Original subtitles

[GROANS]

Hm?

Oh!

Mm.

[SQUEALS SOFTLY]

[***]

No! No!

[CLAMORING]

Detective Suarez. What do we have?

Female, 28, goes by the name "Amina Husein,"

found wet dreaming and potentially bashing one out.

[GASPS] A bit of the old downstairs DJ?

It's possible. We've detected traces of residue on her.

What? No! KFC bargain bucket for one.

Let's bring her in.

No. Yes, sir.

You have the right to remain silent...

[OFFICER CONTINUES] [SCREAMING]

What had just happened? Surely it wasn't a--

[GASPS] SAIRA: Bro.

[GASPS] You okay?

Oh! Heh. I'm grand.

I'm grand. Yeah.

Coffee?

Thank you.

Oh, Saira. Come on. Stay. You don't have to go yet.

Nah, nah, nah. All good. Don't want to impose.

Well, you're not imposing.

Come on, st-- [GROWLS]

Okay, fine. See you at rehearsals.

No rehearsal this week. Right. Yeah.

AMINA: Together we had decided

that we each needed a break from the band.

A few days to decompress

after the binfire that was the photoshoot.

[SCREAMS]

Any fun plans for the day?

Fun plans? No. No plans. Plan-free, me. Plan free.

AMINA: Saira's behavior was indeed a little peculiar...

but could you blame her?

Without rehearsals, we were each flying solo.

Cast adrift. Left to our own devices.

AMINA: Bisma, in particular, had been triggered by recent events

and was using her timeout to reflect.

It's like everyone-- Everyone-- Everyone just tries to--

To Spice Girl us, you know? Like-- Like, the band--

Everyone's-- Everyone's trying to Spice Girl us.

Mm. I'm gonna need more words than that.

[STAMMERS]

Ayesha's, like... Sexy Spice, and Saira's Cool Spice.

Amina's Girl-Next-Door Spice, and do you know who I am?

I am-- I am Mummy Spice. I am... Wholesome, Boring Spice.

I am Desexualized From Head-to-Toe Spice.

I'm Amoeba-Spice.

Okay. First of all, you are wholesome and hot.

Ugh. And, if anything,

it's giving Variety Spice.

I mean, what would you rather, them sexualized you?

Yes! Really?

No. Mm.

I don't know.

Well, I do.

[***]

Wow.

[BOTH LAUGH]

I--

Yes. [CHUCKLES]

[CHUCKLES] See?

So, how much do I owe you?

Hey, don't feel the need to give me mates rates--

Are you really just gonna hide my work like that?

Your scalp is literally still raw.

How about we just leave it out for a while.

Tobi.

What?

Come on. I'm Muslim.

Yeah, I know. I know. But Bisma, we're Black.

Our hair is art.

It's a powerful part of identity, too.

Oh, yeah. Sure. One sec.

[***]

Yeah, man. Love this stuff. This is my total jam.

That's marmalade. Marmalade is my jam. Get it?

Marmalade is your jam? Yeah, marmalade is my jam.

AMINA: Ayesha was enjoying time away from the band,

as she was taking her relationship

to the next level.

Grocery shopping.

Now, this is totally fire.

You are lucky you're so cute, because what the hell was that?

I mean-- You loved it.

Here it comes.

You're, Ayesha, no?

Yeah.

I thought so.

See? I told you. That's Nabila, my eldest. She's 16.

Your music has really helped her.

I mean, normally she barely even talks,

but now she's singing your lyrics all the time.

So, I suppose in a way, you're speaking for her.

Mm. That's lovely.

You're pretty.

[CHUCKLES] She's pretty.

Is this your girlfriend? You're gay, aren't you?

Oh, wait. Wait. What's that word? "Queer."

Queer? Just not heterosexual.

I think Nabila might be, you know, not heterosexual.

She's not my girlfriend.

No, it feels like you're embarrassed of me, okay?

You never acknowledge us outside of us!

The band knows! My brother knows!

No, your parents don't know, Ayesha.

I don't subscribe to the whole coming out thing.

I'm not gonna sit here

and make some Shakespearean announcement,

uh, to invite, what, further persecution

and hardship into my personal life.

I'm sorry. I'm not an emotional masochist.

Persecution? You live in London.

Your parents are literally so cool.

Like, your dad posts Lady Parts on Facebook.

Honestly, he probably already knows!

Sick.

Amazing.

Conversation's done then, isn't it? A bit redundant.

You know, there's nuances to being gay and Muslim

that you're not gonna get.

Nice.

I can't argue with that now, can I?

I just want you to acknowledge me. Us.

[DOOR OPENS]

Fuck. Laura!

[FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING]

[***]

WOMAN [ON TV]: So, my great-great grandma has been...I think...

AMINA: As for me, I was thrumming with anxiety.

Had my villain era led me to a life of debauchery?

[***]

[GASPS]

Amina?

Amina. Sorry. Yes. No.

What's up with you? Nothing.

It's not nothing.

Why won't you tell me? Because.

As you're well aware, you have a tendency to be somewhat...

judgey.

So... apologies if I'm... not so forthcoming.

[CRYING] Noor?

Sorry. I'm n--

You okay? It's just hormones.

That's all. It's-- I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I'm judgey.

It's okay. It's okay.

It's okay. No, no. It's not okay.

What if my kid doesn't wanna talk to me

because she thinks I'm judgey?

No, no, no, no. No. Oh, I'm sorry. Okay. Listen. Listen.

Your kid will talk to you. Okay? Okay, look. Look, um...

Listen, Billy-- [SNIFFLES]

[EXHALES]

Billy... kissed me, and-- I don't know. I lingered.

For a bit. That's just what happened.

I know. I know. Okay?

It's a one-way ticket to the fiery pits of hell, you know?

Bring on the factor-fifty, 'cause I'mma get a roasted.

[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY] I feel awful. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Please don't be angry at me. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Amina?

If you are going to hell,

then really isn't any hope for the rest of us.

You're a good person, okay?

And I love you.

[CRYING]

AMINA: It felt good to finally be open and honest with Noor.

No more secrets.

You're the band I've been waiting for a really long time.

Okay, I think Lady Parts could be huge,

and I can help you get there.

Okay, I'll talk to the others,

but, like I said, we've already got management.

[SIGHS] All right. How successful do you want to be?

'Cause if you want to spend your career playing weddings

and little venues across the U.K., then yeah, sure, fine,

stay with your mate.

But if you want a real, wide-reaching platform

for your voice, which I think you can have,

then let me help you.

And right now you should be recording an album.

I-- I know and, and we will.

We've actually got two days

with Dirty Mahmood in Molico Studios.

Oh, wow. Dirty Mahmood's great.

Yeah. No, it's perfect for you guys, actually.

And Molico is fantastic. But two days?

I mean, you need two weeks or a month.

It's your first album. It's important.

I know. It's-- It's just--

Look, a record deal would cover all recording costs

for a debut album with Dirty Mahmood.

But done properly.

I mean, what he did with Sister Squire,

the man's a genius, you know? You can't be rushed.

I love Sister Squire! Heh. She's incredible.

Yeah. I listen to her vinyl all the time.

Like, I need her in my ears, you know?

Yeah, I know. She's ahead of her time.

Yeah. You-- Actually, you, Lady Parts,

you remind me of her, actually.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

[GROANS LOUDLY]

AMINA: Taz, on the other hand,

was spending the hiatus hustling hard,

desperate to find the funds for us to record the album.

He was the last promoter. I just-- I--

I don't have the grease. Psh.

Chin up, kiddo. "The dream is free.

The hustle is sold separately."

Where'd you get that?

Inspirationalquotes.com

You know what this guy says to me? This-- This prick?

He says, "Who are you?"

"Right? If your band are so great

like you say they are, then wh--

Why are they with you? What-- Who are you?"

[SIGHING] All right then.

[SIGHS] [GRUNTS]

Who are you? I don't know. What--?

You're doing all this insane shit and "I don't know?"

I-- I-- I-- I-- What is Momtaz Records?

I don't know!

Momtaz, seriously?

[EXHALES] Youth clubs.

You want Momtaz Records to be a youth club? Like a... charity?

No, it-- Uh-- It's just-- I'm--

There are no youth clubs or community centers anymore,

where kids can play music together.

Uh, th-- There's no spaces. Okay, so?

So...

Yeah, I guess--

Momtaz Records would be a space--

A space.

Yeah, for-- For bands to grow themselves.

You know, find their sound, have a platform.

Looked after by me or something.

But it-- Right, it'll be a business, somehow, with--

I mean, nights and events and--

Gosh, I don't know.

See? That wasn't so hard. Hm.

AMINA: As Momtaz pondered what her future could be...

Bisma, too, was in deep contemplation.

Who was she? And how did she want to be seen?

WASIM: Is this a crisis of faith?

No. I've never been stronger in my faith. It's not about that.

[SIGHING] Okay, so...

It's-- Ah--

I love my headscarf.

It-- It gives me strength in so many ways, different ways,

but-- I am also a Black woman and--

And hair is an important part of that.

[SIGHS] Looking less Muslim isn't gonna make you

more popular with fans. Taifa wears a hijab.

I know that, Wasim! It's not about being popular!

Are you even listening to me? I'm just--

I'm just trying to figure this out.

I'm just trying to figure myself out.

Maybe a spa weekend? And, um, get your nails done?

Oh, my God. What the fuck?

I just wanna try a different form of self-expression.

I-- I thought maybe you'd be more supportive.

I know. Look, I know. I'm sorry. I support you. I'm just scared.

You know how people are.

People are going to question you and your faith.

And they can be mean. Really, really mean.

[GROANS] "Fake Muslim" and all that.

Look. I mean-- You know!

Look, any woman who we know has ever tried to take it off,

they have a shit time of it. Look, baby.

I love you.

And I believe that you should do

whatever it is that you want.

But this--

Schoolgirl. Wife. Mother.

That was my journey, Wasim.

Schoolgirl. Wife. Mother.

You don't sound so happy about that.

No, it's just-- Life, it happened to me, you know?

And I'm-- And I'm an adult, and I--

And I wanna make choices as an adult.

And-- And people, they-- They put these labels on me.

And the way they see me, I don't see myself.

How-- O-- Okay. So, how exactly do you want to be seen then?

I don't know!

Oh, is it that you don't feel sexy?

Oh, my God, Wasim! Seriously?!

Well, what is it then?! I told you, I don't know!

[SOBBING] I don't know!

IMANI: What's going on?

Um, baby-- Um... baby--

[CRACKLES]

[***]

[SOBBING]

* Baby, you understand me now *

* If sometimes You see that I'm mad *

* Don't you know No one in life *

* Can always be an angel *

* When things go wrong You see some bad *

* But I'm just a soul Whose intentions are good *

* Oh, Lord, please don't let me Be misunderstood *

* If I seem edgy I want you to know *

* I never meant To take it out on you *

* Life has its problems *

* And I've had More than my share *

* But that's one thing I never mean to do *

* 'Cause I love you *

* Oh, baby, I'm just human *

* Don't you know I have thoughts like anyone *

* And then sometimes I find myself alone *

* Regretting Some little foolish thing *

* Some simple thing That I've done *

* 'Cause I'm just a soul Whose intentions are good *

* Oh, Lord, please don't let me Be misunderstood *

[WIND WHISTLING]

TEACHER: All right ladies. Everyone on their ball.

AMINA: After my breakthrough with Noor,

she had invited me to her pregnancy class

for some female bonding.

A little check in before we get started. Around the room. Go.

Hi, everyone. I'm Reshma.

I'm at 5 months, and I've stopped throwing up.

Nausea, all gone. [CLASS COMMENTS]

But I have started eating dirt, so...

[ALL GROAN] Oh, my God.

Yeah.

I'm Farida.

Um, I'm at 8 months.

And I'm-- Yeah, I'm just gonna have to say this, aren't I?

Apologies, sisters, um-- I'm just really horny.

Actually. Right now. Every day, to be honest.

Yeah, and I just don't know what to do about it. I--

You need to feel those feelings. Feel those feelings.

I'm Amina. I'm not pregnant.

[LAUGHS]

[MOUTHS] Noor.

Um, I'm Noor. I'm also eight months.

And, um... I'm scared I'm not going to be a good mum.

And, um, this is Amina. She's my best friend.

My only friend... right now, in fact.

And, um...

I think the reason that Amina feels so much shame

is because I've made her feel that way.

And the truth is, Amina--

Noor?

I'm no good. Oh--

I'm sorry.

Noor, you're great. What are you on about?

No! I'm a bad person.

I had sex!

That is abundantly obvious to everyone here.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

Before I was married.

Oh.

Oh. I'm sorry, Amina.

I'm sorry I made you feel bad. When I'm the slut.

I'm the one going to hell, factor-fifty, Roast Town.

Noor, you're amazing.

And you're going to be a great mum.

Oh, my God. I-- I shouldn't be having this baby.

What?

I shouldn't be having this baby. No, no, stop.

Oh, my God. I shouldn't be having this baby.

Stop it. I shouldn't be having this baby.

Fuck this shit! Everyone up on their feet, now!

Anyone feeling shame around their bodies,

their human desires.

We about to cast that shit out, because we are women.

We aren't the pure image of perfection.

We are messy, beautiful, horny, and some of us,

heavily pregnant and very hungry.

So hungry. So, on your feet

and ground down into your uterus.

[GROANS]

All right, ladies.

Now chant with me.

Vagina. Hm?

Vagina, vagina.

Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Vagina!

[BEETHOVEN'S "ODE TO JOY" PLAYING IN GERMAN]

[SIGHS]

AMINA: Ahem. Vagina.

Vagina! Vagina! Vagina! Vagina!

Oh-- [YELPS]

Jeez.

I thought you were a badger.

Not a badger.

Just me. Heh-heh.

Amina. Okay, I'm just going to, um--

I'm so sorry. I-- I know it's late.

And, uh, it's weird me being here.

[CHUCKLES]

I-- I just wanted to check you're all okay.

Uh, Billy told me what happened.

Yes, I got your texts.

I'm okay, Ahsan, really. Nothing to worry about.

Tha-- Great. That's great. Um, question.

I know it's none of my business...

but do you think you're gonna see him again?

Uh, Billy?

I think so. And he's really sorry.

I should hear him out.

Cool, I just-- I--

I just think, um, you should know something.

Uh, I-- I'm only saying this because I care about you,

and I know it's weird.

Just say it.

I'm pretty sure Billy is exoticizing you.

He's all, like, ex-- Excited about dating a hijabi.

Like you're some-- I don't know.

It's giving that... forbidden f-- Fruit energy.

Wow.

Okay. Yeah, I know, I'm sorry.

Is someone finding me attractive

that unfathomable to you

that they must be exoticizing me?

What? No, Amina, that's not what I meant.

[SCOFFS] Maybe I'm exoticizing him.

Ever thought of that? I mean, I gotta say,

I do love me some, you know, young, floppy-haired Don McLean.

"Ooh! Nom-nom-nom. Yummy."

[LAUGHING] What-- Hey, wasn't your last girlfriend white?

Was she-- Was she exoticizing you? Or n--

No, wait, it doesn't apply to you, does it?

Because you're this perfect man,

and I'm just this unlovable freak.

Just because you don't want me

doesn't mean no one else will.

I do want you! Amina--

I do... want you.

Are you being serious right now?

What?

So, now someone else possibly likes me,

you like me, too, all of a sudden?

That's really--

[SCOFFING] That's really basic of you.

No, no-- Amina, um-- Just want--

No, just fucking leave me alone!

[SNIFFLING]

[DOOR OPENS, SLAMS]

[***]

[***]

AMINA: It was a new day,

and Saira had asked us to meet her at Molico Studios.

All our problems were momentarily suspended

in this glorious presence.

It's crazy right?

We're in Molico Studios.

Molico fucking Studios!

[LAUGHING]

Yo! Wow! We've done it.

[CHATTING INDISTINCTLY]

BISMA: How did Taz get us in?

Listen. I haven't invited Taz to this, because I wanted

to talk it through with you lot first, before--

Look, I know it's shitty but--

Okay, I'm just gonna--

I met this woman, Clarice, she's a top manager

and she wants to sign us.

But we already have a manager.

No, I know. But if we sign with Clarice,

we're heading straight into label meetings,

then getting a slot at Glastonbury,

and touring this year,

and we'd have time to record the album covered by the label.

We wouldn't have to do it in two days,

we'd have weeks and weeks, however long we need.

Clarice booked us this room so we can see what it's like.

[SCOFFS] Clarice? Who's Clarice?

[EXHALES] We wouldn't have to do any more shitty jobs.

We could make music for a living, like a real band.

Yeah. I mean, sounds amazing. But... what about Taz?

Well, that's the problem.

Clarice would be our manager.

So, yeah. I don't know what to do.

MOMTAZ: I do.

Taz? How did you--? Amina texted me.

Sorry. I didn't know I wasn't supposed to.

Guys, you have to do it.

[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

You are doing it.

All right, you have to.

Listen, I can't get you the gigs you want.

Oh, look-- Trust me, I've-- I've tried, and--

I don't know, it's--

It's more important that Lady Parts

become the greatest band in the world than my--

My whatever, ego.

You're doing it. You have to do it. Right?

Lady Parts is more important than any one of us.

Taz, we're still just talking. Yeah.

Okay, Saira-- Okay-- It's cool. I'll be fine. Okay?

I-- I've got other bands now, remember?

[EXHALES SOFTLY]

Now you guys better go out there and show the world who you are.

Who we are.

Capiche?

Taz. Taz. Taz.

And don't become rockstar dickheads, all right?

SAIRA: Taz. AYESHA: Taz.

Taz! [DOOR CLOSES]

[SIGHS] Fuck.

[TV DRONING INDISTINCTLY]

[CLICKS OFF]

[SOBBING]

[***]

[RASHA NAHAS' "HABBATEK" PLAYING IN ARABIC]

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