Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

(dramatic music)

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

- Were you aware that 100,000 people die each year

from irritable bowel syndrome?

That's more than the amount of people

that die from suicide and pneumonia combined.

- There's no way that's true.

I didn't think IBS killed.

- Oh, it's true.

- And where did you get this information?

- Are you ready to order?

- Yes, I'm starving.

- What's your personality type?

- I can't remember.

- Mine's ESTJLRT.

- And the extra letters are?

- Because I have an extra big personality.

- Oh my gosh, dating you is like

dating one of those gym machines.

- Leg press?

- No, the-- - Lap pull?

- No, it's like the-- - Stationary row.

- Sure, I don't care.

- Does this shirt make me look fat?

- What?

- You're getting off topic.

- I'm breaking up with you.

- But I'm in the most best clubs and schools and stuff.

- My Uber's here.

- Wait, are you for real?

I don't think she's coming back.

(mellow electronic music)

(breathing heavily)

- Oh!

- Well, Swan, here we are again

at the International Beats with Mouth Competition.

It's sure to be a good year.

What do you think?

- I think you sure look beautiful tonight.

- And so does my husband.

(laughing)

We have the Melodogs tearing up the stage this year.

- [Swan] Oh, you're so right it's wrong, Stale.

- [Stale] Look at them go!

(lively music)

- Found it!

- Cloney, look at you.

You're pathetic.

Your hair is an absolute mess,

you have lipstick in your teeth,

and is, is that a homeless guy tailing you?

I don't understand why you can't do

what I tell you to do the way that I tell you to do it.

God, the Musicats are doomed with you nitwits.

Screw up your solo, and I will get my revenge.

- Don't worry, if I screw it up, I'll get revenge on myself.

- You better.

(crowd cheering)

- Melodogs, stay!

Musicats, you've gotta be kitten me right now.

Why don't you take a meow-ment to appreciate

our purr-fect performance.

But for real, try not to mark your territory.

Ooh.

- Paws in, ladies.

One, two, three.

(meowing)

- I can't believe the Musicats

made it to the finals this year, who knew?

- [Swan] Who knew?

- This is the first all-feline group

to make it to the IBWMC, Swan.

- You are right, Stale.

- And this will be interesting, because the Musicats,

they can't typically meow their way to victory.

They're going to have do some real meow-capella.

(laughing)

People do think they sing well,

but I'm sure it's their finely-tuned bodies.

In fact, that's exactly what it is.

Have you seen the movie "Click", Swan?

I wish I had one of those remotes

so I could fast forward through this performance right now.

- Or we could pause time for us.

(farting)

(coughing)

(audience grumbling)

- [Stale] Look at that fog, it is so thick

you could cut it with a butter knife.

- This is a turn of events.

It's like driving over a misty lake

early in the morning.

(coughing)

- [Stale] Oh, oh, it's in my mouth.

(gasping)

(upbeat electronic music)

- Hi there, welcome to Morton Triversity!

What dorm?

- Uh, Bigtall, I think.

- Oh, so you're looking for 420-friendly.

So then you're going to just go straight down this pathway

and you're gonna take a left at the coffee shop,

and right then you'll--

* Then you shot that plain-clothes cop *

- You're in college, knock it off!

- Mom!

There's a cute girl over there!

- I don't care!

- Here is your official rape trumpet.

Just give it a little toot in case of an emergency.

- Cool, thanks.

Hey, what's your name?

My name's Wrecka.

Chinny Chin, is that your name?

Well, you don't have to worry about talking.

Don't you worry your little chinny-chin-chin.

Okay.

What?

- All right, Mom.

I'm gonna go now.

- It's okay, it's okay.

- Have fun, honey.

- Now, don't go joining any of those

a capella groups while you're here.

I always hated those groups.

- Okay.

- He's right, or we'll disown you.

(laughing)

- But seriously.

- Okay, bye.

- They grow up so fast.

- Chinny Chin, welcome to the Wrecka deck.

There's nowhere else that has this setup.

Don't touch this.

(mellow music)

(animal growling)

What is under your bed?

(playful music)

(knocking)

- Hey! - Hey.

- Brony.

- Uh, nope, Besse.

- Okay, um, maybe it's a lot, but you know,

there's nothing more majestic than the thought

of me riding a magical horse.

- Uh, I mean, whatever floats your boat.

- I'm not totally weird.

I mean, there's a ton of Bronies out there, by the way.

Oh, and I can do magic too.

Crap, that's not right.

(knocking)

- Hey, my sweet little girl.

It's been such a long time.

- Dad, I'm your daughter.

- Oh, oh, my bad.

I'm Wrecka's dad, Dr. Tickle.

I teach Tickling 101.

See how good I am at it?

- No, dad, dad, stop, stop.

- Let's show your roommate, come on.

- No.

- Tickle tickle!

Come here, come on, tickle tickle.

It works with Wrecka, come here.

- No, no, no no no, stop.

- Just a little more,

just a little more. - Stop, Dad, stop!

I said stop.

- Okay, fine.

- Don't you have a class to teach or something?

- I'm just making sure you're getting involved,

getting plugged in.

- I've got Chinny Chin, she's all I need.

- I'm leaving.

- I'm gonna guide her, so I'm gonna go with her.

Bye, Dad.

(playful music)

- Hey, wanna join the Bronies?

Yay or neigh?

- Bro, no, she can't join the club.

- Why not?

- It doesn't matter.

I'm not so sure I want to anyway.

- And what's that supposed to mean?

- I dunno, it's just kinda lame.

- You're lame!

You don't know anything!

- Hey, calm down, calm down.

He's triggered now, are you happy?

- Sorry.

- Bye, Felicia.

- But I'm not.

- I know the group you wanna join.

- As long as it's not the Punching Each Other

in the Face Group, then I'm fine.

- Oh, they're cooler than a Popsicle on a summer's day.

In Morton, there's only one true group of men.

The Melodogs.

(blowing kazoo)

The pit bulls of Morton, the kings of the dog pound.

- [Besse] So choreographed marking of territory, then.

(howling)

- That's right.

- Man, how is it that the punching each other guys group

can get members, but we can't?

- Keep it together.

There is a group of beautiful Italian Vogue models

just waiting to join, I can feel it.

I'm not giving up.

Where are the models that shave every four hours?

- And if they don't shave every four hours?

- Unacceptable.

- Hi! - Oh, hi.

- Hi!

Do you like a capella, can you sing,

do you know how to sing, do you like singing?

- Yeah, kinda.

- Okay, follow me.

* Mommy made me mash my M&Ms, oh no *

* Mommy made me mash my M&Ms, oh no *

- What's your name?

- Skinny Sally.

- You call yourself Skinny Sally?

- Yeah, it's so the other fatties don't call me Bones,

Twiggy, Beanpole, or Kate Moss.

- I guess we'll see you at the auditions then, Skinny Sally.

I guess she'll do.

(mellow music)

(gasping)

- Her!

- Cloney, I already have to put up with you.

How am I supposed to put up with that too?

- Hi!

I see you like music.

Do you like a capella too?

It's basically music.

- Um, it's not really my thing.

- Oh, but it could me.

I mean, we're just a bunch of low-key girls

who like to hang around, making noises with our mouth.

Okay, see, there are four major musical groups on campus.

There's the Musicats, that's us.

We're basically the best.

And then there's the Harmonuggies.

- [Wrecka] Harmonuggies?

- Who even named their group?

Then the Concertots, who for some reason

like to dance as babies.

And then of course there's.

Oh, I see you have a tattoo, I have a tattoo!

Of course, the tattoo artist was a little drunk

when he did mine, but.

- Okay.

- You should audition.

- I don't think so.

Sounds kinda dumb.

- Don't ever say that!

A capella is my life.

- She's sorry.

You should really come audition.

- We performed at the White House, you turd.

- Okay, it was a Lego model.

What I think she's trying to say is,

we're just trying to get back to the Stinkin Center

this year, and we're looking for a few good girls.

Think about it?

- Well, I don't sing.

I just drop sick beats with my laptop, sorry.

And sometimes I drop my laptop too.

- Think about it!

- I give up, we're done.

We are done, and I don't know how

we're gonna recover now.

- What, are you gonna toot again?

- I have this under control, okay?

(farting)

Sorry, I'm sorry.

- [Cloney] Laundry!

- Just go over and say hi.

- Okay. - Yeah.

- Okay, I can do this, I got this.

Stay calm, stay calm.

Just stay calm, okay, everybody stay calm!

Calm down, this is--

- I think they're cool, I think they're cool.

- Hi, I'm Kenji Orangebottom.

(laughing)

- I'm sorry, is your bottom orange,

or does it just smell like 'em?

- You guys sang for my 18th birthday,

and I've been touched ever since.

- You must have us confused.

- No, no, Thumper, I love you.

I love you more than the Beliebers love Justin.

When you sang "Happy Birthday" to me,

I thought I was going to lose it.

You're my idol.

Oh, and you got me into magic!

And now I levitate!

Can someone help a Brony out?

- Yeah, dude, friendship is magic!

- Awesome.

What was your name again, Kenya, Chia Pet?

Listen, I want you to do two more magic tricks for me.

Number one, make a barf bag appear.

Number two, you disappear.

Bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye.

(laughing)

- Peace out, man.

- Well, can I at least get your number?

Text you when I'm lonely?

- That's enough, let's go, come on.

Leave them alone.

That's a big dog, it's okay.

(mellow electronic music)

- Are you the manager?

- No, I just play my music here sometimes.

That's Duke, he's coming.

- Duke!

I'm Duke.

- Hi.

Does that guy come here often?

- Don't touch anything.

This is a campus radio station.

- Well, I'm Wrecka.

- And I'm Besse, hey.

- Hey, I'm Duke, and you're late.

- Duke?

Like, dookie, like poop?

(laughing)

You're kidding, right?

It's a joke.

You're not kidding, no!

Oh my gosh, that's hilarious.

Oh man, I can't believe that, that's terrible.

Did your parents do that?

- You get the first chore of the day.

"Pokemon GO."

I don't have time.

Catch 'em all.

- Okay.

I know you.

I serenaded you from my parents' car.

Yeah.

* But then you shot that plain-clothes cop *

* I heard a pop

- Look, chill.

Catching Pikachu is so overrated.

I don't know how Ash is still doing it.

- Well, I love "Pokemon GO."

- That so?

- Yep.

You don't think this is awesome?

- Can you just leave me alone?

- Well, I think we could become great friends.

Maybe more, who knows.

A little crazy night one night, you never know.

- There won't be more.

- Okay.

Well, I guess I will just peace out

on my magic carpet then.

(mellow music)

* Tiny robot armies taking over this town *

- Wrecka.

Wrecka?

Wrecka, wake up, Wrecka!

Ouch!

- I thought I told you not to do that.

- Why are you still in your room?

Are you skipping class or something?

- Well, Chinny Chin's keeping me company,

and she's all I really need.

- Meow.

- You need to join a club or something.

Hey look, the imaginary scuba team, try that!

- Um, I'm gonna be working at the radio station.

- Ew, that place blows.

- Well, I like it.

- Why don't you try out for the Musicats or something?

- Ew, no.

- Well, enjoy your lonely college experience, then.

- What the heck, you liar!

Ow!

- Oh, sorry.

Natural reaction.

- Your voice is freaking amazing, by the way.

You're auditioning.

- What are you even doing here?

- Oh, secret party room.

(upbeat dance music)

- It's a Mario party!

- Get out.

(sighing)

I'm trying to bathe, please.

- You were singing "Can't Ice Tea" by Pinny King, right?

- You know Pinny King?

- I love Pinny King.

His music moves me.

- That's great, just great.

- Keep singing.

(playful music)

Step aside, Taylor Swift.

We are winning the Grammy this year.

And I don't really care what Kanye has to say about it.

- Uh, not with a capella.

- All right, peasants, you will sing two verses

and one chorus from "I Need Some Shampoo"

by the Pear Tree Family.

- All right, maggots, line up!

- Sorry, he's all jacked up on

caffeine and steroids for finals.

Let's introduce you to our judges, shall we?

We have Laundry Mat, Tom Toddler, Barf A Lot,

and last but not least, Thumper Rabbit.

* Thumper baby

* Thumper baby

- All right, stop.

Oh, Musicats!

Meow, meow!

What kinda lame girls you got auditioning this year?

(laughing)

- Your mom, Thumper.

A ca shut up.

- Crap.

- All right, maggots, let's go!

- Chill.

I don't want you to just sing it.

Sing it.

- So are we singing it or not?

- Let's have the first maggot!

(playful music)

(gasping)

(laughing)

- And now I disappear.

- All right, that's all, folks.

You can all go home.

Leave, please.

- Wait, there's someone else.

No, not you!

- I don't really have anything prepared.

- It's okay, just sing.

(clapping)

(lively music)

- And new to the group, we have Ashy.

Skinny Sally.

Dennis.

Jenny.

Silly.

Racy.

And Wrecka.

- Wrecka, turn around.

(ominous music)

- Have you seen my grandmother?

- No.

- The big bad wolf, he's chasing me.

(wolf growling)

- We need to get out of here!

- No, we have initiation.

- Yeah, I'm outta here.

(screaming)

- Guys, this could be the major sacrifice!

The acagods have spoken of this.

This may be the new tradition.

(screaming)

- Look who's in the dog pound.

(laughing)

- That's funny. - No Kenji?

(shouting)

- Frickin' neighbors.

- All right, Musikittens, raise your right paws.

- I, say your name.

- [All] I, say your name.

- No, I, whatever your name is.

- [All] I, whatever your name is.

- No, let me show you.

(clock ticking)

So all of this bring us back to your name.

Cool?

- [All] I. (all saying their names)

I pledge allegiance to the flag

of the United States of America.

And to the Republic for which it stands,

one nation, under God, indivisible,

with liberty and justice for all.

- And no conversing with the Melodogs.

- [All] And no conversing with the Melodogs.

- You are all full-grown Musicats now.

- We did it!

- We did it!

(gentle music)

* Summertime just comes on once a year, boy *

* Doule Ls, double Ls

- Kitty litter, woo!

- What am I doing with me life?

- Are you nervous?

I can't believe they let my skinny booty in.

- We're all skinny.

- Yeah, but if I turn sideways, I disappear.

- Me too!

I can't believe they let someone like me,

with my ugly figure and body.

- What, you look good, girl.

- Oh, stop.

(laughing)

- Wrecka, Wrecka!

Can't believe you're here.

Man, thought you'd still be at the station with Duke.

Oh, no, but you're a Musicat now.

I guess this is where our story ends.

- And you're drunk.

- Nah.

- Where's your leash?

- Look, you and I both know this dog can't be tamed.

(howling)

- Hey.

I am so happy we get to share the same kitty litter.

- What does that even mean?

- I don't know.

But I am really sorry about Laundry.

She's been a little salty since last year.

I mean, if you literally lick her, she tastes like salt.

- Really? - Yeah.

- So if I pass out later, can you like, get me home?

- Yeah, I can do that.

- Okay, who would win in a fight?

Sharknado or Luke Skywalker?

- Dude, Sharknado.

Sharks coming from--

- [Skinny Sally] What's up, you two?

- Oh, hey, whoa.

- What are you guys talking about?

- I got this.

- Woo, woo, woo!

Melodogs.

- Okay, seriously, go.

I know what you must be thinking.

There's a lot of people that wanna make out with him.

Don't believe me?

You wanna make out with me, say hey!

- [Crowd] Hey!

- That was at least 12.

Say, say hey.

Hey, just say hey!

(dramatic music)

- [Kenji] How did you end up here?

You didn't make it into the Melodogs.

They could've at least invited you to the party.

This won't be the last time they see you.

Keep doing you.

- Oh man, who knew a capella would be so cool?

- Yeah, it's not like I'd rather be

playing "Pokemon GO" or anything.

- I mean.

I am in love with this girl!

- Really?

- I mean, uh, I'm in love with a capella, yeah!

* I'm anticipating the beat for every dance for eternity *

- All right, ladies.

Per our discussion last evening,

no one is to be mingling with the Melodogs.

Is this understood?

- That's going to be pretty hard.

They always come on to me.

- Racy, we will keep them away with our claws

if we have to, okay?

- No worries here, I'm pretty independent.

- No one has been Melodogged, correct?

(quirky music)

Give me your ears.

- But he asked me if I wanted to go to the dog pound.

And I didn't know.

- Hand 'em over.

- I did, I didn't know.

- Thank you.

Goodbye.

(groaning)

- Geez, trainwreck.

- Wrecka, this is war.

We don't need sarcastic comments

coming from the peanut gallery.

- Oh, calm down, Laundry, otherwise you're gonna

fog up the stage again.

- Wait, what happened?

Never mind, I found it on YouTube.

- Girls, we really need to rehearse.

- Okay, yeah, I know.

Come on, let's rehearse.

(energetic music)

* Hey, have you seen us lately

* Calling the shots even with an injured roster *

* Time to know, it's time to believe *

* That the time is now that we're gonna make 'em bleed *

* Top shelf is always open

* That's the place where Kesler rocks *

* The water bottle floatin'

* Daniel and Henrik are always causing pain *

* With a tape to tape pass that'll mesmerize your brain *

* Burrows flying at you with a hit as clean *

* As Mrs. Cleaver from that show "Leave it to Beaver" *

* Luongo's glove hand stick side pads are double stacked *

* Gives the opposition a scoring heart attack *

* We are the ones who will drink from Stanley's cup *

* C-A-N-U-C-K, C-A-N-U-C-K

* C-A-N-U-C-K

- Okay, that's enough.

I've decided to bring someone in

to help you get your solo down.

- Let's pick it up from "Auld Lang Syne."

Wrecka, just do what you can.

Here we go, five six seven.

* Would auld acquaintance

- A little trouble there, okay?

Here we go, five six seven.

* Would auld acquaintance

- It's "should", okay?

Here we go, five six seven.

* Should auld acquaintance

- It's "auld", should auld acquaintance be forgot.

Here we go, five six seven.

* Should auld acquaintance

- Not quite my pitch.

It's all good, no worries.

Here we go, ready?

Ready, here we go.

Five six seven.

* Should auld acquaintance be forgot *

* And never brought to mind

- Why do you suppose I threw a chair at your head, Wrecka?

- Uh, I'm not sure.

- Yes you are.

- The, the pitch?

- Were you on pitch, or were you off pitch?

- I, I don't know.

- Start singing!

* Should auld acquaintance

- Stop!

How dare you sabotage my band!

(distant percussion music)

Forget this.

I'm going back to jazz.

- Yeah, no one knows that song anyway.

(playful music)

- Um.

Hi?

- Hey.

I just saw you sitting here by yourself,

and so I thought I'd turn it into a date.

- This isn't a date.

- Well, okay.

We have "Cup," "Fun Dog Trillionaire,"

"The Brunch Club," "Stocky," and "Tar Wars."

These movies have some of the best

musical elements of all time, which is what I wanna do.

- Score movies?

- No, silly, I wanna be a mime in films.

You know.

I mean, it's niche, but I think I can succeed at it.

- Your girlfriend must be ecstatic.

- Nope, no girlfriend here.

Unfortunately.

- So are you gonna make me watch all these terrible movies?

- You don't like watching movies?

- No, not really.

- What?

Well, then we've gotta start with "Tar Wars."

It's a classic.

(clock ticking)

(lasers blasting)

This is the best part.

- Wow, this is really extreme.

- Yeah, I thought we'd get in a little movie time

before the riff-off tonight.

- The what?

- Welcome to the riff-off, everybody!

(cheering)

We are here to watch the Melodogs

take yet another crown at the great riff-off,

while the Musicats clean up their litter.

No, Pentatonix is not competing this year,

as we know they would kill it.

Am I right, right, yeah!

All right, ready!

The first rule of a capella.

Never talk about the riff-off.

There really aren't that many rules,

but if you screw up, you will get shot in the kneecap,

so just keep that in mind, the stakes are pretty high.

Greg over here will be taking care of that, say hi, Greg.

- Hi! (gun firing)

- [All] Hi, Greg!

- All right, now, if you suck, you are...

- [All] (clapping) Knee shot!

- Very good, everybody.

Last year's IBWMC champions, come spin the bottle.

(cheering)

- Melodogs, Melodogs!

- Rabies!

(playful music)

* Darling, darling can't ice tea *

- [All] Knee shot!

(screaming)

(sobbing)

- Wait, so any song, as long as it's in the category?

- Go get 'em.

- Dank.

- Cartoon theme songs!

* I'm singing for my dad

* Who didn't know I was born

* I love you, I love you

- I don't know what you're doing, but you're--

- [All] (clapping) Knee-shot!

- Yeah!

(groaning)

- All right, only two teams left!

Let's do this!

- You people are sick!

- Songs about chicks!

- All right, I've got this.

(lighthearted music)

(record scratching)

(playful music)

- You're so sad.

Unfortunately, I just don't like Justin Bieber,

so you're disqualified.

- What?

- You are--

- [All] (clapping) Knee shot!

(cheering)

- Melodogs, Melodogs, Melodogs, Melodogs!

- Oh, I should've flushed that Ted down the toilet.

- Oh, freak, this hurts.

- Chill out, Wrecka.

We lost, that's what really matters here.

- Well, I got shot in the knee for it,

that should count for something.

- Paws in, on my count?

- What number? - Three, five?

- It's definitely three.

- It doesn't matter!

One, two.

Meow.

- Milkshakes!

- [Melodogs] Milkshakes, milkshakes, milkshakes, milkshakes!

- So really, what I do is, I rewrite the lyrics

to whatever I want them to be.

And I know a lot of people call that parody,

but I call it artistic use of prewritten material.

And this is me screaming.

(screaming)

- Wow, that's something.

So, we're going to watch this movie tonight.

It's literally going to change your life.

(sighing)

- Fine.

I guess I'll give it a chance.

- Shh.

"The Brunch Club", 1985.

This final song here at the end made every woman

in the '80s pass out for three days straight.

It's so happy, yet so sad.

It even has the same effect sometimes today.

- Is that so?

- Yeah, watch.

(mellow synthpop music)

It's pretty crazy that it doesn't affect you.

- Well, I guess I'm immune.

- I guess so.

This is the best part.

Yeah!

Wrecka, Wrecka!

One, two, three!

Wrecka!

One, two, three, four!

This is the best part.

(quirky music)

- Sometimes, I nap under there.

- I'm gonna go.

* What comes next

* Rhyme after rhyme

- Cloney, Cloney, what is going on with your voice?

Come on.

- Remember the scene we cut?

I've got nodes.

- Yeah, I know, I read the script, but who is gonna solo?

- Why not Wrecka solo?

- Ooh, totes mcgotes.

- No, look at her.

She's a wreck, her name is literally Wrecka.

- Wrecka should solo.

- Wrecka would murder that solo.

She took the knee shot.

- Yeah, you did! - You really should.

- Okay, I'll do it.

As long as we do one of my arrangements.

- Um, no.

- Um, why not?

- Um, shut up.

We're doing "Rhyme after Rhyme," and that's it.

- Um, that sucks, and you know it.

Right, Greg?

- Yeah, that's right, Wrecka!

- Listen, Wrecka, my ultimate goal

is to take over the world.

My short-term goal is to get back into the finals,

and your little YouTube material

is not gonna do that for us.

- I have three million subscribers.

They would disagree.

- Ha, I don't care.

Here's what's gonna happen.

Skinny Sally, you're going to solo.

- Oh, ripper, all right.

(a capella singing)

- The Ghostapellas once again prove

they are a mystery.

- They sure do.

- A capella turned into a supernatural event, who knew?

- Look at that one.

I think he's a real ghost.

- Call Sam and Dean then.

No skill, I could do that if I wanted to.

- At least it's unique.

- Okay, girls, paws in.

Now remember, one, two, three.

(meowing)

(playful music)

- You know, Stale, as cute as those kittens are down there,

I still think it oughta be you out there instead.

- You're crossing some boundaries, Swan.

I for one think they look pretty good this year.

They must've changed their litter.

(chuckling)

- Well, let's hope they don't have another incident

like last year, that was a catastrophe.

- Absolutely.

In fact, everyone down front has a mask on

in preparation for the worst.

So far we're good, but this song is far from over.

- Come on, yes!

Yes!

Prepare for another disaster.

- Laundry sounds pretty good.

- Say that again, I will chop your ears off.

(cheering)

- [Swan] They always come out with a bang.

- They always do, Swan.

You might want to take some notes from them

if you want my heart.

- Ooh.

(laughing)

- I don't know, I just really hope

she's okay, you know, guys?

- Wrecka!

I totally saw them drag you off after the show!

- Yeah, how was prison?

- It was fine.

What are you guys doing here?

- We had to come support you, duh.

- I'm trying to nap, and they won't leave.

- I would just like to say that we almost got cut up there.

They really wanted the Ghostapellas to win,

especially after that supernatural stunt.

- Well, maybe we should do a different arrangement then.

- No, we'll do the same arrangement we've always done,

because I'm the big girl here

and everyone does what I say.

- What do you think, Greg?

- Do a different arrangement!

- See?

- No, and that's final!

- Do you see all these speakers?

They would disagree with you.

- No, we're not doing that!

- Yes we are.

- Pillow fight!

(gentle piano music)

(mellow electronic music)

- You're playing my song, you're playing my song!

You're finally playing it.

- Tight beats.

- I've always thought her beats were tight.

- I mean, it's a killer track.

It already killed my buddy Paco.

- Well, I knew it was good, so.

- Are you a Musicat?

- Uh, yeah.

I needed a club.

- As long as you don't start

spitting up hairballs, we're fine.

- She'll just scratch your heart out, is all.

See you tonight.

- Tight burn, man.

Sorry.

- I could eat these salads every day.

- You do.

Jinx.

Double jinx.

Knock on wood.

Holy poop!

Call Guinness, frick!

That's my line, stop reading my script!

- Hey, who's driving the van?

- Cruise control.

- Oh, salad slap, boom!

- Hey!

Can I catch a ride with you guys?

You know, I'd take my car, but I don't have one.

- Kenji, I think it's only for the Melodogs.

- Of course you can!

I know exactly where we can put you.

(screaming)

(coughing)

- Oh, guys, it's the Musicats!

- Oh, Skinny Sally!

Shouldn't you be leafing soon?

Lettuce throw, lettuce throw!

(laughing)

Bye!

- What happened?

- They just tossed and threw salad at me.

- Oh god, can you clean it up?

It's nasty!

- I might save some for later, but let's just go.

Let's just go.

- Um, let me get that for you.

- What, what is it?

- Geez, it's really in there.

- [Cloney] Sally, what's wrong?

- Uh, looks like we're out of gas.

- I thought you filled up.

- Well, that was before I got slammed with salad.

- Oh, WTF, you guys!

How are we gonna get there now?

Somebody wake up Laundry.

- Well, we could call.

(groaning)

- Musicats, how is it that we all ended up

crammed together in this van?

Oh!

You okay?

I thought cats always landed on their feet.

(laughing)

Oh, I know how we all ended up

crammed together in this van!

The kindness of my own heart, mm.

- I would take your heart, put it in a sandwich,

and eat it, if I could.

- Oh, you are a gem, like always.

But now it's time to tell a little secret

about Skinny Sally over here.

(blowing kazoo)

(singing note)

* I have all your weight loss photos *

* I will murder you if you do anything *

- Long story.

- I blew up the Golden Gate Bridge.

- Five minutes, Musicats.

- Guys, we don't even have to sing.

- All right, ladies, we just have to beat the group

that's on right now.

We can do this.

Wrecka, no pillow fights or surprises.

Let's go.

- [Stale] Wow, I think I'm gonna go snatch

that little guy for a date.

- [Swan] Oh, now, Stale, you know the five to seven rule.

- [Stale] Which is?

- Underage relationships will get you five to seven years

in the penitentiary.

- Oh, Swan, you are a joker.

Now, here come the Musicats.

Let's see what they do with their claws tonight.

(Swan meowing)

(playful music)

I thought they would've gotten the hint

about this arrangement, but here we are.

- It's an exact repeat of their last performance.

It's like they reused the footage.

(laughing)

- Whoa, what's happening?

Wake up, Swan!

- Oh, this just got interesting!

(lively music)

(gasping)

Oh, and boom goes the dynamite!

- It was, in fact, too good to be true.

I'm sure there's a catfight waiting to be had backstage.

(growling) (hissing)

- What the crap on a cracker, Wrecka?

- They fricking loved that song change.

- Yeah, until I fell off the stage.

- I can't help it you don't know how to walk in heels.

- It is not your job to pick the songs.

I'm the big girl here, that's my job.

- Skinny Sally?

- I mean, I always think you're very sexy,

so it's all good here.

- You are not a Musicat, at all.

- Laundry, stop! - No, Cloney.

It's okay, we all know we have Hitler as our leader here.

- Nein!

(speaking foreign language)

- Gee, Laundry, calm down.

I'm sure Wrecka had good intentions.

- Geez, you are always so handsome and so sexy,

but always so annoying.

Are you stalking me?

- Well, actually, it's a new app called Where's Wrecka,

yeah, but whatever.

- I don't need this, and I don't need you.

I was forced into this by extreme tickling.

I'm outta here.

- Are you happy meow?

(dramatic music)

(giggling)

(farting)

- Well, girls, it looks like we made the finals after all.

I guess that four-leaf clover really worked.

- Did you get a pot of gold too?

- No, but this leprechaun won't leave me alone.

- Well, I texted Wrecka. - What?

- I think you overreacted and owe her an apology.

- I'm not acapologizing.

She's not the leader here.

- Yeah, well, you're not always right.

- So what do we do now?

- We do it my way.

(knocking)

(soft music)

- Besse, I know you're in there.

I can smell the popcorn from here.

Besse, come on.

Come talk to me.

Um.

Look, I'm sorry, okay?

I've just been so irritated recently.

- Yeah, I know.

You've had quite a stick up your butt.

- Wait, really?

- Yeah, look.

(popping)

See?

- Wow, that's much better.

- I don't care, you've still been a major jerk.

You won't let anyone get close enough to you

to have any feelings.

- That's not true.

- Look, I'm done with whatever this is, so.

- Besse-- - No, sorry.

- You know, they say that Captain America is my dad.

- Melodogs, listen up!

- We already heard about the Musicats.

- No, I got bigger news than their hairballs, okay?

(laughing)

I'm moving to L.A.!

They're doing a knockoff of "Hamilton,"

but with an all-white cast.

Saw one of our performances, thought I'd be perfect.

- Okay, but we need you for the finals, man.

We need you, I--

- Shh shh shh.

Sorry, Melopups, but this hound dog

has got a new bone to chase.

I bet you didn't know I had these.

- Um, those, those are mine.

Don't leave, dude, come on!

Those were mine, you're my bro!

(gasping)

- Take that, Delta Pi!

No more pranks in my yard!

- Yeah, babe, show 'em how to take it!

- I thought Zac Efron taught you

not to mess with college dudes.

(groaning)

- Sorry, little dovey.

I didn't do this to you on purpose.

I don't hate you.

- Thumper dropped out, so there's a spot if you want it.

(dramatic music)

Hey, hey, calm down.

This is a good thing, hey.

Look, this is your time.

It's your time to shine.

Just don't do anything weird, okay?

- Okay, but I don't know the difference

between normal and weird.

- Okay.

- What is going on, kittens?

Cloney, it sounds like you've been smoking a cigar

every morning before breakfast.

- I have.

- [Laundry] Racy, your dancing has never gotten better.

Sally, you won't quit eating during rehearsal.

- Look, I got my appetite back, okay?

- And this one must be a mute.

I'm not really sure why she hasn't talked the whole movie.

- I asked the writers the same thing.

They didn't have an answer.

- I'm texting Wrecka too.

- You should do it, Dennis.

- No, I don't want her here!

- Whoa.

- Why do we have to conform to all these

old versions of our group?

- Yeah, let's just be us.

- Ditto.

- You guys think I'm a jerk.

I'm the jerk, I'm the freak obsessed with winning.

- Laundry, you are too controlling, and it's ruining us.

- I can be cool if I want to.

I can let go.

- What is she doing?

- I think she's gonna fart.

- Oh, here it comes.

(farting)

(groaning)

- You're unbalanced.

- You know it's not my fault, okay?

(shouting)

- Guys!

Stop!

What are you guys doing?

- Nothing, this is a Musicats rehearsal.

- I know.

Look.

I just came to say I'm sorry.

I was a bit of an acabutt, and I wanna be a part of this.

- Wait.

- Oh my gosh.

That was awkward.

- My dad was really rough with me as a child.

He used to beat me, you know.

(gasping)

But just in "Mario Kart."

But he would spank me too.

In "Mario Party."

Sometimes I would get burned if I didn't do right.

Because I forgot to put on sunscreen.

What I'm trying to say is, I know I've been mean.

- I get it.

- I shouldn't have been that way.

And Cloney's been blowing down my back

about it the whole time.

- I don't know if you realize.

(sobbing)

Sometimes I just cry uncontrollably.

- Um.

Hadn't noticed just yet.

But this is good.

Someone else wanna share?

- Uh, I guess I'll go first.

I'm a virgin.

There, I said it.

- Well, I'm proud of you, Racy.

But this is good, let's keep it going.

- Okay.

For the past two years, I've been hitting opium pretty hard.

- [All] What?

- I didn't actually blow up the Golden Gate Bridge.

- Okay, guess I'll go.

I was nominated for a Tony when I was 12.

(applauding)

- I haven't washed my clothes in years.

- What?

- That's how I got the name Laundry.

I never did it.

- Oh, honey, we can help you with that.

- Skinny Sally?

- Let's see.

I murdered like three people in high school

and I never got caught.

Like, never.

- Well, Wrecka.

I guess you'll be leading us to victory now.

- Okay.

But somewhere else.

Okay, Laundry, pick a song.

- Omi, Nosebleeder.

- All right, we can do this.

Let's see.

(energetic music)

- Paws in, ladies?

One, two.

(meowing)

- What was that?

- I guess I haven't tried to go that low

with the new throat yet.

- Hey, with the man throat, you could hit the bass notes!

- Yeah, she's all about that bass now!

- Thanks, Greg!

- Oh, and by the way, I learned how to beatbox

over spring break.

- Sweet.

- Great.

- Yes.

- [Swan] Welcome to the 2016 International

Beats with Mouth Competition.

- [Stale] This is the Stinkin Center, where all aca groups

come to win it all.

Let's hope there's not another fart fest.

- You've never been more right, Stale.

- Good luck.

(playful music)

All right, guys, we suck, but in a good way.

(laughing)

- Okay, let's go do this.

- Well, would ya look at that?

They've got my attention now.

Sorry, Stale.

- No apology necessary, Swan.

(hip-hop music)

- Well, Stale, it looks like my crush on you is over.

I'll be getting some numbers after the show.

- That's a lot of five to seven, Swan, but go right ahead.

(cheering)

- What a great ending to a great year!

- Cheers to them. - Amazing.

- Aca-yes!

- That's the new best ending to any movie.

* I'm coming straight out the end like *

* Know what I'm sayin', know what I'm sayin' *

- Scene 65, take five.

- [Cloney] All right, Melokittens.

- Musikittens. - Oh, Melokittens.

Melanoma?

(breathing heavily)

(laughing)

- What are you doing? - What?

- Whoa, wake up, Swan, look!

- Oh, well, now something's interesting going on.

Wow, that's just like, not even English.

- Because I messed it up.

(laughing) Okay, go back to sleep.

- You've had quite a stick up your butt.

- Wait, really?

- Yeah.

That's not it.

(laughing)

I grabbed the frickin' lock.

* Get the home with the best rap *

* 40 P, Shorty C, Soward Beach

- Thanks, Tyler.

(laughing)

- His name is Greg! - Whatever!

- Sounds like you've been smoking a cigar

every morning before breakfast.

Okay, sorry, I have to.

(laughing)

- I'm having a hard time doing the deep voice.

- Hey, with the man voice, man throat, and voice,

you can do the bass notes!

(cheering)

Woo.

* Fried chicken and fries

* So I make a naked cheese, had the pickles and pies *

* Diddy bop, magnificence tried, hard-headed *

* I'll never put my difference aside, uh *

* We're full of high school dropouts and college grads *

* Beats channel drive hillside out the Hollis Ave *

* Been getting all the truth like a polygraph *

* I be J2 double representing

* Don't you make up

* I salute 'em when I see 'em from the 40 side blocks *

* To the Ava Coliseum, go Queens Bridge *

* Get the home of the best rap

* Jackson Heights, Elmhurst, Ozone, LeFrak *

* And I got to say peace

* To all my family living out in Rockaway Beach *

* Astoria to Flushing

* Every day fresh and so clean

* We represent Queens now, man

* Go south side

* Through America we're in there *

* From the sinning to the women everyday *

* You know we're winning

* Go Bayside, get a home with the best rap *

* 40 P, Shorty C, Soward Beach, real deep *

* And I gotta say peace

* To all my people living in Corona, no beef *

* Laurelton to Briarwood, every day fresh and so clean *

* We representing Queens now, man *