Original subtitles

- Hey guys, I'm Tasha.

This video is going to be I guess

in the hope of educating people.

And on behalf of those who are

unable to speak up for themselves.

I've been doing some crying today,

it's been rough emotionally, and it's

actually not the parasites this time, it is the...

The opinions of other people.

I know that my worth comes from God and

it shouldn't matter what other people think,

but the truth is I am human and as a

human it does hurt when what people

say can really get to us as a human.

So this video is about having a disease

that is called a delusional disease,

doctors think it's a delusional disease.

It does make me feel crazy and it

makes me feel stupid, you know?

But it's real.

- Tonight we're going to focus on a controversial

and mysterious condition known as Morgellons.

Its sufferers complain of stinging and

crawling sensations under the skin

and say their bodies sometimes grow

strange string-like fibers on the surface.

There are thousands who say they

suffer from its bizarre symptoms,

bu there are many in the worlds of science and

medicine who believe that it's all in the mind.

- I don't even really like to call it a disease

because I don't think we've quite figured out what it is.

An illness that a whole lot of people are suffering from.

An illness they're not getting any answers to.

Not from the CDC, not from doctors.

- [News Anchor] Randy Wymore started out

as a skeptic too, but years ago after

taking a closer look at the fibers, he changed

his mind and he says other doctors

might also if only they would look.

- I'd like the world to know that when

you're a Morgellons patient, you are treated

worse than you would treat your family pet.

When you're rejected like that,

you don't feel like living anymore,

you feel like you don't have any hope.

Please help the people that have Morgellons.

[dramatic atmosphere music]

[laughs]

- [Carrie] Hey everybody.

I've been taking micro shots of it with

my microscope, my digital microscope.

I only paid 20 bucks for it on Ebay,

so the pictures are real low quality,

but it will show you some stuff,

so I'm gonna go through the slideshow

and talk to you as I go through

and point out some different things.

See the symptoms of Morgellons in here?

There's the 30th of April, this was

the next day after the scab comes off.

That's on the 1st.

There's a better picture of what I'm talking about

and it brings things to the surface, look at the Morgellons.

I miss my $300 microscope, but those

were adequate, I think they showed.

- Hey guys, I'm Tasha and it's been an exciting morning.

Really crazy morning actually with some

discovery, so thought I'd better fill you in.

So it started, well I can't say it started,

but it just came to light because of

the video that I posted, the two videos

that I posted yesterday about the worms

coming out of my face, and so people

did not believe that they were worms,

so I was like you know what, you've gotta

see what came out of my wrist.

Now I have pictures of all this.

I posted them last night actually and

it's on my blog, so if you go to

TashaLee.org/MCS it's one of the

top two posts, most recent posts,

I believe it's called Worm Pics Part Two.

It was like the pussy organism type thing

that came out, but there was this black wire

in there, I'm like why is there a wire,

what the heck is that wire doing, it looks

like it's coming out from there

and going elsewhere on my arm.

Okay, so after people not believing that

they were worms and then I was like I'm

gonna dig out those pictures, I posted them,

so it had me looking through them again

and thinking about facial worms, and so

I was doing a search online and I came

across a video about Morgellons Disease

and I'm like oh yeah, I remember people

saying that that means parasites

coming out of your skin and, I don't know,

for some reason I just felt I had to

watch it today, I hadn't really wanted

to look into Morgellons Disease 'cause I'm

like I know I have parasites anyway and

I'm doing stuff to treat the parasites,

so I don't really feel the need

for another diagnosis, but today I

felt drawn to watch the video, so I did,

and let me tell you, it was freaky!

Because I looked on the video and

I'm like that thing, that organism,

that is exactly what I just posted pictures of.

It's got the black wire.

It looked, I mean it's just exactly like it.

So the people describing their symptoms

on there, I'm like I have those, oh my gosh!

So I guess I have Morgellons Disease too.

If you're interested at all in this, you know

that the symptoms that people describe with

Morgellons is feeling crawling things,

biting, itching, and colored threads

coming out of their skin, and if it

sounds like something you got, do your

own research, look into a little bit.

All right, well if you like this video

please give it a thumbs up and

I will see you next time, bye.

- I've rubbed crushed asprin into my skin,

and you can see the Morgellons is in my cheek there.

That's what's made it really puffy.

It's all around my lips.

It's in my chin.

It's really bad there.

It's actually getting better with this asprin.

And in the nose, it's hard to put it on, makeup kinda

falls off, but you have to just press it in.

I just had a bath.

I put some [mumbles] on my skin.

My eyes are a really dark, I don't know what

that's from, something to do with Morgellons.

Dark dark dark under there, I don't know.

I don't know why I'm like that, but I think it

looks worse in this lighting than it actually is.

I don't know what that's from, but not a good sign.

The lips are really bad.

Put it on your lips too.

Got a horrible coating on your lips.

So anyhow folks, there's my latest video.

Regarding Morgellons symptoms,

I opened a Facebook support group.

I'd like you to join.

That'd be great.

Anyhow, thank you for watching this update of my

silent superbug fiber disease Morgellons symptoms.

Thank you for watching.

- I'm having a whole lot of thoughts,

so I just keep getting the message,

turn the camera on and talk, and the one

thought that keeps coming up to mind

for me right in this moment is

mfromcanada1, over and over she is in my mind.

I just want to somehow...

Say hi.

Your videos make me cry because you are

getting on there and you are showing it

like you see it and risking looking crazy.

I'm not trying to say I think

anything, 'cause why risk it, you know?

There are a lot of us on YouTube who do.

And I wanna tell you if you're watching

and you're thinking about, I'd just love

to get my face on there and just

saying how I feel and show my piece of the

puzzle, YouTube is a sweet, sweet family, guys.

Morgellons videos are boring because it's very slow.

It's so slow you can't capture it and

it's so fast you can't capture it.

[mumbles].

Did I say that?

Time to shut the camera off huh?

- [Heather] Stacy Hillman and her husband

Jeff say 2011 was the year from Hell.

- [Stacy] I was suicidal.

- [Heather] Last March Stacy started

feeling pin pricks on her skin.

A few weeks later lesions covered her entire body.

- It felt like there was some type of bug,

thousands of bugs crawling all over my face.

- [Heather] They spent thousands of dollars

going from doctor to doctor trying to get help.

- They basically would look at her like she was crazy.

- [Heather] Stacy shares that skin crawling

sensation with thousands of people all over the country.

Its common name is Morgellon Syndrome, which the

CDC doesn't recognize as legit.

After months, the Hillmans finally found

relief in Dr. Omar Amin in Scottsdale.

He's a parasitologist, but since so many

sought his help thinking they were

infected by bugs, he wanted answers.

- [Omar] I'm a hardcore, old fashioned scientist.

- [Heather] Dr. Amin believes the problem

actually comes down to dental material that's

not compatible with the body's immune system.

The exposure to those toxins causes nerve

damage which makes it feel like the skin is crawling.

- The nerve cells would misfire.

You have no normal nerve impulse anymore,

and that misfiring will cause the

sensations of movement and [mumbles].

- [Reporter] The body's lymphatic system

tries to eliminate those toxins through the skin

which breaks out in sores and invites

other biological organisms to nest.

Like spores which grow long-stemmed fungus.

The concept is new to science and easy to dismiss,

but Dr. Amin warns thousands are at risk.

- Everybody who has dental work, and that's

just about everybody that lives in this

culture of ours, is an open game.

- He saved my life.

He really did.

- Dr. Amin calls the disorder NCS

for Neurocutaneous Syndrome, he sees patients

from all over the world, the Hillmans

came here from Los Angeles.

Now Stacy is taking some homeopathic remedies,

but her dentist has already started replacing

her fillings with more compatible material

based on her own individual blood tests.

If you'd like more information you can

head to our website at CBS5AZ.com.

Reporting live in Phoenix I'm Heather Moore, CBS 5 News.

- Hey guys, I'm Tasha.

I don't know if you can tell, but my face

is looking kinda strange this morning.

The last few days have been extremely

emotionally up and down, really difficult

things, but also really good things, so I

wanted to share with you about this

amazing stuff, and this little piece of magic.

On the first day that I realized I had

Morgellons, I was reading a lot that day

and one of the things that I read

was that this organism has, well it's a

crazy weird organism, but that pulsed

magnetism overloads the circuitry.

When I held it back there, I was like oh

my gosh, I'm just gonna cry, it was...

I felt it all over my body and it was...

I could feel my head actually was going.

And all these things in my eyes were

just going, like I cannot believe this.

It affects everything.

I'm like so if the Morgellons is in my brain

and is affecting function all over my body,

I don't know exactly, but that was some super crazy stuff.

It kept on like that and I just held it there

and I'm like I'm gonna kill you, Morgellons.

[laughs]

Eventually it kinda slowed down and I felt like...

A different person, I'm like something huge happened there.

Another thing that happened after using that

was I woke up in the morning, and I was

gonna go do the Epsom salt bath and I'm

like I have to go to the bathroom.

So I went and it was different, it felt

very different, so I looked, 'cause I

haven't been analyzing my BMs, I've

been burning out on that, and we don't have

a good toilet for it, but I did look that day

and there was definitely big pieces of rope worm.

I posted about it and a girl who says

she has both the rope worm and the Morgellons,

she believes it's the same organism.

I'm like that's kinda an interesting thought.

It seemed like whatever it was that was, I was shaking

up this area, but then my gut area happened too.

I think those were the big things I was

gonna say, this thing is a little miracle baby.

It's only $20!

This, and you can get the zapper for $35,

and how much does treatment cost?

I'm really really excited about this.

I hope this information has been giving you

hope, has given you hope, and some

information that can maybe help you too.

If you like it, please give it a

thumbs up and share it and thanks for

watching, see you next time, bye.

- Okay, I had a couple comments lately

that I have sadness in my eyes.

You guys can make all kinds of comments,

and I can let them slip on down the river

and I can build a bridge and get over it,

but that one kinda hit me because it's true,

I do have sadness in my eyes, it's been

really hard lately to even upload clips.

I'm sad because, and you can see it in my eyes.

I see it out there in the word, I see it

in my children, I see it in my grandchildren,

and that's not because I'm crazy.

It's because they keep going to the doctor,

they're complaining about something,

and something is affecting their health.

But they're not getting any help.

And I want us all to quit suffering

from disease that we don't know anything about.

Unidentified disease, that makes it like a UFO.

But if you see sadness in my eyes, it is, it's really there.

'Cause it's really serious, you guys.

A lot of people are looking at it and

a lot of people are finding dead ends.

But we need a healing that comes from truth.

Ourselves.

Yeah, sad eyes today.

It's okay.

I love you guys.

I really do.

- So I've just been using the magnetic

acupressure vibrator on my nose area.

Seems like some of the freckles have cleared out.

This one came out on the side.

I kinda tried to pull it.

Oh I got it that time.

That's what's left.

Isn't that interesting.

Huh, I've never seen it do that before.

I've just seen that what comes

out kinda looks like a worm shape.

Busted open, this one looks like he's still coming out.

All right, so I just tore him off.

Interesting.

- [Marcia] It was a Morgellons machine.

You will not believe this, it's got a

little particle on the end of it

and it is moving, look at that.

60 times magnification.

See if I can adjust it a little bit more here.

So it's coming from that little sample there.

Did you just see that movement?

Did you just see that movement?

What on Earth is this?

Look at this thing, oh my god.

It is strong, it is very flipping strong.

Oh my goodness.

Just weird energy around it, it's kinda

being picked up by the camera.

I don't know if that's anything important or not.

These are just a bunch of little pieces that

came out of a sample, this came from my arm.

What's all that weird stuff?

My goodness.

Well let's watch the fiber for a while.

See if it starts moving again.

Let's see if we talk to it.

Wow, where did that come from?

Did that just sprout out of there?

Excuse me, but did you see that?

It seemed to come out of there.

It popped out of there and grabbed on the other fiber.

What on Earth is going on?

That is so weird, that totally popped out,

I'm sure, you saw that didn't you?

Gosh, there's another one on a little piece of fiber.

Lots going on here, let's see.

It just detached itself from there,

oh my god, it is moving, oh my god.

It is so strange.

It looks like a plant, you know?

To me.

This is so, oh my god, I see it move, the little

one is lifting up the big one, oh my god!

Oh my god, the little one is under the big one

and it is actually, is it lifting it up?

Look at that, when it starts moving,

the power, the force, the energy.

Where does it get its food?

It is flipping strong.

Okay, flipping strong.

So are you gonna move anymore, are you gonna move some more?

A.

Oh my god, it moved me saying the letter A!

Did you see that?

Oh my god.

A.

Now it's not reacting to that.

Or is it, oh my god, now what?

Oh my god, look at it.

This is at 60 times magnification,

I'm using a Celestron amoeba microscope.

And this Morgellons sample came from my chin area.

So we got these little machines.

And I would really like to know

where they are getting their energy from,

I would really like to know that.

E!

That made it move too, the letter E.

[ethereal atmosphere music]

F.

F.

F.

O.

O.

U.

A.

E.

Wow.

E.

E.

My goodness.

I.

I.

I.

O.

O.

O.

U.

U.

U.

Y.

Y.

Oh man, did you just see that?

This is just insanity watching

this work, this machine at work.

It's working, it's jabbing into things,

it's connecting, it's now jabbing

into the other end of the little one,

it's connected to the other sample.

And all I had to do was say Y.

Y.

Y.

Why are you moving to the letter Y?

Why are you in my body?

Why?

Why?

Why why why!

I don't know if it's just the words or...

- Hey guys, I'm Tasha.

Today's video is about hair.

So I wanted to give you the best view of my hair.

Look at that.

I'm looking at it and thinking

it looks like a Pantene commercial!

[laughs]

But we all know that in the Pantene

commercials they actually put stuff on

there to make the hair look shiny.

I don't have anything on my hair and

it is so soft and shiny and gorgeous.

Okay, so what's up?

When I take a bath in Epsom salt,

guess what came out of my body?

You can't really see it, it just looks like a clump of hair.

This is probably 10, 10 to 15 fibers that came

out of not my head, but the bottom part of me.

This came out of somewhere.

The bottom part of me that was under the water,

I just kept seeing these things appear in the water.

And this is a clump of hair that came

out of me the same day right after that bath,

I took a shower and pulled this out of my head.

I mean if you look at them in the camera

you can't really see a difference.

Close up camera, they kinda look the same too.

They are fibers.

This area on my head has been losing hair for a while,

but I started to get these white and

silvery hairs growing right there.

And over here.

You can see some white ones.

I learned recently that what happens

with Morgellons is, gotta fix the hair.

[laughs]

Morgellons takes over the hair shaft.

It kicks out your normal hair and then

it starts to grow its fibers out of it.

And the fibers are more wirey.

Well when I started doing this parasite cleanse

I was like why is my hair so nasty.

Well I think because the Morgellons

was getting kicked out of my head.

And now those little wirey things are

gone from right here and it is very soft.

So isn't that interesting?

Parasite cleanse is doing wonders all over my body.

Now we're seeing it in the hair.

Very interesting.

All right, well thanks for watching.

If you like this video, please give it a thumbs up.

See you next time, bye.

- Hey everybody.

Another beautiful day in Colorado.

Hey check out this cup I was just noticing I was drinking.

Pikes Peak, tells the elevation right there.

They got these world famous donuts.

Can go up there and get them.

You don't even have to walk up there.

[laughs]

Walk up for 13 miles and then have a donut?

Okay, anyway, hey, got a little corner

over here and try and talk to you privately.

Okay, I'm gonna say some things and I'm

gonna say them like I know something,

but I don't really know anything, I'm just

gonna tell you my thoughts and put them on table.

You can shuffle it around and

throw them off if you want, okay?

Clifford Carnicom and Gwen Scott, I posted

those videos a couple days ago, are saying

that we all have Morgellons right?

And I believe that to be true because everything

I've looked at under the microscope that's in the...

Process of death, where they're shriveled up and dying,

they're full of Morgellons and it's taking over their body.

Morgellons is the death process.

And we do all have it, we're born

with it, we're born with death.

It's controlling, the death factor is

very controlling, the fear of death in

our culture, in our society, in our world.

It totally controls us.

And we, in response, wanting to find a

way to fix that and not die right?

I don't know, I'm not afraid of it anymore.

I don't even wanna say that, you know what I mean?

You don't wanna say it, I don't wanna be arrogant,

but it just doesn't scare me anymore.

I'm ready for that if that's the way it is.

God's will be done, you know?

But I am not, my nails aren't abnormally dying.

So that's a good sign.

Hey, thanks guys for letting me vlog for a minute.

I'm trying to spit out some stuff today.

- Hi everybody.

There's my Spooky2 setup.

I've been trying this technology to

help me with Morgellons symptoms.

I've been trying it for about a month now

and I wanna tell you a little bit more

about this and how it's actually helping me.

So let's just adjust the camera here.

So this technology is based upon Rife, R-I-F-E,

and you can look it up on Google, there's a lot of

information out there on Rife and his research

and to how frequencies can actually be used

to help cure people of diseases et cetera.

This setup here costs approximately $500 plus taxes.

I do think that this would be a very good

investment for just about anybody because

of the ability to diagnose and also

to help treat you for many things.

Even if it didn't work for Morgellons

it surely works for other things.

The one other thing that I love about it,

I absolutely love about this program,

is that you don't actually have

to be present for it to work and that

is the most amazing thing to me.

I used to try that ionic foot bath,

I hated having to sit in there for

so long with my feet in that bath.

Couldn't go anywhere, do anything.

I also tried the Hulda Clark zapper

where you hang onto those copper things

and you do 20 minutes and then you

take a break and then another 20 minutes.

I have no patience for those things, okay?

I much prefer the remote settings and I'm

using just fingernail clippings or toenail

clippings in there of my own for the DNA.

And you insert those into a magnet

and the magnet, the frequency generator

goes through the fingernail to either

diagnose or to treat, and because we are beings,

a small part of us is a whole part of us.

It's like, and I understand that inherently.

Okay, so what have the improvements been so far?

From me using this.

Well one of the main problems is my lips.

The coating has almost disappeared.

For over a decade I've had this plastic-like,

amber colored coating on my lips that

is like having glue on your lips and

you have to rip the glue off every day.

My lips have been nice now or pretty

nice like this for two weeks now.

I'm just amazed, okay?

Now the other thing is the skin on my face.

The skin on my face just feels so much nicer.

I can't tell you, it used to just

feel like it was covered in something

that was suffocating me literally.

Now it'll pick up other problems you might have

like perhaps you got an aneurysm going on,

or you might have cancer in your body

going on somewhere, it's gonna pick that up.

It appears that I have pneumonia.

I might even have tuberculosis.

Now I do think that's accurate because

I've been having this terrible cough for about

10 years now coughing up this jelly-like matter.

And one of the main reasons I haven't

been making YouTube videos as well is

because my voice, the symptoms get

so bad that I find it hard to speak.

Now today I seem to be able to speak

quite fine for over 10 minute, but with my

Morgellons symptoms it hasn't been that way.

I've been lucky if I can speak a minute

or two without having to stop and cough up.

So anyhow folks, thank you for watching

this video, I hope you appreciated

my update and I will give you more

updates on my trial of Spooky2 as I go along.

Thank you again for watching, I'll post links

below where you can get this, I'm not

trying to sell it, but I'm trying to help people.

I'll post links below where you can purchase

the Spooky2 and try it out for yourself.

Marcia signing out.

♪ Don't it always seem to go

- [Reporter] Joni Mitchell's music remains

as vibrant today as it was all those years ago,

but here physical health is another story

and now we're learning more about the

mystery that may be to blame for her

emergency hospitalization this week.

It's a bizarre ailment known as Morgellons Syndrome.

- This is the face of Morgellons Disease.

- The people you see here on YouTube

claim to be suffering from it.

Many experts believe Morgellons Syndrome is a

psychiatric disorder, including Dr. Charles Sophie.

Is there anything really there?

- Usually no.

I've had several cases of this over the last 20 years.

Some people feel there are bugs in their skull,

and we have had biopsies down to

the cranium and there's nothing there.

- [Reporter] Joni called Morgellons

"a slow, unpredictable killer.

"I have this weird, incurable disease

"that seems like it's from outer space,"

Joni Mitchell once said of her condition.

"Fibers in a variety of colors protrude out

"of my skin like mushrooms after a rainstorm.

"They cannot be forensically identified

"as animal, mineral, or vegetable."

What is she talking about?

What is she feeling?

- She's actually thinking and she's

actually feeling that this stuff is real.

- [Reporter] For Joni Mitchell, the mystery continues.

- Hi.

I wanted to talk to you for a minute about Morgellons.

Well welcome to all you new subscribers,

and if this is a conversation you're

not interested in, I won't be offended,

go click and watch another video because

I'm gonna talk about Morgellons, what we

call Morgellons and urine therapy.

Which I've had experiences now for

three years going on trying to fight,

trying to fight the battle with

this therapy, with this technique.

I wanted to get very honest with you about my

feelings and thoughts and experiences about it.

What I would like to say in all honesty

is I am still having a struggle.

And it's still a daily struggle.

So if you're thinking about urine therapy

for pretty much any other disease or

illness that I can think of, colds,

hangovers, rehydrating your body,

getting your blood pressure normal,

getting everything normal, yeah,

drink your pee, it is awesome, you can

cure just about anything that I can imagine.

I do it all day long every day.

I drink my pee when it comes out.

Sometimes I save it and drink it

other ways, I drink it through

my nose, I drink it in my eyes,

I drink it in my ears, and my skin

is the biggest one, you wanna really

do a lot of massage with urine, or you

can age it and it's more powerful.

More stinky, more powerful in a lot of ways.

But okay, so back to Morgellons.

Even though the evidence of it and the

affliction, the hell that is minimal

in comparison to the way it was

three years ago, very much so in fact,

but I can't say it's cured it, I can't say it's gone.

Like I said, if you're thinking you

wanna cure Morgellons, the reason that

Morgellons is coming are the, well I don't

wanna say anything, it's not like I can

say anything, but it's an expression of

what we've done through ourselves through life.

It's telling you it's time to clean the temple.

Yeah.

And you can for free.

Just get in there and, well you need a cup,

and you can have a cup pretty much made

out of anything, I wouldn't use styrofoam,

plastic, has to be like pottery or glass,

brass, gold, I mean who has a gold cup

laying around, but that kind of thing,

use that kind of cup and catch the

midstream, let a little go at the beginning,

save a little, let it go at the end.

Catch the middle.

Just do a couple drops in your orange juice in the morning.

A couple drops will treat the whole thing, just bless it.

You know, it's a different way of life.

Talk about red pill blue pill stuff, boy once

you start doing it you don't wanna

go back to that other way of life.

Because it feels really healthy and

it feels really good and it's very...

I can't promise you anything, but it's

a different kind of [mumbles].

I won't use those words.

Start using words and people get attached.

But can come unattached and just drink your pee.

[laughs]

Yeah, got lots of people really,

in this country, pee is called toxic

and pee is called gross and all

kinds of other ways, taking the Lord's

name in vain, but we won't get into that.

Hey, have a great day, I didn't mean to shed

bad news, but I just gotta be honest you know?

- I know that the people that I've seen talking

about Morgellons are usually anonymous.

I have multiple friends who have talked

to me about having Morgellons and thanked me

for speaking about it because they can't

talk about it because the people in

their life will think that they're crazy,

or they have brought it up and

people think that they're crazy.

I guess it came up for me today,

I mean it's come up multiple times

where I post pictures and people say

oh that's nothing, oh that's nothing.

I posted the video yesterday of the

Morgellons coming out of the side of

my nose and everybody who commented

said it looks like dead skin.

The thing with Morgellons is the stuff

that comes out of you can easily

be explained as something else.

The long fibers that come out of me look like hair.

The ones that grow in my head look like hair.

The little worms that have come out of my face,

people say they look like whiteheads coming out of my face.

Or the little one that looks like

the little piece, it looks like

dead skin, it looks like dry skin.

What can I say?

These things come out all over my body and...

If you're an outsider who just sees

one little snippet of it, it's easy

to think that that's what it is,

it's just dead skin or whatever.

But if you're in my body, and I am

closely observing everything about

what's going on, it's pretty exhausting,

it can be pretty exhausting 'cause you're

not only dealing with physical stuff,

but you're also dealing with this

relational stuff and it can be really hard

for people with these illnesses who don't have

any support, I mean I'm so grateful for Facebook.

There's groups online for all this stuff.

For people who are dealing with these things

where nobody in their real life gets them.

I guess I just wanna educate those of you who are

unfamiliar with invisible illnesses like Lyme

and mold, multiple chemical sensitivity, Morgellons.

So you know what we're going through,

I mean I know it can be hard because it's

like seriously you're making a big deal out of

nothing, but why would somebody make this up?

Why would you continue to talk about

something when people say oh you're crazy?

Why would you keep talking about it?

And subject yourself to more

people telling you you're crazy?

You wouldn't do that unless it's really happening.

Or unless you have a delusion I guess,

but the thing is there are so many

people with this, how can it be a delusion?

In conclusion, thank you so much for those of

you who have been so supportive throughout this

whole thing, it's really not easy to deal with.

There are some good days, there are some really tough days.

It's getting better though, I'm getting so much better.

I don't know what I would've done without

online support and without people who get me.

My friends, I have some really good Lyme Aid

friends who are getting me through this stuff.

And we tell each other that we're not crazy.

My friend today said she's gonna kick your butt.

[laughs]

If anyone gives me a hard time, she's gonna kick your butt.

Anyway, I mean it's just good to know that

you have people who've got your back because

we all need people, we all need human love.

Even if we're okay with none ourselves

and know that we're walking the right path,

it's just really really important

to have people in our lives who...

Who get us and understand and love us

and accept us and tell us we're not crazy.

All right, thanks for watching this video.

See you later, bye.

- Hi everybody.

In response to a Morgellons video of mine,

AscendingStarSeed wrote this.

"I really feel sorry for you, lady.

"Fear has taken total control of your life."

First of all, you do not feel sorry

for me at all, that's a bald-faced lie.

And fear has not taken control of my life.

I actually don't fear anything.

You don't know me one bit.

Because if you did know me, you'd know that I

was the bravest person you'll probably ever meet.

"The alt news community has failed so many

"people with constant fearmongering, hate, anger,

"and feelings of powerlessness over the boogeyman."

What has that got to do with my video?

Okay.

Nothing.

The boogeyman didn't create Morgellons.

It was created by people that make war,

it's a weapon of war, it's bioterror.

You need to wake up.

I've actually disclosed the cause of Morgellons.

I've actually disclosed the

coverup of Morgellons by the CDC.

I don't know what to say to people like you.

I don't know what to say to people like you.

There is nothing, absolutely nothing,

loving or kind whatsoever in your comment.

There's no empathy whatsoever.

You think you know everything and you know nothing.

I actually really hope that you get Morgellons, I do,

because it'll be a great learning lesson for you.

A great learning lesson, and you'll probably

learn somewhere in there to have some

compassion and empathy for people instead of

making hurtful, hateful comments like this one.

AscendingStarSeed, you're not welcome

on my page and you're getting blocked.

And I actually hope everybody goes over

to your channel and tells you what

they think of you for writing this sort

of comment because you're heartless and

I don't want heartless people in my world.

They don't belong.

- There are things that...

Oh my gosh, it's like...

Why turn on the recorder, why talk to you?

But when you're the only one that I can talk to...

And I get frozen and he's frozen, I mean paralyzed.

I would love love love to pass the system of diagnosis.

But I've been diagnosed with some pretty heavy stuff lately.

Psychotic Depression.

And I researched that and I looked it up just to see.

WTF.

[chuckles]

Is that, sounds pretty psychotic.

I don't feel psychotic.

But it's deep.

Sorry I have not been showing up.

It's because I don't wanna record

depressing videos like this.

You know what I'm saying?

I've been talking to this group I'm in, so that's good.

But...

I have a feeling the group I'm in

is for people who are on the edge

of suicide or have just been on

the edge and dove over, I'm not sure.

It's interesting, there are people that

I've grown to love in just one week.

Isn't that weird?

I'll hang in there for you guys, I will.

I wanna give you my word, I will not commit suicide.

I will look you in the eye right now

and tell you if for some reason I don't

show up, I wanna keep showing up consistent so

I'm not crying wolf, I'm not on that edge.

I don't think about ways and means to do that.

But I'm having a little trouble

living in this existence right now.

Why, I don't have a clue.

It's good to know that you're there.

But when you're in this state, it doesn't

matter if there's a million people there.

It's so weird.

What state am I in, I don't know.

I don't wanna turn the camera off because who

wants to watch somebody who's in this state, right?

I don't.

You don't.

It's real, I mean it's really

where I'm at, you guys, right now.

[chuckles]

You hear people say well you quit

drinking your pee, no, no that is not it.

It's not, I'm missing because, you know, whatever.

Thanks for watching, I mean I'm sure

this is getting a little too long.

All right, okay, it's time to turn

it off and I'm just checking in.

Thanks for your love and support.

I'll keep talking to you, I gotta keep talking

to you guys, I just have to keep talking to you.

Don't forget you have my word,

sorry I'm wiping my snot on my hand.

I just won't do it, okay?

And I hope you don't either.

Let's just hang in here together.

I love you guys.

- [Reporter] It's an emotional meeting.

These people from all over the country

all suffer from a baffling disease, including the

youngest patient, this little three year old.

- Everything about this is not

normal, it's gonna be really hard.

- I'm just scared.

Very scared.

- [Reporter] Using magnifying devices

they comb their bodies, examining what

they say are outbreaks of the disease.

- I've had 17 visits with doctors over the past three years.

All of them except one have basically laughed at me.

- I don't think these patients are crazy.

- [Reporter] At Oklahoma State University

in Tulsa, Dr. Ronda Casey believes

Morgellons is a genuine illness.

Dr. Casey says all her patients

exhibit the same types of lesions and scars.

She says they are definitely not self-inflicted.

- They all appear to be eruptions more

than scratched areas on their skin.

- [Reporter] Dr. Casey has taken numerous

fiber samples and says they're

unlike anything she's ever seen.

- They are not textile, they are not any known substance.

- [Reporter] Doctor Casey and her colleague

Dr. Randy Wymore take the samples to Tulsa's crime lab.

- Morgellons fibers are not any known textile.

Cotton or rayon or nylon, not any of those.

- [Reporter] What's more, the fibers

don't burn when exposed to high heat.

- Have you ever done a fiber that didn't vaporize

completely other than the Morgellons fiber?

- No.

- [Reporter] Many in the medical community

are nonetheless skeptical, but people

who say they have Morgellons are desperate.

- Look at the evidence, that's all we ask.

Look at the evidence.

- Hey guys, so it's kinda big day, big moment.

I have been losing my hair.

It started out down here, it's been

getting shorter and shorter and shorter

and shorter as the Morgellons come out.

The moving hairs, I think my whole head

is Morgellons affected, I think I'm

gonna be losing all of my hair, and I

can't really do much with it because

it's too short to do a ponytail or whatever.

I talked with a friend who has Morgellons

and he agreed with me that it would

be probably a good thing to go ahead and take

it off and then be done with it, and then

I will grow new hair, but this is all infected.

It's gonna happen.

A little nervous, so here we go.

Got my husband's thing, oh you should

know I have shaved my hair a few times

in the past, so it's not new to me, but I've

never done it while I've had a YouTube channel.

All at once here.

[razor buzzes]

No turning back.

Oh gosh, I'm scared.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh!

I might need a wig.

[laughs]

Oh my gosh, what am I doing?

Think I'll be wearing a hat to church this week.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh.

I should give myself a mohawk, I've never had one before.

So I cam maybe still hide it at this point.

[chuckles]

So there's me with a mohawk.

Oh golly.

I don't wanna be doing this, I wanna have long hair.

I can tell you what, I'm looking down at

these hairs all over my body going ha ha!

I beat you, Morgellons.

[laughs]

I'm throwing you in the trash can.

Looks like I have cancer right?

Well I do kinda, you know?

Got these tumors and lumps.

These parasites are causing which

grows into cancer, we probably all have

things that could grow into cancer in our bodies.

All right.

Better get some sunshine on that thing.

Oh wait, the sunshine is covered up by chemtrails.

[laughs]

All right.

Oh my goodness.

See ya!

- We are literally separating society

into two different segments, and those

two segments are like those that are

awake and those that are still asleep.

You can't be any other way.

So what is happening is you are

literally getting two different realities.

You have the reality of those that are awake

and you have the reality of those that are asleep.

I don't know how many of you have

watched videos by the Tool Tech Knowhow

by the name of Almine, but she describes

the Earth as separating like an egg.

You have the yolk, you have the white,

and then you know in the bible it

talks about the end times and how

the weed will be separated from the chaff.

So I think that's what's happening right now.

I don't even really feel like I am in this society anymore.

When I go downtown I look at all the people,

I hate to say it, but they look semi-retarded.

They do.

They're all drooling or they're, I don't know,

it really is starting to freak me out because

they literally look like they're

mentally disabled, all of them.

It's kinda scary, and so I don't

interact very much with anybody

out there because, first of all,

I don't even feel like I'm in this world anymore.

I literally feel sorta like I'm...

Becoming ethereal.

Becoming less connected, less solid,

less, yeah I have to say that.

I just don't feel like I'm any part of that world,

the ones who are asleep, at all anymore.

It doesn't bother me at all, but I wanna get to

the new place where all the awake people are.

So anyhow...

It's just how I feel, I hope people aren't insulted.

It's just enlightening.

Thanks for watching, mfromcanada1 [mumbles].

- Wow, wow guys, you know?

Some absolutely amazing things going on.

We're all just lighting up like

little lotus flowers everywhere.

10,000 subscribers.

What does that mean, all of a sudden, I mean just like that.

10,000 of us understand that original sin,

the one that Jesus died for, one sin,

one God, one meaning to our story as human beings.

We're not humans doing all that Tree of Knowledge garbage.

System goes so so deep, but 10,000 people,

and I'm not saying I'm one of them, I'm not.

But let's look and see what happens

because all kinds of things come clear

at about six months of gulping those

glasses all day long, all day long.

Six months is not that long guys, it's gonna pass.

It's gonna pass either way.

'Cause y'all are counting time.

I'm counting time too, I got 1,032 days.

I'm reading quite a bit of different

scripture about counting days.

Being blessed, when you wait and you

sit quiet and you don't expect anything and you

don't try and make things happens, you just.

[gibberish]

Like that, you know?

The nose knows.

10,000 subscribers.

Wow.

I was amazed, guys it's a lie.

It's a big fat lie and I'm not trying

to blame anybody because all of us have been

lied to, we lie to our kids, we lie to our kids' kids.

I did too.

For years.

Change their diapers and tell them

that's gross shit, to throw that away.

Pee is nontoxic guys, been drinking

it all for almost three years.

It's just wow.

And we're all putting pieces together.

Very, very rapidly.

Just hang on with your arms up and it's okay

'cause we're on the ride, we're in the river,

we're all flowing, it's all flowing as one.

One solid unit.

A very intelligent, very loving.

Very loving kindness from the God heart,

the bottom of God's heart, and who am I?

I'm not to say.

I can't say what's in God's heart, only you know.

Really, it's a you thing with God.

One and one make one.

We are all one.

Just one, there's no other number that's important.

Nope.

Just one, just you.

Just...

10,000 subscribers.

I love you, I love love love you.

And that matters absolutely none.

I'm just speaking for you.

I'll love you 'till you can love yourself like I love you.

[ominous atmosphere music]