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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:20,934 --> 00:02:23,503 'Who had never dreamed of knowing heaven on earth, 2 00:02:23,636 --> 00:02:26,343 'of sailing away to a desert island? 3 00:02:26,472 --> 00:02:29,589 'Well, here's a story about such a dream come true. 4 00:02:29,725 --> 00:02:32,011 'A story that starts in London, at tea time. 5 00:02:32,144 --> 00:02:35,602 'Which is not surprising since it's always tea time in London. 6 00:02:35,731 --> 00:02:38,894 'On this particular day, at the house of The Honourable Mr Bramwell...’ 7 00:02:42,488 --> 00:02:44,319 Your tea, Mr Bramwell. 8 00:02:46,742 --> 00:02:49,700 The heir from America is waiting outside. 9 00:02:49,829 --> 00:02:51,285 The heir from America? 10 00:02:51,414 --> 00:02:53,905 Oh, we can't keep him waiting. Eh, gentlemen? 11 00:02:54,041 --> 00:02:57,078 Well, don't stand there gaping, Pringle. Show him in, immediately. 12 00:02:59,338 --> 00:03:01,374 Will you go in now? 13 00:03:13,644 --> 00:03:16,351 - Mr Laurel, I presume. - No, no, I'm Oliver Hardy. 14 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:18,266 I'm Mr Laurel's financial exchequer. 15 00:03:18,774 --> 00:03:21,891 - But where is Mr Laurel? - Oh, right here. Mr Laurel is... 16 00:03:22,028 --> 00:03:25,691 Ah, Mr Laurel, we've had quite a time finding you. 17 00:03:27,825 --> 00:03:30,362 And now, gentlemen, let me introduce the two attorneys 18 00:03:30,494 --> 00:03:34,078 who handled your late uncle's affairs in France and in Italy. 19 00:03:34,206 --> 00:03:37,039 Mr Hardy, Monsieur Bonfois. Mr Laurel, Signor Paltroni. 20 00:03:37,168 --> 00:03:38,374 How do you do? 21 00:03:38,502 --> 00:03:41,414 Signor Paltroni, Mr Hardy. Mr Bonfois, Mr Laurel. 22 00:03:41,547 --> 00:03:42,787 My name is Bramwell. 23 00:03:44,050 --> 00:03:45,881 Mr Hardy! 24 00:03:49,764 --> 00:03:53,507 Well, gentlemen, could we get down to business? 25 00:03:53,643 --> 00:03:55,804 Oh, thank you, Stanley. 26 00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:58,052 Now, just how much was this legacy? 27 00:03:58,189 --> 00:04:02,228 Oh, you Americans! You never seem to believe in formalities, do you? 28 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:05,102 There's one thing about us. 29 00:04:05,237 --> 00:04:08,946 We always believe in business before pleasure. 30 00:04:09,075 --> 00:04:10,565 You see... 31 00:04:37,687 --> 00:04:39,518 Pardon me. 32 00:04:45,569 --> 00:04:47,525 Thank you very much. 33 00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:55,234 Now, could we proceed? 34 00:04:55,371 --> 00:04:58,613 As a matter of fact, we had better get right to business. 35 00:04:59,959 --> 00:05:02,450 Your uncle was quite an eccentric. 36 00:05:02,586 --> 00:05:06,124 He didn't believe in banks. 37 00:05:06,757 --> 00:05:09,169 He insisted on keeping his money in cash. 38 00:05:10,970 --> 00:05:13,256 - And here it is. - What is it? 39 00:05:13,389 --> 00:05:15,471 It's money, I think. 40 00:05:15,599 --> 00:05:19,262 Indeed, it is money, and a very large sum. 41 00:05:19,395 --> 00:05:22,228 - Italian lira. - French francs. 42 00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:24,062 And English pounds. 43 00:05:24,191 --> 00:05:25,681 Stanley... 44 00:05:26,235 --> 00:05:29,318 Mr Laurel, before we actually turn this money over to you, 45 00:05:29,447 --> 00:05:32,154 there are, of course, some administrative charges. 46 00:05:32,283 --> 00:05:34,649 These include overhead legal charges... 47 00:05:34,785 --> 00:05:36,616 Deflation, amortisation... 48 00:05:36,746 --> 00:05:42,286 Currency fluctuation, foreign exchange and a few other incidentals. 49 00:05:42,418 --> 00:05:43,954 Gentlemen! 50 00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:55,211 Here's your receipt, Mr Laurel. 51 00:05:59,143 --> 00:06:00,223 Well, gentlemen... 52 00:06:00,352 --> 00:06:03,435 My dear Mr Hardy, there is another small item. 53 00:06:03,564 --> 00:06:05,646 - What now? - The taxes. 54 00:06:05,775 --> 00:06:08,642 To save you time, we've had them all figured out. 55 00:06:08,778 --> 00:06:12,521 lncluding, naturally, a slight fee for our services. 56 00:06:12,656 --> 00:06:18,401 These deductions represent income taxes, state taxes, inheritance taxes, 57 00:06:18,537 --> 00:06:21,449 death taxes and living taxes. 58 00:06:21,582 --> 00:06:23,994 And a few other plain taxes. 59 00:06:24,126 --> 00:06:25,582 Gentlemen... 60 00:06:36,639 --> 00:06:39,176 Wish Uncle had left me the taxes! 61 00:06:40,059 --> 00:06:41,549 Is that all we get? 62 00:06:42,728 --> 00:06:45,561 Oh, but you also get an island! 63 00:06:45,689 --> 00:06:48,806 - An island? - And a beautiful yacht. 64 00:06:48,943 --> 00:06:50,524 - A yacht? - Yes, yes. 65 00:06:50,653 --> 00:06:54,942 The yacht is tied to a dock right here, see? In Marseilles, France. 66 00:06:55,074 --> 00:06:57,531 And the island is here, in the South Seas. 67 00:06:57,660 --> 00:06:59,616 Gee, that sounds wonderful, Ollie! 68 00:06:59,745 --> 00:07:02,703 Well, that sounds swell, but... 69 00:07:02,832 --> 00:07:04,572 How much are the taxes on that? 70 00:07:04,708 --> 00:07:08,121 Oh, none. The island is absolutely tax free! 71 00:07:08,254 --> 00:07:10,245 - Here's your money. - The papers for the boat. 72 00:07:10,381 --> 00:07:12,713 And this is the deed to the island. 73 00:07:12,842 --> 00:07:16,710 Well, now, that cleans out, er... I mean, that cleans up the estate. 74 00:07:16,846 --> 00:07:19,007 Gentlemen, I bid you good day. 75 00:07:19,139 --> 00:07:21,255 Come, Stanley. 76 00:07:25,604 --> 00:07:28,016 Why don't you be careful? 77 00:07:39,034 --> 00:07:41,150 Take a look. Here's your little boat, gentlemen. 78 00:07:48,836 --> 00:07:51,043 - And here's your port clearance. - Ah! 79 00:07:51,171 --> 00:07:52,786 Boy, we'll need a crew for this one. 80 00:07:52,923 --> 00:07:54,788 A crew? What do we need a crew for? 81 00:07:54,925 --> 00:07:57,337 - I'm running this boat! - Well, let's get on it. 82 00:07:57,469 --> 00:08:00,211 - Oh, I beg your pardon. Dock fees. - How much? 83 00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:02,383 - 19,000. - Lovely! 84 00:08:03,642 --> 00:08:05,803 Thank you, sir, and [90/7 voyage. 85 00:08:05,936 --> 00:08:07,301 - Merc/ beaucoup. - Good day. 86 00:08:07,438 --> 00:08:09,394 - Bon tomorrow! - Thank you. 87 00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:13,391 It's a good thing he didn't take the taxes. We'd have had nothing left of that. 88 00:08:13,527 --> 00:08:17,270 Pardon me. Thanks a lot for reminding me. I forgot about it. 89 00:08:17,406 --> 00:08:19,362 - Thanks. - Er, Monsieur... 90 00:08:23,245 --> 00:08:26,408 Thank you. It's much too much, sir. Much too much. 91 00:08:27,750 --> 00:08:29,911 What did you have to open your big mouth for? 92 00:08:30,044 --> 00:08:34,834 - Well, I didn't know he was going to take it. - Come on and let's take a look at the boat. 93 00:09:19,510 --> 00:09:21,375 We've got plenty of gas! 94 00:09:27,518 --> 00:09:29,224 Let that thing alone! 95 00:09:36,944 --> 00:09:38,684 Put that down! 96 00:09:38,821 --> 00:09:41,278 - Look, there’s a tunnel. - Look. 97 00:09:42,491 --> 00:09:45,107 See? Let's go down. 98 00:10:02,052 --> 00:10:05,044 - Why don't you watch where you're walking? - Well, I couldn't help it. 99 00:10:05,180 --> 00:10:08,513 Oh, never mind that. Let's see what we've got here. 100 00:10:32,249 --> 00:10:33,830 Shh! 101 00:10:35,919 --> 00:10:38,911 - I didn't know they were living underneath. - Well, they've moved now! 102 00:10:41,967 --> 00:10:45,130 - What'd he say? - I wouldn't care to repeat it. 103 00:10:45,262 --> 00:10:47,423 Come on! 104 00:11:07,576 --> 00:11:10,613 - What happened? - Mind your own business! 105 00:11:13,999 --> 00:11:15,034 Oh, look! 106 00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:18,826 What is it? 107 00:11:18,962 --> 00:11:21,669 Well, that's an emergency life raft for four people. 108 00:11:21,799 --> 00:11:25,587 - You can't get four people into this thing! - You don't understand. 109 00:11:25,719 --> 00:11:28,301 lnside there's a compressed air cylinder. 110 00:11:28,430 --> 00:11:33,015 When you release the valve, it blows up large enough to carry four people. 111 00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:37,598 Well, what about me? 112 00:11:37,731 --> 00:11:40,063 You don't have to be insulting. 113 00:11:41,026 --> 00:11:43,267 Haven't I always taken care of you? 114 00:11:44,988 --> 00:11:47,400 You're the first one I'd think of. 115 00:11:49,576 --> 00:11:52,158 I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, Ollie. 116 00:11:54,289 --> 00:11:55,699 Ollie. 117 00:11:57,835 --> 00:11:59,541 Ollie. 118 00:12:00,462 --> 00:12:01,497 Yoo-hoo! 119 00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:18,185 Take that snake skin off and get that cargo aboard! 120 00:12:19,148 --> 00:12:21,059 "What about me"... 121 00:12:21,191 --> 00:12:23,022 What about me? 122 00:12:45,674 --> 00:12:49,713 Don't waste time like that. Throw them to me and I'll put them there. 123 00:14:01,667 --> 00:14:03,203 Look at that! 124 00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:09,163 - What goes on here? - There's a man in the cage! 125 00:14:12,219 --> 00:14:14,505 - I bet it's Antoine again. - But the guy must be mad. 126 00:14:15,013 --> 00:14:16,344 I'm a monkey, I tell you! 127 00:14:16,473 --> 00:14:18,429 - He's a stateless man. - A what? 128 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:20,219 Somebody who has no nationality. 129 00:14:20,352 --> 00:14:24,186 Oh, he's not a bad guy, really. But no country seems to want him. 130 00:14:24,314 --> 00:14:27,431 He'd do anything to get back on land. Let's go, Antoine. 131 00:14:30,988 --> 00:14:33,900 Don't you know it's against the law to land here without a passport? 132 00:14:34,032 --> 00:14:38,492 Arrest me, punish me, teach me a lesson, put me in prison! 133 00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:42,078 But remember that to put me in prison you've got to let me land. 134 00:14:42,207 --> 00:14:44,198 How long has he been on your ship, Captain? 135 00:14:44,334 --> 00:14:45,699 Oh, months. 136 00:14:45,836 --> 00:14:51,297 He tried to get ashore at Tetrokovac, Nagasaki, Caracas, Sydney... 137 00:14:51,425 --> 00:14:53,791 - Brooklyn. - Brooklyn, Salonika... 138 00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:55,167 Everywhere we stopped. 139 00:14:55,304 --> 00:14:59,638 - All I ask for is a country. - Well, get a passport. 140 00:14:59,766 --> 00:15:01,631 Oh, that's easy to say. 141 00:15:01,768 --> 00:15:04,680 How can I get a passport if I have no country? 142 00:15:04,813 --> 00:15:07,850 And how can I get in the country if I have no passport? 143 00:15:07,983 --> 00:15:09,564 Sorry, I didn't make the regulations. 144 00:15:09,693 --> 00:15:12,059 You're not allowed to land in this country. That's the law! 145 00:15:12,195 --> 00:15:13,651 Fine laws! 146 00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:17,068 You land monkeys without a passport, and not human beings! 147 00:15:19,286 --> 00:15:21,242 Take him back on board. 148 00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:25,242 Let's go! 149 00:15:25,375 --> 00:15:28,663 - Canned food, one crate. - Canned food, one crate. 150 00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:30,751 - Six sheets, plywood. - Six sheets, plywood. 151 00:15:30,881 --> 00:15:32,041 Six sheets, plywood. 152 00:15:33,925 --> 00:15:36,962 - Six sheets, plywood. - Six sheets, plywood. 153 00:15:37,095 --> 00:15:39,507 - Sugar, one sack. - Sugar, one sack. 154 00:15:51,526 --> 00:15:52,732 Oh, all right. 155 00:15:52,861 --> 00:15:54,817 Sugar, one sack. 156 00:16:02,913 --> 00:16:05,074 Won't you ever stop playing hide and seek with us? 157 00:16:05,207 --> 00:16:08,370 - Go on. Beat it and quick! - But you two always stop me. 158 00:16:08,502 --> 00:16:11,209 Now, see here. You're probably a good stonemason. 159 00:16:11,338 --> 00:16:13,920 - Why don't you go and work in Italy? - But I'm an immigrant! 160 00:16:14,049 --> 00:16:16,882 - That's just it. lmmigrant in Italy. - You kidding or something? 161 00:16:16,923 --> 00:16:19,110 How can you immigrate to a place you've left already? 162 00:16:19,179 --> 00:16:21,127 Well, maybe. But one sure thing, 163 00:16:21,152 --> 00:16:23,725 you're not gonna leave Marseilles without paying your passage. 164 00:16:30,690 --> 00:16:33,227 - It's a funny world, huh? - How come? 165 00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:35,851 Well, here we are, catching a man who tries to sneak off a boat 166 00:16:35,987 --> 00:16:37,898 and catching another man who tries to sneak on, 167 00:16:38,031 --> 00:16:40,568 when they could settle it so easily with one another. 168 00:16:42,786 --> 00:16:45,528 Oh yeah? You borrowed that without asking me. 169 00:16:45,664 --> 00:16:49,031 Well, I wouldn't have minded losing it if your trick had finally worked. 170 00:16:49,167 --> 00:16:50,577 It's tough, eh, Antoine? 171 00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:54,123 - Oh, I'll find another way out, don't worry. - Don't tell me about it, huh? 172 00:17:02,973 --> 00:17:04,338 Good morning, boys. 173 00:17:05,016 --> 00:17:07,052 What'd you say? 174 00:17:07,185 --> 00:17:08,675 I haven't opened my mouth! 175 00:17:08,812 --> 00:17:10,018 Good morning, boys! 176 00:17:13,108 --> 00:17:15,941 - Going on a vacation? - We're going to the South Seas. 177 00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:19,653 - That's a long trip there and a long way back! - Yeah, but we're not coming back. 178 00:17:19,781 --> 00:17:22,864 You see, we own an island out there. Don't we, Ollie? 179 00:17:22,993 --> 00:17:24,324 Uh-huh. 180 00:17:24,453 --> 00:17:27,866 - Say, how do you start an engine? - With a mechanic, of course! 181 00:17:27,998 --> 00:17:31,616 We can't afford one. We haven't got any money. 182 00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:34,788 - We did have, but they took it all for taxes! - Well, don't worry. 183 00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:38,755 I'm going to send you a mechanic and he won't cost you a cent! 184 00:17:43,054 --> 00:17:47,013 - Well, everything's arranged. - What is? My execution? 185 00:17:47,142 --> 00:17:49,178 There are two characters alongside. 186 00:17:49,311 --> 00:17:52,769 They own an island in the South Seas. You're invited. 187 00:17:52,898 --> 00:17:55,310 And you won't need a passport to get ashore. (Whistles) 188 00:18:00,989 --> 00:18:02,854 - Thank you. - Thank you. 189 00:18:02,991 --> 00:18:04,447 - Look out. - Thank you. 190 00:18:42,364 --> 00:18:44,946 - Good morning, Stanley. - Good morning, Ollie. 191 00:18:45,867 --> 00:18:48,483 - Er, where are we? - We're here. You see? Right... 192 00:18:48,620 --> 00:18:51,953 Well, we shouldn't be. We'll have to change our course. 193 00:18:55,752 --> 00:18:57,788 Keep her on course. You can eat later. 194 00:18:57,921 --> 00:19:00,788 - But I'm hungry. - So am I! Selfish! 195 00:19:39,546 --> 00:19:41,912 - Your hat. - Oh, thank you. 196 00:19:42,048 --> 00:19:45,290 Forgetting your manners when you get on a yacht... 197 00:19:48,597 --> 00:19:52,681 Stanley, this is wonderful. The sea, the sky, the sun... 198 00:19:52,809 --> 00:19:55,551 And you and I alone on the bounding main. 199 00:19:55,687 --> 00:19:57,598 What do you mean, alone? He's with us. 200 00:19:57,731 --> 00:20:01,565 Oh, of course, Antoine. He's our very, very good friend. 201 00:20:01,693 --> 00:20:02,933 Yes, sir. 202 00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:06,561 And we'll share and share alike. 203 00:20:06,698 --> 00:20:08,154 Thank you. 204 00:20:08,783 --> 00:20:10,489 Thank you. 205 00:20:15,874 --> 00:20:19,867 Stanley, open the skylight so we can get some of that good sea air. 206 00:20:25,925 --> 00:20:30,089 You know what? You need glasses. 207 00:20:30,221 --> 00:20:32,587 - It's already open. - What? 208 00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:37,513 When you get to the island, you'd better see an optimist. 209 00:20:37,646 --> 00:20:39,182 Hot rolls and butter. 210 00:20:39,314 --> 00:20:43,557 And for the place 0’9 res/sfance, Antoine presents his specialty, 211 00:20:43,693 --> 00:20:46,685 the 0079 0’9 veau yam/19. 212 00:20:47,322 --> 00:20:49,813 - Ah! Sounds good. - Mmh! 213 00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:54,985 I'm going to enjoy that, I know. I love 0079 de... 214 00:21:37,747 --> 00:21:42,958 Hey, Antoine. I suppose in the yam/e you use a small touch of garlic. 215 00:21:43,086 --> 00:21:45,327 Oh, I hardly use a pinch. 216 00:22:01,020 --> 00:22:06,356 A man that would steal food from a friend is the smallest thing in the world. 217 00:22:06,484 --> 00:22:07,974 Oh, I don't know. 218 00:22:08,111 --> 00:22:12,195 All I hope, Stanley, is that you enjoyed your roll. 219 00:22:12,323 --> 00:22:14,655 How could I enjoy it, when you stole it? 220 00:22:14,784 --> 00:22:17,651 - What do you mean, I stole it? You stole it! - You're telling... 221 00:22:18,371 --> 00:22:21,909 I would like you to know how happy I am to have you both as my friends. 222 00:22:22,041 --> 00:22:24,498 I would like to give you a toast. 223 00:22:24,627 --> 00:22:27,084 - I give you friendship! - Friendship! 224 00:22:27,213 --> 00:22:28,828 Here's how! 225 00:22:58,036 --> 00:23:00,027 Let's have another, eh? 226 00:23:08,421 --> 00:23:09,536 To friendship! 227 00:23:09,672 --> 00:23:11,162 - To friendship! - To friendship! 228 00:23:11,299 --> 00:23:13,164 Here's to your health! 229 00:23:24,062 --> 00:23:25,427 Friendship! 230 00:23:25,563 --> 00:23:27,679 Friendship. That's something really swell, no? 231 00:23:27,816 --> 00:23:30,228 No! Definitely no! 232 00:23:30,360 --> 00:23:33,443 Oh! Oh, the chops are done. Sit down, my friends. 233 00:23:34,030 --> 00:23:36,897 Antoine is going to serve you his masterpiece. 234 00:24:17,574 --> 00:24:21,237 - What's the matter now? - You know what's the matter. 235 00:24:21,369 --> 00:24:25,487 I want my chop! Varnished with garlic! 236 00:24:27,208 --> 00:24:29,073 You've got a lot of nerve! 237 00:24:29,210 --> 00:24:31,917 You want my chop after you've eaten yours! 238 00:24:35,925 --> 00:24:38,883 - I'm sorry. - Well, you should be! 239 00:24:42,223 --> 00:24:44,339 Just a minute! 240 00:24:44,475 --> 00:24:46,591 Where's my potato? 241 00:24:47,437 --> 00:24:48,643 Now, listen. 242 00:24:48,771 --> 00:24:52,855 If you think I've eaten your roll and your potato and drank your wine, 243 00:24:52,984 --> 00:24:56,317 - weigh me. - Well, if you didn't, who did? 244 00:25:10,793 --> 00:25:12,658 You can't scare us with that. 245 00:25:12,795 --> 00:25:15,878 As admiral of this ship, I'll have Stanley put you in irons! 246 00:25:16,007 --> 00:25:18,248 What's all this about? 247 00:25:18,384 --> 00:25:22,718 - You stole my potato! - Yeah! And my roll, wine and chop! 248 00:25:25,725 --> 00:25:28,683 Incidentally, who's steering the boat? 249 00:25:28,811 --> 00:25:34,022 Oh, I forgot to tell you. I tied the wheel on its course. 250 00:25:40,949 --> 00:25:43,861 Well, for once you have used your head. 251 00:25:43,993 --> 00:25:47,156 Thank you, Ollie. I'll try and do that more often. 252 00:25:54,754 --> 00:25:58,042 - What was that? - The motor's stopped! 253 00:25:58,174 --> 00:25:59,789 Fix it. You're the engineer. 254 00:25:59,926 --> 00:26:01,962 To tell you the truth, I'm not a mechanic. 255 00:26:02,095 --> 00:26:05,053 The captain on the boat cooked up that story just to get rid of me. 256 00:26:05,181 --> 00:26:09,925 As usual, I'll have to do everything myself! 257 00:26:10,061 --> 00:26:13,724 - Get up on deck and stand by! - Stand by what? 258 00:26:13,856 --> 00:26:16,313 Stand up on deck! 259 00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:19,851 We'll take this little matter up later! 260 00:26:29,455 --> 00:26:31,946 What do you think is wrong with it? 261 00:26:32,875 --> 00:26:36,413 It's no use guessing. We'll just have to take it apart and find out. 262 00:26:36,546 --> 00:26:38,411 In other words, use your head. 263 00:26:38,548 --> 00:26:40,334 What for? 264 00:26:40,466 --> 00:26:43,674 Well, you could use yours for a bowling ball! 265 00:26:44,595 --> 00:26:48,679 - You mean one of those with a hole in? - Exactly! 266 00:26:50,435 --> 00:26:52,300 Now, give me a hand. 267 00:26:55,398 --> 00:26:57,935 Now let that be a lesson to you. 268 00:27:09,912 --> 00:27:11,277 Here. 269 00:27:22,467 --> 00:27:25,300 - (Ollie) Put that down! 270 00:27:40,234 --> 00:27:41,440 Ollie? 271 00:27:42,862 --> 00:27:45,945 - What? - The gas tank's empty! 272 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:50,488 Why didn't you tell me that before? 273 00:27:50,620 --> 00:27:53,612 Give me the parts and I'll put them back together. 274 00:28:05,343 --> 00:28:08,210 Now we've got nothing left but the sail. 275 00:28:16,938 --> 00:28:19,680 Now, when I give the signal, you pull. 276 00:28:27,615 --> 00:28:30,027 What are you doing? I could have broken my arm! 277 00:28:30,159 --> 00:28:32,115 Who are you and what are you doing on this boat? 278 00:28:32,245 --> 00:28:33,610 You have no rights here! 279 00:28:33,746 --> 00:28:36,158 I have my rights! I am travelling as a stowaway! 280 00:28:36,290 --> 00:28:38,372 They didn't tell us a stowaway came with the boat. 281 00:28:38,501 --> 00:28:39,957 - No. - Listen, fellas... 282 00:28:40,086 --> 00:28:42,498 I could have easily been a stowaway on any other boat. 283 00:28:42,630 --> 00:28:43,995 I happened to pick this one. 284 00:28:44,132 --> 00:28:46,293 Then you have to find me and spoil everything. 285 00:28:46,425 --> 00:28:49,588 Well, we had to use the sail because the engine broke! 286 00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:54,510 - Well, why don't you try fixing the motor? - We tried to, but it fell in the sea. 287 00:28:54,642 --> 00:28:56,348 Fell in the sea! Holy mackerel! 288 00:28:56,477 --> 00:28:59,469 Just my luck to be a stowaway on a boat run by two land lubbers 289 00:28:59,605 --> 00:29:02,813 who manage to drop the engine in the ocean! The ocean! Argh! 290 00:29:02,942 --> 00:29:04,648 You know, I think we've offended him. 291 00:29:04,777 --> 00:29:06,062 What's happened? What goes on here? 292 00:29:06,195 --> 00:29:09,187 We've got a stowaway aboard. This is Antoine, the chef. 293 00:29:09,323 --> 00:29:11,530 - Giovanni Copini. - Glad to meet you, sir. 294 00:29:11,659 --> 00:29:14,025 - And this is Stanley. - How do you do? 295 00:29:21,002 --> 00:29:23,163 How do you do? 296 00:29:25,756 --> 00:29:27,872 Why don't you be careful? 297 00:29:28,009 --> 00:29:30,500 Come on, we can't waste all day just talking! 298 00:29:30,636 --> 00:29:33,252 Get that rope! Get the sail up! Go ahead! 299 00:29:33,389 --> 00:29:35,425 You, the fat one, get on the other side! 300 00:29:35,558 --> 00:29:37,298 Pull! It takes muscle to raise a sail! 301 00:29:37,435 --> 00:29:39,892 The fat one, the other side! All together now! 302 00:29:40,021 --> 00:29:44,230 Hey, ho! 303 00:29:44,358 --> 00:29:46,895 Hey, ho! Come on, pull on this. 304 00:29:47,028 --> 00:29:49,690 Ho! Hey, ho! 305 00:29:49,822 --> 00:29:52,188 Hey, ho! 306 00:30:24,857 --> 00:30:27,894 - Just in time to eat lunch. - Never mind eating! 307 00:30:28,027 --> 00:30:29,983 What happened to my pants? 308 00:30:30,112 --> 00:30:33,821 I put them right there to dry. It's getting to the place that you... 309 00:30:33,950 --> 00:30:36,532 Hey, the boat's moving! 310 00:30:37,870 --> 00:30:39,235 You g... 311 00:30:50,508 --> 00:30:53,500 - Kinda nice, eh, Stanley? - Sure is. 312 00:30:53,636 --> 00:30:56,469 Just like playing hooky from school. 313 00:30:56,597 --> 00:30:58,713 We're all playing hooky more or less. 314 00:30:58,849 --> 00:31:02,137 Giovanni, what are you playing hooky from? 315 00:31:02,270 --> 00:31:05,603 From a world where I'm always being told what to do and then how to do it. 316 00:31:06,482 --> 00:31:10,316 One day, a rich real-estate man in my village hired me to build a wall. 317 00:31:10,444 --> 00:31:14,938 I spent weeks trying to find bricks the right shape and kind of colour he wanted. 318 00:31:15,074 --> 00:31:17,611 I fitted them into place one by one, 319 00:31:17,743 --> 00:31:20,200 as if they were jewels. 320 00:31:20,329 --> 00:31:23,992 When the wall was finished, it was shining in the sun like a real work of art, 321 00:31:24,125 --> 00:31:27,709 because it was me, Giovanni, the best mason in Italy who'd built it. 322 00:31:28,546 --> 00:31:30,707 Then the man came to have a look. 323 00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,546 And he ordered me to tear down the wall. 324 00:31:32,675 --> 00:31:35,838 He'd suddenly changed his mind. He wanted a picket fence. 325 00:31:35,970 --> 00:31:39,588 - That's when I decided to play hooky. - We don't blame you. 326 00:31:39,724 --> 00:31:42,215 - And you, what are you playing hooky from? - Taxes! 327 00:31:42,351 --> 00:31:45,138 Yeah, we don't like taxes! 328 00:31:46,564 --> 00:31:49,601 Hey, Antoine, what about you? Where is your home? 329 00:31:49,734 --> 00:31:53,192 My home? I don't know. 330 00:31:53,321 --> 00:31:55,687 The whole world ought to be man's country. 331 00:31:55,823 --> 00:31:57,404 But for me... 332 00:31:57,533 --> 00:32:00,149 Someone seems to have locked all the doors. 333 00:32:01,871 --> 00:32:04,203 I can just see our island now. 334 00:32:05,124 --> 00:32:08,116 Palm trees and flowers... 335 00:32:08,252 --> 00:32:12,336 The sun to warm us, and the gentle rain. 336 00:32:22,933 --> 00:32:25,549 It's a storm! Don't you think you'd better get the boat ready? 337 00:32:25,686 --> 00:32:27,597 Oh, yes, it looks like a bad one. 338 00:32:27,730 --> 00:32:30,767 - I never saw one like this before. - Me neither! 339 00:32:30,900 --> 00:32:34,518 - We'd better pull down the sail! - I'll go and get the life raft! 340 00:33:05,017 --> 00:33:06,973 Pull down the sail! 341 00:35:49,265 --> 00:35:52,132 Help! 342 00:35:53,060 --> 00:35:54,641 Help! 343 00:37:13,974 --> 00:37:16,215 Ah, look at that! 344 00:37:18,562 --> 00:37:21,019 - An island! - We're on an island! 345 00:37:21,148 --> 00:37:23,389 Stanley, we're on it. 346 00:37:33,869 --> 00:37:36,281 We're on an island! Take a peep! 347 00:37:37,289 --> 00:37:38,745 Take a peep! 348 00:37:38,874 --> 00:37:41,365 I'm too popped to peep. 349 00:37:42,836 --> 00:37:44,167 Oh! 350 00:37:44,296 --> 00:37:47,003 Oh, look. Look! 351 00:37:47,132 --> 00:37:49,464 Oh, boy! 352 00:37:50,219 --> 00:37:51,755 It's an atoll! 353 00:37:51,887 --> 00:37:54,629 That's what it is, an atoll! Come on! 354 00:37:54,765 --> 00:37:57,256 - Yes, yes. - Come on, brother. Easy, easy. 355 00:37:57,393 --> 00:37:58,803 Easy, easy! 356 00:37:58,936 --> 00:38:01,723 It's all right! It's all right. Let's go fishing now, eh? 357 00:38:01,855 --> 00:38:03,686 - Hand me a basket. - Right away! 358 00:38:04,358 --> 00:38:08,226 Quick! A pot, some wood. Build a fire for the boa/Y/abal'sse. 359 00:38:08,362 --> 00:38:09,852 Don't forget to put some garlic in it. 360 00:38:09,988 --> 00:38:13,526 Oh, without it, it wouldn't be a real boa/Y/abal'sse. 361 00:38:50,612 --> 00:38:52,102 Well, it don't look so bad. 362 00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:54,525 Still in good condition. 363 00:39:13,093 --> 00:39:15,960 Antoine, what time are you serving dinner? 364 00:39:16,096 --> 00:39:18,337 If you want to eat, you'd better go build a fire. 365 00:39:18,474 --> 00:39:21,341 And you, my boy, clean the fish. 366 00:39:22,644 --> 00:39:25,181 You get the paper and I'll get the wood. 367 00:39:30,194 --> 00:39:31,900 - Ollie? - Yeah? 368 00:39:32,029 --> 00:39:34,736 Hold this a minute, will you? I can't... 369 00:39:46,210 --> 00:39:49,327 You know, boys? There seems to be a lot of room for building houses here. 370 00:39:49,463 --> 00:39:52,000 Yeah, it sure is naked around here. 371 00:39:52,132 --> 00:39:54,623 Admiral, what do we do on a deserted island? 372 00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:58,048 Here's a man that was shipwrecked and he did all right. 373 00:39:58,180 --> 00:39:59,716 Listen. 374 00:39:59,848 --> 00:40:03,011 "Robinson Crusoe was born in the city of York. 375 00:40:03,143 --> 00:40:05,555 "His father wanted him to become a lawyer. 376 00:40:05,687 --> 00:40:08,724 "But young Crusoe longed to go to sea." 377 00:40:17,991 --> 00:40:22,451 'Our modern Robinson Crusoes have gotten used to their new life. 378 00:40:22,579 --> 00:40:24,911 'By using the latest scientific farming methods, 379 00:40:25,040 --> 00:40:27,827 'they have tamed the wild land. 380 00:40:33,340 --> 00:40:37,549 'And Mother Nature has supplied them with plenty of fresh water.' 381 00:40:52,234 --> 00:40:55,021 'Man has set to work. So has nature. 382 00:40:55,153 --> 00:40:59,146 'She has quickly changed a barren rock into an enchanting paradise. 383 00:40:59,283 --> 00:41:02,491 'Weeks, months, years have passed. 384 00:41:02,619 --> 00:41:04,575 'Everything has now improved. 385 00:41:04,705 --> 00:41:09,825 'At last our castaways have earned the right to take a little time off from their hard work.' 386 00:41:18,427 --> 00:41:21,885 Oscar. Oscar! 387 00:41:43,327 --> 00:41:45,443 'For the animals, as well as for the men, 388 00:41:45,579 --> 00:41:48,036 'this island has become a real paradise. 389 00:41:48,165 --> 00:41:51,077 'Yes, but a Garden of Eden without Eve, 390 00:41:51,209 --> 00:41:53,916 'and Adam is bored. 391 00:41:54,046 --> 00:41:55,377 'But... but What's this? 392 00:41:56,131 --> 00:41:58,463 'Where are these skipping stones leading us to? 393 00:41:58,592 --> 00:42:01,174 'To Papeete, the capital of Tahiti. 394 00:42:01,303 --> 00:42:05,967 'And who do we find? Eve! I beg your pardon... Cherie Lamour. 395 00:42:06,099 --> 00:42:10,513 'As you can see, she's got plenty of brains and culture. 396 00:42:10,646 --> 00:42:12,853 'The most glamorous girl in Tahiti, 397 00:42:12,981 --> 00:42:15,643 'and born in Paris, of course. 398 00:42:15,776 --> 00:42:17,266 'Today is her big day. 399 00:42:17,402 --> 00:42:20,064 'First of all, she is taking an audition at the Cockatoo, 400 00:42:20,197 --> 00:42:21,903 'the smartest night club in town. 401 00:42:22,699 --> 00:42:26,783 'And also she is expected at the courthouse for an important occasion. 402 00:42:26,912 --> 00:42:29,779 'She's going to marry Lieutenant Jack Frazer.’ 403 00:42:37,923 --> 00:42:39,333 What time is it? 404 00:42:40,175 --> 00:42:41,335 Twelve fifteen! 405 00:42:50,477 --> 00:42:55,938 ♪ When you are sad and lonely 406 00:42:56,692 --> 00:43:00,310 ♪ And your heart will break 407 00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:07,529 ♪ Ask who's not so lonely 408 00:43:07,661 --> 00:43:11,199 ♪ You lie awake 409 00:43:12,207 --> 00:43:14,949 ♪ Why should you let yourself be blue 410 00:43:15,085 --> 00:43:19,419 ♪ When I have got a cure for you? 411 00:43:21,425 --> 00:43:25,043 ♪ Suppose your heart, for lack of love, is pining 412 00:43:25,178 --> 00:43:27,009 ♪ Then come and get it 413 00:43:27,139 --> 00:43:28,754 ♪ Oh, come and get it 414 00:43:28,890 --> 00:43:32,428 ♪ You'll find the joy for which your heart's inclining 415 00:43:32,561 --> 00:43:36,304 ♪ If you surrender yourself to me 416 00:43:40,235 --> 00:43:44,274 ♪ To love I dedicate myself completely 417 00:43:44,406 --> 00:43:48,024 ♪ So come and get it, you won't regret it 418 00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,527 ♪ And first of all, I'll hold my tongue discreetly 419 00:43:51,663 --> 00:43:55,326 ♪ When you surrender yourself to me 420 00:43:56,626 --> 00:44:00,665 ♪ I give you all the love you deserve 421 00:44:00,797 --> 00:44:04,381 ♪ If only for a day 422 00:44:05,093 --> 00:44:09,632 ♪ And if of our affair you should tire 423 00:44:09,765 --> 00:44:14,850 ♪ Don't send me on my way 424 00:44:16,146 --> 00:44:19,809 ♪ If love is what your lonely heart's still missing 425 00:44:19,941 --> 00:44:21,727 ♪ Then come and get it 426 00:44:21,860 --> 00:44:26,194 ♪ And once you've met me 427 00:44:26,323 --> 00:44:29,736 ♪ Enjoy the rapture of my expertise 428 00:44:29,868 --> 00:44:33,986 ♪ And learn how tender my love can be 429 00:44:34,122 --> 00:44:37,080 .I‘Ah... 430 00:44:38,043 --> 00:44:40,830 ♪ Will you explore a month of spring 431 00:44:40,962 --> 00:44:44,170 .I‘ Ah-ha... 432 00:44:45,592 --> 00:44:49,881 ♪ Put up your hand and show you will ♪ 433 00:44:53,266 --> 00:44:55,052 Thank you. 434 00:44:57,562 --> 00:44:59,223 Can't you stay and have a drink on that? 435 00:44:59,356 --> 00:45:02,814 Oh, no, no, no, I'm late, there'll be fireworks. Thank you. Goodbye. 436 00:45:02,943 --> 00:45:04,808 Thank you. Goodbye. 437 00:45:05,654 --> 00:45:08,896 Ah, Miss Lamour. This way, please. 438 00:45:10,450 --> 00:45:11,610 Ah! 439 00:45:11,743 --> 00:45:13,825 Oh, sweetheart, I'm so pleased. 440 00:45:13,954 --> 00:45:15,865 Hardly looks like it! You're three quarters of an hour late. 441 00:45:15,997 --> 00:45:18,613 You're not going to grumble about three little quarters of an hour? 442 00:45:18,750 --> 00:45:21,162 Your Honour, I didn't keep you waiting, I hope? 443 00:45:21,294 --> 00:45:24,081 - Well, er... - Uh-uh-uh! Cherie! 444 00:45:25,507 --> 00:45:29,625 Oh, Your Honour, look at them. Aren't they lovely? 445 00:45:29,761 --> 00:45:31,877 - But you've been so extravagant, my dear. - Don't mention it. 446 00:45:32,013 --> 00:45:36,632 Miss Lamour and you, sir. Marriage is a most important thing. 447 00:45:36,768 --> 00:45:38,508 And I should like before proceeding any further... 448 00:45:38,645 --> 00:45:40,761 - I got my contract. - What contract? 449 00:45:40,897 --> 00:45:43,354 When we're married we're going to share everything in common. 450 00:45:43,483 --> 00:45:46,646 That's not what I'm talking about. My contract with the Cockatoo! 451 00:45:46,778 --> 00:45:48,143 My debut's tomorrow night, 452 00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:50,316 so you'll have a chance to come and see me before you sail. 453 00:45:50,448 --> 00:45:54,657 - Miss Lamour, if you please, won't you... - Oh, but I'm listening to you, Your Honour. 454 00:45:55,328 --> 00:45:59,162 Miss Lamour, Lieutenant, marriage is a most important thing. 455 00:45:59,291 --> 00:46:00,371 Just a minute. 456 00:46:03,378 --> 00:46:05,369 but I've something to straighten out with my fiancee. 457 00:46:05,505 --> 00:46:07,291 It's most unusual, but if... 458 00:46:07,424 --> 00:46:10,962 Am I to understand that you intend to continue your career after we are married? 459 00:46:11,094 --> 00:46:14,757 But of course, my sweetheart. You never suggested that I should give it up. 460 00:46:14,890 --> 00:46:16,380 I never broached the subject 461 00:46:16,516 --> 00:46:18,632 because I took it for granted that after we were married 462 00:46:18,768 --> 00:46:20,383 you'd devote yourself entirely to me. 463 00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:23,182 Nothing would please me more if you were here all the time. 464 00:46:23,315 --> 00:46:26,307 But when you spend ten months out of the year sailing the seas, 465 00:46:26,443 --> 00:46:29,401 what do you expect me to do? Swim behind your little barge? 466 00:46:29,529 --> 00:46:30,814 Well, look, honey, 467 00:46:30,947 --> 00:46:33,939 I'm not going to tolerate that while I'm out at sea 468 00:46:34,075 --> 00:46:37,533 you spend your nights playing "Come On, Girl" in some clip joint. 469 00:46:37,662 --> 00:46:40,870 Oh! "Come On, Girl" in some clip joint! 470 00:46:40,999 --> 00:46:43,957 What do you think I am? I'm an artiste, not a bum. 471 00:46:44,085 --> 00:46:46,918 You know what people call me? The female Caruso. 472 00:46:47,047 --> 00:46:49,629 That's a fact, Your Honour. The female Caruso! 473 00:46:53,929 --> 00:46:57,513 - Calm yourself, Miss Lamour. - I'm very calm, Your Honour! 474 00:46:57,641 --> 00:46:59,597 But I'm not going to submit to this kind of blackmail! 475 00:46:59,726 --> 00:47:02,058 In that case I'm not going to hang around here. 476 00:47:02,187 --> 00:47:04,599 You think about it, but think fast. 477 00:47:04,731 --> 00:47:05,937 Please, sir... 478 00:47:06,066 --> 00:47:08,933 Let him go away, Your Honour. I won't run after him! Do you hear me? 479 00:47:09,069 --> 00:47:10,354 Miss Lamour... 480 00:47:10,487 --> 00:47:13,445 Think about it as well, and come and give me your answer tomorrow night at the Cockatoo. 481 00:47:13,573 --> 00:47:15,529 If you're not in the audience, I know what your answer is. 482 00:47:15,659 --> 00:47:17,991 Jack! Sweetheart! 483 00:47:19,663 --> 00:47:21,745 He will come, won't he? 484 00:47:21,873 --> 00:47:24,364 Tell him that if he doesn't show up tomorrow night, 485 00:47:24,501 --> 00:47:26,412 he'll never see me again. 486 00:47:26,544 --> 00:47:28,500 I don't know what I'll do yet, 487 00:47:28,630 --> 00:47:30,996 but I’ll see to it he never finds me. 488 00:47:31,132 --> 00:47:34,875 OK, I'll give him the message, but you know him better than I do. 489 00:47:35,011 --> 00:47:38,344 Hm! Well, then, he'll show up, I'm sure. 490 00:47:42,644 --> 00:47:48,480 ♪ Can you guess just how much I adore you 491 00:47:48,608 --> 00:47:54,820 ♪ How I long for your sweet embrace 492 00:47:54,948 --> 00:48:01,194 ♪ Can you guess how the love that I feel for you 493 00:48:01,329 --> 00:48:07,325 ♪ Fills my heart with such bliss when we meet and we kiss 494 00:48:07,460 --> 00:48:12,955 ♪ Can you guess how I love to be near you 495 00:48:13,091 --> 00:48:19,303 ♪ How I scream at each tender caress 496 00:48:19,431 --> 00:48:22,343 ♪ For the song that poets sing 497 00:48:22,475 --> 00:48:26,059 ♪ Can't describe that precious thing 498 00:48:26,187 --> 00:48:31,807 ♪ And the love that I want to express 499 00:48:31,943 --> 00:48:35,856 ♪ Only you can guess 500 00:48:37,949 --> 00:48:41,066 ♪ My window looks upon the square 501 00:48:41,202 --> 00:48:43,864 ♪ When I'm alone I hear the feet 502 00:48:43,997 --> 00:48:47,080 ♪ Of people passing in the street 503 00:48:47,208 --> 00:48:51,451 ♪ But for tonight no sorrow to bear 504 00:48:52,297 --> 00:48:57,132 ♪ Come close to me and hold my hand 505 00:48:57,260 --> 00:49:00,752 ♪ I can't hear your heart beating near 506 00:49:00,889 --> 00:49:05,633 ♪ And feel the touch I love so much 507 00:49:05,769 --> 00:49:11,480 ♪ And our delight fills all the night 508 00:49:12,484 --> 00:49:18,229 ♪ Can you guess just how much I adore you? 509 00:49:19,574 --> 00:49:24,409 ♪ How I long for your sweet embrace 510 00:49:25,372 --> 00:49:31,789 ♪ Can you guess all the love that I feel for you 511 00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:37,916 ♪ Fills my heart with such bliss when we meet and we kiss 512 00:49:38,051 --> 00:49:42,841 ♪ Can you guess how I long to be near you? 513 00:49:43,723 --> 00:49:49,810 ♪ How I scream at each tender caress 514 00:49:49,938 --> 00:49:53,101 ♪ For the song that poets sing 515 00:49:53,233 --> 00:49:57,897 ♪ Can't describe that precious thing 516 00:49:58,029 --> 00:50:03,649 ♪ And the love that I want to express 517 00:50:04,494 --> 00:50:09,739 ♪ Only you can guess ♪ 518 00:50:09,874 --> 00:50:12,707 Magnificent! And to think that pighead didn't show up! 519 00:50:32,063 --> 00:50:35,271 He didn't show up! He didn't show up! He ruined everything! 520 00:50:36,484 --> 00:50:38,770 - Where is he? - He sailed this morning. 521 00:50:38,903 --> 00:50:40,894 I wouldn't even listen. He said he wouldn't give in. 522 00:50:41,030 --> 00:50:43,146 I won't give in either. 523 00:50:43,950 --> 00:50:45,941 Did you tell him he might lose me forever? 524 00:50:47,078 --> 00:50:48,113 I did. 525 00:50:48,246 --> 00:50:49,656 Encore! Encore! 526 00:50:55,837 --> 00:50:58,078 - They want an encore. Hurry up, quick! - Yes, yes. 527 00:50:58,214 --> 00:51:00,330 But Jack will be back in two weeks. You'll see him again. 528 00:51:00,467 --> 00:51:02,423 - What do I care? I won't be here. - What? 529 00:51:02,552 --> 00:51:05,589 - When is your ship sailing, Captain? - Next Friday. Why? 530 00:51:05,722 --> 00:51:09,214 - Take me as a passenger. - But my tub's no luxury liner, understand? 531 00:51:09,350 --> 00:51:11,511 It makes no difference. All I want is to leave. 532 00:51:11,644 --> 00:51:15,102 Hey! There's also my wife. 533 00:51:15,231 --> 00:51:17,722 Aye-aye-aye. .. 534 00:51:56,773 --> 00:52:00,516 - Ah! The hunting season's on? - Get up! Out of that bed! 535 00:52:00,652 --> 00:52:03,359 Your husband should've warned me you're coming on this voyage. 536 00:52:03,488 --> 00:52:05,444 I wouldn't have sailed on this slave ship. 537 00:52:05,573 --> 00:52:07,859 I never believed that story of your marriage with Frazer being off. 538 00:52:08,618 --> 00:52:11,405 I had a hunch you were going to make a play for my husband. 539 00:52:11,538 --> 00:52:13,745 Get up! And start your packing! 540 00:52:13,873 --> 00:52:16,285 - You're going to throw me overboard? - No. 541 00:52:17,168 --> 00:52:21,502 We're going to land you on an island. An island unknown. 542 00:52:21,631 --> 00:52:23,087 Are there people on it? 543 00:52:23,216 --> 00:52:25,423 You'll find out about that as soon as you land. 544 00:52:25,552 --> 00:52:28,840 Wherever you appear, in no time you're surrounded by men. 545 00:52:33,369 --> 00:52:36,371 No, I tell you it isn't fair to put this poor girl up in a deserted island. 546 00:52:36,396 --> 00:52:37,932 There are houses. I saw them. 547 00:52:38,064 --> 00:52:39,850 Where there are houses, there are people. 548 00:52:39,983 --> 00:52:41,519 - It suits me. - Get moving! 549 00:52:41,651 --> 00:52:44,768 But I keep telling you, she only came aboard on account of Frazer, 550 00:52:44,904 --> 00:52:46,064 just to make him jealous. 551 00:52:46,197 --> 00:52:48,529 He'll blow his top if I tell him I put you off on an island. 552 00:52:48,658 --> 00:52:50,865 You don't have to tell him about it. 553 00:52:51,661 --> 00:52:55,995 Or rather... tell him I can be just as stubborn as he can. 554 00:52:58,293 --> 00:53:01,911 - I'll row you over. - No, you don't! You stay right here. 555 00:53:02,046 --> 00:53:05,914 She knows how to row, and if she can't, she'll have to swim. 556 00:53:06,050 --> 00:53:08,291 - So long, sweetheart! - No! 557 00:53:13,224 --> 00:53:15,715 I'm glad you boys are here. I want to talk to you. 558 00:53:15,852 --> 00:53:17,638 Where were you fellas a while ago? 559 00:53:17,770 --> 00:53:20,477 I was down at the beach getting these fish for dinner. See? 560 00:53:20,607 --> 00:53:22,893 I was working in the garden. 561 00:53:23,026 --> 00:53:25,392 Did you see or hear anything? 562 00:53:25,528 --> 00:53:27,018 - Just the waves. - Why? 563 00:53:27,155 --> 00:53:30,773 I'll tell you why. Because I was down by the lagoon, 564 00:53:30,908 --> 00:53:33,650 and I thought I heard the engines of a big boat. 565 00:53:33,786 --> 00:53:35,026 Then it whistled. 566 00:53:35,163 --> 00:53:38,747 By the time I climbed up to see, there was nothing there. 567 00:53:38,875 --> 00:53:42,163 - That's because it had gone. - Oh! 568 00:53:43,004 --> 00:53:45,837 - What had gone? - The boat. 569 00:53:50,094 --> 00:53:53,837 Do you mean to tell me that you saw a boat and didn't let us know? 570 00:53:53,973 --> 00:53:58,512 Well, I saw and I waved to it, but it didn't wave back, so I... 571 00:53:58,645 --> 00:54:02,103 Get us something to drink before I forget myself. 572 00:54:05,068 --> 00:54:07,855 Stan has certainly received more than his share of stupidity. 573 00:54:07,987 --> 00:54:10,945 Yeah, no one person could be really such a blockhead. 574 00:54:14,577 --> 00:54:16,659 Pardon me. 575 00:54:28,132 --> 00:54:32,000 - What’s the matter with you? - I think I saw something. 576 00:54:32,136 --> 00:54:34,218 What are you talking about? 577 00:54:34,347 --> 00:54:36,884 There's a girl in the kitchen. 578 00:54:37,642 --> 00:54:40,850 You are absolutely right. 579 00:54:40,978 --> 00:54:43,390 - There she is! - Hello. 580 00:54:53,366 --> 00:54:55,527 Well, hello, fellas. 581 00:54:56,369 --> 00:54:57,654 How did you get here? 582 00:54:57,787 --> 00:55:01,780 Well, I guess you might say I was dropped by a witch. 583 00:55:01,916 --> 00:55:03,872 Like the one that rides on a broom? 584 00:55:04,001 --> 00:55:05,707 No. 585 00:55:05,837 --> 00:55:07,668 This one used a shotgun. 586 00:55:07,797 --> 00:55:11,585 I'm sorry for this intrusion, but you'll have to take me as a guest, I'm afraid. 587 00:55:11,718 --> 00:55:13,049 It will be a pleasure. 588 00:55:13,177 --> 00:55:15,293 I knew I should've built a guest house a long time ago. 589 00:55:15,430 --> 00:55:18,467 Oh... There's no place for me to stay? 590 00:55:18,599 --> 00:55:21,215 Oh, don't you worry your pretty little head about that. 591 00:55:21,352 --> 00:55:23,718 Giovanni and Antoine will move in with Stanley and me. 592 00:55:24,564 --> 00:55:27,522 - And you can stay right here. - You're very kind. 593 00:55:27,650 --> 00:55:30,517 Come, my little princess, and I shall show you to your boudoir. 594 00:55:30,653 --> 00:55:33,315 You know, I think I'm going to like this place. 595 00:55:33,448 --> 00:55:36,781 It's swell. You don't have to shave or anything. 596 00:55:44,584 --> 00:55:48,293 I left my taxi down at the beach with all my things. 597 00:55:48,421 --> 00:55:51,788 Er, gentlemen, get the lady's luggage and bring it to her chateau. 598 00:55:51,924 --> 00:55:53,915 Thank you. 599 00:55:54,051 --> 00:55:55,477 What's that funny thing up there? 600 00:55:55,502 --> 00:55:58,757 That, my dear, is the wreckage of the good ship Momus. 601 00:55:58,890 --> 00:56:01,802 I shall never forget the day that I found this island. 602 00:56:01,934 --> 00:56:05,267 It was a terrible night, dark as pitch. 603 00:56:05,396 --> 00:56:08,354 It was so pitch, you couldn't see your hand behind your back. 604 00:56:08,483 --> 00:56:10,690 Exactly, Stanley! 605 00:56:10,818 --> 00:56:14,436 Then, all of a sudden, I spotted that harbour. 606 00:56:14,572 --> 00:56:17,439 I put her bow into the teeth of the gale, 607 00:56:17,575 --> 00:56:22,365 lashed myself to the wheel and beached her on that pinnacle. 608 00:56:22,497 --> 00:56:24,954 And it's been there ever since. 609 00:56:25,082 --> 00:56:27,949 Well boys, you must have had trouble getting it up so high. 610 00:56:28,085 --> 00:56:31,293 - He read it in a book. - Er, come, my dear. Book... 611 00:56:33,216 --> 00:56:36,299 One, two, three... It's all there. Thank you. 612 00:57:28,980 --> 00:57:32,643 Stanley, have you forgotten that we have company? 613 00:57:38,072 --> 00:57:40,734 Gentlemen, make yourselves comfortable. 614 00:57:49,542 --> 00:57:51,453 Gentlemen! 615 00:58:18,195 --> 00:58:20,231 Stanley... 616 00:58:20,364 --> 00:58:24,482 - This is my side. - Well, there's no room on my side. 617 00:58:24,619 --> 00:58:27,531 Well, the fair thing to do is to take turns. 618 00:58:27,663 --> 00:58:30,029 While one sits up, the other sleeps. 619 00:58:30,166 --> 00:58:33,624 And when he wakes up, we change. 620 00:58:33,753 --> 00:58:38,122 Now, that's what I call a sport. Thank you, Ollie. 621 00:58:38,257 --> 00:58:40,339 That's a good idea. 622 00:58:40,468 --> 00:58:45,508 I sleep, and then when you wake up, I sleep again. 623 00:58:45,640 --> 00:58:48,302 And haven't you forgotten something? 624 00:58:49,185 --> 00:58:52,393 - Huh? - Haven't you forgotten something? 625 00:58:53,564 --> 00:58:55,270 Oh... Good night, Ollie. 626 00:58:55,399 --> 00:58:58,436 - I'm sorry, I... - Get up and put that candle out. 627 00:58:58,569 --> 00:59:01,060 - But you said that I could... - Go ahead, selfish. 628 00:59:16,796 --> 00:59:18,161 Ollie. 629 00:59:19,548 --> 00:59:20,958 Ollie. 630 00:59:22,176 --> 00:59:24,007 Ollie. 631 00:59:24,136 --> 00:59:27,378 - Are you awake yet? - No! 632 00:59:58,921 --> 01:00:01,003 Pardon me. Shh! 633 01:01:19,835 --> 01:01:22,668 - What is that thing? What is it? - Look out! 634 01:01:38,187 --> 01:01:40,143 Open the window and we'll drive him out. 635 01:01:58,666 --> 01:02:02,659 ♪ La-la, la-la, la-la, la-la, la-la-la 636 01:02:02,795 --> 01:02:04,626 ♪ Oh, come and get it 637 01:02:04,755 --> 01:02:07,997 ♪ La-la, la-la-la ♪ 638 01:02:08,134 --> 01:02:10,216 - Ah! - This morning I'm going to prepare 639 01:02:10,344 --> 01:02:13,177 a magnificent seagull egg omelette with fine herbs. 640 01:02:13,305 --> 01:02:14,761 Omelette... Bah! 641 01:02:14,890 --> 01:02:18,508 Well, today I'm gonna draw the plans for a splendid villa with a big roman bath. 642 01:02:18,604 --> 01:02:20,099 What are you going to do, Ollie? 643 01:02:20,124 --> 01:02:22,637 I'm going to give you fellas a piece of my mind. 644 01:02:22,773 --> 01:02:25,515 - Cherie's a nice girl, isn't she? - Exquisite! 645 01:02:25,651 --> 01:02:27,312 - Charming! - Pretty, too! 646 01:02:27,444 --> 01:02:28,934 And we're all friends, aren't we? 647 01:02:29,071 --> 01:02:30,231 - Of course. - Naturally. 648 01:02:30,364 --> 01:02:33,731 Well, I make a motion that we never let a woman come between us. 649 01:02:33,868 --> 01:02:35,028 - Agreed? - Of course. 650 01:02:35,161 --> 01:02:37,868 - I agree. - Now, let's all get dressed. 651 01:02:40,791 --> 01:02:44,500 - Say, Ollie, where's the sandpaper? - Sandpaper? 652 01:02:45,504 --> 01:02:47,870 - In that locker. - Thank you. 653 01:03:03,397 --> 01:03:05,228 Pardon me. 654 01:03:06,025 --> 01:03:07,481 Thank you. 655 01:03:08,194 --> 01:03:09,855 Pardon me. 656 01:03:10,654 --> 01:03:12,315 Thank you. 657 01:03:16,827 --> 01:03:18,783 Pardon me. 658 01:03:22,541 --> 01:03:24,452 Thanks a lot. 659 01:03:24,585 --> 01:03:26,200 Pardon me. 660 01:03:29,840 --> 01:03:32,126 Thank you. 661 01:03:33,219 --> 01:03:35,301 Pardon me. 662 01:04:13,133 --> 01:04:15,044 Hey! 663 01:04:17,179 --> 01:04:18,885 Look! 664 01:04:29,483 --> 01:04:31,098 Hello. 665 01:04:33,821 --> 01:04:36,107 What's the matter? The cat got your tongues? 666 01:04:37,574 --> 01:04:38,609 Uh-uh. 667 01:04:38,742 --> 01:04:40,949 Mmh! How nice you look this morning. 668 01:04:43,497 --> 01:04:45,203 Come on, come on, I want you to sit down. 669 01:04:49,295 --> 01:04:52,537 I'll have the food on the table in two seconds. 670 01:05:07,396 --> 01:05:09,057 Look! She's put on clean plates! 671 01:05:09,189 --> 01:05:11,601 - Even a table cloth! - And clean napkins! 672 01:05:11,734 --> 01:05:13,816 - Yes, she even swept the floor. - Yes. 673 01:05:29,626 --> 01:05:32,117 Does this belong to anybody? 674 01:05:32,254 --> 01:05:33,494 Never saw that guy before. 675 01:05:33,630 --> 01:05:35,712 - Nobody I know. - No. 676 01:05:40,095 --> 01:05:42,837 It's mine. It's a friend. 677 01:05:44,600 --> 01:05:47,387 It's just someone I knew once. 678 01:06:00,366 --> 01:06:02,823 I have a little surprise which I hope you're going to like. 679 01:06:02,951 --> 01:06:06,068 - What, another one? - What is it? 680 01:06:06,205 --> 01:06:08,116 A boa/Y/abal'sse! 681 01:06:09,583 --> 01:06:12,996 Tell me, was your boyfriend fond of boa/Y/abal'sse? 682 01:06:13,128 --> 01:06:15,619 Oh, he loved it. 683 01:07:04,263 --> 01:07:06,754 Is this the warehouse you've been building? 684 01:07:06,890 --> 01:07:09,632 As warehouses go, it's a funny warehouse. 685 01:07:14,523 --> 01:07:16,855 This is no warehouse! 686 01:07:36,420 --> 01:07:38,627 It's for you. 687 01:07:38,755 --> 01:07:42,418 - For me? - Yes, for you. It sure is easy to fool you. 688 01:07:42,551 --> 01:07:45,167 Did you really think we were building a refrigerator? 689 01:07:45,304 --> 01:07:49,513 We were afraid you'd find out, so we put on all the decorations last night. 690 01:07:49,641 --> 01:07:51,131 Oh! 691 01:08:13,957 --> 01:08:15,868 Come on in. 692 01:08:48,742 --> 01:08:50,607 It's just lovely. 693 01:08:55,332 --> 01:08:59,541 You've all been such wonderful friends. This is the first real home I've ever had. 694 01:08:59,670 --> 01:09:01,456 I'm so happy, I... 695 01:09:03,257 --> 01:09:05,669 You're not content just to be a singer. 696 01:09:05,801 --> 01:09:07,291 You've also got to be the comedian. 697 01:09:17,521 --> 01:09:22,106 What are you playing now? Snow white and the seven dwarves? 698 01:09:24,236 --> 01:09:27,569 That's the fella in the picture that she carries around with her. 699 01:09:29,074 --> 01:09:32,282 All right! You've tracked me down! Now what? 700 01:09:32,411 --> 01:09:35,198 You're wrong, baby. I never tried tracking you down. 701 01:09:35,330 --> 01:09:38,743 Our old friend Dolan reported he'd seen an uncharted island. 702 01:09:38,875 --> 01:09:41,912 My business here is to chart it. My men are out there working at it now. 703 01:09:43,797 --> 01:09:47,210 Look here. I suppose I ought a have my head examined, 704 01:09:47,342 --> 01:09:49,958 but I'm going to give you one more chance. 705 01:09:50,846 --> 01:09:54,088 Go and pack you're things and be down at the beach in 15 minutes. 706 01:09:56,059 --> 01:09:57,424 What for? 707 01:09:57,561 --> 01:09:59,973 Well, I suppose you want to be rescued, don't you? 708 01:10:00,105 --> 01:10:01,766 Not by you! 709 01:10:04,109 --> 01:10:06,395 Lieutenant! Come right away! We've found something! 710 01:10:06,528 --> 01:10:08,735 OK. I'll be right with you. 711 01:10:10,616 --> 01:10:12,902 This is your last chance. Are you coming? 712 01:10:14,995 --> 01:10:17,236 No! 713 01:10:24,087 --> 01:10:25,918 We'd better keep an eye on that guy. 714 01:10:26,048 --> 01:10:28,755 He looks like a man that would steal our island. 715 01:10:44,149 --> 01:10:46,936 It's uranium! The place is loaded with it. 716 01:10:47,944 --> 01:10:50,105 Uranium? 717 01:10:53,450 --> 01:10:55,736 Which one of you fellas happened to land first on this island? 718 01:10:55,869 --> 01:10:57,985 Let me handle this, fellas. 719 01:10:58,121 --> 01:10:59,361 Why do you ask that? 720 01:10:59,498 --> 01:11:02,080 Because it will determine which nation owns the island. 721 01:11:02,209 --> 01:11:03,415 We all own it. 722 01:11:04,002 --> 01:11:06,163 Of course, of course... You own the island. 723 01:11:06,296 --> 01:11:10,289 You're the real proprietors, but some country has got to claim sovereignty. 724 01:11:11,176 --> 01:11:14,589 International law specifies that an island belongs to the country 725 01:11:14,721 --> 01:11:16,507 whose citizen was first to set foot on it. 726 01:11:16,640 --> 01:11:20,053 - So some country can take our island? - That's right. 727 01:11:20,185 --> 01:11:22,471 And if that country has immigration laws? 728 01:11:22,604 --> 01:11:25,516 - You'll have to abide by those laws. - Even income tax laws? 729 01:11:25,649 --> 01:11:29,517 Income tax laws, inheritance taxes and sales taxes. 730 01:11:29,653 --> 01:11:33,316 You know what they are trying to do? They're trying to take our geraniums. 731 01:11:33,448 --> 01:11:34,984 That's it, exactly! 732 01:11:35,117 --> 01:11:38,154 Pardon us for just one moment! 733 01:11:47,796 --> 01:11:52,005 Let's tell him that we all landed on the island at the same time. 734 01:11:52,134 --> 01:11:56,002 We can't tell a lie. Antoine was the first to land. 735 01:11:56,138 --> 01:11:59,221 - It was a terrible night and... - All right, all right. 736 01:12:05,647 --> 01:12:08,980 Here's how it is. I was the first man to set foot on this island. 737 01:12:09,109 --> 01:12:11,771 - OK. What's your name? - Antoine. 738 01:12:11,903 --> 01:12:15,691 - Antoine what? - Antoine, Master of Cooking. 739 01:12:15,824 --> 01:12:18,110 - Nationality? - I haven't any! 740 01:12:18,243 --> 01:12:21,326 You see, he is what is known as a stateless man. 741 01:12:21,455 --> 01:12:24,322 Or in other words, a misplaced person. 742 01:12:24,458 --> 01:12:27,291 You see, he's lost and he can't find himself. 743 01:12:27,419 --> 01:12:29,831 - Listen, you've got to have a nationality. - You're telling me! 744 01:12:29,963 --> 01:12:32,500 I explained that in every port wherever I tried to land, 745 01:12:32,632 --> 01:12:34,793 but no country wanted to have me. 746 01:12:34,926 --> 01:12:38,043 Every country now will want to have you! 747 01:12:38,180 --> 01:12:41,138 I'll go and radio the authorities and dump it in somebody's lap. 748 01:12:41,266 --> 01:12:42,597 So long, gentlemen. 749 01:12:42,726 --> 01:12:45,388 - Bye, bye... - So long, Lieutenant. 750 01:12:51,651 --> 01:12:54,188 Show in the gentlemen of the press. 751 01:12:59,659 --> 01:13:01,320 Is it true a new island's been discovered? 752 01:13:01,453 --> 01:13:03,318 - Can you give us the facts? - Who does it belong to? 753 01:13:03,455 --> 01:13:05,992 Not so fast, gentlemen. Not so fast. 754 01:13:06,124 --> 01:13:08,661 The island belongs to no one. For the time being. 755 01:13:08,794 --> 01:13:09,829 To no one? 756 01:13:09,961 --> 01:13:11,701 Four shipwrecked men have settled down there, 757 01:13:11,838 --> 01:13:15,251 but the first man who stepped on the island is a stateless person, 758 01:13:15,383 --> 01:13:18,125 a citizen of no nationality. 759 01:13:18,261 --> 01:13:21,879 Consequently, no country is in a position to lay claim to sovereignty on the island. 760 01:13:22,015 --> 01:13:23,175 Is it an important island? 761 01:13:23,308 --> 01:13:27,677 Important? It is loaded with the biggest deposits of uranium discovered to this day. 762 01:13:27,813 --> 01:13:29,394 Uranium? 763 01:13:29,523 --> 01:13:34,108 Shh! Here's the complete file, gentlemen. You can go through it as you please. 764 01:13:39,950 --> 01:13:42,862 Every hour on the hour, this station is giving you up-to-the-minute reports... 765 01:13:47,666 --> 01:13:49,076 The recent discovery in the Pacific... 766 01:13:49,209 --> 01:13:54,499 ...on an island which will be known henceforth as Atoll "H". 767 01:13:54,631 --> 01:13:58,499 I beg your pardon, Atoll K. 768 01:13:58,635 --> 01:14:00,671 After a fortnight of conferences... 769 01:14:00,804 --> 01:14:03,466 ...the great powers, in a joint statement issued today, 770 01:14:03,598 --> 01:14:06,135 announced the appointment of an international commission 771 01:14:06,268 --> 01:14:09,385 to decide which nation will be awarded sovereignty rights 772 01:14:09,521 --> 01:14:12,729 over the island which has emerged from the ocean only a short time ago 773 01:14:12,858 --> 01:14:15,190 and will be known as Atoll "K". 774 01:14:15,318 --> 01:14:18,401 'This statement was welcomed with relief in the world capitals. 775 01:14:18,530 --> 01:14:20,691 'Now it has become only a question of time 776 01:14:20,824 --> 01:14:23,315 'before some government raises its flag over Atoll "K'.' 777 01:14:24,828 --> 01:14:27,410 Some government's flag, they say. 778 01:14:27,539 --> 01:14:28,654 Do you hear that? 779 01:14:28,790 --> 01:14:31,532 Well, why don't we make a government of our own? 780 01:14:31,668 --> 01:14:34,080 Chérie's right! 781 01:14:36,548 --> 01:14:40,712 I'll write a constitution like has never been written before. 782 01:14:41,803 --> 01:14:44,636 Er... sharpen this! 783 01:14:55,817 --> 01:14:59,059 This will have to be a short constitution. 784 01:15:00,780 --> 01:15:02,520 Now... 785 01:15:02,657 --> 01:15:07,526 We, the people of... 786 01:15:09,164 --> 01:15:11,496 Of? 787 01:15:11,625 --> 01:15:13,911 Crusoeland... 788 01:15:17,631 --> 01:15:20,464 ...in order to save our island, 789 01:15:20,592 --> 01:15:26,508 do hereby form a government. 790 01:15:27,724 --> 01:15:29,464 Now, what kind of government do we want? 791 01:15:29,494 --> 01:15:31,494 Very little government would be good, I think. 792 01:15:31,587 --> 01:15:33,552 - Without too many laws. - And no passports. 793 01:15:34,397 --> 01:15:36,353 No passports. 794 01:15:36,483 --> 01:15:39,475 - And no prisons. - No prisons. 795 01:15:39,611 --> 01:15:41,442 No taxes. 796 01:15:43,531 --> 01:15:45,112 What? 797 01:15:46,660 --> 01:15:49,493 - No taxes. - No taxes. 798 01:15:50,538 --> 01:15:53,029 Say, this is getting to be a perfect government. 799 01:15:53,166 --> 01:15:56,829 And I will add "no laws" and "no money". 800 01:15:57,629 --> 01:15:59,165 And that's all we have room for. 801 01:15:59,839 --> 01:16:03,923 Now, the next thing is to hold an election. I vote for myself as President. 802 01:16:04,052 --> 01:16:06,134 And Stanley seconds the motion. 803 01:16:06,262 --> 01:16:09,470 But I'm the discoverer of our island! I vote for me! 804 01:16:09,599 --> 01:16:11,590 - You vote for me too, don't you? - No, no, no, no. 805 01:16:11,726 --> 01:16:13,591 Giovanni, votes only for Giovanni! 806 01:16:14,521 --> 01:16:17,012 The electioneering is over! 807 01:16:21,236 --> 01:16:22,897 Cherie. 808 01:16:23,029 --> 01:16:24,985 Count the votes. 809 01:16:25,115 --> 01:16:27,322 One vote for Giovanni. 810 01:16:27,450 --> 01:16:29,736 One vote for Antoine. 811 01:16:29,869 --> 01:16:32,611 One, two, three... 812 01:16:32,747 --> 01:16:34,533 Three votes for Oliver Crusoe. 813 01:16:34,666 --> 01:16:37,658 The President is elected by a comfortable majority. 814 01:16:42,340 --> 01:16:46,424 As President of Crusoeland, I will now choose my cabinet. 815 01:16:46,553 --> 01:16:49,169 Cherie, you are my Vice President. 816 01:16:49,305 --> 01:16:52,092 Oh, thank you, Mr President. 817 01:16:52,225 --> 01:16:55,137 Antoine, and you are my foreign minister. 818 01:16:55,979 --> 01:16:58,345 I am very proud. 819 01:16:58,481 --> 01:17:01,143 Giovanni, you are the minister of construction. 820 01:17:01,276 --> 01:17:03,733 You couldn't have made a better choice. 821 01:17:04,904 --> 01:17:06,610 Well, that's that! 822 01:17:10,368 --> 01:17:14,987 - What about me? - Stanley, you are the people! 823 01:17:15,123 --> 01:17:17,330 I don't want to be the people. 824 01:17:17,459 --> 01:17:19,495 What do you mean, you don't want to be the people? 825 01:17:19,627 --> 01:17:21,993 There are more of you than there are of us! 826 01:17:22,130 --> 01:17:24,667 - You mean, there's a lot of me? - Certainly! 827 01:17:24,799 --> 01:17:27,632 Oh, well! Why didn't you tell me? I didn't know. 828 01:17:28,887 --> 01:17:31,503 Mr President, but now we will have to have a flag. 829 01:17:32,307 --> 01:17:35,799 Giovanni's right. We can't have a government without a flag. 830 01:17:37,771 --> 01:17:41,480 - Can't we use this as a flag? - That will be perfect! 831 01:17:41,608 --> 01:17:44,065 Yes, but we'll need an emblem. 832 01:17:44,194 --> 01:17:47,152 Wait a second. I have an idea. 833 01:18:30,281 --> 01:18:33,398 It's impossible to keep this house clean. 834 01:18:35,036 --> 01:18:37,277 Look at that. Terrible. 835 01:18:42,585 --> 01:18:44,576 See? The dust did that. 836 01:19:12,574 --> 01:19:14,314 Stan, Ollie! 837 01:19:14,450 --> 01:19:16,156 - What happened? - Looks like we're being invaded. 838 01:19:16,286 --> 01:19:18,117 - What happened? - Take a look at the beach. 839 01:19:33,011 --> 01:19:35,002 Under the principle of self-determination, 840 01:19:35,138 --> 01:19:39,302 the constitution proposed by the government has been ratified by unanimous vote. 841 01:19:40,518 --> 01:19:42,099 We have no other alternative 842 01:19:42,228 --> 01:19:45,891 but to recognise this new sovereign state, the Crusoeland. 843 01:20:33,529 --> 01:20:35,110 Pardon me. 844 01:20:36,282 --> 01:20:38,364 Pardon me. 845 01:20:41,829 --> 01:20:44,286 Oh boy, oh boy, it's great, my boa/Y/abal'sse. 846 01:20:44,415 --> 01:20:48,203 - Waiter, waiter! - Antoine, more boa/Y/abal'sse. 847 01:20:48,336 --> 01:20:50,952 - Poor Antoine. - "Poor Antoine" is right. 848 01:20:56,469 --> 01:20:58,676 - How much do I owe you, buddy? - Nothing. 849 01:20:58,805 --> 01:21:01,012 - Nothing at all? - Oh, absolutely nothing. 850 01:21:01,140 --> 01:21:03,005 This is a free country. 851 01:21:03,142 --> 01:21:05,724 Oh, boy, if I'd known that, I'd have taken a bottle. 852 01:21:05,853 --> 01:21:07,093 Here, take one. 853 01:21:07,230 --> 01:21:10,313 - Er, give him another one, Stanley. - Why, certainly. 854 01:21:10,441 --> 01:21:13,524 Oh, gee, thanks, mister. Thanks a million, mister. 855 01:21:14,737 --> 01:21:16,853 Give me that. 856 01:21:23,496 --> 01:21:25,532 What's the idea of giving that stuff away? 857 01:21:25,665 --> 01:21:28,657 I brought this liquor out here so I could sell it. I want cash. 858 01:21:28,793 --> 01:21:31,205 But money is against the rules of our constitution. 859 01:21:31,337 --> 01:21:34,829 - Yeah, and we have no taxes either. - Oh, yeah? 860 01:21:34,966 --> 01:21:37,082 Taxes I don't care about. 861 01:21:37,218 --> 01:21:39,300 You gotta make money for me, or else! 862 01:21:39,429 --> 01:21:42,296 Out of my way, fatty! 863 01:21:42,432 --> 01:21:44,468 Give me a bottle of cognac. 864 01:21:49,480 --> 01:21:50,640 Which one? 865 01:21:55,570 --> 01:21:57,310 That one. 866 01:22:02,660 --> 01:22:06,027 - I'm sorry, but you'll have to pay for that. - Who said so? 867 01:22:07,248 --> 01:22:08,863 He did. 868 01:22:21,471 --> 01:22:23,757 What are you having? 869 01:22:23,890 --> 01:22:26,472 - You! - Let me go. You can't do that. 870 01:22:26,601 --> 01:22:29,263 They say it's a free country here. 871 01:22:29,395 --> 01:22:33,013 As President of this island I demand that you desist. 872 01:22:33,149 --> 01:22:34,229 Ow! 873 01:22:41,074 --> 01:22:42,109 Ow! 874 01:22:42,241 --> 01:22:43,947 Do that again! 875 01:22:47,872 --> 01:22:50,033 You keep out of this, nitwit! 876 01:22:50,166 --> 01:22:52,327 I'll have you thrown off of this island for that! 877 01:22:52,460 --> 01:22:53,996 Yeah, we'll have you imported! 878 01:22:54,128 --> 01:22:57,541 If I were you, my fine friends, I wouldn't be too sure. 879 01:22:59,300 --> 01:23:00,961 See you later. 880 01:23:02,136 --> 01:23:03,467 Gentlemen. 881 01:23:03,596 --> 01:23:07,009 I'll have him thrown off of this island if it's the last thing I do. 882 01:23:07,141 --> 01:23:08,347 That's not possible. 883 01:23:08,476 --> 01:23:10,467 - Why not? - Because we have no such laws. 884 01:23:10,516 --> 01:23:14,029 Yes, that would be pretty difficult. We'd be forced to change the constitution. 885 01:23:14,063 --> 01:23:17,683 If you want my advice, Mr President, call a meeting of the cabinet. 886 01:23:17,819 --> 01:23:19,730 That's a good idea. Come on. 887 01:23:19,862 --> 01:23:22,319 We'll attend to that right now! 888 01:23:23,658 --> 01:23:25,774 Enjoy yourself, folks. We'll be right back. 889 01:23:30,373 --> 01:23:34,036 This island is a paradise governed by idiots. 890 01:23:34,168 --> 01:23:37,752 A man like me could put himself in power 891 01:23:37,880 --> 01:23:42,123 and lay his hands on a chunk of money, just think of it! 892 01:23:42,260 --> 01:23:43,761 Do you want to come in on it with me? 893 01:23:43,786 --> 01:23:46,002 Sounds all right, but what are the people going to say? 894 01:23:46,072 --> 01:23:47,899 They are happy with things the way they are. 895 01:23:47,974 --> 01:23:50,135 The people! Bah! 896 01:23:50,268 --> 01:23:52,259 We'll just tell them they're not happy. 897 01:23:52,395 --> 01:23:54,351 They're always ready to believe that. 898 01:23:54,480 --> 01:23:56,937 We'll have to organise a few demonstrations, 899 01:23:57,066 --> 01:24:00,183 just to show them how dangerous it is to live without laws. 900 01:24:00,319 --> 01:24:01,729 I'm afraid you're late. 901 01:24:01,863 --> 01:24:03,819 The President has just put up a proclamation 902 01:24:03,948 --> 01:24:07,236 declaring that from now on, law and order will be the rule. 903 01:24:30,349 --> 01:24:31,930 It sure is quiet out there. 904 01:24:32,059 --> 01:24:35,051 That's because I showed a firm hand with our proclamation. 905 01:24:40,735 --> 01:24:42,771 Come on! Read that! 906 01:24:49,744 --> 01:24:52,656 Now I'll make a tour round the island and test the public's reaction. 907 01:24:55,833 --> 01:24:58,324 You don't have to. They're coming to visit you. 908 01:24:58,461 --> 01:24:59,667 They're coming to apologise. 909 01:24:59,754 --> 01:25:04,214 I knew that would bring them to their senses. 910 01:25:09,972 --> 01:25:13,135 - Who wrote that? - He did! 911 01:25:15,144 --> 01:25:16,759 Ow! 912 01:25:16,896 --> 01:25:19,888 - I now put you under arrest! - But he's the President. 913 01:25:20,024 --> 01:25:22,481 He certainly is. 914 01:25:24,737 --> 01:25:26,523 Why don't you hang him? 915 01:25:26,656 --> 01:25:30,069 You have just given me an excellent idea. 916 01:25:30,201 --> 01:25:32,237 As defender of law and order, 917 01:25:32,370 --> 01:25:35,157 I can guarantee you will have a fair and honest trial. 918 01:25:35,873 --> 01:25:40,993 You will confess everything and then you will be hanged like gentlemen, at sunrise. 919 01:25:41,128 --> 01:25:42,459 Thank you very much. 920 01:25:43,506 --> 01:25:44,996 Er... 921 01:25:46,384 --> 01:25:47,965 What'd he say? 922 01:25:48,094 --> 01:25:50,756 Why don't you keep your big mouth shut? 923 01:25:50,888 --> 01:25:52,970 Are you going to hang her, too? 924 01:25:53,099 --> 01:25:54,805 Of course not. 925 01:25:54,934 --> 01:25:57,220 She is much too beautiful. 926 01:25:57,353 --> 01:25:59,935 If you will consent, my dear, 927 01:26:03,859 --> 01:26:05,975 What can I say, but "thank you"? 928 01:26:06,112 --> 01:26:08,694 I can't believe my ears. 929 01:26:08,823 --> 01:26:12,691 Well, if you can't believe those ears, you can't believe anything. 930 01:26:12,827 --> 01:26:14,533 Put some guards around the house. 931 01:26:14,662 --> 01:26:17,995 I'll immediately go and start a crew building a gallows. 932 01:26:18,124 --> 01:26:23,494 Oh, by the way... Now that I'm going to be President, I'll need that outfit. 933 01:26:23,629 --> 01:26:27,292 - Will you accompany me, my dear? - But of course. 934 01:26:36,100 --> 01:26:39,263 - I still can't believe my... - Oh, shut up! 935 01:26:39,395 --> 01:26:40,601 Mmh! 936 01:26:51,824 --> 01:26:54,611 See if the guards are still out there. 937 01:27:09,050 --> 01:27:10,540 He missed me! 938 01:27:21,354 --> 01:27:22,844 'Attention! Attention! 939 01:27:22,980 --> 01:27:25,562 'Commander in chief, geographic station Tahiti. 940 01:27:25,691 --> 01:27:28,273 'calling Lieutenant Frazer. SS Aria. 941 01:27:28,402 --> 01:27:32,736 'Report your position. 8:30am, wavelength 15 metres. Over.' 942 01:27:32,865 --> 01:27:35,902 It was lucky I was hired to come here as a radio operator. 943 01:27:37,620 --> 01:27:40,157 Which reminds me, he was just looking for you, Alecto. 944 01:27:40,289 --> 01:27:41,699 Huh? 945 01:27:42,541 --> 01:27:45,533 - Where is he? - Er, over there. 946 01:27:50,424 --> 01:27:54,508 Hello. Lieutenant Frazer. Lieutenant Frazer! 947 01:27:58,307 --> 01:28:00,889 Lieutenant, it's for you. 948 01:28:03,771 --> 01:28:05,056 Sounds like a dame. 949 01:28:05,189 --> 01:28:07,145 Lieutenant Frazer. Lieutenant Frazer! 950 01:28:07,775 --> 01:28:10,938 Hello, Snow White. Don't tell me the dwarves are annoying you. 951 01:28:11,070 --> 01:28:12,810 Hello, Jack. Oh, listen to me. 952 01:28:12,947 --> 01:28:15,154 You've got to come right away. They've started a revolution. 953 01:28:15,282 --> 01:28:17,489 They've built the gallows. They're going to hang everyone. 954 01:28:17,618 --> 01:28:19,529 I need you! Do you hear me? 955 01:28:20,287 --> 01:28:22,369 Change your course, 20 points to starboard. 956 01:28:26,001 --> 01:28:29,414 Of course I can hear you, but you don't really need me. 957 01:28:29,547 --> 01:28:32,254 But Jack, don't kid me. There isn't a minute to lose. 958 01:28:32,383 --> 01:28:34,214 - if you love me... - (Ringleader) You two! 959 01:28:34,343 --> 01:28:38,461 Round up everybody and tell them the traitors to the government of Crusoeland 960 01:28:38,597 --> 01:28:40,508 will be hanged within the hour. 961 01:28:40,641 --> 01:28:43,804 And now let's get the principal actors a little opera. 962 01:28:53,946 --> 01:28:57,234 One, two, three, four... 963 01:28:57,366 --> 01:28:59,072 Let's go! 964 01:30:24,495 --> 01:30:26,656 - Get away! Quick! - Is this another one of your tricks? 965 01:30:26,789 --> 01:30:29,906 - What do you mean, tricks? - Tricks! Sure, she's full of them. 966 01:30:30,042 --> 01:30:33,079 - We go outside and the guards shoot us. - You're wrong! 967 01:30:33,212 --> 01:30:35,328 I just got rid of the guards outside. 968 01:30:35,464 --> 01:30:37,546 I put a stone in my purse. 969 01:30:37,675 --> 01:30:38,960 Oh! 970 01:30:39,093 --> 01:30:43,177 I went with Alecto only because one of us had to remain free to save the others. 971 01:30:43,305 --> 01:30:45,796 - What are we waiting for? - Come on! 972 01:30:46,642 --> 01:30:49,759 - No. I'm staying here. - But we can't leave you here! 973 01:30:49,830 --> 01:30:51,997 I've got to stay here and send them in the other direction. 974 01:30:52,022 --> 01:30:55,935 - Thank you very much, Miss. - Oh, no, hurry up! Hurry up! 975 01:31:21,343 --> 01:31:23,550 - How did it happen? - I haven't got time to explain! 976 01:31:23,679 --> 01:31:26,386 You've got to run and try and catch those brutes. 977 01:31:26,515 --> 01:31:29,006 But did you notice which way they went? 978 01:31:29,143 --> 01:31:30,553 That way! 979 01:31:30,686 --> 01:31:32,176 Follow me! 980 01:31:45,618 --> 01:31:47,324 Come on! 981 01:31:57,671 --> 01:31:59,832 Follow me! 982 01:32:14,647 --> 01:32:16,638 Hurry up! They went this way! 983 01:32:27,618 --> 01:32:30,109 - Hey, look at that! - Oh! 984 01:32:46,679 --> 01:32:48,044 I think we're safe here. 985 01:32:49,390 --> 01:32:51,005 Don't you? 986 01:33:02,653 --> 01:33:04,769 He must have fainted. 987 01:33:19,044 --> 01:33:21,456 What happened? 988 01:33:29,054 --> 01:33:30,169 Cherie! 989 01:33:30,639 --> 01:33:31,674 Oh! 990 01:33:31,807 --> 01:33:33,672 It's Cherie! 991 01:33:38,939 --> 01:33:41,180 Stan, answer me. Forgive me. 992 01:33:41,316 --> 01:33:43,932 I didn't know it was you. Please, look at me. 993 01:33:46,113 --> 01:33:48,695 - How did you manage to catch them? - But I... I... 994 01:33:50,284 --> 01:33:55,574 The girl is absolutely wonderful. She has a stone in her bag! (Laughs) 995 01:33:56,081 --> 01:33:57,662 Quick! Get them out! 996 01:33:57,791 --> 01:34:00,248 We're going to give the signal for the show to begin. 997 01:34:00,919 --> 01:34:03,160 As a token of thanks for your help, 998 01:34:03,297 --> 01:34:05,788 without which I could never have succeeded, 999 01:34:05,924 --> 01:34:09,007 I am giving you the honour of pulling the lever 1000 01:34:09,136 --> 01:34:12,628 that will drop these traitors into eternity. 1001 01:34:23,067 --> 01:34:26,685 Alecto! Alecto! This girl is in cahoots with the traitors! 1002 01:34:26,820 --> 01:34:28,731 Look where he's standing. 1003 01:34:28,864 --> 01:34:32,072 - What are you talking about? - She overpowered us and let them escape! 1004 01:34:32,618 --> 01:34:35,030 Argh! Argh! 1005 01:35:43,021 --> 01:35:44,977 I don't get it. I've just been checking. 1006 01:35:45,107 --> 01:35:48,270 We're exactly on the position where the island stood. 1007 01:35:51,071 --> 01:35:53,653 'This is what you'd call a lucky break.' 1008 01:35:56,285 --> 01:35:59,573 - Oh, no! - What do you mean, "no"? 1009 01:35:59,705 --> 01:36:02,287 - I don't want to be rescued by him! - Why not? 1010 01:36:02,416 --> 01:36:04,156 He was too long getting here! 1011 01:36:04,293 --> 01:36:06,705 'This world of ours is definitely no fair place, 1012 01:36:06,837 --> 01:36:09,453 'but people go on living just the same. 1013 01:36:09,590 --> 01:36:12,172 'Cherie Lamour is finally marrying her Lieutenant, 1014 01:36:12,301 --> 01:36:16,135 'and they look forward to many years of happily married life.' 1015 01:36:16,263 --> 01:36:19,221 Do you take for your wedded wife Miss Cherie Lamour? 1016 01:36:19,349 --> 01:36:21,510 - OK, OK! - Right, right. 1017 01:36:21,643 --> 01:36:24,476 - I now pronounce you man and wife. - It was you who jilted me! 1018 01:36:24,605 --> 01:36:25,845 - ljilted you, you say? - Yes! 1019 01:36:25,981 --> 01:36:28,222 'Giovanni has gone back to his native Italy. 1020 01:36:28,358 --> 01:36:32,818 'lnstead of building marble palaces, he'll go on forever building fences. 1021 01:36:33,906 --> 01:36:37,023 'Antoine has been brought back to the boat from which he ran away. 1022 01:36:37,159 --> 01:36:39,525 'Still anxious to give up this life of wandering, 1023 01:36:39,661 --> 01:36:42,744 'he tries once more his usual means of escape. 1024 01:36:42,873 --> 01:36:46,661 'But this time he's gotten into the wrong sort of cage.' 1025 01:36:54,843 --> 01:36:56,424 'As for our two heroes, 1026 01:36:56,553 --> 01:37:00,216 'after all their mishaps, they've finally gotten their inheritance - 1027 01:37:00,349 --> 01:37:02,715 'their own South Sea island. 1028 01:37:02,851 --> 01:37:06,435 'And there, far away from all the cares of the world, 1029 01:37:06,563 --> 01:37:09,270 'they settle down to a well-earned rest.' 1030 01:37:09,399 --> 01:37:12,106 Gee, that was sure was nice of Frazer and Cherie 1031 01:37:12,236 --> 01:37:15,023 to land us here on our own real island. 1032 01:37:15,155 --> 01:37:17,988 Give us all this food and everything. 1033 01:37:18,116 --> 01:37:21,529 - Just like a fresh start in life. - It certainly is. 1034 01:37:21,662 --> 01:37:25,246 And they're going to bring us new supplies every six months. 1035 01:37:25,374 --> 01:37:28,207 At last, all of our troubles are over. 1036 01:37:28,335 --> 01:37:33,204 Yes, sir. Nothing to do from now on but eat and sleep. 1037 01:37:33,340 --> 01:37:36,423 And nobody to tell us what to do. 1038 01:37:39,304 --> 01:37:42,171 - What are you doing here? - What are we doing here? 1039 01:37:42,307 --> 01:37:44,263 This is our island! 1040 01:37:44,393 --> 01:37:45,553 There must be some mistake. 1041 01:37:45,686 --> 01:37:47,642 This island has been taken over by the government 1042 01:37:47,771 --> 01:37:49,636 for insufficient payment of inheritance taxes. 1043 01:37:49,773 --> 01:37:52,139 Moreover, you've also been fined for the delay. 1044 01:37:53,026 --> 01:37:55,483 It's my duty to seize your supplies and food. 1045 01:37:55,612 --> 01:37:57,523 Take it away! 1046 01:38:04,871 --> 01:38:08,989 Well, here's another nice mess you've gotten me into! 1047 01:38:09,126 --> 01:38:12,789 Well, I couldn't help it.. You're always blaming me for everything. 1048 01:38:12,921 --> 01:38:15,754 I didn't know... 78574

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