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Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
This is a time machine.
By standing on this platform
and moving this lever,
one can be transported into the future.
[machine buzzing, beeping]
[sounds stop]
It’s positively amazing.
Positively amazing.
I’m going to stay. Things are much better, much better.
[bell dings]
"For failure to file income tax returns
for the years, 1960 through 1975, you are hereby..."
[machine buzzing, beeping]
[sounds stop]
I think I shall take the future one moment at a time.
So, in just one moment, tonight’s story.
[phone ringing]
I thought you were going to the market this afternoon.
I got back half an hour ago.
You know, I couldn’t find a single can of nectarines in the place?
You don’t say.
Are you going to the bingo game tomorrow?
I suppose so.
I just hope you-know-who doesn’t sit at our table again.
Talk about wet blankets.
Did you see that hat she wore?
She must have stole it off a scarecrow.
And she had the nerve to complain about Jacob not wearing a tie.
Honestly, the crust that woman has.
And the older she gets, the worse she gets.
Well, I could’ve screamed when she started telling that story again.
About the time that she won two bingo games in a row.
Listen, if you wanna hear about stories,
I could tell you plenty about her.
But you never know who’s listening in on a party line, do you?
Busybodies.
Nero! Get away from there, you bad dog!
[doorbell rings]
One minute.
[doorbell rings]
One minute.
Yes?
You Mrs. Helen Parch?
That’s right. Who are you?
My name is Atkins.
I’m with the County Sheriff’s Office. Could I come in a minute?
What’s the Sheriff’s Office want with me, Mr. Atkins?
I just wanna talk, Mrs. Parch,
about something that might be important.
Could we step into the parlor?
Important? You sure you have the right place?
I’m sure.
Come in then.
Thank you.
Well, it’s a lot cooler in here. Must be 90 on the road.
Maybe you’d like a cold drink.
No, thanks, ma’am.
I’m kind of busy today, Mr. Atkins. I’m putting up my preserves.
This won’t take long.
Have a seat.
Thank you.
Mrs. Parch...
you remember a man called...
Heyward Miller?
Miller?
No, the name doesn’t sound familiar.
Of course, there’s Mrs. Miller at the post office.
Any connection?
No, no connection.
Heyward Miller and his wife
moved into the old Yunker place about eight, nine years ago.
At that time, his wife was expecting a baby...
but she took sick and died a couple of months later.
And after her death,
he sold the place to the Crawfords and went back to the city.
Does that help you remember, Mrs. Parch?
Oh, yes. Miller, that awful man.
How could I ever forget about him?
I thought you’d remember, Mrs. Parch.
I-- I mean, after all that’s happened between you.
He was a mighty disturbed man, the way I heard the story.
Of course, I wasn’t living in the county at the time,
so I don’t know the whole truth,
and it’s not my place to pass along any opinions.
The man was a fool,
a fool and a gambler and heaven knows what else.
You ask anybody about him, Sheriff.
He just didn’t belong out here.
Could we talk about what happened, Mrs. Parch?
I haven’t thought about it for years,
but I remember the whole thing as if it were yesterday.
And do you know something?
I knew that man was no good even before I laid eyes on him.
It was about a month after he moved to the neighborhood.
I was on the phone, talking to poor Mrs. Anderson.
Hello, Gertrude? Did I call you at a bad time?
Oh, hello, Helen. No, it’s all right. I was just setting my hair.
[Mrs. Parch] Did you try the recipe yet?
Yes, It’s in the oven right now,
but it looks kind of funny. It’s all soggy in the middle.
Did you do like I said, with the six eggs and everything?
Yes, I think I beat in six eggs.
Or... was it five?
It’s just a matter of practice.
When Fred was alive, he used to tell me that I was the best--
[man] For Pete’s sake, are you two still on that phone?
Who’s that?
My name is Miller.
I share this line, in case you don’t know it,
and I got as much right to it as you do.
How dare you talk to us this way?
I’ve got a good mind to complain to the phone company.
Go on, complain. I got a few things I could tell them myself.
Look, lady,
I don’t mean to give you a hard time,
but I got an important call to make, a business call.
You can certainly wait your turn.
I picked up the phone an hour ago and you were on it.
I tried again a half an hour ago, and somebody else was yakking.
Now I try again and you got cakes in the oven.
Just when does my turn come, huh?
Patience is a virtue, Mr. Miller.
Or didn’t they teach you that?
Look, this can’t wait.
If I don’t make this call now,
the whole deal could fall through.
I’ll only be a couple of minutes.
Then you can talk your little heads off.
Oh, dear.
Well, all right.
-Gertrude? -Yes, Helen?
I’ll call you back later, dear.
Yes.
All right, Mr. Miller.
You can go ahead now.
Yeah, Stanley, put me down for ten bucks
on Buffalo Gal in the fifth race, hmm?
And about that sixth race...
I got a hunch. Starmont.
[cash register dings]
$3.60 out of $10.
There you are. How’s the wife?
She’s still in bed.
Oh, that’s too bad.
Happens that way sometimes with the first one.
Wait till the fifth or sixth. Won’t be so bad then.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guess it won’t be too long before you’re buying diapers,
huh, Mr. Miller?
Did you say "Miller"?
That’s right.
Are you the one who made that business call yesterday
on the party line?
Yeah, I made a call.
Well, I certainly hope that Buffalo Gal won the race, Mr. Miller.
What was that?
I’m Mrs. Parch.
You’re on our party line, Mr. Miller.
And the next time you have an important business call to make,
I hope you’ll have the decency to be more patient.
And the next time, Mrs. Parch,
I hope you’ll have the decency
to keep your big, long, snoopy nose
out of my business.
Well!
[clerk] I have some scraps for your cat, Mrs. Parch.
I’ve been saving them for you.
That’ll be fine, Mr. Maynard.
Just imagine, two games in a row.
Now, you know me, Gertrude.
I hardly ever win anything. [giggles]
When Mr. Willard called that G-25, I could’ve plain died.
I wish I had your luck, Helen.
Hmm. I wouldn’t say it’s much luck.
It’s just a matter of patience.
After all, you know, I’ve been going to these bingo games ever since--
-[Miller] Get off the line. -What?
You got to get off the line. I’ve got to call a doctor.
Who is this? Mr. Miller?
Get off, do you hear? My wife’s sick, she’s terribly sick.
Mm-hmm.
I’ll just bet she is, Mr. Miller.
Get off the line!
Pay no attention to him, Gertrude.
We’re on to his tricks, aren’t we?
Get off! She could die if I don’t get a doctor.
Can’t you understand?
Helen, do you really think--
Pay him no mind, Gertrude.
No mind at all.
After all, you just have to treat people
the way they deserve to be treated.
That’s the golden rule.
Look, Mrs. Parch, I apologize.
This isn’t a bet, I promise you.
You can listen in if you don’t believe me.
I have to have a doctor. Please!
Would you like to know what happened to Heyward Miller?
It really makes no difference to me.
It might, Mrs. Parch.
After Miller left town, he returned to the city
and to his old way of life.
It wasn’t a very good way.
A couple of years later he was arrested on a charge of burglary.
There.
Didn’t I tell you I was a good judge of people?
[he groans]
You told me.
Anyway, he’s been in prison for the past six years.
Yesterday, we got word that he escaped.
-Escaped? -That’s right.
He got out in the laundry truck.
We got the news late last night,
but it’s been over a week since it happened.
It was the prison psychiatrist
who thought of notifying our office here in Milford.
Notifying you? But why?
They don’t know anything for sure,
but there is a chance he might be headed this way.
To kill you, Mrs. Parch.
Kill me?
You think Miller wants to kill me?
Let’s get this straight, Mrs. Parch.
We don’t know anything for sure.
We don’t know his whereabouts,
and we’re not certain he’s actually headed in this direction.
Well, then why do you say--
It was the prison psychiatrist
who decided we should be notified.
In his talks with Miller,
he discovered that Miller still blames you for the death of his wife.
You and that Mrs. Anderson you were talking to.
She’s gone.
Poor Gertrude passed on five years ago.
You’re the only one left, eh, Mrs. Parch?
The only one he can blame.
You know, it’s a strange thing about men in prison.
If they’ve got a grudge against somebody,
they nurse it and cherish it.
It gives them something to hold on to.
You see what I mean?
No.
More often than not...
a man gets out of jail,
and the grudge isn’t important anymore.
He doesn’t need it.
But in Miller’s case...
well, Miller’s different.
For one thing, he’s escaped.
He’s dangerous.
But it was all so long ago.
I just can’t believe that...
The prison’s almost 200 miles from here.
Of course, there’s a possibility
that he could have hitched a ride as far as here.
We just wanted to warn you, Mrs. Parch, that’s all.
But I’m all alone here!
He could murder me in my sleep!
You’ve got to protect me. You’ve got to!
We’re doing everything we can, Mrs. Parch.
We got a three-state alarm out for Miller.
We’ll catch him soon.
You’ve got to give me protection!
Can’t you send someone out here to stay with me? A policeman?
-It’s not possible. -Not possible?
What do you mean, "not possible"? I demand it!
-I absolutely demand it! -Believe me, Mrs. Parch.
We want to help, but there are some things we can’t do.
We only have a couple of men.
We can’t possibly assign one full-time to you.
What will I do?
What will I do?
If you could get a neighbor to come on over
and stay with you for a few days,
or else go visit a relative.
It might be a good idea for your own peace of mind.
I... have a sister.
In Cedar Falls.
Well, that sounds good.
I’m sure your sister would be glad to see you.
Hmm... you don’t know Daisy.
I haven’t seen her for ten years.
We just never got along.
There’s always a good time for a reconciliation, isn’t there, Mrs. Parch?
Listen, I-- I didn’t come out here just to frighten you.
There’s nothing definite about this.
Nothing at all.
If we hear anything further, we’ll get in touch right away.
That’s a nice-looking pooch you’ve got there.
Is he a good watchdog?
I suppose so.
I don’t want you to worry too much about this, Mrs. Parch.
He’s probably a hundred miles away.
And we’ll be keeping an eye on your place. Remember that.
I will.
[phone ringing]
[ringing]
[ringing]
Hello?
Helen? It’s Betty Nubbins.
How are you, dear?
I’m just fine.
That’s good.
Um, are you going to the bingo game tomorrow?
I really don’t know.
Oh, you just must, Helen. It wouldn’t be any fun without you.
[chuckles]
Say, didn’t I see a car in your driveway just now?
Maybe you did and maybe you didn’t.
Oh, I could have sworn I saw a car.
It wasn’t Mr. Willard, was it?
No, it wasn’t Mr. Willard.
Oh, well, then who was it, dear?
For heaven’s sakes, Betty,
when are you going to learn to mind your own business?
Well!
[phone ringing]
Hello, Emma? Well!
What do you think of our friend now?
Isn’t that terrible!
Imagine her talking to you that way!
As if she has the right to talk about minding your own business!
Why, I bet she’s listened to every call for the last 12 years!
Oh, Betty!
What if she’s listening in right now?
I hope she is. That’s all I can say.
It’s about time she learned the truth about herself.
Who do you suppose that man was?
The one that came to see her?
Probably the man from the finance company.
The way she spends money,
it’s a wonder they haven’t repossessed the whole house by now.
Did you see that dress she bought over in Milford?
I wouldn’t wear it to a hayride,
but I’ll swear it must’ve cost $25!
You nasty old busybodies!
Why, Helen!
Don’t you have anything better to do?
Don’t you ever get off of the phone and do any work?
Well, look who’s calling who a busybody!
Why, you’re nothing but an eavesdropper, Helen Parch!
[hangs up phone]
[barking]
[flips light switch]
Who’s there?
Is anybody down there?
I’m warning you.
I’ve got a mighty vicious dog here.
If there’s anybody down there, you better watch out.
[cat meowing]
[screams]
-[dog barking] -Nero! Come back here!
Oh, that awful Nubbins’ cat. Leave it alone, Nero.
Nero!
Nero!
-[cat hissing] -[dog barking]
Nero!
You come home, you bad dog!
You hear me? Come back!
I’ve got to get a hold of myself.
[phone ringing]
Nasty old busybodies...
[barking]
Nero.
Come back, Nero!
Don’t leave Mother all alone.
[thud]
Nero?
Is that you?
[groans]
[Emma] So naturally, I told Harry to take it right back to the store.
Please. Get off the phone!
-[Betty] Who’s that? -Helen!
It’s Helen. For heaven’s sakes, Betty, get off the line.
I have to call the police!
The police?
Whatever for?
I don’t have time to explain now.
I have to call the sheriff’s office.
Well, if it isn’t our old friend, Mrs. Eavesdropper.
What’s the matter, Helen? Don’t you have anything better to do?
Get off! Get off the phone or I’ll be killed!
[laughs] Now who’d want to kill you, Helen?
Oh, you must be having nightmares.
I thought you were going to be putting up preserves today, Helen.
Are you sure it wasn’t a little hard cider?
Please, get off of the phone.
Well, some people just don’t know that patience is a virtue.
Isn’t that right, Emma?
[Emma] It certainly is.
Please, please, I beg of you...
[Betty] Pay her no mind, no mind at all.
What were you saying?
Well, as the Germans say...
[speaks in German]
There is no accounting for taste.
Oddly enough, Mr. Miller was punished very severely for his crime.
Apparently, the sheriff shared the same party line
and overheard the whole thing.
Next time, I plan a return visit to your living room.
If you aren’t going to be home,
please leave the television set on, so I can come on in.
Until then, goodnight.
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