Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,150 --> 00:00:00,983
- Hello!
2
00:00:00,983 --> 00:00:02,503
It's me, Kimia Behpoornia.
3
00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:03,900
I don't know what's gonna happen today,
4
00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:06,117
but I'm here with Jacob
Wysocki, so it's gonna be good.
5
00:00:06,117 --> 00:00:07,233
- Wazzup!
6
00:00:07,233 --> 00:00:08,880
(upbeat music)
7
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:10,830
- [Vic] Today we are
giving these comedians
8
00:00:10,830 --> 00:00:12,900
a total transformation.
9
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:16,650
They have no idea who or
what they're about to become.
10
00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:18,030
- What are you doing over here?
11
00:00:18,030 --> 00:00:19,980
- [Vic] Once they see
themselves in the mirror,
12
00:00:19,980 --> 00:00:22,800
they'll have to make up
a character, on the spot,
13
00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:26,719
and then sit down with me
for an improvised interview.
14
00:00:26,719 --> 00:00:27,690
(inaudible)
15
00:00:27,690 --> 00:00:30,657
This is "Very Important People".
16
00:00:32,130 --> 00:00:33,570
- You gotta be loving this at home.
17
00:00:33,570 --> 00:00:37,080
You know what I look like,
but I don't. Must be nice.
18
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:37,913
Hey, Kimia?
19
00:00:37,913 --> 00:00:38,746
- [Kimia] Yeah?
20
00:00:38,746 --> 00:00:39,660
- No matter what happens?
21
00:00:39,660 --> 00:00:40,493
- [Kimia] Yeah?
22
00:00:40,493 --> 00:00:41,490
- We're always gonna be friends.
23
00:00:41,490 --> 00:00:42,600
- [Kimia] Absolutely, man.
24
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- [Director] Three, two, one!
25
00:00:45,584 --> 00:00:47,806
- Oh boy!
(laughs)
26
00:00:47,806 --> 00:00:49,537
Wow!
- Oh!
27
00:00:49,537 --> 00:00:50,833
- Look at you.
- Okay.
28
00:00:50,833 --> 00:00:52,084
- Those are some good-
- Very cool.
29
00:00:52,084 --> 00:00:53,221
- Shoes.
30
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Oh, whoa!
- Oh no!
31
00:00:55,979 --> 00:00:58,747
- Oh boy! That's what's in there.
32
00:00:58,747 --> 00:01:00,630
(both laughing)
33
00:01:00,630 --> 00:01:03,030
- It's so different than every aspect
34
00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:04,560
that I had imagined and clocked.
35
00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:07,890
I do feel shnaz! I didn't do the 360.
36
00:01:07,890 --> 00:01:09,090
Oh, we both have our little-
37
00:01:09,090 --> 00:01:09,923
- Oh, a little-!
38
00:01:09,923 --> 00:01:11,130
- Love will save you!
- We must-
39
00:01:11,130 --> 00:01:12,383
Oh my God!
- Step right up,
40
00:01:12,383 --> 00:01:13,499
step right up!
41
00:01:13,499 --> 00:01:15,720
- You gonna see the weirdest
things you ever seen!
42
00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:18,030
- We got a guy who swallows beards!
43
00:01:18,030 --> 00:01:20,445
- I don't think it- (laughing)
- Okay, all right.
44
00:01:20,445 --> 00:01:21,810
(vocalizing)
45
00:01:21,810 --> 00:01:23,370
- [Both] No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
46
00:01:23,370 --> 00:01:24,600
- Time travelers?
47
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:25,867
- Yeah, 'cause, like what?
48
00:01:25,867 --> 00:01:26,700
We're, like, the richest people ever.
49
00:01:26,700 --> 00:01:28,470
We afforded time travel back in the day.
50
00:01:28,470 --> 00:01:29,303
- Absolutely.
51
00:01:29,303 --> 00:01:31,677
Would you like us to add
another zero to the check?
52
00:01:31,677 --> 00:01:33,210
- Ah, yeah, no one's gonna know
53
00:01:33,210 --> 00:01:35,190
who we is when we pop in there, man.
54
00:01:35,190 --> 00:01:37,900
- Who's these twos?
- Who's these two stumps?
55
00:01:37,900 --> 00:01:39,121
- Never seen these twos before.
- Ain't never seen
56
00:01:39,121 --> 00:01:40,463
these two dumps before.
57
00:01:40,463 --> 00:01:41,970
- Wallet in my pantaloons-
- That's right, that's right.
58
00:01:41,970 --> 00:01:43,470
- Rolex on my wrist.
59
00:01:43,470 --> 00:01:45,840
What year did you die?
60
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:47,888
- Oh crap, I'm dead?
61
00:01:47,888 --> 00:01:50,316
- High-five!
(wooshing)
62
00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:54,932
- Oh these? Oh, these guys in here?
63
00:01:54,932 --> 00:01:56,790
Tomas and Jacques.
64
00:01:56,790 --> 00:02:00,208
- They have the power to
fly, but they stick with us.
65
00:02:00,208 --> 00:02:04,158
(upbeat, funky music)
66
00:02:16,250 --> 00:02:17,850
- We all have a story to tell.
67
00:02:17,850 --> 00:02:20,820
And sometimes that story needs
to be shared with the world.
68
00:02:20,820 --> 00:02:23,370
Good evening, I'm Vic Michaelis
here with another edition
69
00:02:23,370 --> 00:02:26,667
of "Very Important People".
70
00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:29,490
Please introduce yourselves.
71
00:02:29,490 --> 00:02:31,976
- Hello, I'm Zonton de la Doll.
72
00:02:31,976 --> 00:02:34,586
- Bonsoir, Marionette Conqui!
73
00:02:34,586 --> 00:02:37,253
(tense music)
74
00:02:38,890 --> 00:02:42,565
- Okay, so I'm gonna ask one
more time. What was your name?
75
00:02:42,565 --> 00:02:44,300
- Zonton.
- Zonton?
76
00:02:44,300 --> 00:02:46,000
- Zonton!
- Zonton, okay-
77
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:47,820
- De la Doll.
- Zonton de la Doll?
78
00:02:47,820 --> 00:02:49,710
- Oui.
- You better remember that
79
00:02:49,710 --> 00:02:52,140
because he is having a
hard time remembering.
80
00:02:52,140 --> 00:02:53,180
- What was your name again?
81
00:02:53,180 --> 00:02:54,444
- Marionette Conqui!
82
00:02:54,444 --> 00:02:55,907
- Marionette Conqui.
- Marionette Conqui.
83
00:02:55,907 --> 00:02:57,418
- Well, thank you two
so much for being here-
84
00:02:57,418 --> 00:02:58,461
- Help her remember!
85
00:02:58,461 --> 00:02:59,294
- I'm sorry?
86
00:02:59,294 --> 00:03:00,476
- Help her remember.
- You better remember.
87
00:03:00,476 --> 00:03:01,642
- I better remember?
88
00:03:01,642 --> 00:03:03,120
- She needs help to remember.
89
00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:04,498
- See, you know what
would be helpful right now
90
00:03:04,498 --> 00:03:07,493
is some live subtitles,
right? (laughs nervously)
91
00:03:08,385 --> 00:03:09,420
- What?
- So you two traveled
92
00:03:09,420 --> 00:03:11,332
quite far to be here
today, is that correct?
93
00:03:11,332 --> 00:03:12,165
- [Both] Oui.
94
00:03:12,165 --> 00:03:13,590
Where are you coming from?
95
00:03:13,590 --> 00:03:15,090
- The south of France.
96
00:03:15,090 --> 00:03:16,890
- Well, I guess I probably
should have guessed that
97
00:03:16,890 --> 00:03:18,175
from the accents, right?
98
00:03:18,175 --> 00:03:21,300
- Hey, you would not know what
region of France we are from
99
00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:24,750
unless you do know the
accents from different regions
100
00:03:24,750 --> 00:03:27,060
because this is very specific.
101
00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:28,546
- Is there a difference
between the northern-?
102
00:03:28,546 --> 00:03:30,070
- [Both] Is there a difference?
103
00:03:30,070 --> 00:03:32,748
(both laughing)
104
00:03:32,748 --> 00:03:34,490
- Absolutely there is.
105
00:03:34,490 --> 00:03:36,838
In the north, they sound like this:
106
00:03:36,838 --> 00:03:39,397
"Hello, we are from France!"
107
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- (high-pitched) Bonsoir, bonjour.
108
00:03:42,420 --> 00:03:44,130
- I see, and then do yours one more time.
109
00:03:44,130 --> 00:03:46,123
- We are from the south.
- This is the south
110
00:03:46,123 --> 00:03:47,310
of France.
- So it's a pitch thing,
111
00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:48,420
mostly.
- Yes.
112
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You are picking up very fast!
- You get it.
113
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:51,960
- Well, thank you. I appreciate that.
114
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:55,273
So you've come all the way
to Los Angeles, California.
115
00:03:55,273 --> 00:03:56,106
- Yes.
116
00:03:56,106 --> 00:03:57,527
- How was the travel? I have to ask.
117
00:03:57,527 --> 00:03:59,517
- We shared one seat!
- Lap sitting?
118
00:03:59,517 --> 00:04:00,553
(affirmative French grunting)
I see.
119
00:04:00,553 --> 00:04:03,390
- We are used to being next
to each other, so close.
120
00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:05,010
- Well, and I'd love to dig
into that a little bit more.
121
00:04:05,010 --> 00:04:06,610
You're used to being next to each other?
122
00:04:06,610 --> 00:04:07,751
- Correct!
- What do you mean by that?
123
00:04:07,751 --> 00:04:10,538
- We spent most of our
lives on a shelf together.
124
00:04:10,538 --> 00:04:12,480
- And why is that?
125
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:14,677
- Well, can't you tell?
126
00:04:14,677 --> 00:04:15,510
- You're French?
127
00:04:15,510 --> 00:04:17,127
- And we used to be-
128
00:04:18,390 --> 00:04:19,650
- [All] Dolls.
129
00:04:19,650 --> 00:04:20,483
- I see.
130
00:04:20,483 --> 00:04:22,560
I was gonna say that and
then I thought maybe it
131
00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:23,970
would be inappropriate to point that out,
132
00:04:23,970 --> 00:04:25,728
so I appreciate you bringing it up.
133
00:04:25,728 --> 00:04:27,000
- It is best to let us lead the way
134
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,798
in that sort of discussion.
- That's good.
135
00:04:28,798 --> 00:04:32,850
You do the listening and we
tell you and then you learn.
136
00:04:32,850 --> 00:04:35,070
Though, do not make us educate you.
137
00:04:35,070 --> 00:04:36,629
Do you know what I'll say?
- I-
138
00:04:36,629 --> 00:04:39,036
- There's a very thin line of, like,
139
00:04:39,036 --> 00:04:40,184
you should know,
140
00:04:40,184 --> 00:04:41,550
and I shouldn't have to tell you,
141
00:04:41,550 --> 00:04:43,820
but you can ask some
questions if you're, like,
142
00:04:43,820 --> 00:04:45,073
genuinely curious.
- That's right,
143
00:04:45,073 --> 00:04:46,920
but you do research on your own
144
00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:49,320
and then so you bring that to our table
145
00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:50,280
and then we go together-
- Well, speaking
146
00:04:50,280 --> 00:04:52,020
of doing research on
my own, I know you two
147
00:04:52,020 --> 00:04:53,490
had quite an arduous journey to get here.
148
00:04:53,490 --> 00:04:56,130
Obviously the plane, but
there was a lot more involved
149
00:04:56,130 --> 00:04:57,540
in that. A train, at one point.
150
00:04:57,540 --> 00:04:59,550
- Planes, trains.
151
00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:01,318
- Automobile.
152
00:05:01,318 --> 00:05:03,675
- Lakes.
- A lake.
153
00:05:03,675 --> 00:05:06,060
- Rivers.
- Plateaus.
154
00:05:06,060 --> 00:05:07,980
- Tributaries.
- Bridges.
155
00:05:07,980 --> 00:05:11,070
- Springs.
- Railways, toll roads.
156
00:05:11,070 --> 00:05:14,160
- One of those scooters
when you break your knee
157
00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:16,890
and you scoot around with one good leg.
158
00:05:16,890 --> 00:05:18,750
- We took that from a man.
159
00:05:18,750 --> 00:05:21,270
- So we sort of took a series
of modes of transportation
160
00:05:21,270 --> 00:05:23,280
and then also we took a series of,
161
00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:26,113
it sounds like geographic features.
162
00:05:26,113 --> 00:05:28,440
But nonetheless, we're so
happy to have you here today.
163
00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:30,663
And why Los Angeles?
164
00:05:32,460 --> 00:05:35,910
- That is where we
thought we could find Her.
165
00:05:35,910 --> 00:05:37,313
- Where you thought you could find her?
166
00:05:37,313 --> 00:05:38,605
- Her.
- Who is Her?
167
00:05:38,605 --> 00:05:39,960
- The one.
- Who is the one?
168
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:41,040
- The boss woman.
169
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,470
- Who is the boss woman?
- She walks around the house
170
00:05:43,470 --> 00:05:44,940
while we sit on the shelf.
171
00:05:44,940 --> 00:05:46,758
- Why does she walk around the house?
172
00:05:46,758 --> 00:05:47,993
- She is the boss woman.
173
00:05:47,993 --> 00:05:49,051
- Why is she the boss?
174
00:05:49,051 --> 00:05:49,884
- She made us.
175
00:05:49,884 --> 00:05:50,717
- She made you.
176
00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:51,780
- Our creator.
177
00:05:51,780 --> 00:05:52,950
- I understand.
178
00:05:52,950 --> 00:05:54,210
- We must find her.
179
00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:56,730
- So you were sort of left in France
180
00:05:56,730 --> 00:05:57,960
and your creator disappeared
181
00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:00,005
and you're here searching for her today?
182
00:06:00,005 --> 00:06:01,371
- [Both] Oui.
183
00:06:01,371 --> 00:06:03,750
- If I might ask the
question on everybody's mind,
184
00:06:03,750 --> 00:06:04,760
did we find Her?
185
00:06:05,769 --> 00:06:08,769
(suspenseful music)
186
00:06:11,492 --> 00:06:12,385
- Oh, feel good.
187
00:06:17,940 --> 00:06:21,683
- No, no, we didn't find her.
Well, we did find something.
188
00:06:21,683 --> 00:06:22,791
(both gasping)
189
00:06:22,791 --> 00:06:24,540
- She's here?
- And that is a series
190
00:06:24,540 --> 00:06:25,983
of your accessories.
191
00:06:27,900 --> 00:06:30,570
I don't know why I lead it
in like that and I apologize.
192
00:06:30,570 --> 00:06:33,895
But we do have a series of
your accessories that we found
193
00:06:33,895 --> 00:06:36,000
and we have hidden them around the set.
194
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,500
So we thought it'd be a fun little game
195
00:06:37,500 --> 00:06:40,173
if you two find your accessories.
196
00:06:42,180 --> 00:06:44,430
- That was such a cruel trick.
197
00:06:44,430 --> 00:06:47,130
- And I realized that when I
said it and I do apologize.
198
00:06:47,130 --> 00:06:48,660
We have taken two of your things
199
00:06:48,660 --> 00:06:50,160
and hidden them around the set.
200
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:51,750
- Ah, just two things.
- Okay, just two,
201
00:06:51,750 --> 00:06:52,830
not too much.
202
00:06:52,830 --> 00:06:55,560
- It's a sort of a segment
the producers pitched.
203
00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:57,510
- Oh, is this a prop?
204
00:06:57,510 --> 00:06:58,740
- Do you recognize that?
205
00:06:58,740 --> 00:07:02,046
- Yes, absolutely.
- Oh, please play me the song.
206
00:07:02,046 --> 00:07:05,296
(imitating trumpet)
207
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,130
- Absolutely beautiful.
208
00:07:11,130 --> 00:07:14,100
We do have one more prop
hidden around the set here.
209
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,490
- Okay, it's hidden?
It's not this big canine?
210
00:07:17,490 --> 00:07:18,840
- [Vic] No, that canine is mine.
211
00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:20,670
- Maybe it is the batteries
212
00:07:20,670 --> 00:07:22,650
in the small clock?
- It's not the batteries.
213
00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:25,590
That's mine actually and
that's sort of a heirloom,
214
00:07:25,590 --> 00:07:27,017
so we're gonna put that down.
- Is it here?
215
00:07:27,017 --> 00:07:28,911
- [Vic] Well, how about you take a seat
216
00:07:28,911 --> 00:07:29,880
and maybe I will find your prop for you.
217
00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:31,053
- Thank you so much.
218
00:07:32,338 --> 00:07:34,674
- Oh, look what we found!
- Oh boy, oh good!
219
00:07:34,674 --> 00:07:37,015
- Oh! My old lyre.
220
00:07:38,962 --> 00:07:40,920
(lyre strums)
221
00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:42,870
- Oh, that's pretty good, actually.
222
00:07:42,870 --> 00:07:45,287
(vocalizing)
223
00:07:49,192 --> 00:07:53,186
(vocalizing continues)
224
00:07:53,186 --> 00:07:54,210
(trumpet-adjacent noise)
225
00:07:54,210 --> 00:07:56,086
Sort of Jason Mraz-y.
226
00:07:56,086 --> 00:07:57,903
- Mraz-y, that's a French name.
227
00:07:57,903 --> 00:07:59,640
- Jason Mraz!
- Is that a French name?
228
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:00,960
- Where did you find this?
229
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:02,670
- A little birdie sent them to us.
230
00:08:02,670 --> 00:08:04,320
It wasn't the ones in your hair,
231
00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:07,140
but that is a wonderful point to make.
232
00:08:07,140 --> 00:08:09,510
Alright, so, I'm learning a
lot about doll culture here
233
00:08:09,510 --> 00:08:11,760
and I appreciate you two taking the time
234
00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:12,690
to come and introduce this.
235
00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:15,584
So you did just flip instruments here.
236
00:08:15,584 --> 00:08:18,659
(actual trumpet blows)
237
00:08:20,130 --> 00:08:21,540
You are a very talented doll.
238
00:08:21,540 --> 00:08:24,390
- Thank you so much. I can
do more than one thing!
239
00:08:24,390 --> 00:08:25,803
- Not me, just the one.
240
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:27,630
- Just the one? I understand.
241
00:08:27,630 --> 00:08:32,630
So going from being so small
to now being human size,
242
00:08:32,850 --> 00:08:34,380
are you finding the adjustment difficult?
243
00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:36,390
- It is a good question.
- Oh, it is good question
244
00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:37,595
because it is a lot.
245
00:08:37,595 --> 00:08:39,810
We are walking around and
then everybody look at us,
246
00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:41,297
they go like this.
247
00:08:41,297 --> 00:08:43,290
- Sometimes they go like this.
248
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:45,000
- Or they go like this.
249
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,883
- The one that hurts me the most, they go,
250
00:08:47,887 --> 00:08:49,650
"Huh, strange."
251
00:08:49,650 --> 00:08:52,567
- Then this one is weird,
for only to me, they go,
252
00:08:52,567 --> 00:08:55,470
"Hey lady, hey lady!"
253
00:08:55,470 --> 00:08:56,970
What is this?
- Isn't that so strange?
254
00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:58,980
- Humans have been quite
judgmental towards you two
255
00:08:58,980 --> 00:09:00,660
is what I'm hearing.
- Mhmm.
256
00:09:00,660 --> 00:09:01,860
- And how does that feel?
257
00:09:01,860 --> 00:09:05,506
- That is not how Her treats people.
258
00:09:05,506 --> 00:09:09,060
- Her treats people perfectly.
- Perfect.
259
00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:12,600
- What are some things you
used to like to do with Her?
260
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:16,230
- Sometimes I remember my little arms
261
00:09:16,230 --> 00:09:18,390
being out and spinning.
262
00:09:18,390 --> 00:09:20,460
- Oh!
- So fast and the giggles
263
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:24,593
and I could hardly see anything. (laughs)
264
00:09:24,593 --> 00:09:26,670
- That was good and sometimes, you know,
265
00:09:26,670 --> 00:09:29,850
she put me in the bed and
put my head on the pillow
266
00:09:29,850 --> 00:09:33,300
like I am big human, like I am now.
267
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:37,524
And she would go, "Goodnight,
Marionette Conqui!
268
00:09:37,524 --> 00:09:40,520
Je t'aime!"
- Je t'aime.
269
00:09:40,520 --> 00:09:41,970
- So it seems like something
has brought you to life.
270
00:09:41,970 --> 00:09:45,299
Do you have any idea
how you ended up here?
271
00:09:45,299 --> 00:09:46,740
- No.
- No, no.
272
00:09:46,740 --> 00:09:47,670
- We wish we did.
273
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:49,857
- That would solve a
lot of problems for us.
274
00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:53,040
- Now what is the last
thing you remember as dolls?
275
00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:55,710
- There was a storm
outside and a lightning.
276
00:09:55,710 --> 00:09:58,560
- And it struck exactly
the top of our home.
277
00:09:58,560 --> 00:10:00,300
- At midnight.
278
00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:02,730
- And then everything changed.
279
00:10:02,730 --> 00:10:06,950
- I see. So did you make a
wish, something like that?
280
00:10:06,950 --> 00:10:09,210
- Did you?
- Did you make a wish?
281
00:10:09,210 --> 00:10:11,556
- I'm trying to think.
- Did I make a wish?
282
00:10:11,556 --> 00:10:12,690
- This feels so long ago, but it's really
283
00:10:12,690 --> 00:10:14,310
just a couple of weeks-
- It does- What's happened,
284
00:10:14,310 --> 00:10:15,717
a couple weeks?
- There's so many things.
285
00:10:15,717 --> 00:10:17,866
- Sort of days.
- I think maybe I said,
286
00:10:17,866 --> 00:10:19,470
"If I could be big and see Her again..."
287
00:10:19,470 --> 00:10:20,978
- That's right, it was a shk, shk,
288
00:10:20,978 --> 00:10:22,453
and I was like, "Oh!"
- What were the exact words
289
00:10:22,453 --> 00:10:23,286
you said?
290
00:10:23,286 --> 00:10:27,630
- The exact words I said
was, "I want to be human".
291
00:10:27,630 --> 00:10:29,160
- Mm, I said the same thing!
292
00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:30,067
- You said it?
- I said,
293
00:10:30,067 --> 00:10:33,210
"I want to be human."
294
00:10:33,210 --> 00:10:35,880
- So when I asked about
sort of a specific wish
295
00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:37,680
or instance, I think
maybe something like that
296
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,750
was what I would be referring to there.
297
00:10:39,750 --> 00:10:42,540
Incredible.
- You found it!
298
00:10:42,540 --> 00:10:44,160
- Thank you for saying that.
- You have a gift!
299
00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:45,930
- Oh, no, I-
- You got that out of us.
300
00:10:45,930 --> 00:10:48,120
- Tell that to MSNBC.
They don't want me, so-
301
00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:49,080
- Who is this?
302
00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:53,040
- Well, it's a news-
- MSNBC, I'll kill you!
303
00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,420
- Okay, don't say that.
304
00:10:54,420 --> 00:10:56,670
Because I am still, I mean, this is great.
305
00:10:56,670 --> 00:11:00,480
- Every person on N-M-N-N-S-N-M-S-N-B-C?
306
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:01,620
- Yeah, no.
307
00:11:01,620 --> 00:11:02,610
- The guillotine!
308
00:11:02,610 --> 00:11:04,560
- We're not threatening anybody at MS,
309
00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,720
this is not a threat to anybody at MSNBC.
310
00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:08,250
- It is!
- No, it's not!
311
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,290
- Unfortunately, I've
never been more serious.
312
00:11:10,290 --> 00:11:13,710
- Now you two have taken
the media by storm.
313
00:11:13,710 --> 00:11:16,140
I don't know if you know
this. There's a hashtag-
314
00:11:16,140 --> 00:11:17,370
- There was a storm?
315
00:11:17,370 --> 00:11:19,560
- Not a literal-
- How bad, how much rain?
316
00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:21,360
- Do I need to take cover?
- No, it's, so,
317
00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,960
a media storm is a sort of
when you set the media on fire!
318
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:26,289
- Now there's a fire?
- Not a fire!
319
00:11:26,289 --> 00:11:28,002
- No, there's not a fire-
- [Both] Fire, fire!
320
00:11:28,002 --> 00:11:28,977
- It's not a fire, it's not a fire!
321
00:11:28,977 --> 00:11:30,898
Sit, nope. Stop, no.
322
00:11:30,898 --> 00:11:33,192
It's a sort of an influx
323
00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:36,990
a sudden great gust of posts.
324
00:11:36,990 --> 00:11:40,290
- There are so many fence
posts coming for us.
325
00:11:40,290 --> 00:11:43,650
- So many, many people have used a hashtag
326
00:11:43,650 --> 00:11:46,770
to document your trip from
France to Los Angeles.
327
00:11:46,770 --> 00:11:48,510
And if we can actually pull that up here,
328
00:11:48,510 --> 00:11:51,060
it is "Homeward Bound"
but with dolls this time.
329
00:11:51,060 --> 00:11:52,260
Do you see that?
330
00:11:52,260 --> 00:11:54,662
- This us?
- They see us?
331
00:11:54,662 --> 00:11:55,739
- Hello.
- Hello!
332
00:11:55,739 --> 00:11:57,240
- Now we can see all of these posts of you
333
00:11:57,240 --> 00:11:58,221
going through America's-
334
00:11:58,221 --> 00:12:00,090
So we hit Times Square,
we see you then going down
335
00:12:00,090 --> 00:12:03,870
to Boston and then, from here,
just outside of Los Angeles.
336
00:12:03,870 --> 00:12:05,370
It seems like you exclusively stopped
337
00:12:05,370 --> 00:12:06,877
at what we call tourist traps.
338
00:12:06,877 --> 00:12:09,318
- [Zonton] Yes, we saw so
many interesting things
339
00:12:09,318 --> 00:12:10,500
on the side of the road!
340
00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:12,150
- [Marionette] Yes, we went to this place.
341
00:12:12,150 --> 00:12:15,570
There is, like, a statue
of a troll under a bridge.
342
00:12:15,570 --> 00:12:17,310
- Oh, okay, so another doll.
343
00:12:17,310 --> 00:12:20,000
- Yeah, and we were like,
"Hello, are you okay?"
344
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,660
- Do you need help from your friends?
345
00:12:21,660 --> 00:12:22,493
- Do you need help?
346
00:12:22,493 --> 00:12:25,014
- Better hope that one
doesn't come to life.
347
00:12:25,014 --> 00:12:25,847
- [Both] Why?
348
00:12:25,847 --> 00:12:28,191
- He should experience life.
- Why would you say that?
349
00:12:28,191 --> 00:12:30,448
- Well, it's just trolls
are scary, typically.
350
00:12:30,448 --> 00:12:35,448
(speaking gibberish)
(hon hon hon-ing)
351
00:12:35,732 --> 00:12:38,160
- Je parle un peu fran�ais.
352
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:39,420
- Huh?
353
00:12:39,420 --> 00:12:41,340
- I heard on your travels, you
two have actually developed
354
00:12:41,340 --> 00:12:44,094
new hobbies outside of each
other, is that correct?
355
00:12:44,094 --> 00:12:44,927
- [Both] Oui.
356
00:12:44,927 --> 00:12:46,650
- I've taken up reading poetry.
357
00:12:46,650 --> 00:12:48,120
- Amazing, well, we actually have a video
358
00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:49,680
from an open mic that you did recently
359
00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:51,660
if we wanna go ahead and watch that there.
360
00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:53,810
- Hello, I'd like to
read an original poem.
361
00:12:55,390 --> 00:13:00,115
(speaking dramatic "French")
362
00:13:04,710 --> 00:13:05,793
Me knife!
363
00:13:06,989 --> 00:13:08,160
(snapping)
364
00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:08,993
- Yes.
365
00:13:08,993 --> 00:13:10,110
- Groovy stuff.
366
00:13:10,110 --> 00:13:11,480
- You took the words...
367
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:14,340
And you?
- Oh, yes, I do a lot
368
00:13:14,340 --> 00:13:15,600
of latte art.
369
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,810
- Okay, well, that sounds just
lovely. It's a real skill.
370
00:13:18,810 --> 00:13:20,130
- Oh, thank you.
- A marketable skill
371
00:13:20,130 --> 00:13:21,300
in this environment, I would say.
372
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:22,500
- Yeah, you'd be surprised.
373
00:13:22,500 --> 00:13:24,870
People don't seem to like
what I art on the latt�s.
374
00:13:24,870 --> 00:13:25,710
- And what do you mean by that?
375
00:13:25,710 --> 00:13:29,400
- Their art is some of
the most harrowing, dark,
376
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:34,080
criminal depictions of
human struggle and strife.
377
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:36,352
- Like, spooky art? Like, for Halloween.
378
00:13:36,352 --> 00:13:37,630
- No.
- Spooky?
379
00:13:37,630 --> 00:13:38,505
- People love that.
380
00:13:38,505 --> 00:13:40,440
- No, it's not spooky.
381
00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:42,330
Spooky is like, pfft, spooky is nothing.
382
00:13:42,330 --> 00:13:44,040
This is, like, scary.
383
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,390
Like, you receive your coffee
384
00:13:45,390 --> 00:13:47,970
and then immediately you
vomit inside into it.
385
00:13:47,970 --> 00:13:49,320
- I think we have a photo of it.
386
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:51,066
And so, and just go ahead
387
00:13:51,066 --> 00:13:53,679
and click through the
content warning there.
388
00:13:53,679 --> 00:13:54,890
- Oh.
- Oh, yes.
389
00:13:54,890 --> 00:13:56,760
- It is so hard to look at.
390
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,700
My favorite part is how
the things in his stomach
391
00:13:59,700 --> 00:14:01,470
are coming out of the slit in the neck.
392
00:14:01,470 --> 00:14:02,430
- [Marionette] That's right.
393
00:14:02,430 --> 00:14:05,210
- Looks like my dad. (laughs nervously)
394
00:14:05,210 --> 00:14:06,870
(laid-back music)
395
00:14:06,870 --> 00:14:08,400
We have a couple of rapid fire questions
396
00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:09,968
that we ask all of our guests.
397
00:14:09,968 --> 00:14:10,987
- [Both] Fire, fire!
- No, it's not fire-
398
00:14:10,987 --> 00:14:12,768
- Everybody's on fire!
- It's not fire,
399
00:14:12,768 --> 00:14:14,134
it's not like that.
400
00:14:14,134 --> 00:14:15,840
That's my fault because
I did, and now I know.
401
00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:17,520
Rephrasing, we have some quick questions
402
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:18,480
we're gonna ask you two.
403
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:19,980
- Okay, sure.
404
00:14:19,980 --> 00:14:21,510
- What did you eat for breakfast?
405
00:14:21,510 --> 00:14:23,018
- Omelet.
- Omurice.
406
00:14:23,940 --> 00:14:26,193
- I'm sorry?
- Omu-ru-rice.
407
00:14:26,193 --> 00:14:28,650
- Okay, how old are you?
408
00:14:28,650 --> 00:14:32,490
- We have different numbers in
France. We measure in crumbs.
409
00:14:32,490 --> 00:14:34,950
- Well if you can do the
conversion to human years
410
00:14:34,950 --> 00:14:35,783
for us, that would be
411
00:14:35,783 --> 00:14:37,200
an ideal situation-
- Well, I guess
412
00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,120
we wouldn't know, right?
413
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:43,466
- Say about 450, 500 crumbs.
- Little crumbs,
414
00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:45,298
which is like-
- 450, 500 crumbs?
415
00:14:45,298 --> 00:14:47,005
- Seven and, uh-
- It's seven and we
416
00:14:47,005 --> 00:14:48,795
are probably like, you know, so many years
417
00:14:48,795 --> 00:14:51,852
before the crumbs.
- 14? 14?
418
00:14:51,852 --> 00:14:53,527
- 1440?
419
00:14:53,527 --> 00:14:55,530
- 14 to 40.
- 14 to 40?
420
00:14:55,530 --> 00:14:56,973
- We were made in 1440.
421
00:14:58,170 --> 00:15:00,903
- Do you actually speak French?
422
00:15:00,903 --> 00:15:02,730
- Oui, s�, oui.
423
00:15:02,730 --> 00:15:04,056
- What kind of question is this?
424
00:15:04,056 --> 00:15:04,889
- S�, oui oui!
425
00:15:04,889 --> 00:15:06,373
- Well that was a French word right there.
426
00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:07,920
- This is what they call
"got you" journalism.
427
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:10,680
- Oh, you trying to say,
"Oh, they're not from!"
428
00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:11,940
- I bet you want to clip that.
429
00:15:11,940 --> 00:15:13,620
- Oh, maybe we play a
tiny little game here,
430
00:15:13,620 --> 00:15:14,620
if we have a second.
431
00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:18,093
So I'll say something and then
you say it in French, okay?
432
00:15:18,093 --> 00:15:19,695
- You are too excited. Okay.
- Yes, of course!
433
00:15:19,695 --> 00:15:23,667
- So let's start with, "Oh,
I'm having so much fun."
434
00:15:24,667 --> 00:15:28,470
(speaking gibberish)
435
00:15:28,470 --> 00:15:31,440
- Why don't we just do
something really, really simple.
436
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:34,023
I'm going to the library today.
437
00:15:34,023 --> 00:15:36,257
�D�nde est� la biblioteca?
438
00:15:37,470 --> 00:15:39,390
- It's not my first language by any means,
439
00:15:39,390 --> 00:15:41,438
but is that not Spanish?
440
00:15:41,438 --> 00:15:43,533
(both humming)
441
00:15:43,533 --> 00:15:46,950
- I think it's French. The
words that I say are French.
442
00:15:46,950 --> 00:15:48,782
- Seems like it is French to you.
443
00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:50,940
(both laughing)
444
00:15:50,940 --> 00:15:52,560
- So I'm gonna go ahead and ask a question
445
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,000
I ask all of my guests.
446
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,740
- What is the color
you are most afraid of?
447
00:15:55,740 --> 00:15:57,140
- No, that's not the
question, but that is a-
448
00:15:57,140 --> 00:15:58,740
- Do you hug soft or hard?
449
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:00,810
- So once again, I'm gonna
ask the questions and you two
450
00:16:00,810 --> 00:16:02,103
are gonna sort of answer-
- What is a lunch you feel
451
00:16:02,103 --> 00:16:04,270
like you could not get
anymore 'cause you're too old?
452
00:16:04,270 --> 00:16:06,030
- Okay, so that is another question
453
00:16:06,030 --> 00:16:08,070
and I'm gonna be looking for
an answer in a moment here.
454
00:16:08,070 --> 00:16:12,870
So keep that energy, all right?
What is the meaning of life?
455
00:16:12,870 --> 00:16:14,760
- To find Her.
456
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:16,830
- She must be found.
- We will find her.
457
00:16:16,830 --> 00:16:17,820
- And that's beautiful.
458
00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,380
And find your thing,
459
00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:22,180
I guess is-
- To be reunited.
460
00:16:22,180 --> 00:16:24,516
- To be reunited with those you love.
461
00:16:24,516 --> 00:16:26,940
- Oui.
- We will be so excited.
462
00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:30,930
- We will get played with,
our hair will be combed.
463
00:16:30,930 --> 00:16:31,763
- Really incredible.
464
00:16:31,763 --> 00:16:35,550
Well, she cultivated two
pretty spectacular dolls
465
00:16:35,550 --> 00:16:36,510
is what I will say.
466
00:16:36,510 --> 00:16:37,343
- Aye!
467
00:16:38,310 --> 00:16:39,150
- It's nice.
468
00:16:39,150 --> 00:16:41,490
- All right, we have a TikTok video
469
00:16:41,490 --> 00:16:43,863
of your announcement to find the creator,
470
00:16:44,970 --> 00:16:46,687
so we're gonna go ahead
and take a look at that.
471
00:16:46,687 --> 00:16:51,670
(upbeat music)
472
00:17:07,140 --> 00:17:09,330
- Yeah, someone said this is the only way
473
00:17:09,330 --> 00:17:11,520
to find someone you are looking for.
474
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:13,590
They call them web sleuths.
475
00:17:13,590 --> 00:17:14,423
- Web sleuths.
476
00:17:14,423 --> 00:17:15,931
- [Marionette] Web sleuths.
- Wonderful.
477
00:17:15,931 --> 00:17:17,438
- They will help us find her.
478
00:17:17,438 --> 00:17:20,890
- All right, and, actually,
I am so pleased to announce
479
00:17:21,900 --> 00:17:24,960
one of those TikTokkers,
KittyCat55, did heed your call
480
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:29,520
and found a photo of you
two with your creator.
481
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:31,948
So if we can go ahead and
pop that on the monitor.
482
00:17:31,948 --> 00:17:34,470
(both sighing)
483
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:35,303
- There she is!
484
00:17:35,303 --> 00:17:37,065
- Is that her?
- This is her!
485
00:17:37,065 --> 00:17:38,565
- It is her!
- It is her.
486
00:17:38,565 --> 00:17:40,410
- And she's about 400 crumbs.
487
00:17:40,410 --> 00:17:41,250
- That's right.
488
00:17:41,250 --> 00:17:44,100
- Getting confirmation
that this is in fact her,
489
00:17:44,100 --> 00:17:46,560
we have a very special guest here.
490
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:48,419
- [Both] Could it be?
491
00:17:48,419 --> 00:17:49,537
- You wouldn't trick us again.
- Is it her?
492
00:17:49,537 --> 00:17:50,370
Sarah?
493
00:17:51,415 --> 00:17:52,605
Please!
- She's here?
494
00:17:52,605 --> 00:17:54,288
- Thank you so much for joining us today-
495
00:17:54,288 --> 00:17:56,223
- Sarah?
- Sarah.
496
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:00,630
- No!
- We found her.
497
00:18:00,630 --> 00:18:02,996
- What is this supposed to be?
- Is it her?
498
00:18:02,996 --> 00:18:05,458
- Do not say that!
- Don't say it!
499
00:18:05,458 --> 00:18:06,630
- Do not say that!
500
00:18:06,630 --> 00:18:09,990
- So Sarah did die in 1987,
according to our records.
501
00:18:09,990 --> 00:18:14,550
That photo is quite old.
- When was her photo taken?
502
00:18:14,550 --> 00:18:16,786
- 1986.
503
00:18:16,786 --> 00:18:18,728
- Okay, right now it is-
504
00:18:18,728 --> 00:18:20,478
- 2023.
- [Zonton] 86, 87?
505
00:18:21,361 --> 00:18:23,981
- [Both] 2023?
506
00:18:23,981 --> 00:18:26,880
- Yeah, 2023.
- 87, 30...
507
00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:28,892
- Carry the crumb. What?
508
00:18:30,158 --> 00:18:31,865
- This is so fucked.
509
00:18:31,865 --> 00:18:34,495
- This is the most fucked!
510
00:18:34,495 --> 00:18:36,273
- Okay-
- Gentle!
511
00:18:37,890 --> 00:18:41,040
- Could we have a moment to say goodbye?
512
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,073
- Please, anything you would
like to say to Sarah, please.
513
00:18:44,940 --> 00:18:49,140
- Sarah, what a cruel moment.
514
00:18:49,140 --> 00:18:53,880
It is so ironic that you used
to hold our little bodies
515
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,190
and stroke us like this
516
00:18:56,190 --> 00:18:59,770
and now we are holding your little body
517
00:19:01,350 --> 00:19:03,540
and stroking you like this.
518
00:19:03,540 --> 00:19:07,800
I wish I could put you
on a pillow next to me
519
00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:10,000
and whisper, "Je t'aime."
520
00:19:11,370 --> 00:19:15,693
- In the famous words of
poet Pierre Jean-Bulge,
521
00:19:16,807 --> 00:19:21,160
"You are wind and soon wind becomes dust
522
00:19:22,710 --> 00:19:24,370
and dust becomes wind again
523
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:29,400
and wind can never be dust fully
524
00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:32,750
until it is dust and wind."
525
00:19:34,087 --> 00:19:36,300
- Wow.
- "And sometimes-"
526
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,987
- Shh, there's more!
527
00:19:37,987 --> 00:19:41,220
- "The wind in the dust
will touch the moon.
528
00:19:41,220 --> 00:19:43,207
Kissing-"
- He's not done.
529
00:19:43,207 --> 00:19:48,207
- "Smooching and turning
itself off for the sun to rise.
530
00:19:49,140 --> 00:19:51,626
For there is no wind without the sun."
531
00:19:51,626 --> 00:19:54,175
- That-
- "There is no dust
532
00:19:54,175 --> 00:19:55,950
without the moon.
533
00:19:57,685 --> 00:20:00,270
(claps)
And I could not
534
00:20:00,270 --> 00:20:02,277
put my pen down unless I said."
535
00:20:04,820 --> 00:20:05,730
(clapping)
536
00:20:05,730 --> 00:20:07,863
- Stunning, beautiful.
537
00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:12,030
Okay and that is still
a biohazard material-
538
00:20:12,030 --> 00:20:13,440
- They used to do this a lot.
539
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:14,490
- Oh, did they?
- Yes.
540
00:20:14,490 --> 00:20:17,070
- Okay and, well, and
actually, as a parting gift,
541
00:20:17,070 --> 00:20:19,290
we would like to send you home with Sarah.
542
00:20:19,290 --> 00:20:21,274
- Sarah's tooth!
543
00:20:21,274 --> 00:20:23,555
(all giggling)
544
00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:26,508
Sarah's- Sarah, I'm so sorry!
545
00:20:26,508 --> 00:20:28,162
- [Marionette] Oh, you
kissed her tooth away!
546
00:20:28,162 --> 00:20:29,020
- [Vic] Why don't we just pop it
547
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:29,886
back in?
- I kissed her tooth off.
548
00:20:29,886 --> 00:20:31,737
I kissed her tooth off!
549
00:20:31,737 --> 00:20:32,865
- You kiss her tooth off!
550
00:20:32,865 --> 00:20:34,920
You must be a really good kisser.
551
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:37,539
- I kissed her tooth off.
- Kisses good.
552
00:20:37,539 --> 00:20:38,490
- I'm so sorry, Sarah.
- Well, we would like
553
00:20:38,490 --> 00:20:40,770
to send you home with Sarah.
554
00:20:40,770 --> 00:20:41,820
You were once her play thing
555
00:20:41,820 --> 00:20:44,404
and now she can be your play thing.
556
00:20:44,404 --> 00:20:46,170
(both weeping)
557
00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:47,820
And that is our show!
558
00:20:47,820 --> 00:20:51,270
I'm Vic Michaelis, reminding
you to be true to yourself
559
00:20:51,270 --> 00:20:53,190
unless you'd rather be somebody else.
560
00:20:53,190 --> 00:20:54,769
Goodnight.
561
00:20:54,769 --> 00:20:55,740
(wailing continues)
562
00:20:55,740 --> 00:20:56,965
Do you like it?
563
00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:58,785
- [Both] Goodnight Sarah.
564
00:20:58,785 --> 00:21:00,360
- Yeah.
565
00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:04,060
- This is what I will do to MSNBC!
566
00:21:04,060 --> 00:21:06,643
(upbeat music)
567
00:21:06,693 --> 00:21:11,243
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