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MAN ON RADIO: Good morning, Monstropolis!
DJs Slinky Stinkwell and Jimmy the Booger Boy
want you to know the sun is shining
and the birds are screeching.
It's a new day,
so go out and embrace it.
Yeah, I'm gonna embrace the snot out of it.
(ROARS) (YELPS AND THUDS)
(BOTH LAUGH)
(ROARS) (SCREAMS)
(BOTH LAUGH)
Mmm-hmm.
(TYLOR ROARS) (YELPS)
(BOTH LAUGH)
"For Tylor, wishing you a scare-filled first day.
"Johnny and your Fear Co. family."
(LAUGHS) MILLIE: Wow,
a gift basket and a company car.
Oh, thank goodness they found a job for you after all.
Oh, hey, I want to celebrate my new job
by taking the whole family out to a fancy dinner.
How about La Petite Grr? Oh!
The waiters all know me there.
Tylor, I just want to make sure
you're taking this Fear Co. job
because you want to,
and not because you're worried about us.
I told you the store is doing fine.
Yeah, we're entering key making season.
This is what I want, Mom.
I've dreamed of being a scarer my whole life,
And now... (CHUCKLES)
I'm finally doing it.
Oh. We're proud of you, hon.
Hey, where's that perky orange rainbow
with the doughnuts?
You mean Val? (SHUSHING)
Yeah, I... I gotta go.
Knock 'em dead, baby.
But just figuratively,
because killing has consequences.
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(MUSIC PLAYING)
Tonight's top explosive story,
Monsters, Inc. in chaos.
Thanks to the investigative journalism of yours truly,
we now know Monsters, Inc. was found harboring
Henry J. Waternoose IV,
the son of criminal mastermind Henry J Waternoose III.
Here's Jack, with his thoughts
on the future of laugh power
and the all but certain failure
of Monsters, Incorporated.
(SOBBING)
Laugh power failed me!
MONSTER: Hi, Val.
Congratulations. (LAUGHS) Thanks.
Hey, it's our newest jokester.
Good morning. I brought donuts.
(LAUGHS) Force of habit.
You want one? Donut
mind if I do. Ah-ah-ah.
Hey. Didn't your doctor say
you needed to cut back on sweets?
I'll take one for the team.
Actually, I'll take two for the team.
(MIKE GROANS) Mmm!
MONSTER: Hey, congrats, Val.
If I want to eat my feelings,
I can.
Look how skinny my legs are.
Congrats, Val.
Thank you.
So, yesterday was a lot.
But the good news is, kid,
it's your first day as a jokester,
and with you on the team,
laugh power is sure to bounce back.
Right, all the way, back to the top.
MIKE: Here we are, kid.
Soak it all in.
This is your moment.
Thanks, Mr. Wazowski.
Call me Mike.
Thanks, Mr. Mike Wazowski.
(TIRES SQUEAL)
There you go, buddy.
Don't scratch it.
That's a company car.
(LAUGHS)
Oh, hey!
Welcome, Tylor.
I am so glad we had a spot open up.
Did your family enjoy the basket we sent over?
Oh, yeah, especially my dad.
He ate all of it. (CHUCKLES)
Even the decorative soaps.
But thanks so much.
And and for the car, too.
I dropped it off at the valet.
Uh, we don't have a valet.
(ENGINE TURNS OVER)
MONSTER: Yeah! Free car!
Whoo!
(CHUCKLES)
Hey, excuse me, everybody.
Let's give a big old roar to our newest scarer,
Tylor Tuskmon.
(ALL CHEERING)
Here you go, Tylor. Have a great first day.
Why, thank you, Hazel.
Oh, I, uh, got something for you.
It's just a mock up from the Creepshow simulator. (GASPS)
Oh, wow!
My own scare card, look at that.
Tylor "The Terrible."
Not too bad, huh?
That's terrible in a good way, though, right?
(BOTH CHUCKLE) Oh, of course.
(ELEVATOR DINGS) Oh, we better hurry.
Don't want to miss the morning huddle.
(TYLOR SIGHS)
Finally, the scare floor.
JOHNNY: Tylor,
welcome to the first day of the rest of your life.
(EPIC MUSIC PLAYING)
Wow!
(GASPS)
(CHUCKLES)
This is incredible.
(TYLOR GASPS)
I can't believe I'm finally here.
Wow! I mean, I thought this would be big,
but this is so much bigger than I imagined.
DECLAN: Hello.
Good tidings, sir.
Hey! Welcome to the floor, Tylor.
Oh! Hey, Joy.
Yeah, no, happy to be here.
Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Skyler.
Yes, we have met quite a few times.
Hi.
And this is your assistant,
Chompy. TYLOR: Chompy! Hi!
No, no, no, no. No. No.
Chompy takes a pretty dim view of being touched.
Here. Go fetch.
Nice to, uh...
Meet you.
All right. Scarers,
bring it in.
You are all an important part of Fear Co's. legacy.
You know it.
And now it's up to each of you
to carry that legacy on.
The leaderboard has been wiped clean,
so who's going to be the leader today?
Is it you? (ROARS)
Is it you? (ROARS)
Is it... Skyler?
Is it you? Oh. Me? I, uh...
Claws and paws in for your Co. motto, on three.
One, two, three.
ALL: Let fear power you!
(ALL ROARING)
Monsters at the ready.
Prepare to scare.
(SIREN BLARING)
(GROANS)
(SIGHS) You know, I, uh...
I've never actually, uh, scared a human child before,
just the simulators in college. (CHUCKLES)
Just go in there and be who you are meant to be.
VAL: Oh, wow. Okay, this is real.
(LAUGHS) I'm freaking out.
Now just get in there
and be who you are meant to be.
(BOTH SIGH)
(ROARS) (KID SCREAMS)
Look out, evil frowners,
it is I, Captain Funny Bone,
and her laughter filled partner Chuckling Charlie
(ROARS) (KID SCREAMS)
Uh, this is Val to ground control,
permission to make a silly landing
at Hillary International Airport.
Permission granted.
VAL: Copy that.
(TYLOR ROARS) (KIDS SCREAM)
(TYLOR ROARS) (KIDS SCREAM)
(TYLOR ROARS) (KIDS SCREAM)
VAL: Ooh, big fan of space.
Me too. I'm an astronaut,
and I'm gonna put my foot on the moon. (GIRL LAUGHS)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
TYLOR: Wow!
I am definitely not at Monsters, Inc. anymore.
Looking good, everyone.
Great teamwork.
(ALL CHEERING)
Oh, Val, you are a jokester.
All right. You're cutting it up in there.
Just like a compound miter saw.
Hey, hearty congratulations to you, dear Valerie.
Thanks, Roger. Or do you prefer Henry?
Oh! Just Roger will do.
That was my childhood nickname
back in New Squealand. New Squealand.
(LAUGHS) Yep. I called it. (GROANS)
ROGER: Yep, that's right.
You see, my mom's from there.
"Sweet as," as she would say.
You're as sweet as can be, Roger.
Hey, Val, the next kid's pile is on your desk.
Sorry, guys. Work calls.
I went a whole childhood without hugs.
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
(SIGHS)
Excuse me!
Move! (GASPS)
(IMITATING SIREN)
Emergency mouse siren.
We had a 1303,
which turned into a 503,
and if we're not careful,
it's gonna be up 216.
Well, my ex here was never good at communicating.
She's saying something about the canisters leaking.
They're not just leaking.
They're empty.
They're all empty.
It says they're full, but they're all empty.
MIKE: All right, okay. What's the deal?
The weeks' worth of laugh power we have is just gone,
and now we don't have enough to get us through the day.
So, right now we're in the green zone,
but if the energy falls into the red...
Well, what happens if it falls into the red zone?
Is it surprisingly something good?
Because we haven't had a lot of that.
When? Not if.
But when the city's demand for power
exceeds our supply,
it's lights out.
MIKE: The lights still work now, though, right?
I'm sorry to be such a downer.
I could bake something to help us all feel better.
Who's hungry? Okay, everyone,
we have to generate every gigawatt we can
to avoid a blackout.
Go, jokesters,
keep getting more gigawatts
so the city doesn't plunge into darkness.
(SIGHS)
Yes!
Anybody care for a 36 and a half hour energy drink?
It makes you extremely alert
and completely aware of your surroundings.
(GRUNTS) Ooh, sorry, boss.
Nah, he's fine.
As the saying goes, "Comedy is pain plus time."
I'm good. Just gonna pop my shoulder back in real quick.
ROGER: Ooh. Watch out, more canisters incoming.
(MACHINE DINGS)
DECLAN: May I have your attention
our new scarer, Tylor Tuskmon,
is climbing the leaderboard in dramatic fashion.
You'd best have your wits about you, Joy. Mm?
Soon you'll be dethroned.
Next stop, retirement.
Or worse, irrelevant.
(GROWLS AND HISSES)
Hey, you know, I'm not here to dethrone anybody, you know.
I... I mean, we're working together.
We're, uh... we're work buds.
Am I right? (HISSES)
Don't talk to me, bro.
(DOOR SLAMS) Whoa!
What was that?
Yeah, she made Skyler cry last week.
(BUZZER SOUNDS) And that's lunchtime.
Your 15 minutes starts now.
Fifteen minutes? What?
That's barely enough time to check out the pastry case.
Oh! Hey, does anybody want to grab, uh, lunch?
MONSTER: Hurry up!
You don't want to end up like Rosie.
Rosie?
Hey, Declan, what, uh... What happened to Rosie?
Huh, she was late from lunch
and she wasn't pulling her numbers.
Wait, she was fired?
But everything about Rosie is scary.
That, that... That must've been a mistake.
I'm... I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go talk to Johnny about it.
Don't worry, we're super tight.
And, uh, you... You left.
Yeah, no, that, that... That makes sense.
We only have 15 minutes. Well, 13 now.
Tylor stop talking.
Let's go! Let's go.
We have to avoid a blackout.
Pick up the pace everyone.
Oh, except you, Googly Bear.
You're going a little too fast.
I've never felt better... (EXCLAIMS INDISTINCTLY)
(BUZZER SOUNDS)
(ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
Yeah... Huh?
Space helmet... (GASPS)
Oh, that was close. (GROANS)
I almost lost my science fiction slash romance novel.
What's going on down there?
CUTTER: We're transferring the canisters as fast as we can.
No red on my watch.
Oh, hey, Chet. Whoa, whoa.
And where do you think you're going?
I just need to talk to Johnny about my friend Rosie.
Let me just check the schedule here.
Oh! You're not going to believe this.
You can see Johnny for six minutes.
Oh, nice.
Three weeks from now.
Right now, he's very busy
preparing for a press conference.
Oh. Okay.
Uh, hey, do you want to grab lunch?
Oh, I'd love to,
but I have to dine at my desk alone,
just in case Johnny needs me.
Oh. Okay.
Uh, yeah. Sure.
(SIGHS)
Well, at least this is better than eating a frozen rot dog
over my bathroom sink.
Again.
MONSTER: Yeah. TYLOR: Something smells good. Am I right?
That sure looks delicious.
(BUZZER SOUNDS) DECLAN: Lunch time is over.
Please report back to your stations immediately.
(SWALLOWS)
(ALARM SOUNDING) (CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
SKYLER: Yeah! Skyler, wins.
Mmm.
(SIGHS) I'm so sick of her being number one.
That's right. I worked through lunch.
I'll eat when I'm dead.
If you come for the queen, you better not miss.
That goes for all of you losers.
You're all useless and weak.
Your reign of terror is ending, Your Highness.
Tylor will beat you.
It's just a matter of time.
Yeah. You're, you're... You're rude and mean
and make us all feel bad about ourselves.
Yeah, I had to start doing daily affirmations.
I am worthy.
I'm putting money on Tylor.
Yeah, me too. Me too, me too.
I'll put money on Skyler. Yeah.
(GROWLS)
No jokester is gonna outscare me.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
Tylor, go in there and get enough scares
so you're number one.
Come on, Tylor.
Fill that can.
(SIGHS) Let's do this.
ALL: (CHANTING) Tylor! Tylor! Tylor! Tylor! Tylor! Tylor!
Tylor! Tylor! Tylor! Tylor!
(THUNDER RUMBLES)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(THUNDER RUMBLES)
(ROARS LOUDLY) Huh?
(GASPS)
Ben?
Tylor? Uh... But I, uh...
Sorry, buddy, uh... BEN: What are you doing?
Look, I uh... (THUDS)
BEN: Is this a new joke?
Uh, I... Where are your donuts?
I can't do this door.
I know this kid. Just give me another one.
We're not letting you out until you fill that canister and eliminate Joy.
ALL: Fill the can!
Down with Joy!
ALL: Fill the can! (TYLOR SIGHS)
(TYLOR PANICKING) ALL: Fill the can!
BEN: I was worried you were mad at me
because I didn't like your donut joke before.
TYLOR: Yeah, well... Hey, hey,
check out my new recorder.
I just learned this new song.
(BLOWS RECORDER)
It's not very good,
but my mom says I need practice. (PANICKING)
BEN: Oh, hey, I finally finished that comic book
I told you about... MILLIE: The only scary thing
is living with regret.
TYLOR: This is what I want, Mom.
I dreamed of being a scarer my whole life,
and now... (CHUCKLES)
...I'm finally doing it.
BERNARD: You can't escape who you are...
(TYLOR PANICKING) ...so just embrace it.
BEN: Tylor, what do you think? (CLAMORING)
Tylor, are you okay? BERNARD: Just embrace it.
What's wrong? (TYLOR MUMBLING)
BERNARD: Just embrace it.
(ROARS LOUDLY)
(BEN SCREAMS IN FRIGHT)
Tylor, stop.
(GROWLS LOUDLY) (BEN SCREAMING)
(CANISTER DINGS)
(BEN CRYING)
Please.
I thought we were friends.
(BEN SOBBING)
(BEN CRYING)
Huh...
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(BEN CRYING)
ALL: The can is full!
The can is full!
The can is full!
(ALL CLAMORING)
ALL: Tylor! Tylor! Tylor!
Tylor! Tylor! Tylor!
DECLAN: Well done.
We have a new number one on the leaderboard,
Tylor "The Terrible" Tuskmon!
ALL: Tylor! Tylor! Tylor!
(TYLOR SOBBING)
(BREATHES HEAVILY)
(SIGHS)
(MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING)
JOHNNY: Hey, careful with that card, huh.
It's going to be worth a lot someday.
Chet said you were looking for me.
You know, I've always got time for you,
regardless of what he says.
Between the two of us,
Chet is a little overprotective.
Ben was really upset.
Ben? A little boy I used to make laugh
back at Monsters, Inc.
Tylor, those days are over.
It's time to focus on your future.
Come on, kid.
First day
and you're already top of the leaderboard.
I knew I was right about you.
I'm glad to see you're finally embracing who you are.
TYLOR: I'm not sure if I like it.
Well, I like it.
And I think
so will everyone else.
REPORTER 1: Johnny... REPORTER 2: It's Johnny...
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
(CHUCKLING)
Huh!
CELIA: Well done, monsters.
We reached our goal today and prevented a blackout.
Let's not think about
how we'll have to do it again tomorrow,
and just say hooray for now.
ALL: Hooray for now.
Yes! (CHUCKLES)
You put us over the top, Val.
And so did this energy drink.
Is my eye red?
Because it's very itchy.
Anybody got eye drops?
Ah.
Thank you, Cameron.
(ALARM SOUNDING)
Whoo-ee!
That was close.
(GASPS)
Uh...
This is close.
And if my tongue licks your eyeball,
it's not my fault. Oh.
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
Thank you. Thank you all for coming.
We've all seen the news
and how our friends at Monsters, Incorporated
have had their issues,
so we are expediting the unveiling
of our Fear Co. scream amplifier
that makes screams more powerful than laughs.
REPORTER: Oh. JOHNNY: We'll soon have more power
than we know what to do with.
And I am very excited
to announce that we even have the former scarer
turned jokester turned scarer again,
Tylor "The Terrible" Tuskmon,
joining the Fear Co. family.
Look at him over there, huh? Isn't he something, folks?
He's great.
In fact, I'm promoting him to Vice President of Scaring.
What? (REPORTERS CLAMORING)
JOHNNY: Number one on his first day.
I haven't seen talent like that since...
Well, me. (LAUGHS) (ALL LAUGHING)
The other power companies may tinker with new ideas,
but you can't reliably power homes... (ALARM SOUNDS)
...with good intentions.
While laugh power has its merits,
it's not who we are.
It's a monster's nature to be scary.
Fear, it's our tradition,
but it's also human children's.
We may rely on their screams to power our city,
but human children need us to be terrifying.
They tell stories about us
at sleepovers and around campfires.
We have a responsibility to keep kids scared,
and I take that responsibility very seriously,
as did my father before me.
Fear Co. will continue that proud tradition,
because fear is power.
Let fear power you.
It's powering me right now.
It's coursing through my veins.
And now I'll take your questions.
REPORTER 1: Mr. Worthington... REPORTER 2: And Johnny,
what... (ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
Ah... Huh?
I'll see you in the stars.
And...
Save.
No!
MONSTER 1: Whoa!
MONSTER 2: Was that a blackout?
Clearly this is Monsters, Incorporated's fault.
REPORTER 1: I knew this would happen.
REPORTER 2: Uh, Johnny, over here please?
REPORTER 3: Over here! REPORTER 4: Over here!
Uh, Mr. Worthington?
Look, I'm not sure what's going on here, folks,
but don't worry,
Fear Co's power grid remains secure,
and we will fix everything with our scream amplifier.
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
What's going on? What happened to the power?
And this whole Vice President thing,
I thought I was just a scarer.
What did I just say, Tylor?
Don't worry.
I've taken care of everything.
Where are we?
I like to think of it as my own private lair.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(CANISTER CLANKING)
That's a laugh canister from Monsters, Inc.
Yes, it is.
And it's time my vice president learned the whole truth.
You see, I've got somebody on the inside,
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
(GASPS) Randall?
Boggs. (LAUGHS EVILLY)
Mission accomplished,
boss.
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