Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
3
00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:11,052
[eerie high-pitched ringing]
4
00:00:38,663 --> 00:00:39,706
[ringing stops]
5
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,088
[electronic music playing]
6
00:01:10,528 --> 00:01:13,031
♪ If you'd have told me ♪
7
00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:14,115
♪ A year ago ♪
8
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:17,702
♪ That I'd be locked inside of my home ♪
9
00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:18,787
♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪
10
00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:21,372
♪ I would have told you ♪
11
00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:22,665
♪ A year ago ♪
12
00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:26,669
♪ Interesting, now leave me alone ♪
13
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:30,215
♪ Sorry that I look like a mess ♪
14
00:01:30,298 --> 00:01:31,299
♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪
15
00:01:31,382 --> 00:01:35,220
♪ I booked a haircut
But it got rescheduled ♪
16
00:01:35,303 --> 00:01:38,348
♪ Robert's been a little depressed ♪
17
00:01:38,431 --> 00:01:39,682
♪ No! ♪
18
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:42,811
♪ And so today I'm gonna try just ♪
19
00:01:42,894 --> 00:01:44,896
♪ Getting up, sitting down ♪
20
00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:48,274
♪ Going back to work ♪
21
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:50,985
♪ Might not help
But still it couldn't hurt ♪
22
00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,113
♪ I'm sitting down, writing jokes ♪
23
00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:56,324
♪ Singing silly songs ♪
24
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,451
♪ I'm sorry I was gone ♪
25
00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:02,789
♪ But look, I made you some content ♪
26
00:02:02,872 --> 00:02:07,585
♪ Daddy made you your favorite
Open wide ♪
27
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:10,547
♪ Here comes the content ♪
28
00:02:11,214 --> 00:02:13,049
♪ It's a beautiful day ♪
29
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:16,886
♪ To stay inside ♪
30
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,808
[music ends]
31
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:30,108
[whimsical music playing]
32
00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:37,157
Camera test.
33
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,077
[sighs]
34
00:02:42,203 --> 00:02:44,205
[music continues]
35
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,214
[inaudible]
36
00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:58,303
[music continues]
37
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:46,643
[music fades]
38
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:08,289
♪ The world is changing ♪
39
00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:11,960
♪ The planet's heating up ♪
40
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:16,965
♪ What the fuck is going on? ♪
41
00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:19,092
[playing recorded laughter]
42
00:04:19,175 --> 00:04:21,636
♪ Rearranging ♪
43
00:04:21,719 --> 00:04:25,348
♪ It's like everything
Happened all at once ♪
44
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:29,686
♪ Um, what the fuck is going on? ♪
45
00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:31,562
[playing recorded laughter]
46
00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:34,983
♪ The people rising in the streets ♪
47
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,986
♪ The war, the drought ♪
48
00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:39,195
♪ The more I look ♪
49
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:44,450
♪ The more I see nothing to joke about ♪
50
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,035
♪ Is comedy over? ♪
51
00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:48,830
♪ Should I leave you alone? ♪
52
00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:50,915
♪ 'Cause really who's gonna go for ♪
53
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,626
♪ Joking at a time like this? ♪
54
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:56,462
♪ Should I be joking
At a time like this? ♪
55
00:04:56,546 --> 00:05:00,008
♪ I wanna help to leave this world ♪
56
00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:02,927
♪ Better than I found it ♪
57
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:06,222
♪ And I fear that comedy won't help ♪
58
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:09,475
♪ And the fear is not unfounded ♪
59
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:12,228
♪ Should I stop trying to be funny? ♪
60
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:15,773
♪ Should I give away my money? ♪
61
00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,066
♪ No! ♪ [gasps]
62
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,363
♪ What do I do? ♪
63
00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:25,867
[cries softly]
64
00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:28,328
-[dramatic music plays]
-[gasps]
65
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:33,624
[in ethereal voice]
♪ Healing the world with comedy ♪
66
00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:40,548
♪ The indescribable power of your comedy ♪
67
00:05:41,132 --> 00:05:44,260
♪ The world needs direction ♪
68
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,637
♪ From a white guy like me ♪
69
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:53,061
-[in deep voice] ♪ Bingo ♪
-♪ Who is healing the world with comedy ♪
70
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:56,272
That's it.
71
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,274
[inspirational music playing]
72
00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,860
The world is so fucked up.
73
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:03,529
Systematic oppression.
74
00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:05,823
Income inequality.
75
00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:08,451
The other stuff.
76
00:06:08,951 --> 00:06:09,952
[inhales deeply]
77
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:12,497
And there's only one thing
that I can do about it,
78
00:06:14,123 --> 00:06:17,210
while… while being paid,
and being the center of attention.
79
00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:23,299
♪ Healing the world with comedy ♪
80
00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:28,721
♪ Making a literal difference
Metaphorically ♪
81
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:31,516
♪ A Jew walks into a bar ♪
82
00:06:31,599 --> 00:06:34,602
♪ And I've saved him a seat ♪
83
00:06:34,685 --> 00:06:39,065
♪ That's healing the world with comedy ♪
84
00:06:39,148 --> 00:06:41,609
♪ I'm a special kind of white guy ♪
85
00:06:41,692 --> 00:06:44,487
♪ I self-reflected
And I want to be an agent of change ♪
86
00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:48,241
♪ So I am gonna use my privilege
For the good ♪
87
00:06:48,324 --> 00:06:49,575
♪ Very cool, way to go! ♪
88
00:06:50,159 --> 00:06:52,245
♪ American white guys ♪
89
00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:55,915
♪ We've had the floor
For at least 400 years ♪
90
00:06:55,998 --> 00:07:00,169
♪ So maybe I should just
Shut the fuck up… ♪
91
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,379
[music stops]
92
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,259
I'm bored.
93
00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:08,636
♪ I don't wanna do that ♪
94
00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:11,848
-♪ There's gotta be another way ♪
-♪ Yes ♪
95
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:15,726
♪ For me to help out
Without standing on the sidelines ♪
96
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:18,855
-♪ Never ♪
-♪ The wait is over ♪
97
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,649
♪ I'm white
And I'm here to save the day ♪
98
00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:26,237
♪ Lord help me channel
Sandra Bullock in The Blind Side ♪
99
00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:27,488
♪ Sandra Bullock! ♪
100
00:07:28,322 --> 00:07:32,702
♪ Healing the world with comedy ♪
101
00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:37,832
♪ Making a literal difference
Metaphorically ♪
102
00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:40,918
♪ And yes, most likely they'll pay me ♪
103
00:07:41,002 --> 00:07:43,546
♪ But I'd do it for free ♪
104
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:47,675
♪ I am healing the world with comedy ♪
105
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:52,805
♪ If you wake up in a house
That's full of smoke ♪
106
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:53,931
♪ Don't panic ♪
107
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,892
♪ Call me, and I'll tell you a joke ♪
108
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:58,519
♪ If you see white men
Dressed in white cloaks ♪
109
00:07:58,603 --> 00:07:59,604
♪ Don't panic ♪
110
00:07:59,687 --> 00:08:01,647
♪ Call me, and I'll tell you a joke ♪
111
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:03,191
♪ Oh shit ♪
112
00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,903
♪ Should I be joking
At a time like this? ♪
113
00:08:07,403 --> 00:08:09,947
♪ If you start to smell burning toast ♪
114
00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,617
♪ You're having a stroke
Or overcooking your toast ♪
115
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:15,369
♪ If you wake up in a house
That's full of smoke ♪
116
00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:18,331
♪ Don't panic
Call me, and I'll tell you a joke ♪
117
00:08:18,414 --> 00:08:21,125
♪ If you see white men
Dressed in white cloaks ♪
118
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:24,212
♪ Don't panic
Call me, and I'll tell you a joke ♪
119
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,380
♪ Oh shit ♪
120
00:08:26,464 --> 00:08:29,383
♪ Should I be joking
At a time like this? ♪
121
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:31,802
♪ Somebody help me out ♪
122
00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:34,222
♪ 'Cause I don't know ♪
123
00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:37,683
♪ And I want to help to leave this world ♪
124
00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:40,144
♪ Better than I found it ♪
125
00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:42,980
♪ And I fear that comedy won't help ♪
126
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:45,691
♪ And the fear is not unfounded ♪
127
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:48,069
♪ Should I stop trying to be funny? ♪
128
00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:51,030
♪ Should I give away my money? ♪
129
00:08:51,113 --> 00:08:52,114
♪ No! ♪
130
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:58,788
♪ I know what I gotta do ♪
131
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:03,084
♪ Healing the world with comedy ♪
132
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:08,506
♪ Making a literal difference
Metaphorically ♪
133
00:09:08,589 --> 00:09:11,092
♪ I swore I'd never be back ♪
134
00:09:11,175 --> 00:09:14,095
♪ But now I'm back on my feet ♪
135
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:18,683
♪ And I'm healing the world with comedy ♪
136
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,562
[birds chirping]
137
00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:34,782
[clicks tongue]
138
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:37,577
Hi.
139
00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:42,873
Welcome to, uh, whatever this is.
140
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:45,835
Um, I've been working
for the last couple months,
141
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:50,798
um, testing this camera,
and testing lights, and writing,
142
00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:56,095
and I've decided to, uh,
try to make a new special.
143
00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:57,263
For real.
144
00:09:57,346 --> 00:10:00,057
Um, it's not gonna be a normal special
145
00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,768
because there's no audience,
and there's no crew.
146
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,563
It's just me and my camera,
147
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:07,607
and you and your screen.
148
00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:11,319
Uh, the way that… that our Lord intended.
149
00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:13,362
Um…
150
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:17,658
And the whole special
will be… will be filmed in this, uh, room.
151
00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:20,661
And instead of being filmed
152
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:24,999
in a single night, it will be filmed in
153
00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:27,293
uh, however long it takes to finish.
154
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:29,378
[inhales deeply]
155
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,339
I hope you, uh, enjoy it.
156
00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:35,259
I… I hope this special
can maybe do for you
157
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,678
what it's done for me
these last couple months,
158
00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:42,808
which is, uh, to distract me from wanting
159
00:10:42,892 --> 00:10:45,603
to put a bullet into my head with a gun.
160
00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:47,772
[inhales deeply] So…
161
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:49,815
Yeah, thank you.
162
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:52,151
And a warning.
163
00:10:52,234 --> 00:10:55,988
Um, I can already sort of tell
that this special is going to be
164
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:58,449
a little all over the place,
165
00:10:58,532 --> 00:11:02,536
so don't expect
incredibly smooth transiti--
166
00:11:03,537 --> 00:11:05,539
[electronic music playing]
167
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:20,888
[music continues]
168
00:11:34,485 --> 00:11:37,071
♪ Pour me a drink and clear my schedule ♪
169
00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:40,282
♪ I'mma FaceTime with my mom tonight ♪
170
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:42,076
[echoing] ♪ Tonight ♪
171
00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:44,787
♪ These 40 minutes are essential ♪
172
00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,832
♪ I'mma FaceTime with my mom tonight ♪
173
00:11:47,915 --> 00:11:49,750
[echoing] ♪ Tonight ♪
174
00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:55,464
♪ I call, she answers
And her hair is wet ♪
175
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,466
♪ Hair is wet ♪
176
00:11:57,550 --> 00:12:00,511
♪ I say, "Did you just shower?"
177
00:12:00,594 --> 00:12:02,221
♪ She says, "How'd you guess?" ♪
178
00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:05,266
♪ I say, "Your hair is wet"
She says, "Oh yeah" ♪
179
00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:07,810
♪ I tell my boys I need some space, yeah ♪
180
00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:10,646
♪ I'mma FaceTime with my mom tonight ♪
181
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:14,942
♪ She'll hold her iPhone 5
No further than six inches from her face ♪
182
00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:18,571
♪ Yeah, I'mma FaceTime
With my mom tonight ♪
183
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:20,364
[echoing] ♪ Tonight ♪
184
00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:23,284
♪ She says, "Oh, look who's here" ♪
185
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:25,411
♪ Say hi to Dad ♪
186
00:12:25,494 --> 00:12:26,495
[inaudible]
187
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,164
♪ Hi to Dad ♪
188
00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:31,041
♪ He says, "How ya doing, bud?"
189
00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:33,002
♪ I say, "I'm not so bad" ♪
190
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,588
♪ And that's the deepest talk
We've ever had ♪
191
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:38,257
♪ Watching as she looks for her glasses ♪
192
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:41,385
♪ I'mma FaceTime with my mom tonight ♪
193
00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:43,012
♪ She'll tell me all about ♪
194
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:46,557
♪ The season six finale of The Blacklist ♪
195
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:49,310
♪ I'mma FaceTime with my mom tonight ♪
196
00:12:49,393 --> 00:12:50,853
[echoing] ♪ Tonight ♪
197
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:55,274
♪ My mother's covering
Her camera with her thumb ♪
198
00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:59,069
♪ I'll waste my time
FaceTiming with my mom ♪
199
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:02,948
♪ My mother's covering
Her camera with her thumb ♪
200
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:06,827
♪ I'll waste my time
FaceTiming with my mom ♪
201
00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:10,790
♪ My mother's covering
Her camera with her thumb ♪
202
00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:14,627
♪ I'll waste my time
FaceTiming with my mom ♪
203
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:18,297
♪ My mother's covering
Her camera with her thumb ♪
204
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:22,259
♪ I'll waste my time
FaceTiming with my mom ♪
205
00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:45,491
[airplane engine roaring]
206
00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:03,384
[sighs]
207
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:05,511
[playing upbeat music]
208
00:14:05,594 --> 00:14:06,846
Hey, kids.
209
00:14:06,929 --> 00:14:09,098
Today, we're gonna learn about the world.
210
00:14:12,434 --> 00:14:14,186
♪ The world that's around us ♪
211
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:16,063
♪ Is pretty amazing ♪
212
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:17,439
♪ But how does it work? ♪
213
00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:19,733
♪ It must be complicated ♪
214
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:23,404
♪ The secret is the world can only work ♪
215
00:14:23,487 --> 00:14:26,657
♪ When everything works together ♪
216
00:14:26,740 --> 00:14:28,993
♪ A bee drinks from a flower ♪
217
00:14:29,076 --> 00:14:30,828
♪ And leaves with its pollen ♪
218
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:34,665
♪ A squirrel in a tree
Spreads the seeds that have fallen ♪
219
00:14:34,748 --> 00:14:37,751
♪ Everything works together ♪
220
00:14:37,835 --> 00:14:41,422
♪ The biggest elephant, the littlest fly ♪
221
00:14:41,505 --> 00:14:44,383
♪ The gophers underground
The birds in the sky ♪
222
00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:48,512
♪ And every single cricket
Every fish in the sea ♪
223
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:52,224
♪ Gives what they can
And gets what they need ♪
224
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:56,812
♪ That is how the world works ♪
225
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:59,857
♪ That is how the world works ♪
226
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:03,319
♪ From A to Zebra
To the worms in the dirt ♪
227
00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,488
♪ That's how ♪
228
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:07,823
♪ It works ♪
229
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:11,619
Hey, everyone.
Look who stopped by to say hello.
230
00:15:12,369 --> 00:15:13,662
It's Socko.
231
00:15:14,204 --> 00:15:15,748
Hey!
232
00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:17,666
Where you been, Socko? [chuckles]
233
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:22,004
I've been where I always am
when you're not wearing me on your hand.
234
00:15:22,087 --> 00:15:26,258
In a frightening,
liminal space between states of being.
235
00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:28,761
Not quite dead, not quite alive.
236
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:32,640
It's similar to a constant state
of sleep paralysis.
237
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:36,268
Socko, we were just talking
about the world and how it works.
238
00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:38,771
Boy, that sounds complicated.
239
00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:41,690
Do you have anything you'd want
to teach us about the world?
240
00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:45,444
I wouldn't say anything that you probably
haven't already said yourself.
241
00:15:45,527 --> 00:15:47,446
I don't know about that, Socko.
242
00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:48,948
How about you give it a try?
243
00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:51,533
All right.
244
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:55,329
♪ The simple narrative taught
In every history class ♪
245
00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:59,625
♪ Is demonstrably false
And pedagogically classist ♪
246
00:15:59,708 --> 00:16:03,379
♪ Don't you know
The world is built with blood ♪
247
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:05,881
♪ And genocide and exploitation ♪
248
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:10,511
♪ The global network of capital
Essentially functions ♪
249
00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:13,806
♪ To separate the worker
From the means of production ♪
250
00:16:13,889 --> 00:16:17,518
♪ And the FBI killed Martin Luther King ♪
251
00:16:17,601 --> 00:16:20,646
♪ Private property's inherently theft ♪
252
00:16:20,729 --> 00:16:24,066
♪ And neoliberal fascists
Are destroying the left ♪
253
00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:25,943
♪ And every politician ♪
254
00:16:26,026 --> 00:16:27,611
♪ Every cop on the street ♪
255
00:16:27,695 --> 00:16:31,657
♪ Protects the interests
Of the pedophilic corporate elite ♪
256
00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:35,202
♪ That is how the world works… ♪
257
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:36,495
Really?
258
00:16:36,578 --> 00:16:39,289
♪ That is how the world works ♪
259
00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:42,960
♪ Genocide
The Natives say you got to it first ♪
260
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:46,046
♪ That's how ♪
261
00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:47,131
♪ It works ♪
262
00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:49,341
That's pretty intense. [laughs]
263
00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:50,843
No shit.
264
00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:53,345
What can I do to help?
265
00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:55,806
Read a book or something. I don't know.
266
00:16:55,889 --> 00:16:59,643
Just don't burden me
with the responsibility of educating you.
267
00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:01,478
It's incredibly exhausting.
268
00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:02,688
I'm sorry, Socko.
269
00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:05,524
I was just trying
to become a better person.
270
00:17:05,607 --> 00:17:07,943
Why do you rich fucking white people
271
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:11,196
insist on seeing
every socio-political conflict
272
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:15,075
through the myopic lens
of your own self-actualization?
273
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:16,952
This isn't about you.
274
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,205
So either get with it,
or get out of the fucking way.
275
00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:24,293
Watch your mouth, buddy. [chuckles]
Remember who's on whose hand here.
276
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:27,171
But that's what I--
Have you not been fucking listening?
277
00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:28,797
-We are entrenched in--
-All right.
278
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:30,883
Wait! No, please!
I don't want to go back. [whimpers]
279
00:17:30,966 --> 00:17:32,134
[choking]
280
00:17:32,217 --> 00:17:34,219
I can't go… I can't go back.
281
00:17:34,303 --> 00:17:35,971
Please. Please.
282
00:17:36,513 --> 00:17:37,514
I'm sorry.
283
00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:40,559
Are you gonna behave yourself?
284
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,561
Yes.
285
00:17:43,854 --> 00:17:45,773
Yes, what?
286
00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:49,276
-Yes, sir.
-Look at me.
287
00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:54,198
[slowly] Yes, sir.
288
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:55,783
That's better.
289
00:17:56,909 --> 00:18:01,413
♪ That is how the world works ♪
290
00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:04,083
♪ That is how the world works ♪
291
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:05,959
♪ I hope you learned your lesson ♪
292
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:07,878
♪ I did and it hurt! ♪
293
00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:11,173
♪ That's how ♪
294
00:18:11,715 --> 00:18:15,094
[slowly] ♪ It works ♪
295
00:18:17,596 --> 00:18:18,972
[screaming] No!
296
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:25,145
[exhales]
297
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,106
Hello, my name is Bo Burnham.
298
00:18:27,689 --> 00:18:30,067
And I am a former comedian,
299
00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:33,904
turned social brand consultant.
300
00:18:33,987 --> 00:18:35,989
[inspirational music playing]
301
00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:40,202
It's a very exciting time to be a,
uh, brand.
302
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:45,582
It's also a bit of a scary time
because customers expect a lot more
303
00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:48,043
from their brands
than they did in the past.
304
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:50,838
During this incredibly necessary
305
00:18:50,921 --> 00:18:54,299
and overdue social reckoning
that we're having in our culture,
306
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:59,346
it is no longer acceptable for brands
to stay out of the conversation.
307
00:18:59,429 --> 00:19:03,142
Consumers want to know, "Are you willing
to use your brand awareness
308
00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:05,477
to effect positive social change?"
309
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,438
Which will create more brand awareness.
310
00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:13,944
The question I ask the brands I work with
is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is…
311
00:19:14,027 --> 00:19:16,196
"Are you gonna be
on the right side of history?"
312
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,657
The question isn't,
"What are you selling?"
313
00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:21,493
Or… or "What service are you providing?"
314
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:24,580
The question is, "What do you stand for?"
315
00:19:25,789 --> 00:19:28,876
Who are you, Bagel Bites?
316
00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:31,044
All these big companies, they're so scared
317
00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:34,590
of all this social change, and I come in
and I put their fears to rest.
318
00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:36,758
You know, I tell them, "Just be honest."
319
00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:41,138
"Tell your customers
that… that JPMorgan is against racism."
320
00:19:41,221 --> 00:19:42,222
In theory.
321
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:43,891
The question is no longer,
322
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:48,395
"Do you want to buy Wheat Thins?"
For example.
323
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,063
The question is now,
324
00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:55,777
"Will you support Wheat Thins
in the fight against Lyme disease?"
325
00:19:55,861 --> 00:19:58,238
There's no sugarcoating it. The world is…
326
00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:01,283
fucked up.
327
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:07,247
And you've got a choice as a brand.
You can…
328
00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:12,502
hide and bury your head in the sand
and hope it fixes itself,
329
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:17,299
or you can roll up your sleeves
and get to work,
330
00:20:19,509 --> 00:20:21,011
and sell Butterfingers.
331
00:20:24,431 --> 00:20:26,433
[piano playing]
332
00:20:32,105 --> 00:20:34,900
♪ An open window ♪
333
00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:38,487
♪ A novel ♪
334
00:20:38,570 --> 00:20:41,198
♪ A couple holding hands ♪
335
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:48,247
♪ An avocado ♪
336
00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:50,749
♪ A poem ♪
337
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:56,713
♪ Written in the sand ♪
338
00:20:56,797 --> 00:21:00,092
♪ Fresh fallen snow on the ground ♪
339
00:21:00,175 --> 00:21:03,011
♪ A golden retriever in a flower crown ♪
340
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:07,683
♪ Is this heaven ♪
341
00:21:08,183 --> 00:21:12,854
♪ Or is it just a white woman ♪
342
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,399
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
343
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:19,319
♪ White woman ♪
344
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:22,656
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
345
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:25,701
♪ White woman ♪
346
00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:28,245
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
347
00:21:29,162 --> 00:21:32,082
♪ White woman ♪
348
00:21:32,165 --> 00:21:34,459
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
349
00:21:37,754 --> 00:21:40,007
♪ Latte foam art ♪
350
00:21:41,550 --> 00:21:43,218
♪ Tiny pumpkins ♪
351
00:21:44,344 --> 00:21:46,596
♪ Fuzzy, comfy socks ♪
352
00:21:49,933 --> 00:21:52,269
♪ Coffee table made out of driftwood ♪
353
00:21:52,936 --> 00:21:56,106
♪ A bobblehead of Ruth Bader Ginsburg ♪
354
00:21:56,982 --> 00:22:01,778
♪ A needlepoint of a fox ♪
355
00:22:01,862 --> 00:22:05,490
♪ Some random quote
From Lord of the Rings ♪
356
00:22:05,574 --> 00:22:08,827
♪ Incorrectly attributed
To Martin Luther King ♪
357
00:22:08,910 --> 00:22:12,914
♪ Is this heaven ♪
358
00:22:12,998 --> 00:22:18,462
♪ Or am I looking at a white woman ♪
359
00:22:18,545 --> 00:22:20,714
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
360
00:22:20,797 --> 00:22:24,885
♪ White woman ♪
361
00:22:24,968 --> 00:22:28,263
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
362
00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:31,266
♪ White woman ♪
363
00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:34,394
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
364
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:37,564
♪ White woman ♪
365
00:22:37,647 --> 00:22:40,442
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
366
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:44,654
♪ Her favorite photo of her mom ♪
367
00:22:45,781 --> 00:22:48,158
♪ The caption says ♪
368
00:22:48,241 --> 00:22:50,577
♪ I can't believe it ♪
369
00:22:50,660 --> 00:22:55,457
♪ It's been a decade
Since you've been gone ♪
370
00:22:55,540 --> 00:22:56,708
♪ Momma, I miss you ♪
371
00:22:56,792 --> 00:22:59,795
♪ I miss sitting with you
In the front yard ♪
372
00:22:59,878 --> 00:23:03,298
♪ Still figuring out
How to keep living without you ♪
373
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:06,176
♪ It's got a little better
But it's still hard ♪
374
00:23:06,259 --> 00:23:09,513
♪ Momma, I got a job I love
And my own apartment ♪
375
00:23:09,596 --> 00:23:12,641
♪ Momma, I got a boyfriend
And I'm crazy about him ♪
376
00:23:12,724 --> 00:23:15,727
♪ Your little girl didn't do too bad ♪
377
00:23:15,811 --> 00:23:19,231
♪ Momma, I love you
Give a hug and kiss to Dad ♪
378
00:23:20,190 --> 00:23:23,276
♪ A goat-cheese salad ♪
379
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:26,530
♪ A backlit hammock ♪
380
00:23:26,613 --> 00:23:31,284
♪ A simple glass of wine ♪
381
00:23:31,368 --> 00:23:35,288
♪ Incredibly derivative
Political street art ♪
382
00:23:35,372 --> 00:23:38,542
♪ A dreamcatcher
Bought from Urban Outfitters ♪
383
00:23:39,042 --> 00:23:44,589
♪ A vintage neon sign ♪
384
00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:47,884
♪ Three little words, a couple of doves ♪
385
00:23:47,968 --> 00:23:51,346
♪ And a ring on her finger
From the person that she loves ♪
386
00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:55,267
♪ Is this heaven ♪
387
00:23:56,143 --> 00:24:00,856
♪ Or is it just a white woman ♪
388
00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:03,150
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
389
00:24:03,233 --> 00:24:07,446
♪ White woman ♪
390
00:24:07,529 --> 00:24:10,657
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
391
00:24:10,740 --> 00:24:13,702
♪ White woman ♪
392
00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:17,038
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
393
00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:20,125
♪ White woman ♪
394
00:24:20,208 --> 00:24:22,711
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
395
00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:29,801
[playing on laptop]
♪ White woman ♪
396
00:24:29,885 --> 00:24:32,512
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
397
00:24:32,596 --> 00:24:36,391
♪ White woman ♪
398
00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:39,603
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
399
00:24:39,686 --> 00:24:42,814
♪ White woman ♪
400
00:24:42,898 --> 00:24:46,026
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
401
00:24:46,109 --> 00:24:49,237
♪ White woman ♪
402
00:24:49,321 --> 00:24:51,281
♪ A white woman's Instagram ♪
403
00:24:51,364 --> 00:24:53,325
[birds calling]
404
00:24:56,703 --> 00:24:58,788
[Bo] Here's a question for you guys. Um…
405
00:24:58,872 --> 00:25:01,958
Is it… is it necessary?
406
00:25:02,042 --> 00:25:07,339
Is it necessary
that every single person on this planet
407
00:25:08,256 --> 00:25:13,428
um, expresses every single opinion
that they have
408
00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:16,556
on every single thing that occurs
409
00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:18,683
all at the same time?
410
00:25:18,767 --> 00:25:22,020
Is that… is that necessary?
411
00:25:22,729 --> 00:25:23,730
Um…
412
00:25:24,272 --> 00:25:26,358
Or to ask in a slightly different way,
413
00:25:26,441 --> 00:25:29,569
um, can… can anyone
414
00:25:31,238 --> 00:25:32,322
shut the fuck up?
415
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:35,116
Can… can anyone,
416
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:37,285
any… any…
417
00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:40,539
any one, any single one,
418
00:25:40,622 --> 00:25:42,123
can any one…
419
00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:43,667
[inhales deeply]
420
00:25:43,750 --> 00:25:46,336
…shut the fuck up about anything--
421
00:25:46,419 --> 00:25:48,713
About any… any single thing?
422
00:25:48,797 --> 00:25:51,091
Can any single person
423
00:25:51,174 --> 00:25:54,928
shut the fuck up about any single thing
424
00:25:55,428 --> 00:25:57,389
for an hour?
425
00:25:57,973 --> 00:26:00,392
You know, is that… is that possible?
426
00:26:01,726 --> 00:26:02,852
[clicks tongue]
427
00:26:03,562 --> 00:26:05,480
[gasps] And I know you're thinking,
428
00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,732
"You're not shutting
the fuck up right now,"
429
00:26:07,816 --> 00:26:09,192
and that's true, but…
430
00:26:10,902 --> 00:26:13,655
♪ Who needs a coffee
'Cause I'm doing a run ♪
431
00:26:13,738 --> 00:26:16,408
♪ I'm writing down the orders now
For everyone ♪
432
00:26:16,491 --> 00:26:19,119
♪ The coffee is free, just like me ♪
433
00:26:19,202 --> 00:26:21,162
♪ I'm an unpaid intern ♪
434
00:26:22,497 --> 00:26:24,958
♪ Sorting papers, running around ♪
435
00:26:25,041 --> 00:26:27,877
♪ Sitting in the meeting
I'm not making a sound ♪
436
00:26:27,961 --> 00:26:30,630
♪ Barely people, somehow legal ♪
437
00:26:30,714 --> 00:26:32,424
♪ Unpaid intern ♪
438
00:26:33,425 --> 00:26:35,844
♪ You work all day, go back to your dorm ♪
439
00:26:35,927 --> 00:26:38,722
♪ And since you can't afford a mortgage
You just torrent a porn ♪
440
00:26:38,805 --> 00:26:40,515
♪ 'Cause you're an intern ♪
441
00:26:40,599 --> 00:26:42,017
[in deep voice] ♪ Unpaid ♪
442
00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:43,560
[scatting]
443
00:26:43,643 --> 00:26:44,728
Hey, everybody.
444
00:26:44,811 --> 00:26:49,441
Um, I thought I'd do a reaction video
to the song that you just saw me perform.
445
00:26:49,524 --> 00:26:50,859
Thought that might be fun.
446
00:26:50,942 --> 00:26:55,780
Um, so I got my laptop all set up.
So I'm ready to go, and let's go.
447
00:26:56,740 --> 00:26:59,492
♪ Who needs a coffee
'Cause I'm doing a run… ♪
448
00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:01,453
[chuckles] I like this song.
449
00:27:02,078 --> 00:27:06,207
Um, so the idea with this song
was basically that there's so many songs
450
00:27:06,291 --> 00:27:08,501
in the past about…
about working-class jobs,
451
00:27:08,585 --> 00:27:12,380
but not a lot about the labor exploitation
of the modern world,
452
00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:13,798
so that was the idea here.
453
00:27:13,882 --> 00:27:15,925
♪ Barely people, somehow legal… ♪
454
00:27:16,009 --> 00:27:20,180
My beard is a little shorter in this video
'cause I filmed it a couple weeks ago.
455
00:27:20,263 --> 00:27:21,640
♪ Go back to your dorm ♪
456
00:27:21,723 --> 00:27:23,767
♪ And since you can't afford a mortgage
You just… ♪
457
00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:26,394
I think it holds up.
The song, not the beard. [laughs]
458
00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:27,812
[in deep voice] ♪ Unpaid ♪
459
00:27:27,896 --> 00:27:29,022
[scatting]
460
00:27:29,105 --> 00:27:31,650
And then you cut.
I think it's funny to cut right on--
461
00:27:31,733 --> 00:27:35,070
…do a reaction video
to the song that you just saw me perform.
462
00:27:35,153 --> 00:27:36,696
-Thought that might be fun.
-What…
463
00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:38,448
Um, so I got my…
464
00:27:38,531 --> 00:27:40,742
Because this video played after that.
465
00:27:40,825 --> 00:27:43,370
Right. So, and now… Right.
466
00:27:43,453 --> 00:27:44,996
Okay, so I'll just keep reacting.
467
00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:48,667
So, this is me reacting to the song.
468
00:27:49,584 --> 00:27:50,752
Um…
469
00:27:50,835 --> 00:27:53,505
What I'm doing is I'm explaining
what the song means.
470
00:27:53,588 --> 00:27:56,466
Um, and what it's about.
I'm being a little pretentious.
471
00:27:56,549 --> 00:28:00,011
It's, uh… it's an instinct I have
where I need everything that I write
472
00:28:00,095 --> 00:28:02,180
to have some deeper meaning or something.
473
00:28:02,263 --> 00:28:05,684
But it's a stupid song,
and, uh, it doesn't really mean anything,
474
00:28:05,767 --> 00:28:09,145
and, uh, it's… it's pretty unlikable
that I… that I feel this need,
475
00:28:09,229 --> 00:28:13,441
this desperate need,
to be seen as intelligent.
476
00:28:13,525 --> 00:28:16,069
And the video's ending here,
as you can see,
477
00:28:16,152 --> 00:28:19,531
and look, I'm very confused.
See, I'm very, very confused.
478
00:28:19,614 --> 00:28:22,117
'Cause I'm staring at myself,
I don't know what I'm looking at,
479
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:26,538
and I'm starting to catch up now,
and realizing what's going on.
480
00:28:26,621 --> 00:28:29,499
And, uh, yeah, now I'm deciding to react
481
00:28:29,582 --> 00:28:32,335
to the reaction to the video.
482
00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:36,423
So here, um, I'm reacting
to my own reacting,
483
00:28:36,506 --> 00:28:41,094
and I'm criticizing my initial reaction
for… for being pretentious,
484
00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:44,556
which is… which is honestly,
it's a… it's a defense mechanism.
485
00:28:44,639 --> 00:28:47,767
I'm… I'm so worried
that criticism will be levied against me
486
00:28:47,851 --> 00:28:50,562
that I levy it against myself
before anyone else can.
487
00:28:50,645 --> 00:28:53,690
And I think that, "Oh, if I'm self-aware
about being a douchebag,
488
00:28:53,773 --> 00:28:57,110
it'll somehow make me less
of a douchebag." But it… but it doesn't.
489
00:28:57,193 --> 00:28:59,946
Um, self-awareness does not absolve
anybody of anything.
490
00:29:00,029 --> 00:29:02,490
Am I balding?
This is really, really disturbing.
491
00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:06,536
I don't like looking at myself like this,
and I want… I want this to stop.
492
00:29:06,619 --> 00:29:09,330
Okay, I want this to stop.
I'm… I'm stopping this.
493
00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:12,625
So, yeah,
that was, uh, my reaction to the song,
494
00:29:12,709 --> 00:29:14,252
and I hope you enjoyed it.
495
00:29:15,462 --> 00:29:17,464
[electronic music playing]
496
00:29:23,636 --> 00:29:25,722
♪ CEO, entrepreneur ♪
497
00:29:25,805 --> 00:29:27,849
♪ Born in 1964 ♪
498
00:29:27,932 --> 00:29:29,350
♪ Jeffrey ♪
499
00:29:29,434 --> 00:29:31,936
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
500
00:29:32,020 --> 00:29:34,063
♪ CEO, entrepreneur ♪
501
00:29:34,147 --> 00:29:36,149
♪ Born in 1964 ♪
502
00:29:36,232 --> 00:29:37,650
♪ Jeffrey ♪
503
00:29:37,734 --> 00:29:40,320
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
504
00:29:40,403 --> 00:29:42,405
♪ Come on, Jeffrey, you can do it ♪
505
00:29:42,489 --> 00:29:44,491
♪ Pave the way, put your back into it ♪
506
00:29:44,574 --> 00:29:46,618
♪ Tell us why
Show us how ♪
507
00:29:46,701 --> 00:29:48,787
♪ Look at where you came from
Look at you now ♪
508
00:29:48,870 --> 00:29:50,789
♪ Zuckerberg and Gates and Buffet ♪
509
00:29:50,872 --> 00:29:52,832
♪ Amateurs can fucking suck it ♪
510
00:29:52,916 --> 00:29:55,001
♪ Fuck their wives, drink their blood ♪
511
00:29:55,084 --> 00:29:56,711
♪ Come on, Jeff, get 'em! ♪
512
00:29:56,795 --> 00:29:58,797
[playing electronic music]
513
00:30:10,892 --> 00:30:11,893
[screams]
514
00:30:11,976 --> 00:30:13,394
I don't know about you guys,
515
00:30:13,478 --> 00:30:16,689
but, um, you know,
I've been thinking recently that…
516
00:30:17,857 --> 00:30:21,277
that you know, maybe, um, allowing
517
00:30:22,028 --> 00:30:25,156
giant digital media corporations to
518
00:30:25,949 --> 00:30:29,452
exploit the neurochemical drama
519
00:30:29,536 --> 00:30:31,704
of our children for profit…
520
00:30:33,498 --> 00:30:35,708
You know, maybe that was, uh…
521
00:30:37,168 --> 00:30:38,461
a bad call
522
00:30:39,295 --> 00:30:40,296
by us.
523
00:30:43,341 --> 00:30:44,717
Maybe…
524
00:30:44,801 --> 00:30:49,764
maybe the… the flattening of the entire
subjective human experience
525
00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:54,811
into a… lifeless exchange of value
526
00:30:54,894 --> 00:30:56,521
that benefits nobody,
527
00:30:57,522 --> 00:31:00,024
except for, um, you know,
528
00:31:00,817 --> 00:31:05,071
a handful of bug-eyed salamanders
in Silicon Valley…
529
00:31:05,154 --> 00:31:10,118
Maybe that as a… as a way of life forever…
530
00:31:12,537 --> 00:31:16,332
maybe that's, um, not good.
531
00:31:16,416 --> 00:31:18,293
[birds calling]
532
00:31:18,376 --> 00:31:19,919
[exhales]
533
00:31:23,464 --> 00:31:24,465
I'm…
534
00:31:26,718 --> 00:31:27,719
horny.
535
00:31:30,430 --> 00:31:34,726
Sexting
536
00:31:34,809 --> 00:31:38,271
♪ It isn't sex
It's the next best thing ♪
537
00:31:38,354 --> 00:31:42,942
♪ Sexting ♪
538
00:31:43,026 --> 00:31:44,652
♪ Aye, aye ♪
539
00:31:45,403 --> 00:31:46,696
♪ AT&T ♪
540
00:31:46,779 --> 00:31:47,780
♪ I am in bed ♪
541
00:31:47,864 --> 00:31:50,700
♪ I am ready to go with you ♪
542
00:31:50,783 --> 00:31:53,828
♪ Tonight I'm thinking of taking it slow ♪
543
00:31:53,912 --> 00:31:56,456
♪ We'll use emojis only ♪
544
00:31:56,539 --> 00:31:59,334
♪ We don't need phonetical diction ♪
545
00:31:59,417 --> 00:32:03,379
♪ We'll talk dirty
Like we're ancient Egyptians ♪
546
00:32:03,463 --> 00:32:05,465
♪ You send me a peach ♪
547
00:32:05,548 --> 00:32:07,550
♪ I send a carrot back ♪
548
00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:09,510
♪ You send a Ferris wheel ♪
549
00:32:09,594 --> 00:32:11,220
♪ That's pretty abstract ♪
550
00:32:11,304 --> 00:32:13,348
♪ I send back a ticket stub ♪
551
00:32:13,431 --> 00:32:16,059
♪ Implying that
The Ferris wheel's your body ♪
552
00:32:16,142 --> 00:32:19,020
♪ And I'd really love admission to it ♪
553
00:32:19,103 --> 00:32:20,438
♪ Oh no! ♪
554
00:32:20,521 --> 00:32:22,982
♪ What if now you think
That I'm implying ♪
555
00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:26,402
♪ Your vagina
Is as big as a Ferris wheel? ♪
556
00:32:26,486 --> 00:32:27,487
♪ Damn ♪
557
00:32:27,570 --> 00:32:30,281
♪ You send back a snowman ♪
558
00:32:31,491 --> 00:32:33,785
♪ Crisis averted ♪
559
00:32:33,868 --> 00:32:38,706
-♪ Thank God ♪
-♪ Sexting ♪
560
00:32:38,790 --> 00:32:42,418
♪ It isn't sex
It's the next best thing ♪
561
00:32:42,502 --> 00:32:46,923
♪ Sexting ♪
562
00:32:47,006 --> 00:32:48,716
♪ Aye, aye ♪
563
00:32:49,509 --> 00:32:50,635
♪ AT&T ♪
564
00:32:50,718 --> 00:32:54,222
♪ No more emojis, now it's on to words ♪
565
00:32:54,305 --> 00:32:58,184
♪ I ask what you're wearing
You reply, "A shirt" ♪
566
00:32:58,267 --> 00:33:00,228
♪ You say, "Are you naked?" ♪
567
00:33:00,311 --> 00:33:03,189
♪ I say, "Yeah, except for a top hat" ♪
568
00:33:03,272 --> 00:33:06,359
♪ You say, ""lmao." But I doubt that
569
00:33:06,442 --> 00:33:10,530
♪ I'm getting hot at just the thought
Of what I'd do to you ♪
570
00:33:10,613 --> 00:33:14,367
♪ 'Cause in my head I'm in your bed
And getting through to you ♪
571
00:33:14,450 --> 00:33:18,496
♪ They made the Internet
For nights like these ♪
572
00:33:18,579 --> 00:33:22,375
♪ I love you, baby
Send a picture of your tits, please ♪
573
00:33:22,458 --> 00:33:26,754
-♪ Sexting ♪
-♪ Whoa ♪
574
00:33:26,838 --> 00:33:30,425
♪ It isn't sex
It's the next best thing ♪
575
00:33:30,508 --> 00:33:34,512
♪ Sexting ♪
576
00:33:34,595 --> 00:33:37,306
-♪ We are sexting ♪
-♪ Aye, aye ♪
577
00:33:37,390 --> 00:33:38,349
♪ AT&T ♪
578
00:33:38,433 --> 00:33:42,145
♪ You send the pic
And say it's now my turn ♪
579
00:33:42,228 --> 00:33:46,441
♪ Jesus fucking Christ
I guess I never learn ♪
580
00:33:46,524 --> 00:33:49,986
♪ My phone's flash is my only light ♪
581
00:33:50,069 --> 00:33:54,574
♪ And the flash
Makes my dick look frightened ♪
582
00:33:54,657 --> 00:33:58,494
♪ I chicken out
And send a picture of my face instead ♪
583
00:33:58,578 --> 00:34:02,790
♪ Because my dick looks like
The baby from Eraserhead ♪
584
00:34:02,874 --> 00:34:06,836
♪ You say, "I sent my titties
That's not fair" ♪
585
00:34:06,919 --> 00:34:11,007
♪ So I send it to you
And then my phone dies ♪
586
00:34:11,090 --> 00:34:13,301
♪ Another night on my own, yeah ♪
587
00:34:13,384 --> 00:34:15,303
♪ Stuck in my home, yeah ♪
588
00:34:15,386 --> 00:34:18,806
♪ Sitting alone, one hand on my dick
And one hand on my phone, yeah ♪
589
00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:20,892
♪ Another night on my own, yeah ♪
590
00:34:21,434 --> 00:34:23,311
♪ Stuck in my home, yeah ♪
591
00:34:23,394 --> 00:34:26,939
♪ Sitting alone, one hand on my dick
And one hand on my phone, yeah ♪
592
00:34:27,023 --> 00:34:28,900
♪ Another night on my own, yeah ♪
593
00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:31,235
♪ Stuck in my home, yeah ♪
594
00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:33,029
♪ Sitting alone, one hand on my dick ♪
595
00:34:33,112 --> 00:34:34,864
-♪ And one hand on my phone, yeah ♪
-♪ Pussy ♪
596
00:34:34,947 --> 00:34:36,908
-♪ Another night on my own, yeah ♪
-♪ Titties ♪
597
00:34:36,991 --> 00:34:38,868
-♪ Stuck in my home, yeah ♪
-♪ Balls ♪
598
00:34:38,951 --> 00:34:42,872
♪ Sitting alone, one hand on my dick
And one hand on my phone, yeah ♪
599
00:34:48,127 --> 00:34:49,212
Hey, everybody.
600
00:34:49,295 --> 00:34:52,799
Um, I just wanted to make
a really quick video to say thank you.
601
00:34:53,382 --> 00:34:55,802
-[happy music playing]
-Thank you for watching my content.
602
00:34:55,885 --> 00:34:56,969
As you guys know,
603
00:34:57,053 --> 00:34:59,931
I work really hard
to try to bring you guys
604
00:35:00,014 --> 00:35:03,017
high-quality content
that I think you'll enjoy.
605
00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:06,479
So the fact that you are enjoying it,
means everything to me.
606
00:35:06,562 --> 00:35:09,148
So thank you, and also keep watching,
607
00:35:09,232 --> 00:35:12,401
'cause there's a lot more content
where that came from. [laughs]
608
00:35:12,485 --> 00:35:14,320
All right, guys, see you later.
609
00:35:19,283 --> 00:35:20,493
[music fading]
610
00:35:24,163 --> 00:35:25,289
[music ends]
611
00:35:32,463 --> 00:35:36,134
♪ Trying to be funny and stuck in a room ♪
612
00:35:37,552 --> 00:35:41,389
♪ There isn't much more to say about it ♪
613
00:35:41,472 --> 00:35:45,059
♪ Can one be funny when stuck in a room? ♪
614
00:35:46,310 --> 00:35:48,521
[clears throat]
I took a big fucking breath.
615
00:35:49,397 --> 00:35:50,481
[inhales deeply]
616
00:35:51,274 --> 00:35:54,861
♪ Trying to be funny and stuck in a room ♪
617
00:35:56,362 --> 00:36:00,199
♪ There isn't much more to say about it ♪
618
00:36:00,283 --> 00:36:03,870
♪ Can one be funny when stuck in a room? ♪
619
00:36:05,538 --> 00:36:09,208
♪ Being in
Trying to get something out of it ♪
620
00:36:09,292 --> 00:36:11,961
♪ Try making faces ♪
621
00:36:12,587 --> 00:36:14,130
♪ Try telling jokes ♪
622
00:36:14,213 --> 00:36:16,966
♪ Making little sounds ♪
623
00:36:17,049 --> 00:36:18,134
[making sounds]
624
00:36:18,217 --> 00:36:22,305
♪ I was a kid who was stuck in his room ♪
625
00:36:23,306 --> 00:36:27,143
♪ There isn't much more to say about it ♪
626
00:36:27,226 --> 00:36:31,355
♪ When you're a kid
And you're stuck in your room ♪
627
00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:36,194
♪ You'll do any old shit
To get out of it ♪
628
00:36:36,277 --> 00:36:39,530
♪ Try making faces ♪
629
00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:41,115
♪ Try telling jokes ♪
630
00:36:41,199 --> 00:36:45,161
♪ Making little sounds ♪
631
00:36:45,244 --> 00:36:47,371
♪ Well, well ♪
632
00:36:47,455 --> 00:36:49,665
♪ Look who's inside again ♪
633
00:36:49,749 --> 00:36:51,167
♪ Went out to look ♪
634
00:36:51,250 --> 00:36:54,170
♪ For a reason to hide again ♪
635
00:36:54,253 --> 00:36:56,422
♪ Well, well ♪
636
00:36:56,505 --> 00:36:59,759
♪ Buddy, you found it ♪
637
00:37:00,301 --> 00:37:02,845
♪ Now come out with your hands up ♪
638
00:37:02,929 --> 00:37:06,641
♪ We've got you surrounded ♪
639
00:37:15,650 --> 00:37:16,651
One more.
640
00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:20,238
[electronic music playing]
641
00:37:27,578 --> 00:37:29,580
[music continues]
642
00:37:52,687 --> 00:37:54,689
[inaudible]
643
00:38:04,073 --> 00:38:06,075
[synth-pop music playing]
644
00:38:16,752 --> 00:38:19,588
♪ I grew up as your usual suburbanite ♪
645
00:38:19,672 --> 00:38:23,175
♪ A tiny town in Massachusetts
Overwhelmingly white ♪
646
00:38:23,259 --> 00:38:26,846
♪ I went to church on Sundays
In a suit and a tie ♪
647
00:38:26,929 --> 00:38:29,473
♪ Then spent my free time
Watching Family Guy ♪
648
00:38:29,557 --> 00:38:33,352
♪ I started doing comedy
When I was just a sheltered kid ♪
649
00:38:33,436 --> 00:38:36,105
♪ I wrote offensive shit
And I said it ♪
650
00:38:36,188 --> 00:38:40,234
♪ Father, please forgive me
For I did not realize what I did ♪
651
00:38:40,318 --> 00:38:42,653
♪ Or that I'd live to regret it ♪
652
00:38:42,737 --> 00:38:46,907
♪ Times are changing
And I'm getting old ♪
653
00:38:46,991 --> 00:38:49,160
♪ Are you gonna hold me accountable? ♪
654
00:38:49,243 --> 00:38:52,496
♪ My bed is empty, and I'm getting cold ♪
655
00:38:52,580 --> 00:38:55,583
♪ Isn't anybody gonna
Hold me accountable? ♪
656
00:38:55,666 --> 00:38:56,834
[moans]
657
00:38:56,917 --> 00:38:58,502
♪ I'm problematic ♪
658
00:38:59,587 --> 00:39:00,880
♪ He's a problem ♪
659
00:39:00,963 --> 00:39:02,923
♪ When I was 17, on Halloween ♪
660
00:39:03,007 --> 00:39:04,925
♪ I dressed up as Aladdin ♪
661
00:39:06,052 --> 00:39:07,386
♪ He's a problem ♪
662
00:39:07,470 --> 00:39:09,013
♪ I did not darken my skin ♪
663
00:39:09,096 --> 00:39:11,432
♪ But still it feels weird in hindsight ♪
664
00:39:11,515 --> 00:39:13,517
[music continues]
665
00:39:22,651 --> 00:39:26,030
♪ I want to show you
How I'm growing as a person, but first ♪
666
00:39:26,113 --> 00:39:29,617
♪ I feel I must address the lyrics
From the previous verse ♪
667
00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:32,953
♪ I tried to hide behind my childhood
And that's not okay ♪
668
00:39:33,037 --> 00:39:35,956
♪ My actions are my own
I won't explain them away ♪
669
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:40,127
♪ I've done a lot of self-reflecting
Since I started singing this song ♪
670
00:39:40,211 --> 00:39:42,797
♪ I was totally wrong when I said it ♪
671
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:46,592
♪ Father, please forgive me
For I did not realize what I did ♪
672
00:39:46,675 --> 00:39:49,470
♪ Or that I'd live to regret it ♪
673
00:39:49,553 --> 00:39:53,349
♪ Times are changing
And I'm getting old ♪
674
00:39:53,432 --> 00:39:55,559
♪ Are you gonna hold me accountable? ♪
675
00:39:55,643 --> 00:39:58,854
♪ My bed is empty, and I'm getting cold ♪
676
00:39:58,938 --> 00:40:02,149
♪ Isn't anybody gonna
Hold me accountable? ♪
677
00:40:02,233 --> 00:40:04,151
[moan echoing]
678
00:40:05,027 --> 00:40:06,362
♪ I'm problematic ♪
679
00:40:07,655 --> 00:40:08,989
♪ He's a problem ♪
680
00:40:09,073 --> 00:40:13,035
♪ I just remembered that Aladdin costume's
In my mother's attic ♪
681
00:40:14,036 --> 00:40:16,497
-♪ He's a problem ♪
-♪ I'm gonna go home and burn it… ♪
682
00:40:16,580 --> 00:40:19,291
Or not burn it. Is burning it bad?
What should I do with it?
683
00:40:20,209 --> 00:40:22,336
♪ And I've been totally awful ♪
684
00:40:22,420 --> 00:40:26,632
♪ My closet is chock-full of stuff
That is vaguely shitty ♪
685
00:40:26,715 --> 00:40:28,843
♪ All of it was perfectly lawful ♪
686
00:40:28,926 --> 00:40:32,513
♪ Just not very thoughtful at all
And just really shitty ♪
687
00:40:32,596 --> 00:40:35,349
♪ And I've been totally awful ♪
688
00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:39,603
♪ My closet is chock-full of stuff
That is vaguely shitty ♪
689
00:40:39,687 --> 00:40:41,856
♪ All of it was perfectly lawful ♪
690
00:40:41,939 --> 00:40:44,733
♪ Just not very thoughtful at all
And just really ♪
691
00:40:44,817 --> 00:40:49,155
♪ And I'm really fucking sorry ♪
692
00:40:49,238 --> 00:40:52,658
♪ Bitch, I'm trying to listen
Shit, I’ve been complacent ♪
693
00:40:52,741 --> 00:40:55,828
♪ Sorry ♪
694
00:40:55,911 --> 00:40:58,831
♪ If I'm gonna catch up
First, I gotta fess up ♪
695
00:40:58,914 --> 00:41:05,296
♪ Sorry ♪
696
00:41:05,379 --> 00:41:11,760
♪ Sorry ♪
697
00:41:17,099 --> 00:41:19,059
[projector whirring]
698
00:41:31,780 --> 00:41:32,907
[light switches click]
699
00:41:38,871 --> 00:41:40,915
[clicking]
700
00:41:53,511 --> 00:41:54,512
[gasps] Sh--
701
00:42:02,394 --> 00:42:05,564
[inhales deeply] So, um…
702
00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:10,486
I've been working on this special now
for six months.
703
00:42:12,571 --> 00:42:18,077
And… the whole time
I've had a… a goal in mind,
704
00:42:18,953 --> 00:42:22,039
which is I wanted to finish this thing
705
00:42:23,582 --> 00:42:26,168
before I turned 30.
706
00:42:27,753 --> 00:42:31,757
Um, because the idea of… of turning 30,
707
00:42:33,008 --> 00:42:36,053
while still in this fucking room,
708
00:42:37,012 --> 00:42:38,806
working on this thing alone,
709
00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:42,142
um, that just seemed…
710
00:42:44,019 --> 00:42:46,897
I just… I just wanted to avoid that.
711
00:42:46,981 --> 00:42:47,982
So…
712
00:42:49,191 --> 00:42:52,611
And you might be thinking, "Well,
that's fine. You know, look at you."
713
00:42:52,695 --> 00:42:55,823
"You radiate such youth."
714
00:42:56,323 --> 00:42:59,285
"You must not be turning 30 for years."
715
00:43:00,703 --> 00:43:03,122
And that's very, uh, nice of you to say.
716
00:43:03,747 --> 00:43:04,790
But the truth is
717
00:43:05,749 --> 00:43:07,668
um, I turn 30
718
00:43:08,586 --> 00:43:09,920
in less than a minute.
719
00:43:11,797 --> 00:43:13,090
[inhales deeply]
720
00:43:13,173 --> 00:43:16,343
So I'm just gonna sit here and enjoy
721
00:43:17,261 --> 00:43:18,929
uh, my twenties,
722
00:43:20,180 --> 00:43:23,142
and then get back to work.
723
00:43:28,355 --> 00:43:29,607
[sighs]
724
00:43:49,460 --> 00:43:51,420
[electronic music playing]
725
00:44:00,804 --> 00:44:02,806
Yay.
726
00:44:05,976 --> 00:44:07,978
♪ I used to run for miles ♪
727
00:44:08,062 --> 00:44:09,438
♪ I used to ride my bike ♪
728
00:44:09,521 --> 00:44:12,274
♪ I used to wake up with a smile ♪
729
00:44:12,358 --> 00:44:15,027
♪ And go to bed at night with a dream ♪
730
00:44:16,028 --> 00:44:17,404
[exhales] Ah.
731
00:44:17,488 --> 00:44:19,948
♪ But now I'm turning 30 ♪
732
00:44:20,699 --> 00:44:21,784
♪ No! ♪
733
00:44:22,534 --> 00:44:24,536
♪ I used to be the young one ♪
734
00:44:24,620 --> 00:44:26,288
♪ Got used to meeting people ♪
735
00:44:26,372 --> 00:44:28,624
♪ Who were used to meeting someone ♪
736
00:44:28,707 --> 00:44:30,542
♪ Who was born in 1990 ♪
737
00:44:30,626 --> 00:44:31,877
♪ No way! ♪
738
00:44:32,878 --> 00:44:34,171
Yeah, I was born in 1990.
739
00:44:34,254 --> 00:44:36,715
♪ Now I'm turning 30 ♪
740
00:44:37,716 --> 00:44:39,176
God… God damn it.
741
00:44:39,259 --> 00:44:43,263
-♪ I'm ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
742
00:44:43,347 --> 00:44:47,476
-♪ Turning ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
743
00:44:47,559 --> 00:44:51,146
-♪ Thirty ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
744
00:44:51,230 --> 00:44:55,984
-♪ I'm turning 30 ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
745
00:44:56,068 --> 00:44:58,028
♪ When he was 27 ♪
746
00:44:58,112 --> 00:45:00,030
♪ My granddad fought in Vietnam ♪
747
00:45:00,114 --> 00:45:02,116
♪ When I was 27 ♪
748
00:45:02,199 --> 00:45:04,743
♪ I built a birdhouse with my mom ♪
749
00:45:04,827 --> 00:45:05,994
Oh fuck.
750
00:45:06,662 --> 00:45:07,830
[sobs]
751
00:45:07,913 --> 00:45:10,541
♪ How am I 30? ♪
752
00:45:11,125 --> 00:45:12,042
[groans]
753
00:45:12,126 --> 00:45:14,628
♪ I used to make fun of the boomers ♪
754
00:45:14,712 --> 00:45:16,714
♪ In retrospect, a bit too much ♪
755
00:45:16,797 --> 00:45:18,924
♪ Now all these fucking zoomers ♪
756
00:45:19,007 --> 00:45:20,884
♪ Are telling me that I'm out of touch ♪
757
00:45:20,968 --> 00:45:24,930
Oh yeah? Well, your fucking phones
are poisoning your minds. Okay?
758
00:45:25,013 --> 00:45:27,307
So when you develop
a dissociative mental disorder
759
00:45:27,391 --> 00:45:29,601
in your late twenties,
don't come crawling back to me.
760
00:45:29,685 --> 00:45:33,355
-♪ I'm ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
761
00:45:33,439 --> 00:45:37,568
-♪ Turning ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
762
00:45:37,651 --> 00:45:41,238
-♪ Thirty ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
763
00:45:41,321 --> 00:45:45,409
-♪ I'm turning 30 ♪
-♪ Turning 30, turning 30 ♪
764
00:45:45,492 --> 00:45:50,122
♪ And now my stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
765
00:45:50,205 --> 00:45:54,251
♪ My stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
766
00:45:54,334 --> 00:45:58,422
♪ My stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
767
00:45:58,505 --> 00:46:02,092
♪ My stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
768
00:46:02,176 --> 00:46:06,805
♪ And now my stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
769
00:46:06,889 --> 00:46:10,976
♪ My stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
770
00:46:11,059 --> 00:46:15,272
♪ My stupid friends
Are having stupid children ♪
771
00:46:15,355 --> 00:46:18,650
♪ Stupid, fucking ugly, boring children ♪
772
00:46:18,734 --> 00:46:21,153
♪ It's 2020, and I'm 30 ♪
773
00:46:21,236 --> 00:46:23,197
♪ I'll do another ten ♪
774
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:27,993
♪ 2030 I'll be 40 and kill myself then ♪
775
00:46:28,076 --> 00:46:30,245
[breathes deeply]
776
00:46:31,622 --> 00:46:34,124
[breathing heavily]
777
00:46:38,796 --> 00:46:40,631
-Okay.
-[flashlight thuds]
778
00:46:41,757 --> 00:46:42,758
Check that one.
779
00:46:44,218 --> 00:46:45,969
-We'll do one more.
-[switch clicks]
780
00:46:48,472 --> 00:46:52,851
I just wanna say for the record, um,
that I do not want to kill myself, okay?
781
00:46:53,435 --> 00:46:56,396
I don't wanna kill myself,
and I'm not going to kill myself.
782
00:46:56,939 --> 00:47:00,526
Um, and if you're out there and you're
struggling with suicidal thoughts
783
00:47:00,609 --> 00:47:02,152
and you want to kill yourself,
784
00:47:02,653 --> 00:47:04,863
I just want to tell you don't.
785
00:47:06,156 --> 00:47:09,159
Okay? Can you not, please?
786
00:47:10,369 --> 00:47:12,246
Just don't. All right?
787
00:47:12,329 --> 00:47:14,998
Fucking quit it with the--
788
00:47:15,958 --> 00:47:19,378
But really, don't kill yourself.
You don't want to, because…
789
00:47:23,090 --> 00:47:25,259
There are people that love you…
790
00:47:25,342 --> 00:47:26,802
That's not true necessarily,
791
00:47:26,885 --> 00:47:29,555
but there could be people
that love you in the future,
792
00:47:29,638 --> 00:47:30,514
and just don't.
793
00:47:30,597 --> 00:47:32,599
I've had people close to me
kill themselves,
794
00:47:32,683 --> 00:47:35,477
and I'll be honest with you,
didn't love it.
795
00:47:36,228 --> 00:47:37,521
Didn't love that.
796
00:47:37,604 --> 00:47:38,689
So just don't.
797
00:47:39,773 --> 00:47:42,025
But if I could kill myself for a year…
798
00:47:43,026 --> 00:47:44,945
If I can-- I'd do it today.
799
00:47:45,028 --> 00:47:47,698
If I could kill myself today and be dead
800
00:47:48,323 --> 00:47:50,200
until like 18 months from now,
801
00:47:50,701 --> 00:47:54,329
um, I would do it, but alas…
802
00:47:54,413 --> 00:47:55,581
[inhales deeply]
803
00:47:55,664 --> 00:47:57,833
…when you kill yourself,
you're dead forever,
804
00:47:57,916 --> 00:48:01,169
and we shouldn't be dead forever yet.
805
00:48:02,045 --> 00:48:03,839
So let's not. Right?
806
00:48:04,548 --> 00:48:05,549
Come on, guys.
807
00:48:20,772 --> 00:48:21,899
[grunts]
808
00:48:24,318 --> 00:48:25,319
[exhales]
809
00:48:28,405 --> 00:48:30,407
[electronic music playing]
810
00:49:10,614 --> 00:49:11,698
[clears throat]
811
00:49:16,495 --> 00:49:17,996
[crickets chirping]
812
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:19,247
[Bo grunts]
813
00:49:36,640 --> 00:49:37,683
[sniffles]
814
00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:41,561
♪ How are you feeling? ♪
815
00:49:42,187 --> 00:49:44,189
♪ Do you like the show? ♪
816
00:49:44,690 --> 00:49:46,650
♪ Are you tired of it? ♪
817
00:49:46,733 --> 00:49:49,486
♪ Never mind, I don't wanna know ♪
818
00:49:49,569 --> 00:49:52,114
♪ Are you finding it boring? ♪
819
00:49:53,073 --> 00:49:55,075
♪ Too fast, too slow? ♪
820
00:49:55,742 --> 00:49:57,953
♪ I'm asking but don't answer ♪
821
00:49:58,036 --> 00:50:00,205
♪ 'Cause I don't wanna know ♪
822
00:50:00,288 --> 00:50:03,500
♪ Do I have your attention? ♪
823
00:50:04,001 --> 00:50:05,711
♪ Yes or no? ♪
824
00:50:06,461 --> 00:50:08,630
♪ I bet I'd guess the answer ♪
825
00:50:08,714 --> 00:50:10,841
♪ But I don't wanna know ♪
826
00:50:10,924 --> 00:50:14,177
♪ Am I on in the background? ♪
827
00:50:14,261 --> 00:50:17,055
♪ Are you on your phone? ♪
828
00:50:17,139 --> 00:50:19,307
♪ I'd ask you what you're watching ♪
829
00:50:19,391 --> 00:50:21,560
♪ But I don't wanna know ♪
830
00:50:21,643 --> 00:50:25,022
♪ Is there anyone out there? ♪
831
00:50:25,105 --> 00:50:27,691
♪ Or am I all alone? ♪
832
00:50:27,774 --> 00:50:29,985
♪ It wouldn't make a difference ♪
833
00:50:30,068 --> 00:50:32,404
♪ Still I don't wanna know ♪
834
00:50:32,487 --> 00:50:35,490
♪ I thought it'd be over by now ♪
835
00:50:35,574 --> 00:50:38,326
♪ But I got a while to go ♪
836
00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:40,537
♪ I'd give away the ending ♪
837
00:50:40,620 --> 00:50:42,039
♪ But you don't wanna kn-- ♪
838
00:50:42,122 --> 00:50:43,999
What's up, boys. Welcome to the stream.
839
00:50:44,082 --> 00:50:46,334
Um, I'm gonna be doing
some live play today
840
00:50:46,418 --> 00:50:48,045
for the first time in a while.
841
00:50:48,128 --> 00:50:50,964
Uh, you guys have been wanting that,
so we're gonna do--
842
00:50:51,048 --> 00:50:52,382
This is the title, Inside.
843
00:50:52,466 --> 00:50:55,218
I've got a lot of requests
for this game in chat.
844
00:50:55,302 --> 00:50:57,637
It's some indie developer.
I'm not really sure.
845
00:50:57,721 --> 00:50:59,723
I'm going in totally cold on this.
846
00:50:59,806 --> 00:51:03,393
Um, JB, thank you for the three months.
My dude, much appreciated.
847
00:51:04,061 --> 00:51:06,563
Um… Okay.
848
00:51:06,646 --> 00:51:08,607
[drum beating slowly]
849
00:51:08,690 --> 00:51:12,944
That looks pretty good, graphics-wise.
I mean, I know it's a cinematic, but…
850
00:51:13,028 --> 00:51:14,321
[inhales deeply]
851
00:51:14,404 --> 00:51:17,282
So we're gonna be trying
to do live plays every day this week,
852
00:51:17,365 --> 00:51:18,283
so tune in for that.
853
00:51:18,366 --> 00:51:21,203
I would be gifting 30 subs
at the end of the week.
854
00:51:21,286 --> 00:51:25,665
Um, day 50, 250… All right,
so this dude's been in here for a while.
855
00:51:25,749 --> 00:51:28,168
-So is this like an escape the room?
-[dings]
856
00:51:28,251 --> 00:51:30,003
-Or…
-[crying loudly]
857
00:51:30,087 --> 00:51:31,088
Okay.
858
00:51:31,755 --> 00:51:32,756
So I can cry.
859
00:51:32,839 --> 00:51:36,093
So he's… he's not happy
about being in this room.
860
00:51:36,176 --> 00:51:38,428
[gentle video game music playing]
861
00:51:38,512 --> 00:51:41,389
I like the music.
The music is actually nice on this.
862
00:51:41,473 --> 00:51:43,016
[footsteps]
863
00:51:44,101 --> 00:51:47,938
Controls are actually pretty smooth.
So you're in this like 2D set up, right?
864
00:51:48,814 --> 00:51:50,774
Like, I can't control the camera.
865
00:51:52,025 --> 00:51:53,151
Um…
866
00:51:54,611 --> 00:51:56,571
I'll give it-- I guess I'll cry again.
867
00:51:57,239 --> 00:51:58,240
-[crying]
-He's--
868
00:51:58,323 --> 00:52:00,784
So is the dude big, or is the room small?
869
00:52:00,867 --> 00:52:02,536
That's what I'm confused about.
870
00:52:03,036 --> 00:52:05,205
Chat's saying, try the door.
Yeah, well, okay.
871
00:52:05,288 --> 00:52:08,792
[laughing] I mean, I don't think
it's gonna be that simple, but I will.
872
00:52:08,875 --> 00:52:09,876
[clicking]
873
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:11,128
Yeah, there ya go.
874
00:52:11,670 --> 00:52:14,297
Um, okay,
Well, I think he'll probably cry again.
875
00:52:14,381 --> 00:52:15,924
-[crying]
-It's tough, dude.
876
00:52:16,716 --> 00:52:18,593
-It's tough. He's been in here a while.
-[dings]
877
00:52:18,677 --> 00:52:20,095
Um, see, I don't like that.
878
00:52:20,178 --> 00:52:23,682
I don't know why they feel the need
to give the hint so quick.
879
00:52:23,765 --> 00:52:26,560
I just wish they'd let me…
let me explore a little bit.
880
00:52:28,019 --> 00:52:31,982
Wha… I'm holding the flashlight
like a… like a cop.
881
00:52:32,065 --> 00:52:33,608
-Why is he doing that?
-[dings]
882
00:52:34,609 --> 00:52:37,612
[chuckles] Ah.
883
00:52:38,822 --> 00:52:41,199
All right. Okay. So…
884
00:52:42,242 --> 00:52:43,952
-[dings]
-[piano playing]
885
00:52:44,035 --> 00:52:45,036
All right.
886
00:52:47,289 --> 00:52:49,833
Okay, he seems a little happier now.
That's nice.
887
00:52:51,459 --> 00:52:52,669
I don't know.
888
00:52:52,752 --> 00:52:54,004
I'll cry, I guess, again.
889
00:52:54,087 --> 00:52:56,089
[crying]
890
00:52:56,840 --> 00:53:00,135
Okay, I'm not sure
what I'm supposed to be do--
891
00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:01,761
Oh! Nice.
892
00:53:02,637 --> 00:53:03,555
Okay, yeah.
893
00:53:03,638 --> 00:53:04,764
[continues crying]
894
00:53:06,141 --> 00:53:07,893
Yeah, great. Um…
895
00:53:07,976 --> 00:53:09,060
[music fades]
896
00:53:09,144 --> 00:53:10,645
All right, I'm into this.
897
00:53:10,729 --> 00:53:13,857
Yeah, it's giving me
sort of like Death Stranding vibes,
898
00:53:13,940 --> 00:53:17,444
you know,
'cause it's, like, it's fucking boring,
899
00:53:17,527 --> 00:53:19,529
but that's, like, the point, I think.
900
00:53:19,613 --> 00:53:21,114
[suspenseful music playing]
901
00:53:22,157 --> 00:53:24,743
Dante, thank you for the four months.
Appreciate it.
902
00:53:26,369 --> 00:53:28,371
[solemn music playing]
903
00:53:42,260 --> 00:53:44,262
[music continues]
904
00:54:00,403 --> 00:54:02,405
[music continues]
905
00:54:16,711 --> 00:54:19,381
-[upbeat music playing]
-[Bo] How we feeling out there tonight?
906
00:54:19,464 --> 00:54:20,548
[laughs]
907
00:54:20,632 --> 00:54:22,050
Yeah.
908
00:54:22,133 --> 00:54:23,927
I am not feeling good.
909
00:54:24,761 --> 00:54:26,596
♪ Wake up at 11:30 ♪
910
00:54:26,680 --> 00:54:28,723
-♪ Feeling like a bag of shit ♪
-♪ Oh no! ♪
911
00:54:28,807 --> 00:54:32,143
♪ All my clothes are dirty
So I'm smelling like a bag of shit ♪
912
00:54:32,727 --> 00:54:36,606
♪ Go to pour my coffee, and I miss my cup
OMG, that is just my luck ♪
913
00:54:36,690 --> 00:54:39,651
♪ Look in the mirror
Say, "What's up, you useless fuck?" ♪
914
00:54:40,235 --> 00:54:42,404
♪ Are you feeling what I'm feeling? ♪
915
00:54:42,487 --> 00:54:46,741
♪ I haven't had a shower
In the last nine days ♪
916
00:54:46,825 --> 00:54:48,576
♪ Ah ♪
917
00:54:48,660 --> 00:54:50,412
♪ Staring at the ceiling ♪
918
00:54:50,495 --> 00:54:53,498
♪ And waiting
For this feeling to go away ♪
919
00:54:54,582 --> 00:54:56,584
♪ But it won't go away ♪
920
00:54:56,668 --> 00:54:58,586
♪ I'm not really feeling
Like I wanna get lit ♪
921
00:54:58,670 --> 00:55:01,214
-♪ Tell us how you're feeling ♪
-♪ Well, I feel like shit ♪
922
00:55:01,298 --> 00:55:02,549
♪ Oh, shit ♪
923
00:55:02,632 --> 00:55:05,135
♪ Feeling like
A saggy, massive sack of shit ♪
924
00:55:05,218 --> 00:55:06,594
♪ Oh, shit ♪
925
00:55:06,678 --> 00:55:09,139
♪ Big 'ol motherfucking
Duffel bag of shit ♪
926
00:55:09,222 --> 00:55:10,598
♪ Oh, shit ♪
927
00:55:10,682 --> 00:55:12,434
♪ All day, all shit ♪
928
00:55:12,517 --> 00:55:14,311
♪ I'm not really feeling
Like I wanna get lit ♪
929
00:55:14,394 --> 00:55:16,604
-♪ Tell us how you're feeling ♪
-♪ I'm feeling like shit ♪
930
00:55:16,688 --> 00:55:18,440
-♪ Ladies, do you feel like shit? ♪
-♪ Yeah ♪
931
00:55:18,523 --> 00:55:20,358
-♪ Tell me, do you feel like shit? ♪
-♪ Oh yeah ♪
932
00:55:20,442 --> 00:55:22,569
-♪ Fellas, are you feeling like shit? ♪
-♪ Huh ♪
933
00:55:22,652 --> 00:55:24,612
-♪ Tell me, are you feeling like shit? ♪
-♪ Oh yeah ♪
934
00:55:24,696 --> 00:55:26,614
-♪ Ladies, do you feel like shit? ♪
-♪ Yeah? ♪
935
00:55:26,698 --> 00:55:28,616
-♪ Tell me, do you feel like shit? ♪
-♪ Oh yeah ♪
936
00:55:28,700 --> 00:55:30,618
-♪ Fellas, are you feeling like shit? ♪
-♪ Huh? ♪
937
00:55:30,702 --> 00:55:32,746
-♪ Tell me, are you feeling like shit? ♪
-♪ Oh yeah ♪
938
00:55:32,829 --> 00:55:34,331
[birds chirping]
939
00:55:35,332 --> 00:55:37,292
[Bo] So, um, my…
940
00:55:37,917 --> 00:55:41,046
uh, my current mental health is… is…
941
00:55:41,838 --> 00:55:45,759
rapidly approaching, um, an ATL,
942
00:55:45,842 --> 00:55:48,470
which is, um, that's an "all-time low,"
943
00:55:49,095 --> 00:55:50,722
not… not Atlanta.
944
00:55:50,805 --> 00:55:52,807
[inhales deeply] And…
945
00:55:55,769 --> 00:55:59,647
You know, I feel okay when I'm asleep.
Like when I'm asleep, I feel all right,
946
00:55:59,731 --> 00:56:02,150
but it's basically
from the moment I wake up,
947
00:56:02,692 --> 00:56:04,444
I, uh, I just get this--
948
00:56:04,527 --> 00:56:06,112
♪ Feeling in my body ♪
949
00:56:06,196 --> 00:56:07,781
♪ Way down deep inside me ♪
950
00:56:07,864 --> 00:56:10,825
-♪ I try not to fight it ♪
-♪ Describe it ♪
951
00:56:10,909 --> 00:56:13,244
♪ All right
A few things start to happen ♪
952
00:56:13,328 --> 00:56:14,954
♪ My vision starts to flatten ♪
953
00:56:15,038 --> 00:56:16,790
♪ My heart, it gets to tappin' ♪
954
00:56:16,873 --> 00:56:18,625
♪ And I think I'm gonna die ♪
955
00:56:19,918 --> 00:56:21,461
Yeah, so, um…
956
00:56:21,544 --> 00:56:22,545
Yeah. Not…
957
00:56:23,838 --> 00:56:26,383
Not doing great.
958
00:56:26,466 --> 00:56:28,134
[inhales deeply]
959
00:56:28,218 --> 00:56:29,219
[clears throat]
960
00:56:32,430 --> 00:56:34,349
♪ Welcome to the Internet ♪
961
00:56:34,432 --> 00:56:36,267
♪ Have a look around ♪
962
00:56:36,351 --> 00:56:39,646
♪ Anything that brain of yours
Can think of can be found ♪
963
00:56:39,729 --> 00:56:41,773
♪ We've got mountains of content ♪
964
00:56:41,856 --> 00:56:43,233
♪ Some better, some worse ♪
965
00:56:43,733 --> 00:56:47,320
♪ If none of it's of interest to you
You'd be the first ♪
966
00:56:47,862 --> 00:56:49,739
♪ Welcome to the Internet ♪
967
00:56:49,823 --> 00:56:51,116
♪ Come and take a seat ♪
968
00:56:51,199 --> 00:56:55,203
♪ Would you like to see the news
Or any famous women's feet? ♪
969
00:56:55,286 --> 00:56:58,540
♪ There's no need to panic
This isn't a test ♪
970
00:56:58,623 --> 00:56:59,624
[laughs]
971
00:56:59,707 --> 00:57:02,669
♪ Just nod or shake your head
And we'll do the rest ♪
972
00:57:03,253 --> 00:57:05,088
♪ Welcome to the Internet ♪
973
00:57:05,171 --> 00:57:06,506
♪ What would you prefer? ♪
974
00:57:06,589 --> 00:57:10,593
♪ Would you like to fight
For civil rights or tweet a racial slur? ♪
975
00:57:10,677 --> 00:57:14,889
♪ Be happy, be horny
Be bursting with rage ♪
976
00:57:14,973 --> 00:57:18,435
♪ We got a million different ways
To engage ♪
977
00:57:18,518 --> 00:57:20,395
♪ Welcome to the Internet ♪
978
00:57:20,478 --> 00:57:21,855
♪ Put your cares aside ♪
979
00:57:21,938 --> 00:57:25,650
♪ Here's a tip for straining pasta
Here's a nine-year-old who died ♪
980
00:57:25,733 --> 00:57:29,404
♪ We got movies and doctors
And fantasy sports ♪
981
00:57:29,487 --> 00:57:32,782
♪ And a bunch of colored-pencil drawings
Of all the characters in Harry Potter ♪
982
00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:34,784
♪ Fucking each other
Welcome to the Internet ♪
983
00:57:34,868 --> 00:57:36,035
♪ Hold on to your socks ♪
984
00:57:36,119 --> 00:57:39,330
♪ 'Cause a random guy just kindly sent you
Photos of his cock ♪
985
00:57:39,414 --> 00:57:43,001
♪ They are grainy and off-putting
He just sent you more ♪
986
00:57:43,084 --> 00:57:45,587
♪ Don't act surprised
You know you like it, you whore ♪
987
00:57:45,670 --> 00:57:48,339
♪ See a man beheaded
Get offended, see a shrink ♪
988
00:57:48,423 --> 00:57:51,342
♪ Show us pictures of your children
Tell us every thought you think ♪
989
00:57:51,426 --> 00:57:54,304
♪ Start a rumor, buy a broom
Or send a death threat to a boomer ♪
990
00:57:54,387 --> 00:57:57,140
♪ Or DM a girl and groom her
Do a Zoom or find a tumor ♪
991
00:57:57,223 --> 00:58:00,018
♪ And here's a healthy breakfast option
You should kill your mom ♪
992
00:58:00,101 --> 00:58:03,062
♪ Here's why women never fuck you
Here's how you can build a bomb ♪
993
00:58:03,146 --> 00:58:05,773
♪ Which Power Ranger are you?
Take this quirky quiz ♪
994
00:58:05,857 --> 00:58:09,611
♪ Obama sent the immigrants
To vaccinate your kids ♪
995
00:58:10,236 --> 00:58:13,239
♪ Could I interest you in everything
All of the time? ♪
996
00:58:13,323 --> 00:58:16,367
♪ A little bit of everything
All of the time ♪
997
00:58:16,451 --> 00:58:19,287
♪ Apathy's a tragedy
And boredom is a crime ♪
998
00:58:19,370 --> 00:58:21,789
♪ Anything and everything
All of the time ♪
999
00:58:21,873 --> 00:58:25,043
♪ Could I interest you in everything
All of the time? ♪
1000
00:58:25,126 --> 00:58:27,962
♪ A little bit of everything
All of the time ♪
1001
00:58:28,046 --> 00:58:30,882
♪ Apathy's a tragedy
And boredom is a crime ♪
1002
00:58:30,965 --> 00:58:33,927
♪ Anything and everything
All of the time ♪
1003
00:58:35,595 --> 00:58:37,597
[playing gentle music]
1004
00:58:43,478 --> 00:58:44,479
You know,
1005
00:58:46,022 --> 00:58:47,649
it wasn't always like this.
1006
00:58:50,735 --> 00:58:53,863
♪ Not very long ago ♪
1007
00:58:54,447 --> 00:58:57,367
♪ Just before your time ♪
1008
00:58:58,326 --> 00:59:01,996
♪ Right before the towers fell ♪
1009
00:59:02,080 --> 00:59:05,124
♪ Circa '99 ♪
1010
00:59:05,208 --> 00:59:07,710
♪ This was catalogues ♪
1011
00:59:07,794 --> 00:59:09,963
♪ Travel blogs ♪
1012
00:59:10,046 --> 00:59:12,173
♪ A chat room or two ♪
1013
00:59:13,174 --> 00:59:17,136
♪ We set our sights and spent our nights ♪
1014
00:59:17,220 --> 00:59:19,097
♪ Waiting ♪
1015
00:59:20,431 --> 00:59:22,183
♪ For you ♪
1016
00:59:22,725 --> 00:59:23,726
♪ You ♪
1017
00:59:24,227 --> 00:59:27,355
♪ Insatiable you ♪
1018
00:59:27,981 --> 00:59:32,277
♪ Mommy let you use her iPad ♪
1019
00:59:32,360 --> 00:59:35,029
♪ You were barely two ♪
1020
00:59:35,613 --> 00:59:38,658
♪ And it did all the things ♪
1021
00:59:38,741 --> 00:59:42,537
♪ We designed it to do ♪
1022
00:59:43,538 --> 00:59:44,706
♪ Now look at you ♪
1023
00:59:45,582 --> 00:59:47,375
Oh. [chuckles]
1024
00:59:47,458 --> 00:59:48,876
♪ Look at you ♪
1025
00:59:49,377 --> 00:59:54,007
♪ You, you ♪
1026
00:59:54,507 --> 00:59:58,636
♪ Unstoppable, watchable ♪
1027
00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:00,513
♪ Your time is now ♪
1028
01:00:00,597 --> 01:00:02,599
♪ Your inside's out ♪
1029
01:00:02,682 --> 01:00:05,810
♪ Honey, how you grew ♪
1030
01:00:05,893 --> 01:00:09,606
♪ And if we stick together ♪
1031
01:00:09,689 --> 01:00:13,026
♪ Who knows what we'll do ♪
1032
01:00:13,526 --> 01:00:16,946
♪ It was always the plan ♪
1033
01:00:17,030 --> 01:00:20,867
♪ To put the world in your hand ♪
1034
01:00:23,536 --> 01:00:25,538
[laughing hysterically]
1035
01:00:33,046 --> 01:00:38,551
♪ Could I interest you in everything
All of the time? ♪
1036
01:00:39,052 --> 01:00:43,681
♪ A bit of everything all of the time ♪
1037
01:00:43,765 --> 01:00:48,728
♪ Apathy's a tragedy
And boredom is a crime ♪
1038
01:00:48,811 --> 01:00:52,315
♪ Anything and everything
All of the time ♪
1039
01:00:52,398 --> 01:00:55,401
♪ Could I interest you in everything
All of the time? ♪
1040
01:00:55,485 --> 01:00:58,321
♪ A little bit of everything
All of the time ♪
1041
01:00:58,404 --> 01:01:01,199
♪ Apathy's a tragedy
And boredom is a crime ♪
1042
01:01:01,282 --> 01:01:03,785
♪ Anything and everything
And anything and everything ♪
1043
01:01:03,868 --> 01:01:06,704
♪ And anything and everything
All of the time ♪
1044
01:01:06,788 --> 01:01:08,706
I've been freaking out for a long time,
1045
01:01:08,790 --> 01:01:12,460
thinking I'm never gonna finish
this special and be working on it forever.
1046
01:01:12,543 --> 01:01:14,170
And recently, I've been feeling like,
1047
01:01:14,253 --> 01:01:17,090
"Oh, man, maybe I am
getting close to done with this."
1048
01:01:17,173 --> 01:01:21,761
"Maybe I'm gonna finish it after all."
And that has made me completely freak out
1049
01:01:21,844 --> 01:01:24,263
because if I finish this special,
1050
01:01:24,347 --> 01:01:28,810
that means that I have to,
um, not work on it anymore.
1051
01:01:28,893 --> 01:01:31,729
And that means
I have to just live my life,
1052
01:01:31,813 --> 01:01:35,233
and so I'm not gonna do that,
and I'm gonna not finish the special.
1053
01:01:35,316 --> 01:01:37,235
I'm gonna work on it forever, I think.
1054
01:01:37,318 --> 01:01:39,737
So, yeah, I'm gonna work on this forever,
1055
01:01:39,821 --> 01:01:42,657
and I'm never gonna release it.
I'm not talking to anybody now.
1056
01:01:42,740 --> 01:01:43,991
I'm just talking to myself.
1057
01:01:44,075 --> 01:01:45,827
So, yeah, who fucking cares?
1058
01:01:45,910 --> 01:01:49,706
Fuck you, and goodbye,
and let's keep going.
1059
01:01:51,290 --> 01:01:53,584
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1060
01:01:53,668 --> 01:01:56,045
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1061
01:01:56,129 --> 01:01:58,464
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1062
01:01:59,716 --> 01:02:00,800
♪ Ah ♪
1063
01:02:00,883 --> 01:02:03,219
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1064
01:02:03,302 --> 01:02:05,638
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1065
01:02:05,722 --> 01:02:07,974
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1066
01:02:09,016 --> 01:02:10,393
♪ You did it! ♪
1067
01:02:10,476 --> 01:02:12,812
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1068
01:02:12,895 --> 01:02:15,231
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1069
01:02:15,314 --> 01:02:17,984
♪ Jeffrey Bezos ♪
1070
01:02:18,067 --> 01:02:20,069
♪ Congratulations! ♪
1071
01:02:23,614 --> 01:02:25,616
[disembodied cheers and laughter]
1072
01:02:26,325 --> 01:02:28,327
[disembodied laughter]
1073
01:02:28,411 --> 01:02:30,413
[cheers and applause]
1074
01:02:34,083 --> 01:02:36,002
[laughter gets louder]
1075
01:02:37,962 --> 01:02:39,422
[birds chirping]
1076
01:02:39,505 --> 01:02:41,090
[Bo laughing]
1077
01:02:41,632 --> 01:02:43,134
Man, you guys are a great crowd.
1078
01:02:43,217 --> 01:02:46,053
Give it up for yourselves for coming out,
by the way, tonight. Give it up.
1079
01:02:46,137 --> 01:02:47,597
[clapping]
1080
01:02:48,473 --> 01:02:51,142
Supporting live comedy
in these weird times.
1081
01:02:51,225 --> 01:02:54,103
Um, it's crazy. Um…
1082
01:02:54,729 --> 01:02:57,982
These are some pretty crazy times,
but it's nice during these crazy times
1083
01:02:58,065 --> 01:02:59,859
that we can get together. We can laugh.
1084
01:02:59,942 --> 01:03:02,028
[laughing] You know? Um…
1085
01:03:02,528 --> 01:03:03,529
[clicking tongue]
1086
01:03:03,613 --> 01:03:05,490
I've learned something
over this last year,
1087
01:03:05,573 --> 01:03:06,657
which is pretty funny.
1088
01:03:06,741 --> 01:03:09,285
Um, I've learned that
1089
01:03:10,578 --> 01:03:13,831
real-world human-to-human
tactile contact will kill you,
1090
01:03:14,332 --> 01:03:17,335
and that all human interaction,
1091
01:03:17,418 --> 01:03:21,464
whether it be social, political,
spiritual, sexual, or interpersonal
1092
01:03:21,547 --> 01:03:25,134
should be contained
in the much more safe, much more real
1093
01:03:25,218 --> 01:03:27,595
interior digital space.
1094
01:03:27,678 --> 01:03:29,222
That the outside world,
1095
01:03:29,305 --> 01:03:30,890
the non-digital world,
1096
01:03:30,973 --> 01:03:36,103
is merely a theatrical space
in which one stages and records content
1097
01:03:36,187 --> 01:03:39,774
for the much more real,
much more vital digital space.
1098
01:03:39,857 --> 01:03:42,151
One should only engage
with the outside world
1099
01:03:42,235 --> 01:03:43,903
as one engages with a coal mine.
1100
01:03:43,986 --> 01:03:47,824
Suit up, gather what is needed,
and return to the surface.
1101
01:03:48,407 --> 01:03:49,575
Um… [clicking tongue]
1102
01:03:50,451 --> 01:03:53,955
And is it just me, or do pirates need
to take a little bit better care
1103
01:03:54,038 --> 01:03:55,373
of their fuckin' maps?
1104
01:03:56,874 --> 01:03:59,585
You know, when I find a pirate's map,
1105
01:04:00,711 --> 01:04:04,298
it's… it's always tea-stained,
and the edges are burnt,
1106
01:04:04,382 --> 01:04:07,385
and it's like if you're a pirate,
all right, and you're gonna
1107
01:04:08,344 --> 01:04:12,014
make this map and expect me
to carry it around the globe
1108
01:04:12,098 --> 01:04:13,850
as I search for your treasure,
1109
01:04:13,933 --> 01:04:15,226
then laminate it.
1110
01:04:15,309 --> 01:04:17,311
[birds chirping]
1111
01:04:18,437 --> 01:04:20,356
-[flickering]
-[crickets chirping]
1112
01:04:20,439 --> 01:04:22,859
[owl hooting]
1113
01:04:28,114 --> 01:04:30,533
I can't really, uh,
play the guitar very well,
1114
01:04:31,075 --> 01:04:32,201
um, or sing, so…
1115
01:04:32,910 --> 01:04:35,496
You know, apologies. [sniffles]
1116
01:04:35,580 --> 01:04:37,582
[strumming guitar]
1117
01:04:41,961 --> 01:04:47,425
♪ Stunning 8K resolution meditation app ♪
1118
01:04:50,219 --> 01:04:53,389
♪ In honor of the revolution ♪
1119
01:04:53,472 --> 01:04:55,766
♪ It's half-off at the Gap ♪
1120
01:04:58,603 --> 01:05:00,938
♪ Deadpool, self-awareness ♪
1121
01:05:01,022 --> 01:05:03,816
♪ Loving parents, harmless fun ♪
1122
01:05:06,402 --> 01:05:08,946
♪ The backlash to the backlash ♪
1123
01:05:09,030 --> 01:05:11,699
♪ To the thing that's just begun ♪
1124
01:05:14,493 --> 01:05:16,829
♪ There it is ♪
1125
01:05:16,913 --> 01:05:18,039
♪ Again ♪
1126
01:05:18,122 --> 01:05:20,041
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1127
01:05:21,375 --> 01:05:24,170
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1128
01:05:24,253 --> 01:05:26,631
♪ There it is ♪
1129
01:05:26,714 --> 01:05:27,840
♪ Again ♪
1130
01:05:27,924 --> 01:05:29,675
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1131
01:05:31,093 --> 01:05:33,304
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1132
01:05:35,473 --> 01:05:38,726
♪ The surgeon general's pop-up shop ♪
1133
01:05:38,809 --> 01:05:41,020
♪ Robert Iger's face ♪
1134
01:05:43,606 --> 01:05:46,776
♪ Discount Etsy agitprop ♪
1135
01:05:46,859 --> 01:05:49,153
♪ Bugle's take on race ♪
1136
01:05:51,781 --> 01:05:54,158
♪ Female Colonel Sanders ♪
1137
01:05:54,241 --> 01:05:56,994
♪ Easy answers, civil war ♪
1138
01:05:59,538 --> 01:06:02,500
♪ The whole world at your fingertips ♪
1139
01:06:02,583 --> 01:06:05,086
♪ The ocean at your door ♪
1140
01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:10,675
♪ The live-action Lion King ♪
1141
01:06:10,758 --> 01:06:13,678
♪ The Pepsi halftime show ♪
1142
01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:18,766
♪ Twenty thousand years of this ♪
1143
01:06:18,849 --> 01:06:21,143
♪ Seven more to go ♪
1144
01:06:23,729 --> 01:06:25,940
♪ Carpool Karaoke ♪
1145
01:06:26,023 --> 01:06:29,110
♪ Steve Aoki, Logan Paul ♪
1146
01:06:31,445 --> 01:06:34,031
♪ A gift shop at the gun range ♪
1147
01:06:34,115 --> 01:06:36,951
♪ A mass shooting at the mall ♪
1148
01:06:39,578 --> 01:06:41,914
♪ There it is ♪
1149
01:06:41,998 --> 01:06:43,165
♪ Again ♪
1150
01:06:43,249 --> 01:06:45,084
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1151
01:06:46,460 --> 01:06:49,255
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1152
01:06:49,338 --> 01:06:51,757
♪ There it is ♪
1153
01:06:51,841 --> 01:06:53,009
♪ Again ♪
1154
01:06:53,092 --> 01:06:54,802
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1155
01:06:56,303 --> 01:06:58,764
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1156
01:07:00,766 --> 01:07:03,978
♪ Reading Pornhub's terms of service ♪
1157
01:07:04,061 --> 01:07:06,439
♪ Going for a drive ♪
1158
01:07:06,522 --> 01:07:10,317
♪ And obeying all the traffic laws ♪
1159
01:07:10,401 --> 01:07:12,778
♪ In Grand Theft Auto 5 ♪
1160
01:07:13,738 --> 01:07:16,032
♪ Full agoraphobic ♪
1161
01:07:16,115 --> 01:07:19,702
♪ Losing focus, cover blown ♪
1162
01:07:21,620 --> 01:07:24,040
♪ A book on getting better ♪
1163
01:07:24,123 --> 01:07:28,252
♪ Hand-delivered by a drone ♪
1164
01:07:29,587 --> 01:07:32,798
♪ Total disassociation ♪
1165
01:07:32,882 --> 01:07:35,468
♪ Fully out your mind ♪
1166
01:07:37,678 --> 01:07:40,848
♪ Googling "derealization" ♪
1167
01:07:40,931 --> 01:07:43,225
♪ Hating what you find ♪
1168
01:07:46,062 --> 01:07:49,273
♪ That unapparent summer air ♪
1169
01:07:49,356 --> 01:07:51,317
♪ In early fall ♪
1170
01:07:53,486 --> 01:07:55,821
♪ The quiet comprehending ♪
1171
01:07:55,905 --> 01:07:59,825
♪ Of the ending of it all ♪
1172
01:08:01,368 --> 01:08:03,662
♪ There it is ♪
1173
01:08:03,746 --> 01:08:04,872
♪ Again ♪
1174
01:08:04,955 --> 01:08:06,874
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1175
01:08:08,167 --> 01:08:10,961
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1176
01:08:11,045 --> 01:08:13,380
♪ There it is ♪
1177
01:08:13,464 --> 01:08:14,590
♪ Again ♪
1178
01:08:14,673 --> 01:08:16,509
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1179
01:08:17,843 --> 01:08:20,262
♪ That funny feeling ♪
1180
01:08:22,223 --> 01:08:24,517
♪ Hey, what can ya say? ♪
1181
01:08:24,600 --> 01:08:26,602
♪ We were overdue ♪
1182
01:08:27,686 --> 01:08:31,023
♪ But it'll be over soon ♪
1183
01:08:31,107 --> 01:08:32,441
♪ You wait ♪
1184
01:08:34,985 --> 01:08:37,279
♪ Hey, what can ya say? ♪
1185
01:08:37,363 --> 01:08:39,323
♪ We were overdue ♪
1186
01:08:40,449 --> 01:08:43,661
♪ But it'll be over soon ♪
1187
01:08:43,744 --> 01:08:44,745
♪ Just wait ♪
1188
01:08:44,829 --> 01:08:46,831
[scatting]
1189
01:08:47,706 --> 01:08:50,042
♪ Hey, what can ya say? ♪
1190
01:08:50,126 --> 01:08:51,961
♪ We were overdue ♪
1191
01:08:53,212 --> 01:08:56,382
♪ But it'll be over soon ♪
1192
01:08:56,465 --> 01:08:57,424
♪ You wait ♪
1193
01:08:57,508 --> 01:08:58,926
[scatting]
1194
01:09:00,427 --> 01:09:02,596
♪ Hey, what can ya say? ♪
1195
01:09:02,680 --> 01:09:04,473
♪ We were overdue ♪
1196
01:09:04,557 --> 01:09:05,641
[humming]
1197
01:09:05,724 --> 01:09:08,894
♪ But it'll be over soon ♪
1198
01:09:08,978 --> 01:09:10,729
♪ You wait ♪
1199
01:09:10,813 --> 01:09:12,731
[scatting]
1200
01:09:12,815 --> 01:09:15,109
♪ Hey, what can ya say? ♪
1201
01:09:15,192 --> 01:09:17,027
♪ We were overdue ♪
1202
01:09:18,237 --> 01:09:21,323
♪ But it'll be over soon ♪
1203
01:09:21,407 --> 01:09:22,491
♪ You wait ♪
1204
01:09:22,575 --> 01:09:23,868
[scatting]
1205
01:09:23,951 --> 01:09:25,161
[music fades]
1206
01:09:26,453 --> 01:09:28,247
[birds chirping]
1207
01:09:37,298 --> 01:09:38,299
[exhales]
1208
01:09:42,136 --> 01:09:43,179
[sniffles]
1209
01:09:45,848 --> 01:09:47,600
[exhales, clears throat]
1210
01:09:49,143 --> 01:09:50,186
So, I--
1211
01:09:50,728 --> 01:09:51,729
Jesus.
1212
01:09:52,813 --> 01:09:53,898
[clears throat]
1213
01:09:58,736 --> 01:10:03,991
So I've been working
on this, uh, special for…
1214
01:10:05,993 --> 01:10:08,204
a year now.
1215
01:10:08,746 --> 01:10:09,830
[inhales deeply]
1216
01:10:10,873 --> 01:10:12,041
It-- [exhales]
1217
01:10:13,959 --> 01:10:15,461
[sighing] Fucking…
1218
01:10:18,714 --> 01:10:19,798
[exhales]
1219
01:10:22,051 --> 01:10:23,135
[sniffles]
1220
01:10:25,554 --> 01:10:30,100
So I've been working on this special
for, um, a year now,
1221
01:10:31,936 --> 01:10:36,190
which is, um, a lot longer
1222
01:10:36,273 --> 01:10:39,485
than I anticipated working on it.
1223
01:10:40,069 --> 01:10:42,738
When I started…
1224
01:10:43,405 --> 01:10:44,448
[smacks leg]
1225
01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:47,493
[sighs]
1226
01:10:49,912 --> 01:10:50,996
[exhales]
1227
01:10:56,627 --> 01:10:58,337
So I've been working on-- [scoffs]
1228
01:10:58,420 --> 01:10:59,672
[drops mic]
1229
01:11:02,341 --> 01:11:03,467
I fucking…
1230
01:11:04,718 --> 01:11:06,512
I can't. I fucking…
1231
01:11:07,805 --> 01:11:08,806
Fucking…
1232
01:11:17,606 --> 01:11:19,316
[exhales]
1233
01:11:21,819 --> 01:11:22,820
I am…
1234
01:11:24,571 --> 01:11:25,572
not…
1235
01:11:29,034 --> 01:11:30,744
um, well.
1236
01:11:30,828 --> 01:11:32,454
[sobbing]
1237
01:11:37,293 --> 01:11:38,919
[continues sobbing]
1238
01:11:39,920 --> 01:11:41,922
[cheers and applause]
1239
01:11:43,882 --> 01:11:45,676
[electronic music playing]
1240
01:11:45,759 --> 01:11:47,845
[Bo] Thank you, guys. Thank you very much.
1241
01:11:47,928 --> 01:11:48,929
Thank you.
1242
01:11:52,182 --> 01:11:54,351
You guys have been incredible. Thank you.
1243
01:11:54,435 --> 01:11:56,437
[cheering and applause continue]
1244
01:12:00,649 --> 01:12:02,443
I couldn't have done this
without you guys.
1245
01:12:02,526 --> 01:12:04,653
I couldn't, really. I…
1246
01:12:05,654 --> 01:12:08,240
This last year has been… [sighs]
1247
01:12:08,907 --> 01:12:11,869
You know, there have been times
that, um… [sighs]
1248
01:12:11,952 --> 01:12:13,871
[laughter]
1249
01:12:14,538 --> 01:12:16,498
But just knowing you're here,
1250
01:12:16,582 --> 01:12:18,667
you know, feeling you here with me.
1251
01:12:19,668 --> 01:12:21,003
Um…
1252
01:12:21,086 --> 01:12:22,087
[laughter]
1253
01:12:22,171 --> 01:12:23,255
Yeah, thank you.
1254
01:12:23,339 --> 01:12:25,341
[cheers and applause]
1255
01:12:28,719 --> 01:12:31,347
You know, I hate to ask because, uh,
1256
01:12:32,431 --> 01:12:34,391
you've given me so much.
1257
01:12:36,435 --> 01:12:37,436
But…
1258
01:12:40,230 --> 01:12:42,399
I need you to do one more thing for me.
1259
01:12:45,611 --> 01:12:46,695
Can you do that?
1260
01:12:46,779 --> 01:12:47,863
[cheers and applause]
1261
01:12:49,573 --> 01:12:51,992
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1262
01:12:52,076 --> 01:12:53,827
♪ Get on out of your seats ♪
1263
01:12:53,911 --> 01:12:56,455
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1264
01:12:57,790 --> 01:13:00,167
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1265
01:13:00,250 --> 01:13:02,086
♪ Get on out of your seats ♪
1266
01:13:02,169 --> 01:13:05,672
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1267
01:13:06,757 --> 01:13:08,634
♪ Are you feeling nervous? ♪
1268
01:13:08,717 --> 01:13:10,260
♪ Are you having fun? ♪
1269
01:13:10,803 --> 01:13:12,763
♪ It's almost over ♪
1270
01:13:12,846 --> 01:13:14,807
♪ It's just begun ♪
1271
01:13:14,890 --> 01:13:16,850
♪ Don't overthink this ♪
1272
01:13:16,934 --> 01:13:18,185
♪ Look in my eye ♪
1273
01:13:18,268 --> 01:13:20,229
♪ Don't be scared, don't be shy ♪
1274
01:13:20,312 --> 01:13:23,065
♪ Come on in, the water's fine ♪
1275
01:13:23,148 --> 01:13:26,902
♪ We're going to go
Where everybody knows ♪
1276
01:13:26,985 --> 01:13:28,987
♪ Everybody knows ♪
1277
01:13:29,071 --> 01:13:30,197
♪ Everybody ♪
1278
01:13:31,281 --> 01:13:35,119
♪ We're going to go
Where everybody knows ♪
1279
01:13:35,202 --> 01:13:38,622
♪ Everybody knows ♪
1280
01:13:38,705 --> 01:13:41,208
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1281
01:13:41,291 --> 01:13:43,043
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1282
01:13:43,127 --> 01:13:45,838
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1283
01:13:46,964 --> 01:13:49,466
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1284
01:13:49,550 --> 01:13:51,218
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1285
01:13:51,301 --> 01:13:55,055
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me, yeah ♪
1286
01:13:55,139 --> 01:13:57,641
♪ Hands down ♪
1287
01:13:57,724 --> 01:13:59,101
♪ Pray for me ♪
1288
01:13:59,184 --> 01:14:01,770
♪ Heads down now ♪
1289
01:14:01,854 --> 01:14:03,272
♪ Pray for me ♪
1290
01:14:03,355 --> 01:14:06,024
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1291
01:14:06,108 --> 01:14:07,693
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1292
01:14:07,776 --> 01:14:11,238
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1293
01:14:11,321 --> 01:14:12,698
[music continues]
1294
01:14:14,491 --> 01:14:16,076
You want to hear a funny story?
1295
01:14:16,160 --> 01:14:18,162
[cheers]
1296
01:14:19,037 --> 01:14:20,497
So, uh,
1297
01:14:20,581 --> 01:14:22,541
five years ago, I quit
1298
01:14:23,667 --> 01:14:26,545
performing live comedy,
1299
01:14:27,838 --> 01:14:32,551
because I was beginning to have, uh,
severe panic attacks while on stage,
1300
01:14:33,135 --> 01:14:36,096
which is not a great place to have them.
1301
01:14:36,180 --> 01:14:37,431
[laughter]
1302
01:14:37,514 --> 01:14:39,141
So, I… I quit.
1303
01:14:40,517 --> 01:14:43,896
And I didn't perform for five years,
and I spent that time…
1304
01:14:46,190 --> 01:14:48,567
trying to improve myself mentally.
1305
01:14:49,735 --> 01:14:50,819
And you know what?
1306
01:14:51,862 --> 01:14:52,779
I did!
1307
01:14:53,655 --> 01:14:54,823
I got better.
1308
01:14:55,616 --> 01:14:58,160
I got so much better, in fact,
1309
01:14:59,077 --> 01:15:01,371
that in January of
1310
01:15:03,040 --> 01:15:04,249
2020,
1311
01:15:07,669 --> 01:15:10,130
I thought, "You know what, I should…
1312
01:15:12,132 --> 01:15:13,675
start performing again."
1313
01:15:15,469 --> 01:15:19,264
"I've been hiding from the world,
1314
01:15:19,932 --> 01:15:21,433
and I need to…
1315
01:15:24,228 --> 01:15:25,521
reenter."
1316
01:15:27,814 --> 01:15:28,857
And then…
1317
01:15:30,817 --> 01:15:32,486
the funniest thing happened.
1318
01:15:32,569 --> 01:15:34,321
[laughter]
1319
01:15:34,404 --> 01:15:36,323
♪ Are you feeling nervous? ♪
1320
01:15:36,406 --> 01:15:37,908
♪ Are you having fun? ♪
1321
01:15:38,492 --> 01:15:40,536
♪ It's almost over ♪
1322
01:15:40,619 --> 01:15:42,496
♪ It's just begun ♪
1323
01:15:42,579 --> 01:15:44,540
♪ Don't overthink this ♪
1324
01:15:44,623 --> 01:15:45,916
♪ Look in my eye ♪
1325
01:15:45,999 --> 01:15:47,918
♪ Don't be scared, don't be shy ♪
1326
01:15:48,001 --> 01:15:50,170
♪ Come on in, the water's fine ♪
1327
01:15:50,254 --> 01:15:52,548
♪ You say the ocean's rising ♪
1328
01:15:52,631 --> 01:15:54,258
♪ Like I give a shit ♪
1329
01:15:54,341 --> 01:15:56,677
♪ You say the whole world's ending ♪
1330
01:15:56,760 --> 01:15:58,929
♪ Honey, it already did ♪
1331
01:15:59,012 --> 01:16:00,806
♪ You're not gonna slow it ♪
1332
01:16:00,889 --> 01:16:03,141
♪ Heaven knows you tried ♪
1333
01:16:04,351 --> 01:16:07,187
♪ Got it?
Good. Now get inside ♪
1334
01:16:07,271 --> 01:16:11,066
♪ We're going to go
Where everybody knows ♪
1335
01:16:11,149 --> 01:16:13,068
♪ Everybody knows ♪
1336
01:16:13,151 --> 01:16:15,320
♪ Everybody knows ♪
1337
01:16:15,404 --> 01:16:19,241
♪ We're going to go
Where everybody knows ♪
1338
01:16:19,324 --> 01:16:22,327
♪ Everybody knows ♪
1339
01:16:22,411 --> 01:16:25,330
♪ Come on, get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1340
01:16:25,414 --> 01:16:27,165
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1341
01:16:27,249 --> 01:16:29,918
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1342
01:16:30,502 --> 01:16:33,547
♪ Come on, get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1343
01:16:33,630 --> 01:16:35,299
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1344
01:16:35,382 --> 01:16:39,177
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me, yeah ♪
1345
01:16:39,261 --> 01:16:41,805
♪ Hands down ♪
1346
01:16:41,888 --> 01:16:43,015
♪ Pray for me ♪
1347
01:16:43,098 --> 01:16:45,892
♪ Heads down now ♪
1348
01:16:45,976 --> 01:16:46,977
♪ Pray for me ♪
1349
01:16:47,060 --> 01:16:49,688
♪ I said, get your fuckin' hands up… ♪
1350
01:16:50,314 --> 01:16:52,107
Get up. Get up.
1351
01:16:52,983 --> 01:16:55,569
I'm talking to you,
get the fuck up! [pants]
1352
01:16:55,652 --> 01:16:58,155
♪ Get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1353
01:16:58,238 --> 01:16:59,948
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1354
01:17:00,032 --> 01:17:02,743
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1355
01:17:02,826 --> 01:17:06,371
♪ Hey, now get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1356
01:17:06,455 --> 01:17:08,165
♪ Get on out of your seat ♪
1357
01:17:08,248 --> 01:17:11,460
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me, yeah ♪
1358
01:17:11,543 --> 01:17:14,546
♪ Come on, hands down ♪
1359
01:17:14,630 --> 01:17:15,797
♪ Pray for me ♪
1360
01:17:15,881 --> 01:17:18,717
♪ Heads down now ♪
1361
01:17:18,800 --> 01:17:19,926
♪ Pray for me ♪
1362
01:17:20,010 --> 01:17:22,804
♪ I said get your fuckin' hands up ♪
1363
01:17:22,888 --> 01:17:24,514
♪ Get-- ♪ [yelps]
1364
01:17:24,598 --> 01:17:27,851
♪ All eyes on me
All eyes on me ♪
1365
01:17:28,769 --> 01:17:31,188
[mic feedback]
1366
01:17:37,653 --> 01:17:39,655
[birds chirping]
1367
01:17:48,038 --> 01:17:50,040
[gentle music playing]
1368
01:18:00,342 --> 01:18:01,426
[water running]
1369
01:18:04,096 --> 01:18:05,347
[Bo on laptop] Hi.
1370
01:18:05,430 --> 01:18:10,811
Welcome to, uh, whatever this is, um…
1371
01:18:10,894 --> 01:18:12,562
[whirring]
1372
01:18:16,400 --> 01:18:18,402
[music continues]
1373
01:18:27,661 --> 01:18:29,663
[continues playing music]
1374
01:18:43,927 --> 01:18:45,929
[music continues]
1375
01:19:04,531 --> 01:19:05,991
[music fades]
1376
01:19:09,745 --> 01:19:11,204
[sighs]
1377
01:19:16,042 --> 01:19:17,878
I think-- [clears throat]
1378
01:19:18,920 --> 01:19:20,589
I think I'm… I'm done.
1379
01:19:37,689 --> 01:19:38,774
[exhales]
1380
01:19:39,608 --> 01:19:43,820
Um, possible… uh, ending song
1381
01:19:43,904 --> 01:19:47,491
that is not finished yet.
1382
01:19:47,574 --> 01:19:48,575
Test.
1383
01:19:49,075 --> 01:19:51,328
Take one.
1384
01:19:51,828 --> 01:19:53,830
[playing sentimental music]
1385
01:20:05,842 --> 01:20:08,595
♪ So long ♪
1386
01:20:09,846 --> 01:20:12,682
♪ Goodbye ♪
1387
01:20:14,392 --> 01:20:17,437
♪ I'll see you when I see you ♪
1388
01:20:17,521 --> 01:20:19,815
♪ You can pick the street ♪
1389
01:20:19,898 --> 01:20:23,235
♪ I'll meet you on the other side ♪
1390
01:20:28,740 --> 01:20:31,535
♪ So long ♪
1391
01:20:32,744 --> 01:20:34,955
♪ Goodbye ♪
1392
01:20:36,957 --> 01:20:40,210
♪ Do I really have to finish? ♪
1393
01:20:40,794 --> 01:20:44,130
♪ Do returns always diminish? ♪
1394
01:20:44,214 --> 01:20:46,216
♪ Did I say that right? ♪
1395
01:20:50,554 --> 01:20:56,434
♪ Does anybody want
To joke when no one's ♪
1396
01:20:56,518 --> 01:21:01,064
♪ Laughing in the background? ♪
1397
01:21:01,147 --> 01:21:06,820
♪ So this is how it ends ♪
1398
01:21:08,905 --> 01:21:11,408
♪ I promise ♪
1399
01:21:11,491 --> 01:21:15,495
♪ To never go outside again ♪
1400
01:21:22,043 --> 01:21:25,088
♪ So long ♪
1401
01:21:27,465 --> 01:21:28,592
♪ Bye ♪
1402
01:21:30,302 --> 01:21:33,638
♪ I'm slowly losing power ♪
1403
01:21:34,222 --> 01:21:37,392
♪ Has it only been an hour? ♪
1404
01:21:37,475 --> 01:21:39,728
♪No, that can't be right ♪
1405
01:21:44,983 --> 01:21:47,736
♪ So long ♪
1406
01:21:48,904 --> 01:21:50,947
♪ Goodbye ♪
1407
01:21:53,199 --> 01:21:55,994
♪ Hey, here's a fun idea ♪
1408
01:21:56,536 --> 01:21:59,789
♪ How about I sit on the couch ♪
1409
01:21:59,873 --> 01:22:02,542
♪ And I watch you next time ♪
1410
01:22:06,880 --> 01:22:10,258
♪ I wanna hear you tell ♪
1411
01:22:10,342 --> 01:22:12,636
♪ A joke when no one's ♪
1412
01:22:12,719 --> 01:22:17,265
♪ Laughing in the background ♪
1413
01:22:17,349 --> 01:22:23,188
♪ So this is how it ends ♪
1414
01:22:25,106 --> 01:22:27,567
♪ I promise ♪
1415
01:22:27,651 --> 01:22:31,613
♪ To never go outside again ♪
1416
01:22:32,489 --> 01:22:34,324
♪ Am I going crazy? ♪
1417
01:22:34,407 --> 01:22:36,159
♪ Would I even know? ♪
1418
01:22:36,242 --> 01:22:39,955
♪ Am I right back where I started
Fourteen years ago? ♪
1419
01:22:40,038 --> 01:22:41,873
♪ Wanna guess the ending? ♪
1420
01:22:41,957 --> 01:22:43,750
♪ If it ever does ♪
1421
01:22:43,833 --> 01:22:46,419
♪ I swear to God
That all I've ever wanted ♪
1422
01:22:46,503 --> 01:22:48,797
♪ Was a little bit of everything ♪
1423
01:22:48,880 --> 01:22:50,507
♪ All of the time ♪
1424
01:22:51,049 --> 01:22:54,511
♪ A bit of everything all of the time ♪
1425
01:22:54,594 --> 01:22:58,515
♪ Apathy's a tragedy
And boredom is a crime ♪
1426
01:22:58,598 --> 01:23:02,644
♪ I'm finished playing
And I'm staying inside ♪
1427
01:23:02,727 --> 01:23:06,564
♪ If I wake up in a house
That's full of smoke ♪
1428
01:23:06,648 --> 01:23:10,276
♪ I'll panic
So call me up and tell me a joke ♪
1429
01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:15,490
♪ When I'm fully irrelevant
And totally broken, damn it ♪
1430
01:23:15,573 --> 01:23:17,909
♪ Call me up and tell me a joke ♪
1431
01:23:18,410 --> 01:23:19,828
♪ Oh shit ♪
1432
01:23:21,329 --> 01:23:25,041
♪ You're really joking
At a time like this ♪
1433
01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:27,836
[in distorted voice] ♪ Well, well ♪
1434
01:23:27,919 --> 01:23:30,755
♪ Look who's inside again ♪
1435
01:23:30,839 --> 01:23:32,590
♪ Went out to look ♪
1436
01:23:32,674 --> 01:23:36,469
♪ For a reason to hide again ♪
1437
01:23:36,553 --> 01:23:39,305
♪ Well, well ♪
1438
01:23:39,389 --> 01:23:43,643
♪ Buddy, you found it ♪
1439
01:23:44,144 --> 01:23:47,397
♪ Now come out with your hands up ♪
1440
01:23:47,480 --> 01:23:52,610
♪ We've got you surrounded ♪
1441
01:23:59,993 --> 01:24:01,995
[eerie high-pitched ringing]
1442
01:24:32,942 --> 01:24:34,110
[ringing stops]
1443
01:24:48,500 --> 01:24:50,502
[birds calling]
1444
01:25:18,988 --> 01:25:20,990
[disembodied applause]
1445
01:25:34,712 --> 01:25:36,714
[disembodied laughter]
1446
01:25:48,726 --> 01:25:50,728
[laughter continues]
1447
01:26:00,363 --> 01:26:02,365
[laughter gets louder]
1448
01:26:03,366 --> 01:26:05,952
[cheers and applause]
1449
01:26:10,874 --> 01:26:12,876
[laughter]
1450
01:26:17,380 --> 01:26:19,382
[laughter gets louder]
1451
01:26:26,055 --> 01:26:28,433
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1452
01:26:28,516 --> 01:26:31,102
♪ Any day now ♪
1453
01:26:31,853 --> 01:26:33,563
♪ Any day now ♪
1454
01:26:34,105 --> 01:26:36,441
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1455
01:26:36,524 --> 01:26:39,152
♪ Any day now ♪
1456
01:26:39,819 --> 01:26:41,529
♪ Any day now ♪
1457
01:26:42,071 --> 01:26:44,449
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1458
01:26:44,532 --> 01:26:47,243
♪ Any day now ♪
1459
01:26:47,744 --> 01:26:49,579
♪ Any day now ♪
1460
01:26:50,079 --> 01:26:52,457
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1461
01:26:52,540 --> 01:26:55,210
♪ Any day now ♪
1462
01:26:55,793 --> 01:26:57,587
♪ Any day now ♪
1463
01:26:58,087 --> 01:27:00,465
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1464
01:27:00,548 --> 01:27:03,134
♪ Any day now ♪
1465
01:27:03,885 --> 01:27:05,595
♪ Any day now ♪
1466
01:27:06,137 --> 01:27:08,514
♪ It'll stop any day now ♪
1467
01:27:08,598 --> 01:27:11,351
♪ Any day now ♪
1468
01:27:11,893 --> 01:27:13,519
♪ Any day now ♪
1469
01:27:13,603 --> 01:27:15,605
[music continues]
1470
01:27:21,486 --> 01:27:22,612
[music ends]
103483
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof