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1
00:00:04,171 --> 00:00:07,507
The Simpsons.
2
00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:50,758
Hey, hey! Hey, hey!
Hey, hey! Hey, hey...
3
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:55,054
So hot. So sticky.
4
00:00:59,810 --> 00:01:00,852
Marge?
5
00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:02,437
I'm back here.
6
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:11,654
Ah, the old folks. It
happens every heat wave.
7
00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:14,198
Okay, people,
out of my freezer!
8
00:01:15,451 --> 00:01:17,285
But we're hot
and elderly!
9
00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:20,413
I'm sorry, these are reserved
for the recently deceased.
10
00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:23,708
Don't you go too far.
11
00:01:28,297 --> 00:01:31,257
This air conditioning is
better than any truant officer.
12
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,760
I'm seeing students
I haven't seen in years.
13
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:41,184
Mrs. K.
14
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,186
Oh, Arthur.
15
00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:57,784
We're wasting more energy
than Ricky Martin's girlfriend.
16
00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,035
Hey-oh!
17
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:15,718
Gentlemen, our city's sucking down
the juice like my wife at an open bar.
18
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:17,929
Mr. Burns, can your
plant handle it?
19
00:02:18,013 --> 00:02:19,013
No problem.
20
00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:21,224
We've siphoned off extra
power from the orphanage.
21
00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:23,893
Who are they going to
complain to? Their parents?
22
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,062
But, sir, we're
at full capacity.
23
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,606
One more appliance
could overload the system.
24
00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:31,609
Fear not. Our town
has dodged disaster,
25
00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,903
and I have come out
smelling like guest-room soap.
26
00:02:42,913 --> 00:02:45,039
You know what will
cool this place down?
27
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,583
A little touch
of winter.
28
00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:52,880
Dad, no! We're trying
to conserve energy.
29
00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:56,884
Lisa, if we start conserving,
the environmentalists win!
30
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:06,519
Jingle bell, jingle
bell, jingle bell...
31
00:03:10,941 --> 00:03:11,941
Jingle bell what?
32
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,276
Dad, it's a blackout.
33
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,069
A blackout?
34
00:03:15,153 --> 00:03:18,072
Oh. Every time Santa and I
get together, it's a disaster.
35
00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:22,285
Oh, no, the power's out? We'll
miss Fox's Celebrity Boxing!
36
00:03:22,369 --> 00:03:25,621
I heard tonight they have
Ed Bradley versus Mister Ed.
37
00:03:26,123 --> 00:03:28,833
It's terrible, all the
traffic lights are out.
38
00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:30,209
Driving sure
is dangerous.
39
00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:31,544
Yeah, tell me about it.
40
00:03:31,628 --> 00:03:34,213
I got some yuppie jerkoff
headed right for me,
41
00:03:34,298 --> 00:03:36,090
yakking away
on his cell phone.
42
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:39,510
I hear that. I got some big
shot barreling down on me.
43
00:03:39,595 --> 00:03:42,054
Hey! Who are you
talking to? Your boyfriend?
44
00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:45,099
Hey, jackass! Your
voice sounds familiar!
45
00:03:51,398 --> 00:03:53,608
I don't hear an alarm.
Let's take stuff.
46
00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:55,026
Whoa!
Isn't that stealing?
47
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,444
No, it's just looting.
48
00:03:56,528 --> 00:03:58,362
Sweet. Let's go nuts.
49
00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:01,157
Hot town, summer in the city.
50
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,076
Back of my neck
getting dirty and gritty.
51
00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:06,412
Mannequins.
You can't buy these!
52
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:08,915
Oh! Look at all
these tube socks!
53
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:11,125
But at night
it's a different world.
54
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:13,169
Go out and find a girl.
55
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,421
Come on, come on
and dance all night.
56
00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:17,381
Despite the heat
it'll be all right.
57
00:04:17,466 --> 00:04:19,467
And, babe,
don't you know it's a pity.
58
00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:22,595
That the days
can't be like the nights.
59
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:24,972
Oh, crap!
60
00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:41,656
Kent, this city has exploded
in a fireball of pent-up rage!
61
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:46,118
I think what the viewers want to
know, Arnie, is, is my house okay?
62
00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:49,205
You mean, is your
giant castle okay, Kent?
63
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,749
Don't hate me because I
bought at the right time, Arnie.
64
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,794
When's my right time, Kent?
When's my right time?
65
00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:04,011
Oh, no! They're
stealing the tire fire!
66
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:11,227
Finally, some repression.
67
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:16,899
All right, everyone!
Disperse immediately!
68
00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:19,443
We are prepared
to use force!
69
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,570
What, what? We're
not prepared, Eddie?
70
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:25,241
Someone call 911.
71
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,659
Oh, they never come.
72
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:31,038
Thus ends
the rule of law.
73
00:05:31,123 --> 00:05:34,417
Look at those looters
breaking windows, setting fires!
74
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,336
They're living my dream,
and you won't let me join them!
75
00:05:37,421 --> 00:05:39,463
Please, can I
throw one little...
76
00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:40,548
No.
77
00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:42,008
What if I just burn down a...
No.
78
00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:43,718
Can I at least
incite further... No.
79
00:05:43,802 --> 00:05:47,138
I've caused enough trouble already
by plugging in that Santa Claus.
80
00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:49,348
No more
irresponsible behavior.
81
00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:50,474
Can I have a beer?
82
00:05:50,559 --> 00:05:52,101
All right.
But not the imported.
83
00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:53,185
Homer?
84
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:54,854
You've got to
set limits, Marge.
85
00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:56,147
No beer!
86
00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:08,743
Get your T-shirts here! "I
survived the Springfield riot!"
87
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:13,205
Remember me as a hero.
88
00:06:16,043 --> 00:06:18,961
The looters stole
me glass eye!
89
00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:22,590
This be a superball.
90
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:28,095
Back in my day, we had
people who stood up to ruffians.
91
00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:29,847
We called them men.
92
00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:32,516
I agree with
the hideous crone!
93
00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:33,893
Yeah! Hear, hear!
94
00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:34,977
She's ugly!
95
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:39,315
I think I speak for myself, Comic Book
Guy and Bumblebee Man when I say,
96
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,900
I blame Chief
Clancy Wiggum!
97
00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:42,985
Yeah!
Yeah.
98
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:46,739
You know, it's not just my fault. You
were the ones doing all the looting.
99
00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:49,116
Oh, sure.
Blame the victims.
100
00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:51,035
Throw some Nikes
at his head.
101
00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:52,328
What size?
102
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:56,499
People, rest assured the police
department's ineptitude shall not stand.
103
00:06:56,708 --> 00:07:00,169
I am announcing the formation
of a blue-ribbon committee.
104
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,421
A committee?
105
00:07:02,506 --> 00:07:04,131
Did he say blue-ribbon?
106
00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:06,258
Committees don't get
any better than that.
107
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:07,676
Man, am I appeased.
108
00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,638
So, can we keep
the stuff we stole?
109
00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:12,264
I think that's implied.
110
00:07:15,060 --> 00:07:16,477
I don't care
what they say.
111
00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:20,022
I won't feel safe in this town
until we have better police.
112
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:24,151
Yeah. Wiggum couldn't catch
cooties at Milhouse's birthday party.
113
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:26,821
Dad...
114
00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:29,532
Oh! Seriously, everyone
says your parties rock.
115
00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:31,367
Homer, this is
all your fault.
116
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:33,577
If you hadn't plugged
in your dancing Santa,
117
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:35,287
none of this would
have happened.
118
00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,540
I admit it.
I did screw up.
119
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,960
But I won't feel guilty until I
can put a human face on this.
120
00:07:41,336 --> 00:07:42,503
Mom! Dad!
121
00:07:42,587 --> 00:07:45,005
Someone stole my
Malibu Stacy collection!
122
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:47,550
Marge, doesn't Lisa
have a human face?
123
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:49,552
Yes, and she's crying.
124
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:55,724
That's it! Nobody
messes with my little girl!
125
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,393
I'm going to find
those dolls!
126
00:07:58,436 --> 00:07:59,979
Are you gonna
call the police?
127
00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:01,647
Oh! Forget it!
128
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:07,069
They couldn't catch a cold
with a cold-catching thing.
129
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:10,030
See, when you don't
use Milhouse, it's hard.
130
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,032
I love this kid.
131
00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:17,329
Yes. Interesting. Okay.
132
00:08:17,414 --> 00:08:21,000
All right, I've come up with a
composite sketch of my prime suspect.
133
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,084
Behold!
134
00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:23,502
Dad, that's Bart.
135
00:08:23,587 --> 00:08:25,254
Exactly.
136
00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:29,508
Look at him over there,
eating that apple.
137
00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,969
What's he planning?
What?
138
00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,013
Maybe we should
look for clues.
139
00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:35,139
You're right.
140
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,101
What's this? A cap!
141
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:43,105
From The Wooly Bully.
142
00:08:46,318 --> 00:08:47,443
Do you sell hats?
Yeah.
143
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,196
To people? People with heads?
Maybe. Sometimes.
144
00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,406
Dude, I need a new cap.
145
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:57,453
Ah-ha! Did you steal
dolls from my daughter?
146
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:02,041
I think they demean women!
147
00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:05,502
Well, think again, son.
You're going to juvie.
148
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,671
But I just got
out of juvie.
149
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:10,132
Good! 'Cause
I need directions.
150
00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:17,640
Well, you'll be happy to
know Malibu Stacy's fine.
151
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:19,767
I really appreciate
what you did, Dad.
152
00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:24,897
You said you'd do something
and you followed through on it.
153
00:09:24,981 --> 00:09:27,900
Hey, you know,
stopping criminals is fun.
154
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,486
I felt like a big man
pushing that kid around!
155
00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,574
Yo, empty the
register, dude.
156
00:09:35,659 --> 00:09:37,201
Okay, okay,
you're the boss.
157
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:40,913
Silent alarm activated!
158
00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:42,581
Oh! That's it!
159
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,754
No cops in sight.
If I'm gonna save that clerk,
160
00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:51,507
I'm gonna have to take the
law into my own hands again.
161
00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:56,011
Cheese!
162
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,972
That's muy picante!
163
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:02,017
Homer, you are so brave.
164
00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:04,436
If anyone deserves to
take a penny, it is you.
165
00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:08,857
Well... Well, no.
166
00:10:10,193 --> 00:10:12,069
Come on, come on,
there's only one in there.
167
00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:14,697
You know,
I've had a lot of jobs.
168
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:19,159
Boxer, mascot, astronaut, imitation
Krusty, baby-proofer, trucker,
169
00:10:19,244 --> 00:10:22,955
hippie, plow driver, food critic,
conceptual artist, grease salesman, carny,
170
00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:26,250
mayor, grifter, bodyguard for the
mayor, country-western manager,
171
00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:29,670
garbage commissioner, mountain climber,
farmer, inventor, Smithers, Poochie,
172
00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:33,090
celebrity assistant, power plant
worker, fortune cookie writer, beer baron,
173
00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:35,175
Kwik-E-Mart clerk,
homophobe and missionary.
174
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:39,138
But protecting Springfield, that
gives me the best feeling of all.
175
00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:43,475
If you like protecting people,
you can make that your job.
176
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:46,186
You know, start
a security company.
177
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,775
Finally, a way to combine
my love of helping people
178
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,861
with my love of
hurting people!
179
00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:59,783
Fellas, I'm starting my own private
police force. Will you join me?
180
00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:02,036
Well, who would
my partner be?
181
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,203
How about Lenny?
182
00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:05,664
Him? No way!
183
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:08,375
You'll do as I say,
or I'll have your badges!
184
00:11:08,460 --> 00:11:10,711
Once I make and
give you your badges.
185
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:14,673
Flanders? I was able to
find your missing leaf-blower,
186
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,175
belt-sander and
morning newspapers.
187
00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:18,927
Well, nice work,
Inspector Find-It!
188
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,346
Did you catch the thief?
189
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:22,222
Who said
it was a he?
190
00:11:22,307 --> 00:11:23,349
Well, I sure didn't.
191
00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:25,142
Who said you did?
Nobody.
192
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:27,102
Wrong answer! Let's go!
193
00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,605
Okely-dokely.
You're pushing your luck, pal.
194
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:31,732
Here's my commercial!
195
00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:38,614
A monster!
196
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:43,077
Is this you?
If it is, don't dial 911.
197
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:49,375
Simply dial
636-555-3472.
198
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,837
Help me, SpringShield!
199
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:57,800
Have no fear,
SpringShield's present!
200
00:12:06,101 --> 00:12:08,394
Thank you, SpringShield!
201
00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:09,686
Friend?
202
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:13,982
The only friend you
need is SpringShield.
203
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:17,319
Monster put in wallet.
204
00:12:17,654 --> 00:12:20,906
That commercial
is very effective.
205
00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:23,909
You know, the old lady's
apartment was actually Lenny's.
206
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,370
We just used
a different duvet cover.
207
00:12:26,454 --> 00:12:28,205
Well, they're
both lovely.
208
00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:37,089
Hey, Officer Homer, how'd
you get so big and strong?
209
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:39,007
Green vegetables
and homework.
210
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,342
Oh, shucks!
211
00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:44,430
Hey-a, Officer Homer.
You look-a hungry.
212
00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:47,141
I shine-a you up
a nice big pizza.
213
00:12:48,643 --> 00:12:51,979
Wow! Look at Dad.
People really respect him.
214
00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:54,648
Hold your heads
up high, kids.
215
00:12:56,151 --> 00:12:58,360
I didn't know my chin
went that far up.
216
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:02,823
Oh, yeah,
that's the pride.
217
00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:06,785
Homie, to honor
Springfield's newest hero,
218
00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:08,662
I made you
your favorite dinner.
219
00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:11,206
All three courses
are dessert.
220
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,458
Even dessert?
221
00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:15,502
Dessert is three desserts.
222
00:13:15,879 --> 00:13:19,131
Mr. Mayor, you've been unflinching
in your support of Chief Wiggum.
223
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:22,134
Yes, I still believe in our
duly appointed police force.
224
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:27,014
Behind these doors are the finest
cops ever to wriggle into size-46 pants.
225
00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:28,098
Wiggum?
226
00:13:31,019 --> 00:13:34,104
Am I getting warmer?
227
00:13:34,189 --> 00:13:36,356
Clancy,
you're a disgrace!
228
00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:38,400
And in my blind rage,
229
00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:41,445
I hereby turn over all
this town's police duties
230
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:44,239
to Homer Simpson
and SpringShield!
231
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,700
Woo-hoo!
I'm Chief of Police!
232
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,076
Police? Uh-oh.
233
00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:57,753
Oh, wait. It was
better the other way.
234
00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:08,347
Now that I am the law, I'm gonna
make a lot of changes around here.
235
00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:12,768
First, I'm gonna cut overhead by
freeing Otis, the lovable town drunk.
236
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:19,274
You can let me go, but I'll just
keep exposing myself at the mall.
237
00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:21,318
What a character.
238
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:24,696
Cool! A lie detector!
239
00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:27,241
Lisa is a dork.
Lisa is a dork.
240
00:14:27,325 --> 00:14:28,867
Dad, make him stop!
241
00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:32,120
Well, according to this,
he's telling the truth.
242
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:40,379
Hurry up, boys.
243
00:14:40,463 --> 00:14:43,840
We've got to get these
toy poodles to the pet shop.
244
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:48,554
All right, Fat Tony!
Your little game is over.
245
00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:49,846
Hey, how'd you find us?
246
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,974
One of these ferrets
is wearing a wire.
247
00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:56,728
You're not a pet
and you're not a friend.
248
00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:59,565
You're nothing to me.
249
00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:02,776
With this latest arrest,
Springfield is now free of crime.
250
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:04,861
Although overrun
with ferrets.
251
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:08,365
Happy days, people.
Truly happy days.
252
00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:11,076
Daddy, how come
you're not at work?
253
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,244
I don't know.
254
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:13,787
How come you're
not at school?
255
00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:16,331
My teacher says
she's tired of trying.
256
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:19,710
Yeah, well, so am I,
Ralphie. So am I.
257
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:22,421
It's Bill and Marty
on the line right now
258
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:24,840
with Springfield's
very own Fat Tony.
259
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:27,342
I wish to announce
that my associates and I
260
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:29,011
will gun down
Homer Simpson
261
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:32,055
if he has not left
town by noon tomorrow.
262
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,601
Wow,
that's quite a threat!
263
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:37,269
Do you have
a song request?
264
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,854
Radar Love.
265
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:41,648
If that thug thinks
he can run me out of town...
266
00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:43,483
Oh, man, I love this song!
267
00:15:43,568 --> 00:15:46,111
I've been drivin' all night and
I've got sweat on the wheel.
268
00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:50,699
There's a voice in my head
that drives my heel.
269
00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:55,412
It's my baby callin'
on the telephone.
270
00:15:57,165 --> 00:15:59,541
I got some pizza and
I'm bringing it home.
271
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,172
You all know me.
272
00:16:05,256 --> 00:16:07,841
I've kept the streets safe
for you and your children.
273
00:16:07,925 --> 00:16:10,385
I've tricked or treated
at many of your houses.
274
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,471
Last year,
I was Jar Jar Binks.
275
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:14,723
Now, who will stand
and fight with me?
276
00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:18,602
I'm with you, Homer.
277
00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:20,145
Shut up, Flanders.
Anyone else?
278
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,730
What about you,
Dr. Hibbert?
279
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:25,859
Oh! Well, I'd love
to help you, Homer,
280
00:16:25,943 --> 00:16:28,278
but I have too
darn much to live for.
281
00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:30,155
I just discovered
Thai food.
282
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,824
I'd help you, but I have
yet to kiss a human girl.
283
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:37,579
And I've got a TiVo full of
unwatched Dharma and Gregs.
284
00:16:38,289 --> 00:16:39,331
Sorry, Homer.
285
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:42,125
I'm a coward now, like
all recovering alcoholics.
286
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:44,920
After everything I did,
you're going to abandon me?
287
00:16:47,256 --> 00:16:50,133
Homie, please, why
don't you just leave town?
288
00:16:50,218 --> 00:16:53,470
What? And let them come
after you and the kids?
289
00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:54,930
We could come with you.
290
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,891
In one car?
With no air conditioning?
291
00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:00,143
And the little poop machine
going every 20 minutes?
292
00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:09,861
I need you guys to help me!
Why'd you lock yourselves in?
293
00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:11,988
Hey, why does
anyone do anything?
294
00:17:12,073 --> 00:17:13,657
The point is,
what's done is done.
295
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:20,330
My Jersey muscle.
It's so good to see you.
296
00:17:20,415 --> 00:17:23,041
Did you have a nice flight,
Johnny Tightlips?
297
00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:24,334
I ain't sayin' nothin'.
298
00:17:24,419 --> 00:17:25,585
I understand.
299
00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:26,920
How is your mother?
300
00:17:27,004 --> 00:17:29,214
Who says I have a mother?
301
00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:31,967
Very well.
Let's do this thing.
302
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,890
You woke up this morning.
303
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:41,059
Got yourself a gun.
304
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:46,273
Mama always said
you'd be The Chosen One.
305
00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:49,025
She said,
"You're one in a million.
306
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,737
"You got to burn to shine."
307
00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:54,364
But you were born
under a bad sign.
308
00:17:54,449 --> 00:17:57,409
With a blue moon in your eyes.
309
00:17:57,493 --> 00:18:00,245
And you woke up this morning.
310
00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:03,165
And all that love had gone.
311
00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:07,794
Your papa never told you
about right and wrong.
312
00:18:07,879 --> 00:18:11,006
But you're looking good, baby
313
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,091
I believe you're feeling fine.
314
00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:14,259
Shame about it.
315
00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:18,263
Born under a bad sign With
a blue moon in your eyes.
316
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:19,473
So, sing it now.
317
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:21,600
Woke up this morning.
318
00:18:21,684 --> 00:18:23,143
You got a blue moon.
319
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,187
Got a blue moon in your eyes.
320
00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:28,732
Is your husband at home?
321
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:31,735
Fat Tony, how
can you do this?
322
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:34,571
Sorry, but this is the
business we've chosen.
323
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:39,075
But you're just perpetuating a
negative Italian-American stereotype.
324
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:42,204
I mean, you could
be a pizza man,
325
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:46,082
organ grinder,
leaning-tower maker,
326
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:49,294
and did I say
pizza man?
327
00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:52,672
You are listing
my broken dreams.
328
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:54,800
I don't get it.
329
00:18:54,884 --> 00:18:58,261
I finally did a job where I
wasn't lazy, stupid, or corrupt
330
00:18:58,346 --> 00:18:59,866
and now I'm going
to get killed for it.
331
00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:17,405
Any last words,
Simpson?
332
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:19,616
Yeah. You can kill me,
333
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:22,619
but someone will take my
place. And if you kill him,
334
00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:24,538
someone will
take his place.
335
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:27,207
And that's pretty
much the end of it.
336
00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:28,708
The town will be yours.
337
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,418
All right, let's do it!
338
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:31,628
Dibs on the crotch.
339
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,309
He's got backup!
340
00:19:46,394 --> 00:19:48,311
Somebody does care!
341
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,829
Johnny Tightlips,
can you see the shooter?
342
00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:53,692
I see a lot of things.
343
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:56,069
You know, you could be
a little more helpful.
344
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,909
Oh! Homie, I'm so
glad you're alive!
345
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:08,206
Yeah, but this town
doesn't deserve me.
346
00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:11,459
I'm giving this badge
to the next guy I see.
347
00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:14,963
That's funny. Because this is
how I got the job the first time.
348
00:20:16,132 --> 00:20:18,466
I'm so glad this
all worked out.
349
00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:20,844
Thanks for saving
my husband, Chief.
350
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:22,137
Hey, I didn't
shoot anybody.
351
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:24,097
They took my gun,
they took my badge.
352
00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:27,559
Hell, they would've taken my squad
car if I hadn't hid it under some hay.
353
00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:29,895
Well, then, who shot
all the gangsters?
354
00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:31,938
I must have
a guardian angel.
355
00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:33,315
With a rifle.
356
00:20:35,985 --> 00:20:39,237
Time to check in
on our little sweetie pie.
357
00:20:39,322 --> 00:20:41,907
Oh. She's taking a nap.
358
00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:47,203
Yeah, probably dreaming
about the time she shot Mr. Burns.
359
00:20:48,623 --> 00:20:50,332
She's just
like Clark Kent.
360
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,083
When there's
lots of excitement,
361
00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:55,837
she's nowhere to be found.
Nighty-night, sweetie.
362
00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:02,010
You woke up this morning.
363
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,638
Got yourself a gun.
364
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:52,811
ENGLISH - US - PSDH
27317
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