Original subtitles

[soft music]

[soft music]

- Okay, so here we are, "Funny Girls"

- Okay, so here we are, "Funny Girls"

season one, episode two,

season one, episode two,

and none of it is remotely usable.

Rubbish.

Can't film any of it, okay?

- You know we have that on computers.

Just like in a Word doc.

Just like in a Word doc.

We can print that out again.

- Yeah, but that's symbolic, isn't it?

- Yeah, but that's symbolic, isn't it?

Look, I know I'm no expert on comedy,

but my focus group didn't like it one bit.

but my focus group didn't like it one bit.

- Who's your focus group?

- I just finished reading it to my daughter, Cassie.

- I just finished reading it to my daughter, Cassie.

Didn't laugh once.

- She's wearing her headphones.

- She's wearing her headphones.

- Come on, Pauline.

There are some really good ideas in there.

What about "Girl Batman"?

What about "Girl Batman"?

- Isn't that just Batgirl?

- No.

- No.

- Look, I can't understand a single word

that you two are saying, okay?

And that's why I've decided to be a lot more hands-on.

And that's why I've decided to be a lot more hands-on.

And that's why I've decided to be a lot more hands-on.

From now on, Pauline will be shadowing you around

and Pauline's paws are going to be over

every aspect of the show.

every aspect of the show.

- That is a worse idea than "Back to the Fuchsia".

- That is a worse idea than "Back to the Fuchsia".

- Hey, that was my idea.

- That wasn't...

- That wasn't...

Yeah, I was going to talk to you about it later,

but it's not...

It wasn't good.

And it wasn't a good one.

And it wasn't a good one.

- Okay, Ms. Suspended From School, let's go.

- What for?

- Fire starting.

- Fire starting.

- Hey, suspected fire starting.

Okay, ladies, let's get out there

and make an episode of accessible sketch comedy,

and make an episode of accessible sketch comedy,

maintaining an empowering outlook for women.

Come on!

Come on!

- It sounds so bad when you pitch it like that.

- She's scary.

[upbeat electronic music]

[upbeat electronic music]

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

- Thank you so much for doing this at such short notice.

- Thank you so much for doing this at such short notice.

Amazing.

Amazing.

Now, Gracie goes to bed at 8:30, latest.

All right?

All right?

And don't give her any sugary drinks,

otherwise she will be up all [Beeping] night.

- Okay.

- Okay.

[car horn honking]

- Oh, there's my taxi.

- Oh, there's my taxi.

So, you just help yourself to anything in the fridge,

kitchen, pantry, all yours.

Make yourself at home.

Make yourself at home.

[echoing] Make yourself at home.

Make yourself at home.

Make yourself at home.

♪ I make myself at home ♪

♪ I make myself at home ♪

♪ I make myself at home ♪

♪ Su casa mi casa ♪

♪ Su casa mi casa ♪

♪ Ha ha ha ♪

♪ Ha ha ha ♪

♪ These chips, they're mine ♪

♪ Your perfume, it's mine ♪

♪ Your perfume, it's mine ♪

♪ Your heater, it's mine ♪

♪ I'm drinking your wine ♪

♪ I'm drinking your wine ♪

♪ No one girl can use all this power ♪

♪ Napping on the couch $10 an hour ♪

♪ Napping on the couch $10 an hour ♪

♪ Breaking the rules about having boys over ♪

♪ Gonna get to second base on you sofa ♪

♪ Gonna get to second base on you sofa ♪

♪ Stealing all your lotion ♪

♪ Smooth criminal ♪

♪ These biccies weren't open ♪

♪ These biccies weren't open ♪

- I'm back!

- Shit, shit!

- Shit, shit!

- [Mom] Just forgot my phone.

- Get your pants on!

[Beep]!

[Beep]!

♪ Uh, yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, yeah ♪

[phone ringing]

[audience applauds]

[audience applauds]

- Welcome back to "Don't Check Your Phone".

- Welcome back to "Don't Check Your Phone".

The game show where these contestants

stand to win $50,000 right here, right now,

stand to win $50,000 right here, right now,

stand to win $50,000 right here, right now,

as long as you...

- [Audience] Don't check your phone!

- [Audience] Don't check your phone!

- Your time starts now.

- Your time starts now.

[upbeat music starts]

[upbeat music starts]

[phone dings]

[phone beeps]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone chimes]

[phone chimes]

[upbeat music stops]

[upbeat music stops]

- Right, sorry, I was not paying

attention to that last round.

So, you all win $50,000!

So, you all win $50,000!

How does it feel?!

[clicking]

[clicking]

[buzzing]

[buzzing]

No, I cannot make that appointment.

No, I cannot make that appointment.

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

- [Announcer] Meet Dana.

- I'm just a normal 18-year-old girl.

I graduated from high school.

I graduated from high school.

I have a great babysitting job.

I have a great babysitting job.

Yeah!

Gonna cry now?

And that guy over there.

And that guy over there.

No, he's not a car model.

That's my boyfriend Jed.

That's my boyfriend Jed.

I was on top of the world.

That was until I wound up here.

That was until I wound up here.

You guessed it.

I'm in prison!

I'm in prison!

[laughs]

- Who the [Beep] are you talking to?

- Who the [Beep] are you talking to?

- [Announcer] Lock in your Thursdays

- [Announcer] Lock in your Thursdays

with "Dope! I'm in Prison".

- How long have you been smuggling drugs, Dana?

- How long have you been smuggling drugs, Dana?

- Mom, you know how bad I am at keeping track of time.

- Mom, you know how bad I am at keeping track of time.

- Sweetheart, you killed a man.

- Sweetheart, you killed a man.

- Parents, am I right?

- Parents, am I right?

They can be such a drag, but lucky for me,

mine can only visit once a month.

mine can only visit once a month.

I mean, things aren't all bad here.

I mean, things aren't all bad here.

We get free food!

- Here's your lunch, asshole.

- Here's your lunch, asshole.

- Oh, I'm sorry, you guys have any

like gluten-free or vegan-vegetarian options?

like gluten-free or vegan-vegetarian options?

Good one, Dana, you just made a new friend.

Good one, Dana, you just made a new friend.

[laughs]

Everyone here is really different

than my friends at Sunnydale High.

than my friends at Sunnydale High.

- I'm gonna make you my bitch.

- But they're each special and unique in their own way.

- You'd better step the [Beep] off, bitch!

- You'd better step the [Beep] off, bitch!

- Hey Jill, who's your favorite member of One Direction?

- Hey Jill, who's your favorite member of One Direction?

- I'm going to kick you in the head.

- She obviously means Niall.

- She obviously means Niall.

It's really fun in here, but I am going to get out.

Lucky my lawyer is working around the clock

Lucky my lawyer is working around the clock

to make sure that that happens.

to make sure that that happens.

- I'm sorry, Dana.

We can't get you an early release.

We can't get you an early release.

They're going to give you the chair.

- The chair?

- The chair?

What is this like a wrestling match or something?

[laughs]

- Dana, this is prison.

- Dana, this is prison.

The person who killed was the president's son.

- What? No.

- What? No.

You're funny.

You're so funny.

You're so funny.

I have a question.

Like where is the camera on this?

Because it's like, I'm looking at it,

Because it's like, I'm looking at it,

and I can't...

Is there like a reverse,

Is there like a reverse,

like a reverse mode?

Well, who'd a thunk that prison would be so wackadoo.

Well, who'd a thunk that prison would be so wackadoo.

Well, I certainly learned my lesson,

and some lessons that I wasn't even expecting to.

and some lessons that I wasn't even expecting to.

And honestly, if I could do it all again,

And honestly, if I could do it all again,

I would.

Treason and all.

Oh, where are we going?

[electricity buzzing]

- [Announcer] "Dope! I'm in Prison".

- [Announcer] "Dope! I'm in Prison".

Lock it in Thursdays at six.

Right after "My Dad Ate My Brains",

Right after "My Dad Ate My Brains",

only on Nick, Jr.

- Hi guys!

- Hi guys!

Oh my god, it's so good to see you.

I'm sorry I haven't uploaded a video for a while.

I'm sorry I haven't uploaded a video for a while.

My dad went to prison for tax fraud,

and my mom's had me shredding documents like all week so.

and my mom's had me shredding documents like all week so.

[groans]

[groans]

That's finally over, so we can get back to it.

Today, I'm just going to teach you like a very simple,

Today, I'm just going to teach you like a very simple,

elegant everyday look that we can just use every day.

elegant everyday look that we can just use every day.

Really good for wearing...

Oh my god, I look like shit.

Oh my god, I look like shit.

So, we're going to take this liquid eyeliner pen,

and we're just going to...

and we're just going to...

Now, this is like...

You just got to like kind of be confident with this.

You just got to like kind of be confident with this.

Like basically we're going to do

just the one line from the cheekbone.

just the one line from the cheekbone.

Now, obviously, I've used black here,

Now, obviously, I've used black here,

but you can use whatever color you want.

And we really want some definition around the head.

And we really want some definition around the head.

That's really important.

And of course, hairs on the balls are optional.

And of course, hairs on the balls are optional.

It's totally a preference,

It's totally a preference,

but I love me some hairy balls,

so, they're going on.

so, they're going on.

So, there we go.

A really nice natural look that you can wear every day.

So, if you like this video of me drawing a dick on my face,

So, if you like this video of me drawing a dick on my face,

please subscribe to my channel.

please subscribe to my channel.

Should be a button come up right here.

Should be a button come up right here.

And yeah, have a great week, guys!

See you later.

♪ Uh, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Uh, yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

- Hai, hai, hai, hai, hai!

- Hai, hai, hai, hai, hai!

[knocking]

[knocking]

- Time for me to get my money.

Come in!

Come in!

Looks like you finally came around, pig.

Looks like you finally came around, pig.

- Cut! Cut!

- Cut! Cut!

Okay, I'm sorry, I know it's not my place,

Okay, I'm sorry, I know it's not my place,

but I just felt like you were being

a bit rude when she came through the door.

a bit rude when she came through the door.

- Do you mean me or the character?

- Again, it's not my place,

- Again, it's not my place,

but in the real estate business,

if we have someone come through the door,

if we have someone come through the door,

we often greet them with a friendly,

you know, "Hello, and how were you?"

you know, "Hello, and how were you?"

I know it's not much to look at,

but the potential here is incredible.

but the potential here is incredible.

- Pauline, we're not selling a house.

- Well, not at this rate you're not.

- Well, not at this rate you're not.

And I'd also maybe hang a picture frame

over some of the stained wallpaper.

over some of the stained wallpaper.

- Sorry.

Pauline, I think maybe you should reconsider

Pauline, I think maybe you should reconsider

just how hands-on you are.

just how hands-on you are.

When we're filming, when we're on set,

I just don't think it's a really good idea

I just don't think it's a really good idea

for you to be here all the time, and interrupting.

- Sure, sure.

- Sure, sure.

I'd also like you to consider baking some bread.

I mean, the smell creates a really inviting atmosphere.

I mean, the smell creates a really inviting atmosphere.

And I was thinking that maybe Cassie could bake some bread.

And I was thinking that maybe Cassie could bake some bread.

- I think she's already baked as it is.

- I think she's already baked as it is.

- Great news.

Okay!

- No, she's...

- No, she's...

- Let's take it from the top!

Can I say action?

Great.

Quickly, Lauren.

Action!

- You might want to not stand in front of the camera.

- Oh, sorry.

- Oh, sorry.

This is so exciting for me.

This is so exciting for me.

And second action!

[knocking]

[knocking]

- Time for me to get my money.

Come in, come in, thank you.

Come in, come in, thank you.

- [Pauline] Really good.

Really, really good.

Really, really good.

- Can you not talk during the take?

- [Pauline] Just carry on, carry on, carry on.

And cut!

[bell ringing]

Beautiful, beautiful.

Beautiful, beautiful.

- Swimmers have the best bodies.

Lovely broad shoulders.

Lovely broad shoulders.

- Now, there's an even better one in here.

- Oh, careful, you're getting pretty deep in there.

- Oh, careful, you're getting pretty deep in there.

- I think I know how to Insta.

- I think I know how to Insta.

- Emma, no!

- Emma, no!

What did you just do?!

- I just liked an 84-week-old shirtless model.

- Well, can you unlike it?!

- Well, can you unlike it?!

- It's too late.

Pack your bags.

You're coming with us.

You're coming with us.

- Who are you?

- Who's that?

Only the best social media faux pas

Only the best social media faux pas

assessment agent in this country.

assessment agent in this country.

- That's a thing?

- I'm Marian Damage, and I'm in control.

- I'm Marian Damage, and I'm in control.

[electronic music]

[electronic music]

All right team, we've got an 85-week deep Insta like.

You're going to have to camp here

You're going to have to camp here

while this dies down.

- This seems like a lot of effort,

- This seems like a lot of effort,

I mean, I just made a mistake.

- Ha, social media incident repair

- Ha, social media incident repair

is a billion dollar industry, kid.

This guy is the whole package.

This guy is the whole package.

Do you really want him to think

you're a creep just because of one lousy double tap?

you're a creep just because of one lousy double tap?

- Okay, so I've hacked his account

and tried to delete the notification.

and tried to delete the notification.

No dice.

Can't get passed the security question.

Can't get passed the security question.

- Mother's maiden name?

- Childhood best friend.

- God dammit, that's entirely subjective.

- God dammit, that's entirely subjective.

Twins how are you going with the distraction?

Twins how are you going with the distraction?

- I've set up a series of decoy accounts

to like a bunch of photos at random.

to like a bunch of photos at random.

- We bombard his feed with likes,

might be enough to bury the rogue 85-weeker.

- Are you sure it won't look fake?

- Are you sure it won't look fake?

- Come on, Marian.

- [Both] We're the twins.

- [Both] We're the twins.

- Who's paying for all of this?

- Who's paying for all of this?

- Emma, do you have a younger sibling,

- Emma, do you have a younger sibling,

or a pet we could say was on your phone at the time?

Preferably one with thumbs.

Preferably one with thumbs.

- No, I really don't.

- God dammit!

- God dammit!

Emma, we may have to look at you owning up to it.

Emma, we may have to look at you owning up to it.

- Trevor, don't.

- Because sometimes, you have to be upfront with people

- Because sometimes, you have to be upfront with people

about how you feel about them.

about how you feel about them.

Or it could severely effect things down the line.

- Not here, not at work!

- Not here, not at work!

[romantic music]

[romantic music]

[heavy breathing]

- Marian, I can confirm subject is at the pool.

He has not seen the like yet.

He has not seen the like yet.

- He does have lovely shoulders.

- I've got a clear shot, just give me the word.

- Make the shot!

- Make the shot!

- Wait!

I've got a name of a childhood best friend.

I've got a name of a childhood best friend.

You're not going to like who it is.

You're not going to like who it is.

- The president of the United States of America?

Leave him to me.

- It's lovely seeing you this weekend.

- It's lovely seeing you this weekend.

It's a pity your father couldn't come,

but someone has to stay home and look after the cat.

but someone has to stay home and look after the cat.

Oh, I'd better start making tracks.

You know I like to get to the airport

with plenty of time to spare.

with plenty of time to spare.

How about we pop in at the supermarket

on the way to the airport,

on the way to the airport,

and I'll get some groceries for your flat?

[snapping]

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ This song's all about being generous with your money ♪

♪ This song's all about being generous with your money ♪

♪ So, thank your mum ♪

♪ So, thank your mum ♪

♪ Got that mum money ♪

♪ Yeah, I got that mum money ♪

♪ Got that mum money ♪

♪ Yeah, I got that mum money ♪

♪ Yeah, I got that mum money ♪

♪ Got that mum money ♪

♪ Yeah, I got that mum money ♪

♪ Got that mum money ♪

♪ Got that mum money ♪

♪ Yeah, I got that mum money ♪

♪ Everything I want and nothing that I need ♪

♪ Everything I want and nothing that I need ♪

♪ With the cheddar I don't buy cheddar ♪

♪ I buy stinky cheese ♪

♪ Don't care how much it costs ♪

♪ Don't care how much it costs ♪

♪ Buy some lovely body wash ♪

♪ Organic soy sauce ♪

♪ Feelin' fancy, feelin' posh ♪

♪ Feelin' fancy, feelin' posh ♪

♪ Making it rain with bread cut whole grain ♪

♪ Fill my freezer full of meat ♪

♪ This bitch insane ♪

♪ This bitch insane ♪

♪ Chuck in the trolley without checking the price ♪

♪ Chuck in the trolley without checking the price ♪

♪ Wine for my flatmates ♪

♪ My mum's so nice ♪

♪ My mum's so nice ♪

- I'm sorry, darling.

I might be pushing it to get to the airport

I might be pushing it to get to the airport

with only three hours to spare.

with only three hours to spare.

Let's do the groceries next time, all right?

- [Announcer] Coco love.

- [Announcer] Coco love.

- I'm Rose Matafeo for Coco Love.

Coco Love is a new, refreshing beverage that

Coco Love is a new, refreshing beverage that

brings all the exotic flavors of the tropics

brings all the exotic flavors of the tropics

directly to you.

It's filled with hydrating electrolytes,

It's filled with hydrating electrolytes,

energizing minerals,

and the taste...

- [Announcer] Coco Love.

- Oh, hi, Rose.

Are you drinking Coco Love?

Are you drinking Coco Love?

Yum!

When I think summer, I think...

When I think summer, I think...

- [Announcer] Coco Love.

- [Announcer] Coco Love.

- Oh hi, girls!

Coco Love is great after an intense sports match.

Coco Love is great after an intense sports match.

It's the hydrating power that makes you feel...

It's the hydrating power that makes you feel...

[spits]

[spits]

So good.

- Coco Love.

- Coco Love.

Rhianna drinks it,

so I guess we all have to now.

so I guess we all have to now.

- [All] Coco Love.

- [Announcer] Because tasting good

has nothing to do with good taste.

has nothing to do with good taste.

Coco Love

May not contain actually coconut.

May not contain actually coconut.

- I'm not sure what end it's gonna come out.

I'm wearing white.

I'm wearing white.

- You're wearing white we-

- Don't touch me, don't touch me!

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh, uh, uh, uh yeah ♪

♪ Funny girls ♪

- Oh god!

- Oh god!

- Oh, sweetie, have you ever considered using eye cream,

'cause you're looking a little stressed?

'cause you're looking a little stressed?

- Yeah, no, it's just been a really stressful week,

- Yeah, no, it's just been a really stressful week,

to be honest.

Pauline has just been so...

- No, it's all good.

- No, it's all good.

Looks like she's taken over as head chef at catering.

- Oh god, make sure she wears gloves.

- Oh god, make sure she wears gloves.

Jesus, it's just like I'm babysitting all of the time now.

Jesus, it's just like I'm babysitting all of the time now.

You know what, I'm call it now,

I'm never having kids ever.

I'm never having kids ever.

- Oh honey, you'd be great with kids.

- No, seriously.

I have a three-year-old niece, right?

I have a three-year-old niece, right?

Was my birthday last week,

she wrote "To Whom It May Concern," in the card.

she wrote "To Whom It May Concern," in the card.

- Well, having kids, greatest experience of my life.

- Well, having kids, greatest experience of my life.

Jackson, put the lighter down!

Jackson, put the lighter down!

Oh Ashton, that is not your iPhone, sweetie.

- Oh shit, that's mine!

Sorry, sorry for swearing.

Sorry, sorry for swearing.

- Give the phone to the tired lady.

Now, what do you say?

- Shit!

- Shit!

- And be at the ready.

- Approachable boss, approaching.

- Approachable boss, approaching.

- No, no, no, no, you're not allowed

to do my makeup, all right?

to do my makeup, all right?

- I would not change a thing.

- I would not change a thing.

Shaz, if you need some help with the kids,

Shaz, if you need some help with the kids,

my daughter Cassie could do with

a little bit of dosh.

Actually, on second thought,

Actually, on second thought,

I don't think our children should meet.

- That's a fair call.

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh uh uh yeah ♪

♪ Uh uh uh yeah ♪

- Wow.

- I have no words.

- I have no words.

- What a beautiful and important film.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

Shall we go?

- Yeah.

- Okay.

- Okay.

I just feel like everyone should

have to see that film, you know?

have to see that film, you know?

- That scene on the boat where they make love.

So tender and so beautiful.

So tender and so beautiful.

- Oh my god, I know.

And what about when the husband

And what about when the husband

was getting killed by the virus?

was getting killed by the virus?

I'm just getting emotional thinking about it now.

- I literally have goosebumps.

- I literally have goosebumps.

- It's just so visceral.

Where was it filmed again?

Where was it filmed again?

- I think it was Canada or something.

- I think it was Canada or something.

- I just feel like the film actually changed my life.

- I just feel like the film actually changed my life.

- You look different.

- You look different.

- Seriously, 'cause I feel different.

- Yeah, like you look the same,

- Yeah, like you look the same,

but like something's different.

- Changed.

- Yeah, changed.

Completely changed.

Completely changed.

[sighs]

God, I hope there's a sequel.

- Oh, same.

- Oh, same.

- Beautiful film, wasn't it?

- Beautiful film, wasn't it?

- Stunning.

- Just profound.

- Just profound.

- Absolutely stunning.

- You are so lucky working here,

- You are so lucky working here,

and getting to see amazing films like this every day.

and getting to see amazing films like this every day.

I wish I had your life.

- I hate conferences.

- I hate conferences.

They're so bloody boring.

- Yes, oh and Sara Kendricks so going

to get saleperson of the year again.

to get saleperson of the year again.

- Only because she's making out with Tim.

- Yeah, so can't complain about the free hotel room, eh?

- Yeah, so can't complain about the free hotel room, eh?

- Yeah, so can't complain about the free hotel room, eh?

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

♪ We about that hotel life ♪

♪ We about that hotel life ♪

♪ Livin' up in a hotel life ♪

♪ We about that hotel, hotel life ♪

♪ We about that hotel, hotel life ♪

♪ We about that hotel, hotel life ♪

♪ Free pillow mints ♪

♪ On arrival ♪

♪ Did you know you're allowed to take the Bible ♪

♪ Did you know you're allowed to take the Bible ♪

♪ Face flannel ♪

♪ Movie channel ♪

♪ Movie channel ♪

♪ Using all the water opposite of a camel ♪

♪ Slipping slippers in my purse ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm taking advantage ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm taking advantage ♪

♪ Hotel staff gonna clean up the carnage ♪

♪ Ain't no way I'm gonna leave my bed made ♪

♪ Ain't no way I'm gonna leave my bed made ♪

♪ Because you get paid to make my bed maid ♪

♪ Because you get paid to make my bed maid ♪

♪ Feelin' all these tiny shampoos ♪

♪ Feelin' all these tiny shampoos ♪

♪ Sipping on free miniature booze ♪

♪ Wear two robes don't care what you think ♪

♪ Wear two robes don't care what you think ♪

♪ Pouring free lemonade down the sink ♪

♪ Pouring free lemonade down the sink ♪

♪ What what ♪

♪ King singles ♪

♪ Free Pringles ♪

- Wait, Rose!

- Wait, Rose!

What the hell are you doing?!

- Yeah, hold up, I'm sorting some free room service.

- No, no, no, those things definitely are not free.

- No, no, no, those things definitely are not free.

They're very overpriced.

They're very overpriced.

- But the Pringles are free, right?

- No, they're $15.

- No, they're $15.

[gasps]

A tube.

- Oh my god, I used so many tubes of them

- Oh my god, I used so many tubes of them

to make my tube man.

- What, you didn't even eat any of the chips.

- What, you didn't even eat any of the chips.

- But they made my mouth dry.

Oh, does this mean I have to pay for those male strippers?

Oh, does this mean I have to pay for those male strippers?

- We are not doing this for free.

- Do you accept payment in the currency of floor chips?

- Do you accept payment in the currency of floor chips?

- Do you accept payment in the currency of floor chips?

No?

You're running a business I get it.

You're running a business I get it.

- I can see my future.

- I can see my future.

- It's just amazing, isn't it?

That one big, giant episode of television

That one big, giant episode of television

can be made on one tiny little computer.

can be made on one tiny little computer.

I mean, you editors do a hell of a job.

I mean, you editors do a hell of a job.

- Well, actually, the only thing these computers

are any good for is they get so hot,

are any good for is they get so hot,

you can reheat your fish and chips on them.

Needs another minute or so.

Anyway, this is what I've managed

Anyway, this is what I've managed

to put together from today's rushes.

to put together from today's rushes.

- Okay, cut, cut!

Action!

Okay, well done.

Okay, well done.

Keep up the energy.

Action!

Do you have any shots without me in them?

Do you have any shots without me in them?

- Yeah, but I think in all of them

you're eating Bhuja Mix to close to the sound guy.

you're eating Bhuja Mix to close to the sound guy.

- Yeah, I was, that's right.

[crunching]

[crunching]

Okay, you can turn it off.

I've seen enough.

Right, well, I might not know much about comedy,

but I do know that there is absolutely

but I do know that there is absolutely

no way we can put any of that on television.

no way we can put any of that on television.

So, from here on in,

I'm going to be leaving the writing and performing

to you two, okay?

to you two, okay?

- You mean me and Laura.

He's an editor.

He doesn't write.

He doesn't write.

- Well, I could, but...

- Oh come on, Gemaine.

- Oh come on, Gemaine.

- Look, I mean, this whole thing's, obviously,

a lot harder than it first looks.

a lot harder than it first looks.

I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay?

I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay?

- Yeah, not too much though, right?

- That's why she's the comedian.

- That's why she's the comedian.

- [Rose] Seriously though.

Don't, don't come on set tomorrow.

Don't, don't come on set tomorrow.

- See ya!

See ya!

You don't think we could chuck that back on

You don't think we could chuck that back on

for another minute, do you?

Just...

- Sure.

- And then we can see what we're doing.

- And then we can see what we're doing.

- [Woman] Yeah.

- It's kind of thrilling seeing

- It's kind of thrilling seeing

yourself on screen, isn't it?

Sounding really, really good.

Keep the smile in your voice.

Keep the smile in your voice.

- Yeah, a little bit.

- And action!

Oh, there she is.

Okay, okay, cut!

Okay, okay, cut!

Oh, there she is again.

[laughs]

[laughs]

Do you have a girlfriend? - Yes.

- [Pauline] We're gonna go again.

We're gonna go again.

And action!

And action!

[soft clarinet music]

- [Woman] Thanks New Zealand On Air

for all that mum money.

Holla!

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