Original subtitles

[bright music]

[bright music]

- Okay, am I saying mints as in mint

- Okay, am I saying mints as in mint

or mince as in the meat?

or mince as in the meat?

Mince?

Mince?

- Mince as in the meat. - Yes!

- Mints.

- Mince as in the meat?

- Mince as in the meat?

- No, wrong.

Mints as in the mint.

- Ugh, good game, good game. - Yeah.

- Ugh, good game, good game. - Yeah.

I've got one.

Am I saying courier,

as in the delivery driver,

as in the delivery driver,

or as in the country?

- Well, that doesn't work

because they're two very different words.

- Courier.

- Courier, as in the delivery driver.

- Wrong. I was saying Courier as in the country.

- Wrong. I was saying Courier as in the country.

- Then you're saying Korea wrong.

- Then you're saying Korea wrong.

- Okay, I've got another one.

Rose is intense.

Rose is intense.

- I don't wanna play this game anymore.

- Am I saying Rose is a little bit too full on sometimes

- Am I saying Rose is a little bit too full on sometimes

or Rose is camping in tents?

or Rose is camping in tents?

- Camping in tents.

- Yeah.

- What about this one?

- What about this one?

Laura is bitumen.

- What's bitumen?

- It's either the stuff you put on roads

- It's either the stuff you put on roads

or a b-tch human.

- B-tch human?

- B-tch human?

- Yeah.

- Nice, nice.

- Nice, nice.

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny ♪

♪ Funny ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

♪ Tonight, tonight ♪

♪ Put your hands up ♪

♪ Put your hands up ♪

♪ Let me hear you shout ♪

♪ To the rest of your life ♪

♪ To the rest of your life ♪

♪ Tonight, tonight ♪

♪ Put your hands up ♪

♪ Put your hands up ♪

♪ To the rest of your life ♪

♪ To the rest of your life ♪

- All right.

So our subject today

is Tracy. - Uh-huh.

- She's 30, single and hasn't been on a date in two years.

- She's 30, single and hasn't been on a date in two years.

[all exclaiming]

[all exclaiming]

- You know what, it sounds like someone needs

to stop treating dating like it's the dentist.

to stop treating dating like it's the dentist.

[all laughing]

- Well, get ready Tracy 'cause here come-

- [All] The Gay Squad!

- [All] The Gay Squad!

[all cheering]

[doorbell rings]

[doorbell rings]

- [All] Gay Squad to the rescue!

- Yes!

- Yes!

Oh my God! Sack tap!

[Tracy laughing]

[Tracy laughing]

Oh my gosh!

This is gonna be the best day ever.

I'm such a [Beeping] fag hag.

I'm such a [Beeping] fag hag.

[Tracy chuckling]

Oh my God. When are we going shopping, queens?

Oh my God. When are we going shopping, queens?

[Tracy chuckling]

[men laughing]

[men laughing]

- Well, we bought you some incredible new looks to try on.

All right, Tracy.

Let's find you a dress that'll drive any man wild.

Let's find you a dress that'll drive any man wild.

- I've never had a sister to try on clothes with before.

- I've never had a sister to try on clothes with before.

- Okay. Well, if you want a sister,

- Okay. Well, if you want a sister,

you can ask your parents to make you one.

- Oh, you are one sassy queen!

- Oh, you are one sassy queen!

Gay men are so sassy.

[Tracy laughing]

- Okay.

- Okay.

Um. Let's just try this on behind the changing screen.

- Why would I do that? You don't even like boobs!

- Why would I do that? You don't even like boobs!

[Tracy giggling]

[Tracy giggling]

[hand slapping]

I actually kissed a girl when I was drunk once

I actually kissed a girl when I was drunk once

and I used to date a guy with like,

and I used to date a guy with like,

practically no chest here at all,

so I'm basically full lez now.

[Tracy chuckling]

[Tracy chuckling]

[upbeat music]

- Now that Cameron's got your outfit sorted,

- Now that Cameron's got your outfit sorted,

I'm gonna be teaching you a thing or two

to get things heating up in the kitchen.

to get things heating up in the kitchen.

- Oh, can't we just gossip babes?

Gossip with me, girl!

Gossip with me, girl!

Gaga, yaaas!

Oh my gosh, what's the tea?

Oh my gosh, what's the tea?

- Where are you learning these words?

- Oh, I love Ral Pal's Drag Queen Race.

- Oh, I love Ral Pal's Drag Queen Race.

I'm basically a gay man trapped in a woman's body.

I'm basically a gay man trapped in a woman's body.

- Well, I know how that feels

'cause I'm basically a gay man trapped in a woman's house.

'cause I'm basically a gay man trapped in a woman's house.

[upbeat music]

- Okay, so Tracy.

- Okay, so Tracy.

My job is to get to know the real you.

My job is to get to know the real you.

So, what I wanna know is what, what,

what are you struggling with?

what are you struggling with?

- Wow. That's so nice of you to ask.

I guess,

I guess,

I, um, I try really hard to be confident

I, um, I try really hard to be confident

and really loud and stuff

and

and

I think the truth of it is, is that,

I think the truth of it is, is that,

I just wanna fit in, you know?

- Get it, yeah.

- Get it, yeah.

- And sometimes I think life would just be so much easier

- And sometimes I think life would just be so much easier

if I was just a gay, like you.

if I was just a gay, like you.

Like, you queers can have sex with anyone, no judgment

Like, you queers can have sex with anyone, no judgment

and you can't even get pregnant

so you don't need connies.

so you don't need connies.

Oh, why can't I just be a gaybo.

- Okay, Tracy!

- Okay, Tracy!

What you're saying,

it's actually kind of really quite homophobic.

- Lol, you little b-tch.

- Lol, you little b-tch.

Oh my God, I am not a homophobe.

I have a gay cousin.

I have a gay cousin.

Oh, actually, he might be vegan.

Oh, actually, he might be vegan.

[Tye sighing]

[horn honking]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- All right. Time for the reveal.

Are you ready for your date, Tracy?

Are you ready for your date, Tracy?

[inspiring music]

[inspiring music]

[men toasting]

[inspirational music]

[inspirational music]

- You faggots kitted me out!

- You faggots kitted me out!

I am feeling HIV positive

I am feeling HIV positive

that tonight is gonna be nothing short of amazing!

that tonight is gonna be nothing short of amazing!

Yaaas, Gaga!

Ooh!

Ooh!

- One final touch.

[tape ripping]

[fingers clicking]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- Perfect. - I love it.

- Our best work.

- Our best work.

[Tracy mumbling]

- Ooh, ooh!

- Ooh, ooh!

Ooh, ooh!

Yaaas, queen!

[Tracy mumbling]

[Tracy mumbling]

[upbeat techno music]

- Yeah, I don't understand why people get so up in arms

- Yeah, I don't understand why people get so up in arms

about unisex toilets.

It's a win-win for everyone, you know.

It's a win-win for everyone, you know.

- Yeah. - It's all inclusive

and there's no line outside the female bathroom.

and there's no line outside the female bathroom.

[woman chuckling]

[woman chuckling]

[urine running]

Yeah, I could get used to this.

Yeah, I could get used to this.

- Yeah, I, I'll see you in a bit.

- Yeah.

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

[audience applauding]

[audience applauding]

- Well, is there anything better than books

and a champagne breakfast?

and a champagne breakfast?

[everyone laughing]

- Nothing.

- Thank you everyone for coming along

- Thank you everyone for coming along

to the launch of my new book.

Now, I wanna tell you a little story.

Now, I wanna tell you a little story.

About a year ago, my girlfriends and I,

About a year ago, my girlfriends and I,

we were out on the town

and we decided we needed something to eat

and we decided we needed something to eat

and what is better than burgers?

Am I right?

Am I right?

[everyone agreeing]

So we headed to a certain fast food joint

and as I was standing in line waiting to order,

and as I was standing in line waiting to order,

I looked around me and I saw,

I looked around me and I saw,

[woman exhaling]

sorry.

sorry.

I saw people eating burgers.

So many burgers.

So many burgers.

It was at that moment,

right after I'd finished eating my burger

right after I'd finished eating my burger

that I knew a change had to happen.

that I knew a change had to happen.

And that change,

And that change,

that had to start with me.

I had to start thinking about going vegan.

I had to start thinking about going vegan.

[audience applauding]

[audience applauding]

- She is so brave.

- She is so brave.

- I don't know how she does it.

- I want this book to say to you,

- I want this book to say to you,

"Hey, you too can think about going vegan."

"Hey, you too can think about going vegan."

Imagine a world where the entire human race

Imagine a world where the entire human race

was thinking about maybe going vegan one day.

was thinking about maybe going vegan one day.

What a beautiful world that would be.

What a beautiful world that would be.

So buy this book today

and you too, can think about going vegan.

and you too, can think about going vegan.

[audience applauding]

[audience applauding]

You're welcome.

Please enjoy your complimentary breakfast.

- Oh, God. She is so inspiring.

- Oh, God. She is so inspiring.

- I can't wait to start thinking about going vegan.

- So good. - Mm!

- So good. - Mm!

[upbeat techno music]

[bright music]

[bright music]

- Man!

- Man!

- I find the show "Extras" pretty offensive

- I find the show "Extras" pretty offensive

because A,

we're actually called background artists

we're actually called background artists

and B, they always portray us as these annoying weirdos

and B, they always portray us as these annoying weirdos

which I find very factually inaccurate.

- Oh.

- Oh.

I bet.

- Mm. So how long have you been a background artist for?

- Mm. So how long have you been a background artist for?

- Oh, I'm,

I, I'm not one.

I, I'm not one.

I, I'm in the show.

- Oh, so you weren't just standing in there?

- Oh, so you weren't just standing in there?

- No.

- And the cameras were rolling?

- Yep.

- Yep.

- And this is all gonna be on TV?

- That's how it works, yeah.

- Oh, crazy.

- Oh, crazy.

So how'd you get the role?

- I auditioned, I guess.

- I auditioned, I guess.

- I mean, 'cause like,

I look at you and I would never, you know,

I look at you and I would never, you know,

think full on actor kind of-

- [Rose] Hi, I'm Rose.

- [Rose] Hi, I'm Rose.

- Oh. Cool. - Nice to meet you.

- You're in production?

- You're in production?

- No, I'm in the show.

- She was in the scene with me just before.

- Yeah. - You, didn't you see it?

- Yeah. - You, didn't you see it?

- Oh, so you weren't standing in either?

- Oh, so you weren't standing in either?

- No, I had lines.

- Oh, crazy.

- Oh, crazy.

And they're just gonna chuck all of this on TV.

- Who is this guy?

- Who is this guy?

- Uh, he's an extra.

- Background artist.

I told you before, it was background artist!

I told you before, it was background artist!

- [Director] And cut!

[Rose laughing]

[director shouting]

[director shouting]

- Oh! - That is like, spot on.

[crew chattering]

- I came on too early. - Thank you.

- Okay. - Spot on [faintly speaking]

- Okay. - Spot on [faintly speaking]

- Did I, did I step over your line just? I thought-

- Did I, did I step over your line just? I thought-

- No, you were great. You were great.

- You were fine. - You were great.

You were great.

You were great.

Hey, um, sorry, sorry.

Um, I know I'm not supposed to talk to you guys.

I know that's the rules,

I know that's the rules,

but I'm Kev, the hired extra for the day.

Just wanna say, that's amazing work guys.

Just wanna say, that's amazing work guys.

- Thank you. - Everyone did so well. Yeah.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- Yeah, yeah. So is this actually gonna be on TV,

is it? This?

- Yep. - Yep.

- Filming. Filming with cameras.

- Filming. Filming with cameras.

- Oh, crazy. - I'm gonna get a drink.

- Yeah, we're gonna get coffee so-

- Yeah, we're gonna get coffee so-

- Ah, yep. An L&P would be lovely.

- Yeah.

- So do you do this often?

- So do you do this often?

- Yes.

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

[bright music]

[bright music]

- Guys, what's up?

[men chattering]

Give me...

[men chattering]

[men chattering]

See you at lunch.

See you at lunch.

- Heya. - Yeah, good thanks.

- Sorry. What was that?

- What?

- What did you say?

- Hi. I said "Hi."

- Hi. I said "Hi."

- No you didn't. - Yes I did.

- No. I said, "Hey."

- No. I said, "Hey."

And then you said-

- I'm pretty sure I said, "Hi."

- Hi. What was that?

- Nothing I wasn't talking to you, Pauline.

- Nothing I wasn't talking to you, Pauline.

- Well, I just said hi to Rose

but then she said, "Good thanks."

but then she said, "Good thanks."

- Why would you say, "Good thanks?" That's a bit weird.

- I didn't actually say that, so.

- Yes you did.

- Yes you did.

- Well, sounds like you did.

- Yeah. I said "Hi."

And then you said- - Okay fine, whatever.

And then you said- - Okay fine, whatever.

- But I didn't ask you how you are.

- So she didn't ask you how you are

so why would you say- - Okay, fine!

so why would you say- - Okay, fine!

You know what, I'm actually not good, thanks.

You know what, I'm actually not good, thanks.

I've had a really hard time at home this week

and I didn't want to bring that to work.

and I didn't want to bring that to work.

I wanted to keep professional.

It's hard to keep it together when I'm working,

It's hard to keep it together when I'm working,

but now you know.

I'm going through really tough times.

- I'm just gonna go get some lunch.

- I'm just gonna go get some lunch.

- No thanks.

- What?

[women chattering over each other]

[women chattering over each other]

[women chattering over each other]

- That's so funny.

- That's so funny.

God. You just, you're always on hey, Rose?

God. You just, you're always on hey, Rose?

Always making a-

- Why are you still talking to me?

- Why are you still talking to me?

- Um. What was that?

Oh, I'll be there soon.

Oh, I'll be there soon.

- You don't have an ear piece in.

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

[adventurous music]

[adventurous music]

- Rapunzel. Rapunzel.

Let down your hair.

[hair whirring]

[hair whirring]

[adventurous music]

[adventurous music]

[man grunting]

[man grunting]

Rapunzel.

Uh.

I see you've, uh, had a haircut.

I see you've, uh, had a haircut.

- Do you like it?

I just had it trimmed and I'm really nervous,

I just had it trimmed and I'm really nervous,

so be honest.

- I like it. It's just, uh-

- I like it. It's just, uh-

- Oh my God. You hate it.

- No! No, no, I don't hate it.

- I knew it.

- I knew it.

Short here makes my face look fat.

[man stuttering]

[man stuttering]

There was a moment where it was looking perfect

in the mirror

and then Sheree said,

"Should we take some more off the bottom?"

"Should we take some more off the bottom?"

And I should've said something,

but she was so convincing

and she showed me the pictures in the magazines

and she showed me the pictures in the magazines

and now my boyfriend thinks I look fat!

Great!

- No, babe. Honestly-

- No, babe. Honestly-

- You know what, I told you I was nervous.

Sometimes I feel like maybe you

Sometimes I feel like maybe you

just don't give me the support that I actually need.

- And sometimes,

I feel like you're not actually listening to me.

I feel like you're not actually listening to me.

- Oh. Oh, okay. We're having that conversation, are we?

- Oh. Oh, okay. We're having that conversation, are we?

- No, no, I just-

- Because if we're having that conversation,

then maybe you should come up here

then maybe you should come up here

and say it to my face.

- I would!

But I can't.

But I can't.

- Because you hate it.

You can't bear to be seen with me

You can't bear to be seen with me

'cause I look like a stupid, fat, piece of shit.

[Rapunzel crying]

[Rapunzel crying]

- It's just that your hair-

- What? What? What is it?

- It's too short!

- It's too short!

- You bastard!

I hate you! You know what?

I hate you! You know what?

Take your stuff back!

- Jesus! - Your stupid pot plant!

- Jesus! - Your stupid pot plant!

Your dumb horse!

- That's expensive!

- That's expensive!

- I don't even want this tapestry anymore.

- I don't even want this tapestry anymore.

- My mother made that for you!

- I hated it anyway.

Doesn't go with any of my sh-t.

Doesn't go with any of my sh-t.

[man sighing]

[Rapunzel crying]

[Rapunzel crying]

- Babe.

- I look fat.

- Punzy. - Do you know how hard it is

- Punzy. - Do you know how hard it is

to exercise in this tower?

- Yes. You've said that.

- Do you know how hard it is?

- Do you know how hard it is?

Do you know how hard it is to exercise in this tower?

- I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.

I love your hair

because it's attached to you

because it's attached to you

and you're the woman that I love.

And in about

10 or 12 weeks,

I'll be able to come up there

and tell you that to your face.

and tell you that to your face.

- Yeah?

- Yes. I absolutely love it.

- Yes. I absolutely love it.

- Okay, good.

- Okay, good.

'Cause I was also thinking about getting a fringe.

- Really?

- Really?

Okay.

- You're a real piece of sh-t!

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

- I know this was a traumatic incident for you, Charlotte

- I know this was a traumatic incident for you, Charlotte

and I'm relieved to see you up and well.

Now, just to let you know,

Now, just to let you know,

we can see them, but they can't see us, all right?

Send them in.

[lock clicking]

[suspenseful music]

[suspenseful music]

[door slamming]

Now, just whenever you're ready, Charlotte.

Now, just whenever you're ready, Charlotte.

- It's not number three.

- Mm-hmm.

- Mm-hmm.

Take your time. There's no, no rush.

- Yeah, okay. I think it's number one or number five.

- Yeah, okay. I think it's number one or number five.

- Mm-hmm. We just wanna be sure.

It does say in your description here,

It does say in your description here,

the man had a villain like mustache.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, so definitely one or five.

- Again in these circumstances,

sometimes we just need a little bit of time

sometimes we just need a little bit of time

to jog our memory, so-

- You're right. I shouldn't rule out numbers two and four.

- You're right. I shouldn't rule out numbers two and four.

- Okay.

- Okay.

Just take all the time you need.

We don't wanna rely on any preconceived notions

We don't wanna rely on any preconceived notions

of what we think this person would look like.

of what we think this person would look like.

- Okay. So it's definitely between numbers one, two, four

and five.

and five.

- Ah!

- Okay, I know you're under a lot of pressure at the moment,

but your description matches perfectly

but your description matches perfectly

with number three, okay?

Mustache, with a cape and a hood.

Mustache, with a cape and a hood.

- Yeah, I think I'm just gonna go with my instinct.

- Please don't.

- Yeah, so it's definitely number five.

- Yeah, so it's definitely number five.

- Okay. Number five?

- Yeah. - The man in the wheelchair?

- Yeah. - Okay.

- Yeah. - Okay.

You were assaulted by a man in a wheelchair,

You were assaulted by a man in a wheelchair,

who stabbed you, then ran away with his able bodied legs?

who stabbed you, then ran away with his able bodied legs?

You've even got that in the description here.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah. I just get that feeling.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah. I just get that feeling.

- What about number three?

You know, he's been in here on similar charges before

You know, he's been in here on similar charges before

and he does match your description perfectly.

and he does match your description perfectly.

[man grunting]

- Yeah, I just feel like number three looks like a,

- Yeah, I just feel like number three looks like a,

a nice guy with a happy face.

- He is literally holding a knife.

- He is literally holding a knife.

- I did it!

I stabbed her in the chest.

I stabbed her in the chest.

- Okay. Now he's just, he's saying that he did it.

- Okay. Now he's just, he's saying that he did it.

- I definitely did it.

- I think that's just a nervous stutter, though.

- I think that's just a nervous stutter, though.

Yeah, no it's definitely number two.

- Okay, Charlotte.

I'm concerned that you are racially profiling.

I'm concerned that you are racially profiling.

- I would never! - Might not be aware of it,

- I would never! - Might not be aware of it,

but it's clear that that's what's happening, all right?

Can we get rid of everyone except for number three.

Can we get rid of everyone except for number three.

[lock clicking]

That man was arrested, fleeing the scene of the crime,

That man was arrested, fleeing the scene of the crime,

yelling, "I did it. I did it."

We didn't even need a positive ID here today.

We didn't even need a positive ID here today.

I'm gonna go and arrest him

and we'll see how things go from there.

Thank you for your time.

Thank you for your time.

[man grunting]

[man grunting]

- Oh it's number two.

- Come on! I'm still in uniform.

- Come on! I'm still in uniform.

[man grunting]

Ah!

- Number three, now. - God-

- Number three, now. - God-

- Four.

- Dammit! - She's gone back to two.

It's the girl, the brown one.

- [Cop] Get help!

- [Cop] Get help!

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

- Hi, could I try this on?

- Oh, yeah, sure. Our changing rooms are out the back.

- Oh, yeah, sure. Our changing rooms are out the back.

- Thank you.

[soft pop music]

[woman grunting]

[dress ripping]

[dress ripping]

Shit!

[soft pop music]

[soft pop music]

I'll just wear it out, thanks.

See you.

See you.

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

- Remember ladies, one book per signing

and yes, Tina is happy to sign copies

and yes, Tina is happy to sign copies

of her previous books too.

- "I've Got Reusable Bags but I Just Keep Forgetting Them."

- "I've Got Reusable Bags but I Just Keep Forgetting Them."

- I should just keep them in the car,

- I should just keep them in the car,

but you know me.

You don't know me but-

- No, I don't. - It's really nice

to meet you.

to meet you.

- We all do it. - Thank you.

- Cage-Free Is Close Enough For Me."

- Cage-Free Is Close Enough For Me."

You can't really taste the difference, can you?

- No.

- No.

[woman giggles]

- "I Test Drove a Prius."

- "I Test Drove a Prius."

- Your books have almost changed my life.

- Your books have almost changed my life.

- Thank you for saying that.

"I'm Ready To Sign An Online Petition."

"I'm Ready To Sign An Online Petition."

- I'm scared, but I think I can do it.

- I'm scared, but I think I can do it.

I've also just finished reading your 2015 bestseller,

I've also just finished reading your 2015 bestseller,

"I Think I'm Ready For Doggy Style" and I'm loving it.

- You enjoy. - Thank you.

- You enjoy. - Thank you.

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

- Oh, get in there, Jess!

- Gosh, these games go on forever don't they?

- Gosh, these games go on forever don't they?

Come on, Tina!

[whistle whistling]

[whistle whistling]

[women slurping]

- Lucy.

- Lucy.

I love that cardi, where did you get that?

- Ugh. Get this?

Kmart.

Kmart.

$12.

- Oh, no. - Ugh.

Kmart is the best.

Kmart is the best.

That looks like Gucci.

- Why I got it. - Yeah.

- It looks like it's straight off the runway.

- It looks like it's straight off the runway.

Ladies trip to Kmart later?

I think so. - Yuh-huh.

- Get in there, Jess!

- Oh! Can we talk about this scarf, Kate?

- Oh! Can we talk about this scarf, Kate?

I love it. - Oh, get this?

Sunday market. I bought five of them.

Sunday market. I bought five of them.

One for every day of the week.

- That is clever spending

'cause you look like a model from Gucci.

'cause you look like a model from Gucci.

- Gucci look on a working mums budget.

I like that. That's inspirational.

I like that. That's inspirational.

- You know what's inspirational, Jo?

That scrunchie in your hair.

- Get this? Target. Two bucks. Those earrings.

- Get this? Target. Two bucks. Those earrings.

- $1. School fair.

That jacket?

That jacket?

- Free. Back of a chair in a cafe. I just grabbed it.

- [Both] What?

- Finders keepers right?

- Finders keepers right?

- Well, it looks flaming Gucci.

- Yeah! - What about those boots?

- I didn't pay anything.

- I didn't pay anything.

Just got them out of a charity bin down the street.

Yeah. I mean, you don't miss what you never had.

- You do not miss what you never had.

- You do not miss what you never had.

That belt! I love!

- Get this? Cost me nada.

- Get this? Cost me nada.

Looted it from a burnt down house.

- It's barely charred at all.

- Oh! Well it looks like its Gucci!

- Oh! Well it looks like its Gucci!

[women chattering over each other]

[women chattering over each other]

♪ It's Gucci ♪

♪ It's Gucci ♪

[women shouting]

- Kate! Those pants, they are like the perfect fit!

- Kate! Those pants, they are like the perfect fit!

Where did you get them, bitch?

- Dug them up from the local cemmie

- Dug them up from the local cemmie

and you know the best bit?

- [Both] What's the best bit?

- Also got this necklace from the same dead skellie!

- Also got this necklace from the same dead skellie!

[women chattering over each other]

- I think the best bit is-

- I think the best bit is-

- [All] It looks like it's Gucci!

- Girls trip to the cemmie later?

- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, yeah.

Come on, Courtney!

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[women slow-mo shouting]

[women slow-mo shouting]

[women slow-mo laughing]

[women slow-mo laughing]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- I found one.

[woman laughing]

[woman laughing]

Oh, sh-t!

This cadaver is wearing actual Gucci.

This cadaver is wearing actual Gucci.

[spade clanging]

[spade clanging]

- No one's gonna believe how cheap this was.

Gucci!

Gucci!

- RIP, Joanne.

RIP.

RIP.

Can I wear it to my mums 80th?

Can I wear it to my mums 80th?

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

- Hey dad.

- Hey.

- Could I have some money for tampons?

- Could I have some money for tampons?

- Yeah, course.

- Yeah, course.

Um.

Uh.

Uh.

That's completely fine.

Is, uh, $20 enough?

Is, uh, $20 enough?

- No.

- Thanks dad.

- Thanks dad.

Love you.

- Mm.

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

[upbeat techno music]

[rope thudding]

[rope thudding]

- Oh! Oh!

[magical music]

[magical music]

- God, I'm gonna miss this place.

- God, I'm gonna miss this place.

You know?

A little fruit,

buns and,

little choccies,

sandwiches.

- So you're gonna miss the food?

- So you're gonna miss the food?

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

- Girls, glad I found you.

I just wanna say what an absolute pleasure

I just wanna say what an absolute pleasure

it has been working with you both.

And I'm gonna miss these special times.

And I'm gonna miss these special times.

As you know, I don't have a daughter-

- Oh, you do.

- Oh, you do.

- But if I did, she'd be the perfect mix of both of you.

Laura's vibrant personality

Laura's vibrant personality

and Rose's

crocheting.

- That's unequal compliments.

- That's unequal compliments.

- Laura's zest for life with her infectious energy.

And Rose,

And Rose,

well, you've always got a pen.

- That's true.

- Laura, you've been an absolute rock for me this season.

- Laura, you've been an absolute rock for me this season.

I would like to raise my glass to you.

I would like to raise my glass to you.

I'm gonna miss your empathetic shoulder.

Rose, I'm gonna miss borrowing your car.

Rose, I'm gonna miss borrowing your car.

- That's my nan's car!

- Oh yes, and it's out of petrol.

- Oh yes, and it's out of petrol.

- But the point is,

I'm gonna miss you both equally.

I'm gonna miss you both equally.

However, it's not over yet.

"Funny Boys" has just been given the green light

"Funny Boys" has just been given the green light

so I'll be off doing that.

I'm sure there'll be a little something

for you two in there.

for you two in there.

- I can't believe they're making that?

- Oh, the network wants to do something different,

new direction, comedy.

new direction, comedy.

- This is comedy.

- Mm.

Well, we gave it our best shot, didn't we girls?

Well, we gave it our best shot, didn't we girls?

Now, don't think that just

because we're not working together,

because we're not working together,

does not mean we're not gonna be spending

every single second of every single day together.

- That's exactly what it means.

- Ha! Comedy!

- Ha! Comedy!

[Pauline laughing]

- God. "Funny Boys" hey?

- God. "Funny Boys" hey?

- I don't know. Maybe it won't be that bad.

- I don't know. Maybe it won't be that bad.

- Oh, I had an audition for it the other day

for Woman Two.

- I'm gonna play a Woman One. - Shut up.

- I'm gonna play a Woman One. - Shut up.

- Yeah! - Great!

You'll be great as that.

- Thanks.

- Thanks.

Hey, did you get asked to read for, "Maid With No Lines?"

Hey, did you get asked to read for, "Maid With No Lines?"

- Yeah, but they said I was too brown

for a "Downton Abbey" parody.

- Oh, that's true.

- So, yeah.

- So, yeah.

[bell ringing]

[gentle music]

[gentle music]

- [Narrator] Thanks New Zealand On Air.

That episode looked like it was covered in Gucci.

That episode looked like it was covered in Gucci.

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