All language subtitles for Jack of All Trades s01e07 Daddy Dearest.eng

Jack, I've been doing
some thinking.

You have?

This simmering passion
must be satisfied.

It must?
I want you.

You do?

Take me, right here.

Right now.

I'm trying!

In your dreams,
Monsieur Stiles.

(GASPING)

Thank goodness you
regained consciousness.

The knockout gas works, but I'm
still working on the side effects.

Do me a favor, will you?

Next time, try and make things
a little easier to untie.

Pardon?

Hello! Let us hurry!

I must be off
on a special assignment.

Special assignment, eh?

If I know you, you're going out
to chase a little tail-feather.

I cannot tell a lie, Jacques.

I have met a ladybird.
She is the dove of my life.

Ah, don't get too attached, she's just
gonna leave you for a bigger cockatoo.

Oh, it is not the size
of the beak,

but the ruffle
of the feathers.

All right, all right. Is
there a reason why you're here?

(SQUAWKS) A shipment
will be arriving today,

from England, in a crate marked
with a red X. Vive la résistance!

She's just gonna break
his little heart.

Our invasion will take
the island of Tengu

and its precious spices
once and for all.

It had better.

I have just had a communiqué
from my brother,

"Screw up this invasion

"and you will be singing soprano
in the imperial boys' choir.

"Love, Napoleon."

I assure you, mon gouverneur,
we will not fail.

That Napoleon was always
a rotten wretch.

Pulled hair. Bit. Gave
me a terrible undy grundy.

Ours was
a dysfunctional family.

Not to worry. We have
amassed 5,000 troops.

With them,
we will take Tengu.

With Tengu, we will take
the undies... Indies.

Perhaps I should have been
kinder to him as a boy.

I used to steal
his share of the pudding.

How was I to know
he'd become a great dictator?

Governor, if I may direct
your attention,

let us go over the
disposition of our forces.

Why bother? We both know what will
become of your elaborate stratagems

once the Daring Dragoon
arrives.

But Governor, my men...

Cannot even spell "Dragoon",
let alone catch one.

This time will be different,
I assure you.

One man alone cannot defeat the
sheer might of an entire army.

EMILIA: Just leave it there.
Thanks.

Allow me.

What for?

'Cause, babycakes,
without my help,

(LAUGHING) You're gonna
be here all day long!

How time flies!

Goodness.

Where can one get a decent
gin and tonic on this island?

Father?

(SINGING) In 1801,
the Revolution had been won

And Uncle Sam's favorite son

Had a job he needed done

Which brought Jack to a lady

Both beautiful and smart

Who found his mix intriguing

A scoundrel with a heart!

From the Halls of Montezuma

To the shores of Tripoli

There was never
a leatherneck braver

A daring dragoon is he!

He'll halt the bold advance

Of Napoleon's attack

There ain't a French
or pirate rogue

Who don't know Jack!

From the Halls of Montezuma

To the shores of Tripoli

Sailin' 'round
the bloody world

To defend democracy

And when ya need
a fightin' man

To trust or watch your back

Just ask the bloke
right next to ya

Damn right!

It's Jack!

Father!

Fu-fu!

Fu-fu? Father, what on
Earth are you doing here?

Stopping this blasted
invasion, of course.

I've been sent here
to supervise the two of you

on direct orders
from high command.

It seems our paths intersect
once again, Mr. Stiles.

The last time we met, I was
attempting to hurl you off a cliff.

Jolly good fun.

Oh, then there was the time I ran
you over with that ox cart in Philly.

Ah, the Revolution.
Those were the days, huh?

It seems strange to be on the
same side now though, does it not?

Ah, I look forward to it,
Rupe.

Truth is, I think you're one
of the greatest spies alive.

To tell you the truth,
I think I am, too!

You never told me
you knew each other.

You never told me your father
was England's greatest spy.

Impressed?

Well, of course,
but I'm not about to admit it.

You know, this will be
a bloody good show.

And how could I possibly
pass up the chance to see

my lovely little Fu-fu again
after all these years?

Father, if we're going to be
working on assignment together,

I'd appreciate it if you
called me by my proper title.

Of course, Agent Fu-fu.

Now, Daddy's got you
a little present.

Perfume from Paris,

so you can continue to
cultivate your feminine mystique

even on this
godforsaken sand trap.

How thoughtful.

Now, then, let's catch up
over drinks, shall we, Jack?

Lead the way, Rupster.

What about me?

Ah, yes. Have my things sent
round to your house.

And I'd like a roast dinner
and a bottle of claret.

A good vintage, eh?

Hey, I don't know what your
secret is, but I want lessons.

SIR RUPERT: And while I was digging
out from under the avalanche,

Jack put laxatives in the food
supply of an entire English regiment

just before the battle.

You should have seen
those redcoats run.

Yes, you always were
a crafty one, Stiles.

Maybe even more underhanded
than I.

Oh, it's nice of you
to say, there, Rupster,

but when it comes to twisting
that knife with a smile,

you're the king, baby.

Oh, how about some peas,
Fu-fu?

Kind words, but give yourself
proper credit.

No one can hatch a
bold-faced lie quite like you.

Oh, stop.

Sorry to break up
the mutual admiration society,

but shouldn't we discuss how we
plan to halt the Governor's invasion?

A capital idea.

Leave it to Fu-fu to hit the
nail squarely on the head.

Any ideas, Stiles?

Oh, well,
as the superior officer,

I figured we'd just follow
your plan.

Oh, no, no, no. As the host, why
don't we hear your plan first?

No, no, no! You first.

No, no, no. I insist.
After you.

We attack the munitions dump,

blow up the French
powder stores.

They'll still have an army, but they
won't be able to fire their guns.

I could create a diversion
outside of the warehouse.

While I sneak in
and light the gunpowder.

Stiles, I think we've got it.

You and me, Rupe.

Excuse me.

Yes?

Glad to see
I'm still part of the team.

Of course.
Credit where credit's due.

The meal is superb, Fu-fu.

And you look stunning tonight.

Did you lose weight?

Have a little more wine,
Fu-fu.

Fu-fu?

JACK:
Daughters. Go figure.

Stiles, my boy,

there's something wrong
between my daughter and me.

No matter how hard I try,
I always seem to upset her.

Well, you've come
to the right place.

I'm an expert
at upsetting Emilia.

What is it exactly
that bothers her?

Well, in my case,
it's walking, talking,

standing, sitting, eating,
sleeping.

Pretty much anything I do
drives her crazy.

It's a gift.

If I ask her directly, she tells
me that nothing's the matter.

Hmm.

Which is why I was rather hoping
that you could do me a favor.

Do try and determine
what's wrong between us.

Tactfully, of course.

Oh, not to worry, Rupe.
Tact is my middle name.

The munitions warehouse is just
ahead. A squad of guards in front.

Act casually.

By the way, I was wondering,
for no particular reason

that you should at all
be suspicious about,

what's the problem between
you and your old man?

Oh, you two have been
talking, I see.

Whatever gave you
that idea?

I mean, it's not like he told
me to ask you that or anything.

But, you know, while
we're on the subject...

My father's a great man,
Jack.

Just not a great father.

It appears the Governor
has stationed snipers

on the rooftops
across from the building.

Yeah, yeah, back to the issue at hand.

Seems to me like your
pop spoils you rotten.

Oh, that's precisely
the problem.

He treats me like
a little girl.

Fu-fu?
God, I hate that name.

Well, problem solved.

From now on, I'll tell him to
pretend that he respects you.

You'll do no such thing.

I will not beg for his
respect. I'll earn it.

If you ask me, you two
could use some counseling.

(SCOFFS)

Hey, now,
don't be so surprised.

I'm not all
fists and fury.

"Sensitive Stiles,"
they call me.

Who calls you that?

Plenty of people.

I like kittens,
I like daisies. I cry.

I mean, granted, it's when I get
hurt, but no one blubbers like me.

If you don't duck, Jack,
I'll make you cry.

(PEOPLE SHOUTING)

What'd you do that for?

Testing the defenses.

The soldiers are on
high alert.

We'll need to stage a coordinated
attack using my knockout gas.

I've got to hand it to you,
Fu-fu.

This knockout gas rigmarole
is adorable.

However,
we won't be needing it.

But the gas is the most humane and
effective way to neutralize the guards.

We might as well release it.

Well, personally, I have a rule
never to release my gas in public.

Agreed. It's hardly
a gentlemanly way to fight

and nor is it a substitute for
a sword and a good pair of fists.

(SIGHING) Okay.

Then how do you propose
I neutralize the guards?

You won't. You'll stay here
and hold down the fort.

Well, I don't accept that.

This is my mission as well!

As the ranking officer,
I beg to differ.

Then my official report
will reflect my dissension.

I'm sorry to hear that.

I'll buy you a new parasol
to make it up to you.

I'll see you at dawn, Stiles.

With all due respect, sir,
my report will dissent, too.

Usually when she has a hunch about
things like this, she's right.

And don't you dare
hold that against me.

I'll say it again, we attack
at dawn, without Emilia,

and that's a direct order.

My father can be
such a fool sometimes.

You got that right, sister!

Don't you talk about
my father like that!

(SOUNDING OFF IN FRENCH)

There's too many soldiers.

I say we call it a day
and come up with a new plan.

Yes. I already have one.

Why don't you change out
of that ridiculous costume?

Sir, I'll have you know, this
outfit has been remarkably effective.

How? By causing the French soldiers
to laugh themselves to death?

Hiding behind a mask
isn't cricket, Stiles.

I can't permit you
to fight like that.

Well, mask or no mask,
I say we don't fight at all.

There's too many soldiers.

You believe we'll lose?

One thing I've learned
from your daughter.

If you don't fight when you
can't win, you never lose.

My daughter taught you
to run from a fight?

Shame on you both, sir!

She learned it from you.

The Quebec assignment, 1760?

It was a case study
in sneakery, she said.

She's studied
the Quebec campaign, did she?

She's studied
all your missions.

Well, then, of course,
she should know

that Quebec did not require
a direct attack,

while our advance today would
benefit from precisely that.

Look, we're not gonna
get past those guards

without getting ourselves
filled with a bunch of new holes,

and frankly, I'm happy
with the ones I already have.

Then stay and watch me
take the glory, coward.

No, no, no!

Onward to victory!

Nice hat, monsieur.

Onward to victory, indeed.

Prepare to die.

Well, lookie what
what we have here.

A circle of jerks.

That's how you cure lockjaw.

Charge him!

All right, Rupert.
You and me, buddy.

Now it's time for a little
"duck, duck, goose."

Duck!

Duck!

Goose!

Time to blow, daddy-o.
Coward, eh?

Is there anything else
you need?

A warm bath?
Something to eat?

Strange, you're the one
taking care of me now.

I suppose that's what happens
when you grow old.

Oh, you're not old.

London seems to think so.

I wasn't going to say anything,
but this is my last mission.

Forcibly retired.

I'll have to sell the house.
Can't live off my pension.

What do you mean,
"Sell the house"?

What about your savings?
What savings?

Well, you must have
something.

We always lived
comfortably. I had tutors.

My laboratory tuition
to Oxford.

Precisely.

Everything went on your
education. I saved nothing.

But I don't regret it
for a moment.

I never knew.

And you never took interest
in my scientific pursuits.

Well, I suppose I never
forgave that damnable gravity

for what it did to your
mother's once-perky buttocks.

Though I will admit, that
sleeping-gas idea of yours

would have been
a far better plan, after all.

Then why did you keep me
out of the mission?

I wanted to protect you,
keep you out of harm's way.

You've never believed in me
as a spy.

I've always believed in you.

But I know
the life of a spy.

Always in danger,
always on the run.

I was terrified my little girl
would come back to England in a box.

I always felt the same way
about you.

SIR RUPERT: I don't know
anything else.

I want to be like you.

Oh! Like me?
Old and out to pasture?

(CLEARING THROAT)

I've been to the armory.
We can hit it again at dawn.

No, we can't.
What do you mean?

The armory's our best shot,
no pun intended.

And it will be destroyed,
but not by us. By him.

Single-handedly.

Now, listen, kid, I'm telling
you, he can't handle it.

No, you listen to me, Jack.

I never knew my father sacrificed his
own needs to give me a proper life.

The least I can do
is give him back his dignity.

Besides, I believe
I have the foolproof plan.

Father,
you'll need to prepare.

You assault the armory
at dawn.

Haven't you been listening?
I've lost it.

Nonsense.

You'd have succeeded last time,
if Jack weren't in the way.

Yeah, yeah.

You would have been much better
off if I hadn't stepped in there.

Only a man of your experience
can pull it off.

You must do it. Please!

For England

and for me.

Right you are.

Halt.

Pardonnez-moi, Madame Rothschild,
but this area is off-limits.

Silly me.
Thank you, Sergeant.

(SOLDIER SPEAKING FRENCH)

Ha! Onward to victory!

(ALL MUMBLING)

French fop!

Gallic girly boy!

Yes!

I still have it in me! Yes!

(SOUNDING OFF)

(SNORING)

Asleep on duty?

SOLDIER: The Dragoon!

It's past your bedtime, too, boys.

Get him. Get him!

Take a number, fellas.
'Cause everyone gets a turn.

Get him!

Come on, Rupert.
Get the lead out.

(CHATTERING)

My hero.
You're so handsome.

You're too kind. Would you
hold that? Thanks very much.

What's your daughter's name?
Oh. There you go, ma'am.

Gotta go! See you!
I'll be back!

Damn, I'm good.

It's been a pleasure
serving under you, sir.

Likewise, Stiles.

You're not quite the man I
thought you were, but you'll learn.

By the way,
that Dragoon costume?

Yeah?

It sort of grows on you.

(LAUGHING) Huh?

I love you, my dear.

I love you, too, Dad.

You don't know how much
that means to me, Emilia.

You call me Fu-fu.

And that barrel you dropped
in the warehouse?

It almost took my head off,

otherwise, the operation
was a great success.

You're a bloody good spy,
little girl.

Yeah. Well,
it runs in the family, Dad.

JACK: See you later, Rupster.

Till we meet again!

RUPERT:
Now, where is that gin? Ah.

So, how'd you get
the name Fu-fu, anyway?

When I was three, one of my
male playmates patronized me.

Much as you're doing now. And?

I fu him fu
an open window.

And while we're on
the subject,

how did you get a name
like Little Willy?

Oh, Little Willy... What...
Where'd you hear that?

A letter arrived from
your father this morning.

Oh, for the love of God,
you give me that thing!

Give me that letter!
No!

You give it to me right now!
Little Willy!

JACK: Fu-fu! You hear me?
Stop that woman!

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0