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1
00:00:11,764 --> 00:00:14,165
Seals picked this guy up out of Kabul.
2
00:00:14,233 --> 00:00:19,704
Name is Omar Abdul Hassan Assad
Abad Ali Shahid Mohammed.
3
00:00:19,772 --> 00:00:21,939
CIA guys couldn't get
anything out of him.
4
00:00:21,973 --> 00:00:23,807
They said you were our best bet.
5
00:00:30,014 --> 00:00:32,048
You know who I am, don't you?
6
00:00:32,082 --> 00:00:34,684
So you know what I'm gonna do if
you don't tell me what I need to
7
00:00:34,718 --> 00:00:35,251
know.
8
00:00:35,286 --> 00:00:37,121
You do not scare me!
9
00:00:37,155 --> 00:00:38,422
Stand him up!
10
00:00:42,128 --> 00:00:43,795
Aah!
11
00:00:43,829 --> 00:00:45,063
Where's the target?!
12
00:00:45,097 --> 00:00:49,200
Allah, make my testicles strong
against the boot of the infid... Aah!
13
00:00:49,234 --> 00:00:50,969
Where is the target?!
14
00:00:51,037 --> 00:00:53,405
My gonads are indestructible.
15
00:00:53,473 --> 00:00:56,476
My penis shaft is strong
like the oak tree.
16
00:00:56,510 --> 00:00:59,145
Tell me...where...the target is!
17
00:00:59,213 --> 00:01:02,316
Tell me...where...
the target... is!
18
00:01:02,384 --> 00:01:03,417
Aah!
19
00:01:03,451 --> 00:01:04,785
His vitals are spiking.
20
00:01:04,819 --> 00:01:05,853
He can't take much more.
21
00:01:05,921 --> 00:01:10,124
We're just getting started.
22
00:01:11,226 --> 00:01:12,827
Agent Flowers, his heart.
23
00:01:14,997 --> 00:01:16,965
No. No.
24
00:01:22,205 --> 00:01:24,305
Wait! Wait a minute!
25
00:01:25,441 --> 00:01:26,841
Okay, look.
26
00:01:26,875 --> 00:01:28,209
Maybe I was being stubborn.
27
00:01:28,277 --> 00:01:29,844
Let's try and talk this out!
28
00:01:29,912 --> 00:01:31,212
Wait! I remember!
29
00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:36,952
The target is...
Woodcre-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-st!
30
00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:38,821
♪ I am the stone that
the builder refused ♪
31
00:01:38,856 --> 00:01:41,824
♪ I am the visual, the inspiration
that made lady sing the blues ♪
32
00:01:41,859 --> 00:01:43,660
♪ I'm the spark that
makes your idea bright ♪
33
00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,229
♪ the same spark that
lights the dark ♪
34
00:01:45,296 --> 00:01:47,130
♪ so that you can know your
left from your right ♪
35
00:01:47,198 --> 00:01:49,299
♪ I am the ballot in your box,
the bullet in the gun ♪
36
00:01:49,367 --> 00:01:51,768
♪ the inner glow that lets you
know to call your brother son ♪
37
00:01:51,836 --> 00:01:53,036
♪ the story that just begun ♪
38
00:01:53,070 --> 00:01:54,738
♪ the promise of what's to come ♪
39
00:01:54,773 --> 00:01:57,207
♪ and I'ma remain a soldier
till the war is won ♪
40
00:01:57,208 --> 00:02:07,208
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
41
00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:15,860
So, it's true, huh?
42
00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:17,294
You're finally calling it quits.
43
00:02:17,362 --> 00:02:19,931
Yeah.
So now you can stop spying on me.
44
00:02:19,998 --> 00:02:23,001
Well, just because you say
you're retiring doesn't mean
45
00:02:23,036 --> 00:02:23,936
you're retiring.
46
00:02:24,004 --> 00:02:28,007
Could be like Jay-Z and come back,
like, a couple of months later.
47
00:02:28,041 --> 00:02:29,843
But it is the right thing to do.
48
00:02:29,877 --> 00:02:31,278
You can't fight the future.
49
00:02:31,312 --> 00:02:32,979
Don't waste your life trying.
50
00:02:33,014 --> 00:02:34,982
Oh, and one more thing.
51
00:02:35,016 --> 00:02:37,084
Know how you always say "they"
52
00:02:37,119 --> 00:02:38,720
are coming to get you?
53
00:02:38,754 --> 00:02:41,389
Well, this time, they actually
are coming to get you.
54
00:02:41,457 --> 00:02:42,791
Who?
55
00:02:42,825 --> 00:02:46,094
Central terrorist...
Agency or unit, or...
56
00:02:46,162 --> 00:02:49,164
Come on, I don't know... a
bunch of guys with guns.
57
00:02:49,198 --> 00:02:50,331
Why?
58
00:02:50,366 --> 00:02:52,634
They seem to think you're
a domestic terrorist.
59
00:02:52,702 --> 00:02:54,637
Because you are.
I'm retired.
60
00:02:54,705 --> 00:02:57,373
Why don't you go ahead and
tell them that while they're
61
00:02:57,407 --> 00:02:58,374
waterboarding you?
62
00:02:58,409 --> 00:02:59,743
Is this a trick?
63
00:02:59,777 --> 00:03:00,877
No. A trick is a [bleep]
64
00:03:00,912 --> 00:03:03,881
who'd be out spending
money on these bitches.
65
00:03:03,915 --> 00:03:05,716
This is a warning.
66
00:03:12,224 --> 00:03:13,990
Hey, man, you see my new iPhone?
67
00:03:14,025 --> 00:03:15,825
I got one.
I don't like the [bleep]
68
00:03:15,893 --> 00:03:17,894
I love my iPhone.
69
00:03:17,928 --> 00:03:20,096
This [bleep] can do
anything and everything.
70
00:03:20,163 --> 00:03:23,065
Yeah. Everything except
make a [bleep] phone call.
71
00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:26,168
And on the line right now is
regular caller... I love this
72
00:03:26,236 --> 00:03:29,138
guy... always has some brilliant
insights... Dan Stucky.
73
00:03:29,172 --> 00:03:30,906
Dan, what's pissing
you off today, buddy?
74
00:03:30,940 --> 00:03:32,708
What isn't pissing me off today?
75
00:03:32,743 --> 00:03:34,777
Let's talk about our
president, "Buck Osama."
76
00:03:34,811 --> 00:03:35,978
It's lunacy!
77
00:03:36,046 --> 00:03:38,715
It's like he's declaring
war on rich people.
78
00:03:38,783 --> 00:03:41,085
Right now, you know, I'm a
private security contractor on
79
00:03:41,119 --> 00:03:43,153
the front lines, defending
American freedom, but I got
80
00:03:43,221 --> 00:03:45,356
plans to start my own business,
and I figure to have about
81
00:03:45,424 --> 00:03:46,991
$30 million in the first two years.
82
00:03:47,026 --> 00:03:49,127
Wow! Well, Obama's gonna
kill that $30 million.
83
00:03:49,161 --> 00:03:49,861
Just kill it.
84
00:03:49,895 --> 00:03:52,264
Yeah, he's gonna take it,
redistribute it, and give it to
85
00:03:52,298 --> 00:03:55,233
all those losers who sit around all
day watching tv and getting fat.
86
00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:56,334
Unbelievable, isn't it?
87
00:03:56,402 --> 00:03:59,136
I just heard Obama's passing
legislation that'll let guys who
88
00:03:59,170 --> 00:04:01,238
can't get laid go to your
house and bang your wife.
89
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,975
Dan the security man, as always,
you are right on point.
90
00:04:06,010 --> 00:04:07,310
Always good to hear from you.
91
00:04:07,344 --> 00:04:10,212
Next caller.
92
00:04:10,247 --> 00:04:11,213
Hey, right on time.
93
00:04:11,247 --> 00:04:14,116
It's tweedlee [bleep] dumbass and
tweedlee bigger dumb [bleep] ass.
94
00:04:14,150 --> 00:04:16,152
Today's our last day, Dan.
You gonna miss us?
95
00:04:16,219 --> 00:04:18,755
I just can't wait till we get
this brand-new super [bleep]
96
00:04:18,789 --> 00:04:20,423
fantastic security
system up and running.
97
00:04:20,458 --> 00:04:23,326
Yeah, in 24 hours, the new
system will be online, the
98
00:04:23,394 --> 00:04:26,130
building will reopen, and we
be out your life forever.
99
00:04:26,198 --> 00:04:28,399
You know what keeps this
building secure? Me.
100
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:30,869
A dedicated, fit, fearless
security-enforcement
101
00:04:30,936 --> 00:04:34,039
professional who can spot a godless
terrorist from a mile away!
102
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,041
Let me see your fancy [bleep]
computer do that.
103
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,310
I think you'll feel
differently tomorrow.
104
00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:43,215
Just make sure you here 24 hours
from now... oh, about... 3:17 P.M.
105
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,685
And watch the magic happen.
106
00:04:45,752 --> 00:04:47,320
Gonna be like you died
and went to heaven.
107
00:04:48,322 --> 00:04:49,389
Hey, do you have an iPhone?
108
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:52,391
Eat my ass.
109
00:04:55,061 --> 00:04:55,861
I love it.
110
00:04:55,895 --> 00:04:58,930
I got everything I need for this
whole operation right here.
111
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:00,765
I got my secret plans and maps.
112
00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:03,134
Only problem is it's
so thin, so light.
113
00:05:03,202 --> 00:05:05,904
It could fall out my pocket and I don't
even know the [bleep] happened.
114
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:08,107
And did you know the screen was
so indestructible, it could stop
115
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:08,941
a speeding bullet?
116
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,643
can't stop no damn bullet.
117
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:12,378
It's an iPhone, not the ispyphone.
118
00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:15,113
Okay. Timing mechanism
is functioning.
119
00:05:15,181 --> 00:05:16,315
Everything looks good.
120
00:05:16,382 --> 00:05:18,017
Setting the timer.
121
00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:19,919
I remember when these [bleep]
first came out, man.
122
00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:22,655
Bitches would be coming up to you,
like, "let me see that iPhone.
123
00:05:22,690 --> 00:05:23,623
Let me play with it!
124
00:05:23,658 --> 00:05:24,758
Let me stick it up my ass!
125
00:05:24,826 --> 00:05:26,393
Put it in my mouth!
"Suck on it!"
126
00:05:26,428 --> 00:05:28,396
Then one day, I got tired
of all these questions.
127
00:05:28,430 --> 00:05:29,396
You know what I'm saying?
128
00:05:29,431 --> 00:05:31,265
I let the girl stick the
iPhone up her butt.
129
00:05:31,933 --> 00:05:34,201
Took the doctors 12
hours to get it out.
130
00:05:34,235 --> 00:05:35,202
And you know what?
131
00:05:35,270 --> 00:05:37,271
It was still working.
132
00:05:50,486 --> 00:05:51,920
It's good to see you, Jack.
133
00:05:51,987 --> 00:05:52,921
Thank you, director.
134
00:05:52,988 --> 00:05:53,988
How's Tracey?
135
00:05:54,022 --> 00:05:56,824
I remember you two were very
much in love and had your whole
136
00:05:56,892 --> 00:05:58,192
lives ahead of you.
137
00:05:58,226 --> 00:05:59,827
Yes, we were.
138
00:05:59,895 --> 00:06:01,996
Then...
139
00:06:04,032 --> 00:06:05,266
Tracey, wait!
140
00:06:05,334 --> 00:06:06,267
Aah!
141
00:06:06,301 --> 00:06:07,902
Unh!
142
00:06:07,970 --> 00:06:09,370
Tracey!
143
00:06:09,405 --> 00:06:10,838
Oh [bleep] That's bad.
144
00:06:10,906 --> 00:06:12,973
Yes, she died very violently, sir.
145
00:06:13,008 --> 00:06:15,643
After some time passed, I was
engaged to a very special woman
146
00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:17,278
named Eleanor.
147
00:06:17,313 --> 00:06:21,148
Then...
Catch, Agent Flowers!
148
00:06:21,183 --> 00:06:25,986
Aah! Aah!
149
00:06:26,021 --> 00:06:28,689
Eleanor!
150
00:06:28,723 --> 00:06:30,257
Holy [bleep] That's bad.
151
00:06:30,324 --> 00:06:31,992
I thought I would never love again.
152
00:06:32,026 --> 00:06:33,661
Then I met Taquanda.
153
00:06:33,728 --> 00:06:34,795
Taquanda?
154
00:06:34,829 --> 00:06:36,430
Yes, sir. Taquanda.
155
00:06:36,464 --> 00:06:38,631
Then...
Unh!
156
00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:40,801
No.
Jack, get this [bleep]
157
00:06:40,868 --> 00:06:42,636
What you standing
there for [bleep] it!
158
00:06:42,704 --> 00:06:43,704
Do something!
159
00:06:44,773 --> 00:06:48,175
Jack Flowers, you
worthless white [bleep]
160
00:06:48,243 --> 00:06:51,980
Taquand-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!
161
00:06:52,014 --> 00:06:54,448
That's terrible, Jack.
162
00:06:54,483 --> 00:06:55,984
He tied her to a missile?
163
00:06:56,018 --> 00:06:59,053
What kind of deranged, Wile E.
Coyote [bleep] is that?
164
00:06:59,087 --> 00:07:02,256
Well, I'd love to stand around and
reminisce, but we should get to work.
165
00:07:02,324 --> 00:07:04,792
We followed up on that
"Woodcrest" clue.
166
00:07:04,826 --> 00:07:06,060
Came up with one match.
167
00:07:06,127 --> 00:07:08,863
Domestic terrorist with
radical leftist affiliation.
168
00:07:08,897 --> 00:07:09,864
Name is Huey Freeman.
169
00:07:09,898 --> 00:07:11,800
Homeland wants you to pick him up.
170
00:07:11,867 --> 00:07:14,235
We'll have a field team ready in 20.
171
00:07:14,270 --> 00:07:15,938
Banes, are you sure about this?
172
00:07:15,972 --> 00:07:17,706
Look, I've done bad things in my day.
173
00:07:17,740 --> 00:07:18,707
I've killed people.
174
00:07:18,775 --> 00:07:20,776
I've also kicked a lot
of people in the nuts.
175
00:07:20,810 --> 00:07:22,044
I still hear their screams.
176
00:07:22,078 --> 00:07:22,978
Aah!
177
00:07:23,046 --> 00:07:24,146
Ohh!
178
00:07:24,214 --> 00:07:25,981
My nuts!
179
00:07:26,049 --> 00:07:27,983
But I've never hurt a child.
180
00:07:28,051 --> 00:07:29,618
He's no normal child, Jack.
181
00:07:29,686 --> 00:07:32,220
N.S.A.'S got a file on him
thicker than a Luke dancer.
182
00:07:32,254 --> 00:07:35,023
I don't know if you know
anything about Luke dancers,
183
00:07:35,057 --> 00:07:37,058
Jack, but they're very thick.
184
00:07:37,092 --> 00:07:40,228
Very large thighs and buttocks, Jack.
185
00:07:40,296 --> 00:07:41,930
That's how thick his file is.
186
00:07:41,964 --> 00:07:45,968
If he puts up a fight,
you put him down.
187
00:07:50,373 --> 00:07:51,406
Here's what I'm saying.
188
00:07:51,441 --> 00:07:53,876
I used the recorder app to
dictate the plan into the phone.
189
00:07:53,944 --> 00:07:56,779
I used the aroundme app to find out
the bomb parts and the detonators.
190
00:07:56,814 --> 00:07:58,781
And I used the Amazon app
to price everything out.
191
00:07:58,849 --> 00:08:00,751
Why pay any more than
necessary for C-4?
192
00:08:00,785 --> 00:08:02,219
gonna blow up anyway, right?
193
00:08:02,287 --> 00:08:04,588
Great. Maybe one day they'll
invent an app where you can
194
00:08:04,656 --> 00:08:07,191
actually call some [bleep] body.
195
00:08:09,962 --> 00:08:11,329
Crap.
196
00:08:11,397 --> 00:08:13,098
Great.
It's no problem.
197
00:08:13,132 --> 00:08:14,766
I'll just call my grandfather.
198
00:08:14,833 --> 00:08:16,367
He'll get us a new car.
199
00:08:16,402 --> 00:08:19,003
Now let me just use the GPS
to find out where we are.
200
00:08:19,038 --> 00:08:21,273
We down the street from
your house, asshole.
201
00:08:21,307 --> 00:08:24,676
Look. That's Riley's
house over there.
202
00:08:24,710 --> 00:08:26,211
Yep, that's what the iPhone say.
203
00:08:26,245 --> 00:08:30,749
Will you just please
make the [bleep] call?
204
00:08:30,783 --> 00:08:32,650
I ain't got no [bleep] bars.
205
00:08:37,389 --> 00:08:39,757
Granddad, I know you're
not gonna believe me, but I
206
00:08:39,791 --> 00:08:41,758
think there are government
agents that are coming to...
207
00:08:41,826 --> 00:08:44,761
Shh! Boy, I don't have
time for your crazy bull crap.
208
00:08:44,795 --> 00:08:46,996
I don't like to be bothered when
my "Real Housewives of Compton"
209
00:08:47,031 --> 00:08:47,997
is on!
210
00:08:48,032 --> 00:08:49,799
Oh, no, she didn't.
211
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:52,936
Ew! Yes, she did.
212
00:08:52,970 --> 00:08:54,805
Damn it! Aah!
213
00:08:54,839 --> 00:08:56,807
Pause it, boy.
214
00:08:59,978 --> 00:09:01,078
Hey, pops!
215
00:09:01,113 --> 00:09:03,081
We need a favor.
216
00:09:15,861 --> 00:09:18,263
And you delivered the final
shipment to the warehouse?
217
00:09:18,298 --> 00:09:20,632
Not yet.
We at the Freemans' right now.
218
00:09:20,667 --> 00:09:22,000
We, uh...blew a tire.
219
00:09:22,068 --> 00:09:24,002
What the hell are you
doing at the Freemans'?
220
00:09:24,036 --> 00:09:26,371
There's federal agents
closing in on that house!
221
00:09:26,439 --> 00:09:28,373
Get to the warehouse now!
222
00:09:28,408 --> 00:09:30,109
Ed, we got to jet.
223
00:09:30,177 --> 00:09:31,644
Show ain't over yet.
224
00:09:31,711 --> 00:09:33,646
Now, Ed.
225
00:09:36,883 --> 00:09:38,717
We got some [bleep] we
got to take care of.
226
00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,786
Super-secret-type [bleep]
227
00:09:40,821 --> 00:09:42,087
Ed, come on.
228
00:09:42,155 --> 00:09:43,322
Okay, fellas.
229
00:09:43,356 --> 00:09:45,357
Well, give your granddaddy my best.
230
00:09:45,392 --> 00:09:48,794
Oh, and, uh, I'd stay away from
downtown for quite a while.
231
00:09:48,828 --> 00:09:49,795
Ed!
232
00:09:49,863 --> 00:09:51,897
You should only be going uptown.
233
00:09:51,965 --> 00:09:52,865
Ed!
234
00:09:52,899 --> 00:09:54,634
U-p-t-o-w-n.
235
00:09:54,701 --> 00:09:58,771
Ed!
236
00:10:06,847 --> 00:10:08,047
Aah!
237
00:10:08,082 --> 00:10:10,983
Yes, I did say that I
would tap that ass.
238
00:10:11,018 --> 00:10:12,719
That's what I had to say, nigga.
239
00:10:20,127 --> 00:10:21,961
Federal agents!
240
00:10:21,995 --> 00:10:23,262
Move! Move! Move!
241
00:10:28,335 --> 00:10:30,803
You hoes need to get up off me.
242
00:10:30,871 --> 00:10:32,138
Butler, check in!
243
00:10:32,205 --> 00:10:34,139
Roger that, checking in.
244
00:10:37,344 --> 00:10:39,044
Rest of the house is clear.
245
00:10:39,112 --> 00:10:41,146
Damn it!
C.T.A., this is Flowers.
246
00:10:41,213 --> 00:10:42,480
The package is not here.
247
00:10:42,514 --> 00:10:44,782
I repeat, we did not get the package.
248
00:10:44,817 --> 00:10:46,150
Someone must have tipped him off.
249
00:10:46,218 --> 00:10:47,218
Set up a perimeter!
250
00:10:47,252 --> 00:10:49,153
He's probably still on foot.
251
00:10:49,187 --> 00:10:50,153
Jack, I got something.
252
00:10:50,221 --> 00:10:52,422
Looks like the old man's credit
card was just used to buy a
253
00:10:52,456 --> 00:10:53,323
train ticket online.
254
00:10:53,391 --> 00:10:55,392
I'm guessing our guy is on
his way to the station.
255
00:10:55,426 --> 00:10:56,293
We're on our way.
256
00:10:56,327 --> 00:10:58,695
All units, proceed in the
direction of the train station.
257
00:10:58,763 --> 00:11:01,298
I want this whole place
searched from top to bottom...
258
00:11:07,906 --> 00:11:09,306
Oh, I can't wait.
259
00:11:09,341 --> 00:11:12,944
I can't wait to see what the
white man gonna do to you.
260
00:11:13,011 --> 00:11:14,945
Just drive.
261
00:11:17,783 --> 00:11:21,119
Jack, I got a fast-moving yellow
bus about 3 miles ahead of you.
262
00:11:21,153 --> 00:11:22,320
Looks a little suspicious.
263
00:11:22,388 --> 00:11:25,223
All units, the package is
believed to be on a yellow bus
264
00:11:25,290 --> 00:11:26,290
straight ahead.
265
00:11:28,293 --> 00:11:29,127
Aah! Ohh!
266
00:11:29,194 --> 00:11:29,928
Look, look, look!
267
00:11:29,995 --> 00:11:31,095
Here come the white cavalry!
268
00:11:31,130 --> 00:11:32,930
Oh, they got you now, little nigga.
269
00:11:32,965 --> 00:11:33,998
Try to get the kid alive!
270
00:11:34,033 --> 00:11:36,200
I'm gonna try and get a
clean shot at the driver.
271
00:11:37,269 --> 00:11:38,403
Here he is!
272
00:11:38,437 --> 00:11:41,406
Here he is, Mr. White Man!
273
00:11:41,473 --> 00:11:42,373
Aah! Aah!
274
00:11:42,408 --> 00:11:43,741
Oh, I hate you!
275
00:11:43,775 --> 00:11:45,108
I hate you little nigga!
276
00:11:45,977 --> 00:11:48,011
Keep your foot on the gas!
277
00:12:13,138 --> 00:12:15,740
Take your foot off the gas!
278
00:12:17,075 --> 00:12:21,012
Aaaaaaaaaah!
279
00:12:21,046 --> 00:12:22,380
Oh.
280
00:12:29,421 --> 00:12:31,688
Ohh!
281
00:12:46,008 --> 00:12:48,810
In this footage from yesterday,
the marines subdued
282
00:12:48,844 --> 00:12:53,181
the possible, potential,
alleged suspects.
283
00:12:55,952 --> 00:12:57,186
Do you know who I am?
284
00:12:57,220 --> 00:12:58,087
No.
285
00:12:58,121 --> 00:13:00,356
Well, if you knew who I was,
then you would know what I'm
286
00:13:00,390 --> 00:13:02,825
gonna do with you if you don't
tell me what I need to know.
287
00:13:02,892 --> 00:13:04,727
Maybe.
But I don't know who you are.
288
00:13:04,795 --> 00:13:06,996
Do you know what kind of
damage a steel boot can do to
289
00:13:07,064 --> 00:13:08,797
prepubescent testicles?
290
00:13:08,832 --> 00:13:09,999
How would I know that?
291
00:13:10,066 --> 00:13:13,803
Tell me where the target is
before I kick you in the nuts!
292
00:13:13,871 --> 00:13:15,805
Get your hands off of me!
293
00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:17,140
I'm a proud American!
294
00:13:17,175 --> 00:13:18,075
it!
295
00:13:18,142 --> 00:13:21,244
I knew this great country was
gonna go straight to [bleep] in
296
00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:25,348
a sandwich bag once that bean-pie
chef became commander-in-chief!
297
00:13:25,416 --> 00:13:27,083
Do you want me to kick
you in the nuts?!
298
00:13:27,118 --> 00:13:27,784
No.
299
00:13:27,819 --> 00:13:29,953
Do you want me to kick
you in the nuts?!
300
00:13:29,987 --> 00:13:30,787
No.
301
00:13:30,821 --> 00:13:33,223
Do you want me to... wait, Jack.
302
00:13:33,257 --> 00:13:35,258
I do not want you to
kick him in the nuts.
303
00:13:35,292 --> 00:13:35,792
Why?
304
00:13:35,860 --> 00:13:38,362
He's innocent, but we found
something big at his house.
305
00:13:38,429 --> 00:13:41,265
Or should I say "thin and light"?
306
00:13:41,333 --> 00:13:43,802
This iPhone was found at the
Freeman residence, but it
307
00:13:43,869 --> 00:13:49,041
belongs to an Ed Wuncler III.
308
00:13:49,075 --> 00:13:51,144
Looks like he's the guy
we're looking for.
309
00:13:51,178 --> 00:13:54,214
We found the attack plans,
blueprints, schedule, everything.
310
00:13:54,248 --> 00:13:55,982
According to this, the
target is Wuncler Plaza.
311
00:13:56,050 --> 00:13:56,983
There's something else.
312
00:13:57,017 --> 00:13:59,219
A large shipment of unknown
materials at a warehouse.
313
00:13:59,253 --> 00:14:01,320
It doesn't say anything
about what it might be?
314
00:14:01,355 --> 00:14:04,256
No. But it's definitely
related to today's attack.
315
00:14:04,324 --> 00:14:08,894
We all know what it is
... bionuclear Anthrax.
316
00:14:08,961 --> 00:14:10,895
Bionuclear Anthrax.
317
00:14:10,963 --> 00:14:11,963
All right, let's move.
318
00:14:12,031 --> 00:14:13,030
Call Wuncler Plaza.
319
00:14:13,065 --> 00:14:15,299
Tell them to evacuate the
building immediately.
320
00:14:22,341 --> 00:14:24,943
Jack, I want you to find out
what's in that warehouse and
321
00:14:24,978 --> 00:14:26,945
then go after Ed the III
and his grandfather.
322
00:14:26,980 --> 00:14:28,948
I'll get your field
team in 10 minutes.
323
00:14:28,982 --> 00:14:32,852
Yes, sir.
324
00:14:32,887 --> 00:14:35,790
Look, Huey, I apologize for what
happened in there, but nobody is
325
00:14:35,824 --> 00:14:36,790
above the law.
326
00:14:36,858 --> 00:14:38,425
Wuncler is gonna pay for this.
327
00:14:38,493 --> 00:14:39,760
You have my word.
328
00:14:39,794 --> 00:14:40,861
Excuse me, everyone.
329
00:14:40,929 --> 00:14:42,229
Can I have your attention?
330
00:14:42,264 --> 00:14:45,199
I'm afraid we have to abort the
mission to arrest Ed the III and
331
00:14:45,233 --> 00:14:46,033
his grandfather.
332
00:14:46,101 --> 00:14:48,402
What?! What about the bomb?!
Sorry, Jack.
333
00:14:48,436 --> 00:14:50,405
Turns out some people
are above the law.
334
00:14:50,472 --> 00:14:52,941
The Wunclers will not pay
for what they did today.
335
00:14:53,009 --> 00:14:54,042
You have my word.
336
00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:55,310
Good work, everyone.
337
00:14:55,344 --> 00:14:56,744
Have a good weekend.
338
00:14:56,779 --> 00:14:59,280
And, oh... no going rogue.
339
00:14:59,314 --> 00:15:00,848
I got the tequila.
340
00:15:00,882 --> 00:15:02,383
Who's got the salt?
341
00:15:02,418 --> 00:15:03,317
I'm going rogue.
342
00:15:03,385 --> 00:15:05,954
Huey, you've got to get to
Wuncler Plaza and try to get as
343
00:15:06,021 --> 00:15:07,855
many people out of
there before it blows.
344
00:15:07,890 --> 00:15:10,291
A second ago, you were
gonna kick me in the nuts.
345
00:15:10,359 --> 00:15:12,126
Huey, please, I'm just doing my job.
346
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:15,030
It's a crappy job, but somebody's
got to kick people in the nuts.
347
00:15:15,064 --> 00:15:18,032
And sometimes you kick the wrong
person in the nuts, and that's tragic.
348
00:15:18,067 --> 00:15:21,036
But now we can both make sure it's
the right set of nuts that get kicked.
349
00:15:21,104 --> 00:15:22,938
You little, black,
communist niglet!
350
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,673
I want to press full charges!
351
00:15:24,707 --> 00:15:27,676
I... [ Gasps ]
352
00:15:27,744 --> 00:15:28,810
Jack Flowers.
353
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:30,246
You do know who I am, right?
354
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:31,847
Why... w-w-why, yes, sir.
355
00:15:31,881 --> 00:15:32,915
You Jack Flowers.
356
00:15:32,949 --> 00:15:35,651
You kick them arab terrorist
son-of-a-bitches in the nuts!
357
00:15:35,719 --> 00:15:37,753
You, sir, are an American hero.
358
00:15:37,788 --> 00:15:40,389
Right now, I need you to be
a hero and help Huey get to
359
00:15:40,457 --> 00:15:42,391
Wuncler Plaza before a bomb goes off.
360
00:15:42,459 --> 00:15:43,827
Yes, sir, Mr. sir.
361
00:15:43,894 --> 00:15:44,995
Come on, little nigga!
362
00:15:45,029 --> 00:15:45,929
You heard the man!
363
00:15:45,997 --> 00:15:49,032
Move your little communist ass
so we can save some white folk!
364
00:15:58,145 --> 00:16:00,179
Open the door!
365
00:16:00,214 --> 00:16:02,749
Hey, assholes, building's closed!
366
00:16:02,816 --> 00:16:05,084
Look, we got to get
everybody out of here.
367
00:16:05,119 --> 00:16:06,286
There are bombs in the building.
368
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:09,188
Ain't nobody in here but me, and
I'm giving the orders around here.
369
00:16:09,256 --> 00:16:11,191
Who the [bleep] are you two?!
370
00:16:11,258 --> 00:16:12,359
Okay, we tried.
371
00:16:12,393 --> 00:16:13,727
Now hush your mouth!
372
00:16:13,761 --> 00:16:15,095
There's a white man talking.
373
00:16:15,162 --> 00:16:16,162
Hey, wait a minute.
374
00:16:16,197 --> 00:16:17,330
You two are the terrorists.
375
00:16:17,365 --> 00:16:19,732
I don't know how you two
escaped, but you two [bleep]
376
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:22,168
with the wrong
security-enforcement officer.
377
00:16:22,202 --> 00:16:23,803
I ain't going anywhere.
378
00:16:26,073 --> 00:16:27,006
Unh!
379
00:16:27,074 --> 00:16:30,076
And neither are you.
380
00:16:49,998 --> 00:16:50,965
What the...?
381
00:16:55,437 --> 00:16:57,404
Hmm?
382
00:17:00,976 --> 00:17:04,411
Come on! Come on!
383
00:17:04,445 --> 00:17:10,717
I need the password
to unlock the door.
384
00:17:10,785 --> 00:17:13,686
Sir, I was given a
mission by Jack Flowers, the
385
00:17:13,721 --> 00:17:16,622
greatest white man since g.I.
Joe, and that mission is to
386
00:17:16,690 --> 00:17:17,957
get you out of here safely.
387
00:17:17,991 --> 00:17:20,126
Now, what's the password
to open the door?
388
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:21,327
Eat my ass!
389
00:17:21,361 --> 00:17:24,964
Sir, do not make me use
enhanced interrogation techniques.
390
00:17:25,032 --> 00:17:26,332
Eat my ass!
391
00:17:26,399 --> 00:17:27,399
Aah!
392
00:17:27,434 --> 00:17:28,867
♪ Stomp him in the nuts ♪
393
00:17:28,901 --> 00:17:30,235
Give us the password!
394
00:17:30,270 --> 00:17:31,236
Eat my ass!
395
00:17:31,304 --> 00:17:33,238
Eat my ass!
396
00:17:33,272 --> 00:17:34,339
♪ Stomp him in the nuts ♪
397
00:17:34,407 --> 00:17:35,407
♪ I'm-a stomp him in the nuts ♪
398
00:17:35,441 --> 00:17:37,342
Give us the password!
399
00:17:37,410 --> 00:17:38,877
Ruckus, wait!
400
00:17:38,911 --> 00:17:39,778
Aah!
401
00:17:39,845 --> 00:17:41,680
"Eat my ass."
402
00:17:43,049 --> 00:17:44,049
My God.
403
00:17:44,117 --> 00:17:45,150
What have I done?
404
00:17:45,184 --> 00:17:49,220
Oh, I have seen the
enemy, and it is me.
405
00:17:49,255 --> 00:17:50,421
Whoa, whoa, wait a minute.
406
00:17:50,489 --> 00:17:51,690
I can't find my iPhone!
407
00:17:51,758 --> 00:17:52,591
I think I dropped it.
408
00:17:52,658 --> 00:17:55,126
Ed, you dropped the
iPhone had everything on it?
409
00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:56,194
What if somebody found it?
410
00:17:56,228 --> 00:17:58,029
They'd know exactly
where...
411
00:17:58,063 --> 00:18:00,598
Tell me who the man
is on these t-shirts.
412
00:18:00,666 --> 00:18:03,835
He's a dead man just like you!
413
00:18:07,940 --> 00:18:09,540
Oh!
414
00:18:13,312 --> 00:18:15,112
What?! What, huh?!
415
00:18:15,147 --> 00:18:18,315
What?!
416
00:18:18,383 --> 00:18:20,284
Oh, no!
417
00:18:20,318 --> 00:18:21,853
Aah!
418
00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:24,288
Aah!
419
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:29,294
Wow.
420
00:18:29,328 --> 00:18:33,031
Go ahead, Steve.
421
00:18:33,065 --> 00:18:35,766
I am so sorry, Mr. White Man.
422
00:18:35,801 --> 00:18:38,736
Never again will this
foot touch white nuts.
423
00:18:38,770 --> 00:18:40,738
Ruckus, come on!
424
00:18:43,841 --> 00:18:45,275
We got to go now!
425
00:18:45,309 --> 00:18:46,709
Come on!
426
00:18:46,743 --> 00:18:48,644
Run! Run!
427
00:19:10,067 --> 00:19:11,067
Huey, it's Jack.
428
00:19:11,101 --> 00:19:13,370
Did you get everyone out
of the building in time?
429
00:19:13,404 --> 00:19:15,906
Well, yeah, but
it was just one person.
430
00:19:15,940 --> 00:19:17,708
Meet me at the Wuncler estate.
431
00:19:17,742 --> 00:19:18,808
We're gonna finish this.
432
00:19:21,112 --> 00:19:24,280
These are hard times, and
Americans need inspiration.
433
00:19:24,314 --> 00:19:27,984
People want real life to be like
in the movies, with good guys
434
00:19:28,051 --> 00:19:30,886
and bad guys and black
guys... All that [bleep]
435
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:35,724
This country needed a rallying cry,
a reminder of why it's great to be American.
436
00:19:35,791 --> 00:19:37,892
So you just make this stuff up?
437
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:41,697
No! Several overpaid members of
the writers [bleep] Guild of
438
00:19:41,731 --> 00:19:42,965
America make this stuff up.
439
00:19:42,999 --> 00:19:44,266
This is just a joke to you.
440
00:19:44,334 --> 00:19:46,902
We're talking about the lives
of innocent Americans.
441
00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:49,437
Innocent American... Singular.
442
00:19:49,472 --> 00:19:52,440
Daniel Stucky, A.K.A.
Dan the security man.
443
00:19:52,474 --> 00:19:54,875
Have you ever met Dan Stucky, Jack?
444
00:19:54,909 --> 00:19:57,978
He's a [bleep]... A waste
of functioning organs.
445
00:19:58,045 --> 00:20:00,713
But dead, he would have
been a national hero.
446
00:20:00,748 --> 00:20:03,784
We had Dan the security man
action figures, fast-food
447
00:20:03,851 --> 00:20:07,788
tie-ins, video games, a limited-edition
collectible sneaker line.
448
00:20:07,822 --> 00:20:11,792
We had Dan ribbons, Dan buttons,
and Dan ringtones, and a feature
449
00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:13,894
film starring Jack black.
450
00:20:13,929 --> 00:20:15,329
And all he had to do is die.
451
00:20:15,397 --> 00:20:16,230
But why?
452
00:20:16,265 --> 00:20:18,867
Don't you have enough money?
453
00:20:18,901 --> 00:20:22,871
No.
454
00:20:22,939 --> 00:20:24,239
I'm taking you into custody.
455
00:20:24,274 --> 00:20:27,676
You have till the count
of 3, or I will shoot.
456
00:20:27,711 --> 00:20:31,414
1...
More than enough time.
457
00:20:31,482 --> 00:20:35,785
...2...
458
00:20:35,820 --> 00:20:37,254
Huh?
Agent Flowers.
459
00:20:37,321 --> 00:20:39,222
Jack, it's the president.
460
00:20:39,290 --> 00:20:42,958
First of all, I want to
congratulate you on the fine
461
00:20:42,993 --> 00:20:44,760
work you've done today.
462
00:20:44,794 --> 00:20:49,331
But, Mr. President, this man
has conspired to... Yes, sir.
463
00:20:49,399 --> 00:20:51,233
Yes, Mr. President.
464
00:20:52,435 --> 00:20:54,403
You can let yourselves out.
465
00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:59,140
Huey, you did a good thing today.
466
00:20:59,175 --> 00:21:01,409
You saved a man's life.
467
00:21:01,444 --> 00:21:03,144
They don't win until you give up.
468
00:21:03,212 --> 00:21:04,946
They don't win until
you stop fighting.
469
00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:07,115
You can't fight the future.
470
00:21:07,183 --> 00:21:09,384
Don't waste your life trying.
471
00:21:09,419 --> 00:21:10,386
Boy!
472
00:21:10,420 --> 00:21:12,221
Oh, we're so glad you're okay.
473
00:21:12,256 --> 00:21:14,390
I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you.
474
00:21:16,126 --> 00:21:17,193
Back off!
475
00:21:17,228 --> 00:21:19,095
Everyone stay back or he dies!
476
00:21:19,129 --> 00:21:20,830
He-e-e-e-e-lp!
477
00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:22,198
Somebody shoot this [bleep]
478
00:21:22,232 --> 00:21:23,766
You can't do this to me!
479
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:25,201
Let me go.
You know who I am?
480
00:21:25,235 --> 00:21:26,135
Can't do this!
481
00:21:26,169 --> 00:21:27,303
What are you waiting for?
482
00:21:27,338 --> 00:21:28,471
Shoot him!
483
00:21:28,505 --> 00:21:31,008
Can't do this!
484
00:21:39,851 --> 00:21:41,752
Man, we might
have to think about moving.
485
00:21:41,819 --> 00:21:43,753
This neighborhood ain't'
what it used to be.
486
00:21:43,788 --> 00:21:44,821
Oh, man!
487
00:21:44,856 --> 00:21:48,925
We saw you on the news with all
them marines pointing guns at you.
488
00:21:48,992 --> 00:21:50,359
And you was looking hard, too.
489
00:21:50,394 --> 00:21:52,361
You was like, "What? What?"
490
00:21:52,395 --> 00:21:54,363
Man, Huey, you
were really right this time.
491
00:21:54,397 --> 00:21:56,098
You said it was gonna
happen, and it happened.
492
00:21:56,132 --> 00:21:59,202
Imagine all of the problems we could
avoid if we ever started listening to you.
493
00:21:59,236 --> 00:22:01,204
Oh, well!
494
00:22:01,205 --> 00:22:11,205
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www.addic7ed.com
495
00:22:11,255 --> 00:22:15,805
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