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®Hon3yHD.com!®
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- (siren wails)
- Ash Williams, you're under arrest
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for the murder of Amber Corey.
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- Baal: Shh.
- There's a demon in here.
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He's hidden among us.
He could be in any one of you.
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I got a problem.
What if I'm Baal?
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- (screaming)
- Wait, wait, wait!
7
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You're not thinking straight.
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Ruby: Baal gets into people's psyches,
turning them against each other,
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- until they annihilate themselves.
- Thomas, this isn't you.
10
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- Don't you ever shut the fuck up?!
" (gasps)
11
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- Linda: It's over!
- Hey, toots. Come to Daddy.
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I'm going to send you back to hell
where you belong.
13
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And how exactly?
14
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The Necronomicon is gone,
and I'm up here.
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(gasping, retching)
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- Is that Sumerian?
- I told you I'm him.
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No, Pablo. You're not Baal.
You're our only hope of stopping him.
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(cat screeches)
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(Pablo groaning, panting)
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Never seen this before.
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The Book of the Dead
festering inside a live human body.
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- That's good, right? No?
- Ash.
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- (barking)
- (electricity buzzing)
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What's happening?!
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- Pablo?
- (roaring)
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- Oh, my God.
- Pablo?
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Come on, buddy,
quit fooling around.
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You're scaring me--
uh-uh, these people.
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Oh, no.
30
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Kelly:
Ash, what's wrong with him?
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- (whispers) Ash?
- Pablo?
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Buddy.
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- (gasps)
- (both scream)
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(music playing)
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Where the hell is he?!
He's a murderer!
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- (crowd clamoring)
- You're supposed to protect this town.
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You let this guy come back
and do all this right under your nose?!
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- Now listen to me.
- I want justice for my daughter!
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Justice for Amber!
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(slow motion yelling)
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It's hard, isn't it?
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Resisting the urge to shoot
that vile woman in the head.
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- (slow motion yelling continues)
- (electricity buzzing)
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I don't blame you.
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Make these people respect you,
not think of you as the guy
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who lost his town
and his wife to Ash Williams.
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(chuckfing)
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(crowd screaming)
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(yelling)
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Who are you?
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Well, uh, just like that hooker
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you saw in Detroit last summer?
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(Baal's voice) I can be
whoever you want me to be, sugar.
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(gasps)
Oh, Jesus.
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Well, the Son of God might be
a stretch, but you get the point.
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What's happening?
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(slow motion yelling)
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- I just want my family back.
- Oh.
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Yeah, well, here's the thing.
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I could take her out,
or you could take her out.
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It doesn't really matter.
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We both know that she's not
the one that you want, so...
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- What are you going to do about it?
- Ash Williams is a murderer!
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What are you going to do about it?!
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(yelling continues)
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(indistinct whispering)
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Can't you just cut it out of me?
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Doesn't work like that.
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It's not like there's
a physical book inside you.
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It's more like you're becoming
one with the book.
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Like a spiritual convergence.
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Wait a minute,
this convergence,
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once it happens,
what does that mean for Pablo?
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Once the book
manifests completely,
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there'll be no Pablo.
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That's a nay-no.
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- Look, Ash, I understand--
- Do I need to spell it out to you?
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It's a nay-no on no-Pablo.
Are we clear?
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Just so you're clear,
the Necronomicon is the only way
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we can banish Baal
back to the underworld.
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Nuh-uh, I got a plan for Baal,
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and it doesn't involve recycling Pablo
into some stupid book.
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I'm going to find him, take my chainsaw,
shove it right up his ass.
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He is never going to
show his face to you.
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Even if you do somehow manage
to find him, he'll just jump bodies.
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(chuckles)
Way ahead of you.
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You see that?
That's a pet tracker.
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I got that 'cause Eli
kept getting into my weed stash
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and wandering around my trailer.
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All I got to do is find Baal once,
shove this down his throat.
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That way,
even if he sheds his skin,
92
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:09,371
I can still find him,
take my chainsaw...
93
00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:11,284
And shove it right up Baal's ass?
94
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:12,851
You're like the daughter I never had.
95
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Your chainsaw is never
going to stop Baal,
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00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:18,324
no matter where you shove it.
97
00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:20,164
But there may be a way.
98
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If we can allow the convergence
to continue a little longer,
99
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I can isolate the right passage
to cast Baal back.
100
00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:29,365
Uh, okay.
101
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So maybe we can add your thing
on top of my great pet tracker plan.
102
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We get Pablo right up close,
he does his voodoo,
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and, well, the rest
will just fall into place.
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- Don't overthink it.
- Guys, Pablo's going to be...
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- fine.
- Get him up to my room.
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Do not kill Pablo.
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And don't get any of that crap
on my stuff.
108
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Linda, I made a promise to you,
so I'm going to go out now
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and find your ex-husband?
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Thank you, Ash.
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Despite everything that's happened,
I still want to make sure he's okay.
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Yeah, yeah, me too.
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Listen, don't worry
about a thing, okay?
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You're safe here, I promise.
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Woman:
Murderer! Get out!
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Man:
Go back to where you came from!
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- (crowd yelling)
- Man: Get the hell out of here!
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Woman:
Our children are dead!
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Man: Take your evil and go!
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Well, I found him.
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Thomas is out there?
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- What the hell is he doing?
- Ooh, I wouldn't do that.
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- We're good.
- Lacey, go wait for me upstairs.
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- (feedback sounding)
- Emery: Ash Williams!
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You've been ordered to surrender yourself
into my custody right now!
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- (crowd yelling)
- Thomas? Why are you doing this?
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You saw what Ash did.
You know he's protecting us.
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(yelling continues)
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All I know is if he doesn't
come out willingly,
130
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we're coming in there
to drag him out!
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- You hear me, Williams?!
- Okay, we cannot let this crowd in here
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to screw up whatever
Ruby's doing with Pablo.
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- I got an idea.
- (gun cocks)
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You want Ash?!
135
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Well, you fuckwads better know
how to walk through lead!
136
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Okay, so, I just fired a gun
at a crowd of civilians.
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Yeah, that's like a felony.
138
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- Hey, what-- what-what's that for?
- Protection.
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I'm sorry, how is salt
meant to protect him?
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It's not, it's meant
to protect us from him.
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Don't worry,
everything is going to be fine.
142
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It's just a precaution.
Right?
143
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I'm going to use an incantation
to accelerate the convergence.
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It's going to hurt
a lot more than this, isn't it?
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It'll be over quickly.
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(crowd yelling)
147
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Back off now,
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or I will fuck your faces with bullets!
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- Too much?
- I totally bought it.
150
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- (glass shattering)
- (thudding upstairs)
151
00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:23,204
Sounds like they're trying
to break in upstairs.
152
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- I'm good down here.
- (gun cocks)
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Okay, I'll be right back.
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(faint breathing)
155
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- (breathing increases)
- (heartbeat)
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(floorboards creaking)
157
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(breathing continues)
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(Ruby speaking foreign language)
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(speaking foreign language)
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(groaning)
161
00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:06,122
(faint growling)
162
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(screaming)
163
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Stay strong, Pablo!
164
00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:14,567
It feels like my skin
is going to explode!
165
00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:16,563
(Ruby continues
speaking foreign language)
166
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(door slams)
167
00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:26,282
(speaking foreign language)
168
00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:35,162
It looks like something's not right.
By that pendant.
169
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(gasping, groaning)
170
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Please! Please!
You have to stop this!
171
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Pablo, I need to take that pendant.
172
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- (electricity zapping)
- (snarling)
173
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- (distorted screaming)
- Fuck.
174
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(speaking in Sumerian)
175
00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,731
(floorboards creaking)
176
00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:27,769
(voice whispers "Ash")
177
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,680
(creaking)
178
00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:39,763
(yelling in Sumerian)
179
00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:42,848
(screaming)
180
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,566
(panting)
181
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:56,883
Pablo. Oh, my God.
182
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,890
(door creaking)
183
00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:07,682
(crowd shouting outside)
184
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,480
- Ah!
- Both: Oh!
185
00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:30,721
- Chet!
- Hey!
186
00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:33,167
- What are you doing in here?!
- Uh...
187
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,567
nothing.
188
00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:42,730
(wind howling)
189
00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:46,290
(growling, snarling)
190
00:11:46,440 --> 00:11:48,807
- (rumbling)
- Uh, Chet?
191
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:50,803
- Yeah?
- We should get out of here.
192
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,042
Right.
193
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:54,964
(growling)
194
00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:58,602
Move your butt, Chet!
195
00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:03,003
- You okay?
- Yeah.
196
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:05,926
They have the book.
197
00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:08,122
- (wind howling)
- (wind chimes clinking)
198
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,201
(voice whispers "Ash")
199
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:52,123
What the hell
were you doing in that room?
200
00:12:52,280 --> 00:12:55,124
Dude, there's a huge mob
coming for you.
201
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:56,281
I came to warn you!
202
00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:59,250
What were you doing
in Cheryl's room with her stuff?
203
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:03,527
Oh, wait!
Is that Cheryl's room?
204
00:13:03,680 --> 00:13:05,523
- (Ash scoffs)
- Woman: Ash?
205
00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:10,488
Ashley?
206
00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:24,686
(door creaking)
207
00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:27,130
Ash: Cheryl?
208
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:29,049
- Cheryl.
- Cheryl?
209
00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:32,403
Ash? Is that you?
210
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:33,846
I'm scared.
211
00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:37,362
Yeah. It's me, Cheryl.
212
00:13:39,160 --> 00:13:41,447
How'd you get here, sis?
213
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:45,571
I don't know.
I-l don't understand any of this.
214
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:48,490
Where's Dad?
215
00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:53,091
Urn... Dad's not here right now.
216
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:57,040
Well, you look different.
What happened to you?
217
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:00,560
Pancakes?
218
00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:03,007
Chet?
219
00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:05,401
- Chet Kaminski?!
- Yep.
220
00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:07,688
You're all grown up.
221
00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:09,365
Oh.
222
00:14:09,520 --> 00:14:11,727
Well, uh, you look pretty good, too.
223
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,247
Hate to rain on anybody's parade,
but, Cheryl,
224
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,448
you're not supposed to be here.
225
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:21,446
You died after you got branch-banged
by a demon tree about 30 years ago.
226
00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,648
- I died?
- Yeah.
227
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:25,729
It was pretty horrific.
228
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:27,410
You don't remember any of that?
229
00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:30,689
Seems like the kind of thing
somebody would remember.
230
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:33,969
Oh, wait.
231
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:37,730
Wait, I-I think... Oh...
232
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:40,451
Oh, it's all coming back to me now.
233
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:43,123
- (both yell)
"(Cheryl snarling)
234
00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:50,566
(evil laughter)
235
00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:54,961
- (crowd shouting outside)
- Linda: Uh, Kelly...
236
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:58,164
- you need to see this.
- Man: Everybody got something?
237
00:14:58,320 --> 00:14:59,526
Audry:
Come here! Come on!
238
00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:02,081
Ash Williams murdered
our sons and daughters,
239
00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:05,005
- and now we make him pay!
- Crowd: Yeah!
240
00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:09,449
- Anybody gets in your way, kill them!
- Crowd: Yeah!
241
00:15:09,600 --> 00:15:11,011
Shit!
242
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,810
Ah! Get down!
243
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:15,530
- (gunshots)
- (both yelling)
244
00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:22,001
- They're trying to kill us!
- You ever shoot a gun before?
245
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:23,969
What? We're not going to
try to kill them, are we?
246
00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,168
Unfortunately no.
247
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,681
We just got to keep them at bay
as long as we can, okay?
248
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:30,001
_ y? " Yes!
249
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,208
Go!
250
00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:39,207
(evil laughter)
251
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:42,842
- (gunshots continue)
- Ash: Chet!
252
00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:45,121
Ah!
253
00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,886
(distorted)
Just you and me now, Chet.
254
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:54,041
I ...as his bride ♪
255
00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:55,486
(chuckfing)
256
00:15:56,880 --> 00:15:58,962
I missed you, baby!
257
00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:01,282
♪ I might like you better
if we slept together ♪
258
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:06,008
- ♪ I might like you better... ♪
- Oh, my baby's got a boo-boo.
259
00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:08,481
- Uh, I don't have a-- have a boo-boo.
- Oh, gee.
260
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:13,247
This doesn't feel
half as good as it used to.
261
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:15,721
- (Deadite Cheryl bites)
- (screams)
262
00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:17,530
♪ I might like you better
if we slept together... ♪
263
00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:19,409
What else you got for me, big boy?
264
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:21,164
Noth...
265
00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:22,446
- I-l don't have anything.
- Ooh.
266
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:25,524
- What, there's nothing!
- (chainsaw revving)
267
00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,840
Sorry, sis, playtime's over.
268
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:36,411
Fine!
269
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:40,042
Then I'm going to make like a tree,
and fuck you!
270
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:41,690
- (Deadite Cheryl snarling)
- Whoa!
271
00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:51,050
You're still a lousy dancer!
272
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:55,807
- You're still a bitch!
- (chainsaw buzzing)
273
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,607
- (song fades)
- (evil laughter)
274
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:07,684
Deadite Cheryl:
(whispering) Ashy...
275
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:10,121
want to play a game?
276
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,442
Come on, Ashy.
277
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:14,443
It'll be fun.
278
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:16,284
Your game sucks ass, Cheryl.
279
00:17:16,440 --> 00:17:18,442
Deadite Cheryl:
That's because you're still a loser.
280
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:20,449
Like you always were!
281
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,722
Oh, yeah?
282
00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,047
Deadite Cheryl: Warm.
283
00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:28,089
Warm.
284
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,891
- (gun cocks)
- Warmer.
285
00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:33,327
- (clatters)
- Whoa!
286
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:34,925
Take it easy, man.
Take it easy.
287
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:37,208
L-I never touched her, I swear.
288
00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:38,964
I would never betray you like that.
289
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:40,161
- (Chet zipping pants)
- Okay, fine.
290
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:41,810
Just stay here,
I'll deal with Cheryl.
291
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,361
Cool, um, I'll just, uh,
wait in your room.
292
00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,000
Don't!
Don't go in there, it's not safe.
293
00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:48,730
You stay here
and do a bunch of nothing.
294
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,969
Deadite Cheryl:
Come and get me, Ash! (cackling)
295
00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:02,449
(all screaming)
296
00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:04,005
Ugh! Damn it!
297
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:07,130
We are eating a giant
shit sandwich right now.
298
00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:11,410
Are you good down here for a minute
while I try and unfuck the situation?
299
00:18:11,560 --> 00:18:13,528
I got it. Go.
300
00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:19,887
- Where have you been?
- (whispers) Shut up.
301
00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:23,089
- Emery: Lay down your weapons!
- Family reunion. My sister, Cheryl.
302
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:26,244
- What?
- Yeah, I killed her decades ago.
303
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,402
Now she's back.
I got to find her, and kill her again.
304
00:18:28,560 --> 00:18:30,483
Wait, she came back
but now you've lost her?
305
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:32,210
Focus up.
We got to find Cheryl.
306
00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:34,010
Hey, why don't you deal
with your dead sister
307
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:36,447
while I stop your inbred,
asshole neighbors
308
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,329
from busting in
and lynching you!
309
00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:41,006
- Huh, hey.
- Emery: Ash!
310
00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:44,642
Ruby, shit's gone so sideways
it's basically upside down.
311
00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,201
Have you found the spell--
312
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:50,762
- What did you do to him?
- It's working.
313
00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,091
- This is "working"?
- I've accelerated the process,
314
00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,284
but we can't control
when the specific spell will manifest.
315
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,204
Bullshit, you can't.
316
00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:03,283
Pablo, listen up.
317
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,442
You might be converging
with the book or whatever,
318
00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:08,251
but you are still
a fucking Ghost Beater.
319
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:09,731
You call the shots,
320
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,326
not some glorified,
demonic romance novel.
321
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,361
- You hear me?
- Yeah.
322
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:18,808
I said, do you hear me?
323
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:22,171
I got this.
324
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,641
There's my powerful vagina.
325
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,567
What do we do
when the spell appears?
326
00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:31,485
Put this back on him.
It'll halt any further convergence.
327
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:34,967
Pablo, quit fucking around.
328
00:19:35,120 --> 00:19:38,124
Find the spell we need
to send this asshole home.
329
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:45,168
(groaning)
330
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:51,366
It's coming.
331
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:57,242
(crowd shouting outside)
332
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,848
(electricity buzzing)
333
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,485
(sighs)
334
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:19,731
- (gasps)
- (glass shatters)
335
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,242
(train horn blows)
336
00:20:48,120 --> 00:20:49,690
(train horn blows)
337
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,161
- (Deadite Cheryl laughing maniacally)
- (Ash yells)
338
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:58,608
Deadite Cheryl: Ooh, found me!
339
00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:00,762
I don't want to play with that!
340
00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:03,366
- (Ash grunts)
- (horn blows)
341
00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:05,488
I want to play with this!
342
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,642
- (buzzing)
- (Deadite Cheryl continues laughing)
343
00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:13,205
(wailing)
344
00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,850
(demonic voice
speaking in foreign language)
345
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:23,650
(all screaming)
346
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:25,763
(gasping)
347
00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,007
(man vocalizing)
348
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:34,170
It worked.
Now we have the spell to defeat Baal.
349
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:35,890
- Oh!
- What's wrong?
350
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:39,487
(panting)
It's an old wound.
351
00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:41,688
All right, well, do your voodoo,
and heal yourself.
352
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,889
- I don't do that anymore.
- What are talking about, Ruby?
353
00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:47,407
Wolverine that shit back together.
We don't have time.
354
00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:49,881
I mean I can't.
355
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,569
My children stole my immortality.
356
00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:57,564
Don't look at me like that.
I don't want your sympathy.
357
00:21:57,720 --> 00:21:59,927
(wails)
358
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:03,004
Deadite Cheryl: Come on, Ash!
We got to brush those teeth!
359
00:22:16,360 --> 00:22:18,044
' (grunts)
- 0h!
360
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,726
(softly) Chet, you idiot.
I told you to wait upstairs.
361
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:23,008
Chill, I'm just looking for a beer.
362
00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:26,442
Oh, relax!
Just want one.
363
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:28,090
You can pound the other five.
364
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:30,089
- Oh!
- You're going to have to go through him
365
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:33,602
- to get to me. (cackling)
- No way.
366
00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:36,923
Throughout everything,
Chet is the only friend of mine
367
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:39,009
- who always stood by me.
- Oh.
368
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:41,606
Never lied to me,
never let me down,
369
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:44,047
never, ever, betrayed me.
370
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,407
Uh, Ash,
I should probably tell you...
371
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:50,360
- It's okay, pal. Me, too.
- Aw, you guys!
372
00:22:50,520 --> 00:22:52,807
So sweet!
373
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,684
Too bad, 'cause if you
won't go through him...
374
00:22:56,840 --> 00:22:58,410
I will!
375
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:00,762
No, no! Chet!
376
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:03,207
~ 0h!
' (beating)
377
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:06,882
- (Chet gasping)
- (evil laughter)
378
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:09,963
- No!
- (Deadite Cheryl shrieks)
379
00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:11,485
(gasps)
380
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:14,769
Oh, no.
381
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,365
- (snarls)
- (gun clicks)
382
00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:25,329
- Shit!
- You're next.
383
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:29,610
- (crowd screaming)
- Woman: Oh, my God!
384
00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,881
(crowd yelling)
385
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:38,527
- I believe you've been looking for me.
- Woman: Shoot him!
386
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,250
Man: What are you waiting for?
Shoot him!
387
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:42,687
Let's get one thing straight, yo-yos,
388
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,446
I kill demons, not people.
389
00:23:45,600 --> 00:23:46,726
- (crowd jeering)
- Bullshit!
390
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:49,884
Unless those people are demons
who look like people.
391
00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:54,011
And then I kill people, but they're
not really people, they're demons.
392
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:55,361
- You understand?
- (crowd shouting)
393
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:57,807
In a minute, I'll prove it.
394
00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:02,851
- Man: Come on!
- Man #2: He's full of it!
395
00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:07,204
Yep, any minute now.
396
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,721
Man: What are we waiting for?
Just shoot him!
397
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,645
Hang in there.
It's going to be worth it.
398
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,891
- (crowd gasping)
- Man: It's moving.
399
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:24,283
Chowderheads of Elk Grove,
meet my sister, Cheryl.
400
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:27,051
Cheryl, meet the chowderheads.
401
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,521
Woman: It can't be!
Man: No, no, she's dead!
402
00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:31,409
Exactly. Hey, sis.
403
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:32,971
(snarling)
404
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:37,049
(crowd screaming)
405
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:40,486
Wait for it...
406
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:44,324
- (snarling)
- (crowd gasping)
407
00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,800
(gasping)
408
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:03,801
Woman: She's still standing!
409
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,851
- (all gasping, screaming)
- You can't stop us.
410
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,082
We'll kill you all.
411
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:11,605
Oh, my God! She's a demon.
412
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:14,411
- Yep, told you so.
- Man: Do something!
413
00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:17,404
- Woman: Oh, please, Ash!
- Man: Help us!
414
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:19,847
- (crowd screaming)
- Okay, let's show 'em what a hero does.
415
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,923
(buzzing)
416
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:25,044
Hey, Cheryl, remember the time
we played hide-and-seek?
417
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:27,851
I hid in the trunk of the car, and you
locked me in, wouldn't let me out?
418
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:29,565
(chuckles)
Remember that?
419
00:25:29,720 --> 00:25:32,166
- So do I.
- (Deadite Cheryl yells)
420
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:34,846
(crowd gasping)
421
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:39,566
- (gasping)
- (snarling)
422
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:46,090
And that, Elk Grove,
is how you take care of business.
423
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:48,641
Well, Cheryl,
it's been fun catching up.
424
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:50,928
Sorry I got to kill you.
425
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:52,971
Again.
426
00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:54,884
- (buzzing)
- (screaming)
427
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,482
I hope we all
learned something today.
428
00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:13,011
(Deadite Cheryl groans)
429
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:15,162
Not again.
430
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,051
(cheering)
431
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,762
- Ash, behind you!
- What's that?
432
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:37,329
So you're Baal?
433
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,484
Good,
because I'm carving you up next.
434
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:43,564
Shh.
435
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,808
(Baal's voice)
Let's stop arguing.
436
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:54,925
Wouldn't it be much easier
to work together?
437
00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:10,487
Shh.
438
00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:14,927
♪ They're coming
to take me away, ha-ha I
439
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:17,048
♪ They're coming to
take me away, ho-ho ♪
440
00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:19,282
♪ Hee-hee, ha-ha,
to the funny farm ♪
441
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,681
♪ Where life is beautiful
all the time ♪
442
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:25,401
♪ And I'll be happy to see those nice
young men in their clean, white coats ♪
443
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:28,882
♪ And they're coming
to take me away, ha-ha I
444
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,209
♪ You thought it was a joke I
445
00:27:32,360 --> 00:27:34,010
♪ And so you laughed,
you laughed I
446
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:37,801
♪ When I had said that losing you
would make me flip my lid ♪
447
00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:39,291
R Right? r
448
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:41,727
♪ You know you laughed,
I heard you laugh ♪
449
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:44,565
♪ You laughed, you laughed,
and laughed, and then you left ♪
450
00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,161
♪ But now you know
I'm utterly mad ♪
451
00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:50,802
♪ And they're coming
to take me away, ha-ha I
452
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:52,962
♪ They're coming to
take me away, ho-ho ♪
453
00:27:53,120 --> 00:27:55,202
♪ Hee-hee, ha-ha,
to the happy home ♪
454
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,448
♪ With trees and flowers
and chirping birds ♪
455
00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,443
♪ And basket weavers,
who sit and smile ♪
456
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:01,284
♪ And twiddle their thumbs and toes I
457
00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:04,842
♪ And they're coming
to take me away, ha-ha I
458
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:12,525
Created by: A. Vandelay
Post Haste Digital
33870
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