Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:08,676
HI, GUYS.
2
00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:10,044
HI, DON.
HEY, DON.
OH, HEY, DON.
3
00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:13,147
YEAH, I JUST, YOU KNOW,
HAPPENED TO BE
IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD, AND, UH,
4
00:00:13,181 --> 00:00:14,282
HERE YOU GO, DICK.
5
00:00:14,315 --> 00:00:15,783
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
6
00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:18,419
IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY?
FOR ME?
7
00:00:18,452 --> 00:00:21,055
WELL, TOMORROW.
IT'S MAY 5, RIGHT?
8
00:00:21,089 --> 00:00:23,224
IF THAT'S WHAT I SAID,
THAT'S WHAT IT IS.
9
00:00:23,257 --> 00:00:24,592
MAY 5.
10
00:00:24,625 --> 00:00:25,426
WHAT YEAR?
11
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:28,129
EVERY YEAR.
12
00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:29,897
WELL, I WOULD HAVE
DROPPED BY TOMORROW,
13
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:31,065
BUT RUMOR HAS IT
14
00:00:31,099 --> 00:00:33,101
THAT THE, UH, FBI
15
00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:36,270
HAS AGENTS IN TOWN
LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY.
16
00:00:36,304 --> 00:00:38,239
THAT'S CLASSIFIED
INFORMATION.
17
00:00:38,272 --> 00:00:41,909
YOU HAVE NO IDEA,
DO YOU?
18
00:00:41,942 --> 00:00:44,078
THAT'S ALSO CLASSIFIED.
19
00:00:44,112 --> 00:00:46,280
WELL, I GOTTA GO.
SEE YOU, SALLY.
20
00:00:46,314 --> 00:00:47,881
TOMMY, DICK, HARRY.
21
00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:54,622
YOU KNOW,
I--I JUST NOTICED THAT
YOU'RE TOM, DICK, AND HARRY.
22
00:00:59,493 --> 00:01:00,861
SO?
23
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,830
SO TOM, DICK, AND HARRY.
24
00:01:02,863 --> 00:01:05,599
YOU KNOW, LIKE
"EVERY TOM, DICK, AND HARRY."
25
00:01:05,633 --> 00:01:07,034
WELL...THAT DOESN'T MEAN
26
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,670
THAT IT'S A CALCULATED
ATTEMPT ON OUR PART
TO SEEM AVERAGE.
27
00:01:09,703 --> 00:01:12,740
YEAH. I MEAN, WE JUST
PICKED NAMES AT RANDOM
28
00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:15,809
WHEN WE GOT HERE.
29
00:01:15,843 --> 00:01:19,313
I MEAN WHEN WE LANDED.
30
00:01:19,347 --> 00:01:21,048
BYE, DON.
31
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:23,484
BYE.
32
00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:24,685
WELL,
THAT WAS CLOSE.
33
00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:27,255
WAIT A MINUTE.
WEREN'T YOU LISTENING
TO WHAT DON JUST SAID?
34
00:01:27,288 --> 00:01:28,756
ABOUT OUR NAMES
BEING SUSPICIOUS?
35
00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:29,557
NO, NOT THAT.
36
00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:30,924
ABOUT THE FBI
BEING IN TOWN?
37
00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:32,293
NO, NO!
38
00:01:32,326 --> 00:01:34,828
ABOUT IT BEING
MY BIRTHDAY.
39
00:01:34,862 --> 00:01:36,597
DICK, IT'S YOUR FAKE
BIRTHDAY.
40
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:41,269
AND YOU'RE MY FAKE FAMILY,
AND NONE OF YOU REMEMBERED.
41
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:43,271
WAIT A MINUTE.
42
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:46,106
YOU'RE GIVING ME
A SURPRISE PARTY.
43
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:47,107
NO, WE'RE NOT.
44
00:01:47,141 --> 00:01:48,942
[SING-SONG]
YES, YOU ARE.
45
00:01:48,976 --> 00:01:50,110
NO, WE'RE NOT.
46
00:01:50,144 --> 00:01:51,379
YES, YOU ARE.
47
00:01:51,412 --> 00:01:53,347
YOU ARE THROWING ME
A SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY
TOMORROW NIGHT.
48
00:01:53,381 --> 00:01:54,982
THAT'S AN ORDER.
49
00:01:55,015 --> 00:01:56,350
WAIT. TOMORROW?!
50
00:01:56,384 --> 00:01:58,286
YES! AT 7 P.M. SHARP.
51
00:01:58,319 --> 00:01:59,787
OH! OH!
52
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:01,722
I'M GONNA BE SO SURPRISED.
53
00:02:38,526 --> 00:02:42,296
I, UH, HAVE YOUR EXAMS,
EVERYONE.
54
00:02:42,330 --> 00:02:43,664
BUT YOU DIDN'T
GRADE THESE.
55
00:02:43,697 --> 00:02:46,200
OH, MAN, HE'S NOT EVEN
GRADING THEM ANYMORE.
56
00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:47,501
WELL, IS THERE ANYONE HERE
57
00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:48,802
WHO THINKS
THEY MIGHT HAVE PASSED?
58
00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:51,339
YEAH. ALL RIGHT, THEN,
59
00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:54,141
THE IMPORTANT THING
IS THAT STAPLED TO EACH EXAM
60
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:57,945
IS AN INVITATION
TO MY BIRTHDAY PARTY.
61
00:02:57,978 --> 00:02:59,112
YOU'RE INVITING US
TO YOUR PARTY?
62
00:02:59,146 --> 00:03:00,881
I DIDN'T EVEN THINK
YOU LIKED US.
63
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:03,251
OH, BUG.
64
00:03:03,284 --> 00:03:05,686
I DON'T.
I LIKE PRESENTS.
65
00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:07,321
KEEP IN MIND,
I WILL BE AWARE
66
00:03:07,355 --> 00:03:10,691
OF ANY NO-SHOWS.
67
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:12,360
YOU KNOW,
DR. SOLOMON,
68
00:03:12,393 --> 00:03:14,462
THIS COULD BE
INTERPRETED
AS BLACKMAIL.
69
00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:15,263
UH, NO, CARYN.
70
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:17,931
IT'S EXTORTION.
71
00:03:17,965 --> 00:03:21,034
HE'S A PROFESSOR.
HE CAN'T CONTROL
OUR SOCIAL LIVES.
72
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,436
SO WILL YOU BE THERE,
PITMAN?
73
00:03:22,470 --> 00:03:24,305
ARE YOU KIDDING?
I WOULDN'T MISS IT.
74
00:03:36,116 --> 00:03:38,319
EH--EH--
HAVE YOU BEEN HERE
ALL SEMESTER?
75
00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:40,087
OH, NO.
I'M MRS. EVERLY,
76
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:41,855
AND THIS IS MY SON NED.
77
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:43,291
WE'RE AUDITING YOUR CLASS.
78
00:03:43,324 --> 00:03:44,157
I WASN'T INFORMED.
79
00:03:44,191 --> 00:03:46,794
OH, MY GOODNESS,
YOU'RE SMART.
80
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:47,928
OH.
81
00:03:47,961 --> 00:03:50,063
OH, MY GOODNESS,
YOU'RE PERCEPTIVE.
82
00:03:50,097 --> 00:03:52,266
EVERYONE TOLD US
WHAT A GENIUS YOU ARE,
83
00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:53,100
AND, BOY,
WERE THEY RIGHT.
84
00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:55,202
YOU'RE VERY UNUSUAL.
85
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:58,606
MAMA LIKES
THE UNUSUAL.
86
00:03:58,639 --> 00:04:00,941
OH, NOW, NED,
LET'S NOT BORE
THE GREAT MAN.
87
00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:02,543
WELL, I HOPE
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
88
00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:04,512
YOU CAN COUNT ON IT.
89
00:04:04,545 --> 00:04:05,946
[BELL RINGS]
90
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:08,048
OK, PEOPLE,
YOUR ASSIGNMENT IS
91
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:11,251
TO DISCUSS WHAT GIFTS
YOU WILL BE BUYING
FOR ME.
92
00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:12,653
AND--AND, SERIOUSLY,
93
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:13,987
TRY TO TOP EACH OTHER,
94
00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:15,188
CAN YOU?
95
00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:21,995
HI. IS DR. SOLOMON IN?
96
00:04:22,029 --> 00:04:24,332
WHY, YES, I AM.
97
00:04:24,365 --> 00:04:25,433
DR. DICK SOLOMON.
98
00:04:25,466 --> 00:04:27,335
OH, THAT DR. SOLOMON.
99
00:04:27,368 --> 00:04:29,537
HE'S NOT YOUR TYPE.
100
00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:32,272
I'M FROM THE PENDLETON
FAX LINE MAINTENANCE
DEPARTMENT.
101
00:04:32,306 --> 00:04:34,475
DON'T YOU MEAN
YOU'RE A PHONE GUY?
102
00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:36,810
HE KNOWS WHAT HE IS.
103
00:04:36,844 --> 00:04:41,214
THE FAX MACHINE
WOULD BE HERE
IN MY OFFICE.
104
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,817
WHERE I AM.
105
00:04:43,851 --> 00:04:44,752
THANKS.
106
00:04:47,588 --> 00:04:48,221
HOW DO I LOOK?
107
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:49,990
LOSE THE SWEATER.
108
00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:57,197
THIS IS FOR YOU.
109
00:04:57,230 --> 00:05:00,734
IT'S AN INVITATION
TO MY SURPRISE
BIRTHDAY PARTY.
110
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:02,636
IF YOU'RE HANDING OUT
INVITATIONS,
111
00:05:02,670 --> 00:05:04,004
HOW CAN IT BE A SURPRISE?
112
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:04,972
MARY, IT WON'T BE
113
00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:08,141
IF YOU KEEP WAVING
THE INVITATION AROUND.
114
00:05:08,175 --> 00:05:10,378
NOW, PUT THAT SOMEPLACE
WHERE I WON'T SEE IT.
115
00:05:10,411 --> 00:05:12,079
NINA!
116
00:05:12,112 --> 00:05:14,348
OH, UH, NINA,
THIS IS FOR YOU.
117
00:05:14,382 --> 00:05:15,549
YOU MUST BE DR. SOLOMON.
118
00:05:15,583 --> 00:05:18,519
YES. WOULD YOU
LIKE TO COME
TO MY SURPRISE PARTY?
119
00:05:18,552 --> 00:05:21,722
DON'T YOU HAVE SOMEWHERE
YOU HAVE TO BE?
120
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,190
NO.
121
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:25,493
MAMA!
122
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,595
I FOUND HIS DOOR.
123
00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:30,864
GOOD.
124
00:05:30,898 --> 00:05:33,701
THAT MUST BE
HIS DESK.
125
00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:35,268
NED, GET MAMA
A CHAIR.
126
00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:37,638
OK, MAMA.
127
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,172
MAY I HELP YOU?
128
00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:40,608
NO, YOU CAN'T.
129
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:45,846
NED, HONEY,
GO BACK TO THE MOTEL
AND WAIT.
130
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:48,181
I'M GOING
TO THE MOTEL NOW.
131
00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:49,617
THAT'S NICE.
132
00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:54,388
I'M GOING! I'M GOING!
133
00:05:54,422 --> 00:05:55,856
WELL, MRS. EVERLY,
HELLO.
134
00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:57,491
OH, PLEASE CALL ME
CHARLOTTE.
135
00:05:57,525 --> 00:06:00,561
ALL RIGHT.
CHARLOTTE.
136
00:06:00,594 --> 00:06:02,863
DR. SOLOMON,
I HAVE A CONFESSION.
137
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:05,065
I'M NOT SOME HOUSEWIFE
AUDITING A CLASS.
138
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:05,966
YOU'RE NOT?
139
00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:06,934
NO. I'M A REPORTER
140
00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,436
FROM THE CLEVELAND
PLAIN DEALER,
141
00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:10,270
AND I WANT TO DO
A STORY ON YOU.
142
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,371
ON ME?
143
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:14,041
YES, YOU SEE,
EVERY YEAR A DO A PIECE
ON GREATNESS.
144
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:16,577
HA HA HA HA HA!
145
00:06:19,346 --> 00:06:20,448
SORRY.
146
00:06:20,481 --> 00:06:22,349
I'VE DONE ALL SORTS
OF RESEARCH ON YOU,
147
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:25,318
AND FRANKLY, I'M IMPRESSED.
WILL YOU GRANT ME
AN INTERVIEW?
148
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:28,589
ALL RIGHT.
BUT I MUST ASK YOU
TO LIMIT YOUR DISCUSSION
149
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:29,823
TO MY GREATNESS.
150
00:06:29,857 --> 00:06:32,493
UH, NINA.
151
00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:33,060
WHAT?!
152
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,127
I'M GOING TO LUNCH NOW.
153
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:34,762
THEN GO.
154
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,096
COME ALONG, CHARLOTTE.
155
00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:38,599
AS TO GREATNESS,
I FIND THAT
SOME ARE BORN GREAT,
156
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:39,967
SOME ACHIEVE GREATNESS,
157
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,370
AND SOME
THRUST THEIR GREATNESS
UPON OTHERS.
158
00:06:47,708 --> 00:06:49,977
OK, SO WE GOT
10 OF THOSE.
159
00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:52,145
JUST BRING THE CHAIRS BACK
WHEN YOUR PARTY'S OVER.
160
00:06:52,179 --> 00:06:53,981
WHAT?
THESE ARE NOT CHAIRS.
161
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:54,815
THEY'RE FOLDING CHAIRS.
162
00:06:54,848 --> 00:06:59,052
AAH!
163
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:01,555
A FOLDING TABLE!
164
00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:04,925
GET OUTTA TOWN!
165
00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:06,694
WELL, YOU COULD ALWAYS
USE IT FOR THE BAR.
166
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:08,395
BAR? WHY DO WE
NEED A BAR?
167
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,631
WELL, IT'S A PARTY,
YOU KNOW.
YOU GOTTA SERVE DRINKS,
168
00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:13,333
LIQUOR, WHATNOT.
169
00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:16,169
OK. BOOZE.
HOW MUCH DO WE GET?
170
00:07:16,203 --> 00:07:18,739
I ALWAYS FIGURE
3/4 OF AN OUNCE OF LIQUOR
171
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:22,242
PER 20 POUNDS OF GUEST.
172
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:24,478
NOW, FOR A 200-POUND MAN,
YOU'RE GONNA NEED
173
00:07:24,512 --> 00:07:26,814
ABOUT A HALF A QUART
OF VODKA.
174
00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:28,215
GREAT. NOW I GOTTA
CALL EVERYBODY
175
00:07:28,248 --> 00:07:30,851
TO ASK THEM
HOW MUCH THEY WEIGH.
176
00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:33,186
PUT ME DOWN
AT 300 POUNDS.
177
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:36,724
WELL, I...
178
00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:38,492
I'M BIG-BONED.
179
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:43,797
BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY
180
00:07:43,831 --> 00:07:45,766
I KNOW A LOT.
181
00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:47,334
SOME OF IT
I DON'T DARE TEACH.
182
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:48,368
IT'S A TERRIBLE DILEMMA.
183
00:07:48,401 --> 00:07:49,770
MY STUDENTS ARE SLOW,
184
00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:53,874
AND I AM
INCREDIBLY SMART.
185
00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:58,245
SHOULDN'T YOU BE
WRITING THIS DOWN?
IT'S REALLY GOOD.
186
00:07:58,278 --> 00:08:00,881
I HAVE A CONFESSION
TO MAKE.
187
00:08:00,914 --> 00:08:02,516
I'M NOT A REPORTER.
188
00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:03,316
YOU'RE NOT?
189
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:05,185
OH, PLEASE FORGIVE ME.
190
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:06,353
I'M JUST
ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE
191
00:08:06,386 --> 00:08:09,022
WHO CRAVES BEING AROUND
PERSONAL EXCELLENCE.
192
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:11,559
I GUESS YOU COULD SAY
I'M THE INTELLECTUAL
EQUIVALENT
193
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:13,326
OF A ROCK 'N' ROLL GROUPIE.
194
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,228
OHH...WELL,
195
00:08:15,262 --> 00:08:15,929
THAT'S OK.
196
00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:16,930
I'VE ALWAYS
THOUGHT OF MYSELF
197
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:21,201
AS THE INTELLECTUAL
EQUIVALENT OF
ROD STEWART.
198
00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:23,704
SO HAVE I. EVER SINCE
I READ YOUR ESSAY
199
00:08:23,737 --> 00:08:25,172
IN THE UNIVERSITY PAPER.
200
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:28,408
MY OPEN LETTER TO FORMER
TRANSPORTATION SECRETARY
FREDERICO PEÑA
201
00:08:28,441 --> 00:08:31,044
ABOUT THE BENEFITS
OF TIME TRAVEL?
202
00:08:31,078 --> 00:08:33,080
THAT'S THE ONE.
AND I THOUGHT,
203
00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:35,649
HOW DID THIS BRILLIANT MIND
SUDDENLY APPEAR
OUT OF NOWHERE
204
00:08:35,683 --> 00:08:37,450
IN THE MIDDLE OF OHIO?
205
00:08:37,484 --> 00:08:40,554
THAT'S WHEN I KNEW
I HAD TO COME AND FIND YOU.
206
00:08:40,588 --> 00:08:42,022
YOU KNOW SOMETHING,
CHARLOTTE?
207
00:08:42,055 --> 00:08:44,424
I'M HAVING A SURPRISE
BIRTHDAY PARTY
TOMORROW NIGHT.
208
00:08:44,457 --> 00:08:48,461
WHY DON'T YOU COME?
AND--AND BUY ME
SOMETHING NICE.
209
00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:53,266
WELL, WHAT DO I GET
FOR THE MAN
WHO KNOWS EVERYTHING?
210
00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:55,569
CASHMERE UNDERPANTS.
211
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,808
YOU SEE, WHAT I WOULD DO
IS CUT UP SOME VEGETABLES
212
00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:04,845
AND THEN HOLLOW OUT
A PRETTY RED CABBAGE
AND PUT YOUR DIP IN IT.
213
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,580
IT'S GENIUS!
214
00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:08,682
OH, CHARLOTTE,
THANK GOD YOU STOPPED BY.
215
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:10,217
WHERE DID DICK
FIND YOU?
216
00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:12,552
HEY. WHAT'S NED DOING?
217
00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:15,355
HEH HEH.
218
00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:18,258
HE PROBABLY JUST SMELLS
PEANUT BUTTER.
219
00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:21,194
YEAH, YEAH.
I'M THE SAME WAY.
220
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,963
CHARLOTTE.
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
221
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:24,197
ONLY SAVING OUR BUTTS.
222
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:26,466
YEAH. MRS. DUBCEK,
SHE WAS OUR PARTY
EXPERT,
223
00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:27,868
BUT SHE'S GONE AND
DISAPPEARED ON US.
224
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,537
BUT GOD SENT US DOWN
THIS ANGEL.
225
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:31,739
OH, HUSH, NOW.
226
00:09:31,772 --> 00:09:35,542
I'M JUST DOING MY PART
TO CELEBRATE
A GREAT MAN'S BIRTHDAY.
227
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:39,246
JUST WHEN I THINK
YOU'RE TOO GOOD
TO BE TRUE, YOU ARE.
228
00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:41,649
MAMA.
229
00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:43,183
THEY DON'T HAVE A SOFA.
230
00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:49,489
WELL, ANYWAY,
SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING
ABOUT ORGANIZING A PARTY.
231
00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:52,059
OH, YEAH. TELL HIM
ABOUT THAT SOUP MIX
WITH THE SOUR CREAM.
232
00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:54,561
OH, NOW, IT'S ON
THE BACK OF THE PACKET.
233
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,897
THEY PUT YOUR RECIPE
ON THE BACK
OF THE PACKET?
234
00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:58,398
SHE'S BEEN PUBLISHED!
235
00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,700
I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU'RE ALL
236
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,669
PUTTING MY
NUMBER-ONE FAN
TO WORK.
237
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:05,405
OH...PISH TOSH.
238
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:09,076
I HAVE A CONFESSION.
239
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:13,146
BEFORE I CAME HERE,
I WAS SOCIAL DIRECTOR
FOR CARNIVAL CRUISE LINES,
240
00:10:13,180 --> 00:10:18,185
AND...IF ONLY I HAD A LIST
SO I'D KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE
WERE COMING.
241
00:10:20,888 --> 00:10:23,323
WE HAVE SUCH A LIST.
242
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,025
A GUEST LIST.
243
00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:27,928
HARRY, GO GET IT!
IT'S IN THE OTHER ROOM!
244
00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:37,738
YOU KNOW,
I DON'T GET TO SAY THIS
245
00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:39,773
TO A LOT OF PEOPLE,
BUT...
246
00:10:39,807 --> 00:10:42,475
I'M SMARTER THAN YOU.
247
00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:48,548
HELLO, BUG?
248
00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:50,150
YES, UH,
I'M CALLING TO TELL YOU
249
00:10:50,183 --> 00:10:52,152
THAT DR. SOLOMON'S PARTY
HAS BEEN CANCELED.
250
00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:56,289
HE HAS A TERRIBLE CASE
OF DIARRHEA AND HE WANTS
EVERYONE TO KNOW.
251
00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:58,926
YES. BYE-BYE.
252
00:10:58,959 --> 00:10:59,760
HAVE YOU GOT EVERYTHING?
253
00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:01,194
YES, MAMA.
254
00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:02,462
GOOD BOY.
255
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:03,897
[THUMPING]
256
00:11:03,931 --> 00:11:05,165
HEY, YOU!
257
00:11:05,198 --> 00:11:08,936
Charlotte:
TITTY TITTY BANG BANG.
258
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:10,470
ONE MORE NOISE
OUT OF YOU
259
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,540
AND NED HERE
WILL POP YOUR NECK
LIKE A PENCIL.
260
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:16,176
I GOT MY EYE ON YOU.
261
00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:21,314
OOH.
262
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:22,549
I GOT YOU SOMETHING.
263
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:24,484
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
264
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:25,853
DON'T YOU WANT TO
GIVE THAT TO ME LATER,
265
00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:29,923
SHOULD SOME SORT OF...
PARTY ARISE?
266
00:11:29,957 --> 00:11:32,325
I GOT A MESSAGE
THE PARTY WAS CANCELED.
267
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:34,795
VERY GOOD.
268
00:11:34,828 --> 00:11:35,929
I GOT THAT MESSAGE, TOO.
269
00:11:35,963 --> 00:11:38,298
MM. SO I GUESS
I WON'T BE SEEING
EITHER OF YOU
270
00:11:38,331 --> 00:11:41,701
AROUND, UH, 7:00-ISH?
271
00:11:41,735 --> 00:11:42,502
THAT'S RIGHT.
272
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:43,937
GOOD. GOOD.
273
00:11:43,971 --> 00:11:44,972
OH, OH, AND BY THE WAY,
274
00:11:45,005 --> 00:11:47,274
DON'T FORGET TO PARK
WHERE I CAN'T SEE
YOUR CAR.
275
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:49,309
NOT A PROBLEM.
276
00:11:49,342 --> 00:11:51,544
YEP. I'LL NEVER
SEE IT COMING.
277
00:11:57,084 --> 00:12:01,188
WELL, WELL, HERE I AM.
278
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,424
HOME AT LAST.
279
00:12:04,457 --> 00:12:06,760
HELLO!
280
00:12:06,794 --> 00:12:10,197
ANYBODY HO-O-OME?!
281
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,531
I GUESS I'M HERE
282
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:14,534
ALL ALO-ONE!
283
00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,422
[DRILL BUZZES]
284
00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:36,689
MAMA.
285
00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:37,825
HE'S COMIN' AROUND.
286
00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,226
UH--UH, CHARLOTTE,
287
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:41,028
UH, WH-WH-WHAT
ARE YOU DOING?
288
00:12:41,061 --> 00:12:42,629
WELL, FIRST WE'RE GONNA
CUT YOUR HEAD OPEN.
289
00:12:42,662 --> 00:12:43,964
WHAT? WHY?!
290
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,165
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
291
00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:46,733
COULD IT POSSIBLY BE
BECAUSE
292
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,168
YOU'RE AN ALIEN?!
293
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:49,069
ALIEN?
294
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:49,970
[HIGH-PITCHED
NERVOUS LAUGH]
HA HA HA HA!
295
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:52,139
THAT'S FUNNY.
296
00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:54,875
YOU'RE A VERY FUNNY
WOMAN. HA HA HA...
297
00:12:54,908 --> 00:12:56,409
YOU THINK I'M STUPID?
298
00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:58,178
I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOU
FOR OVER A YEAR NOW,
299
00:12:58,211 --> 00:13:00,180
AND ALL SIGNS
POINT TO ALIEN.
300
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:02,015
W-WELL,
DON'T SOME SIGNS
301
00:13:02,049 --> 00:13:06,219
POINT TO ECCENTRIC
OR DUTCH OR SOMETHING?
302
00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:09,389
THERE ARE POWERFUL
ELECTROMAGNETIC SIGNALS
COMING FROM THIS HOUSE.
303
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:13,360
OH, WE'VE BEEN
MICROWAVING
WITH THE DOOR OPEN.
304
00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:16,096
THERE'S A TRANSMITTER
HERE SOMEWHERE.
305
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:17,630
AND WE CAN'T FIND IT.
306
00:13:17,664 --> 00:13:19,900
I HAVE A THEORY
IT'S INSTALLED
307
00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:21,234
INSIDE OF YOU.
308
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:22,469
[DRILL BUZZES]
309
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:24,804
HELP! HELP!
HELP! HELP! HE--
310
00:13:24,838 --> 00:13:26,439
Don: HELLO?
311
00:13:26,473 --> 00:13:28,208
HELLO! IS ANYBODY HOME?
312
00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:30,143
DAMN! GO SEE WHO THAT IS.
313
00:13:33,881 --> 00:13:35,115
HI.
314
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:37,350
WHO ARE YOU?
315
00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:40,387
MAMA, THERE'S
A POLICEMAN OUT HERE.
316
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,788
HELLO, OFFICER.
317
00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:43,891
HI. UH, YOU TWO
HERE FOR THE PARTY?
318
00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:45,458
OH, DIDN'T YOU
GET A CALL?
319
00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,327
NO. WHEN'S IT START?
320
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:48,428
YOU KNOW,
I'M ON DUTY.
321
00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:52,665
I'M ONLY GONNA HAVE TIME
FOR, LIKE 2 OR 3 DRINKS.
322
00:13:52,699 --> 00:13:54,101
WHERE IS EVERYBODY?
323
00:13:54,134 --> 00:13:55,568
WELL, IT'S A SURPRISE PARTY,
324
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:57,837
SO EVERYBODY'S HIDING
DOWN IN THE BASEMENT.
325
00:13:57,871 --> 00:13:59,572
OH. HA HA HA!
326
00:13:59,606 --> 00:14:00,740
HA HA HA HA.
327
00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:01,975
HA HA.
328
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:06,613
YOU'RE WHO AGAIN?
329
00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:07,380
OH.
330
00:14:07,414 --> 00:14:08,315
CATERING.
331
00:14:08,348 --> 00:14:08,781
[SNAPS RUBBER GLOVE]
332
00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:10,650
AH! HA HA HA...
333
00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:11,919
COME ON, LET'S GO!
334
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:14,087
OH, OK.
335
00:14:14,121 --> 00:14:14,955
AFTER YOU.
336
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:17,424
NO, AFTER YOU.
337
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:20,293
YAAAHH!
338
00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:25,632
WOW. I HAVEN'T BEEN
DRUGGED AND TIED
UP LIKE THIS
339
00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:30,037
SINCE VALENTINE'S DAY.
340
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:30,938
OHH!
341
00:14:30,971 --> 00:14:32,372
IT'S DON!
HE'S CAPTURED THEM
342
00:14:32,405 --> 00:14:34,975
AND COME TO RESCUE US.
343
00:14:37,911 --> 00:14:38,611
OH...
344
00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:43,016
WHY DOES HE
HAVE TO BE SO TIRED?
345
00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:44,451
Tommy: ALL RIGHT,
THAT IS IT!
346
00:14:44,484 --> 00:14:45,618
WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?
347
00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:47,454
LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW.
348
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:48,355
I JUST WISH I KNEW
349
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:50,323
WHICH ONE OF YOU
HAS THE TRANSMITTER.
350
00:14:50,357 --> 00:14:52,993
THAT'S THE HEAD
I REALLY WANT TO CUT OPEN.
351
00:14:54,661 --> 00:14:56,696
* LA LA LA...
352
00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:22,322
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
353
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:23,590
I'LL GET IT.
354
00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:27,260
MARY ALBRIGHT'S OFFICE.
355
00:15:27,294 --> 00:15:30,030
MMMPH! MMPHMMPHH!
356
00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:31,031
OH, YEAH.
357
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,799
OH, BABY.
MMMPHHGGHH!
358
00:15:32,832 --> 00:15:34,701
MMPHHHGH!
I'M HOT NOW.
359
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,203
DO ME.
MMMPHH!
360
00:15:36,236 --> 00:15:38,038
MMMPHHH!
DO ME ALL NIGHT.
361
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:41,374
AAHMMPHHH!
362
00:15:41,408 --> 00:15:43,043
I KNOW IT'S YOU, DICK.
363
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:46,879
[MUFFLED] DAMN!
364
00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:48,848
THAT WAS DICK?
365
00:15:48,881 --> 00:15:52,685
YES, WITH HIS TYPICAL
SICK, PATHETIC
CRY FOR ATTENTION.
366
00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:54,821
OH, GOD,
IT IS HIS BIRTHDAY,
367
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:58,125
AND HIS PARTY
WAS CANCELED.
368
00:15:58,158 --> 00:16:00,827
I THINK I'M JUST GONNA BRING
HIS PRESENT ON OVER THERE.
369
00:16:00,860 --> 00:16:02,029
I'LL GO WITH YOU.
370
00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:03,496
I WANT TO SEE
THE LOOK ON HIS FACE
371
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:05,732
WHEN I TELL HIM
I DIDN'T GET HIM
ANYTHING.
372
00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:12,005
DIALING THE PHONE
WITH YOUR NOSE.
373
00:16:12,039 --> 00:16:14,741
A CLASSIC ALIEN MANEUVER.
374
00:16:16,509 --> 00:16:18,745
ONCE I'M DONE WITH YOU,
EVERYONE WILL KNOW THE TRUTH.
375
00:16:18,778 --> 00:16:20,747
GO ON, ADMIT IT.
YOU'RE ALIENS!
376
00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:21,681
NO!
377
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:23,350
OH, WELL, MAYBE
I'M JUST WASTING MY TIME
378
00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:24,351
WITH YOU, THEN.
379
00:16:24,384 --> 00:16:25,718
MAYBE I'LL JUST
GO DOWN THERE
TO THE BASEMENT
380
00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:28,688
AND CRACK OPEN
THAT BIG BLONDE'S HEAD.
381
00:16:28,721 --> 00:16:33,393
UH--NO! NO! NO! WAIT!
382
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:35,428
ALL RIGHT,
I ADMIT IT.
I'M AN ALIEN.
383
00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:36,129
I KNEW IT.
384
00:16:36,163 --> 00:16:37,564
BUT I'M THE ONLY ONE.
385
00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:40,033
THE OTHER THREE
ARE INNOCENT BYSTANDERS.
386
00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,801
DO WHAT YOU WILL
WITH ME!
387
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:45,138
WHICH I HOPE
IS A SEVERE SCOLDING.
388
00:16:45,172 --> 00:16:47,107
BUT SPARE THEM!
389
00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:48,375
I DON'T THINK SO.
390
00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:49,676
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?
391
00:16:49,709 --> 00:16:52,345
WE COME IN PEACE!
WE MEAN YOU NO HARM.
392
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:53,646
NO HARM?
393
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,416
I'M WELL AWARE
OF WHAT YOUR KIND DOES.
394
00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,151
HARVESTING EGGS
FOR YOUR SLAVE RACE,
395
00:16:58,185 --> 00:17:00,253
SUCKING THE LIFE
FROM THE INNOCENT,
396
00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:03,956
PROBING THE BUTT
OF THE POOR AMERICAN
FARMER!
397
00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:06,459
WE NEVER DO ANY OF THAT.
398
00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:10,497
WELL, THERE WAS
THIS ONE FARMER
NEAR AKRON.
399
00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,299
YOU KNOW...
400
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,867
BUT HE WAS ASKING FOR IT!
401
00:17:14,901 --> 00:17:16,269
I'VE HEARD ENOUGH!
CORK HIM!
402
00:17:16,303 --> 00:17:18,471
NO! NO! PLEASE!
LET ME--AAH--
403
00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:20,107
DR. SOLOMON?
404
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,275
DR. SOLOMON?
405
00:17:22,309 --> 00:17:22,975
EXCUSE ME.
406
00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:24,344
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
407
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,012
I CALLED YOU AND TOLD YOU
THERE WAS NO PARTY.
408
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:28,881
YEAH, I KNOW.
409
00:17:28,915 --> 00:17:30,717
WILL DO THINGS
TO TRICK ME,
410
00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:32,519
AND THEN HE YELLS AT ME.
411
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,520
UH, YOU KNOW,
412
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,555
ALL THE OTHER GUESTS
ARE HIDING IN THE BASEMENT,
413
00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:37,190
SO COME ON, LET'S GO.
414
00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:39,726
I KNEW
THERE WAS A PARTY. OH.
415
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,328
OH, NO, NO.
AFTER YOU.
416
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:45,064
Mary: HELLO!
417
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:46,466
I THOUGHT WE WERE
GOING DOWNSTAIRS.
418
00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:47,567
NOT JUST YET.
419
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,236
OH, I LEFT MY GIFT
IN THE CAR.
420
00:17:49,269 --> 00:17:50,570
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
421
00:17:50,603 --> 00:17:51,971
SHOULDN'T WE BE
GETTING TO THE BASEMENT?
422
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,373
UH...
BEFORE WE GO DOWN,
423
00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:55,242
HOW ABOUT A NICE
GLASS OF WINE?
424
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:56,209
YEAH.
ALL RIGHT.
425
00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:59,312
HONEY, GET THAT
SPECIAL BOTTLE
OUT OF MY BAG.
426
00:17:59,346 --> 00:18:00,680
COME ON, EVERYBODY,
INTO THE KITCHEN.
427
00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:02,582
LET'S MOVE IT!
GRAB YOUR GLASS!
428
00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:05,552
I DON'T HAVE ALL DAY.
429
00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:06,953
I THINK
YOU'LL LIKE THIS.
430
00:18:06,986 --> 00:18:08,455
IT'S
A VERY GOOD YEAR.
431
00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:10,557
I'M AFRAID
I DON'T LIKE RED WINE.
432
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:11,391
I LO IT.
433
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:13,993
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
434
00:18:14,026 --> 00:18:16,563
POUR HERS FIRST.
435
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,200
DON'T WE NEED
A TOAST?
436
00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:21,000
ALL RIGHT.
437
00:18:21,033 --> 00:18:22,869
HERE'S A TOAST
TO HAPPY BIRTHDAYS.
438
00:18:22,902 --> 00:18:24,537
HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!
HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!
439
00:18:28,708 --> 00:18:29,776
HMM.
440
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,444
WHAT'S THAT AFTERTASTE?
441
00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:36,649
Mary: HELLO! I'M BACK!
442
00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:38,017
OH, CRAP!
443
00:18:40,587 --> 00:18:42,222
DID EVERYONE
GO DOWNSTAIRS?
444
00:18:42,255 --> 00:18:45,925
OH, THEY WENT DOWN,
ALL RIGHT.
445
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,026
SHUT UP, HONEY.
446
00:18:47,059 --> 00:18:48,195
WHERE'S
THE BIRTHDAY BOY?
447
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,196
OH, HE'S LATE.
448
00:18:49,229 --> 00:18:50,197
OF COURSE.
449
00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:53,766
HOW ABOUT A GLASS OF WINE
WHILE YOU'RE WAITING?
450
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,403
IT'S SO NICE OF YOU
TO HELP OUT, CHARLOTTE.
451
00:18:58,104 --> 00:19:00,440
MM.
452
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,541
DICK'S LATE.
453
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:03,776
THAT'S TYPICAL.
454
00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,815
HE PLANS HIS OWN
SURPRISE PARTY,
455
00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:10,116
AND THEN
IT'S CALLED OFF,
456
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,118
AND THEN
IT'S BACK ON.
457
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:19,992
I GUESS WE DON'T KNOW
WHETHER IT'S ON OR OFF!
458
00:19:20,026 --> 00:19:23,029
MMM. THIS IS SCREW-TOP.
THIS IS GOOD.
459
00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:32,872
IF DICK'S NOT HERE
IN 15 MINUTES,
I AM LEAVING.
460
00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:34,841
WHEN A MAN DOESN'T HAVE
THE COMMON COURTESY TO--
461
00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:35,508
OOH!
462
00:19:38,110 --> 00:19:39,379
IT'S OFFICIAL.
463
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:43,850
THIS IS THE WORST PARTY
I'VE EVER BEEN TO.
464
00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:44,617
SALLY!
465
00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,486
STAND WITH ME
IF YOU CAN.
466
00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:49,489
UHH! UHH!
467
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,724
I HAVE A--A JACKKNIFE
IN MY POCKET.
468
00:19:51,758 --> 00:19:53,793
IF YOU CAN REACH IT,
WE CAN CUT THROUGH
THESE ROPES.
469
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:54,661
ALL RIGHT.
470
00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:55,862
HARRY, LEAN TO YOUR LEFT.
471
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:56,863
OK.
472
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:58,698
SALLY, TURN RIGHT.
TURN RIGHT.
473
00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:00,132
ALL RIGHT. AND IT'S--
474
00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:01,568
CAN YOU FEEL IT?
IT'S RIGHT WHERE
YOUR HAND IS.
475
00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:03,403
I CAN'T REACH IT.
476
00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:04,737
KEEP TRYING.
YOU'RE ALMOST THERE.
477
00:20:04,771 --> 00:20:06,506
ALL RIGHT. YEAH.
478
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:07,907
YEAH. OH. OH.
479
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:10,142
OK, CAREFUL, SALLY,
THAT'S NOT...
480
00:20:10,176 --> 00:20:10,877
UH...
481
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:11,578
OH...
482
00:20:11,611 --> 00:20:12,879
OHH...
483
00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:15,482
OOH, BOY.
484
00:20:15,515 --> 00:20:17,250
I GOT IT.
485
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:23,456
WELL, DON'T JUST
STAND THERE.
CUT US OUT.
486
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:27,260
YOU KNOW,
487
00:20:27,294 --> 00:20:29,662
I'VE NEVER BEEN
IN A HOSTAGE SITUATION
BEFORE,
488
00:20:29,696 --> 00:20:32,332
BUT I THINK YOU SHOULD BE
ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.
489
00:20:36,969 --> 00:20:38,538
[BUZZING]
490
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,139
OH, MY GOD, DICK!
491
00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:41,508
OH, GOD!
OH, MY GOD!
492
00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:44,444
STAND BACK
OR THE SPACEMAN GETS IT!
493
00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:45,612
FREEZE, EVERYBODY!
OH, MY GOD!
494
00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:46,546
FBI! FREEZE!
495
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:48,681
Ned: MAMA.
PUT THOSE TWO
IN CUFFS.
496
00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:49,982
SOMEBODY UNTIE THAT MAN.
497
00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:52,485
Charlotte:
NO! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
498
00:20:52,519 --> 00:20:53,786
HE'S ONE OF THEM!
499
00:20:53,820 --> 00:20:56,155
LET ME OPEN HIM UP.
YOU'LL SEE HE'S AN ALIEN.
500
00:20:56,188 --> 00:20:58,525
YEAH, RIGHT, CHARLOTTE.
SO WERE THE OTHER 8
YOU CUT UP.
501
00:20:58,558 --> 00:21:00,760
OK, FINE.
BUT THIS ONE IS.
502
00:21:00,793 --> 00:21:01,961
HE ADMITTED IT.
503
00:21:01,994 --> 00:21:03,563
I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE.
504
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,131
YOU CAN'T HIDE!
505
00:21:05,164 --> 00:21:06,966
ALIENS!
506
00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:09,369
ALIENS!
507
00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:14,674
ALIENS, HUH?
508
00:21:14,707 --> 00:21:14,941
[ALL LAUGHING]
509
00:21:14,974 --> 00:21:17,510
YEAH.
510
00:21:17,544 --> 00:21:28,054
THAT'S THE DUMBEST THING
I EVER HEARD!
511
00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:30,857
YOU KNOW,
I COULDN'T HELP BUT NOTICE
YOU FEDERAL BOYS
512
00:21:30,890 --> 00:21:33,893
LEFT A CRUCIAL
PIECE OF EVIDENCE
AT THE CRIME SCENE.
513
00:21:33,926 --> 00:21:35,194
THE GNOME.
514
00:21:35,227 --> 00:21:35,962
THE GNOME?
515
00:21:35,995 --> 00:21:37,930
YEAH. THE BLUNT INSTRUMENT.
516
00:21:37,964 --> 00:21:41,000
AND LOCAL BOY DONNIE
PICKED IT UP FOR YOU.
517
00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:43,636
YEP. JUST COVERING
YOUR ASS.
518
00:21:46,339 --> 00:21:48,341
SHALL WE STEAL
THE CAR, MAMA?
519
00:21:48,375 --> 00:21:49,376
NO, HONEY.
520
00:21:49,409 --> 00:21:51,177
THAT WOULD BE WRONG.
34515
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.