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1
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Subtitle made by KOBUS!
2
00:00:35,433 --> 00:00:37,235
- Hey.
- Hi, honey.
3
00:00:37,260 --> 00:00:38,926
What's in the bag?
4
00:00:38,970 --> 00:00:41,639
Oh, just some leftover cake
the guys surprised me with today
5
00:00:41,707 --> 00:00:46,076
'cause it's, uh...
my tenth anniversary at IPS.
6
00:00:46,144 --> 00:00:48,128
Wow! Really?
7
00:00:48,196 --> 00:00:50,648
Yep. I've been in a mediocre
job for a real long time.
8
00:00:50,715 --> 00:00:52,750
Give it up!
9
00:00:52,817 --> 00:00:53,985
I gotta say, between that
10
00:00:54,053 --> 00:00:56,788
and not finishing the
cake on the drive home,
11
00:00:56,855 --> 00:00:58,890
you've got a lot to
be proud of, my friend.
12
00:01:02,394 --> 00:01:04,662
Wait, today's your
tenth anniversary?
13
00:01:04,730 --> 00:01:07,932
Shouldn't it have been,
like, 3 months ago?
14
00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:11,468
Uh... no.
No, it's today.
15
00:01:11,536 --> 00:01:12,987
Cake does not lie, you know?
16
00:01:13,055 --> 00:01:14,488
Unless it's your birthday cake.
17
00:01:14,556 --> 00:01:16,924
That baby's seen 29 candles
more than once, am I right?
18
00:01:16,992 --> 00:01:19,560
Ha ha ha!
I think I am.
19
00:01:19,627 --> 00:01:23,748
No, no. I remember exactly
when you started at IPS.
20
00:01:23,815 --> 00:01:25,649
Because that's when
we started dating--
21
00:01:25,717 --> 00:01:27,268
Summer of '95.
22
00:01:27,336 --> 00:01:28,802
Remember,
you didn't shower much
23
00:01:28,870 --> 00:01:30,938
'cause you said
you were grunge?
24
00:01:31,006 --> 00:01:33,708
Today, 3 months ago--
What's the difference, really?
25
00:01:33,775 --> 00:01:35,326
There's a big
difference, Doug, OK?
26
00:01:35,393 --> 00:01:38,462
A lot of pension and benefits stuff
kicks in at the 10-year mark,
27
00:01:38,530 --> 00:01:41,065
which means IPS
is 3 months behind.
28
00:01:41,133 --> 00:01:42,834
I'm gonna leave a
message for accounting.
29
00:01:42,901 --> 00:01:43,832
Uh, you know, that's OK.
30
00:01:43,857 --> 00:01:45,461
I'll just-I'll take
care of it tomorrow.
31
00:01:45,486 --> 00:01:47,120
Nah.
You'll never do it.
32
00:01:48,256 --> 00:01:50,657
Let me tell you a story.
33
00:01:53,395 --> 00:01:55,562
Come on, I thought it
was a really good movie.
34
00:01:55,630 --> 00:01:57,470
You know what?
I think it should've been called
35
00:01:57,495 --> 00:01:58,883
waiting to exhale into my hand.
36
00:01:58,951 --> 00:02:00,685
Pffffft!
37
00:02:01,753 --> 00:02:03,321
I love when you do that.
38
00:02:04,906 --> 00:02:06,940
I had a really
great time tonight.
39
00:02:07,008 --> 00:02:08,576
Me, too.
40
00:02:16,368 --> 00:02:18,069
So, uh...
41
00:02:18,136 --> 00:02:19,437
What now?
42
00:02:20,905 --> 00:02:22,740
So, now you go home.
43
00:02:22,808 --> 00:02:25,542
Oh, come on, we've been going
out for, like, 2 months, Carrie.
44
00:02:25,610 --> 00:02:28,412
My whole body's blue.
45
00:02:37,456 --> 00:02:40,424
I gotta get up early
for work tomorrow.
46
00:02:40,492 --> 00:02:41,420
Just call in sick.
47
00:02:41,445 --> 00:02:46,680
Tell them you came down with a
bad case of Doug-onucleosis.
48
00:02:46,748 --> 00:02:47,882
Good night, Doug.
49
00:02:53,571 --> 00:02:55,372
Mmm.
50
00:02:55,440 --> 00:02:56,323
Come on!
51
00:02:56,391 --> 00:02:57,924
Good night, Doug.
52
00:03:02,130 --> 00:03:03,864
OK...
53
00:03:16,511 --> 00:03:19,213
Hey, guys, before I sit
down, you should both know
54
00:03:19,281 --> 00:03:21,815
I haven't seen last
night's Melrose Place yet,
55
00:03:21,883 --> 00:03:24,568
so if anyone says anything,
I will officially freak.
56
00:03:24,636 --> 00:03:26,987
Ah, Doug, I hate
to bring it up now,
57
00:03:27,055 --> 00:03:28,889
but your tab,
it's running kind of high.
58
00:03:28,957 --> 00:03:32,209
I can't pay a tab if I
don't have a job, Einstein.
59
00:03:32,276 --> 00:03:33,894
Well, we're hiring
down in the subway.
60
00:03:33,962 --> 00:03:35,402
Thanks, but I'm
holding out for a job
61
00:03:35,427 --> 00:03:37,264
that doesn't involve
walking through urine.
62
00:03:37,332 --> 00:03:39,516
Oh, la-di-da.
63
00:03:39,584 --> 00:03:42,652
So, how are things going
with the new lady?
64
00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,606
Oh, Carrie? Great. She's so sweet.
Great sense of humor.
65
00:03:45,674 --> 00:03:49,710
When I make my belly button
talk, she really gets it.
66
00:03:49,778 --> 00:03:51,696
And how is everything in...
Horizontal town?
67
00:03:51,763 --> 00:03:54,798
Oh, come on. I don't like to talk
about that kind of stuff, all right?
68
00:03:54,866 --> 00:03:57,234
Oh, come on. I need something
to keep my mind off Melrose.
69
00:03:57,302 --> 00:03:59,870
All right,
well, let's just say--
70
00:03:59,938 --> 00:04:01,939
Not to get too graphic--
71
00:04:02,007 --> 00:04:04,658
But I've gotten more
off of you two.
72
00:04:04,726 --> 00:04:07,711
Ha ha ha!
Whoa! Man!
73
00:04:07,779 --> 00:04:10,139
And you guys have been going
out for, like, 2 months, right?
74
00:04:10,207 --> 00:04:12,007
It's a little rough,
but Carrie wants to wait.
75
00:04:12,032 --> 00:04:15,810
And I respect the fact that
Carrie's a good girl, you know?
76
00:04:17,572 --> 00:04:19,957
- What was that?
- What?
77
00:04:21,610 --> 00:04:22,976
What's going on here?
78
00:04:23,044 --> 00:04:25,696
Well, word on the street
is that waiting...
79
00:04:25,764 --> 00:04:27,431
Isn't Carrie's thing.
80
00:04:27,498 --> 00:04:30,178
You watch your mouth. I swear to
god, I'll cut you 8 different ways.
81
00:04:30,203 --> 00:04:30,968
- It's true!
- Yeah?
82
00:04:31,036 --> 00:04:32,870
Who's she been with?
Give me one name.
83
00:04:32,938 --> 00:04:34,120
Sal Derobertis.
84
00:04:34,188 --> 00:04:36,357
Sal? I thought it was
his brother Johnny.
85
00:04:36,424 --> 00:04:38,643
Sal and Johnny.
He only asked for one name.
86
00:04:38,710 --> 00:04:40,177
You guys don't know what
you're talking about, all right?
87
00:04:40,245 --> 00:04:43,013
She's a good girl, and she
wants to wait, and that's it!
88
00:04:43,081 --> 00:04:44,982
- OK.
- It is "OK." Yeah.
89
00:04:45,050 --> 00:04:46,930
And you know what else?
Here's a Melrose update--
90
00:04:46,985 --> 00:04:49,546
Yeah, Allison got Amanda's job and
slept with Billy in her office.
91
00:04:49,571 --> 00:04:51,105
Yeah!
92
00:05:03,735 --> 00:05:05,235
Uh... ow!
93
00:05:05,303 --> 00:05:07,458
- What are you doing?
- I'm sorry.
94
00:05:07,483 --> 00:05:10,524
You looked uncomfortable,
so I thought, uh...
95
00:05:10,592 --> 00:05:13,827
You thought I'd be more
comfortable without a bra?
96
00:05:13,895 --> 00:05:15,946
I know I am.
97
00:05:16,014 --> 00:05:16,697
Come on.
98
00:05:16,765 --> 00:05:18,315
Doug, come on.
Look, I told you,
99
00:05:18,383 --> 00:05:20,351
I'm just not ready yet, OK?
100
00:05:20,418 --> 00:05:22,886
I'm sorry.
That's just the way I am.
101
00:05:22,954 --> 00:05:25,289
Yeah, that's the book on you.
102
00:05:27,725 --> 00:05:29,826
What's that supposed to mean?
103
00:05:29,894 --> 00:05:31,362
Nothing. It's just...
I don't know.
104
00:05:31,430 --> 00:05:33,797
I just heard that bra used
to come off a little easier.
105
00:05:33,865 --> 00:05:36,067
You know what I'm sayin'?
Like, bing!
106
00:05:37,202 --> 00:05:40,837
Are you calling me a--
A slut?
107
00:05:40,905 --> 00:05:44,108
Not me.
Spence and Danny.
108
00:05:44,176 --> 00:05:45,175
Like they know me.
109
00:05:45,243 --> 00:05:49,446
They know the Derobertis brothers
and apparently, so do you.
110
00:05:49,514 --> 00:05:49,994
You know what?
111
00:05:50,019 --> 00:05:52,725
- That's really none of your business.
- It is my business, Carrie.
112
00:05:52,734 --> 00:05:54,174
If you won't sleep
with me, you know,
113
00:05:54,199 --> 00:05:56,851
but you'll sleep with half
the Derobertis-is-is.
114
00:05:58,206 --> 00:06:00,241
Maybe that's because
they were smart enough
115
00:06:00,308 --> 00:06:04,945
to figure out after an hour
that my bra opens in the front!
116
00:06:05,013 --> 00:06:07,893
OK, you wear a bra that opens in the
front, but you're not a slut. Right.
117
00:06:07,916 --> 00:06:10,183
You know what?
118
00:06:10,251 --> 00:06:11,611
You better back off
the slut thing,
119
00:06:11,678 --> 00:06:15,456
or you're gonna find yourself in
the trunk of Gino Derobertis' car.
120
00:06:15,523 --> 00:06:18,659
Gino?
You slept with the uncle also?!
121
00:06:18,727 --> 00:06:21,328
They're a nice family, OK?
122
00:06:21,395 --> 00:06:23,264
Carrie, what the hell's
goin' on here?!
123
00:06:23,331 --> 00:06:25,299
All right, maybe I hooked up
124
00:06:25,366 --> 00:06:27,668
with a lot more guys than
I should've, all right?
125
00:06:27,736 --> 00:06:29,053
I don't know why I did it.
126
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:32,856
Maybe it's 'cause my mom
died, and my dad's crazy.
127
00:06:32,924 --> 00:06:34,444
I had a separate
entrance to the house.
128
00:06:34,493 --> 00:06:35,893
I don't know!
129
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,329
The point is,
130
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,148
I don't want to be
like that anymore, OK?
131
00:06:41,215 --> 00:06:44,852
I want to be in a grown-up
relationship with one guy,
132
00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:47,772
and I think I want
that guy to be you.
133
00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:49,824
Let me be your grown-up.
Come on, let's go.
134
00:06:49,891 --> 00:06:51,576
No, Doug!
Come on!
135
00:06:51,601 --> 00:06:55,217
I just told you, I wanna be
in a grown-up relationship.
136
00:06:55,241 --> 00:06:58,098
- You're not a grown-up.
- What are you talking about?
137
00:06:58,166 --> 00:07:01,185
Yeah, you don't have any plans,
you don't have any goals.
138
00:07:01,253 --> 00:07:02,533
I got plans.
I got lots of goals.
139
00:07:02,558 --> 00:07:04,755
Oh, OK. You don't
even have a job.
140
00:07:04,822 --> 00:07:07,490
Yes, I do.
141
00:07:07,558 --> 00:07:08,709
What?
142
00:07:08,776 --> 00:07:11,461
I was gonna surprise you...
tomorrow, after my first day.
143
00:07:11,529 --> 00:07:14,497
I can't believe that's
what this is all about!
144
00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:18,069
Wait.
145
00:07:18,136 --> 00:07:20,438
Are you serious?
146
00:07:20,505 --> 00:07:22,806
Yes, I'm serious.
147
00:07:24,842 --> 00:07:27,844
Carrie, before I met you, I--
148
00:07:27,912 --> 00:07:30,214
I just liked hanging out
at a pizza place,
149
00:07:30,282 --> 00:07:31,949
but now...
150
00:07:32,016 --> 00:07:33,884
I want more.
151
00:07:37,322 --> 00:07:39,422
More for myself...
152
00:07:39,490 --> 00:07:41,759
More for you...
153
00:07:41,826 --> 00:07:44,094
More for us.
154
00:07:50,852 --> 00:07:52,519
Wait, so...
What's the job?
155
00:07:52,587 --> 00:07:53,987
Shh.
OK.
156
00:07:58,309 --> 00:07:59,926
Mmm...
157
00:07:59,994 --> 00:08:01,528
Mmm.
158
00:08:01,596 --> 00:08:04,197
- Morning.
- Morning.
159
00:08:04,265 --> 00:08:06,266
Whatcha thinkin'?
160
00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:08,654
I'm thinking if I hadn't downed
all those Zimas last night,
161
00:08:08,679 --> 00:08:11,348
I'd stay in bed
with you forever.
162
00:08:12,757 --> 00:08:14,858
Oh, my god.
I'm gonna be late for work.
163
00:08:16,494 --> 00:08:18,161
Oh, yeah.
164
00:08:20,498 --> 00:08:21,732
Hon?
165
00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:24,234
- Yeah.
- Um...
166
00:08:24,302 --> 00:08:26,670
Aren't you gonna be late, too?
167
00:08:26,738 --> 00:08:28,038
Late for what?
168
00:08:28,105 --> 00:08:29,573
For work!
169
00:08:29,641 --> 00:08:31,608
Oh, that's right.
Work, work.
170
00:08:31,676 --> 00:08:33,294
My new work!
171
00:08:33,361 --> 00:08:34,494
Oh, yeah.
172
00:08:34,562 --> 00:08:39,211
OK, so, now that our hormones
aren't raging, tell me.
173
00:08:39,236 --> 00:08:40,591
Tell you what?
174
00:08:40,635 --> 00:08:42,236
What your new job is.
175
00:08:42,304 --> 00:08:44,104
- I never told you?!
- No.
176
00:08:44,172 --> 00:08:46,023
Oh, that is hilarious!
177
00:08:49,394 --> 00:08:50,728
Now, I gotta be
honest with you,
178
00:08:50,795 --> 00:08:53,146
I have been
fantasizing architect,
179
00:08:53,214 --> 00:08:55,015
'cause I've always had
a crush on Mr. Brady,
180
00:08:55,083 --> 00:08:58,385
but I'm realistic,
so-tell me.
181
00:08:58,453 --> 00:09:00,087
Well, it's a good job.
182
00:09:00,112 --> 00:09:04,141
It's, uh, right down there
in the, uh, job district.
183
00:09:04,209 --> 00:09:06,543
Job district.
Just tell me.
184
00:09:06,611 --> 00:09:10,714
I will tell you if you let
me get a word in edgewise.
185
00:09:16,688 --> 00:09:19,590
Oh, my god. You didn't
make up some fake job
186
00:09:19,658 --> 00:09:22,225
just so that I would
sleep with you, did you?
187
00:09:22,293 --> 00:09:24,645
Did-what-did I--
Make up-Carr--
188
00:09:24,712 --> 00:09:26,780
Wow, my head is spinning.
Whoa.
189
00:09:26,847 --> 00:09:28,849
- You did, didn't you?!
- No!
190
00:09:28,917 --> 00:09:30,517
All right, so, then just
tell me where you work!
191
00:09:30,584 --> 00:09:31,744
Oh, you wanna take that tone,
192
00:09:31,769 --> 00:09:34,053
you just lost the right
to know where I work, OK?
193
00:09:34,121 --> 00:09:35,105
What are you doing?
194
00:09:35,173 --> 00:09:38,409
What am I doing?
I'm getting ready for my...
195
00:09:38,476 --> 00:09:41,011
"Fake job"...
196
00:09:41,162 --> 00:09:43,196
That I "made up"!
197
00:09:45,232 --> 00:09:46,600
OK?
198
00:09:46,668 --> 00:09:50,003
Just give me a company name!
199
00:09:50,071 --> 00:09:52,791
Oh, you want a name? It's a small
business. Maybe you've heard of it?
200
00:09:52,816 --> 00:09:55,217
It's called shutty industries!
201
00:09:59,013 --> 00:10:01,798
She ever ask the Derobertis
boys if they have jobs?
202
00:10:01,866 --> 00:10:06,436
No. But I gotta have a job
'cause I'm not a Derobertis.
203
00:10:06,504 --> 00:10:09,189
Derobertis.
204
00:10:09,257 --> 00:10:11,775
It's a cool name.
205
00:10:11,842 --> 00:10:14,511
Doug Derobertis.
206
00:10:18,516 --> 00:10:20,250
Oh, my god.
She's following me.
207
00:10:20,318 --> 00:10:22,519
Oh, this chick
has trust issues.
208
00:10:22,586 --> 00:10:23,954
OK, job, job, job.
209
00:10:24,022 --> 00:10:26,223
Gotta find a job.
210
00:10:39,454 --> 00:10:41,087
That wouldn't end well.
211
00:10:43,892 --> 00:10:45,292
Yeah.
212
00:10:47,328 --> 00:10:48,662
Damn it!
213
00:11:08,132 --> 00:11:09,332
Hey, I, uh, hate
to bother you,
214
00:11:09,357 --> 00:11:11,635
but can I, uh,
borrow a uniform?
215
00:11:11,703 --> 00:11:13,337
Do I know you?
216
00:11:13,404 --> 00:11:15,422
No.
Anyway...
217
00:11:15,490 --> 00:11:17,156
Extra uniform, can I have one?
218
00:11:17,224 --> 00:11:18,859
No.
219
00:11:18,926 --> 00:11:21,246
Please, you have to, man.
My girlfriend's following me, OK?
220
00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:23,794
And if I don't convince her that
I work here, I'm dead. Please!
221
00:11:23,819 --> 00:11:26,332
I'm not giving my uniform
to a total stranger.
222
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,902
I'll give you some gum.
You want some gum?
223
00:11:28,970 --> 00:11:29,970
No, I don't want any gum.
224
00:11:30,021 --> 00:11:31,772
Well, how about this?
I got a coupon.
225
00:11:31,839 --> 00:11:33,599
"Buy a whopper, get
the second whopper free."
226
00:11:33,624 --> 00:11:35,308
Second whopper free!
227
00:11:35,376 --> 00:11:39,747
Look, man, you're weird,
and I don't like you.
228
00:11:39,814 --> 00:11:42,816
So, why don't you take your
coupon and your funky-ass gum
229
00:11:42,884 --> 00:11:44,517
and get on out of here?
230
00:12:03,337 --> 00:12:06,172
Carrie.
What are you doin' here?
231
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:07,340
I followed you.
232
00:12:07,408 --> 00:12:10,110
So, do you actually work here?
233
00:12:10,178 --> 00:12:11,498
No, I just walked
in this building
234
00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:14,264
and put on some guy's shirt.
235
00:12:14,332 --> 00:12:16,500
Hey!
What the hell are you doin'?
236
00:12:16,568 --> 00:12:18,435
I know, guy.
I'm sorry. Uh,
237
00:12:18,503 --> 00:12:19,703
just gettin' dressed
here, and, uh,
238
00:12:19,770 --> 00:12:21,210
I know we're supposed
to go out there
239
00:12:21,235 --> 00:12:23,019
and make those deliveries
and stuff, right?
240
00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:31,047
All right, what the hell
is going on here?
241
00:12:31,115 --> 00:12:32,282
Does he work here or not?
242
00:12:32,350 --> 00:12:34,334
Just tell me,
because if he doesn't,
243
00:12:34,401 --> 00:12:36,186
I'm gonna twist
his nipples so hard
244
00:12:36,254 --> 00:12:38,655
that they pop off
like bottle caps!
245
00:12:42,393 --> 00:12:44,677
Y- yeah-yeah,
he works here.
246
00:12:44,745 --> 00:12:46,625
There you go. You wanna
drag in other witnesses,
247
00:12:46,664 --> 00:12:47,931
or do you believe me now?
248
00:12:47,999 --> 00:12:50,033
No, I believe you.
I'm sorry, but...
249
00:12:50,101 --> 00:12:51,801
Why couldn't you just
tell me this before?
250
00:12:51,869 --> 00:12:52,986
I like to keep things hot.
251
00:12:53,053 --> 00:12:54,538
That's how I play it if
you gonna ride with me,
252
00:12:54,605 --> 00:12:55,605
you know what I'm sayin'?
253
00:12:55,606 --> 00:12:56,740
All right, all right.
Yes.
254
00:12:56,808 --> 00:12:58,408
All right. I gotta
go to orientation now.
255
00:12:58,433 --> 00:13:00,600
- All right.
- All right? All right.
256
00:13:06,333 --> 00:13:09,919
I can't believe we didn't
think of carpooling before.
257
00:13:09,987 --> 00:13:11,627
I mean, IPS is right
on my way to work,
258
00:13:11,655 --> 00:13:14,724
and then I just pick
you up on my way home.
259
00:13:15,593 --> 00:13:18,011
Yeah.
260
00:13:18,079 --> 00:13:20,147
And it gives us another
half-hour together,
261
00:13:20,214 --> 00:13:24,968
just you, me, and imus.
262
00:13:25,036 --> 00:13:26,636
Where do I turn, baby?
263
00:13:26,704 --> 00:13:28,605
Uh, I, um...
264
00:13:28,673 --> 00:13:30,957
You don't know?
You been goin' there every day.
265
00:13:31,025 --> 00:13:33,225
But I don't have my bearings
when I'm not driving, OK?
266
00:13:33,250 --> 00:13:34,711
I mean, your left
is my right, and--
267
00:13:34,779 --> 00:13:36,312
Oh, we're here.
268
00:14:06,611 --> 00:14:08,812
Hey, how's it goin'?
269
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:10,948
Hey...
270
00:14:11,015 --> 00:14:12,449
Aren't you the guy
who wore my shirt
271
00:14:12,516 --> 00:14:15,652
and gave me those
expired coupons?
272
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,520
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, listen,
273
00:14:17,588 --> 00:14:19,990
is there a multiplex around
here or a batting cage?
274
00:14:20,058 --> 00:14:22,492
'Cause I gotta kill
about 8 hours.
275
00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:24,193
What's your story, man?
276
00:14:24,261 --> 00:14:26,947
I started dating this new girl.
Carrie. You met her.
277
00:14:27,014 --> 00:14:28,532
Oh, the scary chick,
lots of mascara?
278
00:14:28,599 --> 00:14:30,300
Yeah.
She's great, she's great.
279
00:14:30,368 --> 00:14:32,502
Anyway, I told her I had a job
so she'd sleep with me,
280
00:14:32,570 --> 00:14:33,936
so I've been pretending
to go to work every day,
281
00:14:34,004 --> 00:14:35,924
but suddenly she wants
to carpool, so it's, like,
282
00:14:35,949 --> 00:14:37,840
I actually have to
come here now, you know?
283
00:14:37,908 --> 00:14:40,543
Sounds like you kids
are gonna make it.
284
00:14:40,611 --> 00:14:42,291
And toss me that box
over there, would you?
285
00:14:42,316 --> 00:14:44,865
Oh, yeah, sure.
No problem.
286
00:14:44,932 --> 00:14:45,932
This girlfriend of yours,
287
00:14:45,950 --> 00:14:47,630
isn't she wondering
why you don't get paid?
288
00:14:47,655 --> 00:14:49,218
Oh, she thinks I do.
289
00:14:49,286 --> 00:14:51,446
I actually borrowed a few
thousand dollars from my mom,
290
00:14:51,471 --> 00:14:54,824
told her Carrie needed
a kidney transplant.
291
00:14:54,892 --> 00:14:56,332
It's actually
a pretty good lie, too,
292
00:14:56,357 --> 00:14:58,291
'cause she pees a lot,
you know?
293
00:15:00,064 --> 00:15:02,182
Hey, you know what,
I never got your name.
294
00:15:02,250 --> 00:15:03,817
Uh, Deacon.
Deacon Palmer.
295
00:15:03,885 --> 00:15:06,302
Oh. Doug Heffernan.
296
00:15:06,370 --> 00:15:09,873
It's funny, I've never had
a black friend before.
297
00:15:09,941 --> 00:15:12,826
You don't have one now.
298
00:15:12,893 --> 00:15:14,661
- Palmer.
- Uh, yes, sir?
299
00:15:14,728 --> 00:15:16,721
That, uh, Mr. David's
Boutique on Hillside,
300
00:15:16,756 --> 00:15:18,715
they never got
their shipment yesterday.
301
00:15:18,783 --> 00:15:20,083
Now him and his life partner
302
00:15:20,151 --> 00:15:21,952
are threatening
to scratch my eyes out.
303
00:15:22,019 --> 00:15:23,336
Right. Well, see,
what happened,
304
00:15:23,404 --> 00:15:25,084
I was gonna make the
delivery, and I-I got--
305
00:15:25,122 --> 00:15:27,507
That was, uh, my,
uh, screwup, sir.
306
00:15:27,575 --> 00:15:29,442
Yours?
Who are you?
307
00:15:29,510 --> 00:15:33,229
I'm-I'm Doug Heffernan.
I'm, uh, the new driver.
308
00:15:33,297 --> 00:15:35,599
Oh, yeah.
Right, right.
309
00:15:35,666 --> 00:15:36,999
Yeah, uh, I--
310
00:15:37,067 --> 00:15:39,427
I told Deacon I would make
those deliveries, but then I, uh--
311
00:15:39,452 --> 00:15:41,454
I got a phone call
from the hospital.
312
00:15:41,522 --> 00:15:45,558
My uncle needed
a kidney transplant.
313
00:15:45,626 --> 00:15:47,360
Well, where's your uniform?
314
00:15:47,428 --> 00:15:50,179
I- I gave it to my uncle.
315
00:15:50,248 --> 00:15:52,549
Gift shop was closed.
316
00:15:52,617 --> 00:15:54,334
Well, get another one.
317
00:15:54,402 --> 00:15:55,602
And make that delivery, Palmer.
318
00:15:55,627 --> 00:15:56,827
Yes, sir.
319
00:15:58,573 --> 00:16:00,774
Thanks a lot, man.
That was-that was nice.
320
00:16:00,842 --> 00:16:02,208
No problem.
321
00:16:02,276 --> 00:16:03,793
You, uh--
322
00:16:03,861 --> 00:16:06,596
You really like to work that
kidney transplant thing, don't you?
323
00:16:06,664 --> 00:16:09,633
It's your Cadillac
of personal emergencies.
324
00:16:19,193 --> 00:16:20,827
Hey, you're reading now.
325
00:16:20,895 --> 00:16:22,829
What happened
to the silly putty?
326
00:16:22,897 --> 00:16:24,931
Eh, lookin' for a job.
327
00:16:24,999 --> 00:16:26,132
Oh, yeah?
328
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:27,400
Yeah, just something temporary
329
00:16:27,425 --> 00:16:30,593
till I get the financing
lined up for my brewery.
330
00:16:31,755 --> 00:16:34,724
Let me throw something crazy
out there at ya, brother.
331
00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,592
Instead of just hanging
around here every day,
332
00:16:36,594 --> 00:16:38,362
why don't you
actually work here?
333
00:16:38,429 --> 00:16:40,130
Mmm. You know what it is?
334
00:16:40,198 --> 00:16:43,666
I'm a creative bird.
I need to flap my wings.
335
00:16:51,242 --> 00:16:52,442
Hey!
336
00:16:52,509 --> 00:16:54,477
Carrie.
What are you doing here?
337
00:16:54,545 --> 00:16:57,280
Special delivery of hot lovin'.
338
00:16:58,782 --> 00:17:01,067
- That means kiss me.
- Oh. OK.
339
00:17:01,135 --> 00:17:03,469
Uh, aren't you missing work?
340
00:17:03,537 --> 00:17:05,489
Nah. They're doin' some
stupid C.P.R. training.
341
00:17:05,556 --> 00:17:06,723
Yawn.
342
00:17:06,790 --> 00:17:08,892
Anyway, I wanted
to surprise my man
343
00:17:08,959 --> 00:17:11,628
with a little Carrie
and a little Debbie.
344
00:17:11,695 --> 00:17:14,095
That's great. Well, thank you
so much. I gotta get goin', OK?
345
00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:15,014
Hey, Heffernan, uh,
346
00:17:15,082 --> 00:17:16,833
there's 2 pallets
on a forklift
347
00:17:16,868 --> 00:17:19,085
that should've been
loaded an hour ago, huh?
348
00:17:21,972 --> 00:17:23,740
So get on it.
349
00:17:23,808 --> 00:17:28,194
Does that mean I get to
see you work the forklift?
350
00:17:30,264 --> 00:17:31,197
I think it does.
351
00:17:31,265 --> 00:17:34,000
Yay!
352
00:17:42,393 --> 00:17:44,076
You might wanna stand back.
353
00:17:44,144 --> 00:17:45,712
- Right, right.
- Ahem.
354
00:18:01,345 --> 00:18:04,047
This one, she's, uh--
She's, uh, finicky.
355
00:18:04,115 --> 00:18:05,915
You gotta go back
before you get her goin'.
356
00:18:05,983 --> 00:18:07,701
Everybody complains about it.
357
00:18:22,650 --> 00:18:24,010
We had to open that
and look at it.
358
00:18:24,035 --> 00:18:26,185
You gotta check out
the contents sometimes.
359
00:18:26,253 --> 00:18:28,237
This happens.
360
00:19:04,325 --> 00:19:07,060
In my office, now!
361
00:19:13,367 --> 00:19:15,167
Wonder what this is about.
362
00:19:17,071 --> 00:19:20,407
I got about 250
smashed-up boxes out there.
363
00:19:20,474 --> 00:19:22,141
What the hell happened?
364
00:19:22,209 --> 00:19:23,505
I'm not really sure, sir.
365
00:19:23,530 --> 00:19:26,069
See, I'm still pretty
broken up about my uncle.
366
00:19:26,113 --> 00:19:28,047
The kidney's not taking.
367
00:19:28,115 --> 00:19:31,201
Well, first you mess up the
dress delivery, and now this.
368
00:19:31,269 --> 00:19:33,503
I'm sorry.
I gotta let you go, Heffernan.
369
00:19:33,571 --> 00:19:35,314
- Sir, you can't do that.
- Oh, yes, I can.
370
00:19:35,349 --> 00:19:37,057
You can't, sir.
I don't work here.
371
00:19:37,124 --> 00:19:38,216
What are you talking about?
372
00:19:38,251 --> 00:19:39,451
You were at the company picnic.
373
00:19:39,476 --> 00:19:42,379
We won the 3-legged race
together.
374
00:19:42,446 --> 00:19:44,848
I don't work here.
I lied to my girlfriend.
375
00:19:44,916 --> 00:19:46,236
I told her this
is where I worked,
376
00:19:46,250 --> 00:19:47,450
so for the last couple months,
377
00:19:47,475 --> 00:19:49,115
I've just been showing
up and hanging out.
378
00:19:50,104 --> 00:19:52,305
Oh, for crying out loud.
379
00:19:53,641 --> 00:19:55,681
Look, but if she--
If she knows I been lying to her,
380
00:19:55,706 --> 00:19:57,176
she's gonna kill me, so I--
381
00:19:57,244 --> 00:20:01,347
I guess what I'm saying is I--
I'd like to apply for a job.
382
00:20:02,850 --> 00:20:07,470
You understand, you're not
asking at the best time?
383
00:20:07,538 --> 00:20:09,778
I do understand that, sir,
but let me tell you something,
384
00:20:09,846 --> 00:20:11,606
if you give me another chance,
I'll show you,
385
00:20:11,631 --> 00:20:13,359
I'm the best damn driver
you've ever seen.
386
00:20:13,427 --> 00:20:14,760
Well...
387
00:20:14,828 --> 00:20:16,762
I'm gonna be totally fried
if corporate finds out
388
00:20:16,830 --> 00:20:19,232
I let a civilian
operate a forklift.
389
00:20:19,300 --> 00:20:21,167
And we are defending
3-legged champs.
390
00:20:21,235 --> 00:20:22,668
True.
391
00:20:24,204 --> 00:20:26,356
So, what do you say?
Can I have a job?
392
00:20:26,424 --> 00:20:28,925
Well--
393
00:20:28,993 --> 00:20:32,695
Well, since I fired you,
I guess there's a slot open.
394
00:20:34,014 --> 00:20:37,883
- All right, you start on Monday.
- All right, thanks, sir.
395
00:20:46,293 --> 00:20:47,660
Wanna see my truck?
396
00:20:47,728 --> 00:20:48,728
Yeah.
397
00:20:58,889 --> 00:21:03,159
Coming up,
an all-new Melrose Place.
398
00:21:04,895 --> 00:21:07,230
I'm either taking a bath
or watching Melrose,
399
00:21:07,298 --> 00:21:10,066
or both!
Leave a message.
400
00:21:10,301 --> 00:21:12,181
Hey, man, it's Doug.
Just wanted to let you know
401
00:21:12,202 --> 00:21:14,737
you left your jacket
at my house, and, uh,
402
00:21:14,805 --> 00:21:16,472
oh, yeah, Kimberly isn't dead.
403
00:21:16,540 --> 00:21:18,942
She's alive!
She's alive!
29614
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