farm and get after the cattle are people

even look what's cut into you lions live

in uh india or africa or someplace like

that i don't care i saw a lion and so

did lassie didn't you girl

how long did it take you to learn that

trick oh grams

all right then there's only one thing i

can figure to get me peace and quiet

around here you're going to take me to

where you saw this line or whatever it

was you did see okay but you better get

a gun or something not me i kill lions

bare-handed before breakfast now come on

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grams you should have brought the gun

like i told you

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[Applause]

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well it wasn't a cow the first time it

was a lion well just remember to call me

your royal highness jess sylvester's

here she means me hi

your mom made me a sandwich come on in

i'll give you one too

and uh form a glass of lion's milk

where you been

hunting

honey what

lions

catching me

saw one he got away

those kids

oh jeff tell you we found his lion oh

you did yeah

turned out to be one of joe king's cows

i don't know where that boy gets his

imagination from

that you believe in heredity

oh there's a phone

yes

long distance

it wouldn't be somebody looking for a

lion would it oh here give me that phone

hello

oh hello mother everything all right

dear

oh

oh for goodness sakes how in the world

did you do that

oh that's dreadful

well of course honey i'll i'll have dad

drive me over right away

oh now listen don't worry about them

they'll be all right for a few days

all right yes i'll tell them

all right dear see you soon bye-bye

something wrong with grandma

yeah she slipped and hurt her knee gosh

dad dad could you drive me to capital

city oh i guess we can yes mother had a

little accident oh oh just hurt her knee

but i better be there i'd drive myself

but i'll be gone a few days and you'll

probably need the car well i'll get

cleaned up is jeff going along too oh no

sylvester's here and you'll be back in

time for supper it's all ready now

listen i'll only be a few minutes i'm

just gonna put a few things in the

suitcase okay yeah

don't go away now cause i'm gonna be

right out

look

you boys put this in the barn i'll be

finishing when i come back

you sure are grumpy today i've got

problems money

lions

so you'll catch the next one you can't

be at a thousand but nobody will believe

i saw one

okay

i believe you now stop being such crummy

company what do you want to do

how about putting nasty through some of

our tricks okay come on lassie

stay sit

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sit up

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lie down

on your side

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stay

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now you two boys are in charge until

grass gets back okay mom

um i'll be back toward the end of the

week now be a good boy jeff and mind

grabs okay until grandma i'm sorry she

hurt her leg i will dear oh come on we

never get a minute wait i haven't

finished telling them there's food in

the ice box in case you get hungry

during the afternoon and let me see what

else should i tell oh mom i'm no baby

of course not have a good time sylvester

goodbye dawning oh come on let's go

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let's put those things in the barn like

grants told us

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what is your grandfather coming back i

don't know pretty soon i guess the thing

i don't like about night is it gets dark

here i found it listen

lions live mainly in the plains of

africa

mesetopinia wherever that is just so

it's nowhere around here

this part's no good

wait lions are in the main knock turtle

nocturnal

what's that mean

this means they knock things down

they catch their prey bounding from

ambush or by careful stalking over a

short distance they can gallop very fast

their principal food is antelopes water

buffalos zebras and giraffes that lets

us out

in cultivated districts they often eat

sheep and cattle

and sometimes attack human beings

did you have to read that part

confirmed man-eaters are usually old

animals

like the speed to catch other wild game

how old was the one you saw

oh no how can you tell

well i hope he was really young

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see anything

it sure is quiet

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hello

oh hi gramps

yeah sure

how long do you think

oh okay

bye

wouldn't you know it what's the matter

rams car broke down he stuck for a while

but he'll be home as soon as he can

while we fix our own dinner

think i should call my pup and tell him

to come over

what'd you say

were a couple of kids scared of the dark

never believe about the lion

and then that's it i'm never too scared

to eat

you know

maybe it was a cow i saw instead of a

lion you should have tried to milk it

then you know

oh what are you wanting there's soup

beans ham roast beef cherry pie cherry

pie

well i'll put it all out and we can take

what we want

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so

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if there was something out there we'd

see it

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yeah we didn't see it we'd hear it yeah

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tell me the truth is not a cow i wish it

was but what are we gonna do i don't

know

we gotta get help call somebody who

would believe us nobody believe you if

you said you saw a lion if you said

there was one in the backyard wow what

if he tries to get in the house the

telephone i'll call jenny maybe we can

get the lion to roar so she'll hear

people believed the telephone operator

if she said she heard a lion sure

is he still there

hello jenny

this is jeff miller wow how are you dave

fine thanks

say jenny what would you say if i said i

saw a lion oh one of them stuffed ones

no a real lion like in the zoo

oh you saw a lion in the zoo well i'd

like to hear about it no not in the zoo

here here on the farm

well you know i just wouldn't believe it

jeff not for a minute

yeah that's what i thought

hold on a minute jenny

do something to make him roar

stand up so he can see you

oh god i do it except i'm on the phone

hello jenny

it was real nice talking to you

bye

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he sure must like it around here yes he

smells us so nasty and hoping we'll come

out

well even if he stays here for for six

years i'm not moving an inch

at least when gramps gets home they'll

see i was telling the truth

hey i just thought of something terrible

rex doesn't know about the lion he'll

drive up and get out of the car

we gotta do something could we hang a

sign out the front window we couldn't

see it from the road

what about lassie what about her we

could send her out and warn your

grandfather are you crazy swallower in

one bite but we gotta do something

i've got it i'll call a constable and

tell him a bunch of bank robbers are

trying to break into the house yeah and

tell him they got guns and knives and

everything and i'll be real careful he

won't believe about the lion but bank

robbers are people people are every

place

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[Applause]

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hello janet get me the constable please

quick what's the matter jeff something

wrong

bank robbers

oh for goodness sakes jeff what an idea

you really had me worried

she doesn't believe me gosh nobody

believes anything a kid says

now you go to bed jeff miller stop

playing pranks i got enough to do

without you but oh hold on just a minute

will you jeff

calverton central

landsake's alive

yes

yes of course

hello jeff

didn't you call me about a lion yes i

did but you didn't believe me so this

time i said it was bank robbers

well don't worry i'm not going to get

anywheres near him oh he's been out in

the yard for i don't know how long

hurry bye

she says she got weird from the circus

that lion escaped and he's somewhere

around here

she's telling us

she's called the constable the people

from the circus and they've got men out

looking for him they sure won't have to

look far

yeah come here

looks like he's getting impatient we're

hungry don't say that

maybe if we give him something to eat

what if we threw this roast beef out the

door you're gonna open the door with him

standing there well

i could go over and tap on the window

then maybe he'd come around to see what

the noise was and you can open the door

and pitch out the beef

who opens in whole pitches

here i bit you yeah

wait we're wasting our time on this

lions don't like hook mead

how do you know

well it's figures

we're in luck

i've got a piece of raw meat

yeah we sure are in luck

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here he is hurry up

oh go on hurry up don't be afraid

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go on

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that didn't fill him up it's just an

appetizer hope he doesn't come back for

the main course

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he's trying to get in

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me

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he's heading across the meadow go ahead

oh chair we glad to see you we sure are

you boys all right yeah where's the lion

circus men are after they'll get him

they know how to handle lines so does

lassie

that must be grams

hi gramps hey you kids all right sure

the lion busted through the door

wait a minute what's what's all this

what what's what what's happened here

what's happening

the lion did that

look

if i hear that word lying again i'm

going to tell you both good now what

happened to that stove

well

uh something escaped from the circus was

in the yard all night

busted through the door and smashed up

the stove we ran to the barn and the

constable came with some men from the

circus they caught the

the something

and took it away

look maybe i can get a little sense out

of you what happened to the stove

okay

joe king's cow busted down the stove

but here's the hundred dollars the

circus man gave me for catching the cow

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[Applause]

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you