Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

( helicopter blades whirring )

( missile whizzing, explodes )

( missile whizzing, explodes )

Reporter: Secretary of Defense William Cohen reiterated

his earlier comment that NATO credibility

is now on the line in Kosovo.

In Washington, the focus is on NATO's...

Reporter #2: As the military buildup continues,

American officials have publically warned

Yugoslav President Slobodan Milosevic

that he's risking NATO air strikes.

Reporter #3: ...spent the day searching for people

driven from their homes by the fighting--

their sole objective now that the latest

round of battle seems to be over.

Kosovo, however, remains...

- ( chatter ) - ( distant gunfire )

Yugoslavian air defenses are far more effective

than those of, say, Iraq.

And NATO wants to avoid sending a green light

to ethnic Albanians trying to break away from...

Reporter #4: ...whether the rest of Kosovo monitors group

is forced to leave Kosovo or not,

it won't be an easy decision.

Reporter #2: ...standing by.

International monitors plan to continue

their mission for now,

but the next few days will prove critical.

The United States Secretary of State has changed her travel plans...

The current standoff between the Yugoslav president

and the international community threatens

to derail this work.

The time has come for a reluctant NATO

to make some very difficult decisions.

Reporter #3: ...lobby ordered the head of the UN monitoring mission

to leave the country after he blamed Serb police

for the massacre of 45 ethnic Albanians.

Reporter: The international outcry at the massacre

has grown only louder since Yugoslavia started its own investigation.

Reporter #3: The defense secretary said he had warned Milosevic

of the strictest consequences

if he does not curb his attacks.

( gunfire )

Reporter #2: A funeral was held today

for the latest victim in war-ravaged Kosovo.

Mourners gathered along the rugged stretch of land

that had just weeks before been the scene

of some of the bloodiest fighting yet

in the separatist struggle.

The victim's father, who has lost

two other children to violence in the region,

cried out that he could no longer go on living

and begged for those present to end his life

and lay him in the grave next to his children.

Reporter #5: Yugoslav President Slobodan Milosevic

renewed his pledge to treat any mercenaries captured

in Kosovo Province as spies.

- ( grunts ) - ( groans )

( men laughing, speaking Albanian )

( cries out )

- ( bones crunching ) - ( groaning )

( chains rattling )

( groaning )

( men laughing )

( groans ) You gotta admire a guy like that.

He knows what to do with a rifle butt.

It makes me jealous when you get all the attention.

Well, I tipped him.

That's why he gave me that last shot in the spine.

( groans )

( rock 'n' roll music playing )

( men speaking Albanian )

( speaking Albanian )

( whimpers )

Man: I don't feel anything below my neck.

Why don't you just make me a little more comfortable

and then you skip town by yourself?

What, and give up my favorite dance partner?

- Not a chance. - I mean it, Karl.

Otherwise we'll both end up dying in here.

( chuckles )

( speaking Albanian )

My pocket.

That one.

From my last tour in the Mekong.

I want you to give it to Nicole,

my daughter.

I've been out of her life more than in.

Give it to her so she remembers

before I was a mercenary...

I was a soldier.

You still are, Macy. The best.

Help me out here.

Please.

( woman grunting )

I'll be seeing you, kid.

- I'll be looking for ya. - Do it.

( muffled groans )

( music continues )

( crying )

( gate creaks )

( gurgles )

( screams )

( yells in Albanian )

Come on, come on.

- ( laughing ) - Woman: I think you should.

- Man: Oh, yeah? - Right now.

Man: That's cool. All right.

Teacher: So everyone, in some way or another,

is searching for their father.

At least that's what Thomas Wolfe believed.

And this idea of a father quest is dominated

not only in his work, but in countless other works of literature

dating back to the Bible and before.

Gentlemen.

( laughs )

Thank you.

It's a very common theme--

trying to find one's father, then connect with him,

and ultimately to win his approval.

I came to college to get away from my father.

- ( students laughing ) - That's ironic that you say that.

Have you heard the adage before that women end up marrying their fathers?

Sure, they do... in Mississippi.

Put the ball down.

Josh, thank you for that scholarly contribution

from someone who obviously hasn't read the assignment.

You can stay after class. Maybe you can enlighten me further.

What I meant when I'm saying that...

women marry their fathers--

I meant that a lot of women end up with men

who remind them of their father,

whether it's conscious or not.

Is that not in one way considered a father quest?

Yeah, I went searching for my old man last week.

Where'd you find him?

Same place I always do-- passed out in a puddle of piss

with a warm beer in his hand.

( students laughing )

So you come from a family of intellectuals.

Students: Ooh.

Let me tell you something, all three of you--

playing football may give you a free ride in this school,

but in my class you are not going to get academic credit

for running pass patterns.

You're this close from failing this class.

All of you are.

And if you do, I just want to remind you

that the only football you're going to be seeing

is on the television in your frat house.

Think about it.

( school bell rings )

- That wraps it up for today, everybody. - Bitch!

( students laughing )

That winds up class for today. I'll see you all next week.

- Man: Dude, let's get out of here. - ( chatter )

Hey, come on!

Look, Miss Stewart,

I can't fail another class this semester, okay?

I mean, if I do, my father may cut me off.

All you do in this class, Josh, is crack jokes

and check out my ass,

neither of which is on the syllabus.

- Look at me, bitch! - Get out of here.

Get out!

Didn't anyone ever tell you not to play with knives?

Karl, you son of a bitch. I've been waiting an hour here for you.

Hey, Rahmel.

Damn, it's good to see you.

For a while there, I thought they got you and Macy.

No. Did you find anything on his daughter?

Yeah.

She's a professor at Eastern Atlantic College.

- Address and phone number? - Everything's in there.

Great.

You know, a disaster like at Kosovo

makes me want to do one thing.

What's that?

Go back for more.

Professor Stewart? Nicole Stewart?

Yes, my name is Karl Thomasson.

I knew your father.

Is there some place we could meet?

I have something he wanted me to give to you.

( rock music playing )

Lunch date stand you up?

Relax. We just want to talk to you.

Then call me during office hours.

- Jock: Ooh. - ( jock #2 chuckles )

You're new on campus, so you might be interested

in learning what's what around here.

Yeah, like Reality 101.

See, we've got a winning football team,

the first winning team this school's had in a long time,

and we're a big part of it.

Yeah, so why are you riding us so hard, huh?

Don't you got no school spirit, bitch?

I'm a college professor, not a cheerleader.

( cup clatters )

Jock: Are you even listening to us?

Jock #2: We make a lot of money for this school.

We pay your salary.

So you better get with the program

or it's going to be your ass that gets thrown out of here.

Excuse me.

I'm collecting for the local blood bank.

Anyone care to make a donation?

- Man: Oh, no. - Woman: Oh, no.

Eh, I left my wallet in my locker.

Well, I wasn't talking about money.

Ah!

Oh!

- Hey. - Jock: Oh, damn.

You're dead!

- Sorry. - Eh, no problem. Hoo.

Nicole? I'm Karl Thomasson.

- Hi. - Hello.

- What was that all about? - Oh, they're students of mine. Football players.

They're mad at me because I expect them

to do the same work as everybody else.

Well, if it's any consolation,

they'll be on the disabled list for a while.

Well, actually, it's not.

The school administrators encourage them to think that way

and the dean doesn't come right out and say it,

but the message is very clear.

Maybe you didn't notice, but those guys were completely wired.

Maybe it was coke, maybe it was steroids,

but they were totally out of control.

Why don't you let me deal with them?

I've had enough military intervention in my life, thank you very much.

I can take care of myself. I always have.

Like today?

Players: Break!

There's no way that bitch is going to pass us now,

even if we made up the work.

Yeah, my eyes are still burning from the pizza joint.

I'm gonna have to kill that guy next time I see him.

We've got to do something about that teacher, man.

- Get her off our backs. - Yeah, you're right.

What do you do when someone's standing

between you and the end zone?

You chop block his ass into next week.

Send him home on a stretcher.

Hey, what about Tony?

You know, Tony usually fixes things like this all the time.

Nah, I want a piece of that bitch myself.

Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about.

Just what are you doing here?

Your father wanted me to give you this.

Mm. Yeah.

I have a deeper relationship with my dry cleaner

than I did with my father.

He moved out of the house before I even could say his name.

He'd drop back in every two or three years

and hang around just long enough to make it look like

he was going to start acting like a father.

And every time I believed him, that phone would ring

and he'd be right back out the door.

He was a professional soldier and a damn good one.

Just like you, huh?

Look, I don't know what kind of deathbed promise

my father wrung out of you, but here and now

I am absolving you of your obligation, okay?

Okay.

I'd like to keep this to remind me of him,

except I have no idea who he is.

Keep it.

It means something to you.

( yelling, grunting )

( whistle blows )

( whistle blows )

( whistle blows )

Set. Hut!

All right. Keep your legs moving.

Man: Do it, Bo! Do it!

( whistle blows )

What the hell was that, Robinson?

You may look like the Michelin Man, but you hit like the Pillsbury Doughboy.

Now get in there and hit somebody. Come on.

- Man: Come on, Bo! - Man #2: Knock him on his ass!

( players yelling )

Come on, get him, Bo! Get him now!

- Come on, Bo, get him! - Knock his ass over, Bo!

( whistle blows )

Well, I guess we're just going to have to widen the bench,

because that's where your fat ass is going to be planted come Saturday.

- Everybody, listen up! - ( players shouting )

- ( whistles ) Listen up. - ( shouting stops )

If you're not willing to put your body on the line

every time you line up, I don't want you on the field.

If you're not willing to do anything and everything it takes to win,

I don't want you on this team.

- You understand that? - Players: Yes, sir!

Good. Because if you're not willing to put this football team

above everything else in your life,

I don't really care if you live or die.

- Do you understand that? - Players: Yes, sir!

Good.

- Robinson, are you willing to put your body on the line? - Yes, sir!

- Are you willing to do everything it takes to win? - Yes, sir!

- Is this football team more important than everything? - Yes, sir!

- Then get in there and hit somebody! - ( yelling )

( players yelling )

You hit or you sit! Do you understand that?

( grunting )

You're dead!

Man: Get him, Bo! Kill him!

Do it, Bo!

They'll be here in an hour.

( whistle blows )

- Okay, that's enough. - ( whistle blows )

All right, that's enough. Break it up.

Let's save it for Saturday.

You guys are lifting weights. Hit the iron.

The rest of you take a lap. Let's go, hustle up.

Man: Come on, man!

Parker, Phillips, come here.

Hustle.

- Phillips: What's up, Coach? - I just got word we got a random urine test

this afternoon for you and Parker.

Athletic Association boys will be here in about an hour.

One more thing, I got another grade warning report from your English professor.

Says you're about this close from academic ineligibility.

Now listen to me.

We're coming into the home stretch of my first winning season in years

and I can't afford to lose you boys.

- Am I making myself clear? - Yeah.

- We'll take care of it, Coach. - You better be.

- Now go get ready for the test. - All right.

You know what-- I wish someone

would make these guys take a random drug test.

- ( toilet flushes ) - Maybe they'd find a couple of female chromosomes

floating around in their piss and somebody could tell their wives about it.

- Here, I got it. Go get yours. - All right.

Dude, how do you get a job like that?

Man: Is that right?

( engine starts )

( chatter, laughter )

Man: Over here.

Psst.

- Hey. - ( screams )

Maybe hire ourselves out for a private gig down in the Gulf?

Work for one of those big oil companies, you know?

You're killin' me.

Good run.

Karl: Hey, that's Macy's daughter.

- She going to be all right? - Doctor: Eventually.

With the internal injuries she's suffered, coupled with the concussion

and broken ribs, she's not going to be leaving anytime soon.

Would you mind if we stay with her for a while?

Actually, it's very reassuring to have family around

when a patient regains consciousness.

I'll be back to check on her in a couple of minutes.

( heart monitor beeping )

( man yelling )

- ( breathing heavily ) - ( man yelling )

- No. - ( laughing )

No. ( groaning )

It's okay. It's okay. It's all right.

You're all right, okay?

Okay.

Well, boss...

looks like we've got ourselves a mission.

- ( knocks on door ) - Hey! Come on in!

- Good to see you. - Good to see you, Ed.

- ( dog barking ) - I'm on with my bookie. Hold on a minute.

Yeah, what's the line?

All right. Good. Give me 50 on them.

No, I don't care how many games they've lost.

- I do my research, pal. - ( beeps )

- Shithead. - Research?

Yeah, I've got a bug in his office and a tap on his phone,

so whatever he gets on the inside comes to me.

So what's up, fellas?

Well, we need to get inside the football program

- at Eastern Atlantic College. - Eastern Atlantic?

Yeah, and when do you need these installations by?

- Monday. - Oh, come on.

You know, you're really cutting into my weekend sports viewing here.

Sit down. Take a load off. Make yourself at home.

So, why the sudden interest in college athletics?

- You remember Macy? - Yeah.

His daughter's a professor there.

She was assaulted last night.

I think it was one of the football players

and I'd kind of like to know which one.

Eastern Atlantic. Yeah, they're having a hell of a season.

They've got this lineman kid, Bo Robinson.

He's built like a wall with legs.

Now, the word is he got this way juicing.

Sounds like junior's been taking steroids.

Yeah, that's what they say about every kid

that gains 60 pounds of muscle in less than a year.

- You know, I'm going to need back-up on this. - Whatever you want.

Rahmel will cover you.

I'm going to go in, get close to him.

- You're going in? - Mm-hmm.

As what? A janitor?

No, Ed. A professor.

I'm taking over Nicole's classes while she's out.

A pro-- professor? How are you going to pull that off?

I have a doctorate in contemporary literature.

- No way. - Way.

Oh, yeah, he's an undercover stealth teacher.

I could have been a college professor, you know.

You guys hungry?

- What? - Karl: Let us know when you got something, Ed.

- What did I say? - Rahmel: We'll call ya.

- So she said-- - Move it, punk.

- Hey, what's up? - Get your ass out of the way, punk.

Do you believe these guys?

Running around here thinking they can do whatever they want to you.

( chatter )

Oh, you must be Professor Stewart's substitute.

- Bill Braden, head football coach. - Oh, hi. Dan Cooper.

Man, get your punk ass out of my way.

Yo, Free Willy, wanna give me a break over here or what?

Man, what you say? What did you call me?

- Free-- - Oh, sh--

Let me tell you something now.

When you see me coming down here, you better step off

before I have to bust your skinny ass.

Bo, Bo, chill out, man.

You know Josh is my buddy from high school.

Well, he's about to get his beat-down.

- Jesus, man. - Sorry about that, man.

You just need to bulk up a little bit.

Bo, what's up? Word.

- That game was fat on Saturday. - Back up off me.

- Who you callin' fat? - Dude, Bo, not you, man.

Boy, you guys have really turned it around this year-- six and one.

- You must be excited. - Well, that's why I thought we'd have a little chat.

You got three of my first-stringers in the class you're taking over.

Now, from what I hear, you're a great teacher and we're lucky to have you,

but I've got to tell you, it's not an Ivy League school, you know?

- Have you got lunch in here? - Uh, yeah.

- You got enough for everybody? - No, just you, Bo.

Yeah, I don't need that.

You were a damn good corner in high school.

How come you haven't tried out for the team the last couple seasons?

I had to bulk up my grades, man. That's what I need.

Pssh, dude, if you're on the team,

you don't have to worry about any of that crap.

- Didn't seem that way here in Stewart's class. - Where is she now?

A winning football team provides good, clean fun for everybody--

students, players, not to mention the alumni

that contributes lots of money to departments like yours and ours.

Well, I think I get what you're driving at.

Good 'cause I'm just hoping you'll cut my players a little slack.

Like Professor McMurdo here.

He's one of our biggest boosters.

- Wayne McMurdo. - Dan Cooper.

- Follows every game. - When my schedule permits.

( chuckles ) So if you need anything, like tickets, just let me know.

Oh, don't worry, Coach.

I know this is going to be a memorable season.

- Bo: You got more money in there? - Student: No, man.

- You sure? - I gave it all to you.

- You got it all. - It's all in here?

- You sure? You sure? - Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Excuse me.

- You got it all. - You sure?

- Oh, yeah. - Excuse me!

( chatter stops )

Is there a problem?

- Are you talking to me? - Yes, I'm talking to you.

Hey, man, here. Sit your ass down.

That's the guy from the pizza parlor.

- No problem. - Then sit down.

Hey, do that again and you're out of here.

- And you'll fail for the semester. - Whatever.

- Ooh. - Man: Tough guy.

As you all know, Professor Stewart has been hospitalized.

For the rest of the semester,

I'm going to be her replacement.

Let's see how long he lasts.

My name is Professor Cooper.

Give me that, man.

Let's get started.

"This is the patent age of new inventions

for killing bodies, and for saving souls.

All propagated with the best intentions."

- Who said that? - You did.

( class laughs )

That's right, but not until after Byron said it.

- Man, who the fuck is Byron? - Now, can anybody tell me

how that relates to your last assignment--

the story of "The Quiet American."

- Yes. - The story shows us

how our failure in Vietnam

was due to our...

arrogance as a culture.

We overestimated our strength

and underestimated the enemy's will to prevail.

Good. Was that Cliffs or Monarch?

- Cliffs. - I like Cliffs.

Yeah? What does that have to do with anything?

( laughs )

Well, after Grenada, Libya, and the Gulf War,

a lot of people have begun to fear that that same attitude

is becoming prevalent again in America today.

Hey, we only lost Vietnam

because of hippies and draft dodgers.

And you wouldn't see that crap today.

- So, uh, what's your name? - Jeremy.

So, Jeremy, you're saying that domestic unrest

undermined the military abroad.

- Is that right? - Yeah.

And where did you learn that?

From one of your political science professors?

- "Rambo." - Man: There's a role model.

Nice.

"Rambo."

Hmm.

- Stand up. - Me?

No, you.

- Stand up. - No, you don't want none of me, man.

Oh, yes, I do. Stand up.

- Man: He's callin' you out. - Do it, Bo.

- I'm up. - Okay. Let's move these desks as far back as we can.

- Man: That's what I'm talkin' about! - Make some room.

- Move them back. - Take him out, man.

Yeah, nigga.

All right, now, Bo--

it is Bo, isn't it?

- Yeah, that's right. - Come on up here to me.

( class laughing )

( class whooping )

Shit.

Okay, now, we're going to test Jeremy's theory.

A second chance at the same situation.

Bo, you're going to represent America

with all of its military and industrial might,

and I am going to be a very small guerilla force--

no technology, no tanks, no helicopters,

sometimes no guns.

All I have is my will to prevail.

- Hit me. - Students: Ooh!

- Karl: Come on. - Slap him, Bo. Do it, man.

- Take him out. - You all heard me say it.

You all heard me say it. Didn't you, class?

Did you hear me say it?

I told him to hit me. Come on, Bo, hit me.

Yeah. I'm gonna enjoy kicking your ass.

- Man: Whoa! Come on, Bo. - ( grunting )

- Come on. - I told you to hit me, Bo.

You don't want a failing grade, do you?

- Woman: Here he comes. - Man: He's fast.

- He's gonna kill him now. - ( grunts )

Come on, Bo!

- Come on, man. - Get up! Get up, Bo!

Jeez, Bo. I'm disappointed in you.

I thought football players were supposed to hit.

Maybe you can only hit people when you're coming from behind.

( growls, yelling )

( gasps )

Well, Jeremy, it looks like your thesis

doesn't hold up to empirical research.

( groaning )

You see, a true guerilla force

- owns the night. - ( groans )

Attacking the enemy

when he's blind and can't see.

- ( yelling ) - ( gasping )

Oh!

Come on, man. Get up. Come on.

Now you all saw what I did.

I never initiated contact with the enemy.

I forced him to pursue me,

to fight me on my terms, not his.

That's how the VC and the Afghans and Castro

and even our own forefathers here in America

prevailed over vastly superior armies.

Any questions?

Good.

What in the hell was that all about?

Yeah. If that isn't the guy from the pizza parlor, I'm Snow White.

So he acted like he had no problem,

like he understood the situation,

but he was playing me.

He was playing me like a fool.

- ( car horn honking ) - Braden: I'll get in the faculty office

and dig up everything I can.

Let's go.

- ( beeping ) - Come on, keep going.

Hey, Coach, I thought you were going to meet a guy about those vitamins.

We're, uh, getting low.

I want two more of those sets.

Rahmel, Elvis has left the building.

Stick with him.

I have a feeling he's not going to the health food store.

Got him.

- One more, one more. - ( grunting )

That's it.

- ( grunting ) - Seven!

- ( others cheering ) - Eight!

- Nine! - Come on, come on.

- Push! - Come on, Josh!

Push!

( all shouting )

- Yeah! - Whoo! Yeah!

Give me some, Bo! Give me some! Yeah!

- ( all cheering ) - Right on! Yeah!

So while I monitored the locker room,

Rahmel tailed Braden.

And that's when he made this buy here.

Karl: Bingo.

Ed: Yeah, so I figured Braden would return

to the athletic building, and that was great.

I could keep my eyes and ears on him.

And I tailed the dealer and he was one busy guy.

Karl: And you think it was steroids he was dealing?

( scoffs ) By the gallon.

That guy could have been dealing anything to those kids.

I wondered about that myself, so I took up a collection.

And those are steroids, all right.

What happened to the dealer? Where did he disappear to?

- Sports bar on Soldier Hill. - The Brass Ball.

- Yeah. - Ah, shit. These guys are Soldier Hill boys.

Yeah. They're a crew that operates out of there.

They're run by this kid-- Tony Lo Russo.

They call him Tony Lo.

Yeah, and his old man is Vinny "The Brick."

He's a capo in the Marsono family.

- They operate under his flag. - Vinny "The Brick"?

Yeah. It's his weapon of choice.

You know, some people use ice picks.

He got his rep using a brick.

( laughing )

He's also got some legitimate businesses.

Earthmoving equipment mostly.

Where is this legitimate earthmoving business at?

He's got a warehouse over on Industry Road.

Ed, can we get a DV camera and a condenser microphone in the bar?

Something selective that can cut through ambient noise.

- Yeah. - Rahmel: You know, something that might be a little better

is to get somebody undercover in there.

You know, somebody that can get close to him.

I wonder what Andy's up to?

Are you fucking kidding me? You want me to pose

as a waitress in a fucking titty bar?

- No, a sports bar. - Yeah, right.

- Okay. Sports and titties. - See.

Come on. These guys have been selling illegal steroids all over campus.

I think there's a chance they might involved in the attack on Macy's daughter.

- I see. - ( grunts )

- Incredible point man. - That's right.

- What do you say? Come on. - Come on, Karl. Look at me.

I can't pose as a waitress in a titty bar.

I mean, in order to work in a place like that,

you've got to have a bra size bigger than your IQ.

Andy, come on. I need you on this one.

- Where have I heard that before? - This time I really mean it.

- Why do I always have to do the undercover stuff? - You're the best at it.

- Besides, who am I going to send in? Ed? - It's an idea.

Come on. Please. I need you on this one. Come on.

Gentlemen, tonight's specials are double shots of tequila

- and me. - I owe you.

Nah, you don't owe me.

- ( grunts ) - ( groans )

- Oh, boy. - You owe me big-time.

I hate when you do that.

- Hey. - What's up?

I'm from Derosa's Amusements. I'm here to fix your jukebox.

- My what? - Your jukebox. The thing that plays the music.

Oh, well. Come on.

Ah!

- You look stronger. - Mm. That's encouraging,

considering I feel like a freight train just ran over me.

You know, this is very nice of you and everything,

but shouldn't you be off assassinating someone?

Listen to me.

Your father saved my life more than once.

He was a good friend. Besides, I owe him.

I owe his memory, but that does not give you the right

to talk to me like one of your undergraduates.

You're right. I'm sorry.

I apologize. That was uncalled for.

( sighs )

- It's just that-- - What?

I've just had better days.

We're going to find the people that did this to you, Nicole.

Yeah, and then what?

And then you go back to leading a normal life.

You know, I've never had a normal life.

Ed: Okey-dokey. It looks good to me. ( humming )

- Better? - Mm-hmm.

You know, sometimes I say things that...

- You don't mean? - Oh, no. I always mean them.

I just shouldn't say them.

I do appreciate what you're doing for me.

- Honest. - I believe you.

I'm gonna go.

- Thanks. - You're welcome.

( intermittent traffic blaring )

Did you know that steroids cause testicular atrophy?

What do you mean? They make your nuts shrink?

- That's right. - My ex-wife

had the same effect on me.

( chuckling )

- ( chatter ) - ( machine beeping )

Well, what do you think?

I think it's time to go to work.

( coin clinking )

( music playing )

- Ed: Say hello. - Karl: Rahmel, can you hear me?

You know, you're very photogenic.

If that's an offer, I'm flattered,

but I already have plans for tonight.

( chuckles )

How do the Chinese eat with these damn things?

American fork.

Look at Andy in that getup. Madon'. I never knew that--

- knew that Andy was-- - What?

Well, you know, she's got such, uh...

- Ed, they're fake. - What?

- They're fake. They're not real. - No.

Karl: Oh, yeah. Watch this.

Andy, you're listing to starboard.

Perfect. Good.

If I had those, I'd love to touch them.

That's Tony Lo Russo in the baseball cap.

Karl: Mel, that's our target holding court at the bar.

( cash register dings )

No, I shit you not.

A Komodo dragon's got three penises.

- Bullshit. - I saw it on TV.

And there are three bitches for each male.

- One for each dick. - I wish I had three dicks.

Why? You only got two hands.

More peanuts?

Excuse me.

Thanks.

Whoa.

Did you see the headlights on that 4x4?

That's what I call an off-road vehicle.

- They ain't even real. - What are you talkin' about, not real?

She's stuffed like a fucking turkey.

- I say she's real. - All right.

I may be wrong. Okay?

The lighting's not that good in here, you know?

- Tough guy. - Hmm.

- Hey, Jerry. - Yeah.

Hey, who's the new meatloaf?

Eh, Susie something or other. I hired her this morning.

- Want me to call her over? - No.

- Why don't you just get the show started? - All right.

- Let's have a show. - Yeah.

( groans )

Andrea, you know, you look marvelous.

You really do.

Tony's asking about you, so keep workin' him. You're doing great.

All right, everybody. You know what time it is.

It's time for our girls to get...

- All: Wet and wild! - ( crowd cheers )

Yeah!

All right!

Let's bring up our first contestant... Tiffany.

- Here we go, baby. - ( giggles )

Yeah, baby!

- ( whistling ) - Don't worry about the water if it gets on the floor.

See, we collect it all and then we freeze it

and we turn it into ice cubes for, uh-- for cocktails.

So order up, huh?

Next up... the lovely Georgia.

( crowd cheers )

- Let her have it! - ( moans )

- Look at the size of those things. - Mm-hmm.

Don't worry, Georgia. The South's going to rise again

along with every one of these jamokes

in this room right now. Huh?

Man: Georgia!

All right. Thank you, honey.

Okay. Some fun, huh? All right.

Now it is my pleasure to introduce the newest member

of the Brass Ball Bar... Susie.

( crowd cheers )

( giggles )

May I?

Man: She's doing the Lewinsky.

Jerry: There you go! Thank you, Susie.

Let's make her happy.

Boys, make enough noise so the new girl wins.

Is our lucky winner going to be...

Tiffany?

Or is it going to be Georgia?

Get ready to clap.

Or how about the new kid, Susie?

( giggles )

Thank you, girls. Thank you.

( mimics barking )

Jerry: Our winner is Susie Hammer.

I'm so proud of Andy for winning that prize.

You know, actually, I prefer Tiffany.

Really? I would have thought Georgia.

( screams, gasps )

( laughs )

Jerry: Thank you, Susie. All righty.

I'm gonna get some of that.

Drink up. Come on, drink up. We're having fun here.

I like a woman who can turn you on

and scare the living shit out of you all at the same time.

I can't believe I just did that. I've never done anything like that.

- My heart is just pounding. - I bet a drink would settle you down.

- Come on, I'm buying. - I don't think Mr. Sundheim would appreciate that.

I'm right in the middle of my shift.

Jerry happens to be a personal friend of mine.

Matter of fact, my father and I are something like

silent partners here at the club.

If I ask, he'll be happy to do it.

Well, I suppose if you're a partner.

What's your name?

Susie. Susie Hammer.

( chuckles ) Hammer. Like bang, bang?

I apologize for these guys. Sometimes they get a little carried away.

Oh, that's okay.

Sometimes I get a little carried away, too.

Well, this is Petey boy.

This is Robbie. Smooth talker here is Frankie G

and that's Jimmy.

And I'm Tony.

- Hi. - Hi.

So what would you like?

Whatever you want.

Hey, Jerry. Champagne.

Tony, we don't have any champagne.

- Well, then get some. - I'll see what I got.

Excuse me, Mr. Lo Russo. I need to--

if I could have just a moment of your time.

- This is Mr. Kirby. - Who the hell is this guy?

- A professor. - What's he teach?

I'll lay you odds it's chemistry.

What kind of odds are we talkin' here?

Have you ever sought professional help for your problem?

- What problem? - Your gambling problem.

I don't have a problem. I never lose.

Mr. Kirby is very essential to my work.

He provides many of the raw materials that I use to--

- I can handle this. - All right.

Let's talk business.

Back in my office, though. Here, have a seat, baby.

- Hey, Jerry, you make sure she gets her champagne. - Jerry: Yeah, I'm on it.

- Let's go back here. - Hey, Tony.

Professor, why don't you have a drink? On me. Huh?

Yeah, it's just right back over here.

- Talk to me. - Cost of doing business just went up.

Yeah? Well, how high up?

- Double what I'm gettin' now. - Double.

That's a pretty sharp increase.

Yeah. Supply and demand.

I'm the only guy you got to give McMurdo what he needs.

So you're trying to tell me you're the only guy

on this entire planet who can do what you do?

- Take it or leave it. - Thank you.

Well, let me think about it.

( coin clinks, jazz music playing )

( sighs )

Isn't that nice?

Frankie, this beer tastes like shit.

If you don't mind, I'm just going to get rid of it.

Hey, mook.

- ( Kirby groaning ) - ( glass shatters )

You come in this place-- you try to lean on me,

you piece of shit. You little piece of shit!

- ( Kirby screaming ) - ( yelling )

All right, all right.

Clean this piece of shit up and put him in the car.

Rahmel, stay with Andy. Ed and I will take the professor.

Whoo!

I need a shot! Let's go! Give me a shot!

You want a shot? Let's get you a shot.

Let's go. Let's have some shots, little boys.

Let's go. Come on. Here you are.

- Thanks. - You're in great shape.

You must work out. I like that.

- Yeah, I love to work out. - Yeah?

- Do you? - Eh, yeah. I'll tell you a little secret.

If you want to really bulk up, you've got to juice.

- I like juice. - Yeah?

As long as I'm the one doing the squeezing.

Maybe you could squeeze me sometime.

Oh, a man like you I could squeeze dry.

- Hey, Tony. - Don't you see I'm talkin' over here?

Tony, it's your old man.

- Oh, shit. - Oops.

Pop, over here.

Hey, Vince. Looking good.

Where's the rest of the boys?

Tony: Takin' care of some business. It's nothin'.

Hi.

Susie, why don't you take your drink over there?

My father and I need to talk for a few minutes.

Oh, okay.

- I like your shirt. - Hello, sunshine.

Hi.

How's business?

- Business is good as always. - Yeah.

- We'll see. - God, I am so sick of this bimbo shit.

I could really go for a smoke right now.

- You don't happen to have a cigar on you, do you? - Fresh out.

- What the fuck is that in your hand? - Therapy.

Ed: I don't know. This professor doesn't fit in

with the other Soldier Hill boys.

- Shit, this Twinkie's good. - Karl: You may be right.

Let's see what he has to say about it.

( liquids bubbling )

Professor McMurdo, Wayne.

We're not here to hurt you. We're here to help.

You've been making steroids for the Soldier Hill boys, haven't you?

Did you see what they did?

Did you see what they did to that man?

- Ed: What man? - Kirby.

They kicked him, they beat him.

- They killed him. - Ed: Why?

- Why would they kill him? - For nothing!

Because he wanted money. He wanted more money

for the supplies he provides to me.

They said that if I stepped out of line,

- they would kill my family. - All right. Calm down, calm down.

We'll protect you and your family, Wayne.

I'm stuck.

I'm stuck. ( whimpering )

- I'm just stuck. - You're not stuck, okay?

Listen to me.

You help us and nothing's going to happen

to you or your family. I promise you that, okay?

Wayne: Who are you to promise that?

- We're the guys that are going to kick their ass. - He's right.

I'll see you tomorrow.

- You sure? - Yeah, I promise.

Bye-bye. So long.

See what I mean, Vince? We're barely running in the black.

- This here. - What?

What's this? This huge charge for office expenses.

Vince, every business has office expenses.

( laughing )

Jerry, you don't have an office.

- Jerry: Still, Vince... - Uh, uh, uh, uh.

Jerry, after what I did for you...

I mean, you were knocking down old ladies in the street

and stealing their social security checks

when I took you in.

Come on, Jerry.

You gotta watch it when you cook the books, Jerry.

See-- because sometimes...

- ( sizzling ) - ( screaming )

Because sometimes you end up getting yourself cooked.

You do that to me again

and I'll fucking roast you alive.

You understand me, Jerry?

- You understand me, Jerry?! - Yes, sir.

Get the fuck out of here.

What the fuck are you looking at?

Nicole: Well, if these guys are doing what you think they're doing,

- why don't you just call the police? - I will when it's time.

You know, the right way to do things isn't always the lawful way.

Yeah, but making up your own morality as you go along

is somewhat dangerous, wouldn't you say?

So are you saying that helping you is the wrong thing to do?

What are you saying-- my father was doing the right thing

when he abandoned his family and ran off to go play soldier?

Listen to me, Nicole.

There's a lot of things I can't tell you,

but I can tell you this.

Your father was a patriot

and he fought and died for his country.

I wrote to him just before he left on this last mission.

And I asked him not to go.

I actually got him a job on the campus police force.

I thought it would pay him the same amount of money

and he could be here with me.

I never heard back from him.

Do you ever think about that? Is that going to happen to you?

Are you gonna end up thousands of miles away somewhere,

all by yourself dying in some country that nobody's even heard of?

Maybe...

but then again I could get hit by a bus on the way to class today.

- We all got to go sometime. - Nurse: We got to go.

Well, Tony Lo-- right on time.

Hey, guy. Could have used you in the secondary last Saturday.

Yeah, with or without my piece?

Hey, I never had a cornerback that tackled like you did.

Yeah, well,

you never had one with knees as bad as mine either.

It was the only thing that kept you from being the best.

Listen, thanks for the help with Stewart,

and, eh, I might need your help again.

Her substitute's just as much trouble as she was.

Yeah?

What is it with these English professors?

( engine starts )

( grunting )

Professor.

Payday, my man. You got the stuff?

- Professor? - You got the shit or what?

All you had to do was say, "I got it right here, Frankie."

What the hell is this?

( electricity buzzing )

You know, you did a great job, Wayne.

And they totally convinced you were scared senseless.

Because I was.

What did you do to them?

- It was a kickin' chicken. - A what?

Wayne's worried about the boys.

Oh, they've just been hit with an electrical charge.

It's nothing lethal, unfortunately.

- How much is in here? - 80.

It should be $80,000.

Some for me, some for raw materials.

- Huh. - Keep it.

Payment for giving me my life back.

Wayne, I think it's time for you to take a little sabbatical.

I want you to take your family, too.

Until we get this all sorted out.

- Hut. - ( grunting )

( whistle blows )

Coach Braden.

Can I help you?

Josh Silver is dead.

What are you talking about?

He was using Anatest.

It's a veterinary steroid.

It's used on race-horses.

He took a dose that was meant for about three tons of horse-flesh.

Yeah, well, I'm not surprised.

He never did have his head screwed on straight.

Listen to me.

I know that Tony Lo Russo is supplying your team with steroids,

I know you're in on it, and I have video tape to prove it.

Look,

I don't know where Josh got what he was taking,

- but it wasn't from anybody on this team. - It's over, Braden.

You know, for years I ran a clean program.

Probably the only one in the conference,

and you know what? We always lost.

And then after last season, there was talk of firing me

and my coaching staff and phasing out the whole football program.

My career would have been finished.

Your career is finished.

You'll be lucky if you don't do time.

- ( chatter ) - ( door opens )

It's a mol-- a molecule.

Man: Damn.

Steroids.

They pump you up.

They make you huge.

Make you feel like you're the master of the universe.

While you're mastering the universe, let me tell you about

a couple of others things that they can do.

They can give you high blood pressure,

they can give you coronary disease,

- kidney disease... - ( chuckles )

...cancer of the liver,

they can cause impotence and sterility.

Not to mention diarrhea, acne,

hair loss, body odor,

yellowing of the eyes,

and the always popular withered testicles.

- ( gasps ) - ( groans )

- Bo: Withered testicles. - Karl: Having trouble getting a date on Saturday?

Just wait till she finds out what you're packing

in your shorts when you're doing steroids. Absolutely nothing.

Oh, hey, and I almost forgot.

One other minor side effect. It can kill you.

Not years from now down the road, but right now.

Today. This minute.

But, hey, don't take my word for it.

Just ask your classmate Josh Silver,

but don't expect an answer anytime soon...

because right now he's on a stainless steel autopsy table

down at the medical examiner's office

having his organs removed and dissected

one by one.

But, hey, he sure could bench-press, couldn't he?

Josh, man.

- Tony: Well, is he gonna come or what? - Braden: He's coming.

I left a note on his windshield.

Told him we had a meeting with the athletic director

and we wanted him to be there.

How you doing? You must be Tony.

That's Tony Lo.

I've heard you've been spreading nasty rumors about me.

Said I'm some sort of...

steroid drug pusher.

I guess it keeps you busy when you're not killing people.

- I never killed anybody. - No?

Oh, I see. So you're just here

- to rough me up a little, huh? - Nah.

We just want you to help us conjugate

some verbs, Professor.

Tony: Come on.

( blade clicks )

( clangs )

( coughs )

Now you got two choices.

You can take your boys out of here or you can die.

Don't kill me. Just don't kill me.

That's a good choice.

Hey, look.

Let's go.

Who did this to my son?

It was that professor at the college.

Braden wanted us to shake him down to find out what he was after, but...

it didn't turn out that way.

I want his body.

Where did you put it?

We-- he's not--

he's still alive, Mr. Lo Russo.

You bring me my son in the trunk of a car

and you tell me the person who did it walked away?

Look at him. He was my son.

Look at him. ( yells )

- You punk! You stinking bum! - Thug: Vince! Vince!

Vince! You got Tony to take care of.

- He deserves some respect. - ( groaning )

You punk!

- Punk! - I know-- I know where to find him.

The professor.

He rides around in this white van.

It's a piece of junk. You can't miss it.

It's usually out by the college.

- ( crying ) - Shh.

( gunshot )

Like that, Salerno.

That's how I want it done.

Just like that.

What the hell?! Throw the ball!

Where's Joe Namath when you need him? ( spits )

Hey, Rahmel.

If I have to watch any more of this game, I'm going to have to puke.

- Nice shirt. - ( machine beeping )

Whom do I have the pleasure of meeting? Hmm?

Your maker.

Here we go.

- There you are. - Thanks.

Thank you.

So I got you this.

I thought you might be getting bored sitting around all day.

Oh.

( chuckles ) "War and Peace."

Well, it's just the right-sized book

if you have a lot of time on your hands.

Oh, yeah. Have you ever read it?

Only in Russian.

- Well, thank you. - You're welcome.

So...

what you are up to now with all these gangster guys,

it's not really about me anymore, is it?

No, not entirely.

- So what do you hope to gain by this? - The usual.

Truth. Justice.

The American way.

( loud beeping )

- Something wrong? - Yeah.

I have to go.

( machine beeping )

- What happened? - He recorded it.

- Whom do I have the pleasure of meeting? - Your maker.

- Karl: Who did it? - Andy: One of Lo Russo's guys.

- What about the warehouse? - I know a way we can get in.

Karl: I think we've shown a remarkable amount of restraint,

but the time for diplomacy is over.

- ( intercom beeps ) - Hello?

- Man: Yeah? - Hi, um, this is Susie Hammer from the bar.

- What the hell do you want? - I have a date with Tony.

Tony's not here.

Well, then I guess I have a date with you.

Andy: Yoo-hoo. Hello?

- Hi. - So I guess you didn't hear, your boyfriend's dead.

Tony passed?

Yeah, Tony passed.

Since he passed, I figured you might like to express your sorrow

by giving head to one of his business associates.

( both laugh )

So you can start by taking that top down

'cause I like your tits.

Well, it might make me feel better, but who else is here?

I mean, I wouldn't want someone walking in on us.

No, they're all out back someplace...

- amusing themselves. - Yeah, how many of them?

See, because what I'm thinking is, instead of giving you head,

I could just give you a nice little...

- ( grunts ) - ( screams )

Oh!

( saw whirrs )

Plenty of room for junior.

- ( grunting ) - ( screams )

Karl: Okay. I got picture.

- ( grunting ) - ( screams )

- This little piggy didn't deserve to live. - ( bone cracks )

- This little piggy offended me with his dirty nails. - ( bone cracks )

This little piggy won't be sticking itself into any more female little piggies.

- ( bone cracks ) - ( screaming )

- This little piggy moaned as I killed it. - ( bone cracks )

- ( screams ) - ( grunts )

And this little piggy chose suicide over being alone.

- ( bone cracks ) - ( screams )

( bone cracks )

( knocks on door )

( moaning )

These tits... I bought them for $49.95

at the Pleasure Factory down on Ocean Street.

Ones with nipples cost more.

( grunts ) Don't get up on my account.

- Lookin' good. - Lo Russo's here for sure.

- Where? - In the back.

Karl: These trucks are going to give us some good cover.

Pretty deserted in there. Let's take them down quick.

It looks like-- what the hell is that?

I don't know, but I never get that on my cable station.

All right. We're going to have to get those girls out of here as soon as we can.

- That's the first thing up. - All right.

- We got a sex party inside. - Oh, Jesus.

- Damn. All right. - Andy: You guys ready?

- I came here to play. - Karl: In you go, girl.

Man: I think I heard something. Check it out, Jimmy.

( screams )

Ah!

( moaning )

Man: Come here. Oh, baby.

Hey, asshole.

Huh?

- ( grunts ) - ( gasps )

Come on, girls. Party's over. Come on, let's move it!

( katana slicing )

( whimpering )

( screams )

( screaming )

( screaming )

( bone cracks )

- Mel, I'm hit. - Ladies, I want you to do yourselves a favor.

When you get home, I want you to see a good doctor.

You got it?

- ( groans ) - Say goodbye, asshole.

- ( katana slices ) - ( screaming )

- Hey, guys, Lo Russo's getting away. - ( tires squealing )

Don't worry, boss. The car's bulletproof.

I'll get us out of here.

- What the hell was that? - That son of a bitch is on the roof.

I'll get him off. Don't worry.

( tires squealing )

( blade zings )

Salerno!

( tires squealing )

Damn it!

- ( groaning ) - Vince: Son of a bitch.

- Motherfucker. - ( engine starts )

( groans )

( yells, groans )

Come on! Come on, you son of a bitch!

I'll kill you, you fuck!

Oh, you fuck!

( tires squealing )

( yells )

Fuck you! ( yells )

How's that shoulder?

- Ah! - I've seen worse.

Easy for you to say. It's not your shoulder.

Hey, did anybody ever tell you

that these things are bad for your health?

( children chattering )

Hey.

- Hey. - Karl: Hey.

Nicole: You got here just in time.

They're just about ready to release me.

- What happened to you? - Oh, this?

I cut myself shaving.

- Oh, shaving your arms again, huh? - Oh, just down the elbow.

( laughing )

This is Andy and Rahmel.

When you're in trouble, two of the best people

to have on your side, and you did.

- Well, thank you very much. - Anytime.

You're welcome.

- I got something for you. - Oh, thank you.

Oh, Hemingway. "Farewell to Arms."

In Russian. I'm impressed.

Rahmel: Karl, we should get going.

Another mission, huh?

- Well... - Good luck.

Oh, hey, Karl.

- I'll take it if you still have it. - What?

My father's medal.

Reporter: Violence flares in the Horn of Africa

as Ethiopian jets bomb Eritrea for the second straight day.

More fallout from the Eastern Atlantic football scandal

as lineman Bo Robinson leaves the team and school.

This on the heels of the recent suicide of football coach Bill Braden.

Weatherman Winston Williams says we can look forward to five straight days...

♪ Next stop, Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale ♪

♪ Hale, Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale ♪

♪ Hale, Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale ♪

♪ Hale, Hale-Bopp ♪

♪ Hale-Bopp. ♪

( jazz music playing )

( music ends )