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1
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Previously on Mom...
2
00:00:02,620 --> 00:00:04,333
(laughs): Oh!
3
00:00:04,358 --> 00:00:06,391
- Oh.
- Uh, too rough?
4
00:00:06,416 --> 00:00:08,182
No. This would be too rough.
5
00:00:08,251 --> 00:00:09,917
Ow! (growls)
6
00:00:09,942 --> 00:00:11,875
Best date I ever had.
7
00:00:11,988 --> 00:00:13,421
I need to break up with him.
8
00:00:13,650 --> 00:00:16,935
I have one more daffodil
hidden somewhere on my body.
9
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:18,459
Care to lead the search party?
10
00:00:18,484 --> 00:00:20,238
Rudy, we need to talk.
11
00:00:20,263 --> 00:00:23,455
RUDY: No... !
12
00:00:24,780 --> 00:00:26,301
♪♪
13
00:00:26,370 --> 00:00:27,669
(sighs)
14
00:00:28,420 --> 00:00:30,772
Look at us. (chuckles)
15
00:00:30,841 --> 00:00:32,007
What?
16
00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,408
Look at us.
17
00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:35,436
Who's better than us?
18
00:00:35,912 --> 00:00:37,312
Uh...
19
00:00:37,381 --> 00:00:40,142
I mean, missionaries, I guess.
20
00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:42,250
I don't know, I don't know.
Where are you going with this?
21
00:00:42,319 --> 00:00:44,519
We are so mentally healthy.
22
00:00:44,862 --> 00:00:47,915
We are so dogged in our
pursuit of better-ness.
23
00:00:47,940 --> 00:00:49,885
I feel like I'm getting
set up for a favor.
24
00:00:49,910 --> 00:00:51,843
Do you need your feet pumiced again?
25
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:54,438
I just mean, here I am, dropping you off
26
00:00:54,463 --> 00:00:57,259
at your Al-Anon meeting,
en route to my AA meeting.
27
00:00:57,284 --> 00:01:00,018
So again I say, who's better than us?
28
00:01:00,441 --> 00:01:02,174
(chuckles)
29
00:01:02,199 --> 00:01:04,720
People who don't need those
meetings in the first place?
30
00:01:06,037 --> 00:01:07,603
But who else?
31
00:01:07,628 --> 00:01:08,574
No one.
32
00:01:08,626 --> 00:01:10,626
- There you go. (chuckles)
- Ah. (laughs)
33
00:01:12,829 --> 00:01:16,097
So... do you talk about me?
34
00:01:17,615 --> 00:01:21,283
Well, it is an Al-Anon
meeting, and you're my Al.
35
00:01:21,532 --> 00:01:24,199
So, uh, yeah, yeah, you come up.
36
00:01:24,275 --> 00:01:26,475
And do you speak well of me?
37
00:01:26,578 --> 00:01:28,511
Yes, Bonnie, I'm the
only person in there
38
00:01:28,536 --> 00:01:30,359
whose alcoholic is perfect.
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(chuckles)
40
00:01:31,582 --> 00:01:33,570
- Okay, but I'm not the worst.
- No, no.
41
00:01:34,819 --> 00:01:37,257
Was that a genuine "no"
or a sarcastic "no"?
42
00:01:37,282 --> 00:01:39,916
It's whatever you want it to be.
43
00:01:39,941 --> 00:01:41,040
Again...
44
00:01:41,323 --> 00:01:43,256
(singsongy): who's better than us.
45
00:01:43,281 --> 00:01:44,880
(both chuckle)
46
00:01:47,345 --> 00:01:48,611
Who's that?
47
00:01:48,636 --> 00:01:50,235
That's Sam, my sponsor.
48
00:01:50,569 --> 00:01:52,235
Your sponsor wears suspenders?
49
00:01:52,260 --> 00:01:53,959
No wonder his wife drinks.
50
00:01:53,984 --> 00:01:55,382
ADAM: No, that's Carl.
51
00:01:55,407 --> 00:01:57,210
Sam's standing next to him, smoking.
52
00:01:59,878 --> 00:02:02,813
- That's Sam?
- Yeah.
53
00:02:03,107 --> 00:02:05,808
The same Sam you've been
talking about for three months?
54
00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:07,038
Yeah. Yeah.
55
00:02:09,439 --> 00:02:11,606
So the "antha" is silent.
56
00:02:13,362 --> 00:02:15,362
Any chance we could all be?
57
00:02:16,395 --> 00:02:19,145
♪♪
58
00:02:40,318 --> 00:02:41,966
Found him!
59
00:02:43,848 --> 00:02:46,075
What are you doing in
here for 20 minutes?
60
00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:47,891
We're backed up.
61
00:02:47,916 --> 00:02:50,817
Waiters are cooking their own orders.
62
00:02:51,208 --> 00:02:54,141
I came in for an onion but
got lost in my memories.
63
00:02:54,166 --> 00:02:56,200
Oh, I don't need to hear it.
64
00:02:56,225 --> 00:02:58,957
This is where Tammy and
I shared our first kiss.
65
00:02:58,982 --> 00:03:00,415
And our last kiss.
66
00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:03,494
- Oh, God.
- Does she ever talk about me at all?
67
00:03:04,271 --> 00:03:06,231
How about we talk and cook?
68
00:03:06,256 --> 00:03:07,522
- Talk and cook!
- No, no, no.
69
00:03:07,810 --> 00:03:09,535
Could you text her for me?
70
00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,226
Huh? Tell her I'm miserable without her.
71
00:03:11,251 --> 00:03:13,685
No, that sounds weak.
Tell her I'm in play.
72
00:03:13,710 --> 00:03:16,244
No, just tell her I'm fine
with whatever she wants.
73
00:03:16,269 --> 00:03:18,450
No big whoop either way.
74
00:03:19,003 --> 00:03:20,535
"Rudy says hi."
75
00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:23,761
Ah, subtle. Well played.
Shocking you're a spinster.
76
00:03:26,954 --> 00:03:28,386
Did she text back yet?
77
00:03:28,411 --> 00:03:29,544
- No.
- Oh.
78
00:03:29,726 --> 00:03:31,323
- How about now?
- No!
79
00:03:31,348 --> 00:03:32,733
- Oh. Now?
- You would hear it!
80
00:03:32,758 --> 00:03:35,272
Well, I thought maybe it happened
when I was saying, "Now?"
81
00:03:35,297 --> 00:03:38,444
- (phone chimes)
- Ooh, bingo.
82
00:03:38,832 --> 00:03:41,788
Mm. Some ass named Roscoe
said he got an "A" in English.
83
00:03:41,813 --> 00:03:43,713
Oh, give me that!
84
00:03:51,522 --> 00:03:52,955
How was your meeting?
85
00:03:52,980 --> 00:03:54,914
Good. Yours?
86
00:03:54,939 --> 00:03:56,338
Good. Good.
87
00:03:56,805 --> 00:03:58,273
Did you share?
88
00:03:58,342 --> 00:04:01,578
- I did.
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
89
00:04:01,603 --> 00:04:05,571
And did you talk about
Sam having a vagina?
90
00:04:07,178 --> 00:04:09,844
No, but I did talk about
how this ride was gonna go,
91
00:04:09,869 --> 00:04:12,736
and so far, I was right on the money.
92
00:04:13,151 --> 00:04:15,918
Oh, is it not going well
for you? 'Cause I'm fine.
93
00:04:16,070 --> 00:04:18,673
Oh, come on, Bonnie. So
what if Sam's a woman?
94
00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:20,992
I just find it curious
you never told me.
95
00:04:21,017 --> 00:04:22,771
I didn't even think about it at first,
96
00:04:22,796 --> 00:04:24,276
and then the longer I didn't tell you,
97
00:04:24,301 --> 00:04:26,134
the weirder I felt
about saying something.
98
00:04:26,159 --> 00:04:27,225
You know,
99
00:04:27,250 --> 00:04:29,350
I missed my window.
100
00:04:29,511 --> 00:04:32,112
Like the guy at the deli,
who still gets my name wrong.
101
00:04:32,137 --> 00:04:34,470
I should've corrected him
the second time, but I didn't.
102
00:04:34,495 --> 00:04:37,325
So now I'm forever "Beef Baloney Dan."
103
00:04:37,940 --> 00:04:39,573
(laughs)
104
00:04:39,691 --> 00:04:41,691
Who's better than us?
105
00:04:46,418 --> 00:04:48,351
You listen to me, Mr. Adam Janikowski.
106
00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:49,686
You cannot just sit there and pretend
107
00:04:49,711 --> 00:04:50,977
this is not a big deal!
108
00:04:51,974 --> 00:04:53,507
No, no, I'm talking!
109
00:04:56,047 --> 00:04:57,580
You obviously kept her a secret
110
00:04:57,605 --> 00:04:58,831
because you have feelings for her.
111
00:04:58,949 --> 00:05:00,982
Oh, that is such a lie!
112
00:05:03,992 --> 00:05:06,559
Oh, nice try, nice try. We're
not changing the subject.
113
00:05:06,584 --> 00:05:08,265
Oh, and of course she smokes.
114
00:05:08,290 --> 00:05:11,458
"Who's hotter than me? Me, who smokes."
115
00:05:12,015 --> 00:05:14,203
Are we gonna start smoking again?
116
00:05:14,228 --> 00:05:16,996
Well, I should, because
apparently it turns Adam on.
117
00:05:17,021 --> 00:05:19,155
So it's yes? 'Cause the
off-brand gas station
118
00:05:19,180 --> 00:05:21,812
is still open, and they're
50 cents a pack cheaper there.
119
00:05:21,837 --> 00:05:23,836
Give me eight bucks,
I can make this happen.
120
00:05:24,543 --> 00:05:26,576
We're not smoking. I'm
just pissed at Adam,
121
00:05:26,601 --> 00:05:28,601
who's sleeping like he doesn't
have a problem in the world.
122
00:05:28,626 --> 00:05:31,859
(quietly): Well, you do, buddy!
You got a big, fat problem!
123
00:05:32,257 --> 00:05:33,930
Oh, I get it.
124
00:05:33,955 --> 00:05:35,469
You're in a whisper fight.
125
00:05:35,494 --> 00:05:37,430
I used to do that with you all the time.
126
00:05:37,596 --> 00:05:38,528
Deal me in.
127
00:05:39,469 --> 00:05:41,922
His Al-Anon sponsor is a woman.
128
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:43,092
Sam?
129
00:05:43,117 --> 00:05:44,570
"antha."
130
00:05:44,595 --> 00:05:47,062
Like in, "Meanwhile, across town,
131
00:05:47,087 --> 00:05:50,688
Samantha was flat on her back
in the Flatiron District."
132
00:05:51,119 --> 00:05:53,019
(groans): Oh.
133
00:05:53,044 --> 00:05:54,677
I so miss Sex and the City.
134
00:05:54,702 --> 00:05:56,711
And sex.
135
00:05:58,364 --> 00:06:01,875
I'm gonna miss sex with Adam
when he leaves me for Samantha.
136
00:06:02,706 --> 00:06:04,739
I'll still have sex, but I'll miss Adam.
137
00:06:06,167 --> 00:06:08,367
Sorry, I just don't see what's so bad.
138
00:06:08,421 --> 00:06:10,087
My G.A. sponsor is a guy.
139
00:06:10,112 --> 00:06:13,480
Yeah, uh, I've seen him.
Least sexy guy on the planet.
140
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:15,757
I'm up against Angie frickin' Dickinson.
141
00:06:15,818 --> 00:06:18,820
- Who's that?
- Oh, for God's sake!
142
00:06:19,396 --> 00:06:21,497
Just go to bed.
143
00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:24,984
So... it's definitely
a no on the smoking?
144
00:06:25,009 --> 00:06:28,177
Look, if I'm divorced by
the weekend, we can smoke.
145
00:06:28,470 --> 00:06:30,137
I like my chances.
146
00:06:31,271 --> 00:06:33,271
I might buy a lighter.
147
00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:41,926
What are you doing?
148
00:06:42,709 --> 00:06:44,754
Chef Rudy asked me to
take pictures of you.
149
00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:46,842
I get bonus points
if your mouth is open.
150
00:06:51,875 --> 00:06:53,880
That is super creepy.
151
00:06:53,905 --> 00:06:55,326
Why'd you say yes?
152
00:06:55,351 --> 00:06:57,051
I actually feel sorry for the guy.
153
00:06:57,331 --> 00:06:59,665
He talks about you. He cries about you.
154
00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:02,153
He yells your name when
he's pounding the veal.
155
00:07:02,178 --> 00:07:03,436
Ew!
156
00:07:04,065 --> 00:07:06,123
No, literally, we serve a lot of veal.
157
00:07:07,436 --> 00:07:09,646
Then my plan is working.
158
00:07:09,671 --> 00:07:10,737
What plan?
159
00:07:10,762 --> 00:07:13,496
Love is a game, Christy,
and I'm great at it.
160
00:07:13,521 --> 00:07:15,732
I thought you didn't want to have
a relationship with Chef Rudy.
161
00:07:15,757 --> 00:07:16,956
I thought I didn't either,
162
00:07:16,981 --> 00:07:18,914
and then, last Tuesday
night around 10:00, I did.
163
00:07:19,140 --> 00:07:21,006
So I butt-dialed him with my fingers
164
00:07:21,031 --> 00:07:23,467
and made sounds like I
was taking a bubble bath.
165
00:07:23,819 --> 00:07:26,147
Wait, hang on. What
would that sound like?
166
00:07:26,172 --> 00:07:27,338
Mm.
167
00:07:28,252 --> 00:07:30,748
(giddy laughing)
168
00:07:31,791 --> 00:07:33,458
Oh!
169
00:07:35,366 --> 00:07:38,267
You couldn't do that
with your own glass?
170
00:07:40,709 --> 00:07:42,155
I don't get playing games.
171
00:07:42,180 --> 00:07:43,913
When I like a guy, I just tell him.
172
00:07:43,938 --> 00:07:45,704
OTHERS: Oh!
173
00:07:45,729 --> 00:07:48,272
What? Men appreciate honesty.
174
00:07:48,297 --> 00:07:51,331
OTHERS: Oh!
175
00:07:51,356 --> 00:07:54,390
For God's sake, Christy, you
don't give away the mystery.
176
00:07:54,772 --> 00:07:56,257
I was a stripper.
177
00:07:56,282 --> 00:07:59,420
I've been giving away the
mystery since I was 18.
178
00:07:59,930 --> 00:08:02,897
Even I played a little
hard-to-get with Victor.
179
00:08:03,115 --> 00:08:05,749
Took him a while to tug
down those sweatpants, huh?
180
00:08:09,598 --> 00:08:12,508
Oh, don't look now, but
your plans just walked in
181
00:08:12,770 --> 00:08:14,651
and is acting surprised to see us.
182
00:08:14,676 --> 00:08:17,676
You know who isn't
surprised: the puppet master.
183
00:08:17,701 --> 00:08:19,801
Tammy! Ah, is that you?
184
00:08:20,547 --> 00:08:22,606
Tammy, what a strange coincidence.
185
00:08:22,631 --> 00:08:24,931
Ah, to think that I
would run into you here,
186
00:08:24,956 --> 00:08:28,124
at the, uh... Burgundy Bistro.
187
00:08:28,692 --> 00:08:32,504
Yes, I've been meaning
to try their, uh... oh...
188
00:08:32,671 --> 00:08:34,404
three-bean chili.
189
00:08:34,794 --> 00:08:36,961
- Chili, coming up.
- Ooh. Right.
190
00:08:36,986 --> 00:08:39,486
Well, I hope you don't
mind if I sit at this table
191
00:08:39,511 --> 00:08:41,077
adjacent to your own.
192
00:08:41,351 --> 00:08:44,085
(loudly): So, anyway, I've
got dates with both Ricardo
193
00:08:44,110 --> 00:08:45,209
and Brad tonight.
194
00:08:45,234 --> 00:08:46,800
I mean, I love Ricardo's fire,
195
00:08:46,825 --> 00:08:49,723
but Brad does manage a LensCrafters.
196
00:08:51,821 --> 00:08:54,221
- Oh, what to do?
- Mm.
197
00:08:55,792 --> 00:08:58,809
Not sure, but first I'm
off to wax Downtown Disney,
198
00:08:58,834 --> 00:09:02,074
'cause someone's getting
in my tea cup tonight.
199
00:09:05,094 --> 00:09:06,960
Here's your chili.
200
00:09:07,224 --> 00:09:10,225
Good Lord, has someone
already eaten this?
201
00:09:12,931 --> 00:09:14,431
Are you primping?
202
00:09:14,456 --> 00:09:16,668
Is there someone here
worth primping for?
203
00:09:17,643 --> 00:09:19,242
Owen.
204
00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:22,348
Hit bottom last year on
vodka and Mountain Dew.
205
00:09:22,957 --> 00:09:26,192
Ah, he is cute. How you gonna blow it?
206
00:09:26,217 --> 00:09:28,012
I am not gonna blow it.
207
00:09:28,037 --> 00:09:29,670
I'm gonna be the puppet master.
208
00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:31,468
Oh. Go get 'em, tiger.
209
00:09:31,493 --> 00:09:32,993
Oh, I'm gonna get him.
210
00:09:33,230 --> 00:09:36,999
I'm gonna get him so good he's
not gonna know what got him.
211
00:09:37,024 --> 00:09:40,285
Like a sexy sex ninja.
212
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:41,963
Just watch and learn.
213
00:09:41,988 --> 00:09:44,121
Oh, I'm gonna watch.
214
00:09:45,670 --> 00:09:47,603
Hey, Christy, looking for a seat?
215
00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:49,595
(scoffs) No.
216
00:09:51,918 --> 00:09:55,144
And the game is on.
217
00:09:55,605 --> 00:09:58,170
Is it, though?
218
00:09:58,327 --> 00:10:00,527
Oh, really, Adam? How would
you like it if I sponsored
219
00:10:00,552 --> 00:10:01,918
one of the cute guys in here?
220
00:10:01,986 --> 00:10:03,988
(sighs) Will you stop that?
221
00:10:04,013 --> 00:10:06,066
Tell him. He's the one
who won't let it go.
222
00:10:06,091 --> 00:10:07,857
You know you look crazy.
223
00:10:07,882 --> 00:10:10,703
Yeah. People on the street
were trying to give you change.
224
00:10:11,152 --> 00:10:13,373
One quarter. Relax.
225
00:10:13,398 --> 00:10:16,866
It doesn't matter who Adam
is hearing the message from,
226
00:10:16,891 --> 00:10:18,957
as long as he's hearing the message.
227
00:10:18,982 --> 00:10:20,443
My first sponsor was a guy.
228
00:10:20,468 --> 00:10:22,246
Yeah, but back then, there
were only three people
229
00:10:22,271 --> 00:10:23,504
in the program.
230
00:10:23,529 --> 00:10:25,529
(scoffs) She's old.
231
00:10:27,022 --> 00:10:29,122
Look at Owen ignoring me.
232
00:10:29,147 --> 00:10:31,447
He's good, but I'm better.
233
00:10:31,472 --> 00:10:33,372
(phone chimes)
234
00:10:33,397 --> 00:10:36,765
Oh. Guess who just
sent me a TikTok video?
235
00:10:36,921 --> 00:10:40,156
A 12-year-old you
met at the mall?
236
00:10:40,394 --> 00:10:43,536
Hi, Tammy. Ticktock. Ticktock.
237
00:10:43,561 --> 00:10:46,028
(groans) Paul, explain this to me again.
238
00:10:46,053 --> 00:10:48,520
I don't think I'm getting
it. Am I supposed to move?
239
00:10:48,547 --> 00:10:51,515
(stammers) Ticktock. Ticktock.
240
00:10:51,540 --> 00:10:53,474
Oh, no! Don't press send!
241
00:10:53,671 --> 00:10:55,638
That was painful.
242
00:10:55,663 --> 00:10:58,430
(sighs) In a super hot way.
243
00:10:58,455 --> 00:11:01,175
I'm gonna watch it again...
By myself, if you don't mind.
244
00:11:02,447 --> 00:11:03,479
(grunts softly)
245
00:11:03,504 --> 00:11:05,871
Wow, guy! No means no!
246
00:11:08,735 --> 00:11:10,568
(mouthing)
247
00:11:11,060 --> 00:11:13,194
How did that girl ever get married?
248
00:11:13,528 --> 00:11:15,528
Drugs were involved.
249
00:11:19,458 --> 00:11:20,926
She was out in the living room
250
00:11:20,951 --> 00:11:22,753
whisper-fighting with me all night.
251
00:11:22,778 --> 00:11:24,912
Why didn't you go talk to her?
252
00:11:25,263 --> 00:11:27,630
Because I have a better chance
of winning if I'm not there.
253
00:11:27,655 --> 00:11:29,622
(laughs)
254
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:32,809
Come on, Adam. Don't you think
you might owe Bonnie an amends?
255
00:11:32,834 --> 00:11:33,946
What am I supposed to say?
256
00:11:33,998 --> 00:11:36,265
I'm sorry I didn't tell
you that Sam was a woman?
257
00:11:36,633 --> 00:11:40,177
Thanks, Adam. I appreciate
you validating my feelings.
258
00:11:40,202 --> 00:11:41,768
What was that?
259
00:11:42,164 --> 00:11:43,813
I'm being Bonnie.
260
00:11:43,838 --> 00:11:46,239
(sputters) Not even close.
261
00:11:46,351 --> 00:11:48,451
First you got to make fun of my hair.
262
00:11:48,476 --> 00:11:51,110
- What's wrong with your hair?
- Thank you. Also,
263
00:11:51,135 --> 00:11:53,924
it's louder, it's scarier
and more arm waving.
264
00:11:54,234 --> 00:11:55,592
And if I make a good point,
265
00:11:55,617 --> 00:11:58,318
you got to bring up something
that I did wrong two years ago.
266
00:11:58,386 --> 00:12:01,625
Okay, so-so maybe just
stop at "I'm sorry."
267
00:12:01,813 --> 00:12:03,513
Just "I'm sorry"? I'm
allowed to do that?
268
00:12:03,538 --> 00:12:04,470
Sure.
269
00:12:04,736 --> 00:12:06,002
No, I'm asking Bonnie.
270
00:12:06,027 --> 00:12:07,460
Am I allowed to do that?
271
00:12:07,485 --> 00:12:08,884
Oh, um...
272
00:12:08,909 --> 00:12:11,743
Do whatever you want, Fluffy!
273
00:12:15,147 --> 00:12:17,039
That was good, but you got
to get on your chair.
274
00:12:17,064 --> 00:12:19,606
- Oh. Yeah.
- Okay.
275
00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:27,679
I traded up.
276
00:12:29,365 --> 00:12:31,899
Bonnie, I should've told
you that Sam was a woman.
277
00:12:32,093 --> 00:12:33,359
I was wrong,
278
00:12:33,384 --> 00:12:34,642
and...
279
00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:37,220
I'm sorry.
280
00:12:40,128 --> 00:12:41,924
And that's it.
281
00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:45,930
Gus, you're out.
282
00:12:46,145 --> 00:12:50,134
Daddy's home and he's singing
the sweet, sweet music.
283
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:51,403
So, we're good?
284
00:12:51,463 --> 00:12:53,516
Yeah. And I'm sorry, too.
285
00:12:53,541 --> 00:12:55,275
I should've stayed out of your program.
286
00:12:55,300 --> 00:12:57,300
It's definitely working for you. For us.
287
00:12:57,325 --> 00:12:58,758
It is. It is.
288
00:12:58,913 --> 00:13:01,648
So you're cool with me
having her as a sponsor?
289
00:13:01,673 --> 00:13:03,484
Couldn't be cooler. In fact,
it's great she's a woman.
290
00:13:03,509 --> 00:13:04,830
She'll help you understand me.
291
00:13:04,855 --> 00:13:07,589
She already has. She's the one
that suggested I say I'm sorry.
292
00:13:08,758 --> 00:13:09,891
Oh?
293
00:13:12,033 --> 00:13:13,799
That was Sam's idea?
294
00:13:13,824 --> 00:13:15,135
Yeah, she dropped by the bar today
295
00:13:15,601 --> 00:13:17,100
and she talked me through it.
296
00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:20,867
Oh. She dropped by the bar?
297
00:13:20,892 --> 00:13:22,564
Yeah.
298
00:13:22,835 --> 00:13:26,003
How often does she drop by the bar?
299
00:13:27,829 --> 00:13:29,495
When she's in the neighborhood.
300
00:13:30,523 --> 00:13:32,890
So she drops by the bar
301
00:13:32,915 --> 00:13:35,549
when she's in the neighborhood.
302
00:13:35,574 --> 00:13:37,607
Mm-hmm.
303
00:13:37,648 --> 00:13:41,157
And does she have a drink
when she drops by the bar
304
00:13:41,182 --> 00:13:42,848
'cause she's in the neighborhood?
305
00:13:43,792 --> 00:13:44,957
Oh, God.
306
00:13:45,026 --> 00:13:46,926
You are so naive!
307
00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:48,584
I work a lot,
308
00:13:48,609 --> 00:13:49,874
and it's on her way home.
309
00:13:49,899 --> 00:13:51,299
It's totally innocent.
310
00:13:51,324 --> 00:13:52,590
No, you're totally innocent.
311
00:13:52,615 --> 00:13:54,855
This is exactly like two years ago
312
00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:57,814
with the thing when I was right.
313
00:13:57,839 --> 00:14:01,441
W-W-Wait, d-don't you meet
Marjorie at the bistro?
314
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:04,654
Yes, where we sip soup loudly
in a brightly lit setting.
315
00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:07,101
Marjorie's got a napkin tucked
into her collar like a bib.
316
00:14:07,126 --> 00:14:09,559
Is that what Sam's doing?
She got a bib tucked in there?
317
00:14:09,584 --> 00:14:11,629
Or is she sipping a Pinot
and sucking on her cigarette
318
00:14:11,654 --> 00:14:14,121
like it's, you know, not a cigarette?
319
00:14:14,233 --> 00:14:16,800
I can't believe you don't trust me.
320
00:14:16,825 --> 00:14:18,324
Oh, I trust you. I don't trust her.
321
00:14:18,349 --> 00:14:19,459
(stammers) You don't even know her!
322
00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:21,284
Oh, I know her. I am her.
323
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:23,807
Or I was her. And I could still be her.
324
00:14:23,832 --> 00:14:26,838
But because of you,
I'm me and she's her!
325
00:14:28,452 --> 00:14:30,486
Wait. Wait, wait. You
have a male therapist
326
00:14:30,511 --> 00:14:32,716
who you meet alone in his house.
327
00:14:32,741 --> 00:14:34,173
Do I say anything about that?
328
00:14:34,198 --> 00:14:35,861
- Well, maybe you should.
- Uh... Wait, what?
329
00:14:35,886 --> 00:14:37,452
No. He's a mess.
330
00:14:38,847 --> 00:14:40,613
You know, Sam is helping me,
331
00:14:40,638 --> 00:14:42,071
and that's all that should matter.
332
00:14:42,096 --> 00:14:44,397
Gus, you're back in!
333
00:14:50,425 --> 00:14:53,793
If I just put my head in this
pot, it would all be over.
334
00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:59,943
Hey. Table four would like
to personally thank you
335
00:14:59,968 --> 00:15:01,534
for their branzino.
336
00:15:01,559 --> 00:15:04,093
Oh, would they? Don't
they know I'm in pain?
337
00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:07,293
Did they really like it?
338
00:15:07,318 --> 00:15:09,217
Yes. And they want to tell you.
339
00:15:09,397 --> 00:15:13,032
Have some Purell waiting
for me when I return.
340
00:15:18,947 --> 00:15:21,554
- Hello, Tammy.
- Hello, Rudy.
341
00:15:22,590 --> 00:15:24,056
What are you doing here?
342
00:15:24,125 --> 00:15:26,058
I miss you.
343
00:15:26,127 --> 00:15:28,033
I miss you, too.
344
00:15:28,058 --> 00:15:30,303
In case you couldn't tell from
the texts and the click-clock.
345
00:15:30,328 --> 00:15:31,894
(laughs)
346
00:15:32,133 --> 00:15:33,566
I loved your video.
347
00:15:33,591 --> 00:15:34,623
- You did?
- (laughs): Yeah.
348
00:15:34,736 --> 00:15:35,968
Why didn't you tell me?
349
00:15:36,037 --> 00:15:37,770
Well, a gal likes to
keep a guy guessing.
350
00:15:37,795 --> 00:15:39,094
You know, it's part of the game.
351
00:15:39,119 --> 00:15:40,452
Oh, the-the game?
352
00:15:40,477 --> 00:15:41,943
Yeah, you know, the game, the dance.
353
00:15:41,970 --> 00:15:44,604
How I worked you up,
pretending not to be interested.
354
00:15:45,814 --> 00:15:47,246
Oh, uh... wh...
355
00:15:47,315 --> 00:15:49,816
So, you were playing me?
356
00:15:49,841 --> 00:15:51,174
All in fun.
357
00:15:51,286 --> 00:15:53,553
Oh, there was nothing fun about it.
358
00:15:53,621 --> 00:15:54,754
You tortured me.
359
00:15:54,823 --> 00:15:57,156
Only so we could get here, now.
360
00:15:57,225 --> 00:16:00,893
Tammy, I'm a person. I have feelings.
361
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:03,952
I wanted a actual relationship with you,
362
00:16:03,977 --> 00:16:06,644
something significant,
something meaningful.
363
00:16:06,669 --> 00:16:08,269
So did I.
364
00:16:08,294 --> 00:16:10,027
Please don't be upset.
365
00:16:11,239 --> 00:16:12,805
It's too late.
366
00:16:21,483 --> 00:16:22,648
Wow.
367
00:16:23,685 --> 00:16:25,017
That did not go well.
368
00:16:25,086 --> 00:16:28,010
Are you kidding? I have
her right where I want her!
369
00:16:28,323 --> 00:16:30,823
And now the real game has begun!
370
00:16:34,729 --> 00:16:36,329
Damn it.
371
00:16:36,397 --> 00:16:39,065
Adam, if a woman sent
you a text as a lady panda
372
00:16:39,090 --> 00:16:41,825
with super long eyelashes,
you would text her back, right?
373
00:16:41,936 --> 00:16:44,537
I don't know. I find
flirty animals confusing.
374
00:16:44,606 --> 00:16:46,873
Rudy's driving me insane.
375
00:16:46,941 --> 00:16:49,542
I can't stop looking at my
phone. Here, you take it.
376
00:16:49,611 --> 00:16:51,489
No matter what I do, no
matter what I say, no matter
377
00:16:51,513 --> 00:16:53,646
how much I beg, do
not give it back to me.
378
00:16:53,671 --> 00:16:54,870
Okay.
379
00:16:54,983 --> 00:16:56,249
Give it back to me.
380
00:16:56,317 --> 00:16:57,416
Okay.
381
00:16:57,485 --> 00:16:59,619
(mouthing)
382
00:17:00,655 --> 00:17:02,054
Hey.
383
00:17:02,123 --> 00:17:04,423
Hey, I didn't expect to see you.
384
00:17:04,492 --> 00:17:05,992
I was on my way back from a meeting
385
00:17:06,060 --> 00:17:08,220
and I hadn't heard from you,
so I thought I'd check in.
386
00:17:08,263 --> 00:17:09,462
How'd it go with Bonnie?
387
00:17:09,531 --> 00:17:13,099
I took your advice, and
at first it went great.
388
00:17:13,124 --> 00:17:15,458
Oh, no. You went past sorry.
389
00:17:15,483 --> 00:17:18,150
(stammers) Just a little.
390
00:17:18,175 --> 00:17:20,008
(sighs) Why can't men learn?
391
00:17:20,059 --> 00:17:22,993
Once things are good, stop talking.
392
00:17:23,234 --> 00:17:25,634
Why can't women learn
that men don't learn?
393
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,647
(laughs)
394
00:17:27,715 --> 00:17:28,814
Uh, listen, I-I thought
395
00:17:28,883 --> 00:17:31,050
if she knew that my
apology was your idea,
396
00:17:31,075 --> 00:17:33,308
that she'd realize how
much you've been helping me.
397
00:17:33,333 --> 00:17:35,934
This is why I tell my
sponsees: stick to the script.
398
00:17:35,959 --> 00:17:37,893
Don't veer from the script.
399
00:17:37,918 --> 00:17:40,197
Yeah, I know. It's just, you
know, I don't want to feel tense
400
00:17:40,222 --> 00:17:41,988
every time I bring your name up.
401
00:17:42,013 --> 00:17:44,647
I mean, does your husband have a
problem with you sponsoring men?
402
00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:47,900
No. He has a problem
with everything else I do.
403
00:17:47,969 --> 00:17:50,269
But if you ever meet him,
don't tell him I said that.
404
00:17:50,338 --> 00:17:52,138
Noted.
405
00:17:52,206 --> 00:17:54,807
And if you ever meet Bonnie...
406
00:17:54,876 --> 00:17:57,209
Well, there's no way to
talk you through that one.
407
00:17:57,278 --> 00:17:59,045
(laughs)
408
00:17:59,113 --> 00:18:01,647
How about we agree to never
meet each other's spouses?
409
00:18:01,716 --> 00:18:02,648
Deal.
410
00:18:02,673 --> 00:18:03,839
(chuckles)
411
00:18:08,690 --> 00:18:11,524
What's happening?
412
00:18:16,698 --> 00:18:18,698
(sighs)
413
00:18:21,936 --> 00:18:23,536
(exhales)
414
00:18:23,548 --> 00:18:25,746
You were right.
415
00:18:25,798 --> 00:18:29,300
Damn it! This is not how I
want to look when I'm right.
416
00:18:31,246 --> 00:18:33,079
Yeah. I'll tell you again tomorrow.
417
00:18:38,414 --> 00:18:42,029
(groans) I can't believe
Rudy's still ghosting me.
418
00:18:42,054 --> 00:18:44,054
Isn't that what you did to him?
419
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:46,194
Yeah, but I did it as a game.
420
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,793
Um, hello.
421
00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:52,540
Oh, my God.
422
00:18:52,565 --> 00:18:55,666
That crazy, sexy genius.
423
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:59,170
The puppeteer has become the puppet.
424
00:18:59,778 --> 00:19:01,691
Owen's doing the same thing to me.
425
00:19:01,716 --> 00:19:03,149
He's playing so hard to get,
426
00:19:03,174 --> 00:19:05,741
I saw him making out with
someone else during my share.
427
00:19:06,129 --> 00:19:07,228
(sighs)
428
00:19:07,353 --> 00:19:09,941
Well, Rudy leaves me no
choice. Take my phone.
429
00:19:09,941 --> 00:19:12,475
No matter what I say, do
not give it back to me.
430
00:19:12,593 --> 00:19:14,393
But doesn't that just
mean neither of you
431
00:19:14,418 --> 00:19:15,502
are speaking to each other?
432
00:19:15,527 --> 00:19:18,479
Oh, Christy, do you
know nothing of love?
433
00:19:21,622 --> 00:19:23,722
Oh, look. It's Owen.
434
00:19:23,747 --> 00:19:25,113
(scoffs)
435
00:19:25,180 --> 00:19:27,613
Dude...
436
00:19:27,638 --> 00:19:29,738
get over me.
30943
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