Original subtitles

*

*

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

I decided quite suddenly to go abroad.

It seems a very rich but distant aunt has disappeared.

I decided to console myself on the Riviera,

until the matter is cleared up

and the insurance policy paid off.

Ketchup.

It's perfect for travel.

I find a bottle or two will make any dish

taste like home cooking.

I've already told him I have nothing to declare.

The upturned palm, the symbol of travel.

However, I'm afraid he wants the key to my trunk.

I think this would be the perfect moment for you

to look the other way.

Those of you who know of no other way to look

will have to endure the following.

*

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*

Ah, Benson.

Good morning, Hopkins.

Sir Charles.

Well, I...

hope you'll forgive me, Sir,

for having borrowed your scissors.

Oh, I was a great one for clipping the Times

in my own day, Benson.

Anything of special interest?

Oh, yes, Sir.

Oddly enough, a Benedictine friar,

a member of the Canons Regular in Cornwall, Sir,

has had the most remarkable success

with Cypripediums.

Uh, Cypripedium, Sir?

It's an orchid, more commonly known as Lady's Slipper

or the Moccasin flower.

Why, it's not a variety I favor especially,

but what this friar has accomplished,

under the most obstinate conditions--

With all due respect to the Canons Regular

in Cornwall, Benson,

I'm afraid we'll have to defer

the Lady's Slipper until another time.

-Yes, Sir. -Sit down, Benson.

Thank you, Sir.

I'm sure you'll recall a case

we had some months ago,

when a Lady Avon tried to sell some jewelry,

and, shall we say, overlooked the share

of the proceeds due to the Treasury.

I remember it very well, Sir.

I was on the case.

It escapes me now, but...

wasn't it a couple of rings she tried to sell?

Oh, no, Sir.

It was a rather dainty brooch,

lightly salted with diamonds,

to use the trade expression.

I remember she referred to it as a bauble,

because it fetched her no more than £5,000.

Oh, and what then?

Well, very little beyond that, Sir, except that...

Her Ladyship was a trifle abusive.

She disliked paying death duties.

She claimed it left her with hardly the price of a hat.

Of course, I'm not familiar with Her Ladyship's taste in hats.

But what does seem apparent is that she was widowed too early

to have acquired a proper sense of responsibility.

Yes, Sir.

Lord Avon was of my generation,

I knew him well.

At the time of his second marriage, he...

Well, as a horticulturist, Benson,

you'll understand better than I

the perils of a late autumnal bloom.

Yes, Sir.

The...

the reason I called you in

was to tell you that the famous Avon necklace,

20 perfectly matched Cabochon emeralds

with a cluster in the center,

the last major item of Her Ladyship's inheritance,

is up for sale.

I expected as much, Sir.

Death duties took the bulk of Lord Avon's estate,

and there simply wasn't the cash to meet them.

The proceeds of the sale of the country house

proved insufficient.

This left the jewelry.

For the purposes of probate,

the emeralds were valued at £100,000.

But what they'd fetch in the open market,

and especially abroad,

could be very much more.

The Treasury is having a new appraisal made.

I see, Sir.

Now...

Her Ladyship has already received an offer for

an undisclosed amount from an American source.

But the Treasury has very wisely

refused to grant her an export permit.

Has she received any bids in England, sir?

Several.

The most generous was an offer of £125,000,

which she turned down.

Now, this only serves to confirm my belief

that Her Ladyship intends to live abroad,

outside the sterling area,

and to dispose of the emeralds

in defiance of the Treasury claim.

This, of course, we're determined to prevent.

If I may ask, Sir, exactly where are the emeralds now?

Reputedly in her hotel here in London.

In the safe.

And while legally she is entitled to keep them

in a shoebox or a napkin, if she so desires,

I should like you to confirm their whereabouts.

Is that all, Sir?

Eh, no.

Lady Avon has booked a plane passage for the French Riviera

the day after tomorrow.

And, while we'll take every precaution to make sure

that the emeralds are not with her,

one never can be sure.

You'll be on the same plane, Benson,

and prepare to stay in France for a few days.

Yes, Sir.

Oh, I realize that this interferes

with your holiday plans.

Oh, that's all right, Sir.

Where were you going?

I had thought of Cornwall, Sir.

Ah, the Canons Regular and the Lady's Slipper.

Well, I had thought of looking in on the friar's experiments.

Well, I must say I admire your full devotion

for everything you do.

Tramping the countryside on every holiday,

sort of pollinating as you go.

I beg your pardon, Sir?

That's probably what makes you a good policeman.

Ah, tea.

Now, getting back to the case.

I think we must assume that Lady Avon

may have a confederate who might try and smuggle the emeralds

past the customs and deliver them to her in Cannes.

I see, Sir.

The important thing is that the emeralds

should not leave the country.

But if by any mischance they do,

you will have to bring them back,

with or without Lady Avon.

I understand.

-Oh, and Sir? -Yes, Benson?

Well, considering the attention that Lady Avon

and her jewels have received from the press,

don't you think we can expect

that half the thieves of England,

and some of the continent's sharpest talent,

will take this opportunity to try to nab them?

Point well taken, Inspector.

How many men do you want?

Oh, just a couple, Sir.

Oh, do you think that will be enough?

You know, there's always a grim possibility

that before this thing's over,

someone may have tried to slit

Her Ladyship's lovely throat.

*

Oh, good morning, Inspector Benson.

Hello, Ives.

Can I help you, Inspector?

Ives, let's eliminate the "Inspector"

just for now, hmm?

Oh, yes.

Ives, I understand you have Lady Avon's emeralds

in safe keeping.

I'd like to see them if you don't mind.

Uh, I'm afraid, sir, that's up to Mr. Saunders.

It is his responsibility.

I've already spoken to Mr. Saunders.

Oh, in that case, of course.

Won't you come in?

*

There it is, sir.

You know, this safe has been with us for 80 years.

Oh, how long have the emeralds been with you, Ives?

Only five days, sir.

You see, Mr. Saunders warned Her Ladyship

that we could not accept the responsibility.

But she insisted upon keeping them here.

(laughs)

There we are, sir.

*

Oh, excuse me, sir.

Can I help you?

I doubt it extremely.

Hulbert, Morgan and Lennit.

I'm here to appraise the Avon necklace for the Treasury.

I'm afraid your suspicions were misplaced, Inspector.

These are the Avon emeralds.

*

*

Mmm, delicious!

I don't know why everyone doesn't have caviar

for breakfast.

Don't you, dear?

Absolutely jammed with vitamins.

Would you care for anything else, milady?

Some more caviar, please.

Certainly, milady.

*

I do hope you're going to have enough money

to pay the hotel bill.

Oh, I expect so.

After all, after tomorrow I won't need any more pounds,

will I?

Tell me, Aunt Catherine,

how many seasons have you spent in Cannes?

Well, it's rather hard to remember, dear.

I shall have to work it out by husbands.

Let me see, the last one loathed the sunshine,

the one before that soaked it up like a fig.

Your Uncle Alfred, though,

of course, that was much, much earlier,

Alfred could take the sun or leave it alone.

Let me see, after him, there was Michael.

Oh, no, I wasn't married to him.

Well, all in all, dear,

I should say about a dozen.

Husbands or seasons, darling?

Oh, Gwendolyn!

I wonder if I shall like it there.

Well, it's a charming villa, dear,

and the agent says the servants are very good.

I shall know how true that is tomorrow.

But I promise you, if they are not perfect treasures,

I'll have them all changed before you come.

(indistinct chatter)

Really!

I'm a respectable, hard-working man,

and a teetotaler as well.

What's going on here?

What are you doing to poor Boles?

His name isn't Boles, milady, it's Fletcher.

And he's a convict on license.

Oh, it's you.

Persecution, milady.

I'm sure Mr. Saunders wouldn't employ any servant

without the very best of references.

Four convictions for robbery,

two for breaking and entering,

three for loitering with intent to commit a felony.

That's a lie!

It was only two!

Give him half a chance and he'd steal the gold leaf

off the cross of St. Paul's.

Milady, it does appear that I was unaware of certain facts.

Take him downstairs and search him, Hodges.

-Come on. -Milady, I wonder

if Mr. Saunders and I might have a few words with you?

Oh, very well.

Come in.

This is my aunt, Mrs. Sedley.

Darling, this is that detective inspector

that was so irksome about my brooch.

How do you do, madam?

I'm afraid it is I, milady,

who is going to be irksome now.

In the matter of your emeralds, milady--

What about them?

The management would so much prefer not to have

the responsibility of their safekeeping.

Would you not consider putting them in a bank vault?

I suppose this is your idea, Inspector.

I assure you, milady--

I will not put my emeralds in a bank vault.

But milady...

It's much more convenient for me to have them in the hotel.

An armed guard could always be supplied to escort them

from the bank when you wish to wear them, milady.

How do I know when I want to wear them?

No, no, it's absolutely absurd.

But, milady...

I have every confidence in the hotel safe,

and every confidence in you, Mr. Saunders.

*

*

Hodges searched the waiter, Sir, but he was clean.

A pity.

He looked a likely candidate.

One of those people must be a confederate.

The trouble is, Sir, there are too many

suspicious characters around.

Now, tell me, Benson,

what was Lady Avon's attitude?

How would you assess that?

Willful, perverse,

determined, extravagant.

Everything the Treasury is against.

Oh, she eats caviar for breakfast, Sir.

Does she now?

Prefer kippers myself.

Caviar is 30 shillings an ounce, Sir!

Well, we shall just have to take double precautions

to make certain that necklace doesn't leave the country.

You can put on another couple of men, if you like.

Yes, Sir.

(telephone rings)

Hello?

Who?

Oh, yes, put him through.

Yes, Mr. Saunders.

Yes, he's here.

What's that?

Hold on!

The Avon emeralds were stolen from the safe last night.

*

Lady Avon, if the Treasury appraiser hadn't come back

this morning to check on the size of one of the stones,

this robbery might not have been discovered for days.

-Obviously. -But the fact

that it has been discovered enables us to narrow down

the time during which the robbery

could have been committed.

Is that a good thing?

Lady Avon, where were you last night?

I went to a charity ball at the Dorchester

and I wore the necklace.

And I don't know why you're asking me all this,

because there was one of your men watching me

like a hawk all evening.

Lady Avon, you don't seem to be taking this loss very seriously.

What would you like me to do?

Scream?

I understand the emeralds were not insured.

Why was that?

Oh, I couldn't afford the premiums.

The death duties on my husband's estate

were absolutely crippling.

I'm sure they were.

Now, after the ball...

I got back at two a.m.

And I put the emeralds in the safe.

Ask him, he was there,

lurking behind the potted palm.

And afterwards?

You know very well.

I went straight to my room.

I saw you peeping out of the linen cupboard.

Lady Avon, did you leave your...

your suite again, last night?

I'm sure you had somebody watching me

to see that I didn't.

Anyway, my aunt, Mrs. Sedley,

was staying the night with me.

Why, I wonder if I might have a few words with Mrs. Sedley.

That might be a little difficult.

Indeed?

She left on a plane for Nice at 9:00.

That's in France, you know.

I'm well aware of that, Lady Avon.

May I ask if you intend to join her there?

(knock at the door)

Come in.

Oh, I'm sorry, Lady Avon, I...

Oh!

Oh, Mr. Geist.

Come in.

These gentlemen are just going.

Mr. Geist is going to show me a picture.

Lady Avon, I...

Oh, yes, you wanted to know if I was going to France, didn't you?

Well, I am.

And to save you the bother of finding out,

I'll even tell you the time of the plane.

Nine o'clock tomorrow.

Goodbye, Inspector.

Goodbye, Sergeant.

Bye.

*

Now, Mr. Geist, show me the picture.

*

*

Be careful with that, it's fragile.

Yes, madam.

Got her dog with her, sir.

That means she won't be back for quite a while.

Oh, why?

The dog would have to be quarantined for six months.

She wouldn't like that.

Pretty nice set-up, if you ask me.

Jewels officially reported stolen,

so she doesn't have to account for them.

Just turns up with them in France and sells them

to some rich American.

Well, she's not going to get away with it.

Do you think the French police will be able to help, sir?

Well, they're having her aunt, Mrs. Sedley,

watched in Cannes,

and they've arranged for an officer of the Sûreté

to meet me when we land in Nice.

I hope it won't come to that.

I don't...

I'm sorry, Lady Avon,

it will be necessary for you to be searched.

Oh, really, this is too much!

What about the dog?

Search the dog, too.

It's not a dog.

Her name is Juliet.

I take it she can come with me?

Please, the plane's gonna leave any minute now.

*

Would you mind unwrapping the painting, sir?

But, that's not necessary.

I'm sorry, sir.

Well, I'm an honest man.

I-I'm a member of the Society of Fine Art Dealers in London,

in Paris, in Amsterdam.

I'm an accredited dealer.

I have letters here.

Please, look at them.

I have never been insulted like this before.

I haven't even been accused of selling fakes.

I am highly reputable and well established.

*

Ah.

*

"Girl With a Milk Churn."

Lovely, isn't it?

*

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*

Inspector Benson?

Yes?

Commissaire-Adjoint Clement, Sûreté.

How do you do?

You had the report from London?

We had a report from Interpol in Paris.

The subject, Madame Sedley,

has been under surveillance

since she arrive.

The other subject was with you in this plane?

Oh, yes.

She's over there now, in the white hat.

Here.

(speaks French word)

(speaking French)

Quite.

Do you wish to have her searched?

She was searched quite thoroughly in London.

No result.

But she must have the jewels with her.

Ah, now watch!

Oh, Aunt Catherine.

Darling!

Oh, darling, you're not quite your immaculate self.

Have you had a ghastly trip?

If she does not have the stolen jewels,

what are we watching for?

I said we didn't find them on her,

but she's got them all right.

So chic, too.

Who did she steal them from?

From herself.

Ah!

To cheat the insurance.

No, they weren't insured.

Then what is the charge?

Defrauding the Treasury.

Comment?

Well, those emeralds were supposed to go towards

paying death duties.

You know, taxes.

Oh, she's leaving now.

Oh, um...

What is it?

Oh, glasses.

But, monsieur, you cannot do this.

What do you mean?

What are you talking about?

The lady does not pay government taxes.

This is not an offense for her to be extradited.

The report say the jewels were stolen.

Well, so they are.

From herself.

Monsieur, if we arrested everybody in France

who avoided to pay taxes,

there should not be anyone left.

But, monsieur, I mustn't lose sight of them for a moment.

The surveillance!

That, monsieur, is your affair.

Yours and the British government's.

I cannot waste my men for such a purpose.

But, monsieur...

I regret, monsieur.

It is impossible.

*

Ah, yes.

*

Taxi!

$230,000.

$231,000...

2, 3, 4, 5,

6, 7...

8, 9, 40,

41, 2, 3,

44, 45, 46,

47, 48, 49...

$250,000!

Oh, isn't that wonderful?

Oh, aren't they pretty?

Yeah.

Oh, wee!

(laughs)

And now the emeralds, Lady Avon.

Oh, yes.

Here they are.

Beautiful!

Just beautiful!

Beautiful.

I don't see how you can bear to part with them.

Well, if I'm going to catch that plane for Paris, I--

Oh, my aunt can drive you to the airport,

can't you, darling?

I should be delighted to.

Goodbye, Lady Avon.

Goodbye.

It's a pleasure to do business with you.

Goodbye, sir.

Oh, allow me.

*

Darling, I did everything just as you told me.

But was it absolutely necessary

to have that horrible woman search me?

She was so thorough.

*

You know, darling, I didn't get anything

to eat on the plane.

Is there any caviar in the house?

*

My difficulty with the customs official

turned out to be rather serious.

He found my aunt in the trunk.

Quite dead, of course.

But it was a peculiar place for her to be.

He was terribly upset.

You see, she had no passport,

and they're very strict, you know.

I'm very much afraid I shall have to change my plans

and continue without her.

But my trip is a short one.

I shall be back in a week.

Until then, au revoir.