All language subtitles for Here To Climb (2024)

Climbing's always
been my first love.

Sasha showing some finesse.

Since I was 16, I've been in
the limelight of climbing.

No question, the best female
climber in our country.

I love the winning.

First place, Sasha DiGiulian.

People were like,
Sasha DiGiulian,

this little kid that's
crushing everything.

Every time I climb, it's like
you fall, you fall, you fall.

Slam into the
wall, and it hurts.

Kinda frustrated.

I learned in order to capitalize

on your achievements,
you need to capture them.

Social media changed the game.

This is Sasha
DiGiulian tuning in.

It's like a level of intimacy

that never existed
in climbing before.

She changed the
face of climbing.

The fact that I'm marketable...

Is my hair okay?

Kind of not, but.

Enables me to do what I do
and make a living off of it.

Once you share yourself
with the world,

people are going to
have a problem with you.

But if you have haters,

that's how you know you made it.

Her definition of success
is that she gets to the top.

You have such an
incredible career.

She's so polarizing.

I don't know how much of Sasha
is a crafted public persona.

She doesn't look like a climber.

Some people say, "Why are
you sexualizing the sport?"

People criticize her and
call her dumb and anorexic.

Sasha's story is amazing.

That's why it's so frustrating

when Sasha overhypes
some ascents.

If you omit certain details,

people are going
to be suspicious.

It's bullshit.

I just play the game.

Okay, don't mess this up.

You know what to do.

Right, left, pull, foot up,

push, push, push.

Make it up there,
make it up there.

Very good.

Whoo.

Yes, summit.

Our anchor.

- Yeah.
- Nice.

And it's not dark.

It's not dark. Yeah.

Only almost.
- Almost.

No, we got time.
- Yeah.

All right, so I'm
going to tie you in.

Lynn started out as my idol,

the woman that I grew up
with a poster of on my wall

in my childhood bedroom.

Yes, with one direction.
Here's the X, see?

Then she became a friend...

That's how I'm going to tie in.

And a mentor.

- Tying to the end here.
- Yeah.

As long as we trust
that one sling.

We can have a backup, though.
- Yeah.

Lynn did this epic feat

of climbing the Nose on El Cap.

And the Nose had never been done

by a man or a woman before.

She did it over four days.

Then the next
year, she came back

and did it in a single day.

And then she made
this famous quip...

Good setup.

And I saw that as just...

I want to do something
like that one day.

- Hasta la vista.
- Whoo-hoo.

It's going to be
an exciting rappel.

Lynn comes from this

traditional climbing background,

grew up really in the
outdoor environment.

And I grew up climbing in a gym.

I started climbing when
I was six years old.

My brother had a birthday party

at a climbing gym
called Sportrock

in Alexandria, Virginia.

What I remember was walking in,

the gym smelling,
like, musty, dirty feet

and a slight tinge of pizza.

I really liked it.

I kept going back in line
to have another turn.

Sasha quickly
progressed from being

a child who liked to climb
to being a competitor.

What's your strategy today?

Two things: to win

and to climb as many races
I can so I get 1,000 bucks.

She loved the gym competitions.

She excelled in them.

It became obvious that

she wanted to be
serious about that.

- I loved winning.
- Yeah!

Winning my first
continental championships,

winning my first nationals,

it was, like, the
greatest feeling.

I met Sasha when
she was, I think,

like 14 or 15 years old.

We both lived in D.C.

and were climbing in
the same climbing gym.

And she was the little squirt

that was warming
up on my projects.

Yeah, she definitely stood out.

When Sasha was
building her career,

she was a young, attractive,
blonde, blue-eyed girl

doing some really cool things.

She loves climbing,

but she uses it
to make a living.

It's impressive.

- I want to see that logo.
- Oh, yeah.

It's just bunched on this side.

So maybe just pull your
jacket down and fold it.

Just curl it up or something.
- Oh, okay.

Since I had achieved
at that point

what I wanted to achieve
in indoor climbing

and I started using
my winter breaks

and summer breaks to
be outside on rock.

I never kind of ventured into
this new world unknown before.

The following summer,
I did my first big wall

with Edu Marin, who is a
professional Spanish climber.

Bella Vista was classified

as the hardest big wall
achieved by a woman.

It was my first female
ascent of a big wall,

proving to myself that
anything was possible.

It's a serious endeavor
to climb a big wall,

and it requires a lot
of technical knowledge

and mental fortitude and
then, of course, the strength.

Sport climbing is a very
individualistic pursuit.

Big wall climbing
is about teamwork

and about partnership.

So it was a big
transition for Sasha

because you can't do it
all by yourself anymore.

And the list of things
that could go wrong...

Is pretty much infinite.

My next climb was the Eiger.

The route that I
wanted to do was

one of the hardest
established routes

on the north face of the Eiger,

and it had never been
done by a woman before.

That was exciting to me.

I wanted to do something
that was record-breaking.

And I told my sponsors about it

and they were instantly
really excited

and put in the resources to
filming and making it happen.

I saw the climb
that I wanted to do

on the north face of the Eiger

as something that was
under the grade level

that I climbed.

I thought, like,
"What's the big deal?"

There's a lot to
big wall climbing

that you don't know
until you're out there.

And all of it I was learning
while literally there.

My climbing partner
was Carlo Traversi,

and we were going
through these pockets

of really bad weather,
running out of time,

so we changed routes
to something easier.

And it was still a
first female ascent.

I was like, adjust
course, secure a summit.

So all of a sudden,
I come back home

and there's so much hype.

Sasha DiGiulian has just become

the first woman to free-climb
the north face of the Eiger.

The first woman ever to
scale the Murder Wall.

Just days before
starting her senior year

at Columbia University,
DiGiulian reached the summit.

My proudest achievement
in my career yet.

It's the hardest route on
the 5,000-foot north face,

and DiGiulian has made
the first female ascent.

My main focus in climbing...

When you're trying to make
a living off your sport

and getting media attention,
you're not going to say no.

I've proven to myself that

something that I didn't know
was possible was possible.

Yes.

Whoo!

It makes your career grow.

But the climbing community
was basically like,

"What the fuck?"

I feel like every
big thing she's done,

there's always the
weird asterisk,

always weird rumors, and
maybe that's people hating.

Maybe that's people
being sexist.

The toughest thing for
me about the criticism

that I got from
the Eiger was that

it was actually more
grounded in fact.

It wasn't that big of a feat.

Carlo Traversi, my
climbing partner,

was never mentioned
in the press.

I was like this outsider
coming into this world

that was highly protected

and all of a sudden,
getting a lot of attention

for something that
felt overhyped.

So all of this critique

made me want to just keep
making a bigger splash.

I just saw the negative
as like, watch me.

I'll keep going.

Hello.

How do you feel?

Not bad.

I'm really competitive.

Little bit sandy.

And I also love
feeling in control.

What I love about
climbing is in many ways,

I've always been in
control of my own success.

Like, what I get out
of it is up to me.

I was racking up first ascents
and first female ascents

with male professional climbers.

And that's how
I've kind of grown

and expanded in my skill set.

We would push each
other really hard,

pushing my comfort zone.

The spring of 2018, I set
out on this crazy objective

of climbing three of
Canada's hardest big walls.

But I broke up with
my climbing partner.

Ah.

And I ended up
doing it on my own

with the support of Blairs.

Whoo!

After that, I was like,
"Whoa, I feel limitless."

We did it!

Yeah!

I'd put to bed these whispers

of me needing a male
climbing partner

to help get up these walls.

Oh, my God.

Way to go, team!

- Whoo-hoo!
- Whoo!

It was very empowering
in the sense

that I knew I had the
skills and the capacity

to lead an all-female
team on an expedition.

I guess, yeah.

It was really cool to see

Sash coming off of the trilogy,

and she really wanted
her next big expedition

to be an all-female team.

Tricams that Lynn gave me.

Sash wants to prove

that she's one of
the most successful

female climbers in the world
and one of the most successful

big wall female
climbers in the world,

which is an even more
rarefied group of individuals.

Okay.

This is the climb
that we're trying.

It's Leve Leve by
the Pou brothers.

This is all
super-vegetated terrain.

And the rock, it's hard to tell

how it is since
it's so overgrown.

I decided to self-fund
the expedition.

The goal is to be
the first woman

to climb a route
up Pico Cao Grande,

which was the largest
volcanic plug in the world.

I just wanted to go there
with a climbing partner

that I felt comfortable
with and trusted.

Oh, man.

Holy epic-ness.

And you're literally
entrusting your lives

into each other's hands,

and you're all working
together towards this goal.

Oh, my God. Like, it's
like... it's there.

It's so crazy.
- It's there. We're here.

Like, we're looking at
this thing at a picture

in my house, and, like...

When I got the call from
Sasha to go to Africa,

I was over the moon.

When I first saw
Pico Cao Grande,

I was floored.
It was beautiful.

I met Angela on the Upper
Peninsula of Michigan

on an ice climbing trip.

I was pretty green
to ice climbing,

and Angela really mentored me.

The rock.

Oh, I'm so pumped.

God.

And then... oh, dude!

There's the bolt. First bolt.
- Where?

After that crack system.

- Is that the face?
- Yeah.

That way.

My thoughts were that Angela
and I would swap leads,

and essentially I would lead
the harder-graded climbs,

and she would lead more
of the adventure terrain.

Oh, the rock.

Jungle.

I'm spider-webby.
- It's really gravelly.

I fought a lot of
spiders coming up.

You're a little dirty.

Sharp rock.

And it's pouring rain, and
I'm getting a little...

- Yeah, we're getting misted.
- Breeze.

Niagara Falls over here.

From the moment we touched
down on the ground,

it was just rain.

When it rains,

the likelihood of
rockfall goes way up.

That's a whole
different level of risk

that I never accounted for.

Not normal protocol
to climb in the rain.

Oh.

My fucking feet won't
even stay on the holds.

Like, this is like
such mossy bullshit.

I'm not sure how wet this
climb is going to be.

It feels like it's one
of the only options.

Right now.

You got that.

Oh, everything's so
wet. Holy smokes.

Sasha is one of the most
driven people I've ever met.

It helps her achieve the goals
that she sets for herself.

And I do believe that
she finds self-worth

and self-value in those
goals that she creates.

Oh, no! Fucker!

On the grasp!

No fucking way!

Ah!

Yes.

Yes.

Whoo!

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

First pitch.

But, man, that was a
fight through the mud.

I just don't know if we're
going to get a weather window.

Well, then I'm probably
not going to go to the top

if we don't get
a weather window.

Yeah, I mean, it is
shitty to be, like,

the only one trying
to, like, push our,

like, momentum forward.

Like I said, I'm super willing

to go up there with you.

I just, like, want
you to be doing it

for the right reasons, girl.

Like, I want you to...

I'm, like, perfectly aware of
my... my, like, risk-taking.

I just, like, if I feel
like something's sketchy,

I come down.

And my only point is that

we don't know until
we check it out.

Rock!

You guys okay?

Angela!

I'm okay.

A TV-sized block
coming off is, like,

not cool.

There was rockfall that almost
killed our photographer.

And that was a very
high point of tension

because Sasha didn't think
anything had gone wrong

because nobody was hurt.

My life partner of many years

went on an expedition
to Pakistan.

And he never came home.

That dramatically
changed the way

that I see the
world of climbing.

I was bold, and that's
how I got my name.

And now I'm very far from bold.

I just don't really
want anyone to die.

So no one dies on this route,

it's going to be a sweet summit.

Somebody dies, I'm going
to be super-bummed.

That's kind of where I'm at.

If you feel like
you going up there

is like you dying,

then of course,
I can't push you.

I just have confidence
that we can reach the top

and that we can
mitigate the risk.

I mean, I don't know
what you want me to say.

At the end of that evening,
Sasha went into her tent

and uploaded the GoPro
footage to Instagram.

Rock!

You guys okay?

Angela!

Last night, my ego
was getting in the way

of making a clear decision.

I woke up this morning feeling
like this is against my ethic

and not the example
I want to set.

What hurts right
now is I feel like

all of the preparation I did,

and as much as I
wanted something,

it's just not possible.

And this is the first...

this is the first
mission of mine,

the first big wall
that I've gone on

on a trip that I
haven't succeeded on.

I was at fault for
the failed expedition

because I was supposed to be

keeping everyone in good spirit.

I wasn't empathetic
to their feelings.

I wasn't the expedition leader
that they needed me to be.

All right!

We put six bolts in today.

All right, let's try.
Let's go down one more.

It was the first trip that
someone was telling me no,

and, like, I didn't like that.

All right, I'll come down.

Growing up, I wanted to
do everything by myself.

I wasn't naturally that
much of a team player.

For instance, my mom
learned how to belay

so that I could maximize
my time climbing

and do laps.

I was just game to help
out in any way I could.

And that turned
into belaying Sasha

so that she didn't take time
belaying another climber.

She didn't really
climb with anyone else.

It was just her mom.

And so all she did was climb.

Usually when you're climbing,
you have your partner

and you take your breaks,
you know, and you rest.

But for Sasha, it was
just like up and down,

up and down, up and down.

Go, Sasha!

Elite athletes
have to have drive.

You have to be selfish.

Like, you have to be thinking
about how to elevate yourself.

My mom, she loved
being a part of it.

But my dad, he was busy working.

Didn't come to my
climbing competitions.

He didn't really
understand climbing.

He was scared that
I would go off

and become a dirtbag
and not go to college.

I wanted to prove to him

that climbing was
a legitimate sport

like tennis and hockey and
that I could make a living

off of this sport that I loved.

What my dad did connect
with was me winning.

I could say, "Here's
my gold medal."

And he would beam
with a sense of pride.

Our little tradition was

my dad would bring
me to the airport.

We'd talk about things

that have nothing
to do with climbing.

And whenever he dropped me off,

he'd say, "Have fun, be
safe, and do your best."

It's such a beautiful formation.

For Sasha and I to
do a new route here

would be a great
achievement for us,

but also a gift to the climbers.

Once we've got it all
bolted, the fun part starts.

That's why I wanted Sasha
to be a part of this,

because we can do something
for the community of Boulder

and all the climbers that
are looking for new routes

about that level of difficulty.

Sasha is a young woman
who's still figuring it out.

My feet are actually still warm.

We share similar goals
when it comes to climbing.

- We're in climbing shoes.
- Yeah.

Once you decide to do something,

there's no backing down.

That's just part
of our character,

and it's part of what
makes us good climbers.

But we come from a
completely different culture.

The world is a lot
different today

than it was when I was her age.

Back in the days when I
was climbing the big walls

of Yosemite as, like,
an 18-, 19-year-old,

I met this group of climbers

that are now known
as the Stonemasters.

They were pushing the level
of free climbing in America

and finding the routes
that were harder

than what had already been done.

It was a very inclusive group,

people from different
walks of life.

And where we were bonded was
in our love for climbing.

My first female
climbing partner,

Mari Gingery, she and I were
pretty much the only women

in this group of men.

It took a while for
people to understand

that climbing is
actually a sport

and that women can do it.

We do what we think
we're capable of.

So we're telling
ourselves stories,

and the story you tell yourself
is the most important one.

I was just enjoying
being out there

and hanging out with these
people that like to have fun

and just do crazy things.

It was a really
beautiful time in my life

where I felt free and
on the edge of something

that nobody else really
cared, but we cared.

Then I was part of the
first generation of climbers

that got to experience
competition.

And that was very
controversial at first.

Some climbers on one
side that would say

climbing is not a
competitive sport

and how would we judge who's
the best climber anyway?

The only way I was really
making money was prize money.

When I asked the organizers
if the men and women

were getting paid the
same for prize money,

they just said, "Well,
women will get paid the same

if they climb without
their tops on."

When I retired
from competitions,

I decided to do
one last big climb,

the first free ascent
of the most famous route

in the middle of El
Capitan called the Nose.

People said it couldn't be done.

And when people say
it can't be done,

that's when I get
most motivated.

Oh, really? It can't be done?

Who would ever say that?

Why would you ever say
something can't be done?

It's just a matter of
finding the way to do it.

Lynn Hill is a legend
amongst climbers.

This morning, a woman
adventure writer Jon Krakauer

called, quote, "Not
just one of the best

female climbers, but one
of the all-time greats."

The first part says,

"Someday, some guy is
going to free the Nose."

Yeah

And at the bottom, it
says, "It goes, boys."

That's amazing.

Yeah.

You know that's the poster
of you that I grew up with?

It was signed by you.

Yeah.
- Now, this is really funny.

This photo was taken
when I was probably 19.

So they came out to Joshua
Tree and they're like,

"Who wants to get
some free schwag

and take a few photos with us?"

And so I said, "Sure."

So they gave me those
stand up shorts.

I did get sponsored later,

but I wasn't making
enough money to survive

and be a mother.

I always had to
do a side hustle.

And it just got really tiring

to have to always be
answering to a sponsor,

have a side hustle,
and be a mom.

There's a young Sasha.

"Kids of Climbing."
- Yeah.

- How old were you then?
- 2007.

Because of people like Lynn

who really pioneered the sport,

my generation gets to actually

make a living doing
what you love.

Oh, my goodness, Little Sasha.

I want women to have
equal access to equity

and equality in sport.

It's not about the money.

Money enables you freedom,

and freedom enables you
to do what you want to do.

I took a very business-forward
approach to my career.

And even from a young age,
I had brand principles

and a mission
statement of who I was.

I remember writing out

the mission statement
of Sasha DiGiulian.

I always looked at
professional climbing

as basically similar
to dumpster diving.

Get in there and see
what you can find.

Sasha was just really good
at diving in the dumpster.

I don't...

I said yes to everything.

Tires, makeup brands,
fitness trackers.

Did a deal with Seamless,
which was awesome

because I was in college

and it was like free
delivery for a year.

She's a businesswoman.
She's a self-marketer.

She's the OG millennial
influencer pro climber.

One of the first
people to really

be Insta-famous in
our climbing community

and have a huge following

and be able to
leverage and use that

in ways that were to her benefit

but also became
extremely isolating.

Agent Provocateur approached me

about being a part
of this new campaign,

embracing strength
as not mutually

exclusive from femininity.

It was a fun experience

and one of the most ridiculous
things that I've done.

But I'm, like, pretty
happy that I did it.

Sometimes she's
critiqued by, you know,

the trolls on the internet.

The culture that I came from,

people didn't boast
about themselves.

There was no social media.

They were very discreet,
and if anything,

understated and humble.

And if you see somebody who's
the opposite of that, you know,

the tendency is to
tear that person down.

I love to climb hard, and
I also love to wear pink.

I love to be outside,
but I also love

to stay in a five-star hotel.

Being true to myself and not
having to dampen my shine

is maybe why I cause friction,

but I'm human, so I'm
always going to be

affected by negative comments.

I have spent a lot of
time anguishing over what

other people think about me.

I went through a really
public cyberbullying incident

that came from a
long saga of someone

in our community mocking,
essentially, me being obese.

And I crafted a post about it.

What resulted in that was fury
towards me and towards him.

I have been dealing with
someone who has treated me

poorly through harassment,
online and offline,

over the last eight years.

And I exposed something
that was posted online.

And my opinion
about social media

is that what is posted
online is posted

to a public forum.

Whether from a public
account or a private account,

we all have to face the
accountability of our actions.

She fought back,

fucking nuked him
on social media.

That person lost their
entire livelihood.

People had a hard
time with that fact,

because it was a
well-loved person

in the climbing community.

Something that Sasha will
always be associated with

and never escape,
but at the same time,

she was right to
stand up for herself.

I'm glad I stood up for myself.

But I felt like an outsider
within my own community.

The way that I deal
with things is trying

to compartmentalize what is
going on under the surface.

Because my job is to be
a professional climber.

And if I'm not climbing
something of significance

each year, like,
I feel inadequate

and not deserving of
the support that I have.

Seeing pressure as a reason

to hit the gas harder is...

has always been my mentality.

She has unbelievable goals
that are going to push her

mentally and physically
and push female climbing

and push climbing in general.

She also is very aware of the
fact that she's getting older,

and she's aware
of what transpires

and how brand relationships
transition as you get older

and maybe you become
slightly less relevant.

She is very much
grasping with like, well,

what does it mean if some
day I'm not as relevant?

And I think she's thinking
of all that emotionally,

and I think she's also
thinking about it financially.

I'm in the prime of my career,

and I want to take advantage
of that as much as possible.

And that's going after
these first female ascents.

When I see a woman
has done a climb,

it all of a sudden connects
the dots that it's like,

oh, wow, if she did
it, I can do it.

And so in a way,
it kind of opens

this floodgate of possibility.

Sao Tome didn't work
out, and I came home

hungry to go and lead
another big wall,

all-female expedition.

And that came in the form
of Logical Progression,

the most badass sport
big wall in the world,

a 3,000-foot face
climb up a monolith

called El Gigante in Mexico.

The route hadn't
been free-climbed

by a woman before.

And all the men that had done it

were these big names
that I respected,

like Josh Wharton, Alex Honnold,

Sonnie Trotter, Hayden Kennedy.

I was dead set on going
there and trying it.

The Logical Progression
will suit you really well,

because it's, like,
techy vert fingery.

And it's like technical and
sort of meander back and forth.

But overall, I remember
the whole route basically

being small edges up the face.

- Okay, so like...
- You know, like... like,

miles of just creeping
up a vertical wall.

- Climb vertical...
- Yeah.

And then I remember
that the first pitches

is are more thought-provoking
than the rating would imply.

You know, you're like, "Oh,
11-A, that'll be fast."

And then you get up
there, you're like,

"Where are the holds?"
It's all confusing.

Yeah.

If someone's a
professional climber,

you can kind of tell by the
way they move on a rock.

That's how I judge a
professional climber

is if they can just show up
at the crag and climb well.

Boy.

Sasha definitely has that.

You watch her climb,
and you can tell

that she's really good at it.

I think I'm dying, because my
right hip is really throbbing.

Like, last night, like, I had
to take three Advil at night.

I kind of, like, went cold.

"I was like, " I can't
go to Mexico with this.

I need to get a
cortisone shot."

Finally went in, and
it turned out I needed

a total hip reconstruction.

Because my femur
head was essentially

popping out of the socket.

It would be a series of five
surgeries over the course

of about a year.

And the surgeon didn't know if I

would be able to
return to the level

of climbing that I was at.

But since I already had done
all of the damage to my hips,

two weeks wasn't going to make
it necessarily much worse.

So I could go to Mexico,
complete the climb,

and then return for surgery.

I was in a state
of total disarray

and trying to process the
news that I had just gotten

about the potential
career-ending set of surgeries

that I'd have to go through.

So that's... yeah.

And then I got the
call about Nolan.

Nolan was a really
beloved member

of the community in climbing
and in base jumping.

He had gone ahead to hang
static lines for my team.

He was climbing the route,

and a major ledge
that he was on broke.

He fell from over 1,000 feet.

We had left Mexico
the next morning.

Nolan's whole family flew down.

After we recovered Nolan's body,

we shut the expedition
down, and we all flew home.

I felt extremely lost
and confused and broken.

I had hardly gotten
home from Mexico,

and I went in for my
first hip surgery.

Sasha's tagline was,
you're not the boss of me.

She said it all the time.

My husband would say something
that she didn't want to do.

She'd say, well, "I'm
going to get a new family."

Such a very tiny little girl.

Sasha?

Oh, she's waking up.

Sasha?

Hey, good morning.

Can you wiggle your toes?

Oh, there we go. Lift them up.

Push down with the
arms all the way.

No weight on that leg.

Sasha doesn't like to
not do something well.

And she doesn't like
to be imperfect.

So she'll just do it
and do it and do it.

Surgery number two, here we go.

Here I had this little
kid going off on weekends

climbing up these mountains.

She gave up her senior prom
to go on a climbing trip.

Like, there was no choice.

Like, "I'm not going to prom."

- Yay.
- Yay.

Watch this, Mom.

Press into this.

I allowed her to
do what she wanted.

I allowed her to go to Europe

with her boyfriend
when she was just 16.

She came back with
another boyfriend too.

It was, like, a Norwegian.

I trusted myself,
and I trusted her.

And I really didn't care
about what anybody else said.

Here we go again.

Love you.

When she told me
she was planning

on doing Logical Progression,

I wasn't so sure I
really wanted her to,

but Sasha just sets her goals.

And who am I to
say you can't do it

when that's what
she wants to do?

Good.

I could lay on a
whole lot of guilt,

but I'm going to save that
for when I really need it.

I was really in
an emotional state

after the surgeries and
not really knowing, like,

what life would look like.

I started thinking about
what I could control,

so I started thinking more
about what impact my nutrition

could have on my
body accelerating

through the recovery process.

The deep, dark
undercurrent of climbing

that's the elephant in the room

to a lot of climbers
and myself included,

is the conversation
about weight.

For group A with
Sasha DiGiulian,

2010, I was, like, at
the top of my podiums,

and I was 94 pounds.

Being skinny on the wall
meant less weight to pull up

the wall, but it also meant a
future of just health issues

that were unavoidable
if I kept on that track,

what I'm going to eat, how
much food I'm going to eat,

thinking that I needed
to keep losing weight.

The people who are
winning the world cups

were way thinner than I was.

I think there was
maybe, like, a period

where I hadn't seen her
in, like, a year or two,

and I bumped into her.

And I almost didn't
recognize her.

And, you know, my heart
just kind of dropped,

because she just looked

so skinny and not healthy.

As I progressed in my 20s, I
wanted to build my strength

instead of lose weight.

My experience with malnutrition

led me to really want to learn

a lot more about nutrition.

And it's only really been
over the last few years

that I've felt, like,

really confident in my own skin.

I love waking up,
moving my body,

taking part in everyday life.

And when you're injured,
you don't get to do that.

And so it makes you
feel super vulnerable.

I can't really explain very well

why I'm so inspired to
climb Logical Progression.

It's just a climb
that represents a lot.

It represents this
entire journey

of what I've gone through.

And it represented this
driving force for me

before my injury.

And it represented something
that I wanted to do,

that I was committed to,
that I was training for.

And it's almost like the climb
itself is what separates me

before all of this and me now.

Just by being on
Logical Progression,

I get to confront
my fears head on.

It's totally insane
for her to be

pursuing a goal like this

on the heels of five surgeries.

It's beyond dark comedy.

It's kind of like,
"What are we doing here?

"Like, your hips aren't ready.

"You don't have a partner.

Like, give it a
couple months."

Okay.

To have one surgery
where they break her hip

and reconstruct it,
putting in four big screws,

recovered from that,

second hip, same thing,

those are pretty
major operations.

She's an elite athlete,
and I think she probably,

like me, recovers
faster than most people.

Hopefully, I'll be ready
to go to Mexico in April.

You'll see how it goes.

I think it's not bad
to go and look at it

and suss it out and
check it out and,

you know, do a survey and, like,

maybe climb some pitches.

But I don't expect
you to complete it.

You know, I went to Boulder,
and I spent time with her,

like, watching her
recovery, and, like,

she was a long ways away

from getting to the point where

she could do
Logical Progression.

For the last year,
she's been sitting still

and waiting and trying to heal.

Like, I know she needs this.

She needs a challenge that's
not just a small challenge.

She needs something that, like,

is just on the ragged
edge of insanity.

It's binary for her.

Like, this is it.

Like, she's either going
to do this and pull it off

and she's back, or she's
not going to do it,

and these hip surgeries
were the end of her

professional climbing.

Like, it almost feels like
she's that fixated on it.

Getting on challenging climbs

is good for me,
because then I just get

that fitness and power back.

It's, like, a humbling
experience, I think.

I mean, I'm just so
happy to be back on rock,

but I don't feel my most in
shape or anything like that.

And remembering that I did
go through five surgeries

and a lot of time off climbing,

like, it's important
for me to remember that.

Returning to Logical
Progression for me

is how I could get
back and through

this really trying
time in my own life.

Me, I would have delayed
Mexico a couple of months.

I've never made her decisions.

She knows when she's ready.

If she says she's
ready, she's ready.

Sasha called me to ask me to
be a part of this expedition

to Logical Progression.

The problem was, I
wasn't really thinking

about climbing at that level.

It could have been
a great adventure

but just wasn't the time for me.

Nice.

I knew Sasha was disappointed,

but I had to follow
my instincts.

I feel like we've got
everything in place.

And yeah, if you have a
last-minute change of heart...

Okay, I'm going.

Yeah, you're like,
"Guys, wait."

Dude, less than two weeks out.

We can find another spot, right?

So, Vian, you want to go first?

No, you can go
first if you want.

You're tying in. You go.

I know, but you want to go?

Vian's a badass climber.

And I've known her
for over ten years.

And we met when she stole
my Swedish Fish at the crag.

You just have to
tell everybody that,

like I'm a Swedish Fish
thief or something.

It was one time.

I never did it again.

11, including...

Vian said she could
maybe make Mexico work.

You're actually, like, the
first person that when I said,

like, anything about
Mexico that's actually

expressed enthusiasm
around going.

But I'm down.

We'll be safe. Okay,
I got to get going.

- Okay.
- You clipping this?

You want a stick clip?

But I have one too.

We're talking about,
like, weeks away

from this expedition.

And I come back from
work, and she's like,

"Vian wants to go."

And I'm like, "Who is Vian?"

I've never even heard of Vian.

I mean, as I
understand it, like,

Vian hasn't done
a big wall before.

The first time I met
anybody, like, "famous,"

it was actually Sasha.

And I just, like, went
up and introduced myself.

I was like, "Hi, I'm Vian."

And, like, we hit
it off really well,

and we were both climbing
in the Pipe Dream a lot,

and we were just, like,
good friends after that.

But yeah, I don't know
what really inspires me.

I can't say for sure,
like, why I climb, like,

there's some grand
thing behind it.

I'm just kind of compelled.

I never had the ambition to
be a professional climber,

and I would never
want to be famous.

I would not be able
to put on a happy face

if I had to go to a crag and
there were ten people there

who knew who I was and
expected me to climb

really hard and take
photos with them.

I think Sasha's handled fame
with a lot of grace and class.

She's a really public
figure, and so a lot of shade

gets thrown her way.

I told Sasha, heavy is the
head that wears the crown.

I was stubborn, independent.

I guess it's just
the way that I am.

I think I got a lot of
my ability to not see no

as an option from my dad.

"Was always, " See the light
at the end of the tunnel,

and that's the option that
you're going to arrive at."

There's going to be
roadblocks along the way,

but it's always going to be
leading towards this goal.

And then it's, by any
means possible, achieve it.

When I was 22, my dad
took me to the airport

to fly to Wyoming,
our little tradition.

I was climbing in Wyoming,

and my mom called me to tell me

that my dad had had a stroke.

I flew back immediately,
was there in the hospital.

And we were asking all these
questions about what his state

would be when he woke up,
and the surgeon was like,

"You're not asking
the right questions."

He never woke up.

I mean, I felt the most gutted
that I have felt in my life.

My response was just to
suppress all my feelings

and just keep going, because
that's what I knew how to do.

The first time I met Sasha,
she had just lost her father,

and she gave a presentation
that was so, like, together.

Like, she didn't
cry or anything.

And it just made me think,
"Wow, she's really good

"at compartmentalizing
her emotions

and setting that
off to the side,"

which you do have to do on
a scary route sometimes.

You have to just say,
"Okay, I'm really scared,

but I can't focus on that."

- What's up, dude?
- What's up?

Dude, we're going
to Mexico today.

Yeah.

Okay, I'm going to...

I'll be in...

I'll go get the bars too.
- Okay.

Feel free to come
inside whenever.

Come on, Moose.

Wednesday, we
arrive to Chihuahua.

Thursday, we drive from
Chihuahua to Basaseachi.

Friday, we drive to the top of
the wall and rapp down to here.

Down to the bottom.

I was really excited
to do a big wall.

I had never been on
a big wall before.

I thought 300 bolts,
portaledge, no problem.

I'd known Vian for
about a decade.

She climbs super hard, and
she's been an incredibly

supportive and loyal friend.

And so I was excited by the idea

of getting to know her better

and going on this big
adventure with her.

Oh, she's got
something equivalent.

Sasha's never been
in this much pain.

She's never been in a situation

where she's this out of
shape before a climb.

And seeing this audacious goal
that she's thrown on herself,

it's just scary.

And I think everyone that
loves her is terrified.

She needs to go prove to
herself that she's still

a professional climber,
that this injury hasn't

ripped away her identity.

I don't know where you click
into that drive and that fire,

but she has it, and
she clicks into it.

It's why she is who she is.

Why I do what I do?

That's a big question.

I think that proving a
goal, that's what drives me.

I'm nervous for the
rappel more than the climb

right now, because that's
what's the first thing to do,

and it's a lot of weight.

It's, like, maybe more weight
than I'm used to rapping with.

You got this.

Thanks, Vian.

Mm-hmm.

Achieving something
eats away at me.

Like, that's the way
that I approach my life.

Yeah.

The death of my hips.

Ohh.

Ow, my fingers.

I hate this bag.

We've officially started
the descent down.

We all have pretty
heavy haul bags.

And yeah, it's pretty
phenomenal being here.

The hips are so sore.

That's pretty.

- Yeah.
- Do you copy?

After a night of no sleep,
we're racking up to rapp down

these first eight pitches.

Made it to the bottom.

We're at the bottom.

Do you want to go
first, or should I?

Whatever. Want to
Roshambo for it?

Yeah.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

I go first.

Top of the second,
pulling Vian up.

There she is.

This is what's ahead of us.

We'll see how it goes.

We are here sitting
forever in the sun.

There's the sun.

Ow.

That hurt your eyes, didn't
it? You weren't expecting that.

You two would have been
like fried chicken.

It was definitely really hot.

The sun is just baking,
and the rock temperature

just goes way up.

And it's just a lot harder
when the rock temperature

is a lot higher.

And it's so hot right now.

Come on, work that
right foot in.

Come on, Digi, come on.

Ahh!

Oh, shit.

Fuck.
- All right.

Right foot high.

I see the next draw.

Okay. All right.

Okay.

Whoo!

I'm at the anchor.

Nice job.

Oh, my God.

I'm, like, shaking.

That's probably as hard
as I've ever seen her try.

And it just showed
to me how, like,

how fragile she was or how
much she just wanted this,

how badly she wanted
this, you know,

and for some people,
it's just, like,

it's just a climb, you know.

It's okay to say...
to stop, you know?

You know, you just... you just
had surgery not that long ago.

It's, like, maybe it was too...

too early.

You know, but for Sasha,
she just really needed this.

What made you keep going?

I think I just...

I literally just could
think right foot,

right hand, left
foot, left hand.

Like, I couldn't think
of anything else.

And then I was like, you
made it through the crux.

Like, just keep it together.

It'll be one less
pitch for tomorrow.

Day three, we don't know
whose spoon this is.

That's all.

I wasn't trying to, like...

Day three, I don't know
whose spoon this is.

I wasn't trying to make
you feel bad or anything.

That'd be my spoon,
but we can share.

Sharing is caring.

Man, I'm, like, triple-fisting.

I got my dirty
Chai with collagen,

my trail mix, and my Red Bull.

Mm-hmm.

And Kevin's over
there taking a shit.

Kevin?

We're just one
big, happy family.

After my surgeries, I
lost touch with who I was.

And I lost touch with what it
even feels like to succeed.

During the whole time
of being injured,

I didn't have any
feeling of success.

You got it.

Left hand up.

I put my right foot high.

Yeah.

Two finger, get
your right foot up.

We got into a situation
where we had to climb

a little bit at night.

And we went into the area
where Nolan had his accident.

And I know Sasha
didn't want to climb

that pitch in the dark.

It was pretty scary.

I just passed Nolan's rock
scar where the rock broke.

It's pretty visible,
but I couldn't see

what happened with the bolt.

My guess would be
that really big rock

picked off and cut his rope.

It was really scary, because
as I was passing that,

my headlamp flashed
that it was dying.

Nolan didn't make any mistakes,

yet he died climbing.

It affected me in
a really heavy way,

because everything
was done right.

So many nights of not
sleeping is killing me.

I think I was in the
harness for 20 hours.

We've got three more
really long 5.12 pitches

that we need to do
tomorrow to then kind of

be back in the running to feel
like the rest of this route

is possible on free.

I went left foot pocket.

Yeah.

Augh! God!

That's a really hard transition.

It's hard.

Nice.

Good job.

Fuck, yeah.

Hell, yeah.

Good job.

- Pitch 13.
- Done.

Strenuous 45 minutes.

Holy guacamole.

Ohh.

Another pitch bites the dust.

So we've officially
crossed this side.

Now we're coming up to
finger to fist, route 17.

Going to...

Oh, yeah, we're going
to do the Spread Eagle.

Augh!

Ahh!

Augh.

That was a serious crag.

Augh!

Yeah, girl.

Augh!

Yes, sun.

Whoo.

Yeah. Okay.

That's it.
- Whoo!

Whoo!

Pow!

You're a good lead.

Thanks.

Move.

Am I in your face with my butt?

Oh!

Jesus.

That thing did look good.

Sure wasn't, though.

Just a little choss left.

I'm trying, Mom.

Got your spot.

I actually just did.

I think it saved you.

Stay with it.

You got it.

Nice, Sasha.

Come on.

Ahh! Fuck.

Nothing broke.

Nothing.

So much stuff broke.

It's so hard there.

Try that again.

Okay.

Ahh!

Such a big move.

Yeah.

Holy shit.

Yeah.

Man, I thought I could
get that last pitch.

Such a bummer.

If it sticks once,
it won't be as good.

So start in the back and
then end in the back.

I'm just like your
personal assistant here.

No, I said, you're
my best friend.

- Okay.
- Short of Moose.

You tell that to all
your climbing partners.

I don't have climbing partners.

When I met her in
2011 when she was 16,

she was very much
a protected kid.

But now Sasha is so strong,
and she's capable of anything.

And I'll just climb over here.

After my dad died,

I recognized that you're
mourning this space

that they left behind.

And that space that
they leave behind is...

it's really painful
to think about, like,

it never being filled again.

That space is what I
keep trying to fill.

We did it.

It's kind of crazy.

I didn't even know if
I'd be climbing again

when I went in for
all those surgeries.

I really didn't.

I didn't know what to expect.

Climbing's opened a
lot of doors for me

to go down this journey...

But also to realize that
a lot of satisfaction

and joy that I get out of life

doesn't need to always come

from the physical
sense of sending.

And my path forward
doesn't necessarily center

around climbing.

♪ A million little knives ♪

♪ Carve out your name ♪

♪ In the small of my back ♪

I needed to learn
purpose beyond a wall.

And I think that that does
come with a sense of security.

And I would argue that
it comes with a sense

of career and sense of home.

I didn't want to tell
the City of Boulder

that we're done,
because I just want

to be complete with
the whole project.

- Yeah.
- And at that point,

we can address this issue of
possibly changing the name,

because they have it
registered as Vamos Chicas.

And Queen Line might
be a better name

just because it's on the maiden.

And it is the best
line, I think,

on that whole formation.

And you always hear King Line.

- Yeah.
- Why not Queen Line?

Or, like, the queen.

The queen, the queens.

The queens.

Yeah, I like it, Queen Line.

I think it's a perfect name.

This is the day.
We're going to do it.

Let's go. The
queen on the line.

Ladies and gentlemen,
the first pitch.

Here we go.

Lynn's shown to me
how to age gracefully

within the sport and
still be involved

and still be a steward
of the community

and be out there
pushing new lines

and supporting climbers.

Sasha has a chance to
really look at periods

of life and what her
actual goals are..

What she wants to do, not
what's expected of her,

but what she wants to
do, what makes her happy.

She's young and still ambitious

and wanting to do more and more.

At 30, she's still
got a lot of time

to do a lot of really
amazing things.

We each have that
thing that drives us.

And that thing that drives us,

that passion is what I
feel really strongly about

harnessing and
embracing and nurturing.

And that's more important
than any summit,

than any achievement.

♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪

♪ And I will never be ♪

♪ And I will never see ♪

♪ And every choice I make ♪

♪ Consequences negative ♪

♪ Battle zone is known to me ♪

♪ And you to me ♪

♪ Most important feel, feel ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no, ♪

♪ No no, no, no,
no no, no, no, no ♪