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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:14,875 [ Girl ] I JUST HOPE IT DOESN’T CAUSE ANY PERMANENT DAMAGE. 2 00:00:20,500 --> 00:00:23,500 SO, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE, ANYWAY ? 3 00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:25,291 [ Boy ] A WHILE. 4 00:00:26,792 --> 00:00:28,834 [ Girl ] YOU MISSED YOUR PROM ? 5 00:00:28,834 --> 00:00:30,625 [ Boy ] YEAH. 6 00:00:33,917 --> 00:00:37,291 [ Boy Sighs ] THE THING IS, 7 00:00:37,291 --> 00:00:39,583 WHEN I MADE THAT BET-- OOH ! OOH ! 8 00:00:39,583 --> 00:00:42,583 [ TV: Boy Continues Talking ] THERE HE IS. THAT’S FREDDIE. 9 00:00:42,583 --> 00:00:45,667 - HE’S WEARING A TUX. - HEY, WHAT’S UP ? 10 00:00:45,667 --> 00:00:47,917 [ Boy ] I’M THAT WHOLE OTHER PERSON INSIDE OF YOU. 11 00:00:47,917 --> 00:00:51,583 [ Girl ] I GUESS. THERE’S A WHOLE OTHER PERSON INSIDE OF BOTH OF US. 12 00:00:51,583 --> 00:00:53,417 [ TV: Conversation Continues ] 13 00:01:06,583 --> 00:01:09,375 [ Gasps, Chuckles ] 14 00:01:11,041 --> 00:01:13,291 SHH. 15 00:01:13,291 --> 00:01:17,125 [ Vibrator Buzzing ] 16 00:01:17,125 --> 00:01:21,000 - WOULD THE WHOLE OTHER PERSON INSIDE OF YOU... - [ Gasping, Groaning ] 17 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,792 LIKE TO DANCE ? 18 00:01:24,792 --> 00:01:26,959 YES. 19 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:30,500 - MORNING, SWEETIE ! [ Chuckling ] - OH ! DADDY ! 20 00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:34,166 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE ? - WHAT DID I COME IN HERE FOR ? 21 00:01:34,166 --> 00:01:37,250 - IT’S HER BIRTHDAY, DAD. - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SWEETIE ! 22 00:01:37,250 --> 00:01:40,166 [ Vibrator Continues Buzzing ] 23 00:01:40,166 --> 00:01:42,583 - [ Moaning ] - WHAT’S THAT BUZZING SOUND ? 24 00:01:42,583 --> 00:01:46,125 I JUST... NEED A MINUTE HERE. 25 00:01:46,125 --> 00:01:48,250 MAYBE THEY’RE STILL DOING THAT CONSTRUCTION NEXT DOOR. 26 00:01:48,250 --> 00:01:50,750 - [ Old Man ] WHERE’S MY LITTLE ANGEL ? - [ Gasps ] 27 00:01:50,750 --> 00:01:54,083 - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HONEY. - GRANDMA ? GRANDPA ? 28 00:01:54,083 --> 00:01:55,875 ROSCO ! [ Whines ] 29 00:01:55,875 --> 00:01:58,625 [ Moaning Intensifies ] [ Vibrator Continues Buzzing ] 30 00:01:58,625 --> 00:02:01,000 ROSCO, GO. 31 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,875 - HELLO, JANEY ! - FATHER O’FLANNAGAN ? 32 00:02:03,875 --> 00:02:07,333 I BROUGHT SOME OF YOUR SPECIAL FRIENDS DOWN FROM THE CENTER TO WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY. 33 00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:11,250 - [ Kids ] HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JANEY ! - OH. HI. 34 00:02:11,250 --> 00:02:13,458 - [ Whines ] - OKAY, MAKE A WISH, DEAR. 35 00:02:13,458 --> 00:02:15,709 [ Continues Moaning ] OH-- NO ! 36 00:02:17,208 --> 00:02:20,083 - [ All Gasping ] - [ Moaning, Shrieking ] 37 00:02:20,083 --> 00:02:21,875 [ Pop ] 38 00:02:21,875 --> 00:02:23,417 [ Continues Buzzing ] 39 00:02:26,083 --> 00:02:29,834 OH ! 40 00:02:29,834 --> 00:02:32,917 ♪♪ [ Rock ] [ Man ] LET’S BEGIN NOW. 41 00:02:32,917 --> 00:02:43,667 ♪♪ 42 00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:46,417 THIS IS NOT YOUR TYPICAL HIGH SCHOOL. 43 00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:51,333 SEE, HERE AT JOHN HUGHES THERE ARE NO CLIQUES, NO EXCLUSIVE SOCIAL GROUPS. 44 00:02:51,333 --> 00:02:55,000 YOU’RE ACCEPTED FOR WHO YOU ARE, NOT WHO YOU HANG OUT WITH. 45 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:59,375 WE’RE GONNA DIVIDE THE TOUR INTO SMALLER GROUPS SO YOU CAN GET TO KNOW YOUR PEERS BETTER. 46 00:02:59,375 --> 00:03:02,875 LET’S GET ALL YOU BIG, JOCKY GUYS OVER TO MY RIGHT IN ONE GROUP, 47 00:03:02,875 --> 00:03:06,583 AND THEN GET YOU SLUTTY GIRLS OVER HERE BY ME. 48 00:03:06,583 --> 00:03:09,000 HEY. HOW YOU DOIN’ ? WELCOME. 49 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:12,083 AND, UH, YOU LOSERS, YOU GUYS SHOULD HANG OUT IN THE BACK. 50 00:03:12,083 --> 00:03:16,000 - THAT CLEARLY INCLUDES YOU. COME ON, GET BACK THERE. - [ Nerd Whines ] 51 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:18,875 TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT THE KID STANDING BESIDE YOU. 52 00:03:18,875 --> 00:03:20,917 - [ Murmuring ] - HEY. 53 00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:23,959 THEY’RE GONNA BE YOUR ONLY FRIENDS FOR THE NEXT FOUR YEARS. 54 00:03:23,959 --> 00:03:26,458 OKAY, LET’S MOVE IT, PEOPLE ! 55 00:03:26,458 --> 00:03:28,917 [ Cheering ] 56 00:03:35,667 --> 00:03:38,500 YOU REALLY NEED TO START DATING. 57 00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:40,917 I DON’T DATE. YOU KNOW THAT. 58 00:03:40,917 --> 00:03:45,083 JANEY, YOU KNOW DAD’S RULE. IF YOU DON’T HAVE SEX, THEN I’M NOT ALLOWED TO. 59 00:03:45,083 --> 00:03:48,500 LOOK, MITCH, I DON’T CONFORM TO TYPICAL HIGH SCHOOL NORMS. 60 00:03:48,500 --> 00:03:53,083 I READ SYLVIA PLATH, I LISTEN TO BIKINI KILL AND I EAT TOFU. 61 00:03:53,083 --> 00:03:55,041 I’M A UNIQUE REBEL. 62 00:03:55,041 --> 00:03:58,125 - SOUNDS MORE LIKE YOU’RE A LESBO. - [ Dad ] HEY, MITCH. 63 00:03:58,125 --> 00:04:00,959 - LEAVE YOUR SISTER ALONE. - THANK YOU, DADDY. 64 00:04:00,959 --> 00:04:04,041 IF JANEY WANTS TO BE A RUG MUNCHER, THAT’S HER DECISION. 65 00:04:05,709 --> 00:04:08,583 WASPS, GET THAT T.D. ! OKAY, GO, FIGHT, WIN ! 66 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:14,792 - ALL RIGHT ! - OHH ! 67 00:04:14,792 --> 00:04:18,125 - [ All Gasping ] - [ Cheerleader ] NICE COMBINATION, SUSIE ! 68 00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:20,250 [ Crash ] [ Onlookers Gasping, Groaning ] 69 00:04:21,625 --> 00:04:23,625 OH ! WHOA ! 70 00:04:23,625 --> 00:04:26,625 I’VE BEEN MEANING TO GET THAT FIXED. 71 00:04:26,625 --> 00:04:28,625 LATER, DAD. 72 00:04:28,625 --> 00:04:32,750 HEY, UH, I MIGHT BE LATE TO PICK YOU GUYS UP. 73 00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:36,166 - WHY ? DO YOU HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW TODAY, DADDY ? - NO, HONEY. 74 00:04:36,166 --> 00:04:38,583 I’LL PROBABLY JUST BE WAY TOO DRUNK. 75 00:04:38,583 --> 00:04:41,333 THAT’S GOOD. WE DON’T WANT YOU DRINKING AND DRIVING. 76 00:04:41,333 --> 00:04:45,417 OH, I’LL BE DRIVING. I’LL JUST BE TOO SHIT-FACED TO REMEMBER TO PICK YOU GUYS UP. 77 00:04:45,417 --> 00:04:48,375 OKAY. BYE, DADDY. 78 00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:50,333 BYE, PUMPKIN HEAD. 79 00:04:55,542 --> 00:04:57,542 [ Boy ] OH, MY GOD ! [ Dad ] GET OUT OF THE ROAD ! 80 00:04:57,542 --> 00:04:59,417 [ Screaming ] 81 00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:18,208 OH, MY GOD ! IT’S JAKE ! [ Giggling ] 82 00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:20,583 HE’S SO FINE. HI, STUD. 83 00:05:20,583 --> 00:05:23,583 HI, JAKE. I LOVE WHAT HE DOES WITH HIS EYEBROWS. 84 00:05:23,583 --> 00:05:25,583 OH, AND THOSE SIDEBURNS. 85 00:05:25,583 --> 00:05:28,542 OH, MY GOD, THERE’S JAKE. HE’S SO POPULAR ! 86 00:05:28,542 --> 00:05:30,417 OH. [ Girl Squeals ] 87 00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:32,959 HI ! [ Girl ] OH, MY GOD, HE JUST LOOKED AT ME. 88 00:05:32,959 --> 00:05:34,959 [ Girl ] HERE ! YOU CAN KEEP IT ! 89 00:05:34,959 --> 00:05:36,959 [ Girl ] HI, JAKE ! IT’S ALL WET ! 90 00:05:36,959 --> 00:05:38,959 [ Sniffs ] MELANIE. 91 00:05:38,959 --> 00:05:40,500 AAH ! OH, THOSE ARE MINE ! 92 00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:42,250 [ Boy ] HEY, JAKE. 93 00:05:42,250 --> 00:05:44,041 HEY, ARTHUR. 94 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:55,500 HE-E-E-E-ERE’S RICKY ! 95 00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:57,750 HEY, RICKY. WHAT’D YOU DO THIS WEEKEND ? 96 00:05:57,750 --> 00:06:02,417 WELL, UH, FRIDAY NIGHT I STOOD OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW IN THE POURING RAIN, 97 00:06:02,417 --> 00:06:04,417 SCREAMING YOUR NAME FOR SEVERAL HOURS. 98 00:06:04,417 --> 00:06:08,667 AND THEN I SPENT ALL OF SATURDAY AND SUNDAY MAKING YOU THIS GREAT... 99 00:06:08,667 --> 00:06:13,291 "JANEY, I’VE BEEN DESPERATELY TRYING TO TELL YOU THAT I’M... 100 00:06:13,291 --> 00:06:18,000 MADLY IN LOVE WITH YOU"... MIX TAPE FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY. 101 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:21,458 A MIX TAPE ? OH, THAT’S SO SWEET, RICKY. 102 00:06:22,875 --> 00:06:24,417 SEE YOU IN ENGLISH. 103 00:06:27,250 --> 00:06:30,041 [ Affected Asian Accent ] CATCH YOU GUY LATER. 104 00:06:32,583 --> 00:06:34,583 WHAT HAPPENIN’ ? 105 00:06:34,583 --> 00:06:36,583 DAMN, SHORTY. 106 00:06:36,583 --> 00:06:39,208 DAWG IS PRETENDIN’ TO BE ASIAN AND SHIT. 107 00:06:39,208 --> 00:06:43,625 THAT CRACKER IS WHITE. CAN’T HE SEE DAT, YO ? 108 00:06:43,625 --> 00:06:46,583 SO, DID YOU GUYS GET ANY ACTION THIS WEEKEND ? 109 00:06:46,583 --> 00:06:48,208 I-I VISIT GRANDFATHER. 110 00:06:48,208 --> 00:06:50,417 I PLAYED TETHERBALL WITH MY SISTERS. 111 00:06:50,417 --> 00:06:52,500 JESUS, WE’RE PATHETIC ! 112 00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:55,500 HOW ARE WE EVER GONNA LOSE OUR VIRGINITY BY GRADUATION ? 113 00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:58,709 UH, MITCH, WE’RE FRESHMEN. WHAT’S WITH THE ATTITUDE ? 114 00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,709 IT NOT EASY TO GET LUCKY HERE. 115 00:07:00,709 --> 00:07:04,875 GIRLS ARE SENSITIVE, MAN. THEY’RE NOT LOOKING FOR SEX. 116 00:07:04,875 --> 00:07:06,792 THEY’RE LOOKING FOR LOVE. 117 00:07:06,792 --> 00:07:09,500 [ Girl Moans ] LOVE ME ! OHH ! HARDER ! 118 00:07:16,375 --> 00:07:18,000 AMANDA BECKER. 119 00:07:19,583 --> 00:07:22,250 [ Mitch ] SHE IS SO PERFECT. 120 00:07:32,458 --> 00:07:34,542 KEEP DREAMING. 121 00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:36,917 WHAT’S UP, REGGIE RAY ? 122 00:07:36,917 --> 00:07:40,000 MAN, I CANNOT WAIT TILL FRIDAY NIGHT’S GAME, Y’ALL. 123 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:44,333 WHAT ABOUT YOUR HEAD ? DOCTOR SAID YOU HAD A BLOOD CLOT THE SIZE OF A GRAPEFRUIT. 124 00:07:44,333 --> 00:07:48,333 FIVE MORE CONCUSSIONS, AND YOU’LL DIE. YOU SHOULD TAKE IT EASY. 125 00:07:48,333 --> 00:07:50,709 DON’T LISTEN TO HIM, REGGIE RAY. 126 00:07:50,709 --> 00:07:52,709 AUSTIN. 127 00:07:52,709 --> 00:07:55,208 MR. NOT FIRST STRING ANYMORE... [ Groans ] 128 00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:58,959 ISN’T FIRST STRING ANYMORE. [ Chuckling ] 129 00:07:58,959 --> 00:08:01,875 BESIDES, WE ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THE LAST TIME JAKE HERE WAS CALLING THE PLAYS. 130 00:08:01,875 --> 00:08:04,458 [ P.A. Announcer ] AND NOW NUMBER FOUR, [ Crowd Cheering ] 131 00:08:04,458 --> 00:08:08,834 OUR HOMETOWN HERO, FIRST-STRING QUARTERBACK JAKE WYLER ! 132 00:08:08,834 --> 00:08:12,333 HEY, MALIK, WOULD YOU HOLD THESE BOOKS HERE FOR A MINUTE ? 133 00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:15,500 SURE. WHY NOT ? I AM THE TOKEN BLACK GUY. 134 00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:19,083 I’M JUST SUPPOSED TO SMILE, STAY OUT OF THE CONVERSATION AND SAY THINGS LIKE... 135 00:08:19,083 --> 00:08:21,083 "DAMN ! SHIT !"... 136 00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:22,875 AND "THAT IS WHACK !" 137 00:08:24,125 --> 00:08:26,375 [ Groans ] 138 00:08:40,333 --> 00:08:44,333 [ Austin ] WHAT’S SHE DOIN’ HERE ? SHE GRADUATED FOUR YEARS AGO. 139 00:08:44,333 --> 00:08:45,875 [ Squeaks ] 140 00:08:45,875 --> 00:08:47,667 - HI, JAKE. - CATHERINE. 141 00:08:47,667 --> 00:08:49,834 CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION ? 142 00:08:49,834 --> 00:08:53,458 WHY IS IT EVERY TIME I TELL A GUY THEY CAN PUT IT WHEREVER THEY WANT, 143 00:08:53,458 --> 00:08:55,667 THEY ALWAYS STICK IT IN MY ASS ? 144 00:08:55,667 --> 00:08:58,917 - DAMN ! - THAT’S JUST WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION FOR ME, CATHERINE. 145 00:08:58,917 --> 00:09:01,583 OH, NO. JAKE. 146 00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:04,709 WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION WOULD BE TELLING YOU THAT AFTER THEY’RE DONE... 147 00:09:04,709 --> 00:09:06,709 I ALWAYS TAKE A HUGE DUMP. 148 00:09:06,709 --> 00:09:08,834 - SHIT ! - OH ! 149 00:09:08,834 --> 00:09:11,750 [ Moans ] ON THEIR CHEST. 150 00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:14,542 OH, THAT IS WHACK ! 151 00:09:14,542 --> 00:09:19,750 ♪ AI-HOO, AI-HOO AI-HOO, AI-HOO ♪ 152 00:09:19,750 --> 00:09:24,500 ♪ AI-HOO, AI-HOO AI-HOO, AI-HOO ♪ 153 00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:29,375 ♪ AI-HOO, AI-HOO AI-HOO, AI-HOO ♪♪ 154 00:09:29,375 --> 00:09:32,041 PRISCILLA. THERE YOU ARE. 155 00:09:32,041 --> 00:09:34,208 JAKE, I NEED SOME T-TO-THE-FOURTH-POWER-Y. 156 00:09:35,709 --> 00:09:39,000 - HUH ? - SOME TIME TO TALK TO YOU. 157 00:09:40,959 --> 00:09:43,417 - OH. - GOD ! 158 00:09:44,875 --> 00:09:47,166 IT MADE SENSE TO ME, PRISCILLA. 159 00:09:47,166 --> 00:09:49,041 [ Clears Throat ] 160 00:09:49,041 --> 00:09:50,667 [ Squeaks ] 161 00:09:50,667 --> 00:09:53,250 YOU’RE LEAVING ME FOR THIS GUY ? 162 00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:56,917 I’M SORRY, JAKE, BUT WE MET OVER SPRING BREAK. 163 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,417 I’M NOT ORDINARY. 164 00:10:02,417 --> 00:10:05,792 YOU’RE LEAVING ME FOR THIS GUY ? 165 00:10:05,792 --> 00:10:07,917 HIS NAME IS LES, 166 00:10:07,917 --> 00:10:11,542 AND HE’S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I’VE EVER SEEN. 167 00:10:11,542 --> 00:10:13,250 [ Clears Throat ] 168 00:10:14,667 --> 00:10:16,291 AND SO IS HIS BAG. 169 00:10:19,375 --> 00:10:21,375 ♪♪ [ Power Pop ] 170 00:10:21,375 --> 00:10:31,083 ♪♪ 171 00:10:31,083 --> 00:10:34,750 ♪ THAT GIRL THINKS SHE’S THE QUEEN OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD ♪ 172 00:10:34,750 --> 00:10:38,542 - ♪ SHE’S GOT THE HOTTEST GUY IN TOWN ♪ - [ Growling ] 173 00:10:38,542 --> 00:10:42,041 ♪ THAT GIRL, SHE HOLDS HER HEAD UP SO HIGH ♪ 174 00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:45,375 ♪ I THINK I WANNA BE HER BEST FRIEND, YEAH ♪ 175 00:10:45,375 --> 00:10:48,166 ♪ REBEL GIRL REBEL GIRL ♪ 176 00:10:48,166 --> 00:10:51,709 ♪ YOU’RE THE QUEEN OF MY WORLD ♪ [ Woman On P.A. ] JANEY BRIGGS, PLEASE REPORT TO THE OFFICE. 177 00:10:51,709 --> 00:10:54,792 ♪ REBEL GIRL, REBEL GIRL ♪♪ 178 00:10:54,792 --> 00:10:57,959 I KNOW THAT BEING A FOREIGN EXCHANGE STUDENT CAN BE A LITTLE SCARY, 179 00:10:57,959 --> 00:11:00,834 ADJUSTING TO A NEW SCHOOL AND A NEW COUNTRY, 180 00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:04,834 BUT I THINK YOU’RE GOING TO FIND THAT THE STUDENTS HERE ARE VERY ACCEPTING OF WHO YOU ARE. 181 00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:06,959 [ European Accent ] 182 00:11:06,959 --> 00:11:09,375 WELL, YOU CERTAINLY HAVE A SUNNY DISPOSITION. 183 00:11:10,834 --> 00:11:12,834 YOU’VE GOT YOUR CLASS SCHEDULE ? 184 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:23,750 WELL, ISN’T THAT WONDERFUL. 185 00:11:24,959 --> 00:11:27,458 OH, JANEY, COME IN. 186 00:11:27,458 --> 00:11:30,208 JANEY, THIS IS AREOLA, OUR NEW FOREIGN EXCHANGE STUDENT. 187 00:11:30,208 --> 00:11:32,875 AREOLA, THIS IS JANEY. SHE IS GONNA SHOW YOU TO YOUR FIRST CLASS. 188 00:11:34,250 --> 00:11:36,041 HI. [ Chuckles ] 189 00:11:41,208 --> 00:11:43,000 I LIKE YOUR BACKPACK. 190 00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:51,875 HEY, DUDE, I HEARD THERE’S SOME UNDERCOVER REPORTER... 191 00:11:51,875 --> 00:11:53,875 POSING AS A HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT. 192 00:11:53,875 --> 00:11:56,125 DUDE, NO WAY, DUDE ! 193 00:11:56,125 --> 00:11:59,792 UH, DO EITHER OF YOU KNOW WHERE MR. KELLER’S ENGLISH CLASS IS ? 194 00:11:59,792 --> 00:12:01,875 DOWN THE HALL ON YOUR LEFT. 195 00:12:01,875 --> 00:12:03,875 SWEET, DUDE. 196 00:12:03,875 --> 00:12:06,875 [ Austin ] FOR THE THOUSANDTH TIME I SAID, "SWALLOW THAT THING !" 197 00:12:06,875 --> 00:12:08,917 [ All Laughing ] RIGHT ? 198 00:12:08,917 --> 00:12:10,375 OH. 199 00:12:13,667 --> 00:12:17,542 HOW COULD PRISCILLA DUMP ME, JAKE WYLER ? 200 00:12:17,542 --> 00:12:20,542 I MEAN, WHO THE HELL DOES SHE THINK SHE IS ? 201 00:12:20,542 --> 00:12:24,750 I GOT TWO WORDS FOR YOU, JAKE: PROM QUEEN... MATERIAL. 202 00:12:26,291 --> 00:12:28,959 AUSTIN, SHE’S AN ILLUSION. OKAY ? 203 00:12:28,959 --> 00:12:32,583 YOU TAKE AWAY THE MAKEUP, THE CLOTHES, 204 00:12:32,583 --> 00:12:36,000 THE WAY SHE WEARS HER HAIR, THE SMELL OF HER PERFUME, 205 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:39,959 THAT CUTE LITTLE FACE SHE MAKES WHEN SHE’S TONGUING MY BALLS. 206 00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:42,083 [ Both Sigh ] 207 00:12:42,083 --> 00:12:44,709 LOOK, SHE’S TOTALLY REPLACEABLE, OKAY ? 208 00:12:44,709 --> 00:12:48,083 GIVEN THE RIGHT LOOK AND THE RIGHT BOYFRIEND, 209 00:12:48,083 --> 00:12:50,291 ANY GIRL CAN BE THIS YEAR’S PROM QUEEN. 210 00:12:50,291 --> 00:12:52,125 I SMELL A BET. 211 00:12:52,125 --> 00:12:56,291 OKAY, JAKEY-JAKEY, ’BOUT TO MAKE A BIG MISTAKEY-- 212 00:12:56,291 --> 00:12:58,291 HERE’S THE WAGER. 213 00:12:58,291 --> 00:13:00,667 I’M GONNA PICK THE MOST HOPELESS GIRL AT THIS SCHOOL, 214 00:13:00,667 --> 00:13:03,750 AND I’M GONNA BET THAT YOU CAN’T TURN HER INTO PROM QUEEN. 215 00:13:03,750 --> 00:13:06,333 YOU’RE ON, AUSTIN. OOH. 216 00:13:06,333 --> 00:13:08,500 AND I’LL BET YOU THAT YOU LOSE THAT BET, 217 00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:11,834 BUT IN DOING SO YOU’LL LEARN A MUCH MORE VALUABLE LESSON AND WIN. 218 00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,792 IN LIFE, THAT IS. 219 00:13:13,792 --> 00:13:16,291 HUH. YOU’RE BOTH ON. HMM. 220 00:13:16,291 --> 00:13:20,667 ALL RIGHT, WELL, LET’S FIND YOU A PROM QUEEN, 221 00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:23,333 MR. LET’S FIND ME A PROM QUEEN. 222 00:13:23,333 --> 00:13:25,291 WHAT ABOUT HER ? [ Moans ] 223 00:13:25,291 --> 00:13:27,709 SO BABY’S GOT A LITTLE BACK. HUNCH, THAT IS. 224 00:13:27,709 --> 00:13:30,917 NAH, WAY TOO EASY. OKAY. 225 00:13:30,917 --> 00:13:33,291 ♪ I HAVE NO PIGMENT ♪ 226 00:13:33,291 --> 00:13:35,166 ANY GIRL WITH A GUITAR IS HOT. 227 00:13:35,166 --> 00:13:37,000 ♪ I NEED SUNSCREEN ♪♪ 228 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,417 GRANTED, SHE’S A HIPPIE ALBINO. SHE COULD STILL BE PROM QUEEN. 229 00:13:40,417 --> 00:13:42,750 OKAY, UH, WHAT ABOUT THE FRATELLI SISTERS ? 230 00:13:42,750 --> 00:13:45,583 [ Austin ] THEY’RE SLIGHTLY DISFIGURED AND CONNECTED AT THE HEAD. 231 00:13:45,583 --> 00:13:47,625 HI, JAKE. HI, JAKE. 232 00:13:47,625 --> 00:13:50,625 BUT COMBINED, THOSE TWO MAKE UP ONE PRETTY DECENT CHICK. 233 00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:53,000 YEAH, I’D DO HER. I KNOW YOU WOULD, REGGIE RAY. 234 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:56,208 BUT NO, I’M LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY WHO’S REALLY MESSED UP. 235 00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:59,291 I’M TALKING ABOUT A REAL SHIT BOMB. 236 00:14:02,166 --> 00:14:04,500 OH. WELL. 237 00:14:04,500 --> 00:14:07,083 [ Austin ] BOMBS AWAY ! 238 00:14:07,083 --> 00:14:09,041 OHH ! [ Imitates Explosion ] 239 00:14:09,041 --> 00:14:12,208 NO, NO, NO, ANYONE BUT HER ! NOT JANEY BRIGGS ! 240 00:14:12,208 --> 00:14:16,041 GUYS, SHE’S GOT GLASSES AND A PONYTAIL ! 241 00:14:16,041 --> 00:14:19,041 OH, LOOK AT THAT. SHE’S GOT PAINT ON HER OVERALLS. 242 00:14:19,041 --> 00:14:21,917 GUYS, THERE’S NO WAY SHE COULD BE PROM QUEEN. 243 00:14:23,041 --> 00:14:24,917 DAMN, THAT SHIT’S WHACK. 244 00:14:26,709 --> 00:14:28,750 [ Boy ] AIM FOR THE HEAD ! 245 00:14:28,750 --> 00:14:30,917 [ Girl ] MAKE IT BLEED ! [ All Shouting ] 246 00:14:42,875 --> 00:14:45,959 CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT THEY’RE DOING IN THERE ? 247 00:14:45,959 --> 00:14:47,959 HORRY COW ! 248 00:14:47,959 --> 00:14:51,125 GUYS-- OHH ! GET YOUR HEADS OUT OF THE GUTTER. 249 00:14:51,125 --> 00:14:53,125 IT’S JUST A GIRL’S LOCKER ROOM. 250 00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:56,125 I’M SURE IT’S NO SEXIER IN THERE THAN IT IS IN HERE. 251 00:14:56,125 --> 00:14:59,917 [ Girl ] HEY, MOLLY, CAN YOU HELP ME TAKE OFF MY PANTIES ? 252 00:14:59,917 --> 00:15:03,375 [ Molly ] HOLD ON, KRISTI. I’VE GOT LOTION ALL OVER MY HANDS. 253 00:15:03,375 --> 00:15:06,125 [ Kristi ] THAT’S OKAY. YOU CAN JUST USE YOUR MOUTH. 254 00:15:14,709 --> 00:15:16,417 THANK YOU, MISS PETERS. 255 00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:19,417 SO, WHO ELSE WOULD LIKE TO SHARE THEIR POEM... 256 00:15:19,417 --> 00:15:22,250 WITH THE REST OF THE CLASS ? 257 00:15:22,250 --> 00:15:24,166 [ Stammering ] 258 00:15:24,166 --> 00:15:27,000 MR. KELLER. OVER HERE. RIGHT HERE. OVER HERE. RIGHT HERE. 259 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:28,917 PLEASE. ANYONE ? 260 00:15:28,917 --> 00:15:31,291 MR. KELLER, PLEASE PICK ME. I’M THE ONE. 261 00:15:31,291 --> 00:15:34,250 YES... RICKY. 262 00:15:38,875 --> 00:15:42,750 [ Clearing Throat, Sniffs ] 263 00:15:42,750 --> 00:15:47,750 "TEN THINGS I LOVE ABOUT JANEY," BY RICKY LIPMAN. [ Boy ] OH, NOT AGAIN ! 264 00:15:49,792 --> 00:15:54,041 "I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY TALKS. I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY WALKS . 265 00:15:54,041 --> 00:15:56,583 "I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY DRINKS. 266 00:15:56,583 --> 00:15:59,041 "I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY BLINKS. 267 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:02,291 "I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY SAYS HI. 268 00:16:02,291 --> 00:16:05,083 "I LOVE IT WHEN JANEY SAYS, ’SEE YA IN ENGLISH !’ 269 00:16:09,208 --> 00:16:12,041 "I LOVE FOLLOWING JANEY TO THE MALL. 270 00:16:15,834 --> 00:16:18,166 "AND I LOVE... 271 00:16:18,166 --> 00:16:22,792 "COLLECTING STRANDS OF JANEY’S HAIR AND... 272 00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:25,792 "ROLLING THEM UP INTO LITTLE JANEY... 273 00:16:25,792 --> 00:16:28,250 "H-H-HAIRBALLS... 274 00:16:28,250 --> 00:16:30,417 WITH--" 275 00:16:30,417 --> 00:16:33,041 [ Sobbing, Whimpering ] 276 00:16:35,208 --> 00:16:37,625 [ Continues Whimpering ] 277 00:16:39,625 --> 00:16:42,625 THANK YOU, RICKY, 278 00:16:42,625 --> 00:16:44,917 FOR THAT INTERESTING POEM. 279 00:16:44,917 --> 00:16:47,041 [ Girls Giggling ] 280 00:16:47,041 --> 00:16:50,417 I’M NOT SURE WE SHOULD BE DOING THIS. QUIET. I THINK I HEAR ’EM. 281 00:16:50,417 --> 00:16:54,041 [ Kristi ] I CAN’T BELIEVE WE JUST DID ALL THAT STUFF TO EACH OTHER, MOLLY. 282 00:16:54,041 --> 00:16:57,291 [ Molly ] IT WAS A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME KIND OF EXPERIENCE, KRISTI, 283 00:16:57,291 --> 00:16:59,291 THAT WILL NEVER, EVER HAPPEN AGAIN. 284 00:16:59,291 --> 00:17:02,917 [ Mitch ] SHIT, WE MISSED IT. LET’S KEEP GOING. 285 00:17:02,917 --> 00:17:06,000 HEY, I FOUND A BUFFALO NICKEL ! 286 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:09,000 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 287 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:11,792 HMM. [ Giggling ] 288 00:17:11,792 --> 00:17:13,458 JACKPOT ! 289 00:17:13,458 --> 00:17:17,041 MITCH, GIRL GO PEE-PEE NOT SOMETHING I WANT TO SEE-SEE. 290 00:17:17,041 --> 00:17:21,083 - I AGREE-GREE. - WOULD YOU TWO PLEASE TRY AND BE A LITTLE OPEN-MINDED ? 291 00:17:22,417 --> 00:17:25,208 CLASS, LET’S OPEN OUR BOOKS... 292 00:17:25,208 --> 00:17:28,333 AND CONTINUE WITH OUR POETRY LESSON. 293 00:17:28,333 --> 00:17:31,875 [ Boy ] KNOW WHAT I THINK ABOUT POETRY? [ Blows Raspberry ] 294 00:17:33,667 --> 00:17:37,291 OH, WAS-- WAS THAT AMUSING ? [ Chuckles ] 295 00:17:37,291 --> 00:17:41,041 IS THAT WHAT YOUR GENERATION CONSIDERS... HUMOR ? 296 00:17:41,041 --> 00:17:43,458 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 297 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:51,959 [ Urinating ] THIS MAKE ME KIND OF HAPPY IN PANTS. 298 00:17:53,166 --> 00:17:55,000 [ Farts ] MMM ! 299 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,750 [ Juicy Flatulence Continues ] 300 00:17:57,750 --> 00:18:01,250 - GOODNESS ! - THAT MAKE ME KIND OF SAD IN PANTS. 301 00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:03,375 [ Flatulence Continues ] [ Gags ] BLEAAH ! 302 00:18:03,375 --> 00:18:05,917 SHAKESPEARE. MOLIERE. 303 00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:09,250 OSCAR WILDE. 304 00:18:09,250 --> 00:18:11,291 THESE WERE HUMORISTS. 305 00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:13,500 [ Diarrheic Farting ] [ Groaning ] 306 00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:15,250 I THINK I’M GONNA BE SICK. 307 00:18:15,250 --> 00:18:17,291 THE SUBLIME, POETIC GENIUS... 308 00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:20,083 OF A CLEVER TURN OF PHRASE. 309 00:18:20,083 --> 00:18:22,041 THAT IS TRUE COMEDY. 310 00:18:22,041 --> 00:18:24,208 [ Flatulence Continues ] OH ! HEAVENS TO BETSY. 311 00:18:24,208 --> 00:18:26,166 - OHH. - [ Creaks ] 312 00:18:26,166 --> 00:18:31,834 YOUR MODERN-DAY, MORONIC, FEEBLE-MINDED, SOPHOMORIC EXCUSE FOR WIT... 313 00:18:31,834 --> 00:18:34,333 - [ Flatulence Continues ] - [ Gagging, Groaning ] 314 00:18:34,333 --> 00:18:37,375 IS MERELY A PARADE OF NASTY, 315 00:18:37,375 --> 00:18:39,542 - OHH ! - FILTHY, VULGAR... 316 00:18:39,542 --> 00:18:41,625 [ All Screaming ] 317 00:18:41,625 --> 00:18:43,500 HUMAN EXCREMENT ! 318 00:18:47,834 --> 00:18:49,834 [ Groaning, Yelling ] 319 00:18:53,083 --> 00:18:55,583 [ Groaning, Coughing ] 320 00:18:55,583 --> 00:18:57,542 [ Farts ] 321 00:18:57,542 --> 00:18:59,750 EXCUSE ME. OHH ! 322 00:19:12,333 --> 00:19:15,542 HEY, JANEY. WHAT’S UP ? EXCUSE ME ? 323 00:19:15,542 --> 00:19:19,542 LISTEN, YOU EVER WONDER WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO BE THE MOST POPULAR GIRL IN SCHOOL ? 324 00:19:19,542 --> 00:19:21,500 YOU MEAN ANOREXIC, SUPERFICIAL, A BITCH, 325 00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,917 A WHORE WHO LACKS ANY REAL LONG-TERM GOALS ? 326 00:19:25,333 --> 00:19:27,333 EXACTLY. 327 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:30,625 SO, IF YOU’RE INTERESTED I THOUGHT MAYBE WE COULD GO OUT SOME TIME, 328 00:19:30,625 --> 00:19:32,667 BE SEEN IN PUBLIC TOGETHER. 329 00:19:32,667 --> 00:19:35,208 YOU HAVEN’T SPOKEN TO ME IN FOUR YEARS, JAKE. 330 00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:37,500 ACTUALLY, IT’S MORE LIKE SIX. 331 00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:40,583 THE TIME YOU’RE REFERRING TO, WHEN WE WERE STANDING IN LINE IN THAT MOVIE THEATER, 332 00:19:40,583 --> 00:19:43,500 I WAS ACTUALLY SAYING "HEY" TO THE PERSON RIGHT BEHIND YOU. 333 00:19:51,125 --> 00:19:53,083 OKAY, WE’RE DOWN A CHEERLEADER... 334 00:19:53,083 --> 00:19:56,166 FOR FRIDAY NIGHT’S STATE CHAMPIONSHIP GAME AGAINST NORTH COMPTON, 335 00:19:56,166 --> 00:19:58,792 AND THAT SQUAD ALWAYS TRIES TO BRING IT. 336 00:19:58,792 --> 00:20:01,333 BRING WHAT, PRISCILLA ? BRING IT. 337 00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:04,000 RIGHT, BUT WHAT IS "IT" ? 338 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:06,583 IT’S JUST WHAT THEY BRING. OKAY ? 339 00:20:18,834 --> 00:20:20,959 NEW GIRL. 340 00:20:20,959 --> 00:20:23,000 HI, I’M SANDY SUE, 341 00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:26,750 AND I JUST WANNA SAY THAT IT IS SIMPLY SWELL TO MEET ALL OF YOU. 342 00:20:26,750 --> 00:20:29,917 PEACHY. I ASSUME YOU BROUGHT A ROUTINE. 343 00:20:29,917 --> 00:20:32,458 OH, YOU BETCHA. 344 00:20:32,458 --> 00:20:36,125 GIVE ME AN "H," GIVE ME A "U," GIVE ME A-- 345 00:20:36,125 --> 00:20:39,000 GIANT PUSSY LICKING ASS FUCKER COCK SHIT ! 346 00:20:43,417 --> 00:20:46,417 I’M SORRY. UM, THAT WAS MY TOURETTE’S. 347 00:20:48,083 --> 00:20:50,250 [ Mutters ] I DON’T KNOW ABOUT HER. 348 00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:53,083 OKAY, LET’S GET ONE THING STRAIGHT. 349 00:20:53,083 --> 00:20:55,250 THIS IS NOT A "CHEER-OCRACY." 350 00:20:55,250 --> 00:20:58,709 I AM THE "CHEER-TATOR," I MAKE THE "CHEER-CISIONS" AROUND HERE, 351 00:20:58,709 --> 00:21:01,083 AND I WILL DEAL WITH THE "CHEER-ONSEQUENCES." 352 00:21:01,083 --> 00:21:06,000 NOW, IF THERE ARE NO MORE "CHEER-UPTIONS," WE CAN "CHEER-TINUE." 353 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,250 [ Whispers ] THANK YOU. 354 00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:14,792 GRANDPA STUCK HIS FINGER UP MY ASS ! COME-FACE ! [ Grunts ] 355 00:21:16,500 --> 00:21:19,709 SHE’LL "CHEER-DO." OKAY. 356 00:21:19,709 --> 00:21:22,083 - [ Whistle Blows ] - [ Coach ] GODDAMN IT, LET’S GO NOW ! 357 00:21:22,083 --> 00:21:24,041 THIRTY-TWO CRAWL ! 358 00:21:24,041 --> 00:21:26,625 GODDAMN IT, LET’S SHOW SOME GODDAMN HUSTLE ! 359 00:21:26,625 --> 00:21:29,250 [ Boy ] LET’S GO ! [ Coach ] LOOK ALIVE OUT THERE ! 360 00:21:29,250 --> 00:21:31,625 THIS ISN’T A GODDAMN TRYOUT, YOU KNOW, GODDAMN IT ! 361 00:21:31,625 --> 00:21:34,250 BLUE 21 ! BLUE 21 ! HUT ! 362 00:21:34,250 --> 00:21:38,417 WHAT THE HELL’S GOING ON ? GODDAMN IT, NOBODY’S COVERING THAT HOLE OUT THERE ! 363 00:21:38,417 --> 00:21:41,458 GODDAMN IT, LET’S DO IT AGAIN ! COME ON ! 364 00:21:41,458 --> 00:21:45,959 [ Crowd Cheering, Chanting ] MARTY ! MARTY ! MARTY ! 365 00:21:45,959 --> 00:21:47,959 ALL RIGHT, MARTY ! HUH ? 366 00:21:47,959 --> 00:21:49,959 [ Grunting ] 367 00:21:49,959 --> 00:21:52,500 GET YOUR STUMPY LITTLE ASS IN THERE. 368 00:21:52,500 --> 00:21:54,542 ARE YOU SURE, COACH ? JUST GO, GODDAMN IT ! 369 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,500 WYLER, WE GOT THIS GODDAMN GAME WRAPPED UP. 370 00:21:58,500 --> 00:22:01,500 ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS RUN OUT THE CLOCK. 371 00:22:01,500 --> 00:22:04,500 [ Crowd Continues Chanting ] MARTY ! MARTY ! MARTY ! 372 00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:08,375 AND FOR GOD’S SAKE, DON’T TRY ANYTHING FANCY, GODDAMN IT ! 373 00:22:11,667 --> 00:22:15,291 ALL RIGHT, LISTEN TO ME, BOYS. WE GOT TIME FOR ONE MORE PLAY. 374 00:22:15,291 --> 00:22:17,083 [ Chuckling ] 375 00:22:17,083 --> 00:22:18,959 - I SAY WE GIVE THE BALL TO MARTY. - HUH ? 376 00:22:18,959 --> 00:22:20,750 - DAMN ! - THAT’S OKAY. 377 00:22:20,750 --> 00:22:23,000 I’M JUST HAPPY BEING ON THE FIELD. 378 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:26,041 BUT, JAKE, COACH RECKONED WE OUGHTA JUST TAKE A KNEE. WE’RE UP 42-NOTHIN’. 379 00:22:27,542 --> 00:22:30,792 WELL, I DON’T CARE WHAT COACH "RECKONS." 380 00:22:30,792 --> 00:22:36,375 YOU CAN’T GO THROUGH LIFE BEING SCARED, MARTY, ’CAUSE IF YOU DO YOU’LL ALWAYS WONDER, WHAT IF ? 381 00:22:36,375 --> 00:22:42,083 BUT IF YOU GO OUT THERE AND YOU GIVE IT YOUR ALL, THAT’S HEROIC. 382 00:22:44,959 --> 00:22:47,375 REALLY, GUYS, I APPRECIATE THIS, BUT-- 383 00:22:47,375 --> 00:22:49,875 THAT’S THE SPIRIT ! READY ? [ All ] HUT ! 384 00:22:49,875 --> 00:22:52,250 [ Crowd Cheering ] 385 00:22:54,458 --> 00:22:57,583 HEY, WHAT YOU DOIN’, MAN ? GET OUTTA HERE ! 386 00:22:57,583 --> 00:22:59,583 NOT HERE, MARTY. DOWN THERE. 387 00:22:59,583 --> 00:23:01,583 RIGHT HERE, RIGHT ? 388 00:23:01,583 --> 00:23:03,542 SCREW, MAN ! OVER HERE ! 389 00:23:03,542 --> 00:23:04,917 OVER HERE ? 390 00:23:06,792 --> 00:23:09,542 - [ Girl ] WE LOVE YOU, MARTY ! - SET ! HUT ! 391 00:23:09,542 --> 00:23:12,375 ♪ I DON’T WANNA BE A LOSER ♪ 392 00:23:12,375 --> 00:23:17,750 ♪ NO, I DON’T WANNA BE AN ALMOST-WAS ♪ 393 00:23:17,750 --> 00:23:20,458 ♪ I DON’T WANNA BE A WHITE TRASH WORKING-CLASS CHUMP ♪ 394 00:23:20,458 --> 00:23:23,333 - NO ! NO ! - ♪ I DON’T WANNA BE A LOSER ANYMORE ♪ 395 00:23:23,333 --> 00:23:26,208 - NO, DON’T THROW IT TO ME ! - ♪ I WANNA BE A ROCK STAR ♪♪ 396 00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:33,542 NO ! 397 00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:39,917 [ Groans, Gasps ] 398 00:23:42,792 --> 00:23:44,625 YES ! GO ! 399 00:23:46,291 --> 00:23:49,500 [ Gasps ] [ Crowd Gasping, Murmuring ] 400 00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:51,709 OW ! [ Gasping, Murmuring Continue ] 401 00:23:53,542 --> 00:23:55,709 [ Boy ] NICE HANDS, MARTY ! 402 00:23:55,709 --> 00:23:57,709 I DID IT ! [ Whistle Blows ] 403 00:23:57,709 --> 00:24:00,166 I’M A HERO ! WALK IT OFF, MARTY ! 404 00:24:00,166 --> 00:24:02,375 [ Whistle Blows ] ALL RIGHT, GODDAMN IT ! 405 00:24:02,375 --> 00:24:05,000 LET’S HIT THE SHOWERS, GODDAMN IT ! 406 00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,041 [ Shouting, Talking ] YOU BUNCH OF CANDY-ASSES ! 407 00:24:07,041 --> 00:24:11,291 THAT WAS A LOUSY PRACTICE ! WE’RE GONNA GET OUR ASSES KICKED FRIDAY ! 408 00:24:11,291 --> 00:24:13,291 COACH, WHAT ABOUT FOURTH STRING ? 409 00:24:13,291 --> 00:24:15,291 I DIDN’T EVEN GET TO PRACTICE. 410 00:24:15,291 --> 00:24:19,083 WYLER, AFTER ALL THE GODDAMN SHENANIGANS YOU PULLED LAST SEASON, 411 00:24:19,083 --> 00:24:23,458 YOU SHOULD BE THANKING GOD YOU’RE STILL IN GODDAMN UNIFORM, GODDAMN IT ! 412 00:24:24,917 --> 00:24:26,750 [ Groans, Coughs ] 413 00:24:47,542 --> 00:24:52,458 IF MY PARENTS FIND OUT I GOT DETENTION, THEY’RE NOT GONNA LET ME EAT DESSERT FOR A WEEK. 414 00:24:52,458 --> 00:24:54,709 WE HAVE DISGRACED OURSELVES AND OUR FAMILIES. 415 00:24:54,709 --> 00:24:59,208 GUYS, GUYS, GUYS. I’M SENSING THE MORALE’S A LITTLE LOW HERE. 416 00:24:59,208 --> 00:25:03,417 I SAY WE MAKE A PACT RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. 417 00:25:03,417 --> 00:25:06,792 BEFORE THE END OF THE YEAR, WE ALL GET LAID ! 418 00:25:06,792 --> 00:25:09,333 MITCH, WE ALWAYS MAKE THAT PACT. 419 00:25:09,333 --> 00:25:12,417 BUT WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT SINCE WE HIT PUBERTY. 420 00:25:12,417 --> 00:25:15,959 - THAT WAS TWO AND A HALF WEEKS AGO. - I JUST GOT FIRST HAIR ON BALL. 421 00:25:15,959 --> 00:25:19,125 GUYS, I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I’M SAYING. 422 00:25:19,125 --> 00:25:23,041 I’M TALKING ABOUT BECOMING THE MASTERS OF OUR SEXUAL DESTINY. 423 00:25:23,041 --> 00:25:27,041 NO LONGER WILL OUR PENISES REMAIN FLACCID AND UNUSED. 424 00:25:27,041 --> 00:25:29,750 NO LONGER WE STEAL GRANDFATHER’S PORN ! 425 00:25:29,750 --> 00:25:34,000 YEAH, NO LONGER WILL WE WEAR BLINDFOLDS WHEN WE’RE JERKING EACH OTHER OFF ! 426 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:36,583 [ Man ] ALL RIGHT, THAT’S IT ! 427 00:25:40,041 --> 00:25:42,083 WHAT IN GOD’S NAME’S GOING ON IN HERE ? 428 00:25:42,083 --> 00:25:45,458 WHAT WAS THAT RUCKUS ? I NO HEAR RUCKUS. 429 00:25:45,458 --> 00:25:49,834 - I WAS JUST IN MY OFFICE. I HEARD A RUCKUS. - CAN YOU DESCRIBE THIS RUCKUS ? 430 00:25:49,834 --> 00:25:52,792 OH, YOU’D BETTER WATCH YOUR TONGUE, YOUNG MAN. YOU’D BETTER WATCH IT ! 431 00:25:52,792 --> 00:25:56,291 - WE WERE JUST SITTING HERE LIKE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO. - I DON’T WANNA HEAR IT. 432 00:25:56,291 --> 00:25:58,291 YOU JUST BOUGHT YOURSELF ANOTHER DETENTION. 433 00:25:58,291 --> 00:26:01,208 - BUT THAT’S NOT FAIR. - CRY ME A RIVER, DICK-FACE. 434 00:26:01,208 --> 00:26:04,250 - YOU JUST BOUGHT ANOTHER ONE. - [ Mutters ] EAT MY SHORTS. 435 00:26:04,250 --> 00:26:06,583 WHAT WAS THAT ? 436 00:26:06,583 --> 00:26:09,583 EAT.. MY... SHORTS. 437 00:26:09,583 --> 00:26:12,583 - DON’T MESS WITH THE BULL. YOU’LL GET THE HORNS. - I’M SHAKING. 438 00:26:12,583 --> 00:26:14,417 - YOU JUST GOT ANOTHER. - GOOD. 439 00:26:14,417 --> 00:26:17,250 - YOU THROUGH ? - NOT EVEN CLOSE, BUD. 440 00:26:17,250 --> 00:26:19,583 - YOU WANT ANOTHER ONE ? - YES. 441 00:26:19,583 --> 00:26:21,417 YOU GOT IT ! GOOD. 442 00:26:21,417 --> 00:26:23,625 - THAT’S ANOTHER ONE. YOU HAD ENOUGH YET ? - NO. 443 00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:25,125 - THAT’S ANOTHER ONE. - SO ? 444 00:26:25,125 --> 00:26:27,208 - JUST SAY THE WORD, I’LL KEEP GOING. - GO ! 445 00:26:27,208 --> 00:26:29,625 - EENIE-MEENIE-MINIE-- - MOE ! 446 00:26:29,625 --> 00:26:31,041 - YOUR MOTHER WAS A-- - HO ! 447 00:26:31,041 --> 00:26:32,959 - HE WAS A FAMOUS CLOWN. - BOBO ! 448 00:26:32,959 --> 00:26:35,417 MITCH, CUT IT OUT ! 449 00:26:35,417 --> 00:26:38,333 - [ Mouths Word ] - THAT’S ANOTHER ONE FOR YOU. 450 00:26:38,333 --> 00:26:40,208 BUT I WAS JUST TELLING HIM-- THAT’S ANOTHER ONE. 451 00:26:40,208 --> 00:26:44,083 - SO THAT MAKE ONE MORE FOR OX OR FOR MITCH ? - ANOTHER. 452 00:26:44,083 --> 00:26:47,041 - I CONFUSED. - SHUT YOUR HOLE, WANG CHUNG. 453 00:26:47,041 --> 00:26:51,166 I GOT ALL THREE OF YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR NATURAL-BORN LIVES. YOU’RE MINE. 454 00:26:51,166 --> 00:26:53,667 THE NEXT TIME I COME IN HERE, I’M CRACKIN’ SKULLS. 455 00:26:53,667 --> 00:26:56,083 ♪♪ 456 00:26:56,083 --> 00:26:59,458 ♪ HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY ♪ 457 00:26:59,458 --> 00:27:02,792 ♪ OOOH-OOH-OOH-OOH ♪♪ 458 00:27:09,500 --> 00:27:13,583 [ Sighs ] OH, GOD, DAD. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU ? I’M NOT GOING TO PRINCETON. 459 00:27:13,583 --> 00:27:15,625 LISTEN, I’M NOT PRESSURING YOU, SON. 460 00:27:15,625 --> 00:27:17,792 ALL I’M SAYING IS, GIVE IT FOUR YEARS. 461 00:27:17,792 --> 00:27:21,333 IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, THERE’S ALWAYS A JOB WAITING FOR YOU AT MY FIRM. 462 00:27:21,333 --> 00:27:24,291 I DON’T WANT YOUR LIFE. 463 00:27:24,291 --> 00:27:28,834 THAT’S OKAY, SON. I HEARD ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN YOU AND PRISCILLA. 464 00:27:28,834 --> 00:27:32,542 THE GOOD NEWS IS, I’VE GOT THE PERFECT REBOUND GIRL FOR YOU. 465 00:27:32,542 --> 00:27:35,000 REALLY ? 466 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:38,417 BEVERLY. COULD YOU COME IN HERE ? 467 00:27:44,583 --> 00:27:47,458 - DAD, THAT’S MOM. - WHAT DO YOU SAY, KIDDO ? 468 00:27:49,166 --> 00:27:51,583 I’M JUST GONNA LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE. 469 00:27:54,417 --> 00:27:56,375 MAKE ME PROUD, SON. 470 00:27:56,375 --> 00:27:59,041 [ TV: Man ] SO, YOU IN LOVE ? 471 00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:04,750 - YEAH, I THINK I AM. - WELL, WHO IS THIS GUY ? 472 00:28:04,750 --> 00:28:09,709 HIS NAME IS BLANE. HE’S A SENIOR. HE’S SO BEAUTIFUL. 473 00:28:09,709 --> 00:28:12,291 UM, HE’S A RICHIE. 474 00:28:12,291 --> 00:28:14,375 [ TV: Man ] A WHAT-IE ? 475 00:28:14,375 --> 00:28:17,750 [ TV: Girl ] RICHIE. JANEY ? SWEETHEART ? 476 00:28:19,875 --> 00:28:21,917 [ TV Continues, Faint ] HI, DADDY. 477 00:28:21,917 --> 00:28:25,458 IS SOMETHING WRONG ? YOU WERE AWFULLY QUIET AT DINNER TONIGHT. 478 00:28:25,458 --> 00:28:27,959 DADDY, YOU WERE PASSED OUT ON THE TABLE. 479 00:28:27,959 --> 00:28:30,458 [ Chuckles ] 480 00:28:33,375 --> 00:28:35,875 LISTEN, HONEY, 481 00:28:35,875 --> 00:28:40,375 I MAY NOT ALWAYS BE COHERENT OR CONSCIOUS, 482 00:28:40,375 --> 00:28:43,583 BUT I KNOW WHEN MY LITTLE GIRL’S GOT SOMETHING ON HER MIND. 483 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,542 WELL, THERE IS THIS POPULAR BOY JAKE. 484 00:28:47,542 --> 00:28:51,417 OH, SWEETIE. 485 00:28:53,208 --> 00:28:55,333 JAKE KNOCKED YOU UP, DIDN’T HE ? 486 00:28:55,333 --> 00:28:58,041 NO, HE ASKED ME OUT. 487 00:28:58,041 --> 00:29:00,667 OH. WELL, DO YOU LIKE HIM ? 488 00:29:00,667 --> 00:29:03,000 ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO HIM ? 489 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,041 I MEAN, WOULD YOU GIVE HIM HEAD ? 490 00:29:06,041 --> 00:29:07,875 WELL, HE IS KINDA CUTE, BUT... 491 00:29:09,166 --> 00:29:11,417 HE’S ALWAYS BEEN A TOTAL JERK. 492 00:29:11,417 --> 00:29:14,417 IT’S JUST SO WEIRD THAT HE WOULD START TALKING TO ME NOW. 493 00:29:14,417 --> 00:29:17,375 ESPECIALLY AFTER YOU’VE PACKED ON A COUPLE OF POUNDS. 494 00:29:17,375 --> 00:29:20,375 [ Chuckling ] [ Uncomfortable Chuckle ] 495 00:29:20,375 --> 00:29:24,333 UM, W-WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DO ? 496 00:29:24,333 --> 00:29:26,917 [ Sighs ] LOOK, SWEETIE, 497 00:29:26,917 --> 00:29:31,792 I WOULD NEVER, EVER WANT YOU TO DO ANYTHING THAT COMPROMISES WHO YOU ARE, 498 00:29:31,792 --> 00:29:35,333 BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY, VERY SPECIAL TO ME. 499 00:29:35,333 --> 00:29:39,458 AND IF THIS JAKE CHARACTER IS ONLY ASKING YOU OUT TO GET INTO YOUR PANTS, 500 00:29:39,458 --> 00:29:41,333 WELL, THEN I’D SAY... 501 00:29:41,333 --> 00:29:43,458 GO OUT WITH HIM. 502 00:29:43,458 --> 00:29:47,792 I MEAN, LET’S BE HONEST. YOU COULD CERTAINLY USE THE POPULARITY POINTS. 503 00:29:47,792 --> 00:29:49,959 AND IF JAKE REALLY LIKES YOU, 504 00:29:49,959 --> 00:29:53,834 THEN MAYBE THOSE KIDS’LL QUIT THROWING BAGS OF SHIT ALL OVER THE PORCH. 505 00:29:55,333 --> 00:29:58,250 [ Both Chuckling ] 506 00:30:00,166 --> 00:30:02,375 [ Sighs ] WELL, I FEEL BETTER. 507 00:30:03,959 --> 00:30:06,542 UM, THANKS FOR THE ADVICE, DADDY. 508 00:30:08,250 --> 00:30:11,166 THAT’S WHAT I’M HERE FOR, PUMPKIN TITS. 509 00:30:16,208 --> 00:30:20,375 CATHERINE, I NEED TO ASK YOU A FAVOR. 510 00:30:20,375 --> 00:30:23,750 IT’S ABOUT TIME. NO, NOT THAT. 511 00:30:23,750 --> 00:30:26,208 - [ Grunts ] - [ Cat Yowls ] 512 00:30:26,208 --> 00:30:29,000 LISTEN, YOU’RE THE CRUELEST GIRL IN HIGH SCHOOL. 513 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:32,000 YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN HELP ME TRICK JANEY BRIGGS INTO LIKING ME. 514 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:37,583 WHOA. YOU DON’T MEAN THAT GIRL WITH THE GLASSES AND THE PONYTAIL, DO YOU ? 515 00:30:37,583 --> 00:30:40,000 DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE PAINT-COVERED OVERALLS. 516 00:30:41,625 --> 00:30:43,792 WELL, 517 00:30:43,792 --> 00:30:45,583 IT’S GOING TO BE DIFFICULT, 518 00:30:47,125 --> 00:30:49,792 BUT I THINK I CAN HELP YOU. 519 00:30:49,792 --> 00:30:50,959 SIT. 520 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:55,875 FOR A PRICE. 521 00:30:58,625 --> 00:31:01,417 AND THIS TIME I DON’T WANT YOUR CAR. 522 00:31:03,041 --> 00:31:05,041 I WANT YOU. 523 00:31:05,041 --> 00:31:07,041 OH, CATHERINE, THAT’S DISGUSTING. 524 00:31:07,041 --> 00:31:09,083 [ Moans ] YOU’RE MY SISTER. 525 00:31:09,083 --> 00:31:11,208 ONLY BY BLOOD. OH, GOD ! 526 00:31:11,208 --> 00:31:13,750 WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS FAMILY ? 527 00:31:13,750 --> 00:31:17,667 HEY ! DO YOU WANT... MY HELP... OR NOT ? 528 00:31:26,667 --> 00:31:28,500 [ Grunts ] OKAY. 529 00:31:30,041 --> 00:31:33,041 OKAY, THERE ARE THREE THINGS YOU NEED TO DO... 530 00:31:33,041 --> 00:31:35,834 TO HAVE JANEY EATING OUT OF THE PALM OF YOUR HAND. 531 00:31:35,834 --> 00:31:39,083 [ Students Chattering ] [ Catherine ] FIRST YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO EARN HER TRUST. 532 00:31:39,083 --> 00:31:42,542 - [ Janey ] COME ON, GUYS ! LEAVE HIM ALONE ! - HEY ! 533 00:31:42,542 --> 00:31:45,083 COME ON, BACK OFF ! THAT’S ENOUGH, OKAY ? 534 00:31:45,083 --> 00:31:47,542 [ Onlookers Gasping, Murmuring, Laughing ] 535 00:31:49,500 --> 00:31:51,834 YOU LITTLE SHIT. 536 00:31:51,834 --> 00:31:56,083 - [ Grunting ] - COME ON. NO. 537 00:31:56,083 --> 00:32:00,000 [ Moaning, Whining ] 538 00:32:01,750 --> 00:32:04,667 AND DON’T YOU GUYS MESS WITH HIM AGAIN. 539 00:32:04,667 --> 00:32:06,834 [ Catherine ] ONCE YOU’VE GOT HER TRUST, 540 00:32:06,834 --> 00:32:10,709 [ Amplified Thumping ] IT’S TIME TO MAKE HER FEEL SPECIAL. 541 00:32:10,709 --> 00:32:14,917 PICK A SONG WITH HER NAME IN IT. THAT ALWAYS WORKS. [ Microphone Feedback ] 542 00:32:14,917 --> 00:32:18,959 [ Jake On P.A. ] ♪ MM-DAH-MM-DAH-MMM ♪ 543 00:32:18,959 --> 00:32:22,667 - ♪ MM-DAH-MM-DAH-MMM ♪ - HUH ? 544 00:32:22,667 --> 00:32:25,709 ♪ MM-DAH-MM-DAH-MMM ♪ 545 00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:30,458 ♪ MM-DAH-MM-DAH-MMM ♪ 546 00:32:30,458 --> 00:32:32,750 ♪ MMMMMM ♪ 547 00:32:32,750 --> 00:32:34,750 ♪ JANEY’S GOT A GUN ♪ 548 00:32:36,125 --> 00:32:37,792 ♪ JANEY BRIGGS GOT A GUN ♪ 549 00:32:37,792 --> 00:32:40,583 SHE’S GOT A GUN ! JANEY’S GOT A GUN ! 550 00:32:40,583 --> 00:32:42,750 ♪ JANEY’S COME UNDONE ♪ WHAT ? 551 00:32:42,750 --> 00:32:46,375 - [ All Screaming ] - ♪ JANEY BRIGGS GOT A GUN ♪ 552 00:32:46,375 --> 00:32:50,166 UH-- WHAT ? ♪ SO RUN AWAY RUN AWAY ♪ 553 00:32:50,166 --> 00:32:53,000 - ♪ FROM THE PAIN, YEAH ♪ - TAKE IT EASY, MISS. 554 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,125 NO, WAIT-- HEY, GET BACK HERE ! 555 00:32:55,125 --> 00:32:58,709 ♪ RUN AWAY RUN AWAY FROM THE PAIN ♪♪ 556 00:32:58,709 --> 00:33:02,291 HOLD HER DOWN ! HOLD HER DOWN ! [ Electrical Crackling ] 557 00:33:02,291 --> 00:33:04,709 [ Crackling Continues ] GIVE ME HER HAND ! [ Grunts ] 558 00:33:04,709 --> 00:33:06,917 GIVE US THE GUN, JANEY. JESUS ! 559 00:33:06,917 --> 00:33:09,875 [ Catherine ] AFTER YOU’VE SUCCEEDED IN MAKING HER FEEL SPECIAL, 560 00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:13,959 IT’S TIME TO PUT THE ICING ON THE CAKE. 561 00:33:13,959 --> 00:33:16,959 I’M REALLY GLAD YOU SHOWED UP, JANEY. 562 00:33:16,959 --> 00:33:21,667 LISTEN, JAKE, THE ONLY REASON THAT I CAME HERE WAS TO TELL YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE. 563 00:33:21,667 --> 00:33:24,667 YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST MAKING A SNACK. 564 00:33:24,667 --> 00:33:26,667 YOU WANT ONE ? 565 00:33:26,667 --> 00:33:28,667 NO. 566 00:33:28,667 --> 00:33:31,166 LISTEN, JAKE, I-- I’LL BE RIGHT BACK. 567 00:33:31,166 --> 00:33:33,041 BUT I REA-- 568 00:33:34,709 --> 00:33:36,500 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 569 00:33:38,125 --> 00:33:40,041 [ Sighs ] 570 00:34:08,291 --> 00:34:10,083 HUNGRY ? 571 00:34:12,834 --> 00:34:14,792 I DON’T LIKE SUNDAES. 572 00:34:14,792 --> 00:34:18,291 OH, IT’S NOT A SUNDAE. IT’S A BANANA SPLIT. 573 00:34:20,291 --> 00:34:22,375 I DON’T LIKE THOSE EITHER. 574 00:34:22,375 --> 00:34:24,083 GOOD-BYE, JAKE. 575 00:34:26,208 --> 00:34:29,083 [ Door Opens, Closes ] [ Sighs ] 576 00:34:33,625 --> 00:34:37,458 ♪♪ 577 00:34:37,458 --> 00:34:39,667 ♪ OH, YEAH ♪ 578 00:34:39,667 --> 00:34:42,250 NOW, PRESTON, I LEFT SOME MONEY ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER. 579 00:34:42,250 --> 00:34:45,375 ♪ OH, YEAH ♪♪ AND THE EMERGENCY NUMBERS ARE BY THE PHONE. 580 00:34:45,375 --> 00:34:49,625 - AND REMEMBER, SON, NO PARTIES. - I KNOW, DAD, I KNOW. 581 00:34:49,625 --> 00:34:51,709 KEG’S COMIN’ THROUGH. HEY, PRESTON. 582 00:34:51,709 --> 00:34:53,959 WHAT’S UP, MAN ? 583 00:34:53,959 --> 00:34:58,083 WE’RE TRUSTING YOU, PRESTON. WHERE DO YOU WANT THESE SPEAKERS SET UP, PRESTON ? 584 00:34:58,083 --> 00:35:00,542 JUST MOVE ALL THE SHIT IN THE DINING ROOM. 585 00:35:00,542 --> 00:35:03,542 YOU GUYS REALLY SHOULD HIT THE ROAD, HUH ? 586 00:35:03,542 --> 00:35:06,333 ’CAUSE I’M ABOUT TO TAKE YOUR ANTIQUE FERRARI TO THE INNER CITY TO BUY SOME HOOKERS. 587 00:35:06,333 --> 00:35:08,500 ALL RIGHT. WE’LL CALL LATER. 588 00:35:08,500 --> 00:35:11,291 BY THAT POINT, I’LL BE SO HIGH I WON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE THE PHONE IS. 589 00:35:11,291 --> 00:35:13,250 [ Giggles ] THAT’S MY BOY. 590 00:35:13,250 --> 00:35:14,583 [ Makes Kissing Noise ] 591 00:35:16,875 --> 00:35:19,417 JAKE. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ? 592 00:35:19,417 --> 00:35:22,250 I’M TAKING YOU TO PRESTON WASSERSTEIN’S BIG PARTY. 593 00:35:22,250 --> 00:35:25,959 I CAN’T. I MEAN, I-- I’M NOT DRESSED TO GO TO A PARTY. 594 00:35:25,959 --> 00:35:28,291 LOOK AT ME. I’M A COMPLETE MESS. 595 00:35:28,291 --> 00:35:31,667 I’D SAY YOU’RE ONE BIG FUCKING TRAIN WRECK. 596 00:35:35,709 --> 00:35:37,583 [ Janey ] DO I KNOW YOU ? 597 00:35:38,709 --> 00:35:40,500 HMM. 598 00:35:45,333 --> 00:35:47,333 AAH. 599 00:35:47,333 --> 00:35:49,166 [ Sniffs ] 600 00:35:53,291 --> 00:35:56,250 THAT’S IT. I’VE GOT IT. 601 00:35:56,250 --> 00:35:58,083 WHAT ? 602 00:35:58,083 --> 00:36:01,667 IT MIGHT SEEM CRAZY, BUT YOU’RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO TRUST ME. 603 00:36:30,208 --> 00:36:32,333 THAT’S IT. 604 00:36:32,333 --> 00:36:35,125 I DID IT. I’M A MIRACLE WORKER. 605 00:36:37,750 --> 00:36:41,417 GENTLEMEN, MAY I PRESENT TO YOU... 606 00:36:41,417 --> 00:36:44,917 THE NEW AND IMPROVED JANEY BRIGGS. 607 00:36:44,917 --> 00:36:53,041 ♪♪ 608 00:36:53,041 --> 00:37:05,333 ♪♪ 609 00:37:05,333 --> 00:37:07,375 ♪ KISS ME ♪ 610 00:37:07,375 --> 00:37:10,250 ♪ OUT OF THE BEARDED BARLEY ♪ 611 00:37:10,250 --> 00:37:12,291 ♪ NIGHTLY ♪ 612 00:37:12,291 --> 00:37:15,083 ♪ BESIDE THE GREEN GREEN GRASS ♪ 613 00:37:15,083 --> 00:37:17,333 ♪ SWING, SWING ♪ 614 00:37:17,333 --> 00:37:18,959 ♪ SWING THE SPINNING STEP ♪ 615 00:37:18,959 --> 00:37:21,458 ♪ YOU WEAR THOSE SHOES AND I WILL ♪ 616 00:37:21,458 --> 00:37:24,959 ♪ WEAR THAT DRESS ♪ CONGRATULATIONS. YOU JUST GOT YOUR FIRST SLOW-MOTION ENTRANCE. 617 00:37:24,959 --> 00:37:26,625 ♪ KISS ME ♪ 618 00:37:26,625 --> 00:37:29,250 ♪ BENEATH THE MILKY TWILIGHT ♪ 619 00:37:29,250 --> 00:37:31,625 ♪ LEAD ME ♪ OOPS. 620 00:37:31,625 --> 00:37:33,500 ♪ OUT ON THE MOONLIT FLOOR ♪ 621 00:37:33,500 --> 00:37:36,667 ♪ LIFT YOUR OPEN HAND ♪♪ [ Grunting ] 622 00:37:36,667 --> 00:37:39,125 AAH ! 623 00:37:39,125 --> 00:37:42,667 [ Janey ] AAH ! OOH ! AAH ! 624 00:37:46,625 --> 00:37:48,750 I’M OKAY ! 625 00:37:48,750 --> 00:37:51,000 UH, JANEY ? OW. 626 00:37:52,667 --> 00:37:56,458 COME ON OUTTA THERE, HONEY. QUIT FARTIN’ AROUND. 627 00:38:04,500 --> 00:38:06,500 GOT YOUR MOM’S CAR KEYS ? 628 00:38:06,500 --> 00:38:08,333 CHECK. 629 00:38:09,583 --> 00:38:11,500 SLEEPING BAGS. CHECK. CHECK. 630 00:38:11,500 --> 00:38:13,875 CONDOMS. CHECK. CHECK. 631 00:38:13,875 --> 00:38:17,291 3 PUBESCENT LIBIDOS THAT WILL TAKE US ON A SERIES OF WACKY MISHAPS AND WILD ADVENTURES ? 632 00:38:18,750 --> 00:38:20,542 [ Together ] CHECK ! ROAD TRIP ! 633 00:38:21,792 --> 00:38:27,500 ♪♪ 634 00:38:27,500 --> 00:38:30,208 ♪ I LIKE THE NIGHT LIFE BABY ♪ 635 00:38:31,417 --> 00:38:33,208 ♪ SHE SAYS ♪ 636 00:38:34,917 --> 00:38:37,875 ♪ LET’S GO ♪♪ WE HERE. 637 00:38:37,875 --> 00:38:42,333 GENTLEMEN, TONIGHT WE ARE GOING TO OUR FIRST BIG HIGH SCHOOL PARTY. 638 00:38:42,333 --> 00:38:46,208 NOW, IF THERE IS ANY PLACE TO BUZZ THE BRILLO, THIS IS IT. 639 00:38:46,208 --> 00:38:48,458 HOW YOU PLAN ON BUZZING BRILLO ? 640 00:38:48,458 --> 00:38:50,291 WITH THIS LETTER. 641 00:38:50,291 --> 00:38:53,500 NOW AMANDA BECKER WILL FINALLY KNOW THE TRUTH-- 642 00:38:53,500 --> 00:38:56,417 THAT I HAVE LOVED HER SINCE THE FIRST TIME I SAW HER. 643 00:38:56,417 --> 00:38:59,041 ♪♪ [ Rock ] WELCOME TO THE PARTY, GUYS. 644 00:38:59,041 --> 00:39:02,417 IF YOU’RE GONNA HAVE SEX, PLEASE DO IT IN MY PARENTS’ BEDROOM. 645 00:39:02,417 --> 00:39:04,709 [ All Chattering, Laughing ] 646 00:39:04,709 --> 00:39:07,500 [ Girl # 1 ] DOES THAT GIRL GO TO OUR SCHOOL ? [ Girl #2 ] JANEY BRIGGS ! 647 00:39:07,500 --> 00:39:10,166 IT’S, LIKE, NOT EVEN THE SAME PERSON ! WOW ! 648 00:39:10,166 --> 00:39:14,333 JANEY STAINED OVERALLS ? I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU TALKED ME INTO THIS. 649 00:39:14,333 --> 00:39:16,417 [ Girl #1 ] PRISCILLA MUST BE FREAKING OUT... 650 00:39:16,417 --> 00:39:19,417 NOW THAT JANEY’S LOST HER GLASSES AND PONYTAIL. 651 00:39:19,417 --> 00:39:22,792 WELL, I’M GOING TO GO FUCK A COMPLETE STRANGER. I’LL SEE YOU GUYS LATER. 652 00:39:22,792 --> 00:39:25,583 [ Boy ] HEY, I’M A COMPLETE STRANGER. I’M A COMPLETE STRANGER ! 653 00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:31,750 RELAX, ALL RIGHT ? IT’S GONNA BE OKAY. 654 00:39:31,750 --> 00:39:33,709 [ Boy ] NICE TURTLENECK. 655 00:39:33,709 --> 00:39:35,709 SO, WHAT’S YOUR NAME ? 656 00:39:35,709 --> 00:39:37,709 WHY, I’M SANDY SUE-- 657 00:39:37,709 --> 00:39:40,709 LIMP-DICKED FAG FUCKER ! OKAY, WHO TOLD YOU THAT ? 658 00:39:40,709 --> 00:39:43,709 WAS IT ALISON ? ’CAUSE ALISON WAS REALLY BITTER WHEN WE BROKE UP. 659 00:39:43,709 --> 00:39:45,709 [ Girl #1 ] 100% COMPLETELY FAKE. 660 00:39:45,709 --> 00:39:48,709 [ Girl #2 ] I AGREE. THAT’S NOT HER NATURAL HAIR COLOR. 661 00:39:48,709 --> 00:39:51,333 I CAN’T BELIEVE SHE’S WEARING THE SAME OUTFIT AS ME. 662 00:39:51,333 --> 00:39:53,250 IT LOOKS MUCH BETTER ON YOU. 663 00:39:53,250 --> 00:39:56,208 WHERE IS SHE ? I THOUGHT SHE’D BE HERE BY NOW. 664 00:40:05,375 --> 00:40:08,542 WHAT’S GOING ON ? SHH ! 665 00:40:08,542 --> 00:40:14,375 [ Muttering ] WE CAN’T TALK UNTIL SHE STARTS MOVING AGAIN. 666 00:40:17,959 --> 00:40:20,583 [ Girl ] SHE TOOK FOREVER THIS TIME ! 667 00:40:28,834 --> 00:40:31,625 [ Clears Throat ] WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ? 668 00:40:34,458 --> 00:40:36,458 WHAT DO YOU MEAN ? 669 00:40:36,458 --> 00:40:39,458 WELL, I’M SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONLY BLACK GUY AT THIS PARTY. 670 00:40:39,458 --> 00:40:42,291 OH ! DAMN ! 671 00:40:42,291 --> 00:40:44,291 SHIT. YEAH, I KNOW. 672 00:40:44,291 --> 00:40:46,291 [ Together ] IT’S WHACK. 673 00:40:46,291 --> 00:40:49,291 HEY, MAN, MY BAD. TAKE THIS, MAN. THANKS. 674 00:40:49,291 --> 00:40:51,291 DO YOUR THING. HEY. 675 00:40:51,291 --> 00:40:53,291 PEACE OUT, BROTHER. HEY, HONEST MISTAKE. 676 00:40:53,291 --> 00:40:55,625 I’LL JUST WALK OUT. ALL RIGHT. 677 00:40:55,625 --> 00:40:57,500 YEAH. 678 00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:05,500 HI. MY NAME IS CATHERINE. 679 00:41:05,500 --> 00:41:07,500 YEAH, I KNOW. 680 00:41:07,500 --> 00:41:10,291 WE JUST HAD SEX FIVE MINUTES AGO. 681 00:41:14,792 --> 00:41:17,208 NOT SCORING ANY COCK EITHER ? 682 00:41:17,208 --> 00:41:19,208 COCK ? 683 00:41:19,208 --> 00:41:21,542 I’VE NEVER EVEN BEEN KISSED. 684 00:41:21,542 --> 00:41:23,333 HMM. 685 00:41:24,625 --> 00:41:26,625 WHAT UP, MY YELLOW BROTHERS ? 686 00:41:26,625 --> 00:41:28,500 CHINKS IN THE HOUSE ! 687 00:41:29,625 --> 00:41:31,500 HMMPH. 688 00:41:33,625 --> 00:41:36,500 ♪♪ [ Continues ] 689 00:41:38,917 --> 00:41:41,333 REGGIE RAY. [ Chuckling ] 690 00:41:41,333 --> 00:41:44,333 HAVE YOU SEEN JANEY ANYWHERE ? 691 00:41:44,333 --> 00:41:46,709 IT’S A GOOD NIGHT FOR SMOKIN’. 692 00:41:46,709 --> 00:41:48,667 [ Moaning ] AIN’T THAT RIGHT, SAUSAGE ? 693 00:41:52,125 --> 00:41:54,333 [ Burps ] 694 00:41:56,500 --> 00:41:58,417 OKAY. 695 00:41:58,417 --> 00:42:01,041 NOW CLOSE YOUR EYES AND WET YOUR LIPS. 696 00:42:01,041 --> 00:42:02,917 ARE YOU FOR REAL ? 697 00:42:02,917 --> 00:42:05,875 DO YOU WANT TO LEARN OR NOT ? 698 00:42:05,875 --> 00:42:07,792 I GUESS. 699 00:42:18,792 --> 00:42:22,208 SEE ? THAT WASN’T SO SCARY. 700 00:42:22,208 --> 00:42:24,500 IT WAS NOTHING. 701 00:42:25,750 --> 00:42:28,375 OKAY. 702 00:42:28,375 --> 00:42:30,750 LET’S TRY AGAIN. 703 00:42:30,750 --> 00:42:34,500 ONLY THIS TIME, I’M GONNA STICK MY TONGUE IN YOUR MOUTH. 704 00:42:35,750 --> 00:42:37,750 AND WHEN I DO THAT, 705 00:42:37,750 --> 00:42:40,458 I WANT YOU TO MASSAGE MY TONGUE WITH YOURS. 706 00:42:40,458 --> 00:42:42,959 AND THAT’S WHAT FIRST BASE IS. 707 00:42:42,959 --> 00:42:44,917 OKAY. 708 00:42:44,917 --> 00:42:46,917 EYES CLOSED. 709 00:42:46,917 --> 00:42:49,709 ♪♪ 710 00:43:01,917 --> 00:43:04,709 ♪♪ 711 00:43:12,166 --> 00:43:14,458 THAT WAS COOL. 712 00:43:16,792 --> 00:43:20,792 NOW, HAVE YOU EVER EATEN PUSSY BEFORE ? 713 00:43:22,291 --> 00:43:25,000 [ Chattering, Laughing ] 714 00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:27,500 YOU CALL THIS A PARTY ? 715 00:43:27,500 --> 00:43:29,458 I’M A GOLDEN GODDESS ! 716 00:43:29,458 --> 00:43:31,667 [ Boy ] SHOW US HOW DRUNK YOU ARE ! 717 00:43:31,667 --> 00:43:34,583 [ Girl ] GO FOR IT ! [ Cheering, Shouting ] 718 00:43:39,375 --> 00:43:42,000 [ Boy ] YOU’RE A UNIQUE REBEL, JANEY ! 719 00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:44,667 SORRY. JANEY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT ? 720 00:43:44,667 --> 00:43:47,125 I TOLD YOU NOT TO LET ME DRINK. 721 00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:50,583 JANEY, I GAVE YOU A NON-ALCOHOLIC BEER. 722 00:43:51,792 --> 00:43:53,458 OH. 723 00:43:54,792 --> 00:43:56,750 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE ? 724 00:43:56,750 --> 00:43:59,333 I-- I WAS INVITED. 725 00:43:59,333 --> 00:44:04,375 LOOK, YOU MAY HAVE LOST THOSE GLASSES AND THAT PONYTAIL THING YOU DO, 726 00:44:04,375 --> 00:44:07,125 BUT TO EVERYONE THAT MATTERS, YOU’RE STILL A LOSER. 727 00:44:08,417 --> 00:44:10,041 - [ All Gasping ] - [ Gasps ] 728 00:44:10,041 --> 00:44:11,917 OOPSIE. 729 00:44:11,917 --> 00:44:14,250 [ Laughs ] LOOK AT THAT. 730 00:44:14,250 --> 00:44:16,417 OH, MY GOD. OH, OH, OH. 731 00:44:16,417 --> 00:44:18,709 [ Girl ] OH, GEE, THAT’S GONNA STAIN ! 732 00:44:21,917 --> 00:44:26,000 OH. YOU’RE NOT GONNA CRY NOW, ARE YOU ? 733 00:44:30,083 --> 00:44:32,291 - [ Sighs ] - OH. 734 00:44:34,834 --> 00:44:37,083 [ Sobbing ] 735 00:44:39,917 --> 00:44:42,709 [ Continues Sobbing, Wailing ] 736 00:45:08,250 --> 00:45:10,291 LOOK, 737 00:45:10,291 --> 00:45:13,041 YOU CAN’T JUST START A SLOW CLAP AT ANY OLD TIME. 738 00:45:13,041 --> 00:45:15,083 YOU GOTTA WAIT FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT. 739 00:45:15,083 --> 00:45:19,333 BUT HOW AM I GOING TO KNOW WHEN IT’S THE RIGHT MOMENT ? 740 00:45:19,333 --> 00:45:21,333 OH, 741 00:45:21,333 --> 00:45:23,208 YOU’LL KNOW. 742 00:45:36,041 --> 00:45:38,667 NOBODY’S ALLOWED DOWN HERE. 743 00:45:38,667 --> 00:45:40,834 LISTEN, JANEY, I JUST THOUGHT-- 744 00:45:40,834 --> 00:45:44,250 HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE ? I DEAD-BOLTED THE DOOR. 745 00:45:44,250 --> 00:45:47,583 THERE’S A HOLE IN THE SIDE OF YOUR HOUSE. 746 00:45:52,917 --> 00:45:54,792 WHO’S THAT ? 747 00:45:54,792 --> 00:45:57,333 IT’S MY MOTHER. 748 00:45:57,333 --> 00:45:59,166 YOU HAVE HER EYES. 749 00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:02,959 SHE DIED WHEN I WAS SIX. 750 00:46:02,959 --> 00:46:06,041 OH. I’M SORRY. 751 00:46:07,375 --> 00:46:09,667 I REMEMBER IT LIKE IT WAS YESTERDAY. 752 00:46:09,667 --> 00:46:13,166 CHRISTMAS, 1989. 753 00:46:13,166 --> 00:46:16,208 DAD HAD JUST GOTTEN FIRED FROM THE ZIPPER FACTORY, 754 00:46:16,208 --> 00:46:19,375 MOM WAS STILL PULLING IN TRICKS TO MAKE ENDS MEET, 755 00:46:19,375 --> 00:46:23,083 - DANIEL DAY-LEWIS WON AN OSCAR FOR MY LEFT FOOT, - HMM. 756 00:46:23,083 --> 00:46:26,583 AND ALL I WANTED WAS ONE OF THOSE LITTLE BETSY WETSY DOLLS. 757 00:46:26,583 --> 00:46:31,625 I REMEMBER THOSE. YOU PUSH HER BELLY, SHE’D PISS ALL OVER HERSELF. 758 00:46:31,625 --> 00:46:35,458 SHE SAID SHE WAS GOING OUT TO GET MY DAD A BOTTLE OF GIN, BUT... 759 00:46:35,458 --> 00:46:38,375 I KNEW SHE WAS GOING TO GET ME THAT PRESENT. 760 00:46:40,250 --> 00:46:44,208 IT WAS RAINING REALLY HARD THAT NIGHT. [ Rain Falling ] 761 00:46:44,208 --> 00:46:47,417 THE ROADS WERE... SLIPPERY. 762 00:46:47,417 --> 00:46:49,291 OH, GOD, JANEY. [ Tires Screeching ] 763 00:46:49,291 --> 00:46:51,250 [ Crash ] A CAR ACCIDENT. 764 00:46:51,250 --> 00:46:53,000 NO. CANCER. 765 00:46:54,834 --> 00:46:57,125 [ Sighs ] 766 00:46:57,125 --> 00:47:00,917 IT WAS SO HARD. I HAD TO TAKE ON ALL OF HER RESPONSIBILITIES. 767 00:47:00,917 --> 00:47:03,917 THE COOKING AND CLEANING AND BREAST-FEEDING MITCH. 768 00:47:03,917 --> 00:47:06,333 OH, JANEY, THAT’S ALL IN THE PAST NOW. 769 00:47:06,333 --> 00:47:09,875 YOU GOTTA START THINKING ABOUT YOUR FUTURE. LOOK HOW TALENTED YOU ARE. 770 00:47:09,875 --> 00:47:15,667 I HAVE THIS DREAM OF ONE DAY JUST HOPPING ON A PLANE AND GOING TO PARIS. 771 00:47:15,667 --> 00:47:18,667 THERE’S AN ART SCHOOL THERE, BUT I CAN’T AFFORD IT. 772 00:47:18,667 --> 00:47:23,000 UNLESS I FOUND SOME WAY OF RAISING $26,000 BEFORE THE ADMISSIONS CUT-OFF. 773 00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,291 OH, MY GOD, JANEY. 774 00:47:25,291 --> 00:47:29,000 MY PARENTS GIVE A SCHOLARSHIP TO A GIRL WHO CAN’T GET INTO ART SCHOOL EVERY YEAR. 775 00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,125 REALLY ? THAT’S AMAZING ! 776 00:47:31,125 --> 00:47:35,667 YEAH. THIS YEAR WE GAVE IT TO LUPE RODRIGUEZ, THE MEXICAN FINGER-PAINTER. 777 00:47:35,667 --> 00:47:37,792 I THINK YOU’D REALLY LIKE HER WORK. 778 00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:41,458 SOMETIMES I JUST-- 779 00:47:41,458 --> 00:47:43,709 I WISH MY LIFE WAS A FAIRY TALE... 780 00:47:43,709 --> 00:47:46,667 AND SOME GUY WOULD JUST COME AND TAKE ME AWAY FROM ALL THIS. 781 00:47:46,667 --> 00:47:49,166 SHH. 782 00:48:04,125 --> 00:48:07,041 OH ! OH, UM-- OH-- 783 00:48:07,041 --> 00:48:09,041 [ Chuckles ] 784 00:48:09,041 --> 00:48:11,041 [ Chuckles ] 785 00:48:11,041 --> 00:48:13,041 I-I WAS-- YEAH. 786 00:48:13,041 --> 00:48:16,041 MY EYES WERE SHUT, AND I WAS GONNA-- RIGHT, AND WE COULDN’T-- 787 00:48:16,041 --> 00:48:18,458 TO-- WHOO. [ Chuckles ] 788 00:48:22,500 --> 00:48:24,500 UH, 789 00:48:24,500 --> 00:48:26,500 I’M GONNA, UM-- 790 00:48:26,500 --> 00:48:30,000 NO, I’M GONNA, UM-- I’M GONNA GO. YEAH, UM-- OKAY. 791 00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:33,041 [ Woman On P.A. ] CONGRATULATIONS GO OUT TO ALL THE YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN... 792 00:48:33,041 --> 00:48:35,417 NOMINATED FOR PROM QUEEN. 793 00:48:43,792 --> 00:48:48,083 YOU THINK YOU’RE GONNA BE PROM QUEEN ? WELL, THINK AGAIN, JANEY. 794 00:48:48,083 --> 00:48:52,041 BECAUSE YOU PUT THE "ASS" IN "EMBARRASSMENT," THE "BOO" IN "TABOO"... 795 00:48:52,041 --> 00:48:55,125 AND THE "SUCK" IN "LIPOSUCTION." 796 00:48:58,667 --> 00:49:01,542 IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO ? 797 00:49:01,542 --> 00:49:04,291 NO. 798 00:49:04,291 --> 00:49:06,834 YOU ALSO PUT THE "BRAT" IN "BRATWURST"... 799 00:49:06,834 --> 00:49:10,041 AND THE "OOH" IN "JUJITSU"... 800 00:49:10,041 --> 00:49:14,625 AND THE "ISM" IN "THIS IS ALL JUST A DEFENSE MECHANISM" ! 801 00:49:17,125 --> 00:49:21,083 [ Austin ] SO I TOLD HER, "YOU TAKE THE OLD LADY AND SEND YOUR MAMA BACK IN." 802 00:49:21,083 --> 00:49:23,083 [ Laughing ] 803 00:49:23,083 --> 00:49:28,125 SO, WYLER, YOU ASKED YOUR FOUR-EYED CIRCUS FREAK TO THE PROM YET ? 804 00:49:28,125 --> 00:49:30,458 [ Together ] WE RESENT THAT ! [ Disgusted Sigh ] 805 00:49:31,792 --> 00:49:33,834 JUST DROP IT. OKAY, AUSTIN ? 806 00:49:33,834 --> 00:49:38,834 WHOA, LOOKS LIKE JAKE HERE’S MADE A FEW PAINT STAINS IN HIS PANTS... 807 00:49:38,834 --> 00:49:41,125 THINKING ABOUT JANEY. 808 00:49:41,125 --> 00:49:43,041 IT’S JUST A BET. OKAY, MAN ? 809 00:49:43,041 --> 00:49:47,083 YOU ALWAYS DID HAVE A THING FOR BUTT-UGLY GIRLS, 810 00:49:47,083 --> 00:49:50,083 MR. I HAVE A THING FOR BUTT-UGLY GIRLS. 811 00:49:50,083 --> 00:49:52,125 [ Laughing ] 812 00:49:52,125 --> 00:49:54,709 I’M JUST-- ARE YOU TALKIN’ ’BOUT JANEY ? 813 00:49:54,709 --> 00:49:58,500 ’CAUSE I SAW HER AT THE PARTY AND SHE WAS LOOKIN’ GOOD AS A DUMPSTER FILLED WITH GRISTLES. 814 00:49:58,500 --> 00:50:00,166 BLING-BLING ! 815 00:50:02,125 --> 00:50:03,917 JANEY BRIGGS... 816 00:50:05,125 --> 00:50:07,041 IS HOT. 817 00:50:23,917 --> 00:50:26,917 HEY, JANEY. OH ! HEY, JAKE. 818 00:50:26,917 --> 00:50:30,083 LISTEN, I’VE BEEN DOING A LOT OF THINKING. 819 00:50:30,083 --> 00:50:33,166 THE THING IS, THERE’S SOMETHING I WANT TO ASK YOU. 820 00:50:35,041 --> 00:50:38,208 I DON’T WANNA MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT AND DRAG IT OUT, 821 00:50:38,208 --> 00:50:41,417 SO I’M JUST GONNA LAY IT OUT THERE, OKAY ? 822 00:50:43,125 --> 00:50:45,250 HERE IT IS. 823 00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:50,667 SEE, I DON’T LIKE MAKING BIG SPEECHES. [ Chuckles ] 824 00:50:50,667 --> 00:50:54,583 I’M A STRAIGHT SHOOTER. I-I-I CALL ’EM LIKE I SEE ’EM. 825 00:50:54,583 --> 00:50:56,959 W-W-WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET. 826 00:50:56,959 --> 00:50:59,875 A-AIN’T NOBODY GONNA BREAK-A MY STRIDE. 827 00:50:59,875 --> 00:51:01,834 AIN’T NOBODY GONNA SLOW ME DOWN. 828 00:51:01,834 --> 00:51:03,875 OH, NO-- JAKE. 829 00:51:03,875 --> 00:51:06,291 ARE YOU TRYING TO ASK ME TO THE-- 830 00:51:06,291 --> 00:51:08,834 YEAH. [ Stammering ] 831 00:51:08,834 --> 00:51:11,083 I’D LOVE TO GO WITH YOU. 832 00:51:14,083 --> 00:51:16,000 GREAT ! 833 00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:18,083 GREAT. [ Chuckles ] 834 00:51:18,083 --> 00:51:20,041 UH-- 835 00:51:20,041 --> 00:51:22,375 UM, I’LL SEE YOU IN ENGLISH. 836 00:51:22,375 --> 00:51:24,083 [ Gasps ] YOU-- 837 00:51:26,834 --> 00:51:29,750 ALL RIGHT, IT’S TIME TO PLAY SOME FOOTBALL ! 838 00:51:29,750 --> 00:51:33,625 TONIGHT, THE JOHN HUGHES WASPS DEFEND THEIR TITLE... 839 00:51:33,625 --> 00:51:35,291 AGAINST THE NORTH COMPTON WILDCATS ! 840 00:51:35,291 --> 00:51:37,000 [ Whistle Blows ] 841 00:51:41,542 --> 00:51:43,959 [ Grunting, Shouting ] 842 00:51:52,959 --> 00:51:54,625 GODDAMN ! 843 00:52:01,125 --> 00:52:05,125 WOW, THAT WAS THE FASTEST FIRST HALF OF FOOTBALL I’VE EVER SEEN ! 844 00:52:09,458 --> 00:52:13,917 DON’T THINK YOU’RE FOOLING US. WE SAW YOU AT OUR PRACTICE. I KNOW YOU STOLE OUR ROUTINE. 845 00:52:13,917 --> 00:52:18,000 OKAY, I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT, BECAUSE WE’VE ALWAYS DONE OUR OWN CHEERS. 846 00:52:18,000 --> 00:52:20,166 - RIGHT, GIRLS ? - [ Both ] THAT’S RIGHT. 847 00:52:20,166 --> 00:52:23,417 WELL, THEN, YOU BETTER BRING IT. 848 00:52:23,417 --> 00:52:25,959 OH, IT’S ALREADY BEEN BROUGHT-ED. 849 00:52:25,959 --> 00:52:28,959 [ Girl ] NICE COMEBACK, PRISCILLA ! YEAH ! 850 00:52:28,959 --> 00:52:32,500 WE ARE THE NORTH COMPTON WILDCATS ! 851 00:52:32,500 --> 00:52:36,291 WE’RE BLACK ! WE KNOW IT ! WE SHAKE OUR BIG BOOTIES AND SHOW IT ! 852 00:52:36,291 --> 00:52:38,709 WE AIN’T WHITE ! WE AIN’T WHITE ! 853 00:52:38,709 --> 00:52:41,166 WE DEFINITELY AIN’T WHITE ! BREAK IT DOWN, NIGGAS ! 854 00:52:41,166 --> 00:52:44,041 ♪♪ [ Hip-Hop ] 855 00:52:47,875 --> 00:52:50,875 DAMN ! THOSE BITCHES REPRESENT ! 856 00:52:50,875 --> 00:52:54,458 ♪♪ [ Continues ] 857 00:52:57,458 --> 00:52:59,875 - [ Crowd Cheering ] - WHOO ! ALL RIGHT ! 858 00:52:59,875 --> 00:53:02,917 HEY, REGGIE RAY. I SMELL A BET. 859 00:53:04,208 --> 00:53:06,208 YOU ALL RIGHT ? 860 00:53:06,208 --> 00:53:08,709 COACH SAYS IT’S ALL RIGHT TO BLEED FROM THE EARS. 861 00:53:14,208 --> 00:53:18,542 I GOTTA GO BACK OUT ON THE FIELD. 862 00:53:18,542 --> 00:53:21,458 ALL RIGHT. JUST BE CAREFUL. YOU KNOW, YOU ONLY HAVE THREE-- LET’S GO, WASPS ! 863 00:53:21,458 --> 00:53:24,166 [ Grunts ] TWO CONCUSSIONS LEFT. 864 00:53:24,166 --> 00:53:26,125 REGGIE RAY. 865 00:53:26,125 --> 00:53:29,542 - AND WE’RE BACK FOR THE SECOND HALF. - [ Crowd Cheering ] 866 00:53:29,542 --> 00:53:32,250 LET’S GO, WASPS ! 867 00:53:32,250 --> 00:53:34,333 LET’S GO, WASPS ! [ Muttering ] 868 00:53:34,333 --> 00:53:36,375 LET’S GO, WASPS ! 869 00:53:36,375 --> 00:53:39,208 - [ Moaning ] - BLUE 33 ! 870 00:53:39,208 --> 00:53:41,458 HUT ! 871 00:53:41,458 --> 00:53:44,000 - [ Whistle Blows ] - [ Coach ] THAT’S DEFENSE RIGHT THERE, BABY ! 872 00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:47,417 OH ! SAY G’DAY TO REGGIE RAY. 873 00:53:47,417 --> 00:53:49,291 [ Bell Dings ] 874 00:53:49,291 --> 00:53:53,000 SIT DOWN, BOY. HE JUST GOT THE WIND KNOCKED OUT OF HIM. 875 00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:55,583 [ Man ] COME ON, REGGIE RAY ! GET UP ! 876 00:53:55,583 --> 00:53:59,000 - REGGIE RAY ! - YOU STILL HAVE ANOTHER CONCUSSION ! 877 00:54:02,375 --> 00:54:04,375 COME ON, BIG DOG. 878 00:54:04,375 --> 00:54:06,417 DOESN’T LOOK GOOD, COACH. 879 00:54:06,417 --> 00:54:08,750 CAN HE PLAY ? HE’S IN A COMA. 880 00:54:08,750 --> 00:54:12,041 ANSWER MY QUESTION ! CAN HE PLAY ? 881 00:54:12,041 --> 00:54:15,166 I DON’T EVEN THINK HE CAN BREATHE. WE GOTTA GET HIM TO A HOSPITAL IMMEDIATELY. 882 00:54:15,166 --> 00:54:18,625 YOU LISTEN TO ME RIGHT NOW ! I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO ! 883 00:54:18,625 --> 00:54:21,625 REGGIE RAY STAYS IN THE GAME, GODDAMN IT ! 884 00:54:21,625 --> 00:54:23,875 [ Hawking Phlegm ] 885 00:54:26,959 --> 00:54:28,875 [ Cheering ] 886 00:54:33,583 --> 00:54:37,041 HOLY SHIT ! THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S HEAVY. 887 00:54:37,041 --> 00:54:39,959 BLUE 15 ! 888 00:54:41,500 --> 00:54:43,041 SET ! HUT ! 889 00:54:45,834 --> 00:54:49,250 - [ Squeaks ] - GODDAMN IT, REGGIE RAY ! 890 00:54:49,250 --> 00:54:52,500 - [ Growling ] - AW, SHIT ! 891 00:55:00,083 --> 00:55:03,458 AAAH ! 892 00:55:06,125 --> 00:55:08,667 WHOO-HOO-HOO-HOO ! 893 00:55:10,500 --> 00:55:13,792 WHAM, BAM ! WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED ? 894 00:55:13,792 --> 00:55:16,834 [ Groaning ] 895 00:55:16,834 --> 00:55:19,125 OKAY, WYLER, I’VE GOT NO CHOICE. 896 00:55:19,125 --> 00:55:22,250 YOU’RE THE ONLY QUARTERBACK I’VE GOT LEFT. 897 00:55:22,250 --> 00:55:24,834 [ Jake’s Voice ] I SAY WE GIVE THE BALL TO MARTY. 898 00:55:24,834 --> 00:55:27,458 [ Coach’s Voice ] ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS RUN OUT THE CLOCK. 899 00:55:27,458 --> 00:55:29,208 [ Voices Overlapping ] 900 00:55:29,208 --> 00:55:31,333 [ Marty’s Voice ] I’M A HERO ! 901 00:55:34,500 --> 00:55:36,834 WYLER, GODDAMN IT ! GET YOUR PANSY ASS IN THE GAME ! 902 00:55:36,834 --> 00:55:40,250 YOU’RE OUR ONLY CHANCE, GODDAMN IT ! 903 00:55:40,250 --> 00:55:43,709 YOU’RE A PUSSY, WYLER ! DO IT FOR MARTY’S TORSO ! 904 00:55:47,583 --> 00:55:50,834 - YOU GOT BUTTERFLIES, HUH ? - WHO ARE YOU ? 905 00:55:57,917 --> 00:55:59,917 I’M THE WISE JANITOR. 906 00:55:59,917 --> 00:56:03,625 I’M HERE TO IMPART KNOWLEDGE, HELP YOUNGSTERS OVERCOME THEIR FEARS. 907 00:56:03,625 --> 00:56:06,542 ALSO REPLACE THE SANITARY CAKES IN THE URINALS. 908 00:56:06,542 --> 00:56:10,291 BUT RIGHT NOW, I’M HERE TO HELP YOU GET YOUR THROW BACK. 909 00:56:10,291 --> 00:56:12,959 HOW DID YOU-- I’VE BEEN WATCHING YOU, KID, DURIN’ PRACTICE, 910 00:56:12,959 --> 00:56:17,083 IN THE HALLWAYS, IN THE LOCKER ROOMS, TAKING A SHOWER, 911 00:56:17,083 --> 00:56:19,709 WHUPPIN’ OTHER BOYS WITH A WET TOWEL. [ Grunts ] 912 00:56:19,709 --> 00:56:22,000 I CAN TELL YOU KINDA LIKE THAT. WHOA. HEY. 913 00:56:22,000 --> 00:56:24,458 LET’S JUST GET BACK TO THE THROW, OKAY ? 914 00:56:24,458 --> 00:56:27,458 LOOK, THE THING THAT HAPPENED WITH MARTY ? IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT. 915 00:56:27,458 --> 00:56:30,000 REALLY ? OKAY, IT WAS YOUR FAULT. 916 00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:33,834 BUT THE POINT IS, YOU GOT TO GET OVER IT. IT COULD’VE HAPPENED TO ANYBODY. 917 00:56:33,834 --> 00:56:38,333 ANYBODY THAT DISOBEYED THE COACH’S ORDERS AND THE TEAM’S WISHES... 918 00:56:38,333 --> 00:56:41,500 AND THREW A BULLET PASS TO A SLIGHTLY RETARDED 90-POUND KID... 919 00:56:41,500 --> 00:56:45,542 WHO SHOULD’VE NEVER HAVE BEEN ON THE FIELD IN THE FIRST PLACE. WHOA. STOP. 920 00:56:45,542 --> 00:56:48,542 HOW IS ANY OF THIS SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING ME ? YOU’RE RIGHT. 921 00:56:48,542 --> 00:56:52,208 FORGET ABOUT WHAT I SAID. THE MAIN THING, YOU GOTTA GO OUT THERE. 922 00:56:52,208 --> 00:56:54,667 BELIEVE IN THE BALL AND THROW YOURSELF. 923 00:56:54,667 --> 00:56:56,417 YOU CAN DO IT. 924 00:57:01,542 --> 00:57:04,250 I’M GOIN’ OUT THERE. 925 00:57:10,333 --> 00:57:12,709 [ Announcer ] ONLY 25 SECONDS REMAINING, 926 00:57:12,709 --> 00:57:16,625 AND THE FATE OF THE SEASON RESTS IN THE HANDS OF FOURTH-STRING QUARTERBACK... 927 00:57:16,625 --> 00:57:18,625 JAKE WYLER. 928 00:57:18,625 --> 00:57:22,208 TRANSLATION: WE’RE SHIT OUT OF LUCK. 929 00:57:22,208 --> 00:57:24,500 - GIVE ME A "W" ! - "W" ! 930 00:57:24,500 --> 00:57:26,500 GIVE ME A "Y" ! "Y" ! 931 00:57:26,500 --> 00:57:29,959 GIVE ME A-- LICK MY PUSSY ASS COCK SHIT ! 932 00:57:29,959 --> 00:57:33,333 LICK MY PUSSY ASS COCK SHIT ! 933 00:57:33,333 --> 00:57:36,875 - WHOO ! - [ All Cheering ] 934 00:57:36,875 --> 00:57:38,792 BLUE 83 ! 935 00:57:38,792 --> 00:57:41,291 BLUE 83 ! REGGIE RAY ? 936 00:57:41,291 --> 00:57:43,542 I RECKON I’M FEELING MUCH BETTER. 937 00:57:43,542 --> 00:57:45,458 SET ! HUT ! 938 00:57:59,417 --> 00:58:03,083 ♪ THERE GOES MY HERO ♪ 939 00:58:03,083 --> 00:58:06,000 ♪ WATCH HIM AS HE GOES ♪ 940 00:58:11,625 --> 00:58:15,792 ♪ THERE GOES MY HERO ♪ 941 00:58:15,792 --> 00:58:17,625 ♪ HE’S ORDINARY ♪♪ 942 00:58:28,959 --> 00:58:31,542 OH, SHIT. 943 00:58:31,542 --> 00:58:35,917 - [ All Groaning ] - [ Bell Dings ] 944 00:58:40,750 --> 00:58:44,875 [ Quiet Groaning ] 945 00:58:44,875 --> 00:58:49,417 THAT HAS TO BE THE WORST PASS I’VE EVER SEEN... EVER ! 946 00:58:51,542 --> 00:58:53,583 WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ? 947 00:58:56,583 --> 00:59:00,792 [ One Person Clapping Slowly ] 948 00:59:09,917 --> 00:59:13,542 [ Pig Squealing ] 949 00:59:21,834 --> 00:59:23,625 JAKE ? 950 00:59:25,709 --> 00:59:28,208 JAKE. 951 00:59:28,208 --> 00:59:32,083 HEY. YOU DID GREAT OUT THERE. 952 00:59:32,083 --> 00:59:35,834 I BLEW THE GAME, JANEY. I LET EVERYONE DOWN. 953 00:59:35,834 --> 00:59:39,166 IT’S JUST A FOOTBALL GAME, JAKE. 954 00:59:39,166 --> 00:59:41,750 BESIDES, 955 00:59:41,750 --> 00:59:44,291 YOU DIDN’T LET ME DOWN. 956 00:59:44,291 --> 00:59:46,667 REALLY ? 957 00:59:46,667 --> 00:59:49,834 [ Groaning ] JAKE, YOU’VE TAUGHT ME TO BE MYSELF. 958 00:59:49,834 --> 00:59:53,083 YOU NEVER SAW ME AS THE GIRL IN GLASSES AND A PONYTAIL. 959 00:59:53,083 --> 00:59:56,125 DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE PAINT-COVERED OVERALLS. 960 00:59:56,125 --> 00:59:58,750 RIGHT, YOU NEVER NOTICED THOSE EITHER. 961 00:59:58,750 --> 01:00:02,250 YOU’VE TAUGHT ME A LOT ABOUT MYSELF TOO, JANEY. 962 01:00:02,250 --> 01:00:04,750 OH, JAKE. 963 01:00:04,750 --> 01:00:07,667 NOTHING COULD EVER COME BETWEEN US NOW. 964 01:00:07,667 --> 01:00:09,667 JAKE WYLER. 965 01:00:09,667 --> 01:00:13,625 SO CONGRATULATIONS, MAN. YOU JUST BLEW MY PERFECT SEASON. 966 01:00:13,625 --> 01:00:15,750 SENOR, YOU JUST BLEW MY PERFECT SEASON. 967 01:00:15,750 --> 01:00:18,959 - WHAT DO YOU WANT, AUSTIN ? - A LIFE. 968 01:00:20,583 --> 01:00:22,250 AND PAYBACK. 969 01:00:22,250 --> 01:00:24,250 COME ON, MAN. DON’T DO THIS. 970 01:00:24,250 --> 01:00:26,250 NO, MAN, I THINK I’LL HANG AROUND, 971 01:00:26,250 --> 01:00:31,375 MAYBE TELL JANEY A LITTLE S-E-C-R-A-T-P. 972 01:00:31,375 --> 01:00:33,792 UH-- 973 01:00:33,792 --> 01:00:36,125 WHAT’S GOING ON ? 974 01:00:36,125 --> 01:00:38,083 - AUSTIN. - [ Inhales ] 975 01:00:38,083 --> 01:00:40,750 - AUSTIN, THIS ISN’T FUNNY ! - [ Whispering ] 976 01:00:40,750 --> 01:00:43,208 NO. 977 01:00:43,208 --> 01:00:45,542 I DON’T BELIEVE IT. ALL RIGHT, JANEY. 978 01:00:45,542 --> 01:00:47,959 I SAID I COULD TURN YOU INTO PROM QUEEN, 979 01:00:47,959 --> 01:00:51,542 BUT THAT’S WHEN I THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST UGLY JANEY BRIGGS, THE GIRL WITH NO FRIENDS... 980 01:00:51,542 --> 01:00:54,458 AND WHO WAS DIRT POOR AND SMELLED A LITTLE FUNKY. 981 01:00:54,458 --> 01:00:57,834 - [ Sighs ] - LOOK, I MADE A MISTAKE. 982 01:00:57,834 --> 01:01:02,041 IF I COULD GO BACK NOW, I NEVER WOULD’VE MADE THAT STUPID BET. 983 01:01:03,667 --> 01:01:06,291 [ Pig Squealing ] WHAT BET ? 984 01:01:08,458 --> 01:01:12,667 WHOA. I NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A BET. 985 01:01:19,792 --> 01:01:23,792 [ Blubbering, Sobbing ] 986 01:01:23,792 --> 01:01:27,125 ALL I SAID WAS, "I’M PRETENDING TO WHISPER A BIG SECRET IN YOUR EAR... 987 01:01:27,125 --> 01:01:29,709 "SO THAT JAKE THINKS I’M TELLING YOU A BIG SECRET, 988 01:01:29,709 --> 01:01:33,792 "WHICH WILL CAUSE HIM TO BREAK INTO A HYSTERICAL CONFESSION WHERE HE REVEALS A BIG SECRET, 989 01:01:33,792 --> 01:01:38,041 THUS CONFIRMING EVERYTHING I JUST WHISPERED IN YOUR EAR." 990 01:02:03,834 --> 01:02:07,709 ♪ I WISH I DIDN’T MAKE THAT BET ♪ 991 01:02:07,709 --> 01:02:11,375 ♪ THAT’S NOT THE GUY I WANT TO BE ♪ 992 01:02:11,375 --> 01:02:15,000 ♪ IF I COULD JUST TURN BACK THE CLOCK ♪ 993 01:02:15,000 --> 01:02:18,333 ♪ THEN JANEY WOULD STILL BE ♪ 994 01:02:18,333 --> 01:02:20,125 ♪ WITH ME ♪ 995 01:02:22,875 --> 01:02:26,250 ♪ TELL ME, MOM WHAT SHOULD I DO ♪ 996 01:02:26,250 --> 01:02:29,834 ♪ I LOVE THIS BOY BUT HE HAS BEEN ♪ 997 01:02:29,834 --> 01:02:34,125 ♪ UNTRUE ♪ 998 01:02:35,875 --> 01:02:39,834 ♪ I’LL DO MY BEST TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT ♪ 999 01:02:39,834 --> 01:02:42,917 ♪ I WISH WE COULD RESOLVE THIS FIGHT ♪ 1000 01:02:44,208 --> 01:02:46,208 ♪ IT COULD HAPPEN ♪ 1001 01:02:46,208 --> 01:02:48,208 ♪ IT COULD HAPPEN ♪ 1002 01:02:48,208 --> 01:02:51,750 [ Both ] ♪ AT THE PROM TONIGHT ♪ 1003 01:02:57,709 --> 01:03:00,875 ♪ I’M GETTING PUSSY NO MATTER WHAT ♪ 1004 01:03:00,875 --> 01:03:03,917 ♪ EVEN IF IT WITH DIRTY SLUT ♪ 1005 01:03:03,917 --> 01:03:06,709 ♪ TRUE LOVE IS WHAT I WANT THE MOST ♪ 1006 01:03:06,709 --> 01:03:10,667 ♪ I JUST JERKED OFF IN YOUR FRENCH TOAST ♪ 1007 01:03:10,667 --> 01:03:16,667 ♪ SO WHAT IF WE HAVE THE SAME MOTHER ♪ 1008 01:03:16,667 --> 01:03:22,083 ♪ TONIGHT I’M GONNA FUCK MY BROTHER ♪ 1009 01:03:22,083 --> 01:03:24,959 ♪ IN A FEW HOURS I’LL BE QUEEN OF THE PROM ♪ 1010 01:03:27,792 --> 01:03:30,959 ♪ I’VE BEEN AN ALCOHOLIC SINCE MY FIRST TOUR IN ’NAM ♪ 1011 01:03:33,792 --> 01:03:37,208 ♪ I ASKED JANEY TO THE PROM AND SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHY ♪ 1012 01:03:39,959 --> 01:03:44,083 ♪ I’M ONLY IN THIS SONG BECAUSE I’M A BLACK GUY ♪ 1013 01:03:44,083 --> 01:03:46,959 HEY ! LOOK OUT. [ Material Ripping ] 1014 01:03:46,959 --> 01:03:48,959 ♪ I HAVE NO MONEY ♪ 1015 01:03:48,959 --> 01:03:53,041 ♪ I HAVE TO MAKE MY OWN DRESS ♪ AAH ! 1016 01:03:53,041 --> 01:03:54,959 ♪ LOOK AT ME ♪ 1017 01:03:54,959 --> 01:03:57,792 ♪ MY BREASTS ARE PERKY YES ♪ 1018 01:03:57,792 --> 01:03:59,500 ♪ YES ♪ 1019 01:03:59,500 --> 01:04:02,625 ♪ I’M GONNA WIN HER BACK NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES ♪ 1020 01:04:02,625 --> 01:04:08,417 ♪ HERE I GO I’M GONNA FORGET ABOUT JAKE ♪ 1021 01:04:10,625 --> 01:04:14,500 ♪ PROM TONIGHT DO-DO, DO-DO-DO ♪ 1022 01:04:14,500 --> 01:04:17,875 ♪ PROM TONIGHT DO-DO, DO-DO-DO ♪ 1023 01:04:17,875 --> 01:04:21,291 ♪ PROM TONIGHT DO-DO, DO-DO-DO ♪ 1024 01:04:21,291 --> 01:04:24,792 ♪ AH-AH ♪ 1025 01:04:24,792 --> 01:04:27,583 ♪ IT’S GONNA HAPPEN ♪ ♪ GONNA HAPPEN ♪ 1026 01:04:27,583 --> 01:04:31,083 ♪ GONNA HAPPEN ♪ 1027 01:04:31,083 --> 01:04:37,375 ♪ AT THE PROM ♪ 1028 01:04:37,375 --> 01:04:39,125 ♪ TONIGHT ♪♪ 1029 01:04:43,542 --> 01:04:48,542 [ Sighing, Panting ] 1030 01:04:48,542 --> 01:04:52,583 ♪ I NEED YOU NOW LIKE I NEEDED YOU THEN ♪ 1031 01:04:52,583 --> 01:04:56,000 ♪ YOU ALWAYS SAID WE’D STILL BE FRIENDS ♪ 1032 01:04:56,000 --> 01:04:57,917 ♪ I TOUCH YOU ONCE ♪♪ 1033 01:04:57,917 --> 01:05:00,208 WHEN I WAS A FRESHMAN, 1034 01:05:00,208 --> 01:05:04,542 I THREW 176... TOUCHDOWN PASSES. 1035 01:05:04,542 --> 01:05:07,834 MY SOPHOMORE YEAR, I RAN 14 IN ON MY OWN... 1036 01:05:07,834 --> 01:05:10,917 WITH A SPRAINED ANKLE, A BROKEN PHALANGE, 1037 01:05:10,917 --> 01:05:14,625 A RUPTURED DUODENUM AND A "SUBDERMAL" HEMATOMA. 1038 01:05:14,625 --> 01:05:17,041 ♪ SCOOBY-DOOBY DOO-BOP ♪ 1039 01:05:17,041 --> 01:05:20,917 ♪ SCOO-SCOOBY-DOOBY DOOBY-DOOBY-DOOBY DO-BOP, YEAH ♪♪ 1040 01:05:31,458 --> 01:05:33,834 I BET SHE GREAT BONK. 1041 01:05:33,834 --> 01:05:37,375 EXCUSE ME, BRUCE ? NO, YOU DO NOT BONK AMANDA BECKER. 1042 01:05:37,375 --> 01:05:42,291 YOU MAKE SWEET, SWEET LOVE TO HER. 1043 01:05:42,291 --> 01:05:45,125 AMANDA BECKER’S LIKE A FLOWER. 1044 01:05:45,125 --> 01:05:49,208 YOU SMELL HER. YOU TOUCH HER GENTLY. 1045 01:05:49,208 --> 01:05:53,083 YOU ADMIRE THE BEAUTY. YOU WATCH IT BLOSSOM. 1046 01:05:54,709 --> 01:05:59,208 AND YOU THANK GOD HE CREATED SOMETHING SO PERFECT. 1047 01:05:59,208 --> 01:06:01,750 ♪ I KNOW THIS MUCH ♪ 1048 01:06:01,750 --> 01:06:04,083 ♪ IS TRUE ♪ GO TO HER. 1049 01:06:04,083 --> 01:06:08,083 ♪ AH-HA-HA-HA-HA ♪ 1050 01:06:08,083 --> 01:06:10,959 ♪ I KNOW THIS ♪ UM, AM-AMANDA. 1051 01:06:14,041 --> 01:06:17,667 ♪ AH-HA-HA-HA-HA ♪♪ [ Ox ] BE STRONG, MITCH. 1052 01:06:31,125 --> 01:06:34,125 WHAT DO YOU EXPECT FROM ME ? 1053 01:06:34,125 --> 01:06:36,583 DO YOU THINK I’M JUST GONNA HAVE SEX WITH YOU ? 1054 01:06:36,583 --> 01:06:39,125 NO. NO, NO. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. 1055 01:06:39,125 --> 01:06:41,333 ’CAUSE I AM NOT SOME KIND OF CHEAP SLUT. 1056 01:06:41,333 --> 01:06:44,458 I DON’T SCREW EVERY PATHETIC GUY THAT GIVES ME A LETTER. 1057 01:06:48,125 --> 01:06:51,625 I GIVE THEM HAND JOBS. 1058 01:06:51,625 --> 01:06:53,792 ♪ HEY ♪ 1059 01:06:53,792 --> 01:06:55,917 ♪ HEY ♪ 1060 01:06:55,917 --> 01:06:58,208 ♪ HEY ♪ 1061 01:06:58,208 --> 01:07:00,125 ♪ HEY ♪ WANNA DANCE ? 1062 01:07:00,125 --> 01:07:02,583 ONLY IF WE’RE HORIZONTAL. 1063 01:07:02,583 --> 01:07:04,375 I TOTALLY HEARD THAT. 1064 01:07:09,125 --> 01:07:11,208 ♪ HEY ♪ 1065 01:07:11,208 --> 01:07:13,041 ♪ HEY ♪ 1066 01:07:18,291 --> 01:07:20,667 WE’RE DANCING. 1067 01:07:20,667 --> 01:07:22,750 ♪ I KNOW A GIRL WHO’S TOUGH BUT SWEET ♪ 1068 01:07:22,750 --> 01:07:24,917 WHOO-HOO-HOO ! 1069 01:07:24,917 --> 01:07:28,750 ♪ SHE’S SO FINE SHE CAN’T BE BEAT ♪ 1070 01:07:28,750 --> 01:07:31,792 ♪ SHE’S GOT EVERYTHING THAT I DESIRE ♪ 1071 01:07:33,542 --> 01:07:35,959 ♪ SHE SETS THE SUMMER SUN ON FIRE ♪ 1072 01:07:35,959 --> 01:07:38,000 OOH ! 1073 01:07:38,000 --> 01:07:40,083 ♪ I WANT CANDY ♪ 1074 01:07:41,792 --> 01:07:43,917 IT’S FUNNY, ISN’T IT ? 1075 01:07:43,917 --> 01:07:47,250 YOU WOULD NEVER SUSPECT THAT EVERYONE AT THIS SCHOOL IS A PROFESSIONAL DANCER. 1076 01:07:56,208 --> 01:07:58,583 ♪ I WANT CANDY ♪ 1077 01:08:00,208 --> 01:08:02,959 - ♪ I WANT CANDY ♪ - OH, GOD ! NO. 1078 01:08:02,959 --> 01:08:06,542 I WANNA DO IT RIGHT HERE ON THE DANCE FLOOR. JANEY ! 1079 01:08:06,542 --> 01:08:09,750 DON’T YOU FORGET OUR DEAL. SHE WINS, YOU’RE MINE. 1080 01:08:10,959 --> 01:08:12,917 ♪ HEY ♪ 1081 01:08:12,917 --> 01:08:15,000 ♪ HEY ♪♪ 1082 01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:17,709 [ Cheering, Whooping ] 1083 01:08:22,000 --> 01:08:25,417 AND NOW, THE MOMENT EVERY POPULAR GUY... 1084 01:08:25,417 --> 01:08:29,208 WHO’S MADE A BET TO TURN A UNIQUELY REBELLIOUS GIRL INTO PROM QUEEN... 1085 01:08:29,208 --> 01:08:31,208 HAS BEEN WAITING FOR. 1086 01:08:31,208 --> 01:08:34,500 THE ANNOUNCEMENT OF THIS YEAR’S PROM KING AND QUEEN. 1087 01:08:34,500 --> 01:08:37,375 THIS YEAR’S PROM KING IS... 1088 01:08:37,375 --> 01:08:39,083 ♪♪ [ Drum Roll ] [ Boy ] MARTY ! 1089 01:08:39,083 --> 01:08:42,792 JAKE WYLER. 1090 01:08:56,250 --> 01:08:57,875 [ Boy ] WAY TO GO, JAKE ! 1091 01:08:57,875 --> 01:09:01,375 THIS YEAR’S PROM QUEEN IS... 1092 01:09:01,375 --> 01:09:04,333 [ Girl ] YOU’VE GOT IT, PRISCILLA. IT’S IN THE BAG, PRISCILLA. 1093 01:09:04,333 --> 01:09:06,583 I DON’T BELIEVE IT. IT’S A TIE. 1094 01:09:06,583 --> 01:09:11,291 [ Gasping ] [ Girl ] A TIE ? HOLY SHIT. 1095 01:09:11,291 --> 01:09:13,875 YOUR NEW PROM QUEENS ARE... 1096 01:09:15,250 --> 01:09:18,875 KARA AND SARA FRATELLI. 1097 01:09:18,875 --> 01:09:20,875 [ Girl ] FUCK ! OH, MY GOD ! 1098 01:09:20,875 --> 01:09:24,041 [ Girl ] THEY DESERVE IT. 1099 01:09:25,583 --> 01:09:27,542 CONGRATULATIONS. OHH ! 1100 01:09:27,542 --> 01:09:31,250 OKAY. THERE WE GO ! 1101 01:09:31,250 --> 01:09:35,166 YOUR KING AND QUEEN ! [ Cheering Continues ] 1102 01:09:39,333 --> 01:09:43,542 I SAY WE MAKE LIKE A TREE AND... BRANCH... 1103 01:09:43,542 --> 01:09:45,333 OUT OF HERE. 1104 01:09:46,959 --> 01:09:49,166 [ Girl ] ALL RIGHT, KARA AND SARA ! 1105 01:09:49,166 --> 01:09:52,792 [ Principal ] NOW, IT IS TRADITIONAL FOR THE KING AND QUEEN... 1106 01:09:52,792 --> 01:09:54,792 TO SHARE A CEREMONIAL DANCE. 1107 01:09:54,792 --> 01:09:57,709 [ Crowd ] AWW ! COME HERE. I JUST WANNA-- 1108 01:09:57,709 --> 01:10:00,250 ♪ PUT YOUR HEADS ♪ 1109 01:10:00,250 --> 01:10:03,917 ♪ ON MY SHOULDER ♪ OHH ! 1110 01:10:03,917 --> 01:10:07,375 ♪ HOLD ME IN YOUR ARMS ♪ 1111 01:10:07,375 --> 01:10:10,000 YOU SMELL GOOD. ♪ BABY ♪ 1112 01:10:10,000 --> 01:10:13,000 ♪ SQUEEZE ME OH, SO TIGHT ♪ 1113 01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:16,041 ♪ AND SHOW ME ♪ 1114 01:10:16,041 --> 01:10:22,041 - [ Giggling ] - ♪ THAT YOU LOVE ME TOO ♪ 1115 01:10:22,041 --> 01:10:24,291 JANEY ! [ Squealing ] 1116 01:10:24,291 --> 01:10:28,208 ♪ PUT YOUR LIPS NEXT TO MINE, DEAR ♪♪ 1117 01:10:28,208 --> 01:10:30,458 MALIK, DO YOU KNOW WHERE AUSTIN WENT ? 1118 01:10:30,458 --> 01:10:33,458 ALL I KNOW IS THAT HE RENTED A ROOM AT THE SUNRISE MOTEL. 1119 01:10:33,458 --> 01:10:36,375 ROOM NUMBER SIX. IT’S THE ONE RIGHT PAST THE ICE DISPENSER. 1120 01:10:36,375 --> 01:10:40,083 IF YOU HIT THE PEPSI MACHINE, YOU WENT TOO FAR. 1121 01:10:40,083 --> 01:10:43,834 OH, AND THE DOOR WILL DEFINITELY NOT BE LOCKED. 1122 01:10:43,834 --> 01:10:45,959 THAT’S ALL I KNOW. 1123 01:10:45,959 --> 01:10:49,125 THANKS, MALIK. 1124 01:10:49,125 --> 01:10:52,709 YOU KNOW, YOU’RE AN INTELLIGENT, INSIGHTFUL HUMAN BEING... 1125 01:10:52,709 --> 01:10:55,500 WHO DOESN’T GET THE RESPECT AND ATTENTION THAT HE DESERVES. 1126 01:10:55,500 --> 01:10:59,417 WOW ! YOU REALLY MEAN THAT, JAKE ? 1127 01:10:59,417 --> 01:11:03,875 THAT’S GREAT, BECAUSE I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DISCUSS THE REPERCUSSIONS OF THE-- 1128 01:11:03,875 --> 01:11:05,875 I ACTUALLY GOTTA GO. SORRY. 1129 01:11:05,875 --> 01:11:07,792 MOTHERFUCKER. 1130 01:11:07,792 --> 01:11:09,834 HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, MISTER. 1131 01:11:09,834 --> 01:11:13,375 I AM NOT GOING TO LET YOU HURT JANEY AGAIN, OKAY ? 1132 01:11:13,375 --> 01:11:15,542 BESIDES, I LOVE HER. 1133 01:11:15,542 --> 01:11:17,875 WELL, SO DO I. 1134 01:11:17,875 --> 01:11:21,834 YES, BUT I’M THE BEST FRIEND AND I HAVE BEEN IN FRONT OF HER FACE THE WHOLE TIME. 1135 01:11:21,834 --> 01:11:26,875 SHE JUST-- SHE HASN’T REALLY REALIZED IT YET, BUT SHE WILL. 1136 01:11:26,875 --> 01:11:30,834 WELL, I’M THE REFORMED COOL GUY WHO’S LEARNED THE ERROR OF HIS WAYS. 1137 01:11:30,834 --> 01:11:34,458 SHE’S GONNA FORGIVE ME FOR MY MISTAKES AND REALIZE THAT I REALLY LOVE HER. 1138 01:11:35,917 --> 01:11:37,792 DAMN IT. THAT’S TRUE. 1139 01:11:52,458 --> 01:11:56,291 WHY IS THIS DOOR LOCKED ? THIS IS A FIRE HAZARD ! 1140 01:11:59,291 --> 01:12:01,458 ♪ WELL, JUST LOOK AT THAT GIRL ♪ 1141 01:12:01,458 --> 01:12:04,667 ♪ WITH THE LIGHTS COMING UP IN HER EYES ♪ 1142 01:12:04,667 --> 01:12:07,417 [ Horn Honks ] 1143 01:12:07,417 --> 01:12:10,458 ♪ SHE’S GOTTA BE SOMEBODY’S BABY ♪ 1144 01:12:10,458 --> 01:12:13,375 [ Horns Honking ] [ Woman ] GET OUT OF THE ROAD ! 1145 01:12:13,375 --> 01:12:15,583 [ Man ] WATCH IT, MAN ! 1146 01:12:15,583 --> 01:12:19,000 [ Woman ] SHE’S NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU ! 1147 01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:21,500 [ Man ] SHE DOESN’T LOVE YOU ! 1148 01:12:21,500 --> 01:12:25,083 [ Man ] AH, YOU’LL NEVER BE MORE THAN A FRIEND ! 1149 01:12:25,083 --> 01:12:27,417 ♪ SHE MUST BE SOMEBODY’S BABY ♪ TWO DOLLARS ! 1150 01:12:29,208 --> 01:12:32,375 ♪ SHE’S GOTTA BE SOMEBODY’S BABY ♪ 1151 01:12:32,375 --> 01:12:34,625 ♪ ’CAUSE SHE’S SO FINE ♪ 1152 01:12:34,625 --> 01:12:38,250 ♪ SHE’S PROBABLY SOMEBODY’S ONLY LIGHT ♪ ICE DISPENSER. 1153 01:12:38,250 --> 01:12:40,417 ♪ GONNA SHINE TONIGHT OH ♪ SIX. 1154 01:12:40,417 --> 01:12:42,959 [ Austin ] OH, YEAH ! [ Rhythmic Pounding ] 1155 01:12:42,959 --> 01:12:46,500 I’LL MAKE YOU FORGET ALL ABOUT LOSING PROM QUEEN. TELL ME WHO YOUR DADDY IS NOW ! 1156 01:12:46,500 --> 01:12:48,709 CAN YOU TELL ME WHO YOUR PAPA IS ? 1157 01:12:48,709 --> 01:12:51,125 WHOO-HOO-HOO ! 1158 01:12:51,125 --> 01:12:53,583 GET OFF HER, MAN. 1159 01:12:53,583 --> 01:12:56,458 - PRISCILLA. - DON’T MOVE. 1160 01:13:00,834 --> 01:13:04,166 - WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HERE ? - SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL. 1161 01:13:04,166 --> 01:13:06,000 - [ Snaps Fingers ] - WHERE’S JANEY ? 1162 01:13:06,000 --> 01:13:08,125 LITTLE MISS RUN HOME TO MY DADDY... 1163 01:13:08,125 --> 01:13:10,083 RAN HOME TO HER DADDY. 1164 01:13:10,083 --> 01:13:12,166 [ Laughing ] 1165 01:13:12,166 --> 01:13:14,709 THAT’S FOR TAKING JANEY TO THE PROM ! 1166 01:13:14,709 --> 01:13:18,041 - YOU PUT THE-- - THAT’S FOR HURTING JANEY AT PRESTON’S PARTY ! 1167 01:13:18,041 --> 01:13:21,125 THIS IS REALLY TURNING ME ON. 1168 01:13:21,125 --> 01:13:24,125 THAT’S FOR BEING REALLY WEIRD ! 1169 01:13:24,125 --> 01:13:25,959 THANK YOU. 1170 01:13:28,458 --> 01:13:30,375 [ Grunts ] 1171 01:13:30,375 --> 01:13:33,834 I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT WAS FOR. ♪ GONNA SHINE TONIGHT ♪ 1172 01:13:33,834 --> 01:13:39,166 ♪ MAKE HER MINE TONIGHT OH-OOH ♪ 1173 01:13:39,166 --> 01:13:43,333 ♪ GONNA SHINE TONIGHT MAKE HER MINE TONIGHT ♪♪ HELLO. 1174 01:13:43,333 --> 01:13:45,792 HI. [ Clears Throat ] 1175 01:13:45,792 --> 01:13:49,583 I NEVER THOUGHT I’D HEAR MYSELF SAY THIS, BUT... 1176 01:13:49,583 --> 01:13:52,417 FOR ONCE I WISH I COULD MEET... 1177 01:13:52,417 --> 01:13:55,250 A NICE, SENSITIVE GUY... 1178 01:13:55,250 --> 01:13:57,041 WHO WANTED MORE THAN JUST SEX. 1179 01:13:59,542 --> 01:14:02,333 THAT IS VERY ADMIRABLE. 1180 01:14:05,083 --> 01:14:08,041 FOR ONCE, I WISH A GUY WOULD TAKE ME OUT FOR DINNER. 1181 01:14:08,041 --> 01:14:10,291 I FEEL THE SAME WAY. 1182 01:14:10,291 --> 01:14:12,375 [ Sighs ] 1183 01:14:12,375 --> 01:14:14,208 AND FOR ONCE, 1184 01:14:16,041 --> 01:14:19,375 I WISH A GUY WOULD TAKE A DUMP ON MY CHEST. 1185 01:14:22,458 --> 01:14:24,375 THAT IS APPALLING. 1186 01:14:26,166 --> 01:14:28,583 [ Disgusted Grunt ] 1187 01:14:28,583 --> 01:14:32,041 THAT REALLY UPSETS ME. 1188 01:14:32,041 --> 01:14:34,625 I CAN’T BELIEVE NOBODY’S EVER TAKEN A DUMP ON YOUR CHEST. 1189 01:14:39,083 --> 01:14:41,417 WILL YOU BE THAT GUY ? 1190 01:14:48,041 --> 01:14:52,000 IT WOULD BE AN HONOR AND A PRIVILEGE. 1191 01:15:00,625 --> 01:15:02,625 [ Glass Shattering ] 1192 01:15:02,625 --> 01:15:04,458 JANEY ! 1193 01:15:07,291 --> 01:15:09,500 HELLO ? 1194 01:15:09,500 --> 01:15:11,667 IS ANYBODY HOME ? [ Cans Clattering ] 1195 01:15:11,667 --> 01:15:14,000 GET DOWN ! ENEMY FIRE ! 1196 01:15:14,000 --> 01:15:16,667 UH-- UH, MR. BRIGGS ? 1197 01:15:16,667 --> 01:15:19,625 MR. BRIGGS, EXCUSE ME, SIR. 1198 01:15:19,625 --> 01:15:23,500 DO YOU KNOW WHERE JANEY IS ? SHE WENT OUT THERE ON HER OWN. 1199 01:15:23,500 --> 01:15:25,750 THERE’S CHARLIE EVERYWHERE. 1200 01:15:25,750 --> 01:15:28,625 RIGHT. DO YOU KNOW WHERE SHE WENT ? 1201 01:15:28,625 --> 01:15:31,500 COULDN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE. WENT TO THE AIRPORT. 1202 01:15:31,500 --> 01:15:34,500 SOMETHIN’ ABOUT... PARIS. 1203 01:15:34,500 --> 01:15:36,667 HER TOUR IS OVER. 1204 01:15:36,667 --> 01:15:39,083 PARIS. THANK YOU, SIR. 1205 01:15:39,083 --> 01:15:43,000 I NEED AMMO ! I CAN’T HOLD ’EM OFF MUCH LONGER ! 1206 01:15:43,000 --> 01:15:46,625 ♪ EVERY TIME I THINK OF YOU ♪ 1207 01:15:46,625 --> 01:15:49,125 ♪ I FEEL SHOT RIGHT THROUGH WITH A BOLT OF BLUE ♪ 1208 01:15:49,125 --> 01:15:51,959 [ Man ] OFF THE ROAD, YOU GLASSES-AND-PONYTAIL FREAK ! 1209 01:15:51,959 --> 01:15:54,792 ♪ IT’S A PROBLEM I FIND ♪ 1210 01:15:54,792 --> 01:15:58,709 ♪ LIVING LIFE THAT I CAN’T LEAVE BEHIND ♪ 1211 01:15:58,709 --> 01:16:02,667 ♪ EVERY TIME I SEE YOU FALLING ♪ 1212 01:16:02,667 --> 01:16:06,333 ♪ I GET DOWN ON MY KNEES AND PRAY ♪♪ TWO DOLLARS ! 1213 01:16:06,333 --> 01:16:08,709 TWO DOLLARS ! TWO DOLLARS ! 1214 01:16:08,709 --> 01:16:11,542 [ Bell Dinging ] TWO DOLLARS ! 1215 01:16:11,542 --> 01:16:13,291 [ Grunting ] 1216 01:16:14,709 --> 01:16:17,208 [ Bus Driver ] NEXT STOP, AIRPORT. 1217 01:16:17,208 --> 01:16:19,709 [ Man On P.A. ] THE RED ZONE IS FOR THE IMMEDIATE LOADING... 1218 01:16:19,709 --> 01:16:22,000 AND UNLOADING OF PASSENGERS ONLY. 1219 01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:24,500 NO PARKING. 1220 01:16:24,500 --> 01:16:28,959 [ Woman On P.A. ] ATTENTION: ALL 1986 RED PORSCHE 944s PARKED IN THE WHITE ZONE... 1221 01:16:28,959 --> 01:16:31,583 WILL BE TOWED IMMEDIATELY. 1222 01:16:35,709 --> 01:16:39,500 [ Woman On P.A. ] PARIS AIR FLIGHT 805 TO ART SCHOOL IN PARIS... 1223 01:16:39,500 --> 01:16:43,291 FROM GATE 122 IS NOW BOARDING. 1224 01:16:46,709 --> 01:16:50,166 [ Man On P.A. Speaking German ] 1225 01:16:55,375 --> 01:16:58,166 EXCUSE ME, EVERYONE ! 1226 01:16:58,166 --> 01:17:01,250 THERE’S A GIRL BOARDING A PLANE RIGHT NOW TO PARIS... 1227 01:17:01,250 --> 01:17:03,834 THAT I LOVE. 1228 01:17:03,834 --> 01:17:07,625 AND IF I DON’T GET THERE IN TIME AND TELL HER HOW I REALLY FEEL, 1229 01:17:07,625 --> 01:17:09,417 I MAY NEVER SEE HER AGAIN. 1230 01:17:14,417 --> 01:17:16,583 GO GET HER, SON. 1231 01:17:16,583 --> 01:17:19,750 GOOD LUCK, YOUNG MAN. 1232 01:17:19,750 --> 01:17:23,083 GO GET HER ! 1233 01:17:23,083 --> 01:17:26,125 [ Detector Beeping ] OH, HELL. JUST GO. 1234 01:17:28,000 --> 01:17:30,166 [ Beeping ] FREEZE, BITCH ! 1235 01:17:30,166 --> 01:17:33,625 [ Woman On P.A. Speaking Spanish ] 1236 01:17:40,875 --> 01:17:43,417 [ Woman ] YOU’RE BLEEDING ON MY SUITCASE. 1237 01:17:45,750 --> 01:17:47,667 [ Bone Cracking ] 1238 01:17:49,792 --> 01:17:53,375 EXCUSE ME ! EXCUSE ME, EVERYONE ! 1239 01:17:53,375 --> 01:17:57,667 THERE’S A GIRL ABOUT TO BOARD A PLANE TO PARIS RIGHT NOW... 1240 01:17:57,667 --> 01:18:00,333 THAT I LOVE, AND-- 1241 01:18:00,333 --> 01:18:03,041 WE ALREADY HEARD THAT ONE, ASSHOLE. 1242 01:18:05,625 --> 01:18:08,667 [ Woman On P.A. ] FINAL BOARDING CALL FOR PARIS AIR FLIGHT 805... 1243 01:18:08,667 --> 01:18:12,458 TO ART SCHOOL IN PARIS, DEPARTING FROM GATE 122. 1244 01:18:12,458 --> 01:18:15,000 JANEY ! 1245 01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:19,083 HEY, SHITHEAD, THAT’S MINE ! COME ON. GIVE IT BACK. 1246 01:18:19,083 --> 01:18:21,250 JUST BELIEVE IN THE BALL, JAKE, 1247 01:18:21,250 --> 01:18:23,583 AND THROW YOURSELF. 1248 01:18:23,583 --> 01:18:26,041 [ Grunts ] YEAH. 1249 01:18:32,834 --> 01:18:36,125 - [ Groans ] - YES ! 1250 01:18:36,125 --> 01:18:37,959 NICE SHOT, JAKE. 1251 01:18:37,959 --> 01:18:40,000 [ Grunts ] OW. 1252 01:18:40,000 --> 01:18:41,917 JAKE ? JANEY. 1253 01:18:41,917 --> 01:18:44,250 THANK GOD I GOT TO YOU IN TIME. LISTEN TO ME. 1254 01:18:44,250 --> 01:18:46,917 I’M NOT GONNA LET YOU GET ON THIS PLANE AND GO TO PARIS. 1255 01:18:46,917 --> 01:18:50,291 THIS IS THE FINAL BOARDING CALL FOR FLIGHT 805, WELL, WHY NOT ? 1256 01:18:50,291 --> 01:18:52,834 NONSTOP TO ART SCHOOL IN PARIS. 1257 01:18:52,834 --> 01:18:56,000 SO IF YOU’RE TRYING TO FIND THE WORDS TO STOP A GIRL FROM LEAVING, 1258 01:18:56,000 --> 01:18:59,041 NOW WOULD BE THE TIME. JANEY. 1259 01:19:01,792 --> 01:19:06,709 I MADE THAT BET BEFORE I KNEW YOU, 1260 01:19:06,709 --> 01:19:09,000 BEFORE I REALLY KNEW ME. 1261 01:19:10,792 --> 01:19:13,834 OH, JAKE. 1262 01:19:13,834 --> 01:19:17,583 [ Woman On P.A. ] OKAY, HOLD IT RIGHT THERE. 1263 01:19:20,000 --> 01:19:23,375 PLEASE TELL ME THAT YOU DIDN’T JUST QUOTE FREDDIE PRINZE, JR. 1264 01:19:25,333 --> 01:19:29,250 I KNEW IT. THAT WAS A LINE FROM SHE’S ALL THAT. 1265 01:19:29,250 --> 01:19:31,667 I MASTURBATE TO THAT MOVIE. 1266 01:19:34,083 --> 01:19:36,959 UH, DO YOU MIND ? 1267 01:19:36,959 --> 01:19:39,458 NO, NOT AT ALL. I THINK MASTURBATION’S VERY HEALTHY. 1268 01:19:42,458 --> 01:19:44,667 JANEY, 1269 01:19:44,667 --> 01:19:48,500 YOU TOLD ME YOU COULDN’T BELIEVE IN SOMEONE THAT DIDN’T BELIEVE IN YOU. 1270 01:19:48,500 --> 01:19:52,709 WELL, I BELIEVED IN YOU. I ALWAYS BELIEVED IN YOU. 1271 01:19:52,709 --> 01:19:54,959 OH, JAKE. 1272 01:19:54,959 --> 01:19:57,083 [ Woman On P.A. ] OH, GOD. 1273 01:19:57,083 --> 01:19:59,625 I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT CRAP. 1274 01:19:59,625 --> 01:20:02,417 - THAT’S FROM PRETTY IN PINK. - ARE YOU SURE ? 1275 01:20:02,417 --> 01:20:06,166 - TRUST ME. - EXCUSE ME. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 1276 01:20:06,166 --> 01:20:09,709 LET ME GIVE YOU A LITTLE PIECE OF ADVICE HERE, JAKE. 1277 01:20:09,709 --> 01:20:13,917 LOSE THE "I’M THE CUTE AND SENSITIVE, POPULAR BOY WITH THE BIG SIDEBURNS" ROUTINE. 1278 01:20:13,917 --> 01:20:18,792 IT’S JUST TOO PATHETIC. AND FOR ONCE, TELL JANEY WHAT’S TRUE IN YOUR HEART. 1279 01:20:18,792 --> 01:20:21,625 STOP BEING SUCH A LITTLE BITCH. 1280 01:20:21,625 --> 01:20:24,166 AND YOU, JANEY, LITTLE MISS OTHER SIDE OF THE TRACKS, 1281 01:20:24,166 --> 01:20:26,667 AWKWARD REBEL GIRL WITH THE PSEUDO-INTELLECTUAL GLASSES, 1282 01:20:26,667 --> 01:20:29,333 WHY DON’T YOU WISE UP TO JAKE’S BULLSHIT ? 1283 01:20:29,333 --> 01:20:31,417 STOP BEING SUCH A DUMB-ASS. 1284 01:20:34,917 --> 01:20:37,041 SHE’S RIGHT. 1285 01:20:37,041 --> 01:20:39,417 JANEY ? YES, JAKE ? 1286 01:20:41,959 --> 01:20:44,875 MAYBE YOU SHOULD GET ON THAT PLANE AND GO TO PARIS. 1287 01:20:44,875 --> 01:20:46,834 HUH ? 1288 01:20:46,834 --> 01:20:51,000 WELL, I MEAN, IF YOU STAY, WE REALLY ONLY HAVE THE SUMMER. 1289 01:20:51,000 --> 01:20:53,625 THEN I GO TO COLLEGE, AND WE’LL TALK ON THE PHONE... 1290 01:20:53,625 --> 01:20:57,208 AND SPEND THE OCCASIONAL WEEKEND TOGETHER, WHICH IS NICE. 1291 01:20:57,208 --> 01:21:01,583 BUT CHANCES ARE, I’M GONNA GET WRECKED AND HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX WITH SOME GIRL IN MY DORM. 1292 01:21:01,583 --> 01:21:04,000 YOU’LL FIND HER THONG AND CALL ME A SLUT. 1293 01:21:04,000 --> 01:21:07,500 I’LL CALL YOU A COCK TEASE, AND WE’LL BREAK UP. 1294 01:21:07,500 --> 01:21:11,333 SO WHEN YOU REALLY THINK ABOUT IT, WHAT’S THE POINT ? 1295 01:21:14,291 --> 01:21:19,583 WELL, THAT... WASN’T EXACTLY THE KIND OF TRUTH I WAS EXPECTING. 1296 01:21:21,333 --> 01:21:24,041 THAT DOESN’T MEAN I’M GONNA FALL FOR IT. 1297 01:21:24,041 --> 01:21:27,166 I MEAN, HOW BIG OF A DUMB-ASS DO YOU THINK I AM ? 1298 01:21:27,166 --> 01:21:29,583 YOU OBVIOUSLY STOLE THAT SPEECH FROM KARATE KID. 1299 01:21:29,583 --> 01:21:32,000 NO, ACTUALLY, I-- SHH. 1300 01:21:32,000 --> 01:21:35,000 JAKE, IT’S OKAY. 1301 01:21:35,000 --> 01:21:37,041 I LOVE YOU TOO. 1302 01:21:37,041 --> 01:21:40,000 WE ALL KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING. 1303 01:21:40,000 --> 01:21:42,083 FUCKING TEENAGERS. 1304 01:21:43,375 --> 01:21:48,000 [ Crowd ] AWW ! 1305 01:21:50,792 --> 01:21:53,625 THIS IS IT-- THE RIGHT MOMENT. 1306 01:21:53,625 --> 01:21:56,458 ♪ MOVING FORWARD USING ALL MY BREATH ♪ 1307 01:21:56,458 --> 01:21:58,709 [ One Person Clapping Slowly ] 1308 01:21:58,709 --> 01:22:03,208 ♪ MAKING LOVE TO YOU WAS NEVER SECOND BEST ♪ 1309 01:22:03,208 --> 01:22:06,542 ♪ I SAW THE WORLD THRASHING ALL AROUND YOUR FACE ♪ 1310 01:22:06,542 --> 01:22:08,834 [ Hysterical Sobbing ] 1311 01:22:08,834 --> 01:22:12,375 ♪ NEVER REALLY KNOWING IT WAS ALWAYS MESH AND LACE ♪ SON OF A BITCH ! 1312 01:22:17,041 --> 01:22:20,000 ♪ I’LL STOP THE WORLD AND MELT WITH YOU ♪ 1313 01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:22,041 ♪ I’LL STOP THE WORLD AND MELT WITH YOU ♪ 1314 01:22:22,041 --> 01:22:24,875 ♪ I’LL STOP THE WORLD AND MELT WITH YOU ♪ 1315 01:22:24,875 --> 01:22:28,375 ♪ I’LL STOP THE WORLD AND MELT WITH YOU ♪ 1316 01:22:28,375 --> 01:22:32,041 [ Briggs ] OHH, BETTY, 1317 01:22:32,041 --> 01:22:34,458 MEET APOLLONIA. 1318 01:22:34,458 --> 01:22:37,041 WE’RE GONNA HAVE A THREE-WAY. 1319 01:22:37,041 --> 01:22:39,542 [ Panting ] AHH ! 1320 01:22:39,542 --> 01:22:41,917 [ Hysterical Laughter ] 1321 01:22:41,917 --> 01:22:54,500 ♪♪ 1322 01:22:57,083 --> 01:23:00,750 ♪ HEY, HEY HEY, HEY ♪ 1323 01:23:00,750 --> 01:23:05,917 ♪ WHOO-HOO, OOH-OHH ♪ 1324 01:23:12,750 --> 01:23:16,250 ♪ WON’T YOU COME SEE ABOUT ME ♪ 1325 01:23:16,250 --> 01:23:21,583 ♪ I’LL BE ALONE, DANCING YOU KNOW IT, BABY ♪ 1326 01:23:21,583 --> 01:23:25,125 ♪ TELL ME YOUR TROUBLES AND DOUBTS ♪ 1327 01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:29,000 ♪ GIVIN’ ME EVERYTHING INSIDE AND OUT ♪ 1328 01:23:29,000 --> 01:23:31,375 ♪ AND LOVE’S STRANGE ♪ 1329 01:23:31,375 --> 01:23:33,917 ♪ SO REAL IN THE DARK ♪ 1330 01:23:33,917 --> 01:23:38,417 ♪ THINK OF THE TENDER THINGS THAT WE WERE WORKING ON ♪ 1331 01:23:38,417 --> 01:23:42,917 ♪ SLOW CHANGE MAY PULL US APART ♪ 1332 01:23:42,917 --> 01:23:47,208 ♪ WHEN THE LIGHT GETS INTO YOUR HEART, BABY ♪ 1333 01:23:47,208 --> 01:23:52,417 ♪ DON’T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME ♪ 1334 01:23:52,417 --> 01:23:55,959 ♪ SAID DON’T, DON’T DON’T, DON’T ♪ 1335 01:23:55,959 --> 01:24:00,083 ♪ DON’T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME ♪ 1336 01:24:03,625 --> 01:24:08,250 ♪ SAID WILL YOU STAND ABOVE ME ♪ 1337 01:24:08,250 --> 01:24:10,500 ♪ LOOK MY WAY ♪ 1338 01:24:10,500 --> 01:24:12,792 ♪ NEVER LOVE ME ♪ 1339 01:24:12,792 --> 01:24:17,375 ♪ RAIN KEEPS FALLING THE RAIN KEEPS FALLING ♪ 1340 01:24:17,375 --> 01:24:21,166 ♪ DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪ 1341 01:24:21,166 --> 01:24:25,625 ♪ SAID WILL YOU RECOGNIZE ME ♪ 1342 01:24:25,625 --> 01:24:30,166 ♪ CALL MY NAME OR WALK ON BY ♪ 1343 01:24:30,166 --> 01:24:34,792 ♪ THE RAIN KEEPS FALLING RAIN KEEPS FALLING ♪ 1344 01:24:34,792 --> 01:24:38,709 ♪ DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪ 1345 01:24:41,166 --> 01:24:44,500 ♪ HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY ♪ 1346 01:24:44,500 --> 01:24:47,417 ♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪ 1347 01:24:47,417 --> 01:24:50,291 ♪ OOH-OHH ♪ 1348 01:24:56,542 --> 01:25:00,333 ♪ DON’T YOU TRY TO PRETEND ♪ 1349 01:25:00,333 --> 01:25:05,166 ♪ IT’S MY FEELING WE’LL WIN IN THE END ♪ 1350 01:25:05,166 --> 01:25:09,166 ♪ I WON’T HARM YOUR DEFENSES ♪ 1351 01:25:09,166 --> 01:25:12,583 ♪ VANITY, INSECURITY ♪ 1352 01:25:12,583 --> 01:25:17,458 ♪ AH, NOW DON’T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME ♪ 1353 01:25:17,458 --> 01:25:22,417 ♪ SAID I’LL BE ALONE, DANCING YOU KNOW IT, BABY ♪ 1354 01:25:22,417 --> 01:25:26,583 ♪ GOING TO TAKE YOU APART ♪ 1355 01:25:26,583 --> 01:25:31,208 ♪ I’LL PUT US BACK TOGETHER AT HEART, BABY ♪ 1356 01:25:31,208 --> 01:25:33,750 ♪ DON’T YOU ♪ 1357 01:25:33,750 --> 01:25:37,041 ♪ FORGET ABOUT ME ♪ 1358 01:25:37,041 --> 01:25:39,792 ♪ SAID DON’T, DON’T DON’T, DON’T ♪ 1359 01:25:39,792 --> 01:25:42,291 ♪ DON’T YOU ♪ 1360 01:25:42,291 --> 01:25:46,250 ♪ FORGET ABOUT ME ♪ 1361 01:25:46,250 --> 01:25:50,625 ♪ AS YOU WALK ON BY ♪ 1362 01:25:50,625 --> 01:25:54,875 ♪ WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ 1363 01:25:54,875 --> 01:25:59,291 ♪ AS YOU WALK ON BY ♪ 1364 01:25:59,291 --> 01:26:03,500 ♪ WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ 1365 01:26:03,500 --> 01:26:07,500 ♪ WHEN YOU WALK AWAY ♪ 1366 01:26:12,250 --> 01:26:15,125 ♪ WILL YOU WALK AWAY ♪ 1367 01:26:20,834 --> 01:26:23,750 ♪ WILL YOU WALK ON BY ♪ 1368 01:26:25,250 --> 01:26:28,166 ♪ AND WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ 1369 01:26:29,458 --> 01:26:32,542 ♪ SAID WILL YOU WALK ON BY ♪ 1370 01:26:33,917 --> 01:26:37,166 ♪ AND WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ 1371 01:26:39,166 --> 01:26:43,250 ♪ I SAID LA, LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1372 01:26:43,250 --> 01:26:45,333 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1373 01:26:45,333 --> 01:26:49,709 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1374 01:26:49,709 --> 01:26:54,041 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1375 01:26:54,041 --> 01:26:57,834 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1376 01:26:57,834 --> 01:27:00,542 ♪ WILL YOU WALK ON BY ♪ 1377 01:27:00,542 --> 01:27:06,375 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ ♪ WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ 1378 01:27:06,375 --> 01:27:09,291 ♪ WHEN YOU WALK ON BY ♪ ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1379 01:27:09,291 --> 01:27:11,750 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA ♪ 1380 01:27:11,750 --> 01:27:19,208 ♪ WILL YOU CALL MY NAME ♪ ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA ♪♪ 1381 01:27:23,083 --> 01:27:27,208 ♪ WELL, IT STARTED OUT WHEN WE WERE VERY YOUNG ♪ 1382 01:27:29,583 --> 01:27:33,500 ♪ SCHOOLYARD KIDS ON THE PROWL JUST HAVING FUN ♪ 1383 01:27:36,000 --> 01:27:42,542 ♪ SMOKIN’ CIGARETTES AND TRYIN’ TO BUY SOME BEER ♪ 1384 01:27:42,542 --> 01:27:47,208 ♪ THE 8 BEFORE 21 THOSE WERE THE YEARS ♪ 1385 01:27:48,834 --> 01:27:53,709 ♪ ’CAUSE AFTER ALL WE ARE ♪ 1386 01:27:53,709 --> 01:27:57,250 ♪ WE ARE ALL FRIENDS ♪ 1387 01:28:01,750 --> 01:28:06,375 ♪ ’CAUSE AFTER ALL WE ARE ♪ 1388 01:28:06,375 --> 01:28:09,542 ♪ WE ARE ALL FRIENDS ♪ 1389 01:28:11,041 --> 01:28:14,000 ♪ ’CAUSE YOU’RE ALWAYS THERE ♪ 1390 01:28:14,000 --> 01:28:17,250 ♪ AND IT’S ALWAYS RIGHT ♪ 1391 01:28:17,250 --> 01:28:20,375 ♪ AND IT’S ALWAYS BEEN ♪ 1392 01:28:20,375 --> 01:28:24,834 ♪ AND YOU’RE ALWAYS THERE RIGHT ON ♪ 1393 01:28:33,792 --> 01:28:39,709 ♪ AFTER ALL WE ARE WE ARE ALL FRIENDS ♪♪ [ Cheering ] 1394 01:28:39,709 --> 01:28:43,583 ♪ SUN’S BURNED MY CORNEA ♪ 1395 01:28:43,583 --> 01:28:47,667 ♪ I CAN NO LONGER SEE-EE-EE ♪ 1396 01:28:47,667 --> 01:28:52,291 ♪ I’M NOT KIDDING SOMEBODY, PLEASE FUCKING HELP ME ♪♪ 1397 01:28:55,917 --> 01:28:58,000 [ Man ] QUICK, GRAB HER GUITAR. 109146

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