Original subtitles

(upbeat, electronic music)

(animals chirping)

♫ Down along the bayous down in Louisiana

♫ Spanish moss hanging from the cypress leaves

♫ Little piece of heaven nestled in the swampland

♫ Soggy Bottom Louisiana hidden in the trees

♫ Cottonmouths and alligators chasing down a dinner

♫ The chasing-ist place that you ever did see

♫ Soggy Bottom citizens chasing down a dream or two

♫ Hound dog chasing a coon and run him up a tree

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna try and tree a coon

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna get away

♫ Look out for Sooner cause he's gonna hang a mooner

♫ Gotta get movin better get out my way

♫ Revenuers hanging round a moonshiners hollar

♫ Moonshiners gotta make a move if he can

♫ Everybody's running from the skeeters and the chiggers

♫ Moonshiner running from the revenuer man

♫ Cottonmouths and alligators chasing down a dinner

♫ It's the chasing-ist place that you ever did see

♫ Soggy Bottom citizens chasing down a dream or two

♫ Hound dog chase a coon and run him up a tree

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna catch a moonshiner

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna get away

♫ Look out for Sooner cause he's gonna hang a mooner

♫ Gotta get moving better get out my way

♫ Cottonmouths and alligators chasing down a dinner

♫ It's the chasing-ist place that you ever did see

♫ Soggy Bottom citizens chasing down a dream or two

♫ Hound dog chase a coon and run him up a tree

(horse galloping and whinnying)

♫ Pretty as a picture on the Louisiana bayou

♫ Smell a magnolia in the Gulf Coast breeze

♫ Little piece of heaven nestled in the swampland

♫ Soggy Bottom Louisiana hidden in the trees

- Morning gator.

(animal howling)

(fast-paced country music)

- [Man On Horse] Go get 'em sissy.

(dog barking)

(engine roaring)

- Morning sissy.

Morning Isum.

- [Isum] Morning Lou.

(engine roaring)

- Whoa!

(metal crashing)

- Morning Cottonmouth.

- [Cottonmouth] Morning Lou

(dog barking)

- Go get 'em Sissy.

Pull girl.

Pull it up for Woody.

(dog barking)

Hot dang girl.

Go get him.

(horse galloping)

(laughing)

You got him now.

Good girl.

That a girl.

Good girl Sissy.

Yeah.

- Isum, that hound of yours is a winner

if I ever did see one.

I tell ya that's a real hound you got there Isum.

- She's a good 'un alright.

Makes me real proud.

- Well, she's the fastest dog this side of Baton Rouge.

Hey come that big coon dog race,

me and you is gonna make nothing but pure money (laughs).

I got bets out all over this here parish.

- Old Sissy'll give 'em a good run for the money now.

You can bet on that.

- Oh, you want me to get some bets off you Isum?

- No, Cottonmouth you're the gambler in this family.

The prize money's good enough for me.

Did you know it's up to $400 this year?

- Whoo wee!

Now take good care of Sissy here.

Lot of good exercise and a lot of good dinner.

I got things to do.

As long as there are people coming in for the big coon race

the Harvest Moon's gonna be real busy.

See you at the bank, Isum (laughs).

(horn honking)

(car engine roaring)

- Come on girl, gotta get you home so I can go to work.

♫ But how can this be

♫ When I know he loves me

♫ My grandpappy said girl

♫ It's all in your head

♫ You know that you don't really love him

Hey Molly, is Isum gonna take you to the dance?

- He sure is.

If I can get him away from Sissy (laughs).

I tell you, all the years I've been going with that man,

I swear he spends more time with his hound

than he does with me.

- Oh Aunt Molly.

(boat engine roaring)

- Boudreaux's coming.

(birds chirping)

- Now you remember, Cottonmouth Gorch, one big crook.

You get $175, not one penny less.

Understand?

- Oui papa.

- How much I say again?

- $175, not one penny less.

- Knowing you'll get fat girl.

(door slams shut)

(guitar strumming)

- Whiskey.

Whiskey.

- That's your bill from last time.

It includes two broken chairs

and a set of store bought teeth for poor Harvey Colson.

- I say whiskey.

- Money.

(speaking in a foreign language)

- We come to deal with that Cottonmouth.

Not you.

Not you.

- Fine, fine.

As soon as your deal's all made

and your bill's all settled up,

you can drink yourselves blind.

Till then (speaking in a foreign language).

- We make trade.

- Well that's real nice Defalice.

- You women should not be so hard on a man, no?

- A man should not be so hard on the furniture.

Ah?

- Ah (laughing).

- Hey!

Hey, hey.

Hey, hey!

(man laughing)

- Please, I just sing and wait tables, that's all.

(woman screaming)

(man laughing)

- Now quit it.

- I'll pay you.

- I'd rather starve to death.

- You leave her alone you vermin.

- Oh no, no, enough, enough.

We be good.

We be good, come on.

(boat engine roaring)

- Get out of here Noah, quit it.

Let go.

Let go.

Let go Tuna!

You're the awfulish looking dog I ever did see.

Don't you do that Tuna, don't you do that.

Don't you do that Tuna.

(dog farting)

Oh!

I gotta get rid of that dog.

Whoo!

That's the righteous smell I ever smelled.

Whoo!

Oh my God!

If Tuna had been in the Civil War,

the south would have won it without firing a shot.

Hey!

(shouting)

- Hey Cottonmouth, we make deal huh?

- Always happy to see you boys smiling faces.

Although I know you boys drive a mean hard bargain.

I always end up on the short end of the stick.

Molly, set these boys up with a big stiff drink.

Maybe two or three of them on me.

- No, no, no.

We have enough.

No more until we make deal.

- There's just ain't no way of getting around you boys

is there?

Clearheaded, hard driving business, ain't cha?

Ya'll got a reputation all over Plaquin Parish.

Isn't that right Molly?

- They got a reputation alright.

- We got 10 gator, five otter, 10 coon.

Papa said $175, not one penny less.

- Minus the 50 you owe from last time.

- The boss said not one penny less.

- Boys what am I gonna do with ya?

I try to say yes but you won't let me.

I deal in honest good and faith and you insult me.

- Why no!

- Yes you did with your attitude.

You stood right there and said not one penny less

than $125.

Now, where's there room for me to make an honest living?

- 175.

- I got mouths to feed.

And that ugly little dog out there, he eats like a horse.

And you said not one penny less than 110,

now that's an insult.

- We got two more gators than the last time.

- Yeah, the last time you busted up my place

and run off all my business and cost me an arm and a leg

but am I complaining?

Am I holding it against you, no.

And you stand there and say not one penny less

than 110.

Now that's an insult.

- No, no!

(speaking in a foreign language)

110, not one penny less.

- Boys listen (mumbling) I don't know what to do.

You just got me so confused, I don't know what to do.

And I'm just gonna be so embarrassed

to show my place out in public

and that's a fact.

God!

My God!

(sighing loudly)

Alright, it's a deal.

And God bless your soul just 110.

God have mercy on you.

Molly, write 'em up a clip slip for $60

of whatever they want.

- Wait, the deal was 110.

- Yeah, minus the 50 you owe me.

- [Raymond] What 50?

- As far as I know when I met my betters

you boys have done seen me again.

The boondocks are done

but I'm not holding nothing against ya.

No!

Molly, give these boys a jug of my finest.

(men laughing)

(men laughing and slurring)

(slurring and laughing drowns out speaker)

- Papa!

Papa!

We got $60.

- [Defalice] Not more penny less.

(objects crashing loudly)

(men shouting and arguing loudly)

- Oh papa!

(water splashing)

- Dummy.

I get even with you Cottonmouth Gorch.

I get even with you.

(car engine sputtering)

(horse galloping)

(door slams shut)

- Yeah?

- Sheriff Isum Gorch?

- Isum Gorch.

- Morgan, treasury department.

- Well what's a T-man doing here in Plaquin Parish?

- Sheriff, there are a lot of things

going on in this parish that are questionable.

- Like what?

- Well, for one thing liquor's being manufactured

here illegally.

- Most likely.

- You mean you know about it?

- Not much goes on in this swamp I don't know about.

- Sheriff, there is a law called prohibition.

- Yes, heard of that too.

- There is organized disregard for the law

going on here and you're doing nothing about it?

- Well, I wouldn't say that.

But you know it's pretty hard to convince folks

they're doing something wrong when they've been doing

that same thing for over 100 years.

- Gorch!

You have been derelict in your duty.

- Now you hold on.

There ain't been nobody murdered since I been sheriff here

and nobody's been robbed.

(man laughs)

- You backwater hicks have a lot to learn

about federal agents.

We hit hard and we hit fast.

Surely my men and myself are gonna be at Johnson's Landing

with boats and fire power.

We're gonna sweep this swamp in one swell swoop.

(stuttering)

I'm gonna get those moonshiners Gorch.

(door slams shut)

(woman laughing)

- Sharlene!

- What?

- I'm almost finished here now just leave me alone a second.

- Why Jacob I ain't doing nothing but helping.

- [Isum] Hey Jacob!

Where's your pa?

- He's over at distill I think.

- You hightail it on over there

and tell him to get home, empty handed too.

We got some T-men in here a little hot under the collar.

And they got boats and guns and I don't want to get

nobody hurt.

- Alright.

- Sharlene, would you take care of my horse?

I'm gonna drive my official car over there

where them T-men are.

- Yes Isum, I sure will.

- Sharlene, cast off that line.

- Jacob, are you sure it's ready for this?

- This is an emergency.

- Yeah, but don't think your invention

should be tested first?

- When Orville and Wilbur were ready,

they didn't wait for nothing.

They just pish, took off.

See a man has to face his moment of destiny Sharlene.

Boy wait till my daddy sees me flying up in this boat.

(engine sputtering)

(man cheering)

Here we go!

(engine roaring)

(engine sputtering)

Something's wrong with this boat.

(engine backfiring)

It's turning all by itself.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh lord run.

(boat crashing loudly)

(man splashing in water)

(car engine sputtering)

(train whistle blowing in background)

(gun cocking)

(fly buzzing)

- Sheriff Gorch, I hope you appreciate the amount

of tax money being spent to clean up your mess.

- Well, it's gonna be real interesting

to finally see where all that tax money does go.

- [Roger] Here they come.

(boat engines roaring)

- [Man On Boat] The throttle is stuck!

- Cut it.

Cut it.

Cut it!

Cut the motor.

(engine drowns out speaker)

- Whoa!

- Cut it, cut it!

(man splashing in water)

(boat crashing loudly into car)

- Well I think you just spent some more of that tax money.

(pigs squealing)

(man sighing loudly)

- The heaven is a table.

(boat engine roaring)

- Pa!

Pa.

Pa, listen.

- Dammit it boy, it's high time you took an interest

in my business instead of messing around

with that fine (mumbling) boat.

- Pa listen, the revenuers are coming.

- Revenuers.

Hell, there ain't been no revenuers in this swamp

since Robert E. Lee surrendered.

- I'm telling you, Isum warned me the law is coming.

- Isum, Isum, always Isum.

When are you gonna spending some time with your real pa?

- I'm telling you they're coming in boats and got guns

and you're supposed to leave everything behind

and get back home.

- Hell I got a boat load of Louisiana's finest.

- Dammit pa, when are you gonna listen to me for once?

They got guns.

(boat engine roaring away)

(investigative music)

- Agent Morgan.

Do you see anything?

- No!

- There he is, over there.

There he is, over there!

(gun cocking)

- Stop!

Stop in the name of the law.

(engine revving)

(fast-paced bluegrass music)

Shoot!

Shoot!

Shoot!

(gun shot blasting)

(water splashing)

(motors roaring)

(gun shot blasting)

That's government property!

(man laughing and cheering)

If he can do it, I can do it.

(water splashing)

(boat crashing loudly)

- You T-men do it hard and fast alright (laughs).

(birds chirping)

That never happened before.

(woman laughing)

- After five years with each other,

maybe the excitement's worn off.

- Now don't talk like that Molly.

You know I got this mess with Cottonmouth

and them government men on my mind.

- Isum Gorch, you ain't never brought

your sheriff's problems to bed with us before.

No (humming).

I think it's just getting too used to me.

- Molly, quit talking like that.

- I will when you give me a reason to.

- A reason?

(door slams shut)

What better reason you got

than knowing how I feel about you?

- [Molly] Oh yeah?

Is that right?

Well, what have you ever done to prove that you love me?

- Prove it?

Who do I gotta prove it to?

- Everybody.

Including me.

Sheriff, you ever heard of marriage?

- Marriage?

- [Molly] Yeah.

- Well, what's that got to do with this?

- Everything!

(door slams shut)

- Do you think I'd feel any different about you

if we was married.

- You might respect me more.

Has it ever occurred to you that I might wanna have

a family some day?

Huh?

- You mean kids?

- Yeah.

- Oh no, I'm too old for that.

- You said it, I didn't.

- Now come on Molly, where ya going?

- That is up to you.

- Well now if it's up to me,

you'd just get right on back here.

- Mr. Gorch, you want me back here

to warm up your bed again?

- I sure do honey.

- Then get yourself a ring and a preacher.

- Now Molly, now you hold on.

(boat motor roaring)

- It's still there.

Let's get to work.

- Jacob, I feel just like a criminal.

Smashed up or not, this boat is still government property.

- You don't understand, I gotta have that engine.

- You could offer to buy it for junk value.

- With what?

- Pinning our future on Sissy winning that race

is downright dumb.

You're looking at a desperate man Sharlene.

- Boy, it'd sure be awful to go to jail.

Maybe we should put off getting married.

(slow, sentimental music)

(woman moaning softly)

- Still wanna put off getting married?

- Jacob.

I got such an itch.

- So do I.

But we promised ourselves we wouldn't until we got married.

And we can't get married until I sell my invention.

- Jacob.

Get that engine (laughs).

- Looks good Jacob.

Looks like you're getting close.

- Close?

I've done it this time Isum.

This boat is perfect.

She flies like the wind.

- When you get all of the bugs worked out of it,

I want my windmill back.

- Oh they're all worked out.

Watch this.

(engine starting)

(engine revving)

- Oh Jacob it's wonderful!

(engine sputtering and hissing)

- Oh Sharlene, jump.

(water splashing)

(explosion booming)

(water splashing)

Isum?

- Morning Jacob.

How's your pa?

- Oh he's still cooking mash as far as I know.

- He's so dang gone meat headed he's just gonna have

to learn the hard way.

- I guess.

Say Isum, I know I'm always coming to you for help

but this time I really need it.

- What's your problem?

- I need some investors.

- What are you saying Jacob?

You need money?

- All I need is $300.

- $300?

- I know it sounds like a whole lot but if it works,

the investors will make back 10 times that.

And then me and Sharlene could get married.

- Now Jacob, I can't promise you nothing.

But if Sissy can win this big coon race,

it just might be I could do a little investing myself.

- You could?

(man cheering and laughing)

- Isum, Jacob, looky here.

Old Sissy got her name in the paper.

Look, right there.

Bold as brass.

Some other hound been entered in the race too.

Name of Lord Byron.

- Lord Byron?

Say he's a champion.

- Is he fast?

- Fast?

He's won cups big enough to slop hogs in.

- He's coming in an airplane too.

Oh ain't that exciting?

Look, right there.

D. Wheeler's Lord Byron.

I wonder who D. Wheeler is.

- I don't know D. Wheeler but his dog's gonna be a problem.

- Wouldn't you God darn know it.

- Well Jacob, what's wrong?

- Lord Byron, that's what's wrong.

How in the world is Sissy gonna win a race

against a dog like that?

- Moonshine man's a fine old man.

(mumbling)

(pigs snorting)

(man laughing)

(pigs drown out speaker)

(upbeat, suspenseful music)

- I think you boys should leave them guns behind.

- Shh.

I give the orders here.

(water splashing)

Stay alert.

These moonshiners just as soon shoot you as look at you.

(suspenseful music)

(branch snapping loudly)

(pigs snorting)

(branch snapping loudly)

(pigs snorting)

(pig squealing)

(gun shot blasting)

(tree crashing loudly)

(machine gun shots blasting)

(gun shots drown out speaker)

(gun shots blasting)

- Stop shooting you damn fools.

(gun shots blasting)

I told you you didn't need them guns.

Good lord what have you done?

Looks like we got him.

Oh lordy, lordy, lordy.

(pig squealing)

(men shouting)

(man laughing)

I sure am glad you boys can't shoot straight.

(boat engine roaring)

(birds chirping)

- Hey listen, this is a high class joint.

Nobody allowed out front without a shirt on.

- I don't need none of that sass from you.

- The revenuers are coming.

- Thanks Willy, go get yourself a piece of candy.

- Sounds serious, want me to get Isum?

- Never seen a day I couldn't handle revenuers.

(footsteps clomping on dock)

- I believe this belongs to you Gorch.

- It looks like mine.

Smells like mine.

But you just can't be too sure can you?

- That's evidence of a felony.

- That ain't no felony.

That's a red plaid shirt

and I got it down at the general store

and you must be a little color blind.

- What's the government of the United (dog growling).

- Tuna, I'm gonna put you out of your misery.

Now what was that you were saying young fella?

- You know you swamp rats don't deserve law and order.

The government of the United States has your number Gorch.

And I'm gonna get you sooner or later.

- Did you say sooner?

- Yes, sooner.

- I think you have been called.

- Like I said I'm gonna get you Gorch

and the sooner the better.

- Run!

(dog farting loudly)

- Retreat (gagging).

Retreat for God sakes.

(water splashing)

- Morning sheriff, how's that hound of yours?

- Just fine thank you.

- Still as quick as ever?

- You bet.

Last time my runners come back without her (mumbling).

Morning Molly.

Say I've been thinking.

- I can't talk right now.

I've got work to do.

- I've been thinking about what you were saying.

We get along good you and me.

And, as for the other well,

we can't complain about that either.

So I've made up my mind.

I'm gonna marry you Molly.

- No you are not.

(slow, sentimental music)

- But I thought.

- That's the problem.

If you could ever just get what you think

and what you feel both together at the same time

in the same place you, nevermind.

Nevermind.

- Now listen woman, this is what you wanted.

- That is not what I wanted at all.

I got a bus ticket right there.

See, I'm leaving.

I'm leaving right after the race.

- Now hold on just hold on.

- That is what I want, right there, bus ticket.

- Until the day I die, I'll never understand you females.

You make the man's life a misery.

(woman gasps)

I think you all get together and plan it

when we're not looking.

(plane engine roaring)

Here comes that Lord Byron.

- Wait for me.

- Now Molly, my car won't run so I'm riding my horse

on over there.

You drive Cottonmouth's car and come on.

- Cottonmouth?

Darn!

I never could get that car started.

(plane engine roaring)

(people chattering loudly)

(horse galloping)

- Them engines, boy them's powerful engines.

- That sure is a classy way to travel.

- Howdy folks.

Don't push, don't shove now.

Everybody's gonna get a look at that age old soul

of hillbilly music.

The one and only personage you have waited

all your little lives to see.

The owner of Lord Byron and the queen of hillbilly music,

Miss Dusty Wheeler.

(exotic music)

- A woman.

Dusty Wheeler.

(upbeat, fanfare music)

- My, my, my, my, my.

This is gonna be easy pickens.

- Hell I ain't racing no woman.

- What are you talking about Isum?

You ain't racing no woman, you're racing a dog.

- Hey now.

How's everybody this afternoon?

- Miss Wheeler.

- Please call me Dusty.

- Sure Dusty.

- Miss Dusty we sure is happy to have you with us.

- Oh well thank you mister?

- Gorch, Cottonmouth Gorch.

And this here stringy looking fella is my cousin Isum.

He's our sheriff.

- Oh Isum Gorch?

You own Sissy.

- Yes ma'am I do.

- Well I've heard of you and that famous dog of yours

all the way up in Nashville.

- In Nashville?

- Uh-huh.

- Say, that's really something.

- Meet Lord Byron.

- Say, he is a fine dog.

- Let's go up here and get a picture.

Come on, let's go up here where we can find us a good spot.

Oh yeah, look here.

- Go on Isum.

- Oh look at this.

Let's do it right here in front of this sign.

Come here Dusty.

Oh, this is gonna be just terrific.

We gonna get us a fine photograph of the leading citizens

of this fairest community.

Now let's see.

My, what a handsome couple.

Oh excuse me sir.

No, I think we'll just have a picture of the rivals today.

Thank you.

- Friendly rivals I hope Mr. Gorch.

- Isum, just call me Isum.

- [Man In Plaid] One more please.

- Miss Dusty, you're coming with me to my place.

- Oh, you don't waste any time do you?

- Well I own the finest hotel in this here town,

far being what you're used to.

- Oh, with the warm hospitality of all you charming folks,

I know I'm going to feel right at home.

- Get out the car Molly.

- Well Isum, I think you and I have a lot in common

to talk about.

I hope Sissy isn't in heat.

You say you can't hold back a bitch in heat.

- Remember folks, Miss Dusty Wheeler's latest album

can be purchased on the blue dock label.

(people talking loudly)

- [Cottonmouth] Molly?

- Yes, yes?

- Where's stew?

- Coming (mumbling).

- Get out of here.

Get it lighted quick.

What you all gaping about?

What you gaping about?

She'll be right down.

Everybody come on, sit down.

- Howdy folks.

- That's her, that's her.

- Howdy.

Don't worry, we're coming right down.

Oh smell that country cooking.

Mmm hmm.

- My daddy always had coon dogs

but he always wanted a champion.

I guess I got the fever from him.

- Hold it right there.

Let's get a shot of this.

Wait a minute.

Sir, can you give us a little smile?

Thank you.

- Lucy (mumbling).

- Ah Miss Dusty, you and Isum come on.

You all come right on over here.

Miss Dusty.

We got hot biscuits coming right up.

Molly?

- [Dusty] Hot biscuits, I love 'em.

- Jacob, get out of them weeds.

Come on over here and sit down.

- Hey Mr. Smilin' Jack?

Can I ask you a question?

- Well sure, go ahead son.

- Well, what's it like flying behind two

of them continental radio engines?

- Well I tell you son, it's like riding on an eagle's back.

But you know what, that sucker will fly

with only one engine.

- No kidding.

- Oh yeah.

- Isum, I've been giving something a lot of thought.

- What's that?

- I wanna buy Sissy.

- Oh, no ma'am.

She ain't for sale.

- But think of it.

Sissy's pups sired by Lord Byron.

The start of a whole new champion line.

How about $500?

- $500?

That sure is a big pile of money.

- I want that dog.

And I usually get what I want.

(woman gasping)

- Oh, I am so sorry.

You eat hearty now.

Sheriff.

Whoops.

- Oh my, now honey, a little mashed potatoes

never hurt anybody.

- Ah Miss Dusty, this is where we're gonna have

the big dance tomorrow night.

- Well don't you usually have the party after the race?

- In Soggy Bottom we always celebrate before the race

whilst everybody's still on speaking terms.

(woman laughing)

Ah Miss Dusty, Sharlene is surely gonna be singing one

of her own songs she write herself.

And she's gonna give you her reminintion of it.

- Oh, that's sweet.

- I sure feel funny up here

in front of Miss Dusty.

(people clapping and cheering)

Well I guess I better just sing and get it over with.

(guitar strumming)

♫ One of these days when dreams have their way

♫ We will be dreaming together

♫ We'll find a way

♫ One of these days

♫ Over and over a dream is forever

♫ One of these nights

♫ Follow the light

♫ To shine in my window to guide you

♫ Follow the light

♫ One of these nights

♫ Follow your dreams and you'll see they will find you

♫ One of these dreams will find you

♫ One of these schemes will bring you hope

♫ Some of these dreams are bound to

♫ One of these dreams is coming home true

♫ One of these days when it's going our way

♫ We will be dreamers forever

♫ A reason to pray

♫ Is one of these days

♫ Our dreaming and scheming will be always

(dog growling)

(wood scraping)

- Make room for the greens.

♫ One of these dreams will find you

(dog whimpering)

♫ One of these schemes will bring you hope

(woman screaming and body loudly hitting floor)

(woman laughing)

- I'm sorry this went and happened Miss Dusty.

(woman laughing)

- Oh that Lord Byron has got a temper on him.

- What's the matter Sharlene?

- Oh Jacob, it was terrible.

- No.

- Missy, that sure was one fine song you were singing.

- Really?

- Yes ma'am.

You see talent's my business and honey,

you got a bucket full.

- Oh I sure do thank you.

- Yes siree.

- I tell you what, how'd you like to sell me that song

for this here nice crisp $20 bill.

- Jacob, $20!

- Whoo!

- How would you like to go over to my house and see my dog?

- Why I'd love to see your dog.

- Well come on.

(woman giggling)

- Oh looky here, it's raining.

- Oh my goodness.

- Let's find something.

How about this?

Put this on.

(woman giggling)

(rain drops splashing)

(guitar strumming and woman humming)

- And who exactly are you?

- I'm nobody.

Is Isum home?

- You missed him honey.

- Have you,

have you,

have you been inside?

- Mmm hmm.

All it needs is a woman's touch.

- Have you got any idea what this race means to Isum?

- Well just about the same as it means to me.

- I don't think anything means anything to you.

You're just buying and selling.

What right have you got to barging in here

and taking things away from people.

- Listen honey, I don't take anything

that isn't honestly won or freely given.

- Isum didn't have much in this world

but he did have Sissy and this race

and the prize money before you come along.

- Well honey, you talk like you live in this house.

- You call me honey one more time and I'll stomp you.

I'll fight you for that man.

You hear me?

Yeah, I'm telling you, I'll fight you tooth and nail.

Tooth and nail.

- [Child] One.

Two.

(men chattering)

Three.

(scheming music)

- Where is that horse you want to show me?

Well here is the second fastest coon dog

in the country.

Boy, isn't she a beauty?

- Morning.

- Second to none, this here dog

is gonna make me a lot of money.

- [Dusty] Well I hate to be the one to say it

but she'll never beat Lord Byron.

- Well maybe she won't but then again maybe she will.

- [Clerk] Isum?

- What?

- [Clerk] That mail order come in.

- Oh excuse me Miss Dusty.

- I'm gonna say that Sissy is the fastest dog

and I'm taking all bets.

I'm saying that Lord Byron is gonna lose.

(people chattering loudly)

- [Dusty] How about you Isum?

You interested in a bet with me?

- Um no ma'am, I ain't much of a betting man.

- Um Miss Dusty, what was that you were saying?

What was that you had in mind?

- Isum's dog wins, he gets Lord Byron.

My dog wins, I get Sissy.

(crowd chattering)

- No, no thanks.

- Well why not, don't you think Sissy's a winner.

- Well I don't think it's right betting Sissy.

- Okay, I'll sweeten the pot for you.

I'll bet Lord Byron and $500

and you don't have to put down a penny, just Sissy.

(crowd cheering)

- Isum, Isum.

Me and you is gonna be rich.

Sissy ain't never lost a race.

- Well it don't feel right.

- What are you talking about Isum?

$500?

You ain't gonna let no woman show you up.

- What about the honor of Soggy Bottom?

All these fine people here waiting for you to stand up

for them, isn't that right?

(crowd cheering)

- Isum, we need the money.

(crowd talking loudly in background)

- Alright, it's a bet.

(crowd cheering and chattering)

- You gentlemen want something?

- Strong safe (laughs).

Good bank.

(country dance music)

- Lemonade.

Embarrassing me to be at my own party.

- Cottonmouth, have you seen Jacob yet tonight?

- I expect he went to another party

where he could find something stronger than lemonade.

(country dance music)

- Raw juice.

- Sergeant.

- Lemonade.

- Now I'm giving you this, I ain't selling you nothing.

By the way, I wanna thank for the donations.

(mumbling)

- Whoa holy.

We can give real party tonight, huh?

- May not think so clearheaded tomorrow.

(both laughing)

- Jacob, where've you been?

- I had some business to attend to.

Well, look at all this food.

How about filling me a plate?

- You wanna dance first?

(country dance music)

(crowd clapping)

- And now, and now you fine folks of uh (stuttering)

Soggy Bottom.

You're in for a real special treat.

Here tonight for the first time tonight

anywhere in the world Miss Dusty Wheeler

will perform for you her very next huge smash recording hit.

This song will soon be available on the blue dock label

throughout the nation.

You heard it first right here.

Now here she is, Miss Dusty Wheeler.

(crowd cheering and clapping)

- Oh thank you ladies and gentlemen,

I really appreciate that.

The song that I'm gonna sing for you tonight

is called One of These Dreams.

(crowd cheering and clapping)

And I want you to know that it was written

by your very own Sharlene Foyet.

(crowd cheering and clapping)

- [Smilin Jack] Alright.

♫ One of these days when dreams have their way

♫ We will be dreaming together

♫ We'll find a way

♫ One of these days

♫ Over and over a dream is forever

♫ One of these nights

♫ Follow the light

♫ Shine in my window to guide you

♫ Follow the light

♫ One of these nights

♫ Follow your dreams and you'll see they will find you

♫ One of these dreams will find you

♫ One of these schemes will bring you home

♫ One of these dreams are bound to

♫ One of these dreams is coming home too

♫ One of these dreams is coming home too

(crowd cheering and clapping)

- Ya'll gonna be rich, rich.

- Well how do you mean?

- Why you write a song like that, you get royalties.

- [Sharlene] Royalties?

- Sure, with a famous thing like Miss Dusty

singing that there song,

why it's worth thousands.

- Thousands?

- Whoo!

- Boy marry this girl right quick.

- Well that Smilin' Jack didn't say nothing

about no royalties.

- What kind of deal did you make?

- [Jacob] $20.

- Did you sign something?

- Just this.

- $20, no royalties.

You don't even get your name on it.

- Papi, at the time it seemed like it was--

- You would've made enough money

to get your both self married.

Instead of that, you chucked it right out the window.

- You P-men?

- T-Men.

- You look for whisky?

- Maybe.

- That Cottonmouth Gorch, he fool you.

You think you break up his still,

no he have many more.

- Where are they?

- Oh, you have to give me a little something, huh?

You have boat?

- [Morgan] We can rent one.

- [Boudreaux] You know alligator bayou?

- [Morgan] We can find it pal.

- You cross alligator bayou to Turtle Rock.

- Then what?

- Ah.

You go around Turtle Rock to Chigger Cover.

You know Chigger Cove?

- Yup.

- And that there too.

But then you go to.

- Honey, we haven't danced like this since last year.

You forget how much fun.

- Oh yeah.

Yeah, it's a darn shame I'm leaving after the race tomorrow.

- I've got a real respect for you Molly.

I always have been.

- Yes.

- So I won't fight it anymore.

If you have to go then you have to go.

- I do.

I mean, I do.

Yes, I certainly do.

My mind is made up.

- We've had a lot of good times together Molly.

- Yeah.

- Some of the best I've ever known.

- Oh yeah.

- So as your friend, I won't stand in your way.

- Thanks.

(crowd cheering and clapping)

- Come on Mr. Tall, Strong and Silent,

show this city girl how to do that dance.

You will excuse us won't you?

(country dance music)

(people chattering loudly)

- That lemonade boat's getting mighty popular.

How would you like to have something to eat Miss Dusty?

- Oh, I'd love something to eat.

- Well, come on.

- You know man, these backwater hicks are an ignorant lot

but I'll say one thing for 'em.

They sure have a way with lemonade.

- Howdy Mr. T-Man.

- Hi pal.

- You still here?

- In the future I will address you as prisoner Gorch.

I'm very close to some hard evidence.

- Do tell.

- Enjoy yourself tonight Gorch

because tomorrow I'm gonna put you away for 20 years.

- 20 years.

May you can get a little stiffer in Georgia 20 years.

Have some more lemonade Mr. T-Man (laughing).

Alright, get some money down (mumbling).

Come here.

Come here.

Alright there, come on, start the race.

Come on cocky.

(foot squishing bug loudly)

- Keep up, I win.

- Oh (speaking in a foreign language).

I'm so sorry.

- Sorry to get even (mumbling).

- It was a mistake.

- So is this.

(fist whacking)

(man grunting)

(woman screaming)

(man laughing)

(fist whacking loudly)

(men laughing and yelling)

(fists whacking loudly)

(glass shattering)

(people yelling)

(glass shattering)

- Hey, where are ya'll going?

- Here you go.

(object crashing loudly)

(glass shattering)

- Oh Jacob, not again this year.

- Stay out of this, I don't want you getting hurt.

Yeehee!

I thought I told you to stay out of this.

(object crashing loudly)

(glass shattering)

- The boys is acting a little frisky tonight (laughs).

- Oh is that what you call it?

- Miss Dusty, I think it's time for us to call it a night.

- Oh she'll be just fine right here.

- Uh-huh.

Well, I think I'll retire.

Good night all.

Excuse me gentlemen, good night.

(glass shattering)

Good night.

Good night everybody, good night.

(glass shattering)

- Miss Molly, do you wanna dance with me?

- Sure.

(fist whacking loudly)

(people yelling)

- You know I really gotta get the recipe for this stuff.

- Excuse me Miss Dusty.

What?

Hold it!

(music stops abruptly)

Now all of the women go over to the sideline

and the children go upstairs on the balcony

where it's safe.

Gentlemen, it is my duty to inform you

that you're all under arrest for public drunkenness

and disorderly conduct.

Now in 20 minutes, I want all of you to meet me

over at the jailhouse.

Now you can all go on with your festivities.

(fast-paced country music)

(people shouting and fists whacking loudly)

(body crashing)

- Alright gang, let's get him.

- To the department.

- And to Franklin (glass shattering).

- Delano (glass shattering).

- And Eleanor (glass shattering).

- Miss Molly, sheriff's already got a girl.

Come on dance with me.

(fist whacking loudly)

- That is my man.

- Miss Dusty may I escort you back to your room.

Something's happened I gotta take care of.

- Thank you for a wonderful evening.

- You're welcome.

- Well Miss Molly, what a charming hair do (laughs).

(glass shattering)

(horse whinnying)

(dog whimpering)

- Cottonmouth, do you ever have a hangover?

- Hell, I had them when they first come out.

- Morning old girl.

I hope you got a decent night sleep.

Alright, everybody outside.

Sissy's got a coon hunt to go to.

(people cheering)

(men snoring)

(horses whinnying and dogs barking)

- Why Miss Dusty, I surely hope this ain't gonna be

too rough on you and that milky white skin of yours.

- Well honey, aren't you waiting tables today?

- Isum, have you seen Jacob anywhere?

- No.

- Sheriff!

Sheriff, somebody stole our airplane engine.

- Your what?

- The whole engine of the whole damn airplane.

- Well when we're finished we'll have a look.

It's kind of hard to hide one of them airplane engines

here in the Soggy Bottom.

- I'd better go find him.

- Yeah, you better.

Hurry up.

Come on Sissy.

(dogs barking)

You done me mighty proud for a lot of years.

You just gotta win one more race.

Come on girl.

Show 'em who they've gotta kiss today.

- You seen Jacob?

- Ain't seen him.

Never could keep track of that boy.

- I can't find him anyplace.

(upbeat, country music)

(dogs barking)

- Ladies and gents.

This here's a down home coon hunt.

(crowd cheering and clapping)

The coon's got a good head start.

The first dog to tree him, wins.

(dogs barking)

In order to find out which dog does the treeing,

owners and judges ride along.

There's no planned course.

Where that coon goes, the dogs got to follow.

This here's Judge Placid Mouthamush.

He's come 42 miles to judge today's race.

- Well, hi.

(crowd cheering)

- Howdy ho.

- Now, hounds and owners, on your mark.

(dogs barking)

Get set.

(gun shots blasting)

(crowd cheering)

(horses galloping)

(fast-paced, country music)

(dogs barking)

(crowd shouting)

(fast-paced, country music)

(dogs barking)

(people shouting and cheering)

(dogs barking)

(fast-paced country music)

- Is there anything you don't do well?

- No.

(fast-paced country music)

(people shouting and cheering)

(dogs barking)

(man grunting)

- Did you make the wrong turn?

- This whole stinking swamp is nothing but mud.

- That ain't.

That's quicksand (laughs).

(man groaning)

(man cheering and laughing)

(fast-paced country music)

(dogs barking)

(horse whinnying)

(water splashing)

(woman screaming)

- Grab hold of the stirrup.

Hang on to his tail.

(woman crying)

There you go, alright.

- Oh thank you.

- Anytime.

(fast-paced country music)

(dogs barking)

- Go get 'em Sissy.

Go get 'em girl.

(dogs barking)

(mischievous music)

(dogs barking)

(fast-paced country music)

(dogs barking)

(dog whimpering)

(dogs barking)

It's alright girl.

Everything's gonna be alright.

- Lord Byron won, look at that.

Lord Byron's still the champ.

(dogs barking)

- It's alright girl, it's gonna be alright.

You take it easy now.

It's all over.

- Is she alright?

- I think she busted a leg.

- This isn't the way I wanted it to finish at all.

- Take it easy girl.

Ain't nobody's fault except mine.

- Poor Sissy.

- Sorry you lost your bets Cottonmouth.

- Oh it's only money.

Isum, are you alright?

- Yeah, I'm alright.

Cottonmouth, can I get you to help me put Sissy

in George's wagon.

- Sure cousin.

Excuse me Molly.

(slow, sentimental music)

- George, would you carry Sissy over to my place

and take care of her until I get back please sir?

- [George] Yes sir.

(explosion booming)

- What in the blue blazes is that?

(people chattering)

- Good God almighty.

Take Lord Byron back to the hotel,

buy him a T-bone steak and charge it to Cottonmouth.

(dogs barking)

(horses galloping)

(men yelling and laughing)

(horse galloping)

- I hope you boys ain't doing what I think you're doing.

- You be a good boy sheriff, huh.

You go away.

- Isum, what's going on?

- It's alright.

- Everybody, back.

Back everybody.

Now we make getaway.

Get money.

- My bank!

What happened to my bank?

- Nobody follow.

Nobody follow, make sure nobody follow.

You too.

Get in truck.

In truck.

In truck.

You know me Isum.

(gun shot blasting)

(people screaming)

- Better do what he says.

It'll be alright.

- Move, move!

- We go now.

(car engine roaring)

(man laughing)

- Isum, halt.

What's happened?

- The Boudreaux's.

And my guess is they're headed for the Ferry Crossing.

Cottonmouth, you tail 'em.

- With what?

- With that car over there in my office.

I'll get my boat and try to beat them over there.

Come on, let's go.

- Wait for me.

They got my nest egg.

- You mean they got your meal ticket.

(car doors slamming)

(car engine backfiring)

- Who's making all that noise?

That's him, that's Gorch and he's stealing my car.

Gorch stop!

You're under arrest.

Commandeer that motorcycle.

- Whoa, whoa!

(tires squealing)

I'm commandeering that motorcycle.

Stand aside.

- Hey, that's government property.

- We are the government.

- Follow that car!

(engine sputtering)

Something wrong Roger?

- Well you see sir, I've never actually driven

one of these before.

- Move it!

- Yes sir.

(engine sputtering)

Whoa!

- [Morgan] Roger!

Roger!

- Hey Leroy.

You take care of my horse please.

Quick Jacob, give me the gator gun.

Fire up my boat, there's been a robbery.

- A robbery?

- Yeah, they took the women as hostages.

- Who?

- The Boudreaux's.

They're headed for the Ferry Crossing.

Now come on.

- Uh, Isum, your boat ain't gonna run.

I took your gas.

- You what?

- Now don't get mad Isum.

We can take my boat.

I just tried it out and it works real good.

- Now look Jacob, this ain't no time for foolishness.

- Trust me Isum.

Come on, just trust me.

- Jacob, you and me is gonna have a little talk

about that engine.

But for right now if you wanna see Sharlene again,

we best get going.

- Sharlene?

Untie us.

(engine roaring)

Hang on!

Trust me Isum.

(upbeat, chase music)

- He drives about as good as you rob banks.

- You beg.

Beg!

(music drowns out speaker)

(tires squealing)

- Hot shot.

You really slipped it to them kids on that song contract

of yours.

- Well, I'm a good business man.

- You're a hustler.

- Say, you think you could slow down just a little bit.

- We gotta catch 'em ain't we?

- [Smilin' Jack] Help!

(man laughing)

- What's it worth to ya?

- Help!

(man laughing)

Help!

- I tell ya what I'll do.

I'll stop the car if you give me (yelling)

that contract.

- Like hell I will.

- Well, hang on then.

(engine revving)

(man laughing)

- Roger, move it!

- Yes sir.

- I promise you can catch him.

- I can't very well (engine drowns out speaker).

(engine roaring)

(man laughing)

- Keep your hands on the wheel.

Oh my God, keep your hands on the wheel.

(man screaming)

(engine roaring)

- More faster.

(men laughing)

More faster.

(men laughing)

More faster.

- We got 'em.

(gun shot blasting)

(metal crashing)

We don't got 'em.

- Look, why don't we just let the sheriff

head 'em off at the crossing?

(fast-paced chase music)

- No one escapes from the U.S. Government.

(gun shots blasting)

- Jeez jumping jackfish, what's that?

(gun shots blasting)

(men yelling)

(gun shots blasting)

God almighty.

(gun shots blasting)

We got ourselves between a rock and a hard place.

- Oh heavenly father, I do repent my sins.

I've cheated my fellow man, I've practiced self abuse.

- What the hell are you talking about?

(gun shots blasting)

(tires squealing)

- Faster, more faster.

- More papa.

(fast-paced chase music)

- I see truck.

(gun shots blasting)

(gun cocking)

(gun shots blasting)

- Who the hell are they?

- Who cares, they're shooting at us.

- I think I'm gonna be sick.

(gun shots blasting)

(water spraying)

- That's malt.

And malt means beer.

Arrest that truck.

(gun shots blasting)

(woman screaming)

- Faster!

(gun shots blasting)

(engine sputtering)

- Now I want them all.

(boat engine roaring)

- Piney, get that thing out of here.

- I ain't scheduled to go yet Isum.

- [Isum] I got an emergency.

(bell ringing)

(upbeat, chase music)

(car crashing loudly)

(people yelling and screaming)

(water splashing)

(women screaming)

(men cackling)

- Papa.

Papa.

Papa, we flew.

We flew papa.

- I didn't want to fly.

(upbeat, chase music)

(both screaming)

(tires squealing)

(water splashing)

- I've been saved!

- You've been baptized.

Can you swim?

- No.

(water splashing)

(music drowns out speaker)

- Hang on.

- Cottonmouth, get that boat and borrow it.

- What's borrowing?

Come on in here.

Come on.

(engine roaring)

(metal clanging)

(men screaming)

(water splashing)

- Roger.

Do something.

- Yes sir.

- Captain.

Captain.

Where captain?

- No captain papa.

- Why no captain?

- Boats.

- Where boats?

- Flat tire.

- Put 'em in boats.

- Come on, move.

- Put 'em in boats.

- Hey there, we're on the way.

(boat engines roaring)

Cottonmouth, this boat won't start.

Take after 'em.

(man yelling)

(boat engine roaring loudly)

(boat engines roaring)

(man yelling)

(wood crashing)

(boat engines roaring)

- The engine, cut the engine.

(boat crashing and water splashing)

(boat engines roaring)

- [Isum] I'll get Molly.

You get Miss Dusty and Sharlene.

- Alright!

(boat engines roaring)

(gun shot blasting)

- Oh gosh.

(train whistle blowing)

(water splashing)

(train chugging and hissing)

- [Cottonmouth] I outta get you back Boudreaux.

But I won't.

(boat engines roaring)

(man laughing)

(man screaming)

(man laughing)

- I gone hooked all the gators.

(man laughing)

(boat engines roaring)

(gun shots blasting)

(train whistle blowing)

(train chugging)

(train whistle blowing)

- Look at bridge.

Look at bridge!

Too low for them (laughs).

We are safe now (laughs).

- Hang on (cheering).

(boat engine roaring)

(water splashing)

- [Isum] Take 'em out Cottonmouth.

- Are you talking Isum?

I'll get 'em.

Whoowee!

(upbeat country dance music)

(people clapping and cheering)

- Come on.

Get up here.

Now ladies and gentlemen.

- Gorch.

Robbing a bank is a federal offense, my jurisdiction.

Commandeer that wagon.

- Uh Mr. T-man, it's been smart to have zogged you.

- Gorch.

(man growls)

(people chattering and laughing)

Something wrong Roger?

- Well actually sir, I've never driven one of these before.

- Move it.

And hurry it along, giddy up.

(upbeat, country dance music)

(people laughing and clapping)

- Isum, that boy's boat was most remarkable thing

I ever saw in my life.

I mean, it was fantastic.

- I'm wondering what you'd think if I told you

he stole the motor off your plane to power that thing with.

- He what?

- That's what he done.

- Ah, now I'll take care of this.

Miss Dusty, please.

Now, Mr. Gorch, about the air boat thing-a-ma-bob

that you invented.

Why, even with a stolen engine,

it's still quite a remarkable machine.

Would you consider some developmental capital?

- Some what?

- Money.

Now Mr. Gorch,

would you like to step over here to my office.

- I takes care of all the business.

- Well, alright.

- Isum.

- Excuse me Miss Dusty.

Hey, where are you going?

- Oh, well I just figured I'd just move on.

Leave you and Miss Dusty to it.

- To what?

- To each other.

Well, good luck.

- Now wait just a minute.

I don't need any.

I got all the luck I can take care of.

- Oh, oh.

Oh (laughing).

- Hey!

What are you doing with my man?

- Listen Miss Dusty, you already won the race.

Ain't that enough?

- Not quite.

There's still the business of that bet.

- That bet?

- Yes Molly.

I'm afraid Sissy's hers.

- Hers?

- Honey.

I got eyes in my head.

Taking Sissy away from you would be as criminal

as robbing that bank.

You stud her with Lord Byron

and give me the pick of the litter

and we'll call it even.

- Much obliged Miss Dusty.

I sure do like the way you do business.

- Miss Dusty, I'm sorry.

I had you figured all wrong.

- No you didn't.

(both laughing)

(wedding march playing)

- Dear friends, we bring together today these two couples

for the purpose of holy matrimony.

Now if there is anyone here present

who knows any reason why these men and these women

should not be joined in holy wedlock,

let him speak now or forever hold his (drum roll beating).

(dog farting)

(boards crashing loudly)

♫ Down along the bayous down in Louisiana

♫ Spanish moss hanging from the cypress leaves

♫ Little piece of heaven nestled in the swampland

♫ Soggy Bottom Louisiana hidden in the trees

♫ Cottonmouths and alligators chasing down a dinner

♫ It's the chasing-ist place that you ever did see

♫ Soggy Bottom citizens chasing down a dream or two

♫ Hound dog chase a coon and run him up a tree

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna try and tree a coon

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna get away

♫ Look out for Sooner cause he's gonna hang a mooner

♫ Gotta get moving better get out my way

♫ Revenuers hanging 'round a moonshiners hollar

♫ Moonshiners gotta make a move if he can

♫ Everybody's running from the skeeters and the chiggers

♫ Moonshiner running from the revenuer man

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna catch a moonshiner

♫ Run dammit run if you gonna get away

♫ Look out for Sooner cause he's gonna hang a mooner

♫ Gotta get moving better get out my way

♫ Cottonmouths and alligators chasing down a dinner

♫ It's the chasing-ist place that you ever did see

♫ Soggy Bottom citizens chasing down a dream or two

♫ Hound dog chase a coon and run him up a tree