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1
00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:11,112
GOOD MORNING, NINA...
2
00:00:11,879 --> 00:00:13,547
[COOLLY]
MARY.
3
00:00:14,948 --> 00:00:16,384
[ICILY]
MORNING.
4
00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:19,287
I, UH...
LIKE YOUR BELT,
DR. SOLOMON.
5
00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:22,656
THIS ISN'T A BELT,
NINA. IT'S A TIE.
6
00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:24,892
I THINK SOMEBODY'S
GETTING A SPARE TIRE.
7
00:00:24,925 --> 00:00:26,360
FORGET IT, MARY.
IT'S A LITTLE LATE
8
00:00:26,394 --> 00:00:29,930
TO TRY TO BUY
MY AFFECTION WITH GIFTS.
9
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,432
I MEANT
YOU'VE GAINED WEIGHT.
10
00:00:31,465 --> 00:00:33,867
WHY SHOULD I BE CONCERNED
ABOUT GAINING WEIGHT?
11
00:00:33,901 --> 00:00:37,871
MY BODY
IS JUST THE VEHICLE THAT
CARRIES MY BRAIN AROUND,
12
00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:41,875
AND MY BRAIN DESERVES
A SMOOTH, LUXURIOUS RIDE.
13
00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:43,977
OK, DICK. GET FAT.
I DON'T CARE.
14
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,379
WELL, I DON'T CARE
IF YOU DO CARE.
15
00:00:45,413 --> 00:00:47,815
AS IF I CARED
THAT YOU DIDN'T CARE
THAT I CARED.
16
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:50,684
AS IF I CARED
THAT YOU DO CARE
IF I CARE OR NOT.
17
00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:54,922
I COULDN'T CARE LESS
IF YOU CARE THAT I CARE!
18
00:00:57,325 --> 00:01:00,828
WELL, NOW, THAT
WAS UNCALLED FOR!
19
00:01:07,301 --> 00:01:08,202
PEANUT BRITTLE?
20
00:01:08,236 --> 00:01:10,204
YOU KNOW, DR. SOLOMON,
21
00:01:10,238 --> 00:01:12,340
SOMETIMES WHEN THERE ARE
CHANGES IN YOUR LIFE,
22
00:01:12,373 --> 00:01:15,209
YOU USE EATING
AS A WAY OF FILLING
THAT VOID.
23
00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:18,045
CHANGES? WELL, NOTHING
HAS CHANGED IN MY LIFE.
24
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:21,249
WELL, EXCEPT FOR THE FACT
THAT MARY AND I
ARE NO LONGER...
25
00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:23,917
ROMPING LUSTFULLY
IN PASTURES OF DELIGHT,
26
00:01:23,951 --> 00:01:27,388
OUR WRITHING BODIES
ETERNALLY ENTWINED,
27
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:30,358
GLISTENING
LIKE THE MORNING DEW.
28
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:33,727
BINGO.
29
00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,996
[UNCLEARLY]
OH, POPPYCOCK!
30
00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:37,665
YOU DON'T SEE
MARY GAINING WEIGHT,
31
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:39,967
AND SHE'S LOST
A LOT MORE
THAN I HAVE!
32
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,870
SHE LOST ME!
33
00:01:43,771 --> 00:01:45,206
DID YOU HEAR
ABOUT THAT GUY
34
00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:49,810
WHO CUT OFF HIS FINGER
IN SHOP CLASS, AND THEN
SEWED IT BACK ON IN HOME EC?
35
00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:53,046
THAT'S JUST
AN URBAN MYTH.
36
00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:56,384
OH, DID YOU WANT TO SEE
THUNDER TRAIN?
IT'S PLAYING AT 6:00.
37
00:01:56,417 --> 00:02:00,288
I ALREADY SAW IT.
WHEN DID YOU SEE IT?
38
00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,155
JUST THE OTHER NIGHT.
39
00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:03,023
YOU NEVER GO
TO THE MOVIES
BY YOURSELF.
40
00:02:03,056 --> 00:02:04,892
WELL...YEAH, BUT...
41
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:07,261
WENDY REALLY
WANTED TO SEE IT.
42
00:02:07,295 --> 00:02:08,596
WAIT, WAIT. WAIT.
43
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:11,765
YOU SAW IT ALONE...
WITH WENDY?
44
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:15,102
WELL,
I COULDN'T VERY WELL
HAVE BEEN ALONE
45
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:18,872
IF I SAW IT
WITH WENDY...
NOW, COULD I?
46
00:02:23,211 --> 00:02:25,213
AAH!
47
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:30,684
WHY ARE YOU SO JUMPY?
48
00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:35,155
I'M SMACK DAB IN
THE MIDDLE OF
"DYING IS DEADLY"
49
00:02:35,189 --> 00:02:38,359
NUMBER 14
IN THE ANSON NEMBROOK
DETECTIVE SERIES.
50
00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:40,127
OH, IT'S A GRIPPER.
51
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,695
I THINK AUGUST
IS CHEATING ON ME.
52
00:02:41,729 --> 00:02:45,799
WHY? DID SHE TAKE OUT
A BIG INSURANCE POLICY
ON YOU
53
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:49,470
AND THEN HAVE HER LOVER
CUT YOUR BRAKE LINES?
54
00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:50,771
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO DO.
55
00:02:50,804 --> 00:02:52,806
WELL, DON'T ASK ME.
56
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:56,644
I'M 3 DAYS AWAY
FROM RETIREMENT.
57
00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:57,645
I GOTTA KNOW.
58
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,813
OK! YOU TALKED ME
INTO IT.
59
00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:01,415
I'LL TAIL HER
FOR YA.
60
00:03:01,449 --> 00:03:02,683
I COULD DO THAT.
61
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:04,818
OH, YEAH, BUT
SHE KNOWS YOU.
62
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,887
SHE KNOWS YOU, TOO.
63
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,523
WELL, YEAH,
BUT NOT INTIMATELY.
64
00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:11,725
ME, NEITHER.
65
00:03:11,759 --> 00:03:15,629
REALLY? WELL, THEN
WHY DO YOU CARE?
66
00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:19,267
OH!
67
00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:22,503
WELL, THAT LOOKS
PRETTY CRAPPY.
68
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,638
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
I DID EVERYTHING
I'M SUPPOSED TO DO.
69
00:03:24,672 --> 00:03:26,173
IT'S JUST NOT WORKING.
70
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,476
MARTHA STEWART SAYS
IT HELPS IF YOU TALK
TO YOUR PLANTS.
71
00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:30,711
OH, YEAH?
MMM.
72
00:03:32,513 --> 00:03:34,014
HI.
73
00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:40,421
I'M SALLY.
74
00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:42,590
Dick: SALLY!
75
00:03:42,623 --> 00:03:44,692
[PANTING]
76
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:48,028
SALLY,
DO I LOOK FAT?
77
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,330
YOU WANT THE TRUTH?
NO.
78
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:50,931
YOU LOOK GREAT.
YOU DON'T MEAN THAT.
79
00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:53,401
OK.
80
00:03:53,434 --> 00:03:54,368
WELL, THANKS A LOT!
81
00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:57,237
OH, DICK, JUST BE
THANKFUL YOU'RE A MAN.
82
00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:59,473
YOU KNOW,
I MEAN, YOU GUYS
CAN GET AWAY WITH IT.
83
00:03:59,507 --> 00:04:01,542
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
84
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:04,144
OH, DON'T I? YOU KNOW,
85
00:04:04,177 --> 00:04:06,213
THE ONLY TIME
A WOMAN IS ALLOWED
TO GET FAT
86
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,081
IS WHEN SHE'S PREGNANT,
BUT SHE CAN'T
EVEN ENJOY IT
87
00:04:08,115 --> 00:04:12,653
BECAUSE SHE'S BARFING
ALL THE TIME AND HER BOOBS
ARE TURNING INTO A RESTAURANT.
88
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:15,423
BUT MEN CAN BALLOON UP
TO THE SIZE
OF A VOLKSWAGEN
89
00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:17,791
AND STILL GET DATES.
90
00:04:17,825 --> 00:04:18,626
WELL, THAT'S GREAT!
91
00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:22,129
OH, NOT YOU, DICK.
YOU'RE SLOPPY FAT.
92
00:04:22,162 --> 00:04:26,033
OH, ALL RIGHT, FINE.
SO WHAT IF I HAVE
PUT ON A LITTLE WEIGHT?
93
00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:29,370
BIG DEAL. I CAN LOSE IT.
I'M THE HIGH COMMANDER
OF THIS BODY.
94
00:04:29,403 --> 00:04:30,771
I'LL JUST ORDER IT
TO STOP EATING.
95
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:34,342
NO, DICK. IT'S
AN EARTH BODY, OK?
IT WON'T LISTEN TO YOU.
96
00:04:34,375 --> 00:04:37,678
FIRST THING WE NEED
IS A STRATEGY. LOOK WHAT
I WAS READING EARLIER TODAY.
97
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:40,881
"FARMER LOSES LEG
IN WOOD CHIPPER"?
98
00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:43,283
WELL, THAT'S GOTTA BE
10 POUNDS RIGHT THERE.
99
00:04:43,317 --> 00:04:46,654
NO. NOT THAT. THIS.
100
00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:50,958
"SUZANNE SOMERS REVEALS
HER SECRET SUMMER
SLIMMING TIPS."
101
00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:53,527
I WANT TO KNOW!
102
00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:09,643
SO, UM...
103
00:05:09,677 --> 00:05:11,512
HOW'S YOUR DIET
GOING, DR. SOLOMON?
104
00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:13,213
OH, IT'S NOT
JUST A DIET, NINA.
105
00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:15,716
IT'S A COMPLETE
LIFESTYLE CHANGE.
106
00:05:15,749 --> 00:05:17,250
SALLY JUST SIGNED ME UP
FOR A STEP CLASS.
107
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:20,320
I'M DRINKING
8 16-OUNCE GLASSES
OF WATER A DAY,
108
00:05:20,354 --> 00:05:22,956
AND I CAN EAT ALL
THE GRAPEFRUIT I LIKE.
109
00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:24,057
I SUPPOSE YOU
HAVE TO DIET
110
00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:27,661
WHEN YOU DON'T
HAVE THE WILLPOWER
TO SIMPLY EAT RIGHT.
111
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:32,032
MMM.
112
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:39,440
YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE
HOW DELICIOUS
THIS GRAPEFRUIT IS.
113
00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:41,742
Mary: MMM.
114
00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,517
WOULD EITHER OF YOU
LIKE A TASTE?
115
00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:51,785
NO, THANKS.
THAT'S
ALL RIGHT.
116
00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:53,954
CAN I TASTE YOURS?
117
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:58,859
TO BE IN THE SAME ROOM
WITH PIZZA, NINA AND I
CAN GO IN HER OFFICE.
118
00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:02,062
OH, NO, NO, NO.
THAT--THAT'S
NOT NECESSARY.
119
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:06,366
I'LL GIVE YOU
A WHOLE GRAPEFRUIT
FOR JUST ONE PEPPERONI!
120
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:07,267
LET'S GO.
121
00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,870
NO! UH...UH...
HOW ABOUT 2?
2 GRAPEFRUITS!
122
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:13,474
2 DELICIOUS GRAPEFRUITS!
123
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:15,843
AND MY WATCH!
124
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,813
HEY, YOU THIRSTY?
125
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:21,615
OH, I KNOW YOU.
126
00:06:21,649 --> 00:06:24,418
YOU WOULDN'T SAY
ANYTHING IF YOU WERE.
127
00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:27,455
THAT'S WHAT I LIKE
ABOUT YOU, YOU KNOW.
128
00:06:27,488 --> 00:06:31,124
YOU'RE NOT RUDE
OR DEMANDING LIKE
MOST PEOPLE I KNOW.
129
00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:33,661
YOU MUST BE BORED
OUT OF YOUR MIND.
130
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:35,162
NO. NOT AT ALL.
131
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:38,098
I WAS TALKING
TO THE PLANT.
132
00:06:41,301 --> 00:06:44,171
WELL, TOMMY, I'VE GOT
THE EVIDENCE RIGHT HERE.
133
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,506
WHUP!
134
00:06:45,539 --> 00:06:47,140
BUT I HAVE TO
WARN YOU, KID...
135
00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:49,977
YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE
WHAT YOU SEE.
136
00:06:52,946 --> 00:06:54,982
[GASPS]
137
00:06:55,015 --> 00:06:59,520
HARRY...
ALL THESE PICTURES
ARE OVEREXPOSED!
138
00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:02,623
WELL, I TOLD YOU
YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT.
139
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,593
WHAT WAS SHE DOING?
140
00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:08,462
"3:35...
141
00:07:08,496 --> 00:07:10,864
"SPOT AUGUST
TALKING TO FRIENDS.
142
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:13,634
"3:42. AUGUST
GETS ON BICYCLE.
143
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:14,935
"PURSUE ON FOOT.
144
00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:18,438
3:46. TRIP
OVER GARBAGE CAN."
145
00:07:18,472 --> 00:07:21,008
"3:46. FOLLOW AUGUST
TO THE LIBRARY,
146
00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:23,143
"WHERE
SHE STUDIES ALONE
UNTIL IT CLOSES...
147
00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:26,413
"AT 3:46.
148
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,548
"I THEN
FOLLOW HER HOME,
149
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:30,417
"WHERE SHE ARRIVES
AT EXACTLY...
150
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:33,621
3:46."
151
00:07:33,654 --> 00:07:35,022
HARRY,
WHAT TIME IS IT?
152
00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:37,257
3:46.
153
00:07:38,526 --> 00:07:40,828
WHERE DOES THE DAY GO?
154
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,197
Woman: AND UP!
AND STEP!
155
00:07:44,231 --> 00:07:46,133
AND UP!
AND STEP!
156
00:07:46,166 --> 00:07:48,301
AND UP!
AND STEP!
157
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,607
EYE OF THE TIGER, DICK!
158
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,343
IF I CAN DO IT,
YOU CAN DO IT!
159
00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:58,078
Woman: AND STEP!
AND UP!
160
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,113
AND STEP! AND DOWN!
161
00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:02,883
UP AND STEP
AND UP AND STEP!
162
00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:05,485
[PLOP]
163
00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:11,358
THAT'S AS FAR
AS IT'LL GO.
164
00:08:11,391 --> 00:08:13,994
OH, FIDDLE-DEE-DEE.
165
00:08:14,027 --> 00:08:16,897
I'VE GOTTA
GET BACK DOWN
TO A 32 WAIST.
166
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:20,367
OK! ON THE COUNT
OF 3, DEEP BREATH.
167
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:22,570
1, 2, 3.
168
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:26,173
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
169
00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:28,976
I'M BECOMING
THIN AGAIN.
170
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:30,443
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GONNA EXERCISE.
171
00:08:30,477 --> 00:08:32,546
SALLY! HELP HARRY!
WHAT?!
172
00:08:32,580 --> 00:08:33,647
WHAT IS THAT?
173
00:08:33,681 --> 00:08:35,048
IT'S CALLED
"THE SHATNER."
174
00:08:35,082 --> 00:08:37,785
NOW...NOW,
GO ON, PULL.
175
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:40,353
TOMMY! TOMMY!
PULL. PULL.
176
00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:43,891
1, 2, 3, GO!
ALL RIGHT.
GOT IT.
177
00:08:43,924 --> 00:08:45,659
THANK YOU,
LIEUTENANT.
178
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:48,061
OH--WHAT--NO.
DICK. DICK.
179
00:08:48,095 --> 00:08:49,897
DICK.
180
00:08:59,172 --> 00:09:01,308
DR. SOLOMON!
YOU LOOK GREAT!
181
00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:02,509
THANK YOU, NINA.
182
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,745
I FE GREAT.
183
00:09:24,632 --> 00:09:25,933
YOU DROPPED
YOUR CALCULATOR.
184
00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:28,368
NO, THAT'S
WHERE I KEEP IT.
185
00:09:29,036 --> 00:09:31,639
3 TIMES 4 EQUALS...
186
00:09:32,606 --> 00:09:35,375
12. JUST AS I THOUGHT.
187
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,911
HERE. LET ME
GET THAT FOR YOU.
188
00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:45,653
THANK YOU.
189
00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,187
[RIP]
190
00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:51,524
WHAT WAS THAT?
191
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:52,626
Mary: DICK?
192
00:09:52,660 --> 00:09:54,795
EXCUSE ME.
193
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:00,567
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
194
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:01,935
ALL RIGHT?
195
00:10:01,969 --> 00:10:04,004
I COULDN'T
BE BETTER.
196
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:09,943
[HISSING]
197
00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:19,352
Harry: OOH! OH!
198
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:26,159
HARRY?
199
00:10:26,193 --> 00:10:28,195
I'M NOT HARRY.
200
00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:32,165
UM...WHAT ARE YOU
DOING WITH THE CAMERA?
201
00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:34,167
WHAT CAMERA?
202
00:10:37,404 --> 00:10:40,874
PUT DOWN THE RIBS
AND STEP AWAY
FROM THE PLATTER.
203
00:10:42,776 --> 00:10:44,111
NO.
204
00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,113
OK, THEN. BUT
MAKE NO MISTAKE--
205
00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:47,647
IF YOU TAKE ONE BITE
OUT OF THAT,
206
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:50,017
YOU'RE GONNA
HATE YOURSELF MORE
THAN YOU ALREADY DO.
207
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:53,053
ARE YOU PREPARED TO FACE
THOSE CONSEQUENCES,
SOLDIER?!
208
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:56,223
URRHH!
209
00:10:57,390 --> 00:10:58,391
YOU'RE PATHETIC.
210
00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:01,394
OH, I KNOW! YOU KNOW,
NINA WAS RIGHT.
211
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:03,530
I | HAVE
A GAPING HOLE
INSIDE OF ME,
212
00:11:03,563 --> 00:11:05,966
BUT IT'S NOT MY FAULT!
IT'S THIS BODY!
213
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,068
IT HAS A STUPID
DESIGN FLAW.
214
00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:10,804
IT THINKS IT CAN FILL
AN EMOTIONAL VOID
WITH FOOD!
215
00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:13,006
GOD. COME ON, JEREMY.
216
00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:14,708
YOU NAMED IT
JEREMY?
217
00:11:14,742 --> 00:11:17,277
I WAS GONNA CALL
HIM LYCOPERSICON
ESCULENTUM,
218
00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:19,980
BUT IT SOUNDED
KINDA SNOTTY.
219
00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,214
COME ON,
HARRY.
220
00:11:21,248 --> 00:11:22,750
I SEE.
221
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:24,584
SO SUDDENLY
IT'S A CRIME
FOR A GROWN MAN
222
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:25,819
TO HANG AROUND
THE HIGH SCHOOL
223
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:28,155
TAKING PICTURES
OF THE YOUNG GIRLS.
224
00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:31,591
WHATCHA EATIN' THERE,
DICK?
225
00:11:31,624 --> 00:11:32,325
RIBS.
226
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:33,293
FAT FREE RIBS?
227
00:11:33,326 --> 00:11:34,995
OH, SHUT UP!
228
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:36,596
MY DIET IS DEAD.
229
00:11:36,629 --> 00:11:38,799
DIET HUH.
MUST BE ROUGH.
230
00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:42,335
LUCKY FOR ME,
I WAS BLESSED WITH
A HIGH METABOLISM.
231
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:44,738
THANKS FOR THE RIDE,
DON.
232
00:11:44,772 --> 00:11:46,406
HOLD IT THERE,
HARRY.
233
00:11:46,439 --> 00:11:48,976
I CAN ONLY RELEASE YOU
INTO THE CUSTODY
OF A FAMILY MEMBER.
234
00:11:49,009 --> 00:11:49,777
WELL, I'M
RIGHT HERE.
235
00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:51,211
NOT YOU.
WHERE'S SALLY?
236
00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:53,080
SHE'S IN THE OTHER ROOM.
237
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:53,914
IS SHE ALONE?
238
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,116
WELL, SHE'S WITH JEREMY.
239
00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:56,850
JEREMY.
240
00:11:56,884 --> 00:12:00,220
WELL...IT'S LIKE
SHE'S OBSESSED.
241
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:07,094
YOU GOT ANY MORE
HOT SAUCE?
242
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:09,930
CAN I HAVE A RIB?
243
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:12,199
NO!
NO!
244
00:12:32,485 --> 00:12:33,320
DR. SOLOMON--
245
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:35,422
NOT NOW.
I'M WORKING.
246
00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:36,723
OH, MY GOD!
247
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,658
WHAT IS ALL
THIS STUFF?
248
00:12:38,691 --> 00:12:40,828
IT'S NOT MINE! OH!
249
00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:42,796
IT'S THOSE
DAMNED RACCOONS!
250
00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:44,697
THEY HAVE LITTLE HANDS,
YOU KNOW.
251
00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:45,866
YOU'RE REALLY
WORRYING ME.
252
00:12:45,899 --> 00:12:48,335
OH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
253
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:50,737
LOOK AT YOURSELF.
254
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:53,240
NO!
LOOK AT YOURSELF.
255
00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:57,177
WHO AM I KIDDING?
256
00:12:57,210 --> 00:13:00,013
I'M HUGE!
257
00:13:00,047 --> 00:13:01,314
OH, NINA!
258
00:13:01,348 --> 00:13:03,083
I'M DOOMED--
259
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:06,386
DOOMED TO A LIFE
OF FORLORN PUDGERY.
260
00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:09,322
I'M GONNA BE REFERRED TO
AS "HUSKY" AND "JOLLY."
261
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,758
PEOPLE WILL NICKNAME ME
"TINY," AND THEY'LL LAUGH
262
00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:15,328
AND THROW ROTTEN FRUIT
AT MY REAR AS I PASS THEM
IN THE STREETS!
263
00:13:15,362 --> 00:13:16,729
NOBODY DOES THAT.
264
00:13:16,763 --> 00:13:18,698
WELL, I DO.
265
00:13:18,731 --> 00:13:20,433
OH, NINA, I NEED HELP!
266
00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:23,937
GOOD. DR, SOLOMON,
ADMITTING YOU NEED HELP
IS HALF THE BATTLE.
267
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:25,505
THE OTHER HALF
WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE
268
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:28,108
A CHERRY CHEESECAKE,
WOULD IT?
269
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,409
NO BOO,
IT'S NOT.
270
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:32,479
HUH. WELL,
IT SHOULD BE.
271
00:13:34,681 --> 00:13:37,817
TOMMY! THIS TIME
I'VE GOT GOOD NEWS.
272
00:13:37,851 --> 00:13:38,518
WHAT IS IT?
273
00:13:38,551 --> 00:13:40,453
AUGUST IS
CHEATING ON YOU.
274
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:44,557
DARRIN LASKEY.
275
00:13:44,591 --> 00:13:45,558
YEAH.
276
00:13:45,592 --> 00:13:46,994
HARRY, HOW IS THIS
GOOD NEWS?
277
00:13:47,027 --> 00:13:51,231
OH, WELL, LOOK
HOW HAPPY HE IS.
278
00:13:51,264 --> 00:13:52,332
WHAT'S THAT, DICK?
279
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:55,903
NINA SAYS I NEED
MORE STRUCTURE
AND SUPPORT,
280
00:13:55,936 --> 00:13:58,872
SO I--I JOINED
A WEIGHT-LOSS
PROGRAM--
281
00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:00,807
FAT-LOSERS.
282
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:04,577
"THE FAT-LOSERS
7-DAY DIET PLAN."
283
00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:06,079
WELL, NOW
WE'RE TALKING!
284
00:14:06,113 --> 00:14:07,847
BUT IT LOOKS SO HARD!
285
00:14:07,881 --> 00:14:09,282
OH, QUIT BEING
A BABY. THIS IS
286
00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:12,052
EXACTLY WHAT
YOU NEED, DICK--
SOME DISCIPLINE.
287
00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:13,786
OK. LET'S...
288
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:16,589
LET'S, UH, START
WITH THE BREAD
GROUP.
289
00:14:16,623 --> 00:14:18,391
HUH, YOU
CAN HAVE...
290
00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:20,693
HALF A REDUCED-CALORIE
BAGEL,
291
00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:25,065
OR YOU CAN EXCHANGE IT
FOR 6 SALTINES
AND A TORTILLA!
292
00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:27,100
AH. TONIGHT
YOU WILL BE HAVING
293
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:29,202
THE LO-CAL
SYMPHONY SALAD.
294
00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:32,672
ALL RIGHT. HERE,
GIVE ME YOUR TOMATO.
295
00:14:33,506 --> 00:14:36,944
WHAT, MY--MY TOMATO?
296
00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:39,879
UM...UH, MAYBE
WE'RE RUSHING THINGS
HERE, DICK.
297
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,849
I MEAN,
LOOK, WE'RE RACING
THROUGH A WHOLE WORLD
298
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,217
OF COTTAGE CHEESE
OPTIONS.
299
00:14:44,251 --> 00:14:46,653
NO. I'VE MADE MY DECISION.
NOW, GIVE ME YOUR TOMATO!
300
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:48,688
NO! DON'T MAKE ME
DO THIS, DICK!
I'LL TAKE THAT ONE.
301
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:52,059
JEREMY?!
YES, AND THOSE
2 LITTLE COWARDS
HIDING BEHIND HIM.
302
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:53,927
AAAHHH!
303
00:14:57,530 --> 00:15:00,067
HI. A NEW FACE.
HAVE YOU WEIGHED IN YET?
304
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:04,371
UH, YES. THAT
FAT-LOSER OVER THERE
HELPED ME.
305
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:08,875
THAT'S LILLY.
SHE'S BEEN A FAT-LOSER
FOR OVER 9 YEARS.
306
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,578
WELL, I SEE YOU HAVE
YOUR WATER BOTTLE
AND YOUR MENU PLANNER.
307
00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:12,545
HERE'S A FOOD SCALE.
308
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,548
OH. IT'S OFFICIAL.
I'M A FAT-LOSER.
309
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:16,916
CONGRATULATIONS.
310
00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:19,486
OK, COULD EVERYBODY
PLEASE TAKE A SEAT?
311
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:22,255
I'VE GOT A LOT
OF GOOD NEWS HERE
TODAY, PEOPLE.
312
00:15:22,289 --> 00:15:26,159
JOE McBRIDE...
2 POUNDS!
313
00:15:26,193 --> 00:15:28,328
AND HE SPENT
THE WEEKEND
IN NEW ORLEANS!
314
00:15:28,361 --> 00:15:31,031
GOD, I LOVE
THAT CRAWFISH.
315
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:33,600
STEPHANIE HAYES,
4 WHOLE POUNDS.
316
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:36,169
YEAH, YOU HEARD ME.
4 POUNDS.
317
00:15:36,203 --> 00:15:39,472
NOW, HERE'S
SOMEONE WHO IS FINALLY
HOLDING HER GROUND...
318
00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:43,243
NO LOSS, BUT NO GAIN--
MARY ALBRIGHT.
319
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,682
MARY?
320
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:51,051
DICK!
321
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,752
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
YOU'D BEEN COMING HERE?
322
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:53,953
IT'S NONE
OF YOUR BUSINESS.
323
00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:54,921
BUT IT'S YOUR BUSINESS
324
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,823
TO STAND BY AND WATCH
ME SUFFER ALONE
325
00:15:56,856 --> 00:16:01,328
WHILE YOU SECRETLY FIND
HELP IN THE PILLOWY BOSOM
OF THIS SUPPORT GROUP!
326
00:16:01,361 --> 00:16:05,698
LET'S HEAR FROM OUR
NEWEST FAT-LOSER.
327
00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:09,202
HELLO. MY NAME IS DICK,
AND I'M A FAT-LOSER.
328
00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:09,802
SIT DOWN!
329
00:16:09,836 --> 00:16:12,505
NO. I HAVE
A LOT TO SAY.
330
00:16:12,539 --> 00:16:15,508
BUT I DON'T WANT
TO BORE YOU ALL
WITH WHY I'M HERE.
331
00:16:15,542 --> 00:16:18,078
I WANT TO TELL YOU
WHY MARY ALBRIGHT
IS HERE.
332
00:16:18,111 --> 00:16:18,778
DICK!
333
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,280
YOU SEE, WE WERE
LOVERS ONCE...
334
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:23,050
BUT THAT'S
ALL OVER NOW.
335
00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:26,053
AND SHE PRETENDS
THAT SHE'S OK WITH IT,
BUT SHE'S NOT.
336
00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:29,422
AND SO SHE'S BEEN
TRYING TO REPLACE ME
WITH OTHER MEN...
337
00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:31,691
MEN LIKE OSCAR MEYER...
338
00:16:32,059 --> 00:16:33,593
BEN & JERRY...
339
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:36,296
AND THE PILLSBURY
DOUGHBOY!
340
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,331
DICK, PLEASE.
341
00:16:39,899 --> 00:16:41,568
AUGUST.
342
00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:43,770
ARE YOU
CHEATING ON ME?
WHAT?
343
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:46,606
HARRY SAW YOU
KISSING DARRIN LASKEY.
344
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:49,509
DARRIN LASKEY.
HE'S IN MY DRAMA CLASS.
345
00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:51,144
WE WERE DOING
A SCENE TOGETHER.
346
00:16:51,178 --> 00:16:54,181
OH. OH, MY GOD.
I MUST LOOK
LIKE SUCH AN IDIOT.
347
00:16:54,214 --> 00:16:57,750
YOU WERE DOING A SCENE?
WHAT A FOOL I AM.
THAT HARRY, HE'S--
348
00:16:57,784 --> 00:16:59,119
HEY, AUGUST.
349
00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:03,056
AND KEVIN DOUGLAS.
YOU MUST BE
IN DRAMA CLASS, TOO.
350
00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:05,258
SO YOU'RE QUITE
A LITTLE ACTRESS
THERE, AUGUST.
351
00:17:05,292 --> 00:17:06,959
SO YOU TWO ARE JUST
REHEARSING AWAY.
352
00:17:06,993 --> 00:17:08,361
IT'S
VERY CONVINCING.
353
00:17:08,395 --> 00:17:11,131
I'D--I'D PAY TO SEE
SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
354
00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:13,433
SO, NOW, TELL ME,
KEVIN, SO YOU'RE,
UH...YOU'RE, UH...
355
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:20,340
YOU'RE...KISSING...
YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND,
AREN'T YOU?
356
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,309
CAN YOU GIVE ME
A MINUTE?
357
00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:23,843
RIGHT.
358
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:28,448
AUGUST, HOW COULD YOU
DO THIS TO ME?
359
00:17:28,481 --> 00:17:31,618
DO THIS TO YOU?
WHAT KIND OF
BOYFRIEND ARE YOU?
360
00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,853
YOU--YOU LUST
AFTER OUR MUSIC TEACHER.
361
00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:35,455
YOU FLIRT WITH
THAT SLEAZY LORNA.
362
00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:40,093
OK, BUT IN ALL FAIRNESS,
THEY BOTH TOTALLY
BLEW ME OFF.
363
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:48,868
MARY.
364
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:51,304
DON'T TALK TO ME.
365
00:17:51,338 --> 00:17:55,275
YOU LOST THE RIGHT
TO EMBARRASS ME IN PUBLIC
WHEN WE STOPPED DATING.
366
00:17:55,308 --> 00:17:57,144
I FORGIVE YOU, MARY.
367
00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:59,045
YOU'RE FORGIVING ME?
368
00:17:59,078 --> 00:17:59,946
FOR WHAT?
369
00:17:59,979 --> 00:18:01,548
FOR HOW
YOU DECEIVED ME...
370
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:04,517
HOW YOU LED ME TO BELIEVE
YOU WERE UNAFFECTED
BY OUR BREAKUP,
371
00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:08,155
WHEN IN FACT, YOU WERE
A HUNGRY, FRIGHTENED
LITTLE BALLERINA
372
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:12,125
CAREENING OUT OF CONTROL
AT 80 MILES AN HOUR.
373
00:18:12,159 --> 00:18:14,161
FOR YOUR INFORMATION,
374
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:16,729
MY EATING HAD NOTHING
TO DO WITH YOU.
375
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,865
THAT'S WHAT YOU'D LIKE
ME TO THINK, ISN'T IT?
376
00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:21,234
I DON'T CARE
WHAT YOU THINK.
YOU DO, TOO.
377
00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:22,435
I DO NOT.
DO, TOO.
378
00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:23,703
DO NOT.
TOO!
NOT!
379
00:18:23,736 --> 00:18:24,804
WHY DON'T YOU JUST ADMIT
380
00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,406
THAT YOU'VE BEEN EATING
BECAUSE YOU MISSED ME?
381
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:27,407
WHY DON'T YOU JUST ADMIT
382
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:28,875
THAT YOU'VE BEEN EATING
BECAUSE YOU MISSED ME?!
383
00:18:28,908 --> 00:18:29,709
BECAUSE
I DON'T MISS YOU!
384
00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:33,346
WELL, I DON'T
MISS YOU, EITHER!
385
00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:34,581
ARE YOU AS HUNGRY
AS I AM?
386
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:35,182
MORE.
387
00:18:35,215 --> 00:18:37,016
OH...
388
00:18:50,096 --> 00:18:51,798
HELLO,
SALLY.
389
00:18:51,831 --> 00:18:52,799
HELLO, DON.
390
00:18:54,701 --> 00:18:58,405
HOW ARE THINGS GOING
WITH...JEREMY?
391
00:18:58,438 --> 00:19:00,407
JEREMY'S DEAD!
392
00:19:00,673 --> 00:19:02,041
THAT'S TERRIBLE!
393
00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:02,975
I'M SO SORRY.
394
00:19:03,009 --> 00:19:04,611
OH!
395
00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:12,319
MY PANTS FIT!
I WON THE WAR!
396
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:15,655
THAT'S GREAT,
DICK.
397
00:19:16,323 --> 00:19:17,624
SO YOU LOST WEIGHT?
398
00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:20,527
EVEN BETTER.
I BOUGHT BIGGER PANTS.
399
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:23,830
GOOD THINKING,
TINY.
400
00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:25,732
WHY ARE YOU
EATING LIKE THAT?
401
00:19:25,765 --> 00:19:28,935
[INCOMPREHENSIBLE]
402
00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:31,838
I'M SORRY
TO HEAR IT.
403
00:19:31,871 --> 00:19:34,341
WELL, DICK,
YOUR SALAD'S READY.
I HOPE YOU LIKE IT.
404
00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:36,909
SALAD?
LITTLE GUYS NEVER
KNEW WHAT HIT 'EM.
405
00:19:36,943 --> 00:19:39,246
WHO WANTS SALAD?
I WANT SOME REAL FOOD!
406
00:19:39,279 --> 00:19:41,781
I CANNOT BELIEVE
HOW INSENSITIVE
407
00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:43,015
YOU AR--
SHH! LISTEN!
408
00:19:43,049 --> 00:19:44,517
[MR. FROSTY SMOOTH
MUSIC PLAYS]
409
00:19:44,551 --> 00:19:47,220
MR. FROSTY SMOOTH!
MR. FROSTY SMOOTH!
410
00:19:47,254 --> 00:19:50,189
HE'S RIGHT ON TIME!
411
00:19:50,223 --> 00:19:53,226
3:46 ON THE DOT.
412
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:01,468
Harry: IT WAS THE END
OF A LONG DAY,
413
00:20:01,501 --> 00:20:04,437
AND ALL I WANTED TO DO
WAS SIT BACK, HAVE A DRINK,
414
00:20:04,471 --> 00:20:07,006
AND THINK
ABOUT LOVE'S FURY.
415
00:20:08,875 --> 00:20:12,245
I KNEW THE DAME WAS TROUBLE
THE MINUTE SHE WALKED
IN THE DOOR.
416
00:20:12,279 --> 00:20:14,113
DID YOU DRINK
ALL THE MILK AGAIN,
YOU IDIOT?!
417
00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:16,416
GO BACK TO BED!
418
00:20:16,449 --> 00:20:20,487
MY GUT TOLD ME THINGS
WERE ABOUT TO GO
FROM BAD TO WORSE.
419
00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:27,126
I HATE IT WHEN I'M RIGHT.
29358
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