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1
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[indistinct chatter]
2
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Oh, my God. What happened?
3
00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:21,520
A little warning from The Dean.
4
00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:24,200
How's it coming with the money?
We've only got two weeks left.
5
00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:28,120
Yep, we're on target,
it's the final push but, erm...
6
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[whispers] we're low on stock.
7
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-Of what?
-Everything.
8
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:36,840
-Even crack?
-It's our best seller.
9
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:40,080
Professionals, clubbers,
students, they love it.
10
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,000
Yeah. It can get you like that.
11
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,040
Okay, so how do we replenish stock?
12
00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:47,400
You need some
fresh ingredients and a cook.
13
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:49,920
I'll arrange it.
14
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,600
Well done.
15
00:00:51,680 --> 00:00:52,960
I'm impressed.
16
00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:58,480
[Hanies] The Brook Hill crew is nominally
run by this man, Christian Taylor.
17
00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:01,520
Taylor is currently inside
for violating the terms of his probation.
18
00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:04,720
-So who's in charge now, his lieutenants?
-[exhales] Unclear.
19
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:06,000
Souljah's gone to ground,
20
00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:08,120
and Spider was shot
and injured by persons unknown.
21
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:09,480
-Have you spoken to him?
-We have.
22
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:11,560
He's still so weak, he could
barely answer our questions,
23
00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:12,640
let alone run any kind of crew.
24
00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:14,280
Do we know how Brook Hill is structured?
25
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:16,280
Like most local crews,
we think they've got a network
26
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:18,920
of foot soldiers
who are young and highly mobile.
27
00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:22,040
[dramatic music playing]
28
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[Margaret] I thought
I might go and see mum later.
29
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Oh! Well, say hi from me.
30
00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:33,560
You could come, she'd like that.
31
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Normally I'd be in like Flynn,
but sadly, I got a thing.
32
00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:38,960
Do you not feel like you owe Mum a visit?
33
00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:42,560
Absolutely.
It's on my list. Right at the top.
34
00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:49,600
[Haines] Brook Hill is plugged
into the local community,
35
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:52,840
but we believe they have ties
to this major London player, The Dean.
36
00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:54,840
Well, that means Brook Hill
has to get profits back to London,
37
00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:56,480
which means a bagman. Any leads?
38
00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:58,920
Not yet, but The Dean's been
at the top level for years,
39
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:02,000
so anyone moving money for him
will be one slick operator.
40
00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:04,440
I don't like broccoli.
41
00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:07,000
You can't live entirely
off tangy cheese Doritos.
42
00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:08,880
You need fruit and veg in your diet
if you want to love again.
43
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,120
Why?
44
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,920
Right. Supposing you go round
to Anne-Marie's house
45
00:02:12,040 --> 00:02:15,160
-and she's made you a nice salad?
-I'll just pretend to have a stroke.
46
00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:17,160
How about...
47
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,040
-an olive?
-Oh, fuck off!
48
00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:22,160
[Selforth] We've identified
a kid, Carter, 17,
49
00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,000
we know he's running for Brook Hill.
50
00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:26,720
We need four plainclothes
in one week to run surveillance on him.
51
00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:28,080
No. I don't have the manpower.
52
00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:29,520
Sir, if we sit on this kid
for long enough,
53
00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:31,160
whoever's running Brook Hill
will show their face.
54
00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:32,360
Two people, 48 hours.
55
00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:33,600
Three people, 72 hours.
56
00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:36,680
Fine. But I want pictures
on my desk in three days.
57
00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:40,600
[Malaki] You better watch yourself.
58
00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:42,680
The Feds was here
asking about The Dean.
59
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,920
They know someone's running my end,
60
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:46,680
so look sharp.
61
00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:47,880
Okay.
62
00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:51,760
You gotta leave right now?
63
00:02:52,920 --> 00:02:54,160
Yeah? What?
64
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:58,240
If you go, I gotta go back
to my cell and talk to Hank,
65
00:02:58,320 --> 00:03:01,600
and he ain't exactly
Graham Norton, you know?
66
00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:05,480
Can we-- can we just talk?
67
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:09,520
Okay. What do you wanna talk about?
68
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:10,640
[Malaki] Anything.
69
00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:13,840
Why did you become a drug dealer?
70
00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:15,120
The pension plan.
71
00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:17,120
Aren't you scared of getting hurt?
72
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:20,600
My dad never broke the law once.
73
00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:22,960
He was a welder all his life.
74
00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:25,880
What did he get
for all his honest, hard work?
75
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:27,840
Chronic lung disease from the fumes.
76
00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:31,120
Why didn't you stay in school,
get an education?
77
00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:34,120
If your family couldn't afford
to put food on the table
78
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,160
and someone offered you
a chance to make money,
79
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:37,560
what would you choose?
80
00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:40,000
Dealing, or double maths?
81
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:43,080
[theme music playing]
82
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:19,800
[Claire] Following an extensive
community needs assessment,
83
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:23,360
we have a strategy that's in line
with the city's economic action plan.
84
00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:24,640
Slide.
85
00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,560
When I say slide, Susie,
jump to the next slide.
86
00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:29,240
[Myrna] What are you doing?
87
00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:30,640
Prepping for the Town Hall tonight.
88
00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:32,640
You can stand down, love.
I'll be doing the talking.
89
00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:34,240
You don't know how to work PowerPoint!
90
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:36,680
We don't need slides, we need passion!
91
00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,240
This isn't rabblerousing.
92
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:40,520
We need to convince
the council that we have
93
00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:42,560
the financial nous to take
over the community centre.
94
00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:45,880
You have never done a Town Hall, love.
You've gotta win the crowd.
95
00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:47,000
It is war.
96
00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:49,040
Maybe we should put it to the group.
97
00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:52,640
Claire, although I fully support
the democratic process,
98
00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,600
in this instance, kindly do one.
99
00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,520
I will be speaking at the meeting.
100
00:04:58,800 --> 00:04:59,800
[Gabby] Oh, my God!
101
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:01,920
Lara's back on Her.
102
00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:03,040
Am I supposed to know what that means?
103
00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:05,320
Err... okay! Erm,
104
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:07,240
Lara-- Lara's my ex,
105
00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,680
and Her is-- is a lesbian dating site,
106
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:11,560
which means that
she's single again! [inhales]
107
00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:13,160
I don't know what to do.
I mean-- should I DM her?
108
00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:14,880
I should probably DM her, right?
I mean, is it weird if I DM her?
109
00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:17,920
I don't know, I mean, I think it'd be
weirder if I didn't DM her, is that right?
110
00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:20,440
-What do I do, Greg?
-Have you thought about DM'ing her?
111
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:21,520
You really think I should?
112
00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:23,760
I mean, last time I saw her,
I royally shat the nest.
113
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,920
-Well, you're in a better place now.
-[whisper] Yeah.
114
00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:28,240
Emotionally, not physically.
I mean, your place was way nicer.
115
00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,120
Yeah. Are you on the apps?
116
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:32,120
[scoffs] No.
117
00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,360
Need a full body or brain transplant
118
00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:36,200
before an internet lady
found me attractive.
119
00:05:36,280 --> 00:05:38,480
That's nonsense. You should--
you should definitely go on the apps.
120
00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:40,840
-Really? You think so?
-Yeah! Yeah, you should.
121
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:42,800
I mean, look we... [clears throat]
122
00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:45,040
...we need to work
on a few things first, but...
123
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:46,560
Like what?
124
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:49,200
Well, your diet, posture, conversation,
125
00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:52,120
wardrobe, general aura and height.
126
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:53,480
-My height?
-Yeah.
127
00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,400
You're just-- you're too tall.
128
00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,040
-You loom over people, and it's...
-How can I change that?
129
00:05:58,120 --> 00:05:59,640
You could be in the distance more.
130
00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:02,200
Sure, I'll try that.
131
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,920
Hmm. I'm gonna make you my new project.
132
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,320
Greg 2.0.
133
00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:11,000
I'm gonna sign you up
to all of the dating apps, so...
134
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:14,640
commit to change, choose happiness,
135
00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:16,040
and eat the broccolini.
136
00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:21,240
-Careful, it's hot.
-Okay. It's hot.
137
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:23,920
Mmm!
138
00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:25,000
It's amazing!
139
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:26,680
-Yeah?
-Mmm, thank you.
140
00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,600
Erm, I spoke to my parents.
141
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,400
Okay. You ask about the loan?
142
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,280
-No.
-No?
143
00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:38,000
It's just-- just a bit difficult.
144
00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:41,560
'Cause, you know, all the money
they saved was for me to go to Oxford.
145
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:43,760
Okay.
146
00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:47,240
You're not getting cold feet
about Weston, are you?
147
00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:48,880
No!
148
00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:53,920
No, I-- I-- I just wanna approach it
really carefully, you know?
149
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,280
Erm, so I told them
we'd come over, bring dinner,
150
00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:57,960
and then, once they've
sampled your yummy food,
151
00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:00,280
then we'd bring up the loan.
152
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:01,400
-Okay.
-That okay?
153
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:02,520
-Yeah.
-You sure?
154
00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:04,040
Yes. Okay.
155
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,360
Can you just add a bit more chilli,
'cause Dad likes it hot.
156
00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,440
-Oh, yeah? So do I...
-Yeah.
157
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:19,480
Eww!
158
00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:21,560
-Go to your room!
-Go to your room.
159
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:29,360
Es, how would you like
to move to Weston with us?
160
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:31,040
To open a food shack.
161
00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:32,120
Start selling my food.
162
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,520
Why would people pay for your food?
163
00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:36,120
'Cause it's different.
164
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,600
Come on, Es! Don't you
wanna live by the beach?
165
00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:42,160
You know, sun, sea, donkeys?
166
00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:45,440
More people are killed by donkeys
every year than die in plane crashes.
167
00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:48,200
So... is that a yes?
168
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,000
Fine.
169
00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:55,560
But if a donkey even looks at me funny,
I'm moving back to Bristol.
170
00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:07,120
Excuse me.
171
00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,120
Erm, excuse me, madam,
this is private property.
172
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:10,480
For your own safety,
173
00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:13,400
I'm gonna have to ask you
to step onto the pavement, please?
174
00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:15,000
Okay.
175
00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:17,080
Legally we're now safe.
176
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:18,560
-How can I help?
-Right, well,
177
00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:21,520
I live at number 14,
just across the road.
178
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,040
You look like you're in charge.
179
00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:24,640
Your eyes do not deceive you.
180
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:26,680
I thought I should let you know
181
00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:28,840
that of an evening
182
00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:32,240
there's often comings
and goings in the centre.
183
00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:35,760
What, post 6:00 p.m.?
184
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:38,400
Yes. Sometimes late into the night.
185
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:41,760
Can I take your name, please?
186
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:42,760
Barbara Latham.
187
00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:47,640
I'm not being nosey or nothing.
I just thought it was a bit odd, you know?
188
00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:49,520
It's been empty for so long, and then...
189
00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:52,520
Can you describe these comings
and goings, please, Barbara?
190
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:56,000
Not really. I'd need to move
my sofa to get a proper look.
191
00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:57,040
Yeah,
that'd be great if you could.
192
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,320
Sofa's quite heavy, though,
and I'm on my own.
193
00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:01,440
Right, well, you've got
to bend at the knees, you see.
194
00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:02,880
Really engage the core.
195
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,400
Use the breath... [sniffs] breathe in...
196
00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:06,880
[exhales]
...lift. Okay?
197
00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:08,160
Oi.
198
00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:09,240
[Diane] Yeah.
199
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:12,840
Get a good vantage point, take photos.
200
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:13,880
Have you got a telephoto lens?
201
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,000
-No.
-No?
202
00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:17,960
Well, you can pick
'em up cheap on eBay, okay?
203
00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,880
Look, if you see
anything suspicious, call me.
204
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,040
Right.
205
00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:26,880
Shouldn't I call the police?
206
00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:28,440
Read the card, Barbara!
207
00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:31,040
I'm a Trainee Police
Community Support Officer!
208
00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:33,600
Round here, I am the law, okay?
209
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:37,640
Unless you get mugged, or raped,
210
00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:40,120
in which case call the real police.
211
00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:44,200
I need you three
to pick up supplies for me.
212
00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:46,000
Supplies? Of what?
213
00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:47,240
Raw product.
214
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,480
And bring it here tonight,
where a cook will... cook it.
215
00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:52,400
-Ready for sale.
-Why do we have to do that?
216
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:56,080
Because look at you.
No one will suspect you.
217
00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:57,160
Well, why can't you do it?
218
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,760
Because I have
to drive around intimidating
219
00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:00,840
little children that work for us.
Would you rather do that?
220
00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:03,320
I don't wanna do that.
I don't know anything about buying drugs.
221
00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:04,880
Could you just figure it out!
222
00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:08,960
No one taught me how to run
a drug empire in school either.
223
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:18,880
I'd love to help, but I promised
my daughter I'd visit my ex-wife.
224
00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:22,200
If we're cooking crack cocaine,
you're cooking crack cocaine.
225
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,080
Nah, leave him, leave him.
226
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:26,080
He's fixing things with his family.
That's important.
227
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:27,160
Yeah.
228
00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:31,120
Okay, so I'm signing you up for Tinder.
229
00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:35,640
[Greg] No, I don't wanna be one of those
sad, desperate losers on a dating app.
230
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,040
All right, fine. I'll delete it.
231
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:39,880
I guess it is just a load of people
looking for meaningless sex.
232
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,320
Well, I suppose I could give it one go.
233
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:43,600
No, Greg, I think you're right.
I think we should ease you in more gently.
234
00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:45,280
Maybe eHarmony?
235
00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:46,600
Isn't that mainly over-50s?
236
00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:47,840
Yeah.
237
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:50,160
-How old do you think I am?
-We'll need a sexy profile pic.
238
00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:53,600
Have you got any photos of you on holiday,
or maybe with a cute animal?
239
00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:57,480
Ooh, yeah! I've got a nice one of me
on Clacton Beach with a dead squid.
240
00:10:57,560 --> 00:11:00,840
[Gabby] Three... two... one... go!
241
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,120
Ooh. Yeah.
242
00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:03,920
I mean-- maybe take your glasses off?
243
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,040
-Glasses off? Yeah.
-Yeah, rock n roll.
244
00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:06,280
Yeah. Absolutely. Okay.
245
00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:08,360
Aww! Smile!
246
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:11,600
You look like a Victorian child catcher.
247
00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:14,200
Let's try a pout, okay?
248
00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:16,080
Say 'prunes'.
249
00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:18,400
[both] Ooh.
250
00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:22,560
You look like someone's doing
something to you without your consent.
251
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,360
-Greg, just...
-I'm out of my depth here.
252
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,760
If I can't even pose for a photo,
what am I gonna be like on a real date?
253
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:30,120
Maybe I can change the filter.
254
00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:32,920
Yeah? Can you filter out
middle age and desperation?
255
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,360
No. But that's a great idea for an app!
256
00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:40,720
I'm getting Greg back on the dating horse,
and he needs a bit of practise.
257
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,000
And this affects me how?
258
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,640
Would you go on a trial date with him?
259
00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:47,920
-What?
-You know, just report back,
260
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,200
let me know how he does
so that we can iron out any wrinkles
261
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:51,680
before he goes on any real dates.
262
00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,320
Definitely not.
I find Greg not only unattractive
263
00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:56,080
but sexually repugnant.
264
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:58,880
No offence taken.
265
00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:00,000
Mmm.
266
00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:03,400
You see, the thing is Diane,
I need a woman I can trust
267
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,120
to give an independent heterosexual
268
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,200
female assessment of Greg's behaviour.
269
00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:08,920
I can't be seen
socialising with criminals.
270
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,840
I mean, not only am I
his community support supervisor,
271
00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:13,280
I'm also a trainee PCSO now.
272
00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:17,080
But I need, you know,
a... dating... detective.
273
00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,680
Do you need fingerprints?
DNA? Swab of the foreskin?
274
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:24,600
Whatever you think is useful,
275
00:12:24,680 --> 00:12:26,720
but you would be doing me a massive solid.
276
00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:29,440
Go on, then.
277
00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:31,160
But only for the purposes of research.
278
00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:33,080
Fabulous, thank you!
I owe you one, Di.
279
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:34,480
I'll pick you up at 1900 hours.
280
00:12:34,560 --> 00:12:37,160
Oh, would you mind if he picks you up,
just to keep it more traditional?
281
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,240
I'll allow it.
282
00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:40,920
-Don't be late!
-No, ma'am.
283
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,560
Okay. [indistinct chatter]
284
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:55,880
[Selforth] It must be so boring
being a drug runner.
285
00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:02,040
Sitting around, doing nothing.
286
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:07,080
Just waiting and keeping lookout.
287
00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:12,160
I'd be so bored.
288
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:26,320
-No, right.
-What are we looking for?
289
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:29,200
We are looking for
a green Volkswagen Golf,
290
00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:31,480
and the driver has a scar
underneath his left eye.
291
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:33,160
Jesus.
Of course he does. Jesus!
292
00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:34,960
This is not happening!
293
00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:36,840
I'm a middle-aged bloke
with a wife and two kids, you know.
294
00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:41,080
I should-- I should be bleeding
radiators or creosoting a shed,
295
00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:44,800
not sat here waiting to pick up
a kilo of uncut shitting cocaine!
296
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:46,560
Forget it. Not doing it.
297
00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:47,760
[Myrna] Too late.
298
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:51,640
[John] Shit. Oh, shit. Shit!
299
00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:54,160
-What do we do now!? What do we do?
-[Myrna] I don't know!
300
00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:55,880
I'll just consult
my Black person manual, shall I?
301
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,560
Car park drug deals, chapter five.
302
00:13:57,640 --> 00:13:59,840
Oh, window! Oh, shit, we're doing this.
303
00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:01,720
Oh, fuck my life!
304
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,120
Hello, all right? Yo! Is it G-- are you G?
305
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,120
Good afternoon, Officer.
306
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:13,640
No, I'm not-- I'm not a policeman.
307
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,800
-No? What do you do, then?
-Me?
308
00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:19,680
Well, I'm, er,
I'm between jobs at the moment
309
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:21,120
because no one's--
310
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,400
no one's hiring a white
middle-aged bloke these days, are they?
311
00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,880
Unless you're disabled
or a transgender vegan that's...
312
00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:27,400
-Not-not-- not now...
-Not now.
313
00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:29,160
-You got the four bags?
-No.
314
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:31,480
'Cause I think we're--
I think we're buying them from you.
315
00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:35,360
Bag o' sand, grand. Four grand.
You got the four grand?
316
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:38,040
We're from Bristol.
We don't do rhyming slang.
317
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,800
Wait, if you call a grand a bag of sand,
318
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:43,480
just interested,
what do you call a bag of sand?
319
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:46,680
-You got the money?
-Yeah.
320
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,320
Shit man! Don't wave it around
like a gameshow host!
321
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,200
Put it in something.
322
00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:57,800
Have a look in the glove compartment.
323
00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:01,720
-Anything?
-No!
324
00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,960
Just some middle-of-the-road
white man music,
325
00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:06,640
and an underwear catalogue
326
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,800
that seems to be catering for women
327
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:11,040
with a fuller bust.
What is this, porn for cowards?
328
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:12,520
Just my wife's.
329
00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:14,640
Okay! I've got-- I've got an envelope.
330
00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:16,480
I've got envelope-- I've got an envelope.
331
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:17,600
Here we go.
332
00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:19,840
No!
333
00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,040
Right. You've put the money in...
334
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:24,760
-I've done-- yeah.
-Get out...
335
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:26,480
-Yeah.
-Pretend to drop your keys.
336
00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:27,640
Drop your keys.
337
00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,560
Leave the money on the front right tyre.
338
00:15:29,640 --> 00:15:31,800
He said leave the money
on the front right tyre.
339
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:34,760
And walk inside, get a coffee.
340
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:37,040
He said go get a coff--
I don't drink coffee.
341
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:38,640
It makes me all kinds of wired.
342
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,360
Is peppermint tea okay?
343
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,480
Listen!
344
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:43,000
It don't matter what you drink.
345
00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,680
Just go away, come back in ten,
346
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:48,040
and the product will be
where the money is.
347
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,960
You get me, right?
348
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:51,040
Yeah.
349
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:53,920
Go then!
350
00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,120
[John] Oh, gosh,
351
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:02,560
butterfingers!
352
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:12,080
I've got 'em!
353
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,800
[acoustic music playing]
354
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:27,600
We're coming! We're coming! We're coming.
Oh, my God, it's there. Okay.
355
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:29,040
So, I have to--
356
00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:30,440
[stuttering] Oh!
357
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:33,320
Do you know, I don't-- I do not know
what's wrong with me today.
358
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:42,520
Just, wait, wait, wait!
359
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,600
Jesus Christ. [mumbles]
360
00:16:56,920 --> 00:16:58,120
Hey, Mum!
361
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:05,280
Look who's come to see you!
362
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:06,520
Hey, Lou.
363
00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,080
Does she even know we're here?
364
00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:12,880
Erm, she doesn't talk anymore,
so we don't know how much she knows.
365
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:17,480
Frank is gonna take you for a walk today.
366
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:27,320
[Frank] Nice wheels you got there.
367
00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:30,200
A little different from that Alfa Romeo
368
00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,080
we used to skip around in.
369
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:35,240
Remember that time
370
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,560
we drove all the way to London
371
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:41,000
just to see the sun
rise over Tower Bridge?
372
00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:47,560
We broke down on the freeway coming back.
373
00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:49,160
I flagged down that guy,
374
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:54,160
persuaded him to swap
his Hillman for the Alfa Romeo.
375
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:55,400
[chuckles]
376
00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:58,560
I wonder if he ever made it home!
377
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:04,400
I'm sorry...
378
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:07,520
...I didn't visit earlier.
379
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:11,520
I've been busy.
380
00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:17,000
[Greg] Remind me of the brief again?
381
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:18,200
Just choose an outfit
you think will make
382
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:20,080
a good first impression on a first date!
383
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:21,200
[Greg] I got it.
384
00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:27,560
Leather trousers?
385
00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:30,320
Yeah! I read in GQ magazine
that every man should have
386
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:33,280
at least one peacocking item
that really makes him stand out.
387
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,160
Right, right.
388
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:36,560
But you've-you've paired
the leather trousers
389
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:38,640
with loafers and a shirt and tie?
390
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:40,920
I have, yeah, yeah. Adding a bit of class.
391
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,560
You look like
the Hell's Angels' accountant.
392
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,920
-Thank you.
-Greg, that's not a compliment.
393
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,800
[sighs] It doesn't work.
394
00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:48,080
Why not?
395
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:50,480
Jim Morrison...
396
00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:53,560
regional manager of a Morrisons.
397
00:18:54,760 --> 00:18:55,920
Come on!
398
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,320
[upbeat music playing]
399
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,680
[siren wailing]
400
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:14,960
Does he want me to pull over?
401
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:16,400
-You can't.
-[John] What?
402
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,520
-Don't pull over!
-No-- it's-- shit! Shit!
403
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:24,040
You've got a kilo of coke in your bag.
404
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,640
Oh, this is not happening!
405
00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:27,320
-What do we do? What happens, though?
-[Myrna] Stay calm.
406
00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:29,680
You just have to act like
you have not got a care in the world.
407
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:31,400
Oh!
408
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,280
[suspenseful music playing]
409
00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:42,800
[vocalist sings pop ballad]
410
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:57,560
Can you turn the music down, please, sir?
411
00:19:57,680 --> 00:19:59,040
♪ And I don't... ♪
412
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:00,320
S-- sure, sorry.
413
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:05,560
Is there a problem, Officer?
414
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:08,160
You were doing 40
in a 30-mile-per-hour zone.
415
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,880
Do you know, I literally didn't know
that that was a 30.
416
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:14,000
I assume you understand the dangers
417
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,280
of driving over the speed limit
in a built-up area?
418
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:21,200
Listen, I-I know that highway code
like the back of my hand.
419
00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:22,800
License.
420
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,520
Sorry.
421
00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:25,680
-Are you all right?
-Yeah.
422
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:28,880
He just prides himself
on being a really good driver.
423
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:30,320
He's a bit embarrassed.
424
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,080
Hopefully three points
and a hundred-quid fine
425
00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:34,560
will make him be
a bit more careful in the future.
426
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:36,040
-Three points!
-One minute.
427
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:37,240
Three points!
428
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:41,200
Are you-- you should be out there
catching criminals, mate!
429
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:43,080
-Three points!
-Thank you, Officer!
430
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,440
And once again,
we are really sorry.
431
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:48,520
Three points! That is-- that is madness!
432
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,960
Would you rather have
20 years in jail for drug dealing?
433
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,560
[grunts]
434
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:54,560
-You all right?
-No, I feel--
435
00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:56,000
I feel like I can't breathe!
436
00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:57,560
Oh, God.
437
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,440
You're hyperventilating. Hold on.
438
00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:04,520
Myrna, seriously, I'm...
439
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,480
You know, take that. Breathe into that.
440
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:08,720
Okay.
441
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:09,800
Better?
442
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:11,480
It's bloody plastic!
443
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,240
Just take small breaths
and try and stay calm.
444
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:16,560
[groans] I don't like it, Myrna...
445
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:18,320
Right! Here we go.
446
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,320
Try some of that.
447
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:22,680
It is herbal but it will calm you down.
448
00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:24,080
-[spits] What the-- what is that?
-No!
449
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:25,800
You're supposed to dab some
behind your ears!
450
00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:28,320
Oh, for Christ's sake!
Oh, Christ's sake, Myrna!
451
00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:29,760
Oh, God!
452
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:36,640
[Frank] Bad luck, Reg!
453
00:21:36,720 --> 00:21:38,080
Come on, Stanley!
454
00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:41,760
Bad luck, fellas!
455
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:45,800
-Wanna go again?
-Oh, seriously?
456
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:47,000
You're unbelievable.
457
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:50,560
Dennis here is the unbelievable one!
458
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:52,440
Three winning shots on the bounce!
459
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,560
I think he's hustling me!
460
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,600
So, you can't even spend
half an hour with her.
461
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:59,440
Margie, she has no idea
what's happening.
462
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,920
Do you even understand
why that's wrong?
463
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:05,880
I have to level with you,
seeing her like this makes me feel bad.
464
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:07,360
It isn't about you!
465
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:09,040
When she got sick,
you never visited her.
466
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:11,360
You just pretended she didn't exist.
Well, she does exist.
467
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,600
And if seeing her makes you feel bad,
then that's tough!
468
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:16,200
Whoa.
469
00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:18,760
Mum? Mum?
470
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:20,920
Get a-- get a nurse!
471
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:24,000
[dramatic music playing]
472
00:22:30,120 --> 00:22:31,560
[sighs]
473
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:38,560
[knocks on door]
474
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:42,720
Hello, Rani.
475
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:44,280
Hello, Mum.
476
00:22:44,360 --> 00:22:45,520
Come in, come in.
477
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:52,680
-Shoes off at the door, please.
-Yeah, sure.
478
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:55,600
I don't want any scratches on my floor.
479
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:57,840
There are no scratches on the floor.
480
00:22:57,920 --> 00:23:00,560
Because it's shoes off at the door!
[laughs]
481
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,200
Please, put on some slippers.
482
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,440
You can wear an old pair of mine!
483
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:07,880
Yeah, you don't have to wear those.
484
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:12,080
No-- I've-- I've never had a pair
of slippers before!
485
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:17,280
Oh! They're-- they're lush!
486
00:23:17,360 --> 00:23:18,480
Oh, good!
487
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:21,080
I hope you're hungry!
488
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,760
Oh, yes! [chuckles]
489
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:25,720
-Please, it's through there.
-Thank you.
490
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,800
[cheery music playing]
491
00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:40,400
Evening, Diane.
492
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,560
-You look nice.
-19:03.
493
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:47,640
Subject is three minutes late
and did not, I repeat, not bring flowers.
494
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:48,720
Breathe?
495
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:52,040
Breath, adequate.
496
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,160
Aftershave, vinegary.
497
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:56,880
-You gonna do this all night?
-As I see fit.
498
00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:59,080
I just think it might ruin the mood.
499
00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:03,400
Subject questions methodology
of the adjudicator.
500
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:05,680
Bye, Mum!
501
00:24:08,120 --> 00:24:11,160
Subject picks up hot date in a beige
502
00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:14,520
2012 Skoda Octavia.
503
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,880
Makes him look
like a Bulgarian minicab driver.
504
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,800
Vehicle interior
smells like balls and Glade.
505
00:24:27,880 --> 00:24:30,040
-Happy to go?
-Yeah, let's get this over with.
506
00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:32,800
[grunts]
I'm gonna have to crack a window.
507
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:36,800
[breathes deeply]
508
00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:39,880
[whimsical music playing]
509
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,440
-[distant dogs barking]
-Sorry.
510
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:47,800
Sorry.
511
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:52,760
You're not what I expected.
512
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:54,520
-You're late.
-Sorry, yeah.
513
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,800
-We just had a bit of a run in with the--
-Traffic!
514
00:24:57,880 --> 00:24:59,720
With the traffic on the M4.
515
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:01,760
You know what the traffic
can be like on the M4.
516
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:04,640
My mum's the best cook in the South West.
517
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:07,320
She's Michelin-starred,
it's rude to keep her waiting.
518
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:10,080
Sorry, let's-- let's crack on, shall we?
519
00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:12,320
No pun intended.
520
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:17,800
It's just through those
double doors up there.
521
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:27,600
John, there is a meeting tonight
which I cannot miss.
522
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:29,080
Cop hold.
523
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:30,720
What do you mean there's a meeting?
524
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,280
You can't leave me with these people!
525
00:25:33,360 --> 00:25:34,680
They seem nice.
526
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:37,760
They seem-- Myrna,
these people cook crack for a living!
527
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:39,000
Oh, you're being a coward!
528
00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:40,720
No. I don't wanna do this on my own!
529
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:44,720
Look. I know that today
has been rather stressful.
530
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:48,480
-Stressful!
-I will be back in an hour! I promise.
531
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,560
-Go, go!
-No... listen... lis...
532
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:54,880
Myrns!
533
00:25:57,680 --> 00:26:00,680
[cheery music playing]
534
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:19,880
You've not done this before, have you?
535
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:20,960
Can you tell?
536
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:24,200
[Anastasia] You don't look like someone
who usually deals crack.
537
00:26:24,280 --> 00:26:26,040
What d'you need the money for?
538
00:26:26,120 --> 00:26:27,600
Gambling debts?
539
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:28,920
Big divorce settlement?
540
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:30,720
A London gangster wants to kill me.
541
00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:32,920
[laughs]
542
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:34,600
Classic!
543
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:48,520
Calm your nerves.
544
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:52,360
Cheers.
545
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:54,920
Cheers.
546
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:00,000
-What's your name?
-[coughs] John.
547
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:01,960
-Yours?
-Anastasia.
548
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,360
-Really?
-No!
549
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,480
Never use your real name, John.
550
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:11,480
First rule of crack dealing.
551
00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:14,560
[whimsical music playing]
552
00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:22,320
Nice, innit?
553
00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:26,360
-Would you like another drink?
-Yeah, definitely.
554
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:27,560
[whistles] Excuse me!
555
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,760
Can I have another Grolsch for me
and a white wine spritzer for him?
556
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:33,360
[sighs]
557
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:37,560
Why don't you ask me some questions?
558
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:39,800
Oh, yeah. Questions, yeah? Good idea.
559
00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:44,240
What is your favourite colour, please?
560
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:46,880
This is a date,
not a Smash Hits interview.
561
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:48,360
Ask me an adult question.
562
00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:51,640
-Have you ever had a threesome?
-No, not like an adult movie question.
563
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,000
And, yeah, I have.
564
00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:54,720
Didn't enjoy it. Too much talking.
565
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:59,160
Just ask me a normal question
from one person to another.
566
00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:01,640
-Do you have any hobbies?
-No. I don't have time for hobbies.
567
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:03,120
Too busy training as a PSCO.
568
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:04,640
-Oh, yeah! How's that going?
-Yeah, it's awesome.
569
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:07,520
Incapacitant spray training last week.
That was a highlight.
570
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:08,920
What does that involve?
571
00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:11,280
This.
572
00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:13,320
Pepper Spray.
573
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,640
They spray it on our faces
so we know what it feels like.
574
00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:19,160
-They issue you with this, do they?
-Oh, God! No, no.
575
00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,560
-Pepper spray is illegal.
-So where did you get that?
576
00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:24,000
Next question.
577
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:29,600
[Lara] It's good to see you.
578
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:31,320
Yeah, yeah, you too, you too!
579
00:28:31,400 --> 00:28:33,200
And you're drinking water?
580
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:35,160
I'm-- I'm completely off the booze now.
581
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:37,160
Like, for real this time.
582
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:38,360
-That's great.
-Yeah, yeah.
583
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,120
Oh, and the drugs and...
584
00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:42,640
yeah, I got rid of all the hangers-on,
you know?
585
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:46,400
Just realised that they were actually
just taking the piss.
586
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:47,800
[nervous laugh]
587
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:54,120
Look, erm, Lara, I... I want you to know
588
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,320
that I have completely
sorted myself out and...
589
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,520
well, I-- I saw that you're--
you're on Her,
590
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:04,520
and I thought maybe
you might wanna try again?
591
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:06,880
-Gabby...
-I'm completely clean, I promise.
592
00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:08,760
I mean, I don't--
I don't touch a thing now,
593
00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:10,640
not even on weekends
or on special occasions.
594
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:11,720
-That's great.
-Yeah.
595
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:14,480
I'm pleased for you really, I am.
596
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:18,880
But I forgot to remove
my profile from Her.
597
00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:20,240
I'm not single.
598
00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:21,960
I'm actually engaged.
599
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:31,080
Er, congratulations.
600
00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:36,960
-Wow. Erm, do I--
-No!
601
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:43,360
Look I probably need to go.
602
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:44,520
Of course, no, of course.
603
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:46,440
It really was nice to see you.
604
00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:54,640
[rock music playing]
605
00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:59,920
[clattering]
606
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,520
Where did you hide it,
you overgrown stick insect?
607
00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:14,880
[rock music playing]
608
00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:24,080
Who still buys DVDs, Greg?
609
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:27,640
[vocalist sings aggressive song]
610
00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:47,240
[sing-song] Yes!
611
00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:51,000
[aggressive song ends]
612
00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:09,720
[slow music playing]
613
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:19,040
You look... tired.
614
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:20,840
Your eyes are dark.
615
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:22,800
-Are you getting enough sleep?
-Mum...
616
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:24,320
Well, then,
you're not drinking enough water.
617
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:26,040
Jerzy, pour Rani a glass of water.
618
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:27,400
No, I don't want any water.
619
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:29,240
Yeah, you need about seven
or eight glasses...
620
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:31,240
I don't want any water!
621
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:36,600
[sighs]
622
00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:39,320
You may think you are old enough
to look after yourself,
623
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,840
make your own decisions,
but look at you.
624
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:44,080
You're a mess, abandoning your future...
625
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:46,600
-I'm not talking about this.
-...living with a boy with no prospects.
626
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:48,920
What sort of a boy
has never owned a pair of slippers?
627
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:50,040
Why are you fixating on that?
628
00:31:50,120 --> 00:31:53,200
Because it tells us all that we need
to know about the kind of boy he is.
629
00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:55,680
[Shanthi] You are throwing your life
after some sort of low-life
630
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:57,760
that we've always tried
to protect you from...
631
00:31:57,840 --> 00:31:59,520
-Ah!
-[laughs]
632
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:01,560
Wow, Ben, smells delicious!
633
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:03,080
Thank you!
634
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:05,360
There's extra chilli in this one for you,
Mr Rekowski.
635
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:06,560
Rani told me you like your food hot.
636
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:07,640
The hotter the better.
637
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,880
-[laughter]
-[Jerzy] You make all this yourself?
638
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:10,960
Yeah.
639
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:12,560
I'll just be...
640
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:13,640
Ah.
641
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:19,720
[Greg] My wife felt
that we were stuck in a rut,
642
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:22,720
so Mr Romantic here surprised her
with a camping trip to Cornwall,
643
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:25,520
and while I was emptying out
the chemical toilet, this chap came by
644
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:27,680
and he's like, 'Oh, would you like to do
some white water rafting with me?'
645
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:29,240
Apparently, some other people
had dropped out, and he needed
646
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:31,520
to make up the numbers 'cause otherwise
he would have lost his deposit...
647
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:32,720
It doesn't matter, move on.
648
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,800
Yeah, well, anyway,
I couldn't do it myself
649
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:37,080
because I've only got
my 10-metre swimming badge.
650
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,360
But my wife did go with him and, erm...
651
00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:41,440
[Diane] Don't tell me.
You caught her with the bloke
652
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:42,600
shagging your wife's brains out.
653
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:45,680
No, no. But, she fell in love with...
654
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:46,960
The other bloke.
655
00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:48,040
Cause he's a demon in the sack
656
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:51,240
and having sex with you is
like shagging a giant Peperami.
657
00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:54,760
No, she fell in love
with danger and adrenaline.
658
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:55,920
Oh, right.
659
00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:57,280
There was no stopping her after that.
660
00:32:57,360 --> 00:32:59,960
She got into base jumping
and abseiling
661
00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:02,440
and doing parkour
round Bristol City Centre.
662
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,240
I mean, we'd be down in town
doing a bit of Christmas shopping,
663
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,600
she'd suddenly
be off over the roof of Argos.
664
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:08,880
She wanted us to do
a bungee jump together,
665
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,120
to try and sort of save the marriage.
666
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:12,200
So I agreed.
667
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:15,640
We got harnessed up, stood on the edge
of Clifton Suspension Bridge,
668
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:17,160
but I couldn't go through with it.
669
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,000
She jumped, looked back,
saw me standing there
670
00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:22,480
and just shouted, 'I want a divorce',
as she plummeted into Avon gorge.
671
00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:25,760
She bounced back up and shouted,
'You're dragging me down!'
672
00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:28,440
Even though it was gravity dragging
her down at that point, to be honest,
673
00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:30,720
but, erm,
I understood what she was saying,
674
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:34,960
which is that I'm boring.
675
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:38,400
No. You're not boring.
676
00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:41,600
-Wanna do the quiz?
-Yeah, for the love of God, yeah.
677
00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:42,920
Thank you.
678
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:44,120
[sighs]
679
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:47,040
Team name.
680
00:33:47,120 --> 00:33:48,640
Diane and Greg.
681
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:51,560
[slow music playing]
682
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:53,760
-Margie...
-Don't talk to me.
683
00:33:53,840 --> 00:33:56,960
[slow music playing]
684
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:10,760
[Jerzy] I have never tasted
anything like this.
685
00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:13,320
It's so... fresh!
686
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,160
[Shanthi chuckles]
Would you give me the recipe?
687
00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:17,640
The recipe belongs to my Grandma,
688
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:19,880
so I'm gonna have to take
that one to my grave.
689
00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:21,600
[laughter]
690
00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:23,840
I'm really glad
that you like Ben's cooking,
691
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:27,120
'cause we actually have something
that we want to talk to you about.
692
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:33,400
We're gonna-- we want to open
a food place in Weston.
693
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:38,280
With my cooking and Rani's brain,
694
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:41,200
who knows, we might be able to start
our own franchise.
695
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:43,600
And we were wondering
if you could give us a loan?
696
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:46,760
Which we will pay back
once we get back on our feet.
697
00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:48,840
Oh, what about Oxford?
698
00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:51,160
That was your dream, not mine.
699
00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:54,680
So, a food shack in Weston.
That's your dream?
700
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:56,160
Yeah.
701
00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:57,200
[scoffs]
702
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:04,440
Your mother and I
started a business from scratch.
703
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,200
It takes all of your energies.
704
00:35:06,320 --> 00:35:08,760
So much hard work,
you will have no free time.
705
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:10,440
Yeah, I know.
706
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:15,040
Well, I imagine the sense
of achievement must be intense.
707
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:17,280
Starting a business from nothing,
708
00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:19,640
raising such an amazing daughter
at the same time?
709
00:35:21,840 --> 00:35:24,600
What I want most is what you have.
710
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,440
I never had a stable upbringing.
711
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:31,680
Well, you know, the thought
of starting my own business,
712
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:36,160
buying my own house, wife, kids...
713
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:38,600
[deep sigh]
714
00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:42,360
So...
715
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:45,560
what do you think about the loan?
716
00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:47,560
-[scoffs]
-We'll, er...
717
00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:50,640
we'll think about it.
718
00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:54,400
[Claire] Look at the slide.
719
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,480
Fourteen percent
of over-25s we surveyed
720
00:35:57,560 --> 00:36:00,280
said a phone mast
brings no jobs to the community.
721
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:02,160
Or anything productive.
722
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:03,640
And on the next slide...
723
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:12,800
What it will bring is faster
data download and upload speed,
724
00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:15,400
so no more waiting for Netflix to buffer.
725
00:36:15,480 --> 00:36:17,000
-[audience laughing]
-[man] And we're planning to build
726
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:20,160
in front of the mast site,
as a voluntary contribution
727
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:23,160
to the community at our own expense,
728
00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:25,320
a park bench and...
729
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:26,920
three trees.
730
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:29,600
[Claire] Yeah, yea, yes, yes,
but returning to slide four...
731
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:32,480
Oh! Just what we need. More slides!
732
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:33,680
[laughter]
733
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,160
We don't need another park bench
around here either.
734
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:40,600
Where kids can go to drink or get high
because they're so bloody bored.
735
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:43,800
This guy will promise you
the moon on a string
736
00:36:43,880 --> 00:36:45,640
if it gets him his planning application.
737
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:47,120
But he'll be gone in a week.
738
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:51,040
Me, and you, and Claire, we live here.
739
00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:54,440
There are kids out there
as young as 9 or 10
740
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,600
selling drugs to make ends meet.
741
00:36:56,640 --> 00:37:00,200
I know. I see them every day.
742
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:03,160
They don't need faster mobile phone speeds
743
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:06,680
if they're dead or locked up
or hooked on crack.
744
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:08,840
-Well...
-What they do need
745
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:11,160
is somewhere to go at nights,
746
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:14,160
to study, to get what they need,
747
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:17,400
where their parents
can get therapy or go to rehab
748
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:19,680
or learn to dance!
749
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:23,840
Mate, we don't need
your phone tower around here.
750
00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:28,440
What we do need is community!
751
00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:36,880
Plus, 5G gives you COVID-19.
752
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:40,000
[cheers and applause]
753
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:47,680
[slow music playing]
754
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:06,480
You like-- you like cooking other things.
Erm, food, or...
755
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:10,640
just the crack?
756
00:38:10,680 --> 00:38:13,600
[slow music playing]
757
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,760
How does someone like you
wind up in trouble with a London gangster?
758
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:35,800
That's a very long
and a very depressing story.
759
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:36,960
We've got a while.
760
00:38:38,280 --> 00:38:39,320
Nah.
761
00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:44,320
You don't want my tale of woe.
762
00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:49,360
Want some?
763
00:38:49,440 --> 00:38:50,680
No.
764
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:52,840
-You ever tried it?
-Have I ever smoked crack?
765
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,600
Er, no, no, I've never smoked crack.
766
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:59,000
I'm a middle-aged married man
with two kids and a recurrent hernia.
767
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,280
-All the more reason to smoke some.
-No, I read the papers.
768
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:03,520
I know what that stuff's like.
Instantly addictive.
769
00:39:03,600 --> 00:39:04,840
I'd have one puff and in a month,
770
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:07,320
I'd have no teeth
and a pimp named Alphonso.
771
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:08,920
[scoffs]
772
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:10,200
No.
773
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,160
It's nothing like The Daily Mail says.
774
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:14,880
Just amazingly good fun.
775
00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:17,080
[smirks]
776
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:38,800
How much amazingly good fun?
777
00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:41,800
It will make you forget your tale of woe.
778
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:44,880
[tense music playing]
779
00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:54,600
Oh, shit!
780
00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:58,080
[vocalist sings soulful ballad]
781
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:14,880
She's stable, so you can see her.
782
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:21,120
[soulful ballad ends]
783
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:26,920
[man] Which famous actor
is said to have invented
784
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,600
the Magnum ice cream?
785
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:30,640
Oh, what?
786
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:33,640
-Who is gonna get that?
-Roger Moore.
787
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:34,960
He loved a choc ice,
788
00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:37,000
but he didn't like getting chocolate
ice cream on his safari suit.
789
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,440
So he thought, hang on,
I'll pop a stick in the end.
790
00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:40,760
Ergo, the Magnum.
791
00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:43,920
What about the picture round?
I don't know any of them.
792
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:46,560
Rod Hull, Samantha Fox, Keith Flint
from The Prodigy, Kendall Jenner,
793
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:49,800
Jeffrey from Rainbow, Charles Manson,
Emma Stone, and DJ Bruno Brookes.
794
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:54,800
[man] What is the capital of Ecuador?
795
00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:57,000
-Oh, you are havin' a laugh!
-Quito.
796
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:58,520
Yep, we got it. We know it.
797
00:40:58,600 --> 00:40:59,960
-Okay.
-Okay.
798
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:03,440
[tense music playing]
799
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:06,520
[car engine revving]
800
00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:25,120
[mellow music playing]
801
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:28,320
[indistinct chatter]
802
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:45,160
[mellow music playing]
803
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:03,320
[indistinct chatter]
804
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:18,440
-[indistinct]
-What?
805
00:42:26,160 --> 00:42:28,160
[camera shutter clicks]
806
00:42:32,560 --> 00:42:34,960
-Anyone watching you?
-No.
807
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:37,840
I can't see who's inside.
808
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:40,640
-No one complaining?
-Nah, I got compliments.
809
00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:44,680
Did you lose any regulars?
810
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:47,200
-Don't think so.
-Is that a yes or a no?
811
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:48,800
It's a no.
812
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:50,640
-[whispers] Don't lie to me.
-I ain't.
813
00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:52,520
Do you know what happens when you lie?
814
00:42:52,600 --> 00:42:55,520
-Yeah, and I ain't lying.
-You better not be.
815
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:00,960
Go.
816
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:05,920
[dramatic music playing]
817
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:19,840
[man] ...which means the runners-up,
in second place
818
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:24,080
with 36 points are...
819
00:43:24,160 --> 00:43:25,200
[Greg] You're crushing my fingers.
820
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:26,480
I'm sorry, it's my natural vice-like grip.
821
00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:28,280
...J Lo's Ass!
822
00:43:29,200 --> 00:43:32,840
Which means the winners
are Cagney and Lacey!
823
00:43:32,920 --> 00:43:36,120
Ye-haw! Whoo! Losers!
824
00:43:36,160 --> 00:43:38,640
Losers! Losers!
825
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:40,400
Oh, hello, sir, you all right?
826
00:43:40,480 --> 00:43:42,480
You just dropped something
on the floor... that!
827
00:43:42,560 --> 00:43:44,560
-And one for you!
-I will remember that.
828
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:46,640
Wow! Oh my God!
829
00:43:46,720 --> 00:43:49,440
I've never won anything before,
you are insane at quizzes!
830
00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:51,440
Oh, thanks, yeah.
Product of a misspent youth.
831
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:53,520
I played a lot of Trivial Pursuit
in my teens.
832
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:54,600
-Wow! Idea.
Wild.
833
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:57,960
You and I go back to my house,
have coffee and sexual intercourse.
834
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:01,640
I don't do tea-bagging,
golden showers, or reverse anal.
835
00:44:01,720 --> 00:44:03,800
-Everything else is up for grabs.
-What's reverse anal?
836
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:05,920
Wouldn't that just be regular,
in the front door?
837
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:08,200
[Diane] No, that's what they want you
to think. Hold that thought.
838
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:11,640
-Go for Diane Pemberley.
-[Barbara] Hello, it's Barbara.
839
00:44:11,720 --> 00:44:13,840
-Who?
-There's people in the centre.
840
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:15,840
I can see their shadows moving about.
841
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:18,480
-Right. Did you get a camera?
-[Barbara] Yes, I found one
842
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:20,200
in the back of the sideboard.
843
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:23,640
I'm not sure how well
it'll come out, mind.
844
00:44:23,720 --> 00:44:25,680
It's been in the drawer
since my Kenny died.
845
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:28,680
-God, I miss him!
-Right! Stay focused, woman!
846
00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:31,120
Take pictures of everything, okay?
I'm coming over.
847
00:44:31,200 --> 00:44:33,080
I need you to drop me off
at the community centre.
848
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:35,360
There are people inside
looking suspicious.
849
00:44:36,280 --> 00:44:38,160
What about-- what about the coffee,
and the... sexual intercourse?
850
00:44:38,240 --> 00:44:39,440
Well, that's off.
851
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:41,160
I mean look, if this turns
into a stakeout,
852
00:44:41,240 --> 00:44:42,600
I might give you
a quick hand job, all right?
853
00:44:42,680 --> 00:44:45,200
No promises, though. Come on. Let's go.
854
00:44:56,040 --> 00:44:57,320
[Christian] Oh, shit!
855
00:44:57,400 --> 00:44:59,160
I think we're being followed.
856
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:01,360
By who?
857
00:45:01,440 --> 00:45:04,080
[Christian] You see that black Vauxhall?
It was there when we left Windmill Hill.
858
00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:07,240
-What do we do?
-Erm...
859
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:08,960
Er...
860
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:10,360
Just, erm, take-- take a left.
861
00:45:13,160 --> 00:45:14,840
A-And go right. Go right.
862
00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:17,920
[tense music playing]
863
00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:27,760
-Fuck!
-Fuck!
864
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:30,640
Can you see who it is?
865
00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:34,000
It's the police. Go.
866
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:41,680
I just got a text from Greg saying
stop cooking crack, Diane's on her way.
867
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:43,280
Oh, shit!
868
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:50,960
[vocalist sings pop ballad]
869
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:57,240
-[John] ...yeah, my own father
-Sacked you?
870
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:01,680
[John]
I had a mortgage, kids school fees,
871
00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:03,640
skiing, bollocks.
872
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,880
You know, it's eight hundred pounds
a year for horse riding insurance.
873
00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:09,640
Eight hundred pounds!
874
00:46:09,720 --> 00:46:12,480
I mean, just don't crash
your horse, right?
875
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:13,720
[sniffs]
876
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:15,040
Doesn't your wife work?
877
00:46:15,120 --> 00:46:16,720
[sighs]
878
00:46:16,800 --> 00:46:20,400
She makes and sells vegan
dog treats, so, no.
879
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:22,480
[chuckles]
880
00:46:24,240 --> 00:46:26,320
-Er, what's funny?
-[laughs]
881
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:27,720
Vegan dog treats!
882
00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:30,880
-Are you down with vegan dogs?
-[chuckles]
883
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:35,120
I think I'm beginning
to understand your tale of woe.
884
00:46:40,800 --> 00:46:43,000
[vocalist sings 1980s pop ballad]
885
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,480
[indistinct]
886
00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,280
Hello?
887
00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:56,560
[Rani] Erm, are you
at the community centre?
888
00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:59,080
-No. I had to pop out for a bit.
-Pop out?
889
00:46:59,160 --> 00:47:01,920
-Why are you popping out?
-Yeah, I've left John in charge.
890
00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:04,240
[Rani] Well, he isn't answering his phone,
891
00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:07,280
and Diane is on her way there,
so you have to get everyone out!
892
00:47:07,360 --> 00:47:09,400
I'm busy. Why can't you?
893
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:13,200
-[Rani] I'm in a police car chase!
-What did you say?
894
00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:14,640
I don't think I heard you right.
895
00:47:14,720 --> 00:47:16,240
[man] I bet you wish you had 5G.
896
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:19,000
[Rani] Hello? Hello?
897
00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:21,800
[Diane] Why are you driving so slowly?
Have you heard of second gear?
898
00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:24,400
-[Greg] A little kiddie might jump out.
-[Diane] Kiddie? It's night time!
899
00:47:24,480 --> 00:47:26,840
-You're doing about eight miles an hour.
-Speed kills.
900
00:47:28,600 --> 00:47:31,720
What are you doing?! Don't wave 'em on!
Don't let 'em overtake you.
901
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:33,800
Well, you know,
I'm just... feeling generous.
902
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:35,320
Oh, my God.
903
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:38,240
Subject drives like my nan.
904
00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:40,360
Well, you know there's a lot of idiots
on the road this time of night.
905
00:47:40,440 --> 00:47:42,440
-You've gotta be careful.
-Yeah, idiots like you.
906
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:44,000
Number one over here.
907
00:47:44,080 --> 00:47:46,720
She's going faster than we are!
With her stupid little scooter.
908
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:48,320
[Greg] Well, yeah, but that's reckless,
isn't it? Absolutely reckless.
909
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:49,480
[Diane] It's not reckless.
910
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:51,960
Go through right, we're coming
up to the lights. That's good.
911
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:54,240
Right-- amber, go through on the amber,
go through on the amber!
912
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:55,320
Well, you shouldn't go
through on the amber.
913
00:47:55,400 --> 00:47:56,920
No, cause it might change to red.
You see there you go.
914
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:58,680
-[Diane] Oh, my God.
-You've gotta be careful.
915
00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:01,040
What are you doing?
916
00:48:02,240 --> 00:48:03,480
Where are you going?
917
00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:04,840
What are you up to? What's going on?
918
00:48:04,920 --> 00:48:07,480
I'm commandeering this vehicle
for volunteer police purposes.
919
00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:10,080
[Haines] It's Haines.
We're following a black Range Rover.
920
00:48:10,960 --> 00:48:13,040
Yeah, I need you to run
a plate for me, please.
921
00:48:14,360 --> 00:48:17,760
-They still there?
-Yeah.
922
00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:20,480
[Christian] Okay. What am I doing?
Where am I going?
923
00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:23,200
-Rani, what now? They're behind us!
-[Rani] Calm. Down.
924
00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:24,880
I'm trying to think!
925
00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:26,280
Go right, go right!
926
00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:29,360
[rock music playing]
927
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:33,680
[Rani] We need to lose them! Fuck!
928
00:48:33,760 --> 00:48:36,400
[man] The vehicle is leased
to a Christian Taylor.
929
00:48:37,600 --> 00:48:39,320
We need to overtake that lorry there.
930
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:40,840
[Haines] Taylor's in prison.
931
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:42,320
[man] It's his car.
932
00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:45,160
[Rani] Go, go, go.
933
00:48:45,240 --> 00:48:48,360
[rock music playing]
934
00:48:50,120 --> 00:48:51,640
Wait for it...
935
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:55,440
Now pull off! Pull off!
936
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:08,480
Where-- where are they?
937
00:49:10,160 --> 00:49:11,920
-Where are they?
-I can't see them.
938
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:16,200
Shit!
939
00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:20,080
We have to find that Range.
940
00:49:20,160 --> 00:49:22,240
Whoever is driving that
is running Brook Hill.
941
00:49:26,760 --> 00:49:29,760
[rock music playing]
942
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:37,520
[exhales]
943
00:49:37,600 --> 00:49:38,960
[Rani] My heart is racing.
944
00:49:40,160 --> 00:49:43,720
That was incredible!
That was so cool!
945
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:45,400
Hmm.
946
00:49:45,480 --> 00:49:46,560
Wait, Rani, wait.
947
00:49:46,640 --> 00:49:48,400
That weren't cool.
948
00:49:48,480 --> 00:49:50,320
Yeah, it was!
We totally outfoxed them.
949
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:52,160
So cool.
950
00:49:52,240 --> 00:49:55,040
-Wait, wait, wait, wait!
-Yeah?
951
00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:57,640
-Does this stuff turn you on?
-What stuff?
952
00:49:57,720 --> 00:50:00,320
-[moans]
-Car chases.
953
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:02,160
The drug deals. The gang shit!
954
00:50:04,040 --> 00:50:07,000
No, of course not.
It doesn't. Just, erm...
955
00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:10,320
it must be my adrenaline... pumping.
956
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:17,800
We need to get rid of this car.
957
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:20,680
[slow music playing]
958
00:50:22,360 --> 00:50:24,040
[sighs]
959
00:50:28,840 --> 00:50:30,840
[panting]
960
00:50:34,960 --> 00:50:37,320
-What is going on?
-Myrns!
961
00:50:38,680 --> 00:50:40,480
I'm a crack ho.
962
00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:42,440
What?!
963
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:44,200
Diane is coming.
964
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:46,400
We need to get out here.
965
00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:49,240
Diane is on her way here!
966
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:51,440
We need to pack up
and get out of here now!
967
00:50:51,520 --> 00:50:54,280
We need to pack up
and get out of here, come on! Move.
968
00:50:54,360 --> 00:50:59,200
[vocalist sings soulful ballad]
969
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:02,560
I'm coming, Dad.
970
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:07,040
[screams] John!
971
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:10,120
[dramatic music playing]
972
00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:20,960
What have we got here, then?
973
00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:25,160
Light on at the side of the building.
974
00:51:25,240 --> 00:51:27,320
Moving to investigate.
975
00:51:27,400 --> 00:51:30,560
Hmm. Gate is unlocked.
976
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:32,400
-Note to self-- what?
-Diane!
977
00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:34,520
I have to tell you something
before you go in there.
978
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:36,640
-Well, it'll have to wait.
-No! It can't wait.
979
00:51:36,720 --> 00:51:38,680
I have to tell you it now.
980
00:51:39,440 --> 00:51:43,320
The reason I was driving so slow
earlier, like your nan,
981
00:51:43,400 --> 00:51:48,720
is so that I could spend more time
with you and enjoy your...
982
00:51:48,800 --> 00:51:49,840
magical personality.
983
00:51:49,920 --> 00:51:53,400
-Yeah, makes sense.
-Yeah, but there's more.
984
00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:57,040
[sighs] Diane Permberley...
985
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:00,720
-I love you.
-Well, you're only human.
986
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:02,280
Yeah.
987
00:52:11,560 --> 00:52:13,800
[screams]
988
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:16,320
God!
989
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:20,960
I had to incapacitate subject
as his libido became inflamed
990
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:22,640
by his smoking hot date.
991
00:52:22,720 --> 00:52:25,360
Headed inside to investigate further.
992
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:27,160
What's in it! What's in it!
993
00:52:27,240 --> 00:52:28,640
[sobbing]
994
00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:31,080
I need a wet wipe!
995
00:52:33,120 --> 00:52:35,240
[Diane] I am entering the premises.
996
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:38,320
[tense music playing]
997
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:05,800
[Greg] Diane?
998
00:53:06,640 --> 00:53:10,520
I can't drive you home,
'cause I'm blind now.
999
00:53:10,600 --> 00:53:13,600
[fire scorching]
1000
00:53:15,640 --> 00:53:17,560
Christian is gonna be so pissed.
1001
00:53:18,720 --> 00:53:20,360
He only had six months left on the lease.
1002
00:53:30,400 --> 00:53:31,960
I'm gonna get a tea, do you want one?
1003
00:53:34,040 --> 00:53:35,040
No.
1004
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:55,160
We swore we'd never be that couple
with nothing to say to each other.
1005
00:53:55,240 --> 00:53:57,800
Remember, when we met...
1006
00:53:59,120 --> 00:54:03,320
you taught me The Shuffle, The Backdrop.
1007
00:54:04,280 --> 00:54:06,960
King and Queen of the dance floor.
1008
00:54:07,040 --> 00:54:10,000
We were a head-turning couple.
1009
00:54:11,960 --> 00:54:16,360
Being busy is not the reason
I didn't visit when you got sick, Lou.
1010
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,360
It's 'cause I was in a pub!
1011
00:54:19,680 --> 00:54:20,680
Getting high.
1012
00:54:22,640 --> 00:54:23,640
Getting laid.
1013
00:54:24,560 --> 00:54:28,080
'Cause all of that was a hundred times
easier than facing you,
1014
00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:31,920
'cause facing you meant facing me,
and I never could do that.
1015
00:54:33,120 --> 00:54:36,160
I missed my chance to say sorry...
1016
00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:38,680
when it mattered.
1017
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:43,280
What the heck, I'm gonna say it now.
1018
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:45,200
Anyway, I'm sorry.
1019
00:54:45,280 --> 00:54:50,520
I'm sorry you had to put up
with all the lies,
1020
00:54:50,600 --> 00:54:53,400
then apologies, then more lies.
1021
00:54:54,640 --> 00:54:57,400
I'm sorry for the things
I did when I was here
1022
00:54:57,480 --> 00:54:59,560
and the things I didn't do when I wasn't.
1023
00:54:59,640 --> 00:55:03,400
And I'm sorry I didn't get to know
our little girl earlier.
1024
00:55:03,480 --> 00:55:06,080
You raised a helluva woman
without me, Lou.
1025
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:10,760
You know, I don't have a pot to piss in.
1026
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:14,720
All I got to show
for my time on this earth...
1027
00:55:14,800 --> 00:55:16,640
is what I walked out on.
1028
00:55:17,480 --> 00:55:20,920
So, let's us, you and me...
1029
00:55:22,600 --> 00:55:24,320
remember the good times.
1030
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:30,600
We were King, Queen...
1031
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:33,360
of the dance floor.
1032
00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:35,600
We were...
1033
00:55:37,600 --> 00:55:39,040
a head-turning couple.
1034
00:55:43,240 --> 00:55:44,840
[sighs]
1035
00:55:44,920 --> 00:55:47,920
[mellow music playing]
1036
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:03,000
[water patters]
1037
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:17,880
Erm, excuse me!
1038
00:56:18,600 --> 00:56:20,600
Shoes off at the door, yeah?
1039
00:56:24,800 --> 00:56:26,720
Those are not my dad's slippers, are they?
1040
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:29,040
No. They're mine.
1041
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:33,080
-He let me keep 'em.
-You don't have to wear them, though.
1042
00:56:33,160 --> 00:56:35,680
Yeah, well, they're kinda snuggly.
1043
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:39,640
Erm, do you really want kids?
1044
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:41,960
Yeah, don't you?
1045
00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:44,840
We never spoke about it.
1046
00:56:45,600 --> 00:56:46,920
I think we'd make great parents.
1047
00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:58,720
[vocalist sings folksy song]
1048
00:57:17,400 --> 00:57:18,400
God!
1049
00:57:29,200 --> 00:57:31,120
[folksy song continues]
1050
00:57:37,200 --> 00:57:38,560
Ah, fuck it! Bedtime.
1051
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:40,880
I'm coming to bed!
1052
00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:05,320
[folksy song continues]
1053
00:58:33,080 --> 00:58:35,080
[folksy song fades out]
74109
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