Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:04,536
Hi, ALF.
2
00:00:04,538 --> 00:00:06,271
Hi.
3
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:09,975
What does
E-N-N-U-I spell?
4
00:00:09,977 --> 00:00:11,377
Beats me.
5
00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:13,212
What do we send
you to school for?
6
00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:15,314
Beats me.
7
00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:16,782
Can I see the mail?
8
00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:19,318
I'm expecting to hear
from the matchbook people
9
00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:22,187
on how well
I drew Binky.
10
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:23,722
Here you go, ALF.
11
00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,894
"Occupant."
"Resident."
12
00:00:31,332 --> 00:00:33,332
Lingerie catalog.
13
00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:36,268
Kate, you saucy vixen, you!
14
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:40,172
Uh-oh.
15
00:00:40,174 --> 00:00:41,673
They didn't like
your Binky?
16
00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:45,177
Worse! It's from that
college Lynn wants to go to.
17
00:00:45,179 --> 00:00:46,478
Why is that bad?
18
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,847
The college
is in Massachusetts.
19
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:51,583
If Lynn goes to college
in Massachusetts
20
00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:53,719
she won't be
living here anymore.
21
00:00:54,922 --> 00:00:57,156
- Hi!
- Hi.
22
00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:58,590
No mail today.
23
00:00:58,592 --> 00:01:00,426
Then what are you holding?
24
00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:02,928
Mail.
25
00:01:02,930 --> 00:01:04,563
I'm a terrible liar.
26
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,698
- Let me see.
- Wait, wait, wait.
27
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:10,769
- What does E-N-N-U-I, spell?
- Ennui?
28
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:13,705
Ding ding ding!
That's absolutely correct.
29
00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:16,408
No need for you
to go to college.
30
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:19,178
Give that to me.
31
00:01:19,180 --> 00:01:22,081
Oh, my gosh, it's here!
Cross your fingers, everybody!
32
00:01:22,083 --> 00:01:23,582
No problem.
33
00:01:25,553 --> 00:01:27,419
Alright!
This is fantastic!
34
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,221
I can't believe it!
I've got to call Laurie.
35
00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:30,789
Yes! Yes!
36
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:33,926
Maybe she didn't get in.
37
00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:37,763
[theme music]
38
00:02:06,060 --> 00:02:07,826
[music continues]
39
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:39,658
[instrumental music]
40
00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:45,030
[sighs]
41
00:02:46,534 --> 00:02:49,735
- What was that for?
- Well, nothing.
42
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,374
[sighs]
43
00:02:57,478 --> 00:02:59,511
Is there something wrong?
44
00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:01,980
What could possibly be wrong?
45
00:03:01,982 --> 00:03:03,482
You're moving out.
46
00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:05,817
You won't be living here.
47
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:09,621
You'll never call,
you'll never write.
48
00:03:09,623 --> 00:03:11,190
ALF, just because
I'm going away to Amherst
49
00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:13,792
doesn't mean you're never
gonna see me again.
50
00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,862
What's the matter,
aren't you happy here?
51
00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:19,998
It's Kate, isn't it?
52
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,668
No, and it's not that
I'm not happy here.
53
00:03:22,670 --> 00:03:25,571
It's just that it's time
for me to be out on my own
54
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:29,508
to make my own decisions,
my own mistakes.
55
00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:31,677
You can make mistakes here.
56
00:03:31,679 --> 00:03:33,912
Take it from one who knows.
57
00:03:35,516 --> 00:03:37,149
I get the point.
58
00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:38,917
You don't want me
to go away to school.
59
00:03:39,687 --> 00:03:43,555
Well, uh, yeah. Sorta.
60
00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:47,859
Oh, ALF!
That's so sweet.
61
00:03:47,861 --> 00:03:49,194
No mush.
62
00:03:49,196 --> 00:03:50,762
Sorry.
63
00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:54,566
Do you know
I'm gonna miss you too?
64
00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:57,903
- You will?
- Uh-huh.
65
00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,938
I'll write to you
every week
66
00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:02,941
and I'll even
send you a sweatshirt.
67
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:06,812
Just send me a regular shirt,
I'll sweat in it myself.
68
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:09,114
Better idea.
69
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,182
[knock on door]
70
00:04:10,184 --> 00:04:11,483
Come in.
71
00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:15,454
Just in time.
72
00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:17,723
We were discussing sweat.
73
00:04:17,725 --> 00:04:20,859
Which side would
you like to expound?
74
00:04:20,861 --> 00:04:23,895
Could we postpone
the sweat debate?
75
00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:27,633
There's something that Kate
and I wanna discuss with Lynn.
76
00:04:27,635 --> 00:04:31,270
Fine! I'll hie me
to yon refrigerator
77
00:04:31,272 --> 00:04:33,672
and forage
for meat loaf.
78
00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:37,142
Later, dude, dudettes.
79
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,247
Is something wrong?
You guys look upset.
80
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:44,650
Uh, I'm afraid,
we have some bad news, honey.
81
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:50,956
I've checked this over
a dozen different ways but..
82
00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:56,728
I-I guess there's no
easy way to say this.
83
00:04:58,165 --> 00:05:01,566
We just can't afford to send you
away to school next year.
84
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:06,972
When I applied, you said this
wasn't gonna be a problem.
85
00:05:06,974 --> 00:05:10,642
Well, we've had some
complications since then.
86
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:14,479
- You mean ALF.
- Yeah, I mean ALF.
87
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:17,282
We counted on my having
a full-time job this past year
88
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:19,785
but with ALF here,
that just wasn't possible.
89
00:05:19,787 --> 00:05:22,454
And we've had so many
extra expenses
90
00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:26,358
supporting him, you know,
there's food, and breakage
91
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,593
and food..
92
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:33,999
You can still get a very good
education at a state university.
93
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:37,102
But you will have
to live at home.
94
00:05:37,104 --> 00:05:39,538
I guess I should have
seen this coming.
95
00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:46,211
If it's any consolation..
96
00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,781
...we've had a rare opportunity
97
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,883
living with an alien.
98
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,386
You know, you couldn't get
that at Amherst.
99
00:05:54,388 --> 00:05:56,188
I'll never find out,
will I?
100
00:05:57,991 --> 00:06:01,326
I'm sorry, Lynn,
if you're unhappy.
101
00:06:01,328 --> 00:06:04,963
But you know in life, we can't
always get everything we want.
102
00:06:04,965 --> 00:06:07,499
Oh yeah, dad?
Where did you go to college?
103
00:06:07,501 --> 00:06:08,900
Uh, Amherst.
104
00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:11,570
Oh.
105
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:15,841
My parents didn't
have an alien.
106
00:06:15,843 --> 00:06:19,745
Give me an L! Give me a Y,
give me an N, N, N!
107
00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:22,180
Now lose the extra N.
108
00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:23,882
What have you got?
109
00:06:28,655 --> 00:06:30,655
Was it something
I spelled?
110
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:33,825
[instrumental music]
111
00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:37,696
Lynnie, have a cookie.
112
00:06:37,698 --> 00:06:41,166
- No, thank you.
- Oh, boy! More for me.
113
00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:42,701
And me!
114
00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:44,403
You know how to eat these?
115
00:06:44,405 --> 00:06:46,004
Twist off the top
116
00:06:46,006 --> 00:06:48,774
and lick off all
the gooey stuff inside.
117
00:06:48,776 --> 00:06:52,277
Really? That's how
I eat a jar of mayonnaise.
118
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:54,846
You're right, dad.
119
00:06:54,848 --> 00:06:57,215
I couldn't get this kind
of education at Amherst.
120
00:06:57,217 --> 00:06:58,350
[burps]
121
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:02,854
Lynn, I know
you're disappointed
122
00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:04,956
but there are a lot
of very fine schools nearby.
123
00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:06,958
You can get a very,
very good education.
124
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:09,127
But it's not
the same thing.
125
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:13,198
I wanted to live in a dorm
so I could finally be on my own.
126
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,966
Lynn, we've explained this
to you already.
127
00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:18,437
We can't afford to
send you away to school.
128
00:07:18,439 --> 00:07:20,272
Fine, I'm going to my room
129
00:07:20,274 --> 00:07:23,308
the place I'll be sleeping
for the next four years.
130
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:27,746
Oh, this is terrible.
131
00:07:27,748 --> 00:07:30,549
Why? You're gonna have
your daughter around
132
00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:33,418
for the next four years.
133
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:37,222
We would've been happier if
she could have gone to Amherst.
134
00:07:37,224 --> 00:07:39,491
Then you wanted
to get rid of her.
135
00:07:39,493 --> 00:07:42,761
Was it because she drinks
milk right out of the carton?
136
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,663
Of course not.
137
00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:46,665
Phew! Thank goodness!
138
00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:51,136
We didn't want
to get rid of her.
139
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:54,005
It's just that it's hard
when your child wants something
140
00:07:54,007 --> 00:07:56,741
and you can't
give it to her.
141
00:07:56,743 --> 00:07:58,977
I've got a solution
to your problem.
142
00:07:58,979 --> 00:08:01,813
Oh, please,
clue us in.
143
00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:05,116
Brian, bring me
the family budget.
144
00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:08,453
Or as I like to call it,
gone with the wind.
145
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:09,988
[laughing]
146
00:08:11,925 --> 00:08:15,293
Alright, what are you doing
with our family budget?
147
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:19,264
I'm trying to bring some fiscal
sanity into this household.
148
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,770
Thank you,
my trusty sidekick.
149
00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:28,473
You're welcome, Lord Vader.
150
00:08:28,475 --> 00:08:30,275
Uh, Willie, look at this.
151
00:08:30,277 --> 00:08:34,346
A payment to your mechanic
for new brake shoes.
152
00:08:34,348 --> 00:08:37,115
Isn't that a trifle foppish?
153
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:39,184
Of course.
You're right.
154
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:43,021
I'd get home a lot faster if
I were unable to stop the car.
155
00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:46,825
And these grocery bills!
156
00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:49,561
Well, we can't touch those.
157
00:08:49,563 --> 00:08:52,397
Although, I might point out
that filet of cat
158
00:08:52,399 --> 00:08:55,400
is cheaper than roast of beef.
159
00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:57,836
Oh, here we are. This is what
I was looking for.
160
00:08:57,838 --> 00:09:01,373
Miscellaneous. $10,000.
161
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:07,646
Just stop buying
so many miscellaneouses.
162
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:09,948
What are they,
Greek pastries?
163
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:14,219
ALF, we weren't gonna
tell you this but
164
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:19,891
those miscellaneous expenses are
what it costs to support you.
165
00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:23,662
- No.
- I would've guessed higher.
166
00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:28,567
On Melmac you could support
a family of four with that.
167
00:09:28,569 --> 00:09:33,972
On Earth, we used to support
a family of four with that.
168
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:40,178
So what you're saying is..
169
00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:43,281
...I'm the real reason Lynn
can't go away to school.
170
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,088
I feel like slime.
171
00:09:50,891 --> 00:09:53,224
I feel like slime guts.
172
00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:57,529
I feel like
slime gut droppings.
173
00:09:57,531 --> 00:10:01,800
I feel like slime gut
droppings on an open fire.
174
00:10:04,404 --> 00:10:06,705
How do you feel?
175
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,106
Nauseous.
176
00:10:09,076 --> 00:10:11,509
[instrumental music]
177
00:10:15,816 --> 00:10:17,315
(ALF)
'Kate, Willie?'
178
00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:21,219
Where's the fire extinguisher?
179
00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:29,961
2.1 seconds.
A new record!
180
00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:33,598
- There's no fire.
- I know.
181
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:36,134
I just wanted
your immediate attention.
182
00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:40,472
You got it.
What do you want?
183
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:44,976
Well, since it's my fault that
Lynn can't go away to college
184
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,845
I'm gonna do
something about it.
185
00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:48,613
Okay.
186
00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:52,183
Willie, I'm getting you
a night job.
187
00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:53,184
What?
188
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:54,786
I noticed
you spend your evenings
189
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:57,455
just hanging around the house.
190
00:10:57,457 --> 00:11:01,426
Yes, I like to call
that living my life.
191
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:04,696
Call it what you will.
It's a thing of the past.
192
00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:07,165
Now, I've got something
here for you.
193
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:10,368
It's called,
"men's room attendant."
194
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:15,507
Do I look like
a men's room attendant?
195
00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:18,977
No, you look like
a scrubbing bubble.
196
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:22,380
- You have an interview at 9:00.
- I'm not going.
197
00:11:22,382 --> 00:11:24,015
We'll have to build up
his confidence.
198
00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:26,518
I'm not going.
199
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,119
Well, now, Kate, I notice
200
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:30,889
you yourself are
not gainfully employed.
201
00:11:30,891 --> 00:11:34,392
'To wit, I have several
suggestions.'
202
00:11:34,394 --> 00:11:36,327
Suggestion one.
203
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:42,400
"Telemarketing.
For interview call 555-Jugs."
204
00:11:44,337 --> 00:11:45,870
Pass.
205
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,739
Suggestion two.
206
00:11:47,741 --> 00:11:50,208
"Be a model
in your spare time.
207
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:54,913
For interview call 555-Jugs."
208
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,817
Where did you get
this newspaper?
209
00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:01,219
- I called 555-Jugs.
- Juggs.
210
00:12:02,022 --> 00:12:03,521
Suggestion three.
211
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,890
ALF, Kate and I
have all the careers
212
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:08,393
we can handle
at the moment, thank you.
213
00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:13,164
Alright. How about putting Brian
in a serial commercial?
214
00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:16,267
That Mikey kid
must be pushing 40 by now.
215
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:22,073
ALF, I appreciate
what you're trying to do
216
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,409
but you've got
to leave this to us.
217
00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:28,947
We-we just have
to make some sacrifices.
218
00:12:28,949 --> 00:12:31,082
Sacrifices?
219
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,085
Well, you're not gonna throw me
in a volcano, are you?
220
00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:41,426
Oh, no, no!
No, of course not. No.
221
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:43,661
Well, I guess I've got
no other choice.
222
00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:47,232
I'll have to get a job.
223
00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:48,466
You?
224
00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:52,203
Hey, hey, here's something!
225
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:55,306
Exotic dancer.
I could do that!
226
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:00,111
ALF, you can't get a job.
227
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,946
Do you remember the time
you tried to earn money
228
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:04,149
doing phone surveys?
229
00:13:04,151 --> 00:13:07,285
- Yeah.
- 'How much money did you make?'
230
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,419
None.
231
00:13:08,421 --> 00:13:10,388
How many policemen
came to the house?
232
00:13:11,625 --> 00:13:13,892
Eleven.
233
00:13:13,894 --> 00:13:15,326
Enough said.
234
00:13:15,328 --> 00:13:17,629
- Goodnight, ALF.
- Night, ALF.
235
00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:19,130
Goodnight.
236
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:27,806
Oh, hey.
Here's the job for me.
237
00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:30,341
And what a majestic title!
238
00:13:30,343 --> 00:13:33,411
It sounds like a superhero.
239
00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:35,180
Paper-Boy!
240
00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:38,750
[instrumental music]
241
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:48,026
[clears throat]
242
00:13:50,964 --> 00:13:54,165
[clears throat]
243
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:03,708
Now that you're up,
could I see the two of you
244
00:14:03,710 --> 00:14:04,809
in the living room?
245
00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:06,211
[groans]
246
00:14:06,213 --> 00:14:10,114
ALF, we're tired now.
We wanna go to sleep.
247
00:14:10,116 --> 00:14:13,384
Fine, but I don't know
how you two can sleep
248
00:14:13,386 --> 00:14:17,388
considering what's
in the living room.
249
00:14:29,736 --> 00:14:31,135
[gasps]
250
00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:33,037
- What!
- What are these?
251
00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:36,174
Newspapers, Willie.
Get with it!
252
00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:38,343
Why are they here?
253
00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:40,845
Perhaps I should explain.
254
00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:43,414
- Please do!
- No, no, let me guess.
255
00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:46,351
You're a newspaper boy.
256
00:14:46,353 --> 00:14:49,220
Well, we prefer the term
paper person.
257
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:51,089
It's gender-neutral.
258
00:14:52,259 --> 00:14:54,359
Do you actually believe
259
00:14:54,361 --> 00:14:56,828
that you can afford to send
someone through college
260
00:14:56,830 --> 00:14:58,663
with a paper route?
261
00:14:58,665 --> 00:15:02,934
No. That's why I
got 10 paper routes.
262
00:15:02,936 --> 00:15:08,206
Oh, 10 paper routes?
There must be 500 papers here.
263
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:11,376
Well, actually, 501.
264
00:15:11,378 --> 00:15:14,078
They gave me
an extra copy by mistake.
265
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,747
[chuckles]
266
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:19,217
ALF, you can't
deliver newspapers.
267
00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:20,685
Well, sure, I can!
268
00:15:20,687 --> 00:15:22,654
You haven't
seen my throwing arm.
269
00:15:24,624 --> 00:15:28,259
Willie, I can't throw you
and the newspaper.
270
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:33,197
Well, you two
better get dressed.
271
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,234
Why?
272
00:15:36,236 --> 00:15:38,069
If these papers
aren't delivered
273
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:40,605
500 people
won't get their news.
274
00:15:40,607 --> 00:15:43,741
Their weather,
their Doonesbury.
275
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:47,578
Well, nobody
ever gets Doonesbury.
276
00:15:47,580 --> 00:15:50,181
It's become self indulgent,
don't you think?
277
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:53,418
Willie..
278
00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,420
Willie, no, Willie,
I hate to say..
279
00:15:55,422 --> 00:15:58,389
Willie, we're gonna have
to deliver these papers
280
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,992
500 people want
their newspaper.
281
00:16:00,994 --> 00:16:03,294
And I wanna win
a new bicycle.
282
00:16:05,932 --> 00:16:08,166
Alright.
283
00:16:08,168 --> 00:16:11,102
Alright. Help me
load them into the car.
284
00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:13,571
Uh, listen,
on your way home
285
00:16:13,573 --> 00:16:16,607
could you pick me up
a an Egg McMuffin?
286
00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:19,444
(Kate)
'Freeze, paperboy!'
287
00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:22,747
- Me?
- You're coming with us.
288
00:16:22,749 --> 00:16:26,017
- What, are you crazy?
- I can't deliver papers.
289
00:16:26,019 --> 00:16:29,854
- Someone might see me.
- That's their tough luck.
290
00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:33,324
[instrumental music]
291
00:16:34,928 --> 00:16:37,295
[crickets chirping]
292
00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:40,965
(ALF)
'I think this is the one.
No, no, no, no! Uh, uh..'
293
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:44,302
'Yeah, yeah, this is the one.
No, no, no. Wait, wait.'
294
00:16:44,304 --> 00:16:46,838
Uh, might be this one.
295
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,172
No, no, no, no!
296
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,108
Oh, yeah, yeah! It is,
it is. Right here.
297
00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:51,809
Throw, Willie! Now, now!
298
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:53,211
[rattling]
299
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:54,712
Oops!
300
00:16:57,050 --> 00:16:58,516
Oops?
301
00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:02,787
Would you be so kind
as to define..
302
00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:05,289
...oops?
303
00:17:06,659 --> 00:17:07,759
Wrong house.
304
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:10,661
Again.
305
00:17:10,663 --> 00:17:13,965
Hey, what do I look like,
The Amazing Kreskin?
306
00:17:13,967 --> 00:17:15,933
It's dark out there.
307
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,744
Want me to drive
for a while?
308
00:17:29,015 --> 00:17:31,716
[instrumental music]
309
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:37,021
Okay, Willie,
make a left here.
310
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:40,258
Oh, no, no!
Right, right.
311
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:43,694
Oh, no, no. Go straight.
Go straight.
312
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:46,697
Okay, now, now right.
Make a right now.
313
00:17:46,699 --> 00:17:48,599
Right. Why aren't you turning?
314
00:17:48,601 --> 00:17:50,601
Well, there's
no intersection!
315
00:17:51,171 --> 00:17:52,804
Good answer.
316
00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:58,509
(Kate)
We haven't delivered
a paper in 15 minutes.
317
00:17:58,511 --> 00:18:01,412
ALF, are you sure you know
where we're going?
318
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:04,615
ALF?
319
00:18:06,619 --> 00:18:09,620
[snoring]
320
00:18:13,726 --> 00:18:16,027
[sighs]
321
00:18:16,029 --> 00:18:17,495
Last one.
322
00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:21,232
Well, it's about time!
323
00:18:21,234 --> 00:18:23,601
- Kate?
- Raquel.
324
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:27,238
You're up early.
325
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:30,575
Are you our
new paperboy?
326
00:18:30,577 --> 00:18:33,478
We prefer paper person,
it's gender-neutral.
327
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:39,383
Kate, hey, Kate, you should have
told us you were destitute.
328
00:18:39,385 --> 00:18:40,918
Oh, no, Raquel.
329
00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:42,420
We're just earning
a little extra money
330
00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:44,122
to send Lynn away to school.
331
00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:45,623
Uh-huh. Sure.
332
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:48,759
Well, if you and the family
ever have to sleep in your car
333
00:18:48,761 --> 00:18:51,362
please feel free
to park on our front lawn.
334
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:54,665
Right next to
Trevor's cousin.
335
00:18:56,169 --> 00:18:58,402
Someone lives in
that Volkswagen?
336
00:18:58,404 --> 00:19:00,671
No, not the Volkswagen,
the jeep.
337
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:03,574
Well, brr.
338
00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:11,516
[instrumental music]
339
00:19:16,623 --> 00:19:18,623
Raquel saw me
delivering her paper.
340
00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:20,791
She thinks
we're destitute.
341
00:19:20,793 --> 00:19:22,293
Destitute?
342
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:25,863
I got a job,
I got a paper route
343
00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:29,133
I got an interview
at 9:00 a.m.
344
00:19:29,135 --> 00:19:33,538
Look alive! The evening
edition will soon be here.
345
00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:36,040
No more editions,
no more paper routes
346
00:19:36,042 --> 00:19:40,444
no more ink on my fingers.
This madness must stop.
347
00:19:40,446 --> 00:19:41,979
Hey, come on!
348
00:19:41,981 --> 00:19:43,614
What's four years of sleep
349
00:19:43,616 --> 00:19:46,017
compared to our
daughter's happiness?
350
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,153
She's not our daughter.
351
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:51,222
I mean she's our daughter.
352
00:19:51,224 --> 00:19:53,324
She's not our daughter.
353
00:19:53,326 --> 00:19:55,459
- Who's not your daughter?
- You.
354
00:19:55,461 --> 00:19:57,828
Since when?
355
00:19:57,830 --> 00:20:01,499
Lynn, of course
you're our daughter.
356
00:20:01,501 --> 00:20:04,168
Well, biologically
you're their daughter
357
00:20:04,170 --> 00:20:07,371
but I will be giving you away
at your wedding.
358
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:08,839
I may not be having a wedding.
359
00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:11,209
And if I do, it will probably
be in my bedroom.
360
00:20:11,211 --> 00:20:14,078
Okay. That's it, Lynn!
361
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,080
Yeah, you're grounded!
362
00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:18,416
[knock on door]
363
00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:20,618
Under the table, ALF.
364
00:20:23,523 --> 00:20:26,023
- 'Raquel?'
- 'Oh, hi, Kate.'
365
00:20:26,025 --> 00:20:29,927
(Kate)
'Uh, Raquel, we don't
need this food.'
366
00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:34,065
(Raquel)
'Well, you can't
live on pride. Bon appetit.'
367
00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:37,935
Who is she,
Julia Child?
368
00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:41,105
What was that all about?
369
00:20:42,108 --> 00:20:44,542
Raquel thinks
we're destitute.
370
00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:46,110
Why would she think that?
371
00:20:46,112 --> 00:20:49,380
She saw me deliver
her newspaper this morning.
372
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:51,349
What?
373
00:20:51,351 --> 00:20:54,952
Oh! ALF got a paper route.
374
00:20:57,890 --> 00:21:02,026
Oh, correction,
he got 10 paper routes.
375
00:21:03,396 --> 00:21:07,765
He wanted to try to raise enough
money to send you to college.
376
00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:11,702
Yeah, and Kate and Willie
were my assistants.
377
00:21:11,704 --> 00:21:15,740
Not my cheerful
assistants mind you.
378
00:21:15,742 --> 00:21:18,743
You guys stayed up all night
delivering newspapers?
379
00:21:18,745 --> 00:21:21,212
Well, two-thirds
of us did.
380
00:21:22,582 --> 00:21:25,483
See what I mean about
the cheerful part?
381
00:21:26,419 --> 00:21:28,286
You did that for me?
382
00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:33,491
Yeah, and the 10-Speed
which I won't be winning.
383
00:21:35,561 --> 00:21:38,929
I've been acting
like such a brat.
384
00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:40,431
I'm sorry.
385
00:21:40,433 --> 00:21:41,899
You're still grounded.
386
00:21:44,437 --> 00:21:46,737
I guess I could go
to college around here.
387
00:21:46,739 --> 00:21:48,839
- You could?
- Yeah.
388
00:21:48,841 --> 00:21:51,442
A lot of my friends are
going to state schools.
389
00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:53,110
It can't be that bad.
390
00:21:53,112 --> 00:21:56,947
Attagirl!
Eat your words.
391
00:21:56,949 --> 00:21:59,817
You never know, maybe in a year
or two I'll be able to transfer.
392
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:02,086
Well, sure, honey.
Who knows?
393
00:22:02,088 --> 00:22:05,323
Meanwhile, we'll
be living like kings
394
00:22:05,325 --> 00:22:10,461
on the Ochmonek's chickpeas
and cocktail onions.
395
00:22:10,463 --> 00:22:13,798
ALF, you can eat it all.
396
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:17,568
Okay. But I gotta tell ya,
there's tripe in there.
397
00:22:19,038 --> 00:22:22,973
Sweetheart, I'm so glad
you understand.
398
00:22:22,975 --> 00:22:25,109
Moosh alert!
399
00:22:25,111 --> 00:22:30,348
ALF, come on!
Sometimes moosh is nice.
400
00:22:30,350 --> 00:22:31,982
Oh, alright.
401
00:22:31,984 --> 00:22:36,287
Willie, I love you more
than chickpeas and tripe.
402
00:22:37,824 --> 00:22:39,657
The feeling is mutual.
403
00:22:39,659 --> 00:22:41,859
[instrumental music]
404
00:22:44,997 --> 00:22:47,531
Well, here's a place
you can save money.
405
00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:50,234
That's our fire
insurance premium.
406
00:22:50,236 --> 00:22:52,603
$3000 a year?
407
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:56,640
You know, it was
only $300 a year
408
00:22:56,642 --> 00:22:59,577
just before you moved in.
409
00:22:59,579 --> 00:23:01,746
Talk about inflation.
410
00:23:04,384 --> 00:23:09,520
Oh, look at this one.
Dental visits twice a year.
411
00:23:09,522 --> 00:23:11,055
You know what that costs?
412
00:23:11,057 --> 00:23:14,058
Forgive us, ALF,
we're fond of our teeth.
413
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:16,927
Trust me.
You can get by on four.
414
00:23:19,399 --> 00:23:21,599
Pet supplies?
415
00:23:21,601 --> 00:23:23,667
Well, I've got
a solution to that one.
416
00:23:25,538 --> 00:23:27,671
Just a thought.
417
00:23:27,673 --> 00:23:29,607
[instrumental music]
418
00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:35,780
[theme music]
419
00:24:00,740 --> 00:24:03,040
[ALF laughing]
33831
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.