Original subtitles

- [Narrator] Here's what you missed

on "Funny Girls" season one.

Rose went into battle with a corporate machine and lost,

Rose went into battle with a corporate machine and lost,

leaving her lumped

with an incompetent producer called Pauline.

- And, action.

- And, action.

But lumped Rose with an even more incompetent crew.

- Ow!

- My arms got tired.

- Are You a face painter?

- Are You a face painter?

- Mm.

- Pauline.

- [Narrator] Camera guy fell in love with Brinley.

- I'm in love with you.

- I'm in love with you.

- [Narrator] Kim went to prison.

[door bangs]

Rose unwittingly made a sex tape.

Laura got fired.

Laura got fired.

- She's gone then.

- [Narrator] Pauline got fired.

- I'm sorry.

- [Narrator] And tension was high

when rose was asked

when rose was asked

to host New Zealand's "Hottest Tween Model".

But she turned it down

to stay friends with Laura.

to stay friends with Laura.

And Pauline proved she wasn't that incompetent

when she stood up to the men. Well, the man.

- That was amazing.

- That was amazing.

- [Narrator] And that was everything you missed

on "Funny girls" season one.

[playful music]

[playful music]

- All right, ladies,

- All right, ladies,

it's taken a lot of hard work and over five emails

but here we are, all in the same room again.

but here we are, all in the same room again.

"Funny girls", season two. We did it baby.

"Funny girls", season two. We did it baby.

[clapping]

[clapping]

[laughs]

Now this year, everything's gonna be different, better.

Now this year, everything's gonna be different, better.

Firstly, we've all had a lot of personal growth

over this year.

over this year.

Rose you've been in England acting on the West End.

- In England we call it the West Bottom.

- In England we call it the West Bottom.

- Good. And Laura, you're now the host

- Good. And Laura, you're now the host

of "Hottest Tween Model".

The most critically hated show in the country, well done.

The most critically hated show in the country, well done.

- Yas, tween.

- And I of course have gotten a lot better at producing

- And I of course have gotten a lot better at producing

thanks to this magazine I found at the dentist.

thanks to this magazine I found at the dentist.

- Ah, Pauline that magazine looks a little bit old.

- Well, I personally love your new look.

- Well, I personally love your new look.

It's yas tween from me. [laughs]

It's yas tween from me. [laughs]

- Why does she have blue eyes now?

- Why do you talk like a chimney sweep?

- Why do you talk like a chimney sweep?

- I've always talked like this.

- Hey, hey, okay. Second leg.

- Hey, hey, okay. Second leg.

Now, I don't wanna put too much pressure on you two,

but I am counting on this season of "Funny Girls"

but I am counting on this season of "Funny Girls"

to represent, vocalize and further all women

and minorities whilst also appealing

and minorities whilst also appealing

to a wide audience of men.

[Rose coughs]

- Oh, is that why those awful men from last season are here?

- Oh, is that why those awful men from last season are here?

- Yes, they are here as male advisors.

- Yes, they are here as male advisors.

Now this magazine really stresses how important

Now this magazine really stresses how important

the opinions of men are.

- It's because that magazine is 30 years old.

- It's because that magazine is 30 years old.

- Rose, Laura, I know we've had our differences in the past,

but before you say anything rash,

but before you say anything rash,

we wanna show you something.

- We all went to a Taylor swift concert

and now we're all feminists.

- We wanna be part of her story.

- We wanna be part of her story.

[clapping]

[clapping]

- Pauline, this is exactly the same as last year.

- Pauline, this is exactly the same as last year.

Can't you see this?

- Rose, can I interrupt you as a feminist

and just say that it's not gonna be the same as last year.

and just say that it's not gonna be the same as last year.

- Look, I'm sensing a lot of hostility.

- Look, I'm sensing a lot of hostility.

Aah, what?

- Can I just say, I feel really unsafe here guys.

- Ah, Tom, it's not very feminist of you

- Ah, Tom, it's not very feminist of you

to make this about you.

- Look, can I shh you as a fellow feminist

- Look, can I shh you as a fellow feminist

and just say that...

- Can I mansplain something to you for a second,

none of this is feminism.

none of this is feminism.

- Oh, can I actually, can I actually mansplain

to you for a second.

- [Man 1] Do you remember the concept?

- [Man 2] Please, come on. We are...

- [Man 2] Please, come on. We are...

[crosstalk]

[bickering]

[bickering]

- "Funny Girls" season two, cowabunga.

[laughs]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- [Announcer] Funny Girls.

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[screams]

[screams]

[upbeat music]

- [Announcer] Funny Girls.

- Now, I am excited about the significant impact

- Now, I am excited about the significant impact

the government's collaboration with pharmaceutical companies

the government's collaboration with pharmaceutical companies

will have on the health sector.

I anticipate immediate short-term gains

I anticipate immediate short-term gains

as well as long lasting benefits.

as well as long lasting benefits.

Now, I am happy to take any questions regarding

the matter of the bill.

the matter of the bill.

Yes, over here.

- Hi, "News Now Online".

Tell us, what percentage of the current health budget

Tell us, what percentage of the current health budget

will be allocated for this new initiative?

will be allocated for this new initiative?

- I believe it begins at 8% rising to 12%

over the course of three years. Thank you.

over the course of three years. Thank you.

- Eh, follow up question.

Who are you wearing?

- A suit, I'm wearing a suit.

Any other questions?

Any other questions?

- Regarding the introduction of the bill to the house?

- Yes, of course, mm.

- Yes, of course, mm.

- You've changed your hair, eh?

- No, I don't see how that is relevant to the topic at hand

- No, I don't see how that is relevant to the topic at hand

so I will not be commenting on that. Anyone?

- Your, your friend is getting pretty mixed feedback.

- Your, your friend is getting pretty mixed feedback.

Is it there to cover some oily, oily head, head skin?

Is it there to cover some oily, oily head, head skin?

- I don't, I don't see how that's,

I don't see how that's relevant to

I don't see how that's relevant to

what we are discussing today.

Any other? Next question.

- Your shoes.

- No.

- No.

- Now I noticed you're wearing flats.

- No.

- Is this a statement on feminism?

- Is this a statement on feminism?

- No, no, no, no, no.

I will not be answering questions on how I look.

I will be answering questions

I will be answering questions

on what has brought us here today,

which is the health bill,

which is the health bill,

which is what we're talking about

and what you're supposed to be answering questions about.

Okay, over here.

Okay, over here.

- Yeah, question.

Are they real?

- Yep, okay,

that's a, that's, that's enough questions for today.

that's a, that's, that's enough questions for today.

Thank you very much coming. Thank you, thank you.

- [Audience] Aah.

- The people have a right to this.

- The people have a right to this.

- Look, all right. Fine, I will answer one more question

- Look, all right. Fine, I will answer one more question

as long as it has to do with the topic at hand.

as long as it has to do with the topic at hand.

Finally, yes. Thank you, here.

Finally, yes. Thank you, here.

- Thank you, Just one quick question.

Why are you being such [beep]?

Why are you being such [beep]?

[papers thudding]

[upbeat trance music]

[upbeat trance music]

- Babes, I'm so sorry you got stood up.

- Babes, I'm so sorry you got stood up.

- Ah, well, thanks for rescuing me.

- Ah, well, thanks for rescuing me.

- No worries, my body shame class

at gym was canceled, so yeah.

at gym was canceled, so yeah.

- I just can't believe he stood me up, you know?

I mean, no text, nothing.

I really thought he was different.

I really thought he was different.

I mean his Tinder profile pic is of him in Africa.

I mean his Tinder profile pic is of him in Africa.

- Ugh, we need some vodka traffic lights.

Where's the bartender?

Where's the bartender?

- Just can't keep getting stood up like this.

I mean, my cousin's wedding is coming up

and I can't find a man to save myself.

and I can't find a man to save myself.

It's like, there's some kind of

[laughs]

man drought.

man drought.

[laughs]

- Oh, my god, there is a man drought.

- Oh, my god, there is a man drought.

Last week I went to my cousin's wedding

and I had to fly solo.

Even had to eat two meals by myself.

Even had to eat two meals by myself.

- I'm calling it.

There's a man drought.

[laughs]

[laughs]

- Where are you, men? I'm parched.

- I'm man thirsty.

- I'm man thirsty.

[laughter]

- I'm de-mandrated.

- I definitely need a man-cation.

- I definitely need a man-cation.

[laughter]

It definitely isn't raining men.

It definitely isn't raining men.

[laughter]

- No, it's dry like the Sahara.

- No, it's dry like the Sahara.

- Yeah, yeah.

- Yeah, yeah.

- Okay, screw it.

You know what? The next guy that walks through that door,

you're gonna ask them out.

you're gonna ask them out.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

- Okay, yes. Yes, yes.

- Okay, yes. Yes, yes.

- Always say, yes. I can do this.

- Okay.

- Okay, okay.

- Okay, okay.

[chattering]

[chattering]

[chattering]

[chattering]

- Any second now.

- Any second now.

[chattering]

[chattering]

Okay, I'm really gonna need that drink now.

Okay, I'm really gonna need that drink now.

Where's the barman?

Where's the barman?

- He was here just a second ago.

- He was here just a second ago.

Wait, Marissa, why was your gym class canceled?

Wait, Marissa, why was your gym class canceled?

- My instructor, he

never showed up.

[suspenseful music]

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

- Mom, I...

- What is it?

[suspenseful music]

- I have to go. My dad is missing.

- I have to go. My dad is missing.

- Don't matter where you go little girly girl,

- Don't matter where you go little girly girl,

there ain't no man to find.

there ain't no man to find.

[suspenseful music]

What you got here is a man drought.

What you got here is a man drought.

What you got here is a man drought.

[suspenseful music]

Don't affect me though.

I went lesbian back in '08, first wave.

I went lesbian back in '08, first wave.

[suspenseful music]

- Brenda, we need to leave now.

- Brenda, we need to leave now.

Let's go.

[suspenseful music]

[suspenseful music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[orchestral music]

- I'm just thinking we could do something more difficult

with our comedy, you know. Just some more raw.

with our comedy, you know. Just some more raw.

- Or we could just make it funny.

- Or we could just make it funny.

Fun and funny.

- Okay, welcome to the new digs.

- Okay, welcome to the new digs.

We're on a bit of a timeshare situation

We're on a bit of a timeshare situation

with a couple of our local access shows.

Save a few bucks.

- Hello and welcome to "Milk Review".

- Hello and welcome to "Milk Review".

- Today's milk is from Fairfield's farm down south.

- Today's milk is from Fairfield's farm down south.

- Where are the cameras?

- Okay, come on.

Sorry.

[laughs]

Come on.

[laughs]

[footsteps thumping]

[footsteps thumping]

And it wouldn't be "Funny Girls"

without the rest of the team now, would it?

without the rest of the team now, would it?

- Oh, hi everyone.

- Oh, hi everyone.

- [Crew] Hi.

- Wait, isn't Kim supposed to be in prison?

- Wait, isn't Kim supposed to be in prison?

- Well, thanks to this, now the studio is like my prison.

[laughs]

[laughs]

- So what did they bring it up to?

- We're on a bit of a tight schedule,

but I'm sure you'll have plenty of time

but I'm sure you'll have plenty of time

for your wacky interaction

and witty banter later in the season, okay.

- Ms. Daniel. You're needed over at "Hottest Tween Model".

- Ms. Daniel. You're needed over at "Hottest Tween Model".

- Hello, sweetheart.

- I'm working mum.

- I'm working mum.

- Oh, sorry. Embarrassing mom alert.

- Let's go.

- Ciao.

Bye darling.

- This isn't gonna be a regular thing, is it?

- This isn't gonna be a regular thing, is it?

[sighs]

Her just swanning off for hours on end.

Her just swanning off for hours on end.

- god I bet you're kicking yourself

for knocking back that hosting gig now.

for knocking back that hosting gig now.

I'd love a hot [beep] towel.

- You just heat up your own towel.

- Neh, wouldn't be the same.

Come on, let's get on with the tour.

Come on, let's get on with the tour.

[laughs]

- Pauline, can we please go to the toilet?

- Pauline, can we please go to the toilet?

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[country music]

- [Narrator 2] The new Holden Colorado

- [Narrator 2] The new Holden Colorado

is the ultimate and work horse.

With a powerful 2.8 liter Duramax diesel engine.

With a powerful 2.8 liter Duramax diesel engine.

It's built tough just like you, whoa, whoa.

It's built tough just like you, whoa, whoa.

What the [beep]?

What the [beep]?

- Hello.

- [Narrator 2] Sorry love, just uh,

didn't expect to see a woman.

didn't expect to see a woman.

[laughs]

- Excuse me?

- [Narrator 2] Yeah well, you usually don't see women

in these types of ads.

in these types of ads.

- What?

- [Narrator 2] Oh, I see, are there kids in the car?

- No, I'm a farmer.

- No, I'm a farmer.

- [Narrator 2] A farmer. Oh, farmer's widow.

- [Narrator 2] A farmer. Oh, farmer's widow.

- No, I own this farm. I run it.

- [Narrator 2] Oh, really?

- [Narrator 2] Oh, really?

Did you learn that from your dead husband, did you?

- No.

- [Narrator 2] Okay, sure.

- [Narrator 2] Okay, sure.

As you were then, I suppose.

[country music]

With a massive 3.5 ton towing capacity,

With a massive 3.5 ton towing capacity,

it's got the guts to get the job...

it's got the guts to get the job...

Hey, easy on the clutch there, you're riding it.

- You know this isn't the first time

- You know this isn't the first time

I've driven a truck.

- [Narrator 2] Yeah well, you could have fooled me.

- [beep] you.

- [beep] you.

- [Narrator 2] 500 newton-meters of torque

means you don't...

means you don't...

Hey, turn the wheel clockwise.

- I know.

- [Narrator 2] Oh, all right, I'm just trying to help.

- [Narrator 2] Oh, all right, I'm just trying to help.

- I didn't ask for you're help.

- [Narrator 2] Yeah okay, calm down.

- Do not tell me to calm down.

- Do not tell me to calm down.

- [Narrator 2] Pfft, whoa.

Must be somebody's time of the month

- You know what? Fine, fine.

- You know what? Fine, fine.

- [Narrator 2] Pfft, here we go.

- If you think you know how to do it, why don't you do it?

- If you think you know how to do it, why don't you do it?

- [Narrator 2] Okay.

- Come on.

- [Narrator 2] Oh, I will.

- [Narrator 2] Oh, I will.

- Yeah.

[country music]

[country music]

- [Narrator 2] [beep]

- [Narrator 2] [beep]

[crickets chirping]

- Are you done?

- [Narrator 2] Ha, yeah.

Yeah, well you, you must have loosened it up for me

Yeah, well you, you must have loosened it up for me

or something.

or something.

The new Holden Colorado for men and women

because apparently nothing is sacred these days.

because apparently nothing is sacred these days.

- Get off my property.

[country music]

[country music]

[hip hop music]

- [Announcer] Funny Girls.

- [Announcer] Funny Girls.

[hip hop music]

[hip hop music]

- [Announcer] Funny Girls.

[Bright music]

[Bright music]

[crashing sound]

- It doesn't bother me, she does "Hottest Tween Model".

- It doesn't bother me, she does "Hottest Tween Model".

I mean, she's very rich now and that's fine with me as well.

Did this eh, answer your question?

Did this eh, answer your question?

I just asked if you wanted a coffee so, not really.

[laughs]

[laughs]

- Aah. Hey, watch out, that camera costs $20,000.

- Aah. Hey, watch out, that camera costs $20,000.

- Why is it in the middle of the hallway then?

- Because that's where it lives.

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

- Why is he back?

You said that things were gonna be different,

You said that things were gonna be different,

but so far they're feeling exactly the same Pauline.

but so far they're feeling exactly the same Pauline.

- Okay, well they're not.

For, for example,

we now have a wardrobe department.

we now have a wardrobe department.

[laughs]

[laughs]

And a costumier.

- Oh, my ears are burning.

- Oh, my ears are burning.

- Oh my god.

- You remember Jasmine? She used to do makeup.

- But then my arthritis got quite bad

- But then my arthritis got quite bad

and I couldn't hold a makeup brush anymore.

But thankfully Pauline came along

But thankfully Pauline came along

'cause I'd really hit rock bottom.

- [Pauline] Only way is up girlfriend.

- [Pauline] Only way is up girlfriend.

[laughter]

- Come on. Oh.

[laughs]

[laughs]

- And I did bring some costumes from my last job

so, Rose, would you like to be a fairy or a princess?

so, Rose, would you like to be a fairy or a princess?

[sighs]

[sighs]

- It's all the same.

- They're quite different.

It's all the same, she's back and it's all.

It's all the same, she's back and it's all.

I feel sick.

I feel sick.

- You could be like a frog. I've got a frog prince.

- It's all the same. It's all the same.

- It's all the same. It's all the same.

- How can we be of service.

[screams]

[screams]

[eerie music]

- It's all the same.

- It's all the same.

- I think you might need a stretcher.

[shrieks]

- It's all the same. It's all the same.

- It's all the same. It's all the same.

[eerie music]

- Hey, my jam.

- Hey, my jam.

[eerie music]

[eerie music]

- It's all the same.

- It's all the same.

[crying]

- She's right.

- She's right.

There's barely any difference between these milks.

[sighs]

[sighs]

What are we doing with our lives?

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[register beeps]

[register beeps]

- $20 thanks.

Yes?

- You gonna ask me for I.D?

[laughs]

[laughter]

[laughter]

- You.

[laughter]

Grant, [laughs] you will never [beep] believe it [laughs].

Grant, [laughs] you will never [beep] believe it [laughs].

[upbeat music]

[gentle music]

[gentle music]

- And here we go.

- And here we go.

A wine list?

- Oh no thank you. No, I can't drink, pregnant.

- Oh no thank you. No, I can't drink, pregnant.

- Oh, sorry, I didn't, I didn't know.

- No, no, no problem.

- Sorry.

- Um, what cheese is in the panini?

- Um, what cheese is in the panini?

- That's brie.

- That's brie.

- Oh, I can't eat soft cheeses, I'm pregnant, you see?

- All right, okay.

- All right, okay.

- Do you use eggs in your, omelet?

- Yes, yeah.

- Ah see, I can't do eggs, see, I'm pregnant.

- Ah see, I can't do eggs, see, I'm pregnant.

And the soup is?

- Uh, that's chicken and sweet corn today.

- Uh, that's chicken and sweet corn today.

- And how was the sweet corn cut?

- I'm sorry?

- I'm sorry?

- Was it cut on a Monday or a Tuesday?

- [laughs] I don't, I'm sorry, I don't know.

- Yeah, okay.

- Yeah, okay.

- Yeah.

- No, okay, I'll leave it best not risk it.

[laughter]

[laughter]

What sort of bread do you use in the vegetarian sandwich?

- Oh, that's five grain.

- Oh, that's five grain.

[sighs]

- My pediatrician says I shouldn't be eating grains.

- My pediatrician says I shouldn't be eating grains.

[grunts]

Something about the hemorrhoids.

[sighs]

- [laughs] Yeah, okay.

- [laughs] Yeah, okay.

Um, well, perhaps just a salad.

- Oh, was that picked within the hour?

- Oh, was that picked within the hour?

- I'm sorry, I, I don't know.

- I'm sorry, I, I don't know.

- Okay. No, no, look, I'll just get the toast rack.

No spreads just toast.

No spreads just toast.

- Okay, good choice.

- Water still or sparkling?

- No, no, no, no, no liquids please, I'm pregnant.

- No, no, no, no, no liquids please, I'm pregnant.

[gentle music]

[gentle music]

- Of course, yeah.

I'll be back in a minute.

I'll be back in a minute.

- Oh waiter? Sorry, can I get that in a takeaway?

I'm just, I'm just a bit worried I'm gonna be late

for my abortion.

for my abortion.

- Yep, okay. I'll, I'll...

- Yep, okay. I'll, I'll...

- Okay, thanks.

[sighs]

[sighs]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[Caribbean music]

- [Radio Presenter] [foreign language]

- [Radio Presenter] [foreign language]

- Maria, Lucia and Isabella [foreign language]

- Maria, Lucia and Isabella [foreign language]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

- [foreign language]

- [foreign language]

- Where are the men? Where are the men?

- Where are the men? Where are the men?

The men, there's no men in there.

- It seems no one is safe

- It seems no one is safe

as the man drought has spread to all continents

with not a single man sighted.

with not a single man sighted.

It's devastating news for all of those trying

It's devastating news for all of those trying

to get back on the horse.

- I just wanna get my groove back.

- I just wanna get my groove back.

[dramatic music]

- Cruise Santana with your local news.

- Cruise Santana with your local news.

- Come on. Mm, god dammit.

- All the motorways are closed.

- All the motorways are closed.

We're gonna need to take the back roads out to the country.

There might still be some men out there.

There might still be some men out there.

[dramatic music]

You got anything?

[dramatic music]

- Nothing.

- Nothing.

- We need to leave now.

- [Marissa] Let's go, let's go.

[dramatic music]

[footsteps thumping]

- The science does not lie Mr. President.

- The science does not lie Mr. President.

We are facing a man drought on a catastrophic scale.

We are facing a man drought on a catastrophic scale.

If you had just listened to me at the start.

If you had just listened to me at the start.

I had a plan.

- Not now Dr. Goldbloom.

- But I have a plan sir, I have a plan.

- But I have a plan sir, I have a plan.

I wrote it all on a napkin right here.

- The vice president would like to see you, sir.

- The vice president would like to see you, sir.

- I have a plan.

- Tell me it's good news Woodward.

- Tell me it's good news Woodward.

- Mr. President I have an urgent matter I need to discuss.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

My cousin's wedding is coming up

and I just wondered whether you might accompany me.

and I just wondered whether you might accompany me.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

Oh my god.

Not you too.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

- Everyone's about to get real thirsty.

- Everyone's about to get real thirsty.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

[footsteps thumping]

- My cousin's wedding, my cousin's wedding.

- My cousin's wedding, my cousin's wedding.

[footsteps thumping]

[footsteps thumping]

[hip hop music]

- [Announcer] "Funny Girls".

- [Announcer] "Funny Girls".

- [Narrator 3] This week on "Hottest Tween Model",

celebrity judge Julian Dennison has a tough decision.

celebrity judge Julian Dennison has a tough decision.

- I'm gonna need an answer now, Julian.

- I'm gonna need an answer now, Julian.

- I had to think with my head, not my heart.

- I had to think with my head, not my heart.

- Is it a yas Tween or a not tween?

- Is it a yas Tween or a not tween?

- [Narrator 3] Who will stay?

- It's a...

- [Narrator 3] And who will be banned

from all devices this week?

from all devices this week?

- It's time to pack your toys and leave the tween tree house.

- It's time to pack your toys and leave the tween tree house.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

- [Narrator 3] Find out, this week on "Hottest Tween Model".

[choral music]

[choral music]

[hip hop music]

- [Announcer] "Funny Girls".

[bell rings]

[bell rings]

- "Little Women's" set shoot on Wednesday.

Just move it to the Saturday. That'd be amazing.

Just move it to the Saturday. That'd be amazing.

- Laura, can I have a word?

- Oh it's okay Casey. I'll take that coffee now.

- Oh it's okay Casey. I'll take that coffee now.

Can you excuse us for a second, Marie?

Can you excuse us for a second, Marie?

- It's not at all my name.

[laughs]

- How cool is this? My own show.

[shrieks]

[shrieks]

- This is so cool.

You think exploiting 12 year old children is cool.

You think exploiting 12 year old children is cool.

- Hey babe, dinner tonight? My treat.

- Okay, but we're not going to McDonald's again.

- Okay, but we're not going to McDonald's again.

- Oh, never mind.

Who's this lovely lady?

Who's this lovely lady?

- What is happening?

- Well, she's my girlfriend,

- Well, she's my girlfriend,

but I'm always in the market for a side boo.

Do you want me to dance for you? See like-

Oh, nice lady judge has a dog. Can I please go and pet it?

Oh, nice lady judge has a dog. Can I please go and pet it?

- Okay, like I've said before,

you don't have to ask me when you wanna do things.

you don't have to ask me when you wanna do things.

- Oh, cool. Awesome.

- Is he your boyfriend?

- Is he your boyfriend?

- Don't say it like that. Like it's weird.

We, we don't hold hands and it's just, you know,

We, we don't hold hands and it's just, you know,

it's just for the publicity.

- He is a child. God everyone has gone insane

- He is a child. God everyone has gone insane

since I went to Great Britain.

- Okay. Nobody calls it that.

- Okay. Nobody calls it that.

And why, why have you got the accent?

You were only there for like six months.

- Well, why do you have a stupid [beep] wig.

- Well, why do you have a stupid [beep] wig.

You look like a stripper.

You know what?

You know what?

I came here to talk about funny girls season two,

but I think I already have my answer, you know.

I'm not doing it.

I'm not doing it.

[laughs]

- You know what? That's, that's just perfect

because I don't actually wanna do it

because I don't actually wanna do it

with someone that's a pretentious glazer, like you.

with someone that's a pretentious glazer, like you.

- What is that?

- It's a tween word.

- It's a tween word.

- Fine. Let's go tell Pauline the great news.

- Fine. Let's go tell Pauline the great news.

- Excellent.

[bell rings]

Take your hat off you're inside.

Take your hat off you're inside.

- I was outside before and I'm going outside again.

- I was outside before and I'm going outside again.

- We should take a selfie later, yeah, mm.

Fist bump.

Fist bump.

[upbeat music]

- Okay.

- Okay.

- This is so nice.

- I used to love this game as a kid.

- I used to love this game as a kid.

[sighs]

Is your person a woman?

Is your person a woman?

- Yes.

- Okay.

[ cards tapping]

[ cards tapping]

- The whole back row [laughter]

- The whole back row [laughter]

A lot of men in this game.

[laughter]

[laughter]

- Okay, cool. [laughs]

- Is your person a woman?

- No.

- No.

- Okay.

[cards tapping]

[cards tapping]

Oh, easy.

[laughter]

[laughter]

[gentle dramatic music]

[gentle dramatic music]

- [beep] okay. [laughs]

- [beep] okay. [laughs]

This game is hard, isn't it?

Is this the hard version of this game?

Is this the hard version of this game?

- I know, I know, ask me something

about the way they look.

about the way they look.

- Well, does your person . . .

Look like

Look like

She has

a kind face

a kind face

- They kind of all have the same face.

- They kind of all have the same face.

Ask me something about the way they look.

- Does your person look like she is not legally allowed

- Does your person look like she is not legally allowed

to have more than one child?

to have more than one child?

Actually, yeah, don't answer that one.

Take that one back.

- No, just ask me something about them.

- No, just ask me something about them.

- Is your person aging?

Are they aging quickly?

Nope? Asexual.

Nope? Asexual.

Is she asexual?

Kind of not into men, not into women. Just asexual.

Kind of not into men, not into women. Just asexual.

No? Is she a...?

- Just ask me about how they look.

- Just ask me about how they look.

[gentle music]

- [inaudible]

- [inaudible]

- I can't understand what you're saying.

- Cause you're not listening, fantastic.

[crosstalk]

[crosstalk]

- That's not true.

- You never listen to me.

- Are you trying to pick a fight?

- Let's have this fight then.

- Let's have this fight then.

- Just, just ask me something about them.

- No let's, no, let's have this fight.

- [Beep] sake, just ask me a proper question.

- [Beep] sake, just ask me a proper question.

- So is she good at maths?

- Just ask me where she's from.

- Fine, ugh. Is your person Asian?

- Fine, ugh. Is your person Asian?

- Oh, Asian, yes. [laughs]

- Oh, Asian, yes. [laughs]

[laughter]

[laughter]

You won.

- I won. [laughs]

- Okay, I'm gonna guess your guy now.

- Okay, I'm gonna guess your guy now.

Okay. Um, is your guy a Jew?

Okay. Um, is your guy a Jew?

[dramatic music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[suspenseful music]

[suspenseful music]

- [beep]

- [beep]

[footsteps thumping]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- My cousin's wedding, my cousin's wedding,

- My cousin's wedding, my cousin's wedding,

my cousin's wedding.

my cousin's wedding.

My cousin's wedding.

My cousin's wedding. My cousin's wedding.

My cousin's wedding. My cousin's wedding.

- Give it a rest Penny.

Your cousin's not gonna get married. There's no groom.

Your cousin's not gonna get married. There's no groom.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

[screaming]

[horn hooting]

It can't.

It can't.

[horn hooting]

It's a man horn.

It's a man horn.

[motorcycle engine revving]

[motorcycle engine revving]

Could it be? Has the day finally arrived? [laughs]

Could it be? Has the day finally arrived? [laughs]

Could it be? Has the day finally arrived? [laughs]

- I was riding the western territory,

- I was riding the western territory,

well, what's left of it, and I found this.

well, what's left of it, and I found this.

Ladies, 10 years of this comes to an end today.

Ladies, 10 years of this comes to an end today.

Ladies, 10 years of this comes to an end today.

I give you,

a man.

- Well, hello, hello ladies.

- Well, hello, hello ladies.

Who here likes magic?

[fire crackling]

[crickets chirping]

[crickets chirping]

- I think I'll wait for the next one.

- I think I'll wait for the next one.

- [beep] street magicians.

- [beep] street magicians.

- Can I, can I get a ride back to the shagging wagon?

- Can I, can I get a ride back to the shagging wagon?

That's what I call my car. [laughs]

Well, it's more a van.

Well, it's more a van.

[upbeat music]

[orchestral music]

[orchestral music]

[sneezes]

[sneezes]

- No.

- It's searching. Why is it searching when it's just there?

- It's searching. Why is it searching when it's just there?

- Oi, we're quitting.

- Oi, we're quitting.

- Oh, okay. Here we go.

Now I got this after the end of the last season.

Now I got this after the end of the last season.

- [Christie] Hi, my name is Christie

and I love "Funny Girls" and Rose and Laura

and I love "Funny Girls" and Rose and Laura

and everyone so much.

It's like you made a whole show just for me and my friends

It's like you made a whole show just for me and my friends

and that hardly ever happens for women, I mean.

and that hardly ever happens for women, I mean.

Anyway, I just wanna say I can't wait for the next season.

I love you guys so much.

I love you guys so much.

Okay, thanks. Bye.

[phone beeping]

[phone beeping]

- And there are at least three more where that came from.

Listen, I get it.

Listen, I get it.

Once again, the conditions aren't ideal,

Once again, the conditions aren't ideal,

but what we're doing here matters. It's not just about us.

This is bigger than us.

This is bigger than us.

Now, I don't have a daughter, but if I did...

Now, I don't have a daughter, but if I did...

- Wait no, you, you do have a daughter.

I work with her.

I work with her.

- Okay, okay, okay, okay,

and I would be proud to let her watch your show.

and I would be proud to let her watch your show.

But it's enough from me.

I'm just gonna pass over your contract

I'm just gonna pass over your contract

so you can rip them up.

[sighs]

[sighs]

I am so proud of you, girls.

I am so proud of you, girls.

[footsteps thumping]

You guys have a great day. I'm going straight to legals.

You guys have a great day. I'm going straight to legals.

[door slams]

[door slams]

- Look, if we're going to do this show together,

I think you should know that I've been doing

I think you should know that I've been doing

a little bit of an accent.

a little bit of an accent.

- You should probably know that this is a wig.

- You should probably know that this is a wig.

- Yeah, I've seen it like three times.

- What?

- [Pauline] Hey, Christie,

- [Pauline] Hey, Christie,

thanks so much for pretending to like the show.

You are a lifesaver.

I'll see you at Ego jogging tomorrow, okay. Bye.

I'll see you at Ego jogging tomorrow, okay. Bye.

- Pauline you sneaky [beep].

- Pauline you sneaky [beep].

- Yeah. Hi, it's Pauline Swank here calling for Dr. Ross.

Yeah, I was just ringing about those test results.

Um, yeah, because I thought it was thrush

Um, yeah, because I thought it was thrush

but um, yeah, I don't think the antibiotics

have been working because I'm still very itchy up there

have been working because I'm still very itchy up there

and I've tried...

[crosstalk]

- No, no, no, no, no, no.

- No, no, no, no, no, no.

- No, no, no.

[gentle jazz music]

[gentle jazz music]

[END CREDITS]

[END CREDITS]

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