Original subtitles

(Cat) - Tonight

on "Acapulco H.E.A.T."... (gunshots)

(guns clicking, man grunting)

(tires screeching, automatic gunfire)

(men grunting)

(man screams)

(Tommy firing and shouting)

(woman) - ♪ Oh, can you feel it ♪

♪ Burning inside ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪

♪ Sweat dripping down my spine ♪

♪ Making it hazy ♪

♪ Wet fingers touching mine ♪

♪ Making me crazy ♪

♪ Out on the street I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪

♪ Deep in the darkest night ♪

♪ I feel the motion ♪

♪ Keep all my love alive ♪

♪ Come to the ocean ♪

♪ Out on the street ♪

♪ I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪ I feel, I feel, I feel the heat ♪

♪

(Tommy) - Beautiful!

Beautiful!

That was at least a 9.8...

with a chance for the gold medal.

- You always said I was a 10.

- I, uh... I lied.

- That's okay.

- Hey, take it where you can get it.

(guns clicking)

Wait, wait.

Wait, let me guess.

You want us to go with you two.

(both laughing)

(men grunting)

Let's reverse the roles, okay?

Now, you take us to where you wanted us to go.

(man grunting)

Think they understood?

Yeah, I think they understood.

(Tommy speaking Spanish)

(Cat) - Come on, let's go.

- I am Señor Zero.

Your employer.

- Senator?

Should we choose to accept.

- The amount you would think of

is now doubled.

An advance. - Look, we still haven't said yes

and we still don't know what the hell it is

you want us to do.

- My niece has been kidnapped.

You will find her and bring her safely back to me.

- Thanks for the ride down.

It's been a pleasure meeting you...

whoever you are.

- Won't you give me the courtesy

of listening to what I have to say?

- Look, what he meant in his abrupt way

is that he doesn't think this is something you need us for.

I mean, you're obviously a man with money and connections.

Have your muscle boys handle it.

Or call the cops.

- Thank you for the suggestions.

I myself would never have thought of them.

- Ouch.

- This search has to be private.

Very private.

(Zero sighs)

A hint of a scandal would destroy me.

No one knows what's happened.

Not even my bodyguards.

- Your niece wasn't really kidnapped, was she?

- Of course she was.

(Tommy) - Look, I'm sorry.

We have to pass.

If you like, when we get back to Puerto Vallarta,

I'll, uh, fax you the name of a discreet private investigator

who specializes in domestic cases,

but we're just... we're not interested.

(automatic gunfire)

Okay...

(tires squealing) Now we're interested.

♪

(Nicole) - This is his niece?

Kind of young for someone who just turned 18.

- Oh, it's an old picture of her.

He said she hated it because it...

well, she thought it made her look fat.

Anyway, it's the only picture he had

'cause the kidnappers took every other one in the house.

- Oh, that was clever.

No picture, no APB, or whatever they call it down in Ecuador.

- No ransom call either?

- The only leads so far

are the make and the color of the car.

The two men that took her were masked,

but one called the other one Ramon.

- That narrows it down.

- If we were looking in Stockholm.

Maybe. (Cat laughs)

- Well, that's all we have. - Yeah.

- Ramon and a white, old Thunderbird.

(Tommy sighs)

Well... highway south looks promising.

Cat and Nicole, you two head down there.

I'll, uh, I'll check out the airports, bus stations,

that kind of stuff.

Come on, it's pretty country down there.

It'll be like a vacation.

- Like this is a slum.

Anyway, Joanna's got plane tickets

and two rent-a-cars waiting

and if we strike out, we'll go to Plan B.

- Which is?

- I have no idea.

♪

(tires squeal)

- Gracias.

- Ooh, I hate rent-a-cars.

- Tommy liked his.

You should have switched with him.

- Well, that's because he's never ridden in it

where it's normal.

Anyway, this was a better color.

(Nicole) - Oh, I just love an air-conditioned car.

♪

♪

Hello?

Hello?

Anybody here?

(Nicole sighs)

- Is anybody here? - No.

- Hey... - What?

- Lookie here.

- I don't think this is the one.

- How do you know?

- Well, call me crazy, but aren't the wheels and tires

not sort of a given for rolling along?

- Buenos días, chiquitas.

My name is Theodore.

I speak three languages.

The best is English.

- Ah... - Did he call us chiquitas?

- Yes, and his name is Theodore. - Mm.

- You like this fine car?

I have the power to sell it to you.

- This is a great car.

How long it's been here?

- Not too long.

Maybe two, three years.

- Did you see two men and a woman driving this?

- A lot of people must have been driving it.

- Hmm... the engine's not rusty.

- Dry heat from the sun.

- The rest of the car's not rusty, either.

- It is well made.

- Hey, you've got something cold to drink?

- In a bottle?

- Yes, of course.

We are not savages.

- He sounded angry.

- Yeah, I feel it also.

(Nicole laughs)

(Cat) - What?

- The old man lies.

The car has been here for three days.

I know what to look for.

- You saw who was in it?

- Oh, yes.

Two men, one girl, woman.

I think she picked them up.

They went south through the jungle.

If you pay me five dollars, I can show you where.

American money, of course.

- You got five bucks?

- No, you? - No.

- Okay.

- Come on.

- I hope this is not a dumb move.

- Hey, we got lucky.

Besides, how can he be suspicious?

Just look at his face.

Hey, get out of the driver's seat.

(engine starts)

♪

- Hello.

There's a car headed for you.

Yes, my grandson is the guide.

Two pretty chiquitas.

♪

(Cat sighs)

(Nicole) - I am not going to say a thing.

- Ernesto.

I thought you said you knew the way.

- I do. - Then, um...

What are we doing on this cow path?

- Ernie...

Did we take the wrong road?

There is no shame in admitting a mistake.

- No, Miss Nicole, no mistake.

This is right.

From here we walk.

(Cat sighs)

- Boy, that's something you left out, kid.

(Nicole sighs)

- Come on, this way.

- I swear, I feel like we're being watched.

- Hopefully something with two legs.

(Nicole) - I hope it's no snake.

- Oh... there are no snakes in Ecuador.

- How would you know?

- There are big snakes in Ecuador.

- Well, thank you.

I love knowledge.

- Let's go.

- Come on.

♪

- No luck? - Nope.

I'm starting to get antsy about it too.

They should have checked in by now.

- Well, how many phones can there be

on the roads out of the city?

- See, the thing is, we don't know what we're up against.

And the most frustrating part about it?

We can't call the cops or anyone official.

- So can't we just hang around?

- All right.

We got two airports to cover, plus bus stations.

Hey, if we're not here, they'll leave a message, right?

- Correctamundo.

- Okay. - I think.

- "I think."

(birds chirping)

(both groaning)

(Cat) - Ernesto?

Where'd he disappear to?

- He was here a second ago.

- Hey! Ernesto!

- Ernie baby...

- Oh... don't tell me.

We fell for a ten-year-old kid's scam?

- Impossible.

With that face?

- I wonder where the hell we are.

- Let's not panic.

All we have to do is follow the trail back to the car.

- Yeah, I'm already feeling things

creeping and crawling around us.

- I wonder how long before dark.

(guns clicking)

- Maybe two or three hours.

- Perfect.

(Cat) - Listen, Rambo.

Whatever you think you're up to, you can forget it.

I'm an American citizen. - Mm-hmm.

- She's a French citizen. - Mm...

- Well, you must like one of those two countries.

- Congratulations.

But down here, ladies, I would keep that close to your chest.

Good job, good job.

- Listen, I don't know who you are,

and personally I don't care.

Do you care?

- Whatever works. - Whatever works.

Um...

We're looking for a young woman.

Somebody's niece.

So... why don't you just keep doing your thing

and, uh, we'll keep doing ours, okay?

So... we'll be going now.

- Hold it!

- Okay, who are you people?

- What would you like to call us?

- Godlike images of gentleness and kindness?

- That's very nice.

That's very sweet.

But we are just, um...

freedom fighters.

(men laughing)

♪

(animal snarls)

- (whispers) Jaguar...

(jaguar snarls)

(men grunt)

♪

(jaguar snarls)

(Nicole groans)

(both panting)

- They're not chasing us anymore.

- Maybe whatever it was is having them for lunch.

- Well, we better keep moving...

or we'll be dessert.

- Lord, show us our car.

Any car.

Even one with no air conditioning.

Thank you.

♪

(Tommy) - Geez...

Could they have been any more suspicious?

- I think it was your Spanish.

- Yeah, well, if the woman and the kidnappers

left the city by bus, it wasn't through there.

- I'm still spooked.

The cop with the Uzi kept checking us out.

- That's their job.

- I don't care.

All foreign cops look like,

"Ask me where the nearest phone is and you're toast."

- Come on, Dillinger, let's hit the airport.

(birds chirping)

- Are you sure this is where we left it?

(engine starting) - Well, aren't you?

(tires squealing)

The kid jacked it!

- So much for his angel face.

- Boy, you're never gonna let me forget that, are you?

- Eventually, yes.

It's just that today it's not all that.

- Wait till I get a hold of Tommy.

(imitating) - "Oh, this is gonna be sort like a vacation."

- He lied.

You know, I have a feeling that we should start walking.

(Cat sighs)

- Whoa!

(gun clicks)

- Señoritas...

Let's go.

Please, keep moving.

No trouble, please.

- Where did you come from?

- Just, uh...

What the hell are we mixed up in here?

- Please...

- We have a date.

- Apparently.

(engine stops)

- How does she handle?

- Not bad for a rental.

Steering is loose, probably the rods.

- You are a good boy.

You are learning your trade.

Someday... you will be as good as I am.

- Do you have to wait that long?

- If I don't kill you first. (laughs)

♪

(woman muttering)

- Hey, hey, uh, have you seen her?

- No, sorry. No.

- Passports, please.

- Yeah, well, what do you need to see 'em for?

I mean, what law are we breaking?

- Tell us what you're doing here.

- Well, not breaking any law, that's for sure.

- Indulge us, indulge our curiosity.

- That's what killed the cat, you know. (laughs)

(chuckling) - Joanna...

- I know that animal.

Satisfaction brought it back, no?

Satisfy us.

(man on radio) - Martinez, Customs. Over.

- I'll be there immediately.

Yankees, go home.

- Yankees.

What the hell is this all about?

- I'm sure you can guess.

We're all on watch for drug smugglers.

We don't want to be known

as the new pipeline for cocaine or heroin

or anything else that, that can harm or kill.

You fit the profile.

- Huh, yeah, right.

- You know, if you told us that from the beginning,

we could have saved you a lot of time.

- We're in Ecuador.

Time goes by here slowly.

Thank you for your cooperation.

- Sure...

(Joanna laughs)

- God... that outfit is so cool.

Hey...

- What?

Nah, nothing.

For a moment she looked familiar.

- Of course she does.

National Geographic specials!

(Joanna laughs)

- That must be her grandpa.

Probably heading for the burro.

- Yeah...

(engine starts)

What's wrong with that picture?

- Her burro has wheels.

- And air conditioning.

Maybe our little lady.

Let's go.

♪

(engine starts)

♪

- They're still behind us.

- God, shooting them in Puerto Vallarta

doesn't seem to have worked.

(tires squealing)

- Uh-oh. We're in trouble.

- You are gonna stop, aren't you?

(gunfire) - Hold on!

(tires squealing)

(Tommy laughs)

Whoo, how about that, huh?

- Wow...

(men continue firing)

What'd you think?

- Wow...

- What, that's it, only one wow?

- Wow, wow, wow.

- All right, yeah, deserves at least three!

(Tommy) - "Acapulco H.E.A.T"

will be right back.

♪

(birds chirping)

♪

(Ramon laughing)

- My little Indian!

You are fantastic!

- I want to take a bubble bath.

- Soon, baby.

You know, we have two visitors

and I don't know who they are or what we should do with them.

My men want to kill them

but, um, I'd like to know who it is I'm dispatching

so, baby, baby, if you could just find out for me, okay?

- And when do I get to take a bubble bath?

- I thought I answered that already, huh?

- And I want a hamburger.

- A hamburger. We're in the jungle.

- Then shoot a cow and grind him up.

(Michelle laughs)

And forget the horns, huh?

- Mmm, I missed you, mami.

- Mmm... - Yeah...

(both laughing)

- Stop. - Hey! Cuidado.

- God...

- Come here.

Mwuah!

- Whoop!

(Ramon laughing)

(Cat sighs)

- I wonder if Michelle really is in this place.

- Huh? - Michelle...

The girl we're looking for?

- Oh, yeah, sure.

- I need the bathroom.

Um, uh, baño?

- Do you really have to?

- No.

- We need water... food?

- Yeah, we haven't eaten all day, you know?

Sí, sí.

Uh, gracias.

- That was easy.

All we need is a key.

- I am a key.

Damn it...

Yes...

(Cat chuckles)

- I prefer real flowers.

The scent... the texture.

- Real flowers.

(lock clicks)

- Hmm... flowers do not rust.

(door creaks)

Shh...

♪

If we get out of here...

- When, please, say when.

- When we get out of here, do you know which way to go?

It's a jungle out there.

- Life is a jungle.

- Now, now, now, we need a map, not wisdom.

(man whistling)

Whew...

(Ramon whistling)

(water splashing)

- Hi.

(Nicole chuckles)

- Uh, hi.

- Michelle, right?

- That's me. - Well, put some clothes on.

We're gonna take you back to your uncle.

- Oh, that's why you're here.

Ramon didn't tell me that.

I was thinking of becoming a little jealous or something,

only I think you're a little too old for him.

- Speaking of old...

Exactly how old are you?

- Me? Um...

I'm 18.

Just... I'm just growing up.

And... how old are you?

- Oh, uh...

a little older.

(Nicole) - Hmm...

Just.

- Just. - Oh.

(knock at the door)

(Ramon) - Michelle.

Open up.

(Michelle giggles)

You okay, baby?

- I just got in the bath, I'm okay.

I'm okay, my lollipop.

- Those two women, they're running around loose.

- Shh... - So keep this door locked, okay?

- Okay! Mwuah!

(Michelle giggles)

- How come?

- Because...

I like you.

Besides...

I'm bored.

I wanna go get some men, huh?

- Whoa... hold on, kiddo.

- Oh... - I think we better get her

back to her uncle fast.

- I have no uncle.

- Yeah, right.

(Cat chuckles)

Well, that's not what the man who hired us said.

- Well, the man who hired you

likes to call me his niece or his nephew or his daughter

or whatever he feels like calling me at the time.

- Then he's nothing to you?

- No, he's a lot more than nothing.

(Tommy) - That's the only stretch of highway we haven't checked out.

- It's hot.

- Well... it's Ecuador.

- You could have said Alaska.

I'd feel better.

- Hey, hey, hey.

We'll get some air.

Why don't you check for bullet holes

and I'll see if there's somebody around to help us.

(engine stops)

(dog barking)

Hi, puppy.

Hello?

Uh, maybe they know something.

Hello?

Hey.

- We are closed, Señor.

No gas, no ice, no beer.

- I, I... no, no, it's okay, we don't want any of that stuff.

Uh, we just want to ask you a couple of questions.

- Are you the police?

- No, why?

- I don't like police.

But I still know nothing about anything.

- Well, I...

- Maybe there's a grown-up around.

- Hey, what...

What color was the car that Cat and Nicole rented?

- Mm... that color.

He'll talk now.

- He found me in the alley like some abandoned cat.

(Michelle sobs, then laughs)

I was 11 or something.

I don't really remember.

And he said he would teach me things.

Like I didn't already know those things.

- Are you saying he molested you?

- I don't know, can you molest a toy?

- Well, what about the law?

- Well, you've met him.

- Oh. Senator Zero.

- That's right. You ask silly questions.

- And this Ramon.

Did he know how old you were?

- It's different.

Raymond is my age.

He's 20 or something.

It's not the same.

- It's still statutory rape.

You were underage.

- It was? - Uh-huh.

- Cool. That kinda turns me on.

(Michelle blowing kisses)

(Nicole) - So...

What do we do now?

Take her back?

- How?

- Well, we can't leave her here.

Ramon aside, who knows what the gang is into?

- You forgetting our actions are severely limited?

I mean, we're still prisoners in this place.

And at the mercy of a bubblegum femme fatale

with the morals of an alley cat.

(Michelle growls, blows kiss)

- Who's not going to help us blow her scene.

(birds chirping)

- There, Tommy, just like I told you.

- Hey, little turd.

Guide us in.

- Okay!

Ramon!

(Ernesto runs off)

- Well, you sure had the golden touch.

How can any little kid resist such sweet words?

- Knock it off!

Gotta get in there.

- Alive.

- All right.

Stay here.

- Well, uh...

Hey, wait a minute.

- Look, no sense in us all going in.

Besides, we might need cover.

- I'd rather have an Uzi.

You know I don't like little guns.

- Well, give it back.

- No, uh...

It's bigger already.

Good luck.

- It's about skill, not luck.

- Okay... good skill.

- Right.

Rather have luck.

♪

(Michelle sighs, gasps)

- You guys wanna turn on?

Huh? What's the matter with me?

I can't believe I didn't think about this before.

♪ We can have a party ♪

I just brought in some primo powder,

but we have to be careful 'cause it's really, really strong.

It's been stepped on ever so lightly.

Hmm? I'm gonna call in Raymond

- Whoa! - Whoa!

- Ho-ho-ho, wait a minute, wait just a minute.

- But why?

Oh, come on, guys, he's really cool.

He's great.

- No, no, no. - Oh, come on.

I... you...

(Michelle giggling)

♪

(man grunting)

♪

(Joanna) Stay tuned.

The H.E.A.T. team will be back in a moment.

♪

- ♪ Lollipop, lollipop ♪

(both laughing)

- Having a party?

Hey, baby.

(Ramon laughs)

- They're not very nice.

And they don't want to party with us.

- Why? What did you tell 'em?

- I don't know.

(Nicole) - Nothing.

She told us nothing.

- Ramon, I told 'em about the new powder

and I thought, you know, we can all have a taste and everything.

- Oh, that's unfortunate.

I was thinking of letting them go.

- Oh... - Now it's impossible.

- We get to keep 'em? Yay!

(Michelle giggles)

- Not for long, okay?

- Okay.

Mwuah!

- Take the girls to my room.

♪

- So, ladies...

My apologies for the delay.

- Oh, take all the time you want.

You lowlife.

- Now, now, no sense in being bad friends.

(Nicole) - You intend to kill us

and you want to be friends.

Are you some kind of nut?

(Nicole chuckles)

- Untie them.

(Ramon chuckles)

- Why don't you do that?

- Okay.

but I'm gonna have to drop you first.

- My men will hear the shots.

- Yeah.

But you'll only hear the first one.

(Ramon chuckles)

- Okay.

- I oughta deck you.

How did you find us?

We figured we were history.

- Found your car.

- Our friend Ramon used to be Senator Zero's chauffeur.

He's the one who kidnapped Michelle.

- Don't be ridiculous.

I rescued her.

She's here willingly.

(Tommy chuckles)

- Yeah, right.

- He's sort of right.

She was a minor.

And no relation to our distinguished employer.

- So, what are you saying?

- That maybe we should think twice

about delivering her up to the guy

who has been molesting her since she was 11.

- There's more to it than that.

Follow it to its conclusion.

- I see that. The Senator...

didn't want a story about him and a teenage girl.

- And...

- And he wanted us to bring her back...

so he could kill her.

- Congratulations.

- But there is even more, Tommy.

Ramon and his friends have been using Michelle as a mule

to bring smack into the country.

An easy jump from here to Panama... and points north.

(man shouts, grunts, screams)

(Ramon) - Yeah...

Tie them up!

(Nicole) - Oh, again.

- Ramon, Michelle, she's o.d.'d.

- Tie them up!

- Wonderful.

The stupid bitch got a hold of some of our product

and managed to o.d.

Apparently her life and usefulness

are over at the same time.

No tears...

It's time to say good-bye.

We've had our fun but now...

it's over.

Maybe we'll meet again in another life.

And we can continue this pleasant friendship.

- He's certifiable.

- Totally.

(Ramon) - I really hate to cancel my ukulele lesson,

but I wouldn't miss this trip for the world.

Even if you people are only going halfway.

(Cat) - Well, don't come along on our account.

(Ramon) - It's quite all right, I have a delivery to make.

♪

(man) - All right, come on, move it!

(Nicole) - Okay!

- Come on.

- Don't turn around, just get in the van.

Come on, move it.

Drive!

(tires squealing)

(gunfire)

- Whoo-hoo! Whoo!

Oh, why do I do this so well?

- Michelle is still breathing!

- She won't last long. Neither will you!

- Tell the driver to take us to a hospital! Now!

- Aah! Hey...

(Michelle giggles)

- He's cute, don't you think?

(Michelle giggles)

I think so.

- Did you call him?

- Yup... and he's very happy that she'll live.

In fact, he's coming in person

to take her "home," as he put it.

And, uh, he's concerned that we remain discreet about this.

- And of course we were.

- Yes, of course.

♪

(needle snaps) - Damn it.

(Zero gasps)

- Just a moment.

Before you make the mistake of your lives...

Do you know who I am?

- Oh, they, they know who you are.

(laughing) They just don't care.

Especially dear Michelle.

- You...

You have to be silent.

The privilege of the client relationship.

You work for me!

(Cat) - Oh, we haven't said a word.

But they saw everything.

It's called attempted murder.

(Joanna) - We won't say a thing.

Scout's honor.

(Nicole) Hey, don't go away.

The H.E.A.T. team will be back in a moment

♪

(Joanna) - I just don't feel right about this.

Michelle is still in the hospital

and some of the gang is still loose.

- Well, the army's rounding them up now.

We have Ramon and the drugs

and there's a reward due us for that.

- Yes, and we also got the retainer from Señor Z-hee

he wrote.

- You're gonna keep that?

- Ye-heah.

That and the first-class tickets back to Puerto Vallarta.

(Joanna) - We shouldn't really stay.

- The hotel rooms are paid for,

the flight leaves in the morning...

Just enjoy this vacation.

Besides... you can swim in a different ocean.

- It's still the Pacific.

- Yeah, but it's a different part.

Look, we haven't got wet here and we deserve it.

We found Michelle, didn't we, huh?

(Joanna) - Hey!

How's Michelle?

- Consistent.

- What does that mean?

- It means she's in good health

and doing her thing again.

- Her thing?

- Yeah, she has stolen clothes

and she and that good-looking attendant ran away together.

- Gosh, she's only 18.

- She's legal but the boy is only 15.

- Then she's a wanted woman.

- Oh, they already found her.

- So let the police take care of her then.

We're off the hook.

- All right, come on, come on, come on, come on.

Are we gonna get in there or what?

♪

(Cat) - Come on!

(Tommy) - Game's on.

(Joanna) - Oh...

(Cat) - Don't even think about it.

(whooping and laughter)

♪

♪